NationStates Jolt Archive

What is your worst date ever? And why?
Mine was in the eigth grade. I went with this guy to a dance, and not only did I find out he was cheating on his girlfriend with me, her friends beat up my date!
Needless to say, I haven't talked to him since.

I haven't had any dates. :(

What is your worst date ever? And why?
Mine was in the eigth grade. I went with this guy to a dance, and not only did I find out he was cheating on his girlfriend with me, her friends beat up my date!
Needless to say, I haven't talked to him since.

And how old are you now? 8th grade is what, 13/14? I highly doubt he was properly beaten up.

And why do I suspec that South Islands' response will be the most common among those who tell the truth? ;)

I love the internet

My worst date was September the 11th 2001. Boy did that ever suck.

Whats a date? :(

I haven't had any dates. :(
Awww, I've only had a few...like the one I just spoke of.
But thats mainly because I don't respond...properly when guys hit on me.

Awww, I've only had a few...like the one I just spoke of.
But thats mainly because I don't respond...properly when guys hit on me.

You hit back, eh?

Whats a date? :(
it when you go out with someone of the opposite sex (unless you're gay, then it's the same sex) in hopes of have a long lasting romantic relationship, hopefully ending in marriage and a family.

Lol.

I will be spared forever the pain of a relationship or even a date, fortunately.

You hit back, eh?
Yes, a few times I think I may have reduced their sperm count...

Whats a date? :(

It's when a woman convinces you to go somewhere you don't want to go, buy things you don't want to buy and do things you don't want to do in return for the promise of sexual favours.

That's if you're a man. If you're a woman, it's when you get free stuff off a man. The only thing you can't get on a date as a woman is sperm.

Lol.

I will be spared forever the pain of a relationship or even a date, fortunately.
Why? Is it because you're a member of the Inner Party?? You Ingsoc...people and your newspeak ways...!

Lol.

I will be spared forever the pain of a relationship or even a date, fortunately.
Haha! You wish. Don't worry, it only hurts so much but then you realize that a) you didn't die, b) you're not gonna die, and c) it was good while it lasted. ;)

What is your worst date ever? And why?
Mine was in the eigth grade. I went with this guy to a dance, and not only did I find out he was cheating on his girlfriend with me, her friends beat up my date!
Needless to say, I haven't talked to him since.

I had an experiance very close to yours. I wa out on a date with this girl. We went to a friend of hers house and while we were there, her boyfriend showed up. He cold cocked me, and I attacked back before I was even off the ground. Once I found out why we were fighting, I told hiom that I was sorry and left, only slightly bruised, battered and bleeding.

Me and him are pretty good friends now, and both think that she is a dirty whore.

Girl was sick on me once. Wasn't pleasant. Can't say I've had any rampantly awful ones though, really.

Had one ex who hacked my email account :( That was fun

Well, I suppose by default my worst date is also my best date. Seeing as I've only been on one.

Went to a fairly nice resturant in Liverpool with my girlfriend. Though slightly more expensive than I would usually be prepared to pay, the food was nice and the wine was most certainly drinkable.

Why? Is it because you're a member of the Inner Party?? You Ingsoc...people and your newspeak ways...!
War is Peace
Freedom is Slavery
Ignorance is Strength

I am watching you....

Haha! You wish. Don't worry, it only hurts so much but then you realize that a) you didn't die, b) you're not gonna die, and c) it was good while it lasted. ;)
Come on. Try your hardest to imagine someone who'd be interested in a guy like me.



....Come on.




...Then try to imagine me being interested in them...




...And you have a pretty good idea of what might happen. Nothing, that is. ;)

Yes, a few times I think I may have reduced their sperm count...

Ouch, not cool.

GG this topic.
____________________________________________________________
|<--where topic should be |<--where topic derailed to

Come on. Try your hardest to imagine someone who'd be interested in a guy like me.
....Come on.
...Then try to imagine me being interested in them...
...And you have a pretty good idea of what might happen. Nothing, that is. ;)
Unless you have the dead fetus of your unborned twin growing out of your forehead, there will be girls interested in you, and pretty girls. All you need to do is be funny and have some confidence.

Trouble is, as recent polls have indicated, not many NSers have that much dating experience. And anyway, people don't really like to boast (well, most don't) about when things go badly wrong.

I haven't had any dates. :(

...same

What is your worst date ever? And why?
Mine was in the eigth grade. I went with this guy to a dance, and not only did I find out he was cheating on his girlfriend with me, her friends beat up my date!

Needless to say, I haven't talked to him since.
I would have to say that my first date was also my worst date. Trust me ... you do not want to know! ROFL!

I would have to say that my first date was also my worst date. Trust me ... you do not want to know! ROFL!

Yeah we do.

I would have to say that my first date was also my worst date. Trust me ... you do not want to know! ROFL!

Come on, Eut.

Enlighten us to your Dateial woes.

Yeah we do.
Oh. Ok then. How about *I* don't want you to know? :D

Oh. Ok then. How about *I* don't want you to know? :D

**Buck buck buck. Buck buck buck**

It's a chicken, by the way. ;)

So you don't want us to know. Yet you still post on the internet so that we'll talk about it. (Which, annoyingly, is seen in action here.)

it when you go out with someone of the opposite sex (unless you're gay, then it's the same sex) in hopes of have a long lasting romantic relationship, hopefully ending in marriage and a family.

That is a dirty communist lie. I have never once hoped that I would marry someone - or even develop a lasting relationship with someone - that I dated.

Back to the topic at hand: I really haven't had any horrible dates, but when I was in high school I went out with this blond chick whose mom ended up stealing thousands from the library book sale profits.

Oh. Ok then. How about *I* don't want you to know? :D
Bah, methinks you don't remember anymore :D

He took me to a hockey game. :headbang:
Nuff said.

Unless you have the dead fetus of your unborned twin growing out of your forehead, there will be girls interested in you, and pretty girls. All you need to do is be funny and have some confidence.
I'm not particularly funny, I have no confidence, and generally it appears that my long hooked claws and blood-red eyes are a turn-off. Not to mention the black robes and the hood. :(

I'm not particularly funny, I have no confidence, and generally it appears that my long hooked claws and blood-red eyes are a turn-off. Not to mention the black robes and the hood. :(
Get a clean hood with no holes, patches, etc., make sure the claws are clean and manicured, learn some jokes, and go practice saying hi to girls. Your only objective is saying hi and see if you can make her smile, that's it. It may take a few dozen tries, but you don't stop until you get them to smile on a fairly regular basis.

I haven't had a particularly bad date...the first one I ever had was relative shit, but that's because I had no idea what to do. The relationship was a wasted month and a half anyway, so no big loss (in retrospect, of course).

Get a clean hood with no holes, patches, etc., make sure the claws are clean and manicured, learn some jokes, and go practice saying hi to girls. Your only objective is saying hi and see if you can make her smile, that's it. It may take a few dozen tries, but you don't stop until you get them to smile on a fairly regular basis.
...My hood has never had any holes or patches. My claws are always clean and manicured, because they're made of pure steel. I know a few jokes, but in combination with my whisper of a voice they sound very sinister, and when I say 'hi' to most females, they scream and run away (so do most males btw, unless they're carrying a gun, in which case they try to shoot me, then when they see the bullets bouncing off scream and run away....) Anyway, the only time I've ever made a member of the opposite sex was when I made a nice picture for my mother, just before stabbing her in the back as she bent down to look at it. :(

Anyway, the only time I've ever made a member of the opposite sex was when I made a nice picture for my mother, just before stabbing her in the back as she bent down to look at it. :(
Good, now try it without the stabbing. And if your voice scares them take up mimickry.

My worst date ever was Prom my senior year of high school. It was with my girlfriend at the time. It started of with us getting ditched by our group, we missed the first half of dinner because they started early and we both had had a concert that night which we butchered. It ended with her bawling about the day/life in general, and my knowing that the relationship was at an end. In no small part to the fact that it was on that date I figured out that she had not been completely loyal, but had still been seeing her "ex" throught almost the whole relationship.

Lousy date. But it is all water under the bridge now. Great girl, and a great friend.

Once, when I was dating this girl Julia, I planned a dinner and movie date with her, only to have her invite another guy to the movie portion. That was the most uncomfortable movie I've ever been to.

Good, now try it without the stabbing. And if your voice scares them take up mimickry.
Ok, Cap'n... *salutes*

And generally it's the voice-appearance combination that does it, I guess.... that or my 256 well-armed white-suited bodyguards....

