NationStates Jolt Archive

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-I'm just one man, what can Ido?
-If I didn't do it, some one else would've...
-It's God's will.
-I was only following orders.
-I got a note from my mum...
-Yeah, but it'll help the economy!!
-Oh, wake up, pal. Everyone's guilty or immoral on some level, if you look hard enough...

i did it for the lulz — Adolf "Buddy" Hitler

-well, that's the way we've always done it!
-I didn't know!
-It's the first time I've ever done anything like this!

-I was only following orders.
.

You missed this one's constant companion: "I never did any of those things myself". Between 'em, this dynamic duo can exonerate both the people who came up with the idea and the people who agreed to carry it out.

- having good intentions.

The sun was in my eyes.

The sun was in my eyes.

Yeah Hitler used that one to explain the Holocaust, too

-Other people have done worse things.
-Anyone would done the same thing in my situation.
-I had to do it, for the sake of my country.

- He started it.
- Everyone else is doing it.

- He started it.
- Everyone else is doing it.

I can just imagine these excuses to justify the Holocaust...Hee-hee, neo-nazis are idiots. :D

Yeah Hitler used that one to explain the Holocaust, too

:confused:

But he did it first!

-It was them or me.
-I was forced too.
-You'd have done the same
-What? I did something wrong?
-You say it's wrong, but in other circles.
-You can't judge me.
-You can't handle the truth.
-The needs of the many you know.
-Worse things would have happened had I not acted.
-I did it to save the world.

- It's instinct. If you've got a problem with it, blame the primordial soup.
- Your Karma told me to do it.
- What? I'm the comic relief; that's my job.
- Sorry, my disorderly-behavioural-medication sometimes has the aftereffect of making me behave in a slightly disorderly manner.

-The ouija board told me to do it. (this one has actually been used in court)

-My twin brother did it.
-Uhhhh....um...LOOK BEHIND YOU, A THREE HEADED MONKEY!!

Can't remember the name, but the medical condition where you act like an automaton (http://dictionary.reference.com/search?r=2&q=automaton).

Can't remember the name, but the medical condition where you act like an automaton (http://dictionary.reference.com/search?r=2&q=automaton).

robot palsy

i said robot palsy

Eating twinkies made me do it.
It's not my fault!
The devil made me do it.

And the one I hear all the time from my students:
I duuno.

-The Voices told me it's ok
-Everyone else is just a part of my imagination, so im just hurting myself
-I thought it was a Vampire when i staked him
-There wasnt anything in the manual, saying you can't dry a cat in it
-ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US
-But... uhm... you know... they got weapons of mass destruction
-That arm will regrow anyway
-It's O.K. what i did... 'cuz I KNOW BEST
-This hurts me more than you

I didn't know it would do that.
It's your fault for writing "don't press" on it.
If it's not illegal, it's not immoral.
I'm a moral subjectivist.
I'm a nihilist.
I'm American, and your puny laws don't apply. Hahaha!
They were French, they had it coming.


Note: I'm not American, and I like the French.

-The Devil made me do it
-I didn't do it. Nobody saw me. You can't prove anything (used by Bart Simpson)
-

-They have done worse to us
-They deserved what they got

Do it for the children... :rolleyes:

- But other people did it and you didn't punish them.
- I was drunk/stoned.
- It was an accident.
- I didn't mean to.
- I thought it was a good idea at the time.
- It's all your fault.
- You made me do it.

Do it for the children... :rolleyes:
Lol. I posted something and was about to edit it and put this one in there.

Lol. I posted something and was about to edit it and put this one in there.
Yeah, but it sounds better coming from me than a Wobbly. It is, after all, a primary Liberal raison for taxation/social confiscation. :p

"It depends upon what your definition of 'is' is." Slick Willie. :D

"I was really aiming at the sergeant, but I missed."

(Attributed to an Irish soldier in the British army, at some point during the Napoleonic Wars, when he was being court-martialled for shooting a corporal...)

Yeah, but it sounds better coming from me than a Wobbly. It is, after all, a primary Liberal raison for taxation/social confiscation. :pAh, and here I was thinking it's a primary Conservative reason for censorship and the like.

I was temporarily insane

1. The ends justify the means.
2. It was the lesser of two evils.
3. Our attack on (fill in the blank) was a pre-emptive retaliatory strike.
4. You cannot make an omelette without breaking a few eggs. (Attributed to Napoleon Bonaparte and Vladimir Il'ych Lenin.)
5. One death is a tragedy; a million deaths is a statistic. (Attributed to Iosif Stalin.)

Ah, and here I was thinking it's a primary Conservative reason for censorship and the like.
Point.

