NationStates Jolt Archive


Judge with too much time on his hands

Mesatecala
21-09-2005, 23:53
This is hilarious...

http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/n/a/2005/09/20/national/a153835D50.DTL&type=printable

Jurors hearing the case against a former judge accused of exposing himself in his Creek County courtroom will be allowed to see the sex toy at the center of the state's allegations, a judge ruled Tuesday in rejecting a defense motion.

They also can hear testimony that a second "penis pump" was seen under former District Judge Donald Thompson's bench, among other evidence Thompson's attorneys sought to have barred from next week's scheduled trial.

"It's so fantastic and so unconnected to factual support, and so prejudicial," attorney Clark Brewster complained in trying to convince Judge C. Allen McCall to suppress some state evidence.

Thompson, 58, who spent more than 20 years on the bench before stepping down more than a year ago, faces three counts of indecent exposure.

Prosecutors allege he masturbated with a penis pump under his robe while presiding over two murder trials and a civil trial in 2003. Thompson denies the allegations and said the penis pump seized in the case was a gag gift from a friend.

Brewster argued that the state should be prevented from submitting the device as evidence, contending that not only did it not function but that it also was sawed in half while in the state's custody.

Prosecutor Pattye High said an Oklahoma State Bureau of Investigation chemist followed procedure in sawing the pump in two to swab it for DNA evidence. McCall denied the defense request.

The judge also refused a defense motion to prevent testimony from a courtroom reporter who said she discovered a different penis pump under the judge's bench in 2001.

Brewster said there was no evidence to link the pump to his client, but High countered that the testimony would help show "this defendant committed the same crime over and over and over again."
Legless Pirates
21-09-2005, 23:54
"Time" eh? ;)
Drunk commies deleted
21-09-2005, 23:55
Maybe he could claim that the penis enlargement pump was a medically necessary device. Can small penis syndrome be fatal?
SoWiBi
21-09-2005, 23:57
i'd say NS posters with too much time on their hands..;)
Fass
21-09-2005, 23:58
Hah! (http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/B00025DALE/104-1883683-2571153?v=glance)

I think I've found my new forum name should I ever be deleted.
Mesatecala
22-09-2005, 00:00
Hah! (http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/B00025DALE/104-1883683-2571153?v=glance)

I think I've found my new forum name should I ever be deleted.

From one of the reviews:

"Not only did it rip my testicles from my sac, but it also cleaned half of the tip of my penis off. This product is an abomination and it should not be on the market."
Fass
22-09-2005, 00:06
From one of the reviews:

"Not only did it rip my testicles from my sac, but it also cleaned half of the tip of my penis off. This product is an abomination and it should not be on the market."

Sounds like one of my exes.
Drunk commies deleted
22-09-2005, 00:08
Best pump on the planet!, June 11, 2004
Reviewer: Livewire "The Canadian Information Minister" (Inside the belly of a huge mechanical planet-eater. Please send help.) - See all my reviews
This thing worked so well than I eventually had to replace the tube with a larger one. After 2 months I was using a coffee can. Now I'm up to an oil drum. Unfortunately I frequently lose consciousness during an erection due to blood displacement from my brain.



Nice review.
Neo Kervoskia
22-09-2005, 00:20
God gave me a two inch penis. I have been made fun by numerous women and grieved almost daily. Women claimed I was homosexual because I could not get it up. I am 26, I have gone through puberty several times. And still my manhood did not mark up to standards. I tried the "SWEDISH PENIS PUMP ENLARGER PISTOL TRIGGER" and WHAMO! You have given me a new hope!

That's so inspirational.
Mesatecala
22-09-2005, 00:23
God gave me a two inch penis. I have been made fun by numerous women and grieved almost daily. Women claimed I was homosexual because I could not get it up. I am 26, I have gone through puberty several times. And still my manhood did not mark up to standards. I tried the "SWEDISH PENIS PUMP ENLARGER PISTOL TRIGGER" and WHAMO! You have given me a new hope!

That's so inspirational.

I read that the rest of it too.. he later claimed he now has 9 inches... hahahahah...
H N Fiddlebottoms VIII
22-09-2005, 00:27
From one of the reviews:

"Not only did it rip my testicles from my sac, but it also cleaned half of the tip of my penis off. This product is an abomination and it should not be on the market."
That was the greatest review that I have ever seen, for anything. Especially when you consider that (apparently) extreme genital mutilation isn't quite as inconvenient as I had imagined, the pump still got 2 stars I think, and then he ends it with "Hi Mom!"
Because what mother doesn't want to read about her son castrating himself with the Hoover?
Neo Kervoskia
22-09-2005, 00:30
That was the greatest review that I have ever seen, for anything. Especially when you consider that (apparently) extreme genital mutilation isn't quite as inconvenient as I had imagined, the pump still got 2 stars I think, and then he ends it with "Hi Mom!"
Because what mother doesn't want to read about her son castrating himself with the Hoover?
That'd make a fuck of a Hallmark card.