Unless you have the dead fetus of your unborned twin growing out of your forehead, there will be girls interested in you, and pretty girls. All you need to do is be funny and have some confidence.



for people like me there is a -5/1 possibility of that.

I once went on a date with a guy because I was just trying to be nice. Big mistake. He invited me to a friend's house, and then didn't talk to me. I tried starting a conversation with him, but I think he was shy or something. Then, he took me by another friends house and left me in the car for 20 mins. So during that 20 mins, I called my girl up and had her call me a few mins later to say that she needed me to come pick her up really bad. I apologized and left. Now, I admit that last part of the date was mean on my part, but still. It was the longest 2 hr date of my life.

So you don't want us to know. Yet you still post on the internet so that we'll talk about it. (Which, annoyingly, is seen in action here.)
Poor baby. Tsk! :p

for people like me there is a -5/1 possibility of that.
Me too.

Not only am I fairly undesirable, I also go out of my way to avoid people, and I have no interest in meeting any.

Unless you have the dead fetus of your unborned twin growing out of your forehead, there will be girls interested in you, and pretty girls. All you need to do is be funny and have some confidence.
Apply this to females, will you. Now can an ugly chick ever hope of landing a good looking guy? I submit to you that she can not, realistically. So, what makes it different for guys? Your own wishful thinking?

Personally, I haven’t been on many dates, and the ones I have were uneventful, neither good nor bad. A friend of mine (who is a girl, so I guess she would know) told me that it has more to do with my personality than my appearance. Which is cool. I may be an asshole, but at least I’m not ugly. :p

Apply this to females, will you. Now can an ugly chick ever hope of landing a good looking guy? I submit to you that she can not, realistically. So, what makes it different for guys? Your own wishful thinking?



it's cos women are vain, and they think they'll look better by comparison.

Apply this to females, will you. Now can an ugly chick ever hope of landing a good looking guy? I submit to you that she can not, realistically. So, what makes it different for guys? Your own wishful thinking?

:rolleyes: You were told why, and by a girl.

Any date with someone who says they'll call you afterwards and doesn't...<grinds teeth angrily>

Once, when I was dating this girl Julia, I planned a dinner and movie date with her, only to have her invite another guy to the movie portion. That was the most uncomfortable movie I've ever been to.
<chanting> Threesome! Threesome! Threesome!

Apply this to females, will you. Now can an ugly chick ever hope of landing a good looking guy? I submit to you that she can not, realistically. So, what makes it different for guys? Your own wishful thinking?
Have you ever heard of a thing called personality?

I'm fairly unremarkable-looking, and I have a s*** personality. Count me out.

I've only been on one date, and it was a set-up. The only word to describe it is: awkward. We hardly talked the whole time, then I went home and cried.

I've only been on one date, and it was a set-up. The only word to describe it is: awkward. We hardly talked the whole time, then I went home and cried.
Yeah, well, you'll get better at it.

I've only been on one date, and it was a set-up. The only word to describe it is: awkward. We hardly talked the whole time, then I went home and cried.

But the fact that you went puts you one-up on about half of the people here.

Worst date? Does you not actually realizing your on a date count? Cause I was just being a good friend and getting this girl out of her house and then I cause she made up that I went out with her for a few weeks. That was odd, awkward and scary all at once. Other then when I was actually dating girls, those all went smooth. But that damn plutonic friend state has fucked me over for more then a year. I'd rather go on a bad date then have all the girls i know try to find me a girl when none all of them are the lookers, the rest are ugly or taken. I don't want to know what they'll find.

War is Peace
Freedom is Slavery
Ignorance is Strength

I am watching you....
Ahhh! No! I'm not a thought criminal!! Do anything, JUST DON'T TAKE ME TO ROOM 101!!!!!!!!

Unless spending hours working on computer programs or labs on campus with other classmates count, haven't had one. If they do count, then I must hold the record for most boring dates.

Unless spending hours working on computer programs or labs on campus with other classmates count, haven't had one. If they do count, then I must hold the record for most boring dates.
LOL, boring? Like what? "The tag for this line is...are you truely interested in this?" "Oh yes, quite. Infact, I always listen with my eyes closed and snoring..."

Ahh, well, since I'm overly trusting and love stories, I might as well get started...

My worst (and currently only) date was my junior prom, a few years ago. So I really liked a good friend of mine, from a few towns over, that I met through a community theatre group. She told me she like me too at some point, and it all seemed to be going well from there. We flirted a whole lot before I asked her out, and we ran into parent issues there. Her parents wouldn't allow her to date until she was 16 (she was 15 at the time, and I was...only 2 1/2 years older...shut up, it's not that sketchy. :rolleyes: ) But anyway, so after a little bit, I go out on a limb and invite her to the prom with me. Her parents give her a fairly early curfew, but they do agree that she can go, (as does she, obviously) and I was really happy about that.

However, this was still probably about a month before the actual date of the prom. We keep flirting a lot, but there's really very little else we can do, because her parents wouldn't let her go out with me except this one thing they decided they could make an exception for. It seems to me that we're both growing more and more attached to each other, but one day she just started getting a little distant. Never really said anything about it, but just a lot less enthusiastic, and I still haven't a clue what changed. This was probably still a couple weeks before the prom.

So basically, I keep trying to flirt with her, but I'm horrendously confused, and it was probably 4 or 5 days before the prom when I finally confronted her and said something to the effect of "I can't go on wondering about this all the time. If anything has changed, you need to tell me." And so she does...something about not wanting commitment, and things moving too fast (umm, we hadn't even been on a single date yet...and how often is it the girl who uses that line?) She had been waiting to tell me until after the prom, because she didn't want to make it awkward. Well, I guess I screwed that one up, but I had already figured out enough that it probably would have been awkward anyway.

So, we still went to the prom together. But we both knew it was over before it even began. We danced a few times, and talked some, but knowing that had really put a damper on things. There were no sparks left. Since she wasn't from my town, she didn't know a single other person there. My older brother picked us up after, took her home, and I didn't see her again for probably 4 months at least.

That's still the only date I've ever had, and I remember it sort of bittersweet-ish, because she made me incredibly happy for a few weeks, but it all slipped through my fingers. Since then I've been making a pattern of becoming best friends with girls I like, but none of them want any more. The last one told me she likes other girls. (Oops!) I'm not particularly attractive, but I don't think I'm ugly either. I've got a sense of humor, and I'm pretty sure there are girls out there who like me, but I haven't a clue who they are, so it doesn't help much.

Way to go oversharing! Anyone else want to join me?

I once double dated with twins and ended up making out with the wrong one... Needless to say the force of the subsequent slap sent me back in time to the French Revolution.

Never had a date, and probably won't until after college. I shall use my statistics to back me up.

I am in high school. In high school there are lots o' couples and stuff saying"I'll love you forever and always", right? Well, only 1% of those happy couples actaully marry, and only 10% of those couples keep their marrages for more than 2 years. So technically speaking, of all high school couples, my chance of loving them for about2 years time after getting married is about 0.001%. I think people get hit by lighting on those odds....

Worst date ever....well I don't see how it can get much worse then this.

I went with this one girl to a New Years Party. I ended up showing up about 15 minutes late (which can hardly count as being late), and when I get there, the girl I was meeting at this party was already sitting on some other guys lap, and holding hands with him. Well I didn't do anything cause I was, i'll admit, in shock about this. About an hour later, they started making out right in front of me and that's when I left the room. Then they come out about 20 minutes later, and we all just sit around waiting for New Years. Well midnight comes and she STILL had the nerve to kiss me. I didn't let her because I was so pissed at her. She then walked hand in hand with the other guy after that for the rest of the night. She calls me the next day wondering why I didn't kiss her, or even really talk to her for the matter. What kind of question is that? ANyways, I tell her and she breaks down and starts crying and I'm sick of it so i just tell her, ya know if you had really been interested, you woudln't have done that.

Now I can't find a reason why she'd want to do this to me, as me being one of her best friends. I just don't get it. And here's a kicker, the guy she made out with was one of my bestfriends.

Definatly a setback, only had one date since then which ended horrible.

Never had a date, and probably won't until after college. I shall use my statistics to back me up.

I am in high school. In high school there are lots o' couples and stuff saying"I'll love you forever and always", right? Well, only 1% of those happy couples actaully marry, and only 10% of those couples keep their marrages for more than 2 years. So technically speaking, of all high school couples, my chance of loving them for about2 years time after getting married is about 0.001%. I think people get hit by lighting on those odds....
Aaaaw Someone needs a blowjob... :fluffle:

Never had a date, and probably won't until after college. I shall use my statistics to back me up.

