NationStates Jolt Archive

Yesterday I watched The OC (more precisely: O.C., California as it is called in Germany) and one thing really made me laugh: The parents of one of the main characters (Seth Cohen) where not ok with his sleeping at his girlfriends home, though he seems to be something like 18/19.
Moreover I remember I zapped to The OC when there was something about the first sex and Seth Cohen didnt know anything about foreplay.
Is it really like that in America?
That would perfectly fit the stereotype we (Germans) have of uptight Americans.

Take it from someone who lives just across the hills from Orange County.

The OC is completely freakin' fake. It's just stereotypes about Californian life. It's all crap.

The OC (show) is dumb. Most people I know are nowhere near that uptight, but alot of Americans are uptight super religious loons, I'm glad I'm not one of them

It really depends on where you live. Where I live we have what I'd call a "mature" grasp of sexuality. We're open about it, but we're not snarky about it, like giggling every time we hear the word "penis".

In short, we ain't repressed over here in New England.

PS: Don't base anything on "The OC". That show sucks more than Courtney Love.

The OC (show) is dumb.

I like it. Only good soap ever. Somehow always in a good mood after watchng it.

[QUOTE=Bolol]. We're open about it, but we're not snarky about it, like giggling every time we hear the word "penis".
QUOTE]
Oh come on. Surely the word "penis" is funny in any number of situations?

PS: Don't base anything on "The OC".
Well that was not the first time I heard strage things about Amerca and sexuality (abstinence, parents not allowing exchange student to go to cinema if girls are present (calling every single parent of the ones who went with him to cinema to make sure)(!))

I think we're stumbling across the old Red State/Blue State thing here, aren't we?

[QUOTE=Bolol]. We're open about it, but we're not snarky about it, like giggling every time we hear the word "penis".
QUOTE]
Oh come on. Surely the word "penis" is funny in any number of situations?
What about a good humored "Penis!" if your boss asks you to be on time next time?

*puts down electrified nipple clamps and vibrating tongue cover, hobbles over to the computer and has Vivica take off the handcuffs*

I'm not sure about Americans being uptight about sex, but here in Northen Ontario people seem pretty casual about it...

[QUOTE=Bolol]. We're open about it, but we're not snarky about it, like giggling every time we hear the word "penis".
QUOTE]
Oh come on. Surely the word "penis" is funny in any number of situations?
R-O-T-F-L-M-A-O
STOPPIT!
<pant> <pant> <cough> <gasp>
YOUR KILLING ME!
:D

Oh come on. Surely the word "penis" is funny in any number of situations?

I'm not saying there isn't, seen it plenty of times. But if it's in a serious situation, we don't joke about it.

Yesterday I watched The OC (more precisely: O.C., California as it is called in Germany) and one thing really made me laugh: The parents of one of the main characters (Seth Cohen) where not ok with his sleeping at his girlfriends home, though he seems to be something like 18/19.
Moreover I remember I zapped to The OC when there was something about the first sex and Seth Cohen didnt know anything about foreplay.
Is it really like that in America?
That would perfectly fit the stereotype we (Germans) have of uptight Americans.


Yep..we HATE sex. Just kidding. While we may not be happy that our children are being promiscuous ((um Aids, etc. and all the other happy crappy)) we for the most part try not to interfere in our children's lives too much. The only thing we can do is tell them our ideas and values and hope that they have the same. At this age it is definitely their own decision, but if its at her parent's house that is another story...I wouldnt allow that at my home unless married or perhaps engaged.

Yesterday I watched The OC (more precisely: O.C., California as it is called in Germany) and one thing really made me laugh: The parents of one of the main characters (Seth Cohen) where not ok with his sleeping at his girlfriends home, though he seems to be something like 18/19.
Moreover I remember I zapped to The OC when there was something about the first sex and Seth Cohen didnt know anything about foreplay.
Is it really like that in America?
That would perfectly fit the stereotype we (Germans) have of uptight Americans.

Two things. First, as was previously said in this thread, the OC is nothing like life in Orange County... or anywhere else in America that I'm aware of. I find their characterization of life in Orange insulting to my intellegence and I can't watch the show because the lives of the characters are so preposterous.

Secondly, you're asking if parents here will get upset if their 18/19 year old fornicates. For the majority of America, the answer is yes.

That show sucks more than Courtney Love.


:p

Yesterday I watched The OC (more precisely: O.C., California as it is called in Germany)...Verräter :D

What about a good humored "Penis!" if your boss asks you to be on time next time?

Personally I think yelling "vagina" might be funnier, but...mkay...

