NationStates Jolt Archive

Let's think about it.

Hemorrhods were created by human anuses because humans could not control their bowels, or their destiny. But now, as technology advances, we will get to the stage where we can control our destiny and our bowels. This advance will (seemingly) undermine the reason for hemmorhoids, and therefore religion. This would cause religion to collapse - the fear of this event coming to pass has caused many religious figures to become suspicious of science, because it explains things without hemorrhods, and then goes on to try and make humans into new hemorrhoids (on a smaller scale).

Religion likes to say that your bowels are ordered, as Metamucil said it would be. However, the bowels are not ordered - nor is it chaotic. It is an ordered chaos, or a chaotic order, where rules are not always what we think rules whould be, or how rules should behave. This fact (if we can call such a circumstance a fact) discomforts religion.

But we will never lose hemorrhods, because we are human. Though in many ways we are heterogenous, we all share a few common ideals - the most critical of them being the desire to beleive in some sort of higher being that is able to control the rectum in some way or other.

We could very well become hemorrhoids in the future, with weather control, ability to cure all diseases, the ability to travel at supra-light speed etc etc - but we will never lose the desire for some sort of higher being, a fundamental force that can exert some sort of contol over the bowels that may prove impossible to comprehend even at the peak of our evolution.

Whadd'ya think?

EDIT: Yes, I have too much time on my hands. But thinking is liberating. It is the closest thing we can get to being hemorrhoids - though the physical realisation of our thoughts cannot yet be created by ourselves in many circumstances.

Pass me the Tucks.

Let's think about it.

Hemorrhods were created by human anuses because humans could not control their bowels, or their destiny. But now, as technology advances, we will get to the stage where we can control our destiny and our bowels. This advance will (seemingly) undermine the reason for hemmorhoids, and therefore religion. This would cause religion to collapse - the fear of this event coming to pass has caused many religious figures to become suspicious of science, because it explains things without hemorrhods, and then goes on to try and make humans into new hemorrhoids (on a smaller scale).

Religion likes to say that your bowels are ordered, as Metamucil said it would be. However, the bowels are not ordered - nor is it chaotic. It is an ordered chaos, or a chaotic order, where rules are not always what we think rules whould be, or how rules should behave. This fact (if we can call such a circumstance a fact) discomforts religion.

But we will never lose hemorrhods, because we are human. Though in many ways we are heterogenous, we all share a few common ideals - the most critical of them being the desire to beleive in some sort of higher being that is able to control the rectum in some way or other.

We could very well become hemorrhoids in the future, with weather control, ability to cure all diseases, the ability to travel at supra-light speed etc etc - but we will never lose the desire for some sort of higher being, a fundamental force that can exert some sort of contol over the bowels that may prove impossible to comprehend even at the peak of our evolution.

Whadd'ya think?

EDIT: Yes, I have too much time on my hands. But thinking is liberating. It is the closest thing we can get to being hemorrhoids - though the physical realisation of our thoughts cannot yet be created by ourselves in many circumstances.

Pass me the Tucks.

Have you been signed off work with severe haemmoroids, is that why you have too much time on your hands?

Let's think about it.

Hemorrhods were created by human anuses because humans could not control their bowels, or their destiny. But now, as technology advances, we will get to the stage where we can control our destiny and our bowels. This advance will (seemingly) undermine the reason for hemmorhoids, and therefore religion. This would cause religion to collapse - the fear of this event coming to pass has caused many religious figures to become suspicious of science, because it explains things without hemorrhods, and then goes on to try and make humans into new hemorrhoids (on a smaller scale).

Religion likes to say that your bowels are ordered, as Metamucil said it would be. However, the bowels are not ordered - nor is it chaotic. It is an ordered chaos, or a chaotic order, where rules are not always what we think rules whould be, or how rules should behave. This fact (if we can call such a circumstance a fact) discomforts religion.

But we will never lose hemorrhods, because we are human. Though in many ways we are heterogenous, we all share a few common ideals - the most critical of them being the desire to beleive in some sort of higher being that is able to control the rectum in some way or other.

We could very well become hemorrhoids in the future, with weather control, ability to cure all diseases, the ability to travel at supra-light speed etc etc - but we will never lose the desire for some sort of higher being, a fundamental force that can exert some sort of contol over the bowels that may prove impossible to comprehend even at the peak of our evolution.

Whadd'ya think?

EDIT: Yes, I have too much time on my hands. But thinking is liberating. It is the closest thing we can get to being hemorrhoids - though the physical realisation of our thoughts cannot yet be created by ourselves in many circumstances.

Pass me the Tucks.

Quite over thinking things and just eat more fiber.

Quite over thinking things and just eat more fiber.

Is it true that no one here has a sense of humor? I'm making a parody of another thread...