I am in high school. In high school there are lots o' couples and stuff saying"I'll love you forever and always", right? Well, only 1% of those happy couples actaully marry, and only 10% of those couples keep their marrages for more than 2 years. So technically speaking, of all high school couples, my chance of loving them for about2 years time after getting married is about 0.001%. I think people get hit by lighting on those odds....

Shit kid. You might want to do it just to get the experience from it. If you wait till your out of college your going to be straight fucked in the dating scene.

Shit kid. You might want to do it just to get the experience from it. If you wait till your out of college your going to be straight fucked in the dating scene.I suppose he could be a niche dater, and date women who want to remain virgins until they're married.

I suppose he could be a niche dater, and date women who want to remain virgins until they're married.

Not even the sex part. You need to know how to approach and do the rest of that shit. Walking in blind is just asking to get shot down. Might as well do it when your a teen when everything is awkward.

Not even the sex part. You need to know how to approach and do the rest of that shit. Walking in blind is just asking to get shot down. Might as well do it when your a teen when everything is awkward.
Oh, fair enough. Even virgin girls don't want to date an awkward, stammering guy.

Oh, fair enough. Even virgin girls don't want to date an awkward, stammering guy.
Yeah. The last thing you want your first time to be is a couple short, sharp, pelvic thrusts at your bellybuttom and a quick seizure leaving your midsection sticky and you confused and disappointed.

Shit kid. You might want to do it just to get the experience from it. If you wait till your out of college your going to be straight fucked in the dating scene.

Oh. Now I feel bad. Thanks for the moral support.

Well, I'm 13, not a looker, small for my age (so I look like a 10 year old) have a crap personality, most people hate me crap, poor, white. Hmm, I have a real good chance for dating :headbang:

Oh. Now I feel bad. Thanks for the moral support.

Hey I just don't want ya throwing away some good years man.

Hey I just don't want ya throwing away some good years man.

I'm not throwing it away. I'm just saving myself from being turned down and getting all depressed. High school is the most emotional point in a persons life.

Well, I'm 13, not a looker, small for my age (so I look like a 10 year old) have a crap personality, most people hate me crap, poor, white. Hmm, I have a real good chance for dating :headbang:
I'm 23, damned sexy, fairly built have a kick ass personality, people love me, fairly well off, black and enjoy dating, What was my point? Oh yes. I was you at your age. Trust me, hang in there. You're probally hung like a horse and until chicks have a little wear, they won't be able to handle that. They'll love you alter though. Uh...yup that's it.

Well, I'm 13, not a looker, small for my age (so I look like a 10 year old) have a crap personality, most people hate me crap, poor, white. Hmm, I have a real good chance for dating :headbang:
Come back in three years.

I'm not throwing it away. I'm just saving myself from being turned down and getting all depressed. High school is the most emotional point in a persons life.
Unless you shield yourself from all emotion. In which case it's the bleakest point in a persons life.

I'm 23, damned sexy, fairly built have a kick ass personality, people love me, fairly well off, black and enjoy dating, What was my point? Oh yes. I was you at your age. Trust me, hang in there. You're probally hung like a horse and until chicks have a little wear, they won't be able to handle that. They'll love you alter though. Uh...yup that's it.
From this description, you sound conceited. So I can see why you're popular in the dating scene.

Unless you shield yourself from all emotion. In which case it's the bleakest point in a persons life.

.....True. But I don't shield myself from emotion, I just prevent myself from depression.

From this description, you sound conceited. So I can see why you're popular in the dating scene. ROFL :D

From this description, you sound conceited. So I can see why you're popular in the dating scene.
Thank you. Normally I get "egotistical fuckbag". :p :D

Thank you. Normally I get "egotistical fuckbag". :p :DLol. While I don't view egoism as a good thing, I don't think it warrants being called a "fuckbag".

I've never been on a date. It's not that I'm ugly or uninterested or some other undesirable trait. There just isn't anybody worth dating out here in the middle of nowhere. :headbang:

Worst date ever had to be this one girl, let’s just call her Rachel, since thats what I called her.

So, she lives across the city from me, not to far away, but on the way there I got stuck in an accident. I left early, but I called her to tell her I will probably be late, and to wait about 15 minutes before coming. She was already there. Great, so now I am feeling guilty sitting in traffic. I was sitting there with my windows cracked, and all of a sudden I feel something wet on my hand, I look down and it is black. I got very upset, I did not know what it was, and I did not want to know what it was. I found out, there was a cattle semi right next to me, and the cows were shooting feces onto my car, all over the roof and the driver side doors, running down my windows and all over my door handle.

I finally get to the place, we sit down and I try to start a conversation. "How was your week?" "Great, yesterday I went on this date with this guy and we really hit it off, I think I will go out with him again this weekend." What the heck! She didn't even seem to notice that what she said was an instant date killer. I had to supply the entire conversation to, she was trying to give decent responses, but everything she said was one or two sentence answers.

Worst date ever had to be this one girl, let’s just call her Rachel, since thats what I called her.

So, she lives across the city from me, not to far away, but on the way there I got stuck in an accident. I left early, but I called her to tell her I will probably be late, and to wait about 15 minutes before coming. She was already there. Great, so now I am feeling guilty sitting in traffic. I was sitting there with my windows cracked, and all of a sudden I feel something wet on my hand, I look down and it is black. I got very upset, I did not know what it was, and I did not want to know what it was. I found out, there was a cattle semi right next to me, and the cows were shooting feces onto my car, all over the roof and the driver side doors, running down my windows and all over my door handle.

I finally get to the place, we sit down and I try to start a conversation. "How was your week?" "Great, yesterday I went on this date with this guy and we really hit it off, I think I will go out with him again this weekend." What the heck! She didn't even seem to notice that what she said was an instant date killer. I had to supply the entire conversation to, she was trying to give decent responses, but everything she said was one or two sentence answers.Traffic, cow shit & antoher man? The perfect date!

Well, I'm 13, not a looker, small for my age (so I look like a 10 year old) have a crap personality, most people hate me crap, poor, white. Hmm, I have a real good chance for dating :headbang:
You don't know what you look like because you're not done growing yet. Wait, kid, wait -- and in the meantime, play soccer. Trust me. I'm a grown woman. I know what I'm talking about. ;)

My worst date? Well, in high school, I actually had pretty good dates. It's gotten worse every year after that. Worst so far? Through mutual friends, I met this randy candidate for mayor (of the city we lived in) who chased me around at social events like a horny chihuahua for a couple of months before asking for my number. So he calls, asks me out for dinner, I say yes, he shows up, dressed well enough, etc., but not only has he not one blessed thing to say to me, he doesn't even try to make a pass at me -- after all that groping build-up!! WTF!! We go to a good restaurant that we both knew well, and he just chowed down on his food -- rather grossly -- and didn't even look up. I tried to get some chat going -- asked about his mayoral run, his personal interests, etc. -- he barely responded. I ended up just enjoying these other guys who were at the bar -- behind him -- and were giving me the why-are-you-wasting-your-time-with-that-loser look. But then he finished eating and was ready to go. He had no further plan for the night and we were just walking vaguely back to my place -- not talking -- and that's when this date drifted into a subtle new realm. The guy just started walking ahead of me, not even looking to see if I was keeping up. And I started slowing down, just watching him walk, as if he was alone. He got up to about 20 feet ahead of me, completely unaware, and at that moment, I chickened out of doing something I really should have done. We had gotten to an intersection. If we went straight, we'd be heading towards my place. If I turned left, I could walk on up to a bar where my friend was a bartender. I knew she was working that night. I could easily have gone my own way without his even noticing until he got to my place and found I wasn't there. And this would have been fun because that bar was usually full of people who knew him well. But I didn't, I just let him walk me home and said good-bye (and good riddance) at the door. I especially regretted not going to the bar the next day, when I did gossip about him to our mutual friends, and everybody laughed and laughed and then told me about the 4 babies he'd had with ex girlfriends, none of whom he supported. (One of those exes showed up at one of his press conferences. He didn't get elected, btw.)

The moral of the story is, seize your opportunities when they come.

So, can anyone tell me, why this loser asked me out in the first place???

Worst date ever had to be this one girl, let’s just call her Rachel, since thats what I called her.