I sincerely loathe religious influences which make us ashamed of our sexual natures. Fuck Whitey McGee and his fucking bullshit doctrines. Fuck the Republicans for defending "moral decency" and screwing up childrens' minds. Fuck Christianity in a secular government. We don't want you! As soon as I can get an assistanship I'll be sure to go to a graduate school in a different country and teach there. Any ideas on a good secular country to go to? I'm tired of religious zealotry... the Christian extremists are no better than their Muslim counterparts in my mind. There's something to be said of worldly ignorance in that it doesn't look good on anyone.

I like it. Only good soap ever. Somehow always in a good mood after watchng it."Good soap?" What's wrong with you? I suppose you watch GZSZ too, you sick freak :p

I wouldnt allow that at my home unless married or perhaps engaged.

Not? Maybe I am wrong, but I guess in Germany nearly no parents would object to a boyfriend/girlfriend sleeping in their son's/daughter's bed. (At least from a certain age (about 16) onwards.
My parent only always told me to use a condom. :)

Secondly, you're asking if parents here will get upset if their 18/19 year old fornicates. For the majority of America, the answer is yes.Na, Tluiko? Da haste deine Antwort. :D

"Good soap?" What's wrong with you? I suppose you watch GZSZ too, you sick freak :p

Oh no! Its the only soap I watch. And I think all those German (daily) soaps have bad stories + bad actor + take themselves much too serious.

Not? Maybe I am wrong, but I guess in Germany nearly no parents would object to a boyfriend/girlfriend sleeping in their son's/daughter's bed. (At least from a certain age (about 16) onwards.
My parent only always told me to use a condom. :)Are you kidding? I know families in Germany that have their sons make sure the girls don't even talk to boys too long. (Of course, these are all Turkish...)
Seriously now, there's bound to be a couple Spießer-dads that can't let their daughters be "violated".

I live in a rather conservative state, but don't hold that against me. I have never heard of any parent making sure there weren't girls in the movie theartre their son went to. (someone mentioned that earlier) I have heard of many instances of people 15 or 16 sleeping over at their boyfriends/girlfriends houses, but not in the same bed. They probably could have done something secretly but the parents wouldn't approve of that sort of behavior. Generally, parents who find out about a child's active sexual activity out here will get a severe scolding and probably get grounded, but we aren't talking about sending them to an all male or female school to get them away from the opposite sex. Americans aren't all crazily uptight or sleeping with every person in sight, you would find most of us are in the middle somewhere.

Secondly, you're asking if parents here will get upset if their 18/19 year old fornicates. For the majority of America, the answer is yes.

Sleeping with his girlfriend == fornication??

Oh no! Its the only soap I watch. And I think all those German (daily) soaps have bad stories + bad actor + take themselves much too serious.I've had OC: California explained to me as something like Beverly Hills 90210, only not as bad... didn't really change my mind.
It's a pity you need to watch American soaps at least once and memorize what the main characters look like because they don't have that same type of cheap looking picture the German ones have...

Yesterday I watched The OC (more precisely: O.C., California as it is called in Germany) and one thing really made me laugh: The parents of one of the main characters (Seth Cohen) where not ok with his sleeping at his girlfriends home, though he seems to be something like 18/19.
Moreover I remember I zapped to The OC when there was something about the first sex and Seth Cohen didnt know anything about foreplay.
Is it really like that in America?
That would perfectly fit the stereotype we (Germans) have of uptight Americans.
It's inherently dangerous to allow television, or anything out of Hollywierd, to be your primary source of information about anything, especially America. The folks in Hollywierd have NO idea what America is all about, living as they do in their own little insular, inbred world. Broaden your horizons and seek out other sources of information about America and disregard almost everything Hollywierd has to say.

It's inherently dangerous to allow television, or anything out of Hollywierd, to be your primary source of information about anything, especially America. The folks in Hollywierd have NO idea what America is all about, living as they do in their own little insular, inbred world. Broaden your horizons and seek out other sources of information about America and disregard almost everything Hollywierd has to say.Such as the testimonies of exchange students he mentioned? :D

Such as the testimonies of exchange students he mentioned? :D
Thank you. Not to mention the whole abstinence-only stuff, which definitely was not Hollywood-made.

Not? Maybe I am wrong, but I guess in Germany nearly no parents would object to a boyfriend/girlfriend sleeping in their son's/daughter's bed. (At least from a certain age (about 16) onwards.
My parent only always told me to use a condom. :)


It depends on the area of the US you live in as well. I live deep in the bible belt. lower Alabama so yeah...I would be considered more of a liberal here...my late husband would probably say HELL no he aint sleeping with my daughter and in MY house too..... and then beat the crap out of him.... this is redneck country...more old fashioned values. But I cant stop them but they can go to a hotel or do like we did ....go parking! ;)

Such as the testimonies of exchange students he mentioned? :D

Thank you. Not to mention the whole abstinence-only stuff, which definitely was not Hollywood-made.

