NationStates Jolt Archive

post here:

funny signatures
funny quotes
funny comments

Just think of Family Guy and come up with your favorite episodes.

74% of all statistics are made up on the spot.

Willy. hehehe

Everywhere but here (which for some reason won't let me use it in my signature), I use:

http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b383/DrkHelmet/SeizeTheMoment.jpg

Everywhere but here (which for some reason won't let me use it in my signature), I use:

That reason being that pic sigs are fucking annoying, not to mention take up too much space and bandwidth.

I kind of like the Abraham Lincoln quote "Whatever you are, be a good one!"

That reason being that pic sigs are fucking annoying, not to mention take up too much space and bandwidth.

aye-though the pic is quite amusing...way too much space is taken by it

Well it's not funny, but I like it. Nother by Lincoln.

"Allow the president to invade a neighboring nation, whenever he shall deem it necessary to repel an invasion, and you allow him to do so whenever he may choose to say he deems it necessary for such a purpose - and you allow him to make war at pleasure."

bum.
poo.
front bottoms.

Nostalgia, gotta love it.

What about Winston Churchill's long running feud with Lady Astor?
LA: Winston, if you were my husband I'd put posion in your coffee.
WC: If you were my wife, I'd drink it!
OR
LA: Winston, you're drunk!
WC: True, but you, madam, are ugly. In the morining I shall be sober, you shall still be ugly!

The benchmark of humerous quotes: The Simpsons!

Homer: Marge? Since I'm not talking to Lisa, would you please ask her to pass me the syrup?
Marge: Dear, please pass your father the syrup, Lisa.
Lisa: Bart, tell Dad I will only pass the syrup if it won't be used on any meat product.
Bart: You dunkin' your sausages in that syrup homeboy?
Homer: Marge, tell Bart I just want to drink a nice glass of syrup like I do every morning.
Marge: Tell him yourself, you're ignoring Lisa, not Bart.
Homer: Bart, thank your mother for pointing that out.
Marge: Homer, you're not not-talking to me and secondly I heard what you said.
Homer: Lisa, tell your mother to get off my case.
Bart: Uhhh, dad, Lisa's the one you're not talking to.
Homer: Bart, go to your room.

Grandpa: My Homer is not a communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a communist, but he is not a porn star.

Homer: [drunk] Look, the thing about my family is there's five of us. Marge, Bart, Girl Bart, the one who doesn't talk, and the fat guy. How I loathe him.

Homer: How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive?

Grandpa: Dear Mr. President, There are too many states nowadays. Please eliminate three.
P.S. I am not a crackpot.

Homer: Here's to alcohol, the cause of—and solution to—all life's problems.

Homer: Lisa, would you like a donut?
Lisa: No thanks. Do you have any fruit?
Homer: This has purple in it. Purple is a fruit.

And of course:

Homer: Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.

I always thought my sig,though true, was still funny.

Facists don't think "hmmm this mixture of socialism, capitalism combined with an authoritarian system intregues me," they think "I hate niggers. Who'll help me?"

hehehehehe :D

(\_/)
(O.o)
(> <)
This is Rabbit. Copy Rabbit to your signature and help Rabbit to world dominance!

I expect everyone to have that in all there sigs tomorrow

Homer: Lisa, would you like a donut?
Lisa: No thanks. Do you have any fruit?
Homer: This has purple in it. Purple is a fruit.
Haha, I love that one.

'Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.'-Mark Twain

(\_/)
(O.o)
(> <)
This is Rabbit. Copy Rabbit to your signature and help Rabbit to world dominance!

I expect everyone to have that in all there sigs tomorrow
lol i like rabbit... would put him in my sig but i'm up against the line limit as it is :(

I don't see any sigs

http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:JbNgCQjDHrcJ:www.faculty.english.ttu.edu/mcfadden/signature.jpg

I don't believe in signatures. ;)

On all the cool interweb zones I visit I use

http://img160.imageshack.us/img160/6849/faz9jb.png

It's not really funny, but that's how life is sometimes.

"When you are having trouble getting others to believe in what you say, just attach the name of someone famous at the end."
- Amadeus Wolfgang Mozart

Mine. Though Kat's sig scares me a little, mostly in the pants...