So, she lives across the city from me, not to far away, but on the way there I got stuck in an accident. I left early, but I called her to tell her I will probably be late, and to wait about 15 minutes before coming. She was already there. Great, so now I am feeling guilty sitting in traffic. I was sitting there with my windows cracked, and all of a sudden I feel something wet on my hand, I look down and it is black. I got very upset, I did not know what it was, and I did not want to know what it was. I found out, there was a cattle semi right next to me, and the cows were shooting feces onto my car, all over the roof and the driver side doors, running down my windows and all over my door handle.

I finally get to the place, we sit down and I try to start a conversation. "How was your week?" "Great, yesterday I went on this date with this guy and we really hit it off, I think I will go out with him again this weekend." What the heck! She didn't even seem to notice that what she said was an instant date killer. I had to supply the entire conversation to, she was trying to give decent responses, but everything she said was one or two sentence answers.


That must have sucked. Alot.

Ugh so many in so little time. (Freshman year)

Probably the worst was when this girl asked me to the mall. For lack of a better saying she was the top girl in our class; the kind that every guy knew who she was and was friends with every girl. I was the cute shy kid who never said much but had (still do :D) a heart of gold that was hard to see through my quiet exterior. Needless to say dates where rare for me and this goddess invited me on a date was a shock to the system.

Anyway things were going fine we laughed, talked, and pranced around the mall like your average teenage couple. But then IT happened. Her cellphone rings and she answers. After a couple of nods she looks worriedly at me and keeps saying "Now's not a good time", "maybe next week", "No, it's not that I don't...oh ok I'm down by the food court". I went from ebullient outgoing friendly guy to ok wtf is going on guy. Five mintues later the biggest duecsh bag senior marches up and shit just rolled down hill from there.

Anyway she went out with him for the rest of the year. He treated her like shit, she came to me crying about it, I kicked his ass in a parking lot (self-defense), she hated me for it.

I love happy endings. Multiply that by about 5 and that was my freshman year.

One of my friends got me to go on a date with one of his friends who had a huge crush on me. I wasn't interested in the guy at all... he was awkward and upon further inspection, not terribly clean.

We went bowling. 5 pin bowling. I kicked his ass. Horribly. Twice.

Then we went to get pizza. We made small talk, he brought up that he'd never been kissed... and that he'd brought along some mints for such a purpose... Seriously, talk about awkward... he didn't actually try to make a move and I sure as hell wasn't going to. I mean, way to add pressure to somebody "Oh, by the way, I've never been kissed and I expect you to change that without any effort to attain this end on my part."

Yo mama so bald you can see whats on her mind.

I was seriously hoping for some funny ones, you're breaking my heart here man...

my second gf in 6th grade, i'm in 7th right now, this girl was so f**king obsessed with me, and I decided to give her a chance because I didn't know her and I don't like to hurt people's feelings. Basically, I didn't like her much
So I went out with her and it became my own personal controvery because all my friends thought I was stupid of going out with her, and a lot of people made fun of me
we went out for, about, three-four days and the school dance was coming up on a Friday, she talked to me about it via note, and I started wanting to break with her before the dance
I did and I made a good descision, besides I couldn't stand everyone talking to me about it, and I couldn't stand her being too obsessed with me (I don't know why she was, I'm pretty much a moderate (ugly, as everyone calls me) guy who's been out with three girls, including my current relationship,)
I know I will never go out with a girl who I barely even know or just can't stand ever again!

(but my current relationship is GOING GREAT!)

one of them was a blind date that my friend set me up on in which 5 min into the date the guy brings up a very weird and very gross sexual fetish that he has. I left very quickly and changed my cell # so he couldn't contact me EVER!!!


I think though the absolute worst date ever was the date I went on the Friday night before my first date with my husband.

The key thing to remember here is that I was a vegan (ie no meat, no animal products, no animal by-products)

This guy asks me out for 6 months straight and I keep saying "no" because something about him bothers me so anyway after a while I get tired of him bothering me and I tell him "I will go out on a date with you, but I am not obligated to any more than that, if after 1 date we don't mesh well, you HAVE
to leave me alone"
He agrees.
He comes to pick me up, he is 30 min late, he honks from my driveway.
I get in his car and he has the entire back seat taken up with speakers and has music turned up so loud that it would be pointless to carry on a conversation.
He takes me to a steak house. He has made reservations for the "Angus Room" which would have been nice except there is this really big photo mural of cows staring at me now. He sits with his back to the cows. They are looking at me. The waitress comes out. He orders a steak for me. I decline and say I would like a salad plain, no bacon, no dressing. He proceeds to order himself a steak, rare, and he says "just run it through a warm room, better yet give me a fork and a knife and point me to the herd" He laughs, I am not amused. His steak comes and he cuts into it an blood poors out, he looks satisfied. I am about to throw up at this point so I pull out my cell and call and ask someone to come get me.
He says "you know it is really rude to talk on your cell phone on a date, you never think about other people do you?"
My friend came and got me. He emailed me about how I was an ungrateful B****. oh well. :rolleyes:

one of them was a blind date that my friend set me up on in which 5 min into the date the guy brings up a very weird and very gross sexual fetish that he has. I left very quickly and changed my cell # so he couldn't contact me EVER!!!

Oh, C'MON! You can't leave us like this! You have to tell us what the fetish was! Did he like to lick goat's feet?

Oh, C'MON! You can't leave us like this! You have to tell us what the fetish was! Did he like to lick goat's feet?

OK, how would anyone ever find out that licking goat hooves turns them on?

OK, how would anyone ever find out that licking goat hooves turns them on?
Well, you know... first it's simple curiosity and you try it just to see what it's like. Then you try again, and the next thing you know...

Of course, not that I would know anything about that.

Unless you shield yourself from all emotion. In which case it's the bleakest point in a persons life.
I shield myself from emotion, so it's definitely been the bleakest point so far in my life... of course, life is bleak in general, and pointless, so who cares anyway.

Oh, and did I mention that I've never gone on a date with anyone, and never will? Yeah. I'm completely surrounded by eligible, single members of both sexes, but I can't make an emotional or intellectual connection to any of them. And to me that's the whole relationship. Until I can look into someone's eyes and say, "This person will understand me for what I am and not think of me as crazy", I'll never find a relationship.

(I'm sure there are some NSers though, with such a vast community as it is. I just have to find out who they are.)

Thank you. Normally I get "egotistical fuckbag". :p :D
Lucky! ;)


Compared to some of the things I'm called, at least....

I've never been on a date. It's not that I'm ugly or uninterested or some other undesirable trait. There just isn't anybody worth dating out here in the middle of nowhere. :headbang:
It's funny, either you have some kind of problem despite there being a number of members of <insert your preferred sex here> in your approximate area, or you don't have any problems but there's no one you like. (I have a compound of these. I have all kinds of problems none of you really want to know about, and there's no one around here I could ever think of relationship-wise.)

Since I'm 11, I'm not exactly a canidate for this but I will tell you a funny story about my mom dating with my dad.
So they had a date and started argueing about politics, (Mom is a Democratic Liberal Atheist and Dad is a Republican Conservative Catholic) and she got really mad at him. (This was in college). So she went over to the place he was staying and she got in because she said she was his girlfriend, and then she went up to the room and was going to rip up his curtains and stuff only she saw his dog and didn't want to scare her. SO she played with the dog a bit and then she opened his laptop and deleted everything on it, he came back a little later and had to redo every single thing on it, took him months. :D

Since I'm 11, I'm not exactly a canidate for this but I will tell you a funny story about my mom dating with my dad.
So they had a date and started argueing about politics, (Mom is a Democratic Liberal Atheist and Dad is a Republican Conservative Catholic) and she got really mad at him. (This was in college). So she went over to the place he was staying and she got in because she said she was his girlfriend, and then she went up to the room and was going to rip up his curtains and stuff only she saw his dog and didn't want to scare her. SO she played with the dog a bit and then she opened his laptop and deleted everything on it, he came back a little later and had to redo every single thing on it, took him months. :D

Kid, your mum is a nasty bitch and your dad is a spineless pushover too desperate to get his end away to tell her to get lost.

But in a nice way.

My worst date was a swedish kind of version of the senior prom. My date forced me to dance with a different girl, whom I cannot stand. Ten seconds, that's how long we danced...

Coincidentally, this was also the best date I've ever been on. And the first. And the most recent...

Kid, your mum is a nasty bitch and your dad is a spineless pushover too desperate to get his end away to tell her to get lost.

But in a nice way.
Yeah, I was imagining his parents sex life revolving around his mum in knee high leather boots and his dad in a leather mask being whipped and forced to "LICK MY STOCKINGS BITCH!".

Ah yes, nothing is more traumatic then thinking about your parents have sex. Except other people describing your parents having KINKY sex....