Perhaps it was because I was responding to the first post in the thread? Ya think??? :rolleyes:

Perhaps it was because I was responding to the first post in the thread? Ya think??? :rolleyes:You mean 2 pages of thread are too much to read before posting?

Do you foreigners like ANYTHING about the U.S.A.??
This is about the 20th post putting down America that I've seen here. :mad:

Do you foreigners like ANYTHING about the U.S.A.??
This is about the 20th post putting down America that I've seen here. :mad:What?

Plain and simple question.

Plain and simple question.Plain and simple thread but you missed the point anyway...

Is it really like that in America?
That would perfectly fit the stereotype we (Germans) have of uptight Americans.


We are uptight because we dont want your teenage kids sleeping around?
GET REAL!!

We are uptight because we dont want your teenage kids sleeping around?
GET REAL!!He's asking about it and, as an American, preventing (not necessarily not wanting) your kids from sleeping around is "uptight". In the end, it's how you raise your children, but after 14, they're youths.

So your saying preventing your teenager from sleeping around is uptight?

If so you dont know the first thing about raising a teen.
If a boy puts his hands on my daughter before he is married to her he WILL answer to ME!!

That isnt uptight that is being a responsable parent. Read the bible.
At that age they are not thinking about STD's, AIDS or even pregnancy.

So your saying preventing your teenager from sleeping around is uptight?

If so you dont know the first thing about raising a teen.
If a boy puts his hands on my daughter before he is married to her he WILL answer to ME!!

That isnt uptight that is the way it should be. Read the bible. I wont raise a slut.Are you calling my sister a slut? That's considered offensive, btw. Please keep your views to yourself. Not everyone needs a bible. It's not sleeping around that makes anyone a slut, it's how you deal with it.

Wrong!!

So let the poster and you keep your views of Americans to yourselves.

That show is even more fake than the real Orange County. Of course a show showing real California life wouldn't be very interesting....

Main character goes to work, is 15 minutes late because of traffic before he says screw it because there's no way he'll be able to work enough to pay rent, takes forty minutes longer comming home because traffic is worse, goes to McDonalds but can't order anything because everyone working there only speaks Spanish. On the next episode gas prices go up again, and on the one after that he looses his job to an illegal immigrant. The series ends on the forth episode when a fire burns down his house and he says screw it and goes to a more liveable state xp

I just read the line you added to your post. Speaking as a former teenager, if the parents teach them about it, yes they do think about it.

In the heat of the moment most are thinking of one thing only.

In the heat of the moment most are thinking of one thing only.Do you speak from experience? If "most" teenagers thought that way, then countries that are not so "uptight" would be having far more teenage pregnancies. This is not the case.

It's not sleeping around that makes anyone a slut, it's how you deal with it.

um...I'm pretty sure a slut is someone who sleeps around...regardless...

That show is even more fake than the real Orange County. Of course a show showing real California life wouldn't be very interesting....

Main character goes to work, is 15 minutes late because of traffic before he says screw it because there's no way he'll be able to work enough to pay rent, takes forty minutes longer comming home because traffic is worse, goes to McDonalds but can't order anything because everyone working there only speaks Spanish. On the next episode gas prices go up again, and on the one after that he looses his job to an illegal immigrant. The series ends on the forth episode when a fire burns down his house and he says screw it and goes to a more liveable state xp
Actually a mudslide blocks the freeway so he'll have to walk. But that's when the wind comes and keeps him from going any further. And that's when it suddenly gets dry and wildfires seperate him from Nevada and Arizona. :D

All within an hour, amazingly.

Do you speak from experience? If "most" teenagers thought that way, then countries that are not so "uptight" would be having far more teenage pregnancies. This is not the case.

This "uptight" shit is nonsense.

It's the difference between america and europe. In america, violence is everywhere yet sex is taboo. In europe sex is everywhere yet violence is taboo. It's just how the societies differ. Neither is more or less "uptight".

Actually a mudslide blocks the freeway so he'll have to walk. But that's when the wind comes and keeps him from going any further. And that's when it suddenly gets dry and wildfires seperate him from Nevada and Arizona. :D

All within an hour, amazingly.

Depends on the time of year, but I do believe you're right XD

Yesterday I watched The OC (more precisely: O.C., California as it is called in Germany) and one thing really made me laugh: The parents of one of the main characters (Seth Cohen) where not ok with his sleeping at his girlfriends home, though he seems to be something like 18/19.
Moreover I remember I zapped to The OC when there was something about the first sex and Seth Cohen didnt know anything about foreplay.
Is it really like that in America?
That would perfectly fit the stereotype we (Germans) have of uptight Americans.The OC is very, very fake, and does not represent what real life in the US is like.