Everywhere but here (which for some reason won't let me use it in my signature), I use:

http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b383/DrkHelmet/SeizeTheMoment.jpg

Why carpe diem when you can carpe jugulum? That's one of my motto's. My other is "Look down the road." *wonders if anyone will get the reference*

Anyway, I think my sig is pretty good.

lead me to the rock that is higher than I. its not funny, but its insightful

oh, is this the thrwoing around cheap wisdoms thread? cool, i wanna join.

no, i haven't failed. i just found 100 ways that don't work. (now, whoever is the quickest to find who said that gets a cookie).

i once used this as email sig

I forget which nations' sig this was in:
"Give a man a fire & he'll be warm for a day. Set him on fire & he'll be warm for life."

I also rather enjoy:
"Pray to God; but, keep rowing away from the rocks!"

oh, is this the thrwoing around cheap wisdoms thread? cool, i wanna join.

no, i haven't failed. i just found 100 ways that don't work. (now, whoever is the quickest to find who said that gets a cookie).

i once used this as email sig
Thomas Edison :D

In a World gone mad only the craziest are insane.

It's better to have loved and lost than to be robbed, beaten, and left for dead in a muddy ditch. :D

Why carpe diem when you can carpe jugulum?

Or, better yet, carpe pudendum.

Ooooh, Latin!

Nunc est Bibendum

"Now, I've done a bit of Latin in my time, but I can control it. Never let it get out of hand. You know, two or three translations a week--never more! With friends, casual. Sometimes you just go to parties... you're upstairs in the room with the coats, and everyone's speaking Latin." - Eddie Izzard

Nunc est Bibendum



:D :D

Ooooh, Latin!

Nunc est Bibendum
Best Latin phrase ever :D

Not a sig, but it's what I want on my gravestone.
Obesa Cantavit - the fat lady has sung. :p
could someone tell me how Nunc is pronounced? is it nunk?

Thomas Edison

i herewith award the nietzscherian quote cookie to Sick Nightmares. congrats :


oh, and allthenames.. as long a sthe fat lady sings the opera's not ended yet :D (i oughta stop doing german insiders, but you know..can't resist temptation when she really wants you..)

i herewith award the nietzscherian quote cookie to Sick Nightmares. congrats :


oh, and allthenames.. as long a sthe fat lady sings the opera's not ended yet :D (i oughta stop doing german insiders, but you know..can't resist temptation when she really wants you..)
lol.... well, yeah, exactly. It ain't over till the fat lady sings, and then on your gravestone, put 'the fat lady has sung.' I think it's pretty funny. I also want to play Queen's "another one bites the dust' at my funeral, too.

Originally posted by Xenophobialand
Why carpe diem when you can carpe jugulum? That's one of my motto's. My other is "Look down the road." *wonders if anyone will get the reference*

I believe I'm right in saying that Carpe Jugulum is from the Terry Pratchett book of the same name, and the look down the road one is also Pratchett isn't it? Can't remember which one.

As for all the Latin stuff - morituri nolumus mori is clearly the best.

Incidentally what does that nunc est bibendum one mean?

I believe I'm right in saying that Carpe Jugulum is from the Terry Pratchett book of the same name, and the look down the road one is also Pratchett isn't it? Can't remember which one.

As for all the Latin stuff - morituri nolumus mori is clearly the best.

Incidentally what does that nunc est bibendum one mean?
Now is the time to drink.

Sweet

Put memberships to clubs that don't really exist in your sig. Hours of fun to be had there.

Oh that, or a variation on the bunny theme. I went for Zombie Bunneh - the fountain of wisdom and rotten bunneh flesh.

98% of teens have tried pot. If you're part of the 2% who hasn't, post this in your signature.

I find that funny.

I find that funny.I think you're the only one on the planet that does, then.

I like Kervoskia's sig.

I think you're the only one on the planet that does, then.

I'm the only person on the planet who thinks bullshit is funny? Woah.

"If You Think Sex Is A Pain In The Ass, You're Doing It Wrong!"

I forget exactly how it went, but it was like this:

This post may contain traces peanuts or nut byproducts. Read with caution

Ok... maybe it's not THAT funny, but when i read it i laughed for like 10 mins then I put it on my door at rez.

98% of teens have tried pot. If you're part of the 2% who hasn't, post this in your signature.

I find that funny.

I don't really find it as funny as most, because it's generally spelled wrong ('hav,' 'duz', 'ur,' 'hasnt,' etc.), so I put a variant of it in my Deviantart signature:

"98% of teens does or has tried smoking pot. I'm one of the 2% that hasn't, but I prefer to type like I haven't, just to prove it."

Also "I may not know where you live, but I know damn sure you're not getting into my buddy list." makes me chuckle.