My worst date was a swedish kind of version of the senior prom. My date forced me to dance with a different girl, whom I cannot stand. Ten seconds, that's how long we danced...

Coincidentally, this was also the best date I've ever been on. And the first. And the most recent...

Are you male or female?

Yeah, I was imagining his parents sex life revolving around his mum in knee high leather boots and his dad in a leather mask being whipped and forced to "LICK MY STOCKINGS BITCH!".

Ah yes, nothing is more traumatic then thinking about your parents have sex. Except other people describing your parents having KINKY sex....

Or watching your parents have kinky sex :eek:

Or watching your parents have kinky sex :eek:
Especially in the porno video you just bought! :eek:

Or watching your parents have kinky sex :eek:
Fortunately, I always try to go to sleep before they start. :D

Especially in the porno video you just bought! :eek:

And then...

OMG! IS THAT GRANDMA! NO DAD! GET OFF HER!

Few months ago, really cool girl, personalities the same, she was hot, then when i finnaly got her to go to bed with me, well...... found out something




























































































SHES A GUY!
TRUE STORY!

This is not really a date-story, but it is close enough, I think.

I was at my Junior High graduation dance (I was in ninth grade), and doing my darndest to impress this girl I liked. Things were going alright, we were both having a good time. Then, however, this other gal I knew, a seventh grader, came up to me and asked if I was there with anyone. Being honest to a fault, I had to confess that technically I was not there with anyone else. The second girl grabs onto my arm in a flash declaring "alright then, you're with me!" and that was pretty much that as far as impressing chick #1 went.

SHES A GUY!
TRUE STORY!

So, lets assume the smell is from elsewhere, and you're telling the truth. Please elaborate. When you say that she's a guy, do you mean she was in drag the whole time? Or is she mid sex change? Or what? Details, please?

Oh, and are you a guy?

...My hood has never had any holes or patches. My claws are always clean and manicured, because they're made of pure steel. I know a few jokes, but in combination with my whisper of a voice they sound very sinister, and when I say 'hi' to most females, they scream and run away (so do most males btw, unless they're carrying a gun, in which case they try to shoot me, then when they see the bullets bouncing off scream and run away....) Anyway, the only time I've ever made a member of the opposite sex was when I made a nice picture for my mother, just before stabbing her in the back as she bent down to look at it. :(

Why you're worst off than me.

This is not really a date-story, but it is close enough, I think.

I was at my Junior High graduation dance (I was in ninth grade), and doing my darndest to impress this girl I liked. Things were going alright, we were both having a good time. Then, however, this other gal I knew, a seventh grader, came up to me and asked if I was there with anyone. Being honest to a fault, I had to confess that technically I was not there with anyone else. The second girl grabs onto my arm in a flash declaring "alright then, you're with me!" and that was pretty much that as far as impressing chick #1 went.

Smooth like a mirror there, brains. :rolleyes:

Why you're worst off than me.
I'm worse off than anyone as far as dating is concerned, except for infants, corpses, and 60+ year olds.

Well, I'm 13, not a looker, small for my age (so I look like a 10 year old) have a crap personality, most people hate me crap, poor, white. Hmm, I have a real good chance for dating :headbang:

You're only 13, don't worry about dating yet. Most people don't even date at 13, it might seem like it , but most people don't.

If you're 17 and never been on a date like me than you're a loser.

I'm worse off than anyone as far as dating is concerned, except for infants, corpses, and 60+ year olds.

I actually have a chance this year because I switched schools. However, I'm really shy, but when I open up, I say stupid things and evil things.

my second gf in 6th grade, i'm in 7th right now, this girl was so f**king obsessed with me, and I decided to give her a chance because I didn't know her and I don't like to hurt people's feelings. Basically, I didn't like her much
So I went out with her and it became my own personal controvery because all my friends thought I was stupid of going out with her, and a lot of people made fun of me
we went out for, about, three-four days and the school dance was coming up on a Friday, she talked to me about it via note, and I started wanting to break with her before the dance
I did and I made a good descision, besides I couldn't stand everyone talking to me about it, and I couldn't stand her being too obsessed with me (I don't know why she was, I'm pretty much a moderate (ugly, as everyone calls me) guy who's been out with three girls, including my current relationship,)
I know I will never go out with a girl who I barely even know or just can't stand ever again!

(but my current relationship is GOING GREAT!)

What's the point of dating in the 7th grade? You will probably not get laid.

If you're 17 and never been on a date like me than you're a loser.

Why does that make you a loser?

I don't think it does. Just different. And besides, most dates at 17 don't go anywhere.

I'm worse off than anyone as far as dating is concerned, except for infants, corpses, and 60+ year olds.

You think you have it bad...Try dating the 60+ year old corpses of infants!

I actually have a chance this year because I switched schools. However, I'm really shy, but when I open up, I say stupid things and evil things.

Laugh. Girls love a laugher.

But not a Mwahahaha laugh. More of a hehehe laugh. And smile when you do it.

Naked stuff is sure to follow.

Unless you have man-boobs, in which case you're bollocksed as far as the nakedness goes. Might get some tongue action, though.

You think you have it bad...Try dating the 60+ year old corpses of infants!
I don't have a chance with them either. They never talk to me...

Laugh. Girls love a laugher.

But not a Mwahahaha laugh. More of a hehehe laugh. And smile when you do it.

Naked stuff is sure to follow.

Unless you have man-boobs, in which case you're bollocksed as far as the nakedness goes. Might get some tongue action, though.

Ya, but I wanna date like a 6.5+. I'm about a 3 or so.

I don't have a chance with them either. They never talk to me...

Go for someone less attractive than you.

If you're 17 and never been on a date like me than you're a loser.

Hey, I did not go on my first date untill I was halfway through 20. I went solo to every one of my school dances to, so no girls there either.

Btw, I am not a loser, its called good self-restraint!

I actually have a chance this year because I switched schools. However, I'm really shy, but when I open up, I say stupid things and evil things.
The only people I might have a chance with live in Ireland, North Dakota, and Kansas... And they might just be playing around with me... :(

Ah well. Block emotions and they can't hurt you, that's what I always say! ;)

Go for someone less attractive than you.
That kind of person doesn't exist. And if any ever did, they've either committed suicide or are not interested in me.

Besides, I like quality in my victims...er...I mean relationships. Yeah, relationships. ;)

That kind of person doesn't exist. And if any ever did, they've either committed suicide or are not interested in me.

Besides, I like quality in my victims...er...I mean relationships. Yeah, relationships. ;)

Ouch. I'm bad looking, but not that bad looking.

We should call you "god's child" because only God can save you.

Ya, but I wanna date like a 6.5+. I'm about a 3 or so.

Aim lower. If you think you're a three, you won't even be able to get a three.

Failing resignation, get confidence, stupid!

Either that or rohypnol.

Ouch. I'm bad looking, but not that bad looking.

We should call you "god's child" because only God can save you.
What if you don't believe in God?

For example, like me.

First of all, being Master of the Gods, I happen to know there is no 'God' that you speak of. Second of all, I just don't believe in these weird Khovanic forces. ;)

Ya, but I wanna date like a 6.5+. I'm about a 3 or so.
How do you know you're a 3? Did you post your pic in hotornot.com?
Besides, it's been known to happen.

How do you know you're a 3? Did you post your pic in hotornot.com?
Besides, it's been known to happen.

Do people actually post their own pictures for shit like that?

Do people actually post their own pictures for shit like that?
Yup. I'm a 6.8, apparently.

Yup. I'm a 6.8, apparently.

I see.

Perhaps I should have added ugly to that last post.

I'd probably rate myself around a 4.5, but that's before you factor in personality, lack of experience, lack of interest, hereditary insanity, STDs, and the length of... well, you know. ;)

Laugh. Girls love a laugher.

But not a Mwahahaha laugh. More of a hehehe laugh. And smile when you do it.

Naked stuff is sure to follow.

Unless you have man-boobs, in which case you're bollocksed as far as the nakedness goes. Might get some tongue action, though.

crap... ahh well, back into the hole I go

How do you know you're a 3? Did you post your pic in hotornot.com?
Besides, it's been known to happen.

I might be above a three.

I look like Kyle from Road Trip. You know the guy that fucked the fat black woman.

I see.

Perhaps I should have added ugly to that last post.
There are very few people who are stunningly beautiful. Those people are lucky. The rest of us have to know our strengths and weaknesses and how to take advantage of what we have.

Personally, I can't complain about my dating life. I have no problems meeting and talking to beautiful girls, and have dated 9s and 10s. Heck! I've even rejected 9s and 10s!