However, the average American holds very stupid, incorrect, and unhealthy attitudes about sex. Americans have, in some ways, clung to their Puritan roots, being totally obsessed with sex while simultaneously declaring sex to be the greatest and most ickiest of no-no's. Hell, we elected a president who thinks that the shape of somebody's genitals should determine who they get to marry! And then we re-elected him! We have parents campaigning to keep their children from learning how to have safe sex, and lobbying to ensure their children don't learn how their own bodies work. We have organizations that "celebrate virginity" by teaching kids, "Sex is dirty, so save it for the person you marry!"

America is a freaking STUPID country when it comes to sex.

America is a freaking STUPID country when it comes to sex.I'm glad it's not only "us foreigners" that think so. :)

seconded


hi yall

So your saying preventing your teenager from sleeping around is uptight?

If you believe there is any way to FORCE your teen to not have sex, while still maintaining anything resembling a healthy relationship, you are in for a biiiiiiiiig surprise. The best way to keep your teen from having sex is to help him or her understand the truth about sex, including all the upsides and downsides, then explain your wishes honestly and non-aggressively. Tell them why you feel it is important that they CHOOSE to abstain from sex. Make it their responsibility, and respect them as you discuss the subject, and you'll have far more luck than if you threaten and rage at them about the evils of The Sex.

If so you dont know the first thing about raising a teen.

Like I said, if you think playing the little dictator will work on a teenager you're in for some ugly surprises. That's one of the best ways to make sure your kid WILL have sex at a young age. I say this not only as somebody who is helping to rear a teen boy, but also as somebody who has worked at confidential clinics in three cities. I've talked to very normal, conservative, suburban teens who come in for STD test and pregnancy tests, and your authoritarian attitude fits with the typical description of the parent of a sexually active teenager.


If a boy puts his hands on my daughter before he is married to her he WILL answer to ME!!

My parents knew they could trust me by the time I was 15, and they knew I was smart, honorable, and strong enough to decide who could touch me and when. If you feel that you have so utterly failed as a parent that you couldn't trust your teenage daughter to make her own personal choices about her body, then I can recommend several really solid parent support groups that could help you learn how to better relate to your child and your role in her life.


That isnt uptight that is being a responsable parent. Read the bible.

Yeah, I really want to take sex advice from a God that protects and supports men who get drunk and commit incest. A God that tells his followers to rape women and children. A God who impregnates a little girl so He can then use the resulting child for a blood sacrifice. There's a great book to base your parenting on.


At that age they are not thinking about STD's, AIDS or even pregnancy.
At what age, exactly? Unless your daughter is mentally disabled, or you've kept her chained in your barn for her entire life, I can promise you that she is, or will be, thinking about AIDS, STDs, and pregnancy long before she chooses to have sex. I was thinking about those things before I even hit puberty, and I wasn't a very bright child.

You seem to really care about your kid(s)' wellfare, and I think you honestly want to protect your daughter from danger. But you need to understand that your approach is not going to help her, and it might actually increase some risks for her. If you really want to put her welfare first, then put your ego on hold and start learning about what you can do to make her a strong woman who will make good choices for herself.

I'm glad it's not only "us foreigners" that think so. :)
I love my country, but we really have some annoying hangups. I get so sick of people acting like a woman becomes filthy the minute she lets a man touch her, or like men have to stick their penis in anything with boobies lest they be considered a faggot (the most horrific of insults), or like seeing a woman's naked breast when she feeds her baby is somehow going to make their eyeballs pop out and dangle onto their chest.

Hey America: GROW UP. We are not a nation composed of 6th graders. We do not need cootie shots. Kissing does not get you pregnant. They're called "penises" and "vaginas," not "wee-wees" and "hoo-hoos." Seeing a nipple will not cause you to burst into flames. Get on with your lives.

I love my country, but we really have some annoying hangups. I get so sick of people acting like a woman becomes filthy the minute she lets a man touch her, or like men have to stick their penis in anything with boobies lest they be considered a faggot (the most horrific of insults), or like seeing a woman's naked breast when she feeds her baby is somehow going to make their eyeballs pop out and dangle onto their chest.

Hey America: GROW UP. We are not a nation composed of 6th graders. We do not need cootie shots. Kissing does not get you pregnant. They're called "penises" and "vaginas," not "wee-wees" and "hoo-hoos." Seeing a nipple will not cause you to burst into flames. Get on with your lives.I love both my countries, though one slightly less than the other for political reasons. I was feeling a bit too "excited" to respond properly and I'm very appreciative that you did so the way you did. Good job.

