Death
Im sorry, this is the last thread Ill make for a while..
My aunt just died on thursday. When my mom told me.. I reacted in the least emotional way.. ever. I was in the shower and my mom says "gram just called.. your aunt died" and all i could think was "oh well" and I just didnt react the way I think I should have.
My aunt was just treated for cancer and shes been suffering. To me, if someones suffering and they die, its ok.. to me thats not a sad situation.
I know my nana is going to be next, her health is going down hill fast. She has diabetis and heart problems. She went into surgery to get a vein moved from her leg to her chest(i think). A few days/weeks later they found out they took the wrong vein, so they had to amputate her leg. She recently had a heart attack, followed by a liver infection. She went from living in an assisted living thing to a nursing home. (which I hate. They depress the fuck outta me.)
Well I feel like Im going to react the same way to her death. Death in particular, to me, doesnt effect me untill the funeral. After the day of the funeral Im back to regular life. I dont know why..
I've seen shows on tv about how different countries view death. They said "Americans fear death", doesnt every one? How do you view/feel about death?
I've encountered several deaths of people very close to me. I also reacted fairly emotionlessly, if it's any consolation. Either they were old and suffering, or they deserved to die anyway.... (j/k) ... But I consider death just another thing that's going to happen, and considering how life is crap, death can't be too much worse. For one thing, there aren't any other people around to screw with your life.
Antikythera
03-10-2005, 05:28
i have not had to deal wiht a lot of deaths but i think taht i would react the same way that you did..death does not really bother me
Ngaio United
03-10-2005, 05:33
Death is a part of life, it's got to happen. It's sad but on the bright side everyone is going to go through it!!!
Im sorry, this is the last thread Ill make for a while..
My aunt just died on thursday. When my mom told me.. I reacted in the least emotional way.. ever. I was in the shower and my mom says "gram just called.. your aunt died" and all i could think was "oh well" and I just didnt react the way I think I should have.
My aunt was just treated for cancer and shes been suffering. To me, if someones suffering and they die, its ok.. to me thats not a sad situation.
I know my nana is going to be next, her health is going down hill fast. She has diabetis and heart problems. She went into surgery to get a vein moved from her leg to her chest(i think). A few days/weeks later they found out they took the wrong vein, so they had to amputate her leg. She recently had a heart attack, followed by a liver infection. She went from living in an assisted living thing to a nursing home. (which I hate. They depress the fuck outta me.)
Well I feel like Im going to react the same way to her death. Death in particular, to me, doesnt effect me untill the funeral. After the day of the funeral Im back to regular life. I dont know why..
I've seen shows on tv about how different countries view death. They said "Americans fear death", doesnt every one? How do you view/feel about death?
I for one do not believe that death is the end. Something -I can't say what exactly- tells me that there is something else beyond our mortal existance.
You seem to have a very secure grasp with death. You see it as a natural, and inevitable occurance. But when you are in pain over ones death, it is important to let it out, otherwise it'll just eat away at you. Everyone mourns in thier own way, you just may not express it quite as outwardly as others.
Slaughtered Sheep
03-10-2005, 06:57
I can kind of relate, my grandmother died a little under a year ago. I was pretty close to her (first grandchild), but her death just didn't bother me much. The thing that bothered me most was the reactions of my mother and other members of my family. My overriding reaction was something like "and you weren't expecting this because...?" Maybe it's just because I don't really get riled up about much other than blatant idiocy (not flamebait, just a comment). I will say this though; at least they're not stuck here anymore.
The first response to death and the grieving process is denial. It's only natural to not feel emotion about it at first. Every person reacts differently ... in fact, every situation is different. For example, it took me over two years to come to grips with the fact that my friends were killed by a drunk driver. However, when my grandmother passed, I know it was over when I was at her funeral. Don't be surprised if the emotions hit you later.
To answer your question about the fear of death: No, not everyone fears death. I'm one who doesn't. I've accepted it will happen and when it does, it does. I don't fear it. However, most people do. Some reasons include a) the premature interruption of life activities (who wants to die in the midst of the most important project of their lives?); b) effects of death upon family members, classmates and friends (this is one of the reasons that keeps people from commiting suicide: "What will it do to my family?"); c) the fear of death without dignity, for example, being kept alive by machine; d) the fear of nothingness after death (hence the reason religions were created).
Don't worry! What you're feeling is natural and the fact that you question it means you're totally fine. You'll get through it :)
Pure Metal
03-10-2005, 10:41
i'm sorry to hear for your loss, really :(
i never like hearing bad news like this on these forums
but....
I've encountered several deaths of people very close to me. I also reacted fairly emotionlessly, if it's any consolation.
... ditto, if it matters. i've seen 3 close schoolfriends die in the last 3 or 4 years, and i've hardly reacted at all, even at the funerals. if you don't react the 'normal' way (though what is normal anyway?) then just put it behind you and get on with life - you're lucky you can compared to some. just mourn or miss your aunt in your own way, thats what matters
Kjata Major
03-10-2005, 10:43
Death is a part of life, it's got to happen. It's sad but on the bright side everyone is going to go through it!!!
So true, but its unavoidable and the reason its so sad is cause we have no control over it and its a loss.