I'd probably rate myself around a 4.5, but that's before you factor in personality, lack of experience, lack of interest, hereditary insanity, STDs, and the length of... well, you know. ;)

I might be more than a 4.5.

I have big ears, big nose ( not like a jew more like a nose that had been injured), no pimples( pooped pimples), straight hair, but I have very straight teeth and a good smile.

There are very few people who are stunningly beautiful. Those people are lucky. The rest of us have to know our strengths and weaknesses and how to take advantage of what we have.

Personally, I can't complain about my dating life. I have no problems meeting and talking to beautiful girls, and have dated 9s and 10s. Heck! I've even rejected 9s and 10s!

you wanker... rejecting 9's and 10's?

i dont think i need to say anything more

I've never really had a bad date

The only one that comes to find, is my senior prom date and I went, solely because, her school didn’t have a prom, and I needed a date, so I took her. (We were co-workers at the time)

It went fine for us, but, she like, totally, fell in love with one of my friends...so, technically, I was still dateless for the I've never really had a bad date

The only one that comes to find, is my senior prom date and I went, solely because, her school didn’t have a prom, and I needed a date, so I took her. (We were co-workers at the time)

It went fine for us, but, she like, totally, fell in love with one of my friends...so, technically, I was still dateless for the evening

Course, their relationship lasted...oh.... 5 days...so, im not bitter.

See, now, that wasn’t even that bad...

Course, their relationship lasted...oh....5 days...so, im not bitter.

See, now, that wasn’t even that bad...

What if you don't believe in God?

For example, like me.

First of all, being Master of the Gods, I happen to know there is no 'God' that you speak of. Second of all, I just don't believe in these weird Khovanic forces. ;)

The way you described yourself, you better start believing in God if you want any hope.

God Child is a term used for hopeless people that can only be saved by God, you seem to fit the profile.

Went to a seafood resturaunt and this weird dude next to us was playing with those mini-lobster things (I donno what they're called) and kept using his voice as their inner-monologues, saying things like "don't eat me, nooo!", etc. and then ripping their bodies apart and eating them. I didn't like the girl very much at all either.

I might be more than a 4.5.

I have big ears, big nose ( not like a jew more like a nose that had been injured), no pimples( pooped pimples), straight hair, but I have very straight teeth and a good smile.
I'm fairly normal looking when it comes to that. Dark and either very short and bristly (after haircut) or very tangled, tousled, and impossible to sort out (before haircut) hair; brown eyes; medium-sized ears; a large nose; glasses (transition lenses...whatever they're called); not very good teeth; a smile I never show; bushy, fairly annoying and nearly connected eyebrows; I stand a little over 5'8"; do not have "man-boobs"; am extremely thin; have fairly light skin; long legs, but not gangling; I can't really be described as ugly, but hardly good-looking in any way.

Like I said, I think the problem's with personality. I don't know of too many girls who'd like to go out with someone who has been known to flog and torture people who annoy him, throw chairs at teachers as early as 6, and never speaks, not even when spoken to. When I do speak, my voice is so cold and full of mordancy that everyone thinks I'm either weird, or scary. In addition, my combination of bushy eyebrows and deep-set eyes gives me a look of shadow for some reason, especially when I'm not wearing my glasses.

The way you described yourself, you better start believing in God if you want any hope.

God Child is a term used for hopeless people that can only be saved by God, you seem to fit the profile.
I no longer need hope, sorry.

I have chosen my path and it is evil.

The only answer is the destruction of humanity and the corrupt society that has ostracized me. Single-handedly, if I must, I will bring down the dying machine that is America, and the world, meanwhile quitting myself of all emotion, feeling, or regret. Then I can rise myself, and rule it....

Forgot to mention

very thin, 5'10-5'11 ( i grew recently), look younger than age, and shoe size does not match body.

I no longer need hope, sorry.

I have chosen my path and it is evil.

The only answer is the destruction of humanity and the corrupt society that has ostracized me. Single-handedly, if I must, I will bring down the dying machine that is America, and the world, meanwhile quitting myself of all emotion, feeling, or regret. Then I can rise myself, and rule it....

Don't you wanna change?

You can build yourself up, even if your future is serial killer.

Don't you wanna change?

You can build yourself up, even if your future is serial killer.
My future is not to be a serial killer. I intend to destroy the institutions that have imprisoned mankind -- government, police, media. I will bring them down not through death or killing, but through strategy and cunning. Then, when they are free of authority, I can start my own and rule over humanity.

My future is not to be a serial killer. I intend to destroy the institutions that have imprisoned mankind -- government, police, media. I will bring them down not through death or killing, but through strategy and cunning. Then, when they are free of authority, I can start my own and rule over humanity.

America isn't that bad. Believe it or not, I don't mind having a retard as a president.

Make a realistic future like becoming a dentist or something.

America isn't that bad. Believe it or not, I don't mind having a retard as a president.

Make a realistic future like becoming a dentist or something.
I can try to imagine myself as a dentist lol....

Me: Now this won't hurt a bit.
*pulls out 1 tooth really hard*
Other person: OWWWW!
Me: *grins fiendishly* Now will you pay me $50 extra, or not? Will YOU?!
*pulls out 2 more teeth*

Or a doctor...

Me: I know, let's give him some of this!
Nurse: Wait, isn't that slow-action strychnine?
Me: Of course.
Nurse: But that'll kill him...
Me: He'll die anyway, this just makes it take longer, and more fun.

Or a psychologist...

Patient: So what's wrong with me?
Me: You have an inferiority complex. Go home and do something to make yourself feel better, like <really graphic description of sex involving several household appliances and only one person>. Then <insert name of fatal thing that causes a lot of suffering> and believe me, you'll feel a lot better.

I can try to imagine myself as a dentist lol....

Me: Now this won't hurt a bit.
*pulls out 1 tooth really hard*
Other person: OWWWW!
Me: *grins fiendishly* Now will you pay me $50 extra, or not? Will YOU?!
*pulls out 2 more teeth*

Or a doctor...

Me: I know, let's give him some of this!
Nurse: Wait, isn't that slow-action strychnine?
Me: Of course.
Nurse: But that'll kill him...
Me: He'll die anyway, this just makes it take longer, and more fun.

Or a psychologist...

Patient: So what's wrong with me?
Me: You have an inferiority complex. Go home and do something to make yourself feel better, like <really graphic description of sex involving several household appliances and only one person>. Then <insert name of fatal thing that causes a lot of suffering> and believe me, you'll feel a lot better.

What do you want to do with your life besides your unrealistic fantasy?

Oh, C'MON! You can't leave us like this! You have to tell us what the fetish was! Did he like to lick goat's feet?
I posted it in another thred before. I don't really remember what he called it but I have since found out that the techinical term for it is felching when he first said it being as naive as I am I had no idea what he was talking about so he explained to me in great detail.
It really creeped me out (still does).

I thought that I saw him in Walmart once and I just left my basket there and went back home, I was so scared that I would run into him and have to speak to him again.

What do you want to do with your life besides your unrealistic fantasy?
Besides destroying humanity and causing pain and suffering among a race that actually deserves it, instead of all those poor animals?

Either I'll decide to do something about society and join Amnesty, PETA, etc. and get elected to a public office which I will promptly abolish, or I won't (far more likely) and live the rest of my life as a lonely, reclusive outcast.

Ha, I've been on exactly two...And they were total, miserable disasters. I was so incredibly terrified that I babbled endlessly on random topics, and had little idea of what to do. Of course, it didn't help that my date was similiarly inexperienced.

To top it off, I was feeling incredibly guilty over the whole thing, because, as some of you may know, I'm incredibly anti-sex and anti-love, so I was going against my better judgement.

Ha, I've been on exactly two...And they were total, miserable disasters.
One of the reasons why I want nothing to do with any relationships. ANY. Unless someone succeeds in, er, convincing me otherwise. ;)

One of the reasons why I want nothing to do with any relationships. ANY. Unless someone succeeds in, er, convincing me otherwise. ;)

You could get laid.

I posted it in another thred before. I don't really remember what he called it but I have since found out that the techinical term for it is felching when he first said it being as naive as I am I had no idea what he was talking about so he explained to me in great detail.
It really creeped me out (still does).

Maybe he started as an initiation ritual.

You could get laid.
No-one would do the service though.

One of the reasons why I want nothing to do with any relationships. ANY. Unless someone succeeds in, er, convincing me otherwise. ;)
See, but that's the thing...Even IF a girl likes a guy, something about our society demands that the guy is the one doing the asking out.