He's asking about it and, as an American, preventing (not necessarily not wanting) your kids from sleeping around is "uptight". In the end, it's how you raise your children, but after 14, they're youths.
What does that mean? They are still minors, and their parents are still responsible for them. A parent has the natural right to tell his or her child that they can’t hang around with certain people, set a curfew, find out where their kid has been, keep them from where they don’t want them etc. When the kid turns eighteen and moves out, he can do whatever the heck he wants.

and what the hell does "after 14 they're youths" mean anyhow? Since when is 14, 15, or somewhere in between a determining factor for anything? I could see how someone would call you a child until 13, and then a teenager until 20, with 16 and 18 being important years within that spectrum, but since when do we classify 15+'s as "youths" and even if that was normal, what would the significance be?

Hey bottle if I wanted your two cent about how to raise my children I would ask for it.
You read into my post completely wrong.

Hey bottle if I wanted your two cent about how to raise my children I would ask for it.

Then it's your own fault for being too stubborn when your kids turn out to be two-cent whores.

The dictator approach to parenting ALWAYS backfires. (As does the "do whatever you please, kids" approach) Teenagers rebel naturally, and trying to restrain them only makes them rebel more.

I like it. Only good soap ever. Somehow always in a good mood after watchng it.

I think it bites.

I only watch it because of Adam Brody. *drool*

I think it bites.

I only watch it because of Adam Brody. *drool*

That's pathetic. Go watch a porno or look at a picture. Sexually repressed people like you are to blame for the shit that passes as television today.

America is a freaking STUPID country when it comes to sex.

Wrong. China is a freaking STUPID country when it comes to sex. (http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/4572859.stm) :p

Wrong. China is a freaking STUPID country when it comes to sex. (http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/4572859.stm) :p
:eek: That fricken sucks.
That's pathetic. Go watch a porno or look at a picture. Sexually repressed people like you are to blame for the shit that passes as television today.
Somebody needed to say it.
I can’t believe the crap on TV just because a bunch of teenage girls want to see thirty year old men in heavy makeup acting like teenagers.

Somebody needed to say it.
I can’t believe the crap on TV just because a bunch of teenage girls want to see thirty year old men in heavy makeup acting like teenagers.

Women who cannot see for their silicone breasts while running down a beach don't make for better TV, either. Don't blame the girls...

Yesterday I watched The OC (more precisely: O.C., California as it is called in Germany) and one thing really made me laugh: The parents of one of the main characters (Seth Cohen) where not ok with his sleeping at his girlfriends home, though he seems to be something like 18/19.
Moreover I remember I zapped to The OC when there was something about the first sex and Seth Cohen didnt know anything about foreplay.
Is it really like that in America?
That would perfectly fit the stereotype we (Germans) have of uptight Americans.

Speaking as an American, most American television shows and movies are stupid and unrealistic. Keep that in mind when watching our cinima.

Do you foreigners like ANYTHING about the U.S.A.??
This is about the 20th post putting down America that I've seen here. :mad:

It never ceases to amaze me how easily some people from the USA take offense. In what way was he putting down anything? He was asking if the picture he got from a TV series corresponded with reality.

You may want to check this (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=425693) out. :p

:sniper: :sniper: :sniper: :sniper: :sniper: :sniper: Just curious as to those that would say there intelligence has been insulted by the OC, perhaps they should be sure they can spell before using this particular word.

Amestria']Speaking as an American, most American television shows and movies are stupid and unrealistic. Keep that in mind when watching our cinima.
I like American TV series - they sure beat any German attempts on that genre. I'm a big fan especially of "Frasier", but also "Friends", "Scrubs" etc.. "Desperate Houswives" is also very good.

Obviously these series don't give out an accurate view of American society, especially in view of the fragmentation of the US society. It is funny, though, what kind of picture these serious draw:
Americans are sexually inhibited (as cited in the thread's origin, OC)
Americans are sexually liberated ("the third date"-thing that pops up in most series, the amount of partners people have in Friends and Frasier)
Americans are homophobic (Friends: the fear of the male characters to be thought gay)
Americans are open towards gay culture (Examples in "Will & Grace")
...

The funny thing is that a met quite a few Americans who embodied (some of) these stereotypes. But then you also find Bavarians in Lederhos'n in Munich :)

I enjoy these series for what they are, entertainment and try not to let them influence my picture of America too much. And the I come over and think "Wow - like on TV" :D

Laerod, du solltest vieleicht erklären, was das mit den 14-jährigen auf sich hat.