But then, I'm not a "Conservative"... I'm a Libertarian. :p

-It wasn't me, it was the dog!!
-I knew I shouldn't have had those beans
-But Rambo did it and it was okay!
-You mean those weren't fake bullets ?!?!?
-They died in the name of Peace and Freedom (usually followed by a phrase including "God" and "America")

The all time, biggest, most overused, most disgusting, the ultimate granddaddy of all moral excuses is:

drumroll please....

"The end justifies the means."

It doesn't get much worse than that.

The all time, biggest, most overused, most disgusting, the ultimate granddaddy of all moral excuses is:

drumroll please....

"The end justifies the means."

It doesn't get much worse than that.
(That is both a misquote and misreading of Machaivelli btw...)

—B.F. Skinner said that freewill doesn't exist!
—Nietzsche said that the strong should rule the weak!
—Give me a minute while I look for a controversal philosopher to cite.

That is what the voters elected me to do.

it's not my responsibility

-Other people do worse things and get away with it.
-Who are you to judge me?

Probably done already but my fav is
-My finger slipped... :p

-Eutrusca did it *points*
-But look at the results
-It was nothing they wouldn't have done
-Two wrongs make it right

1. we must do something.
2. this is sometihng.
3. therefore we must do it.

and my favourite from the hutton enquiry (investigation into uk government supplying arms to iraq): "truth is a difficult concept..."

-In the end does it really even matter
-Who cares
-I was not the only one
-Can you really blame me?
-Jesus still loves me
- STOP BLOCKING MY CREATIVITY
-Is anything truly bad?
-It will never work with that attitude
-You just dont get it...
-Look at it this way

"Liberté, Egalité, Fraternité!"

"Liberté, Egalité, Fraternité!"

How's about "For King and Country," then?
Or, to fling mud at the Yanks too, "Give me liberty or give me death!"

PS: I'm a Yank, by the way.

PPS: According to Patrick o'Brian, one should always choose the lesser of two weevils.

(That is both a misquote and misreading of Machaivelli btw...)
Um, I didn't attribute that to Machiavelli, if you'd care to notice. It's a common moral "axiom" nonetheless, regardless of who spawned it and equally regardless of whether or not it was a 'misquote.' Perhaps it is, but several generations of philosophers have countenanced the idea with entire volumes of work.

-But she was hot!

Um, I didn't attribute that to Machiavelli, if you'd care to notice. It's a common moral "axiom" nonetheless, regardless of who spawned it and equally regardless of whether or not it was a 'misquote.' Perhaps it is, but several generations of philosophers have countenanced the idea with entire volumes of work.
I know (on both objections) - but it's still a pet peeve of mine. I don't understand how generations of philosophers could so thouroughly misinterpret Machiavelli when he wrote so much more than "The Prince"... which was really somthing he did largely for the purpose of avoiding being killed by his local dictator. I mean, when a Dictator (Cesar Borgia IIRC) has you under house arrest and askes you how to be a good Dictator, it sure seems that coming up with the Prince was a pretty good idea.

Once you temper The Prince with "Discourses on Livy" (which was obviously on Jefferson's reading list) you will see he was a much more adroit political philosopher than people give him credit.

"Machiavelli's other major work, Discourses on the First Ten Books of Titus Livius (1513-21), was mainly concerned with "republics," defined as states controlled by a politically active citizenry. In "Discourses" he emphasized that for a republic to survive, it needed to foster a spirit of patriotism and civic virtue among its citizens. Machiavelli argued that a republic would be strengthened by the conflicts generated through open political participation and debate." http://www.lucidcafe.com/library/96may/machiavelli.html

Other bits:
http://www.ctbw.com/lubman.htm

-Survival of the fittest, right?

Point.

But then, I'm not a "Conservative"... I'm a Libertarian. :pTrue. But I'm not a "Liberal", i'm an Anarcho-socialist. :p We believe in taxation/wealth redistribution for tons of reasons other than "for the children".

-A time traveler told me that he\she would destroy the future, I had to act.
-I was under mind control.
-They were part of (Insert evil group)
-I was at the wrong place at the wrong time.
-You may see me as evil, History will judge me a visionary. (I wouldn't be suprised if someone uses this one.)
-He stole my bike.
-She told me she was 17.
-Video game Violence made me do it.
-Television Made me do it.
-Books made me do it.
-People made me do it.
-I didn't do it.
-It was a head injury.

And the Legal one:
-I pled the 5th.

The devil made me do it is the classic one isn't it?

-You may see me as evil, History will judge me a visionary. (I wouldn't be suprised if someone uses this one.)

Sum1 did, Hilter, said it during a speech at his trial for the treason charges after he failed a military coup.