Of course, that works to an anti-sexual's benefit, but I highly doubt you count yourself among our ranks.

No-one would do the service though.

It's possible, very likely.

You're too negative. No one would do that service right now, sounds like you're in high school now. When you leave high school, dont be so negative, you can change. I believe in you Shawn, yes I named you Shawn.

Just be different. It's good that you have relized that you're a mess. Now say " the time is now, I'm the one" out loud. Live your life differently, if u dont like yourself, make your self different, better. I know you can get laid Shawn.

You can do it, I believe in you.

No-one would do the service though.
From my experiences in Eastern Europe, the "service" doesn't actually cost much...(Note: By "experiences" I mean I was solicited; I would never partake!)...unless you get AIDS.

It's possible, very likely.

You're too negative. No one would do that service right now, sounds like you're in high school now. When you leave high school, dont be so negative, you can change. I believe in you Shawn, yes I named you Shawn.

Just be different. It's good that you have relized that you're a mess. Now say " the time is now, I'm the one" out loud. Live your life differently, if u dont like yourself, make your self different, better. I know you can get laid Shawn.

You can do it, I believe in you.
With the state of morality in the US, I'd have to say I agree with you. Seems like someone has to reach MY levels of obnoxiousness, idiocy, and ugliness to avoid getting laid.

From my experiences in Eastern Europe, the "service" doesn't actually cost much...(Note: By "experiences" I mean I was solicited; I would never partake!)...unless you get AIDS.
Which is why you use protection. Duh!

With the state of morality in the US, I'd have to say I agree with you. Seems like someone has to reach MY levels of obnoxiousness, idiocy, and ugliness to avoid getting laid.

he is thinking about relationships, not whores. Anyone can do a whore.

he is thinking about relationships, not whores. Anyone can do a whore.

A eunuch can't. Except oral, but what would be the point in that?

he is thinking about relationships, not whores. Anyone can do a whore.
Not me. Don't have the will (anti-sexual, after all) nor money!

Well...As relationships go, then it's going to be a lot harder than you described. They are such a complicated, nonsensical, and non-beneficial game, which is why I do not partake.

It's possible, very likely.

You're too negative. No one would do that service right now, sounds like you're in high school now. When you leave high school, dont be so negative, you can change. I believe in you Shawn, yes I named you Shawn.

Just be different. It's good that you have relized that you're a mess. Now say " the time is now, I'm the one" out loud. Live your life differently, if u dont like yourself, make your self different, better. I know you can get laid Shawn.

You can do it, I believe in you.
This is my final year of high school.

My name isn't Shawn, and I want to know what kind of back-references it has before taking it on.

And I definitely don't want to get involved with prostitution. I hardly care about the sex anyway. It just isn't important to me, at least that much.

This is my final year of high school.

My name isn't Shawn, and I want to know what kind of back-references it has before taking it on.

And I definitely don't want to get involved with prostitution. I hardly care about the sex anyway. It just isn't important to me, at least that much.
Yes! Finally someone who agrees! Well...to a degree. It's progress, progress I say! (Goes off ranting about the glory of anti-sexuality...)

And I definitely don't want to get involved with prostitution. I hardly care about the sex anyway. It just isn't important to me, at least that much.

Noooo!!!!!

It's not that I wouldn't do it if, by some miracle or divine intervention, I found a relationship. It's just that I don't consider it the most important part of the relationship. You can have one without it. Heck, I've lived without it for 16 years, can it really be such a big deal? ;)

It's not that I wouldn't do it if, by some miracle or divine intervention, I found a relationship. It's just that I don't consider it the most important part of the relationship.

That's better. I'm going to call off the repo men who are coming for your testicles. Unless they turned their phones off. You might want to run away, actually.

That's better. I'm going to call off the repo men who are coming for your testicles. Unless they turned their phones off. You might want to run away, actually.
...



.....





.......






:rolleyes:

I know how to defend myself...

...



.....





.......






:rolleyes:

I know how to defend myself...

They're repo men. They're fat,loud, angry, and probably drunk. They have clipboards. CLIPBOARDS! You think you can defend yourself against that, maybe I won't call them off.

Look, do you know how thick the human skull is?

...If not, I think it's about 3 1/2 inches thick.


And do you know how thick 4 1-inch boards put together are?


...I don't need to answer that.

Factor in my six swords, my assault rifle, and my algometer, and I'll be fine. But call them off in any case, unless you really want to find their <part of body deleted> hanging outside your window next morning when you wake up.

Look, do you know how thick the human skull is?

...If not, I think it's about 3 1/2 inches thick.


And do you know how thick 4 1-inch boards put together are?


...I don't need to answer that.

But bone is far stronger than wood. Far, far stronger. Plus, don't forget the shock absorbing power of fat.

Factor in my six swords, my assault rifle, and my algometer, and I'll be fine.

Six swords but only two arms.

And no clipboards.

Repo men1-0Czardas

<snip> and shoe size does not match body.
You know what they say...

What?

Few months ago, really cool girl, personalities the same, she was hot, then when i finnaly got her to go to bed with me, well...... found out something
SHES A GUY!
TRUE STORY!
Aww. You poor guy, and you really wished it was a woman didn't you? Better luck next time buddy.

You know what they say...
Ice cream has no bones?

What?
Big feet..........


Big.......











....Shoes AND PENIS!!!! Yup.

Ice cream has no bones?
That's a damn dirty lie and you know it!

Big feet..........


Big.......











....Shoes AND PENIS!!!! Yup.
I have awesome big bug smashing shoes for the win.

That's a damn dirty lie and you know it!
That's right. It could be fried chicken ice cream.

Look, do you know how thick the human skull is?

...If not, I think it's about 3 1/2 inches thick.

Hate to burst your bubble, but you'd be surprised. I don't have exact figures on me, but I definitely learned this in a psych class, and I'm pretty sure it was in the general area of half a centimeter thick. If not less...

OK, this is a little long, but if you'll bear with it, you'll see that no one has had a worse date than this:

Setup: In 1981 I was a 21 year old college student in Arkansas when my parents moved to Natchez, MS. I came home for the x-mas holidays for my first real visit to Natchez since my folks had moved there. My dad was preacher in one of the local churches. While home for the holidays, I was expected to participate in (and I did) the church's youth activities, which included, one night, going out christmas caroling. Somehow or other, I ended up with this extremely pretty girl (her age comes later in this story, but at the time I assumed, for various reasons, it was 18) sitting in my lap in the car as we went from house to house that night. There was a little "touchy-feely" by both of us as she "squirmed" around trying to "get comfortable" in my lap that night. I learned her name was Sue and got her number to call and ask her out.

What Happened: The next day I called Sue and asked her out. She agreed and that evening I went over to her house to pick her up. I met her parents (never a good idea on a first date) and as we left, she told me I had to have her home by midnight - not a problem. As we were driving away from her house, I asked her which movie she'd like to see and if she would rather eat and then go to a show or go to a show and then eat - this is when it got weird. She said, with a "titter and a giggle" We don't have to go to a show or dinner if you don't want. How about just some wine on the Levee (i.e. the levee that overlooks the Mississippi River). That sounded kind of interesting to me, so we went to a liquor store and went in and she picked out a bottle of Boones Farm "Tickle Pink" (I should have know what was coming then) and some Austi Spumanti. She then asked me to take her to her friend's house, the twins, Sherry and Mary for a minute. When we got there, all she did was show off that she had "booze." Oh-Oh, I still didn't get how bad it was going to be.

We left the twins' house and drove up onto the levee where I had a few drinks and she chugged the Tickle Pink. Within 15-20 minutes, it was all gone and she wanted more. We left the levee and went back to the store and bought another bottle of cheap shit (don't recall what) and then went straight back to the levee. I had a few more drinks while she chugged the Austi Spumanti and more cheap wine crap. One thing led to another and we're making out and I'm on 2nd base with my hand about to touch 3rd when out of the blue she starts crying and says she is "being unfair to her boyfriend."

I'm like, "what boyfriend, what are you talking about?" She proceeds to name a guy I've met (who seemed like a decent guy) and begs me to take her to his house so she can break up with him, then we'll "come back and finish this." Well, I've figured out now, she is totally whacked out and plastered. I told her I would NOT take her to her boyfriends' house, but I would take her back to the twins' house. She is totally wasted and I sense bad shit coming down the pike if I don't get out of here and into a public venue. She agrees and we start to drive.