There was some confusion about the "at 14 they're youth's" thingy.
Well in Germany, a person can legally have sex at the age of 14 without commiting a crime, as opposed to i.e. Georgia, where sex under 18 is illegal. Furthermore, in some parts of Germany, especially in the east, as soon as you turn 14, it doesn't really matter, what you do, you can drink, smoke, go to bars, clubs etc. If you live in a village, turning 14 means you can do waht you want. In cities the bars and clubs are a little bit more carefull, but just a tad. Last weekend I went to a local club, and they were girls, I could swear they weren't even 16.

Thats how it is in Germany, and I know West-Germany isn't different from that, OT: too bad we still make this difference, 15 years after.

Anyway, legal drinking age is 16 for beer/ wine, rest 18, smoking is allowed at age of 16 as well. Under 18, there is a curfew, midnight.

And nobody cares about it (the law), and I'm glad its that way, I had a blast, now I'm 20, and still have a blast.

About the sex thing, I spent a year in Georgia, and I've met parents, that were worse than what was said here, and also met people who thought, that all that is just a bunch of BS.
It depends, who you talk to, if you attend a church meeting in Georgia, you will think those people in The OC are really harmless.
But then you talk to some teenagers and, boy, a whole different world.

And yes, the more uptight the parents are, the more loose are the children.

Hey bottle if I wanted your two cent about how to raise my children I would ask for it.

If you don't want people to discuss your parenting with you, you should not have brought up your parenting on a public discussion forum.


You read into my post completely wrong.
If you would like to explain what you really meant, that's fine. If I have misunderstood you then feel free to clear things up. If you just don't want to talk about it, that's fine too, and we can drop the subject.

cabra west,

I really dont care if foregin people like the U.S.A. or not. Everyone has thier own opinion and thats great. I cant say I dont like any off your countries because I have never been there and I wouldnt form an opinion on what others say or from the crappy media. If I did visit and thought it was bad I wouldnt keep posting about it OVER AND OVER. It doesnt do any good it just makes the people of that country mad and what is the sence in that? I dont think it's this country thats bad or it's people it's the damn government that sucks.

cabra west,

I really dont care if foregin people like the U.S.A. or not. Everyone has thier own opinion and thats great. I cant say I dont like any off your countries because I have never been there and I wouldnt form an opinion on what others say or from the crappy media. If I did visit and thought it was bad I wouldnt keep posting about it OVER AND OVER. It doesnt do any good it just makes the people of that country mad and what is the sence in that? I dont think it's this country thats bad or it's people it's the damn government that sucks.

Um... you must have read a completely different post than I have. I read a question, asking citizens of another nation if the image presented by their own media represents the truth, or if reality is significantly different, and if so in what respects. Seems to me that the OP was trying to get a better understanding of the situation in your country by addressing your countrymen directly rather than relying on "crappy media".

I didn't read any accusations in this thread by non-US people at all. The only ones so far who felt the need to point out issues they perceived as shortcomings were American themselves.

So, why do you feel attacked?

Though they may not know enough about sexual diseases and contraception as they should, thanks in large part to abstinance only sex ed in many parts of the country, they do have sex. Often they start sexual activity at apallingly young ages.

I listened to an old episode of the Opie and Anthony radio show yesterday and they were discussing an HBO documentary called "middle school confessions". In that show there were kids as young as 12 talking about getting drunk and performing oral sex. Unfortunately many American kids are sexually active at young ages.

If you believe there is any way to FORCE your teen to not have sex, while still maintaining anything resembling a healthy relationship, you are in for a biiiiiiiiig surprise. The best way to keep your teen from having sex is to help him or her understand the truth about sex, including all the upsides and downsides, then explain your wishes honestly and non-aggressively. Tell them why you feel it is important that they CHOOSE to abstain from sex. Make it their responsibility, and respect them as you discuss the subject, and you'll have far more luck than if you threaten and rage at them about the evils of The Sex.

Like I said, if you think playing the little dictator will work on a teenager you're in for some ugly surprises. That's one of the best ways to make sure your kid WILL have sex at a young age. I say this not only as somebody who is helping to rear a teen boy, but also as somebody who has worked at confidential clinics in three cities. I've talked to very normal, conservative, suburban teens who come in for STD test and pregnancy tests, and your authoritarian attitude fits with the typical description of the parent of a sexually active teenager.

My parents knew they could trust me by the time I was 15, and they knew I was smart, honorable, and strong enough to decide who could touch me and when. If you feel that you have so utterly failed as a parent that you couldn't trust your teenage daughter to make her own personal choices about her body, then I can recommend several really solid parent support groups that could help you learn how to better relate to your child and your role in her life.

