My Ideal What-he-said.
Verghastinsel
13-10-2005, 03:40
Rule #1 I am in charge, and what I say is law. Other than that you can all go to hell while I eat my cornflakes off've a concubine's tits. With my tongue.
Heron-Marked Warriors
13-10-2005, 03:43
Rule #1 I am in charge, and what I say is law. Other than that you can all go to hell while I eat my cornflakes off've a concubine's tits. With my tongue.
Because most of us don't use tongues while eating.
And my girlfriend lets me eat crunchy nut cornflakes off her tits, and I don't have to pay her.
Verghastinsel
13-10-2005, 03:44
Because most of us don't use tongues while eating.
And my girlfriend lets me eat crunchy nut cornflakes off her tits, and I don't have to pay her.
Ah, but I don't have to pay because I say so and my word is law, you see?
Heron-Marked Warriors
13-10-2005, 03:48
Ah, but I don't have to pay because I say so and my word is law, you see?
Whatever your paid whores tell you, little man.
Verghastinsel
13-10-2005, 03:56
Whatever your paid whores tell you, little man.
They tell me what I tell them to tell me. Muahahaha.
Needs a little more fleshing out. I assume like all absolute autocratic dictators you will naturally want to have all legislative, judicial and executive powers concentrated within yourself? Will you arbitrate disputes personally or delegate the power? If you give yourself judicial power will you be bound by your own laws or just willfuly breach them as you wish? Will you meet out justice and create laws on a whim or try to establish some kind of precedent system?
Verghastinsel
13-10-2005, 04:17
Needs a little more fleshing out. I assume like all absolute autocratic dictators you will naturally want to have all legislative, judicial and executive powers concentrated within yourself? Will you arbitrate disputes personally or delegate the power? If you give yourself judicial power will you be bound by your own laws or just willfuly breach them as you wish? Will you meet out justice and create laws on a whim or try to establish some kind of precedent system?
Depends what mood I'm in. If I feel like taking an interest, I will allow an audience and decide from there. If I want to race F1 cars, I will tell someone to handle it, whatever it is.
"There's a war on, your Imperial Majesty."
"Fuck off, I'm busy."
Depends what mood I'm in. If I feel like taking an interest, I will allow an audience and decide from there. If I want to race F1 cars, I will tell someone to handle it, whatever it is.
"There's a war on, your Imperial Majesty."
"Fuck off, I'm busy."
I see. So not only will you rule completely arbirarily but also erratically and completely on a whim, breaking your own laws without any consideration. The best type of autocrat!
Verghastinsel
13-10-2005, 04:31
I see. So not only will you rule completely arbirarily but also erratically and completely on a whim, breaking your own laws without any consideration. The best type of autocrat!
Why, yes I am. The best ever.
Heron-Marked Warriors
13-10-2005, 04:37
Why, yes I am. The best ever.
Sure you are. The question is, Best Ever what?
I see. So not only will you rule completely arbirarily but also erratically and completely on a whim, breaking your own laws without any consideration. The best type of autocrat!
That reminds me so much of my own rule of the Multiverse it's scary...
Verghas, some tips for erratic ruling: Always exaggerate your mood. For instance, if you feel like playing with a toy castle, insist on building a real one, and in approximately the time it takes you to build one out of Legos (i.e. 1-4 hours).
Also, don't make the punishment fit the crime. Arrange for convicted rapists to be hung while being tickled on the soles of their feet with feathers, or have people who call you an egotistical f*** thrown into a 32-foot-deep vat full of liquid Jell-O with their mouth sewn shut and their hands tied behind their back.
Insist on keeping no regular habits or hours. Wake up at 6 one day and 13 the next, then spending all of one night playing NS and the next reading, and the next in sex, etc. Whenever you feel that you are getting into a regular schedule, do something crazy like order a concert of Ives's Concord Sonata played on a chocolate piano or have all the telephones in your domain thrown into the sea.
Finally, don't be afraid to use smileys. This one speaks for itself :)
~Czardas, Official Advisor to Non-Rulers
Verghastinsel
13-10-2005, 05:00
Sure you are. The question is, Best Ever what?
Best Ever Impersonator of Myself. :D
There are nineteen of us, now.
Best Ever Impersonator of Myself. :D
There are nineteen of us, now.
I can impersonate myself better than you can impersonate yourself, iThink. ;) :D