We've driven about 1/2 mile and she asks to stop because she has to pee. I tell her wait until we get to the twins' house and she says she can't, she is about to wet her pants. So stop. She opens the door to the car, steps out, lets go of the door and instantly falls down and begins rolling down the levee headed to the river. I'm thinking OMFG!!! I jump out of the car and run around and down the levee and find her at the bottom of the levee in the grass crying about how ashamed she is that she can't even stand up. I walk her up to the car where she says she still need to pee and I say "go for it" and she says she needs help because she is drunk and can't stand up (Duuuuhhh!!!). Next thing I know, I'm sitting on the rear bumper of my car with my legs spread. She is standing in front of me. She undoes her pants and has me help pull them down and suddenly there is cute, tight, little ass staring me in the face. She then squats between my legs, placing an arm on each of my knees to keep herself from falling over, and proceeds to pee on the road. That is when things got really weird.

As she is peeing while squatted between my legs and I'm wondering about what I should do with the drunk, cute girl who has just dropper her drawers in front of me, I looked down the road on the levee and what did I see: An old man shining his flashlight in our direction as he walked towards us. I whispered "hurry up, someone's coming" and she giggled the reply (I'll NEVER forget this) "let him get a little thrill." As the man got closer, I saw he held the flashlight in one hand and a shotgun in the other and was leading a coon hound. As he walked by, not 5 feet from me, he said "Good evening" and I said, "Hi". not another word was spoken between us, but I can only imagine him when he got home - "Martha, you'll never guess what I saw on the levee tonight!!" (imaginations take it from there).

Anyway, Sue finished peeing and I decided enough was enough. I helped her pull her pants back up and walked her back around to the passenger seat of the car. We then left and went to the twin's house.

When we got there, we knocked on the door and Mary let us in. She said her mom was gone, but to come on in cause Sue looked like she needed to get sober. I told her "damn straight." She took Sue to the back of the house where her sister was and told me to go in the den with her brother and his friends and "smoke a joint with them" while they "sobered Sue up." My ears perked up at that and I let them take Sue while I went back to my car and grabbed the gram of hash I had stashed out there. I went into the den and met Sherry and Mary's brother and his 2 friends and we chatted for a bit about what was going on and then went out in the back yard and laced 2 doobies with my hash and got completely stoned. What stands out most at this point is the time. I picked Sue up at 6:30 pm and it was 7:45 pm when I started getting high.

Well, I hung there and watched MTV until 11:50 pm. At some point Sue barfed all over herself and the twins washed and dried her clothes. I didn't see her again until 11:50 when it was time to take her home. They walked her to my car (she was still plastered, wired on coffee, but still wasted) and put her in. As we left the driveway, she said her pants were too tight and she couldn't breathe - I feared a barf fest in my car and told her to unbutton her jeans, that would help. She said "that's a good idea" and reached down and unbuttoned and unzipped her jeans, leaned back and said "thanks, that feels better." There was NO sexual intent AT ALL on my part at this point. I just wanted this night to be over.

I got her to her house, which was all dark, and she asked me to "carry me in, I don't think I can walk." I refused, but did offer to walk her in and to her room. We were as quiet as could be, but not quiet enough. As we were walking down the hall towards her room (the door on the left in the middle of the hall), the door at the end of the hall opened and the hall was flooded with light from her parent's room. Her dad walked out, looked at us, and before anyone could blink, Sue said (again, I'll never forget this moment as long as I live) "Oh Fuck!! and she reached down and began to zip up and button her jeans!!. Being quick on my feet, I looked her dad square in the eye and said "Good, I'm glad you're awake, we need to talk." About this time, mom came out into the hall as dad walked toward me.

Mom took Sue into Sue's room and dad, politely, ushered me to the Den. We sat down, and I told dad everything that had happened that night (well, everything except the 2nd trip to the liquor store, the make out and cop a feel session before that trip and the peeing episode on the levee) and assured him I had not behaved "improperly" with his daughter (i.e. that I hadn't screwed her). I told him to call the twins and they could verify we had been at there house from 7:45 on and apologized for letting her get so drunk. It was then he hit me with the bombshell - Sue was only 16. I almost had a cow. Right then, mom walked in, told us Sue was in bed asleep and asked me what had happened. Dad made me repeat the entire story to mom while he listened carefully and asked some questions, looking to find a lie or an inconsistency with what I had already told him. Telling the truth and nothing but the truth (though not the whole truth) saved my ass I do believe.

Now, this is where the story gets sad. I didn't see or speak to Sue for 3 more days. The next time I saw her was at a church function where she showed up with a black eye. She told everyone she had fallen, but she told me her dad had "beat the shit out of me" for "embarrassing him the way I did." I apologized profusely and asked if there was anything I could do and she told me no, but that we shouldn't go out anymore as it was only asking for trouble. I gave her my phone number in Arkansas at college and told her to call anytime she wanted. I didn't see or speak to her again for 2 years.

2 years later, I'm a college grad living in Natchez, MS. and a new bar opens and Jerry Lee Lewis is the feature act for the grand opening (One hell of a live show!!!!). I'm sitting at the bar and I look over at a table and there is Sue, all alone. I walk over and sit down next to her and say "Hi Sue, how are you? Do you remember me?" She says "Get the fuck away from me and do it NOW!" I was shocked, but stood up and said "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to disturb you, I just wanted to know how you were." She said "I said go the fuck away!" So I left, went back to the bar where some dude said "shot down, huh?" and I was drunk enough and pissed enough to say, "She's just mad cause she got drunk and fucked me and her old man beat her ass because of it. Go get her drunk and she'll fuck you too though - it's what she does best!" I freely admit that was a terrible thing to say about Sue and I regret it more than many things in my life to this day. I didn't see or here anything about her again for 7 more years.

7 years later, I'm about to graduate from Grad school and I go to a student gathering at a local pool hall and am talking to some people who had been through my program a few years earlier and they mentioned a small town in Arkansas they came from. I told them that the only person I knew of from there was Sue's grandmother (she had discussed with me while out Christmas Carloing before our "date" her grandmother in this small town in Arkansas and her close relationship with her). I named the grandmother and gave them Sue's full name. They looked at each other and then said "that's tooo weird that you know them." I asked how so and they explained that they knew who Sue and her grandmother were (small town Arkansas you know) and that Sue had been living with her grandmother for several years and had reported her dad for being physically abusisve, but that in the week or two before, the grandmother had died of natural causes and within a day or two, Sue had been found dead of an overdose of Valium and alcohol (ruled accidental). I went home that night and cried.

I've not heard anything else since that day or really thought too much about it since then. But now, 15+ years later, I find myself envisioning Sue and thinking about the worst date I ever had and how it turns out that maybe, no matter how bad it was for me, it was even worse for her.

The above is absolutely true with only a few name changes to protect the still living and innocent. Forgive me if it's too "heavy" but it was time to tell the story.

-snip-
You just can’t make that shit up. I do believe that that is the worst date I’ve ever heard of in my entire life, barring those that end in rape or something of course.

You just can’t make that shit up. I do believe that that is the worst date I’ve ever heard of in my entire life, barring those that end in rape or something of course.

true. thanks. The sad thing is that it's funny until you find out what happened after the date was over.

What is your worst date ever? And why?
Mine was in the eigth grade. I went with this guy to a dance, and not only did I find out he was cheating on his girlfriend with me, her friends beat up my date!
Needless to say, I haven't talked to him since.

Okay, here's mine. I went on a blind date with this guy who my friends thought I would be a good match with. We went to dinner, nothing fancy. During dinner I commented on his numerous tattoos. He proceeded to take up the rest of our date discussing how all 11 of his tattoos except one he were homemade while he was in prison, and how to take apart a walkman and turn it into a homemade tattoo gun. If I was into tattoos and ex-cons, the date would have been great, but I am into neither. :)

I don't date much, if at all. Reason being is I'm pretty good with girls on social everyday levels and very comfortable talking with them, but I REALLY am not comfortable or reasonably adept in the transitional period from friend to boyfriend.

I'm smart and have a huge mindset in principles and ideals, because of that I tend to spend a lot of my time thinking about things I need to do to improve my life so one day I will have more to offer women. (working on saving enough for a home of my own on 10x2 acres of land I already own.) I have a lot of focus on that and I REALLY can't figure out if women are single and intrested in me, would be intrested in me, or already with someone. I also like being able to have a lot of freedom to hang out with my friends on my days off and spend money as I like.

I also immediately cancel out any intrest if I see a girl on a cellphone. I immediately think she is talking with her significant other.

~snip~

:( :eek:


I do believe that takes the grand prize.