Yeah, I really want to take sex advice from a God that protects and supports men who get drunk and commit incest. A God that tells his followers to rape women and children. A God who impregnates a little girl so He can then use the resulting child for a blood sacrifice. There's a great book to base your parenting on.

At what age, exactly? Unless your daughter is mentally disabled, or you've kept her chained in your barn for her entire life, I can promise you that she is, or will be, thinking about AIDS, STDs, and pregnancy long before she chooses to have sex. I was thinking about those things before I even hit puberty, and I wasn't a very bright child.

You seem to really care about your kid(s)' wellfare, and I think you honestly want to protect your daughter from danger. But you need to understand that your approach is not going to help her, and it might actually increase some risks for her. If you really want to put her welfare first, then put your ego on hold and start learning about what you can do to make her a strong woman who will make good choices for herself.

First off I never FORCE my kids to do anything!! Iagree with what you say here^. I also never threaten or rage at them. But there are steps you can take to TRY and prevent them from having sex at a young age.

I dont play little dictator, but a parent has the right to tell their kids what to do and what not to do. I also dont have an authoritarian attitude. But I dont think you can let your kids come and go as they please either.

I hope I can trust my kids at 15 and they know that that is to young to have anyone touching them. I have not even come close to failing as a parent and have a long way to go before I need to worry about this as my daughter is only 6 and I relate to her just FINE.

WOW you really need to actually read this book. God does nothing of the sort! Yes it's a great book to base your life and parenting on. THANK YOU!

I have no EGO I just stated what ALOT of fathers would.
A man touches my daughter wrong and he WILL pay for it.

Though they may not know enough about sexual diseases and contraception as they should, thanks in large part to abstinance only sex ed in many parts of the country, they do have sex. Often they start sexual activity at apallingly young ages.

I listened to an old episode of the Opie and Anthony radio show yesterday and they were discussing an HBO documentary called "middle school confessions". In that show there were kids as young as 12 talking about getting drunk and performing oral sex. Unfortunately many American kids are sexually active at young ages.
Why don't the abstinence crowd actually teach kids about STDs? I mean, surely that would actually help!

Our sex education is completely the opposite in Britain… how much of the US teaches abstinence in the totally useless way that it seems to be taught?

That would perfectly fit the stereotype we (Germans) have of uptight Americans.

Whats this then?
We have to be called uptight because we dont have the same beliefs as another country and we dont want our young teenaged kids to run free and have sex all day?

They just cant say: Oh thats how they do things over there and it's different then what we do and leave it at that?

Laerod, du solltest vieleicht erklären, was das mit den 14-jährigen auf sich hat.

There was some confusion about the "at 14 they're youth's" thingy.While most of the statements are correct, 14 is not the age at which one can have sex without committing a crime, it is the age at which one is legally entitled to having sex. This is because anyone under 14 is by law incapable of committing a crime. This is due to German age categories:
Under 14: Child (Kind)
14-17: Youth or Juvenile (Jugendlich)
18-20: Coming of age (Heranwachsend)
Over 21: Adult

This has a lot to do with legal matters. Children cannot legally commit crimes. Juveniles are subject to juvenile law, and adults are subject to adult law. People coming of age are judged by their maturity whether they are judged by juvenile or adult law.

That would perfectly fit the stereotype we (Germans) have of uptight Americans.

Whats this then?
We have to be called uptight because we dont have the same beliefs as another country and we dont want our young teenaged kids to run free and have sex all day?

They just cant say: Oh thats how they do things over there and it's different then what we do and leave it at that?No. We consider the thinking that teenaged kids (especially girls) will run around having sex all day if they are allowed to as well as the thinking that if they are no longer virgins, they are something shameful, "uptight". We have a problem with that here. There are plenty of Turkish immigrant families that still cling to similar ideals and actually go out and murder the daughter for such reasons. Their arguementation is no different from yours.

That would perfectly fit the stereotype we (Germans) have of uptight Americans.

Whats this then?
We have to be called uptight because we dont have the same beliefs as another country and we dont want our young teenaged kids to run free and have sex all day?

They just cant say: Oh thats how they do things over there and it's different then what we do and leave it at that?

He was trying to clarify if that stereotype was really accurate. By calling it a stereotype he actually suggested that it was NOT THE TRUTH, but rather an exaggerated image of a foreign culture. I'm more than sure there are comparable stereotypes of Germans in the USA, that's only normal.

By calling it a stereotype he actually suggested that it was NOT THE TRUTH, but rather an exaggerated image of a foreign culture

That MAY be but I took it as saying:
That is the image we germans have of americans..

Why don't the abstinence crowd actually teach kids about STDs? I mean, surely that would actually help!

Our sex education is completely the opposite in Britain… how much of the US teaches abstinence in the totally useless way that it seems to be taught?
Abstinance only models of sex ed do teach about STDs, but they only tell kids that abstinance prevents them, not that condoms can prevent many of them. I guess the idea is that if information is deliberately witheld from kids and they are told lies about the risks of sex that they'll be too frightened to have premarital sex. It apparently doesn't work.

I don't know how widespread abstinance only classes are, but they seem to go hand in hand with the religious conservative social engineering that W and the other christian conservatives espouse. I'd bet it's most common in the "bible belt" states, you know, the ones with the highest teen pregnancy rates.

Abstinance only models of sex ed do teach about STDs, but they only tell kids that abstinance prevents them, not that condoms can prevent many of them. I guess the idea is that if information is deliberately witheld from kids and they are told lies about the risks of sex that they'll be too frightened to have premarital sex. It apparently doesn't work.

I don't know how widespread abstinance only classes are, but they seem to go hand in hand with the religious conservative social engineering that W and the other christian conservatives espouse. I'd bet it's most common in the "bible belt" states, you know, the ones with the highest teen pregnancy rates.
Hmm… there are three things which can be done in this situation.

1] MORE FEAR!

2] Contraceptive education… except that doesn't really work either. Well, it doesn't here in Britain.

3] Introduce free sterilisation for teenagers. Then, you don't need to worry about teenage pregnancies, so the only problem is the diseases, which really isn't a problem. Then you stop treatment for STDs being free, except in cases of rape of course. Problem solved… I think.

Hmm… there are three things which can be done in this situation.

1] MORE FEAR!

Sure, let's traumatise our kids. And let's public health care pay for the psychatrist they will need later on in order to live halfway normal lives.


2] Contraceptive education… except that doesn't really work either. Well, it doesn't here in Britain.

Works in Germany... and Austria. And Skandinavia, as far a I know. Maybe you need to adjust somthing in the system?


3] Introduce free sterilisation for teenagers. Then, you don't need to worry about teenage pregnancies, so the only problem is the diseases, which really isn't a problem. Then you stop treatment for STDs being free, except in cases of rape of course. Problem solved… I think.

I think this may result in some very bad legal cases when those teenagers come of age... and it will drastically raise the rape stats.

By calling it a stereotype he actually suggested that it was NOT THE TRUTH, but rather an exaggerated image of a foreign culture

That MAY be but I took it as saying:
That is the image we germans have of americans..

Well actually I have to say I as a German think (and this thread backed that up) that some (as ieverywhere else) there seems to be a range of attitudes to sexuality, but this range goes from (too?) liberal to VERY uptight, whereas in Germany it goes from (too?) liberal to slightly uptight (among Germans, not among Turkish).

Whats this then?
We have to be called uptight because we dont have the same beliefs as another country and we dont want our young teenaged kids to run free and have sex all day?

They just cant say: Oh thats how they do things over there and it's different then what we do and leave it at that?
A man touches my daughter wrong and he WILL pay for it.
And you would make someone having sex with your daughter pay for that he does act according to your beliefs?

Well actually I have to say I as a German think (and this thread backed that up) that some (as ieverywhere else) there seems to be a range of attitudes to sexuality, but this range goes from (too?) liberal to VERY uptight, whereas in Germany it goes from (too?) liberal to slightly uptight (among Germans, not among Turkish).

By George I think youve got it! It is basically a values isssue to families in the US some are more liberal than others. I dont think not allowing sleeping around in my house is being uptight , its just I feel it shows me disrespect but I feel like my child is free to do as he wishes in his own home as long as it is legal. Who said that sterilization on teens would lead to more rapes? What kind of wacko thinking is that? Rape isnt about sex it is about power and control of the victim. :rolleyes: I believe in sex education with an emphasis on abstinence, yes SEX can wait you have a whole lifetime for it, you can only be a virgin once in your lifetime so dont blow it for some scumbag. I do believe we can do away with some retarded laws we have (cough sodomy cough cough) like whose business is that anyway-nice disquise for homophobic laws. Oh and to Sir Douglas about someone touching YOUR daughter ..what would you do if your son touched someone else's daughter? ((I hate this double standard)) Boys can do it but girls are sluts! :sniper:

Who said that sterilization on teens would lead to more rapes? What kind of wacko thinking is that? Rape isnt about sex it is about power and control of the victim. :rolleyes:

Nobody said that.
Please re-read the post, I said that IF medical care for STDs were to be free only in case of rape, the statistics for rape are likely to go up, as people would start claiming that they were raped in order to get medical assistance. :rolleyes:

Nobody said that.
Please re-read the post, I said that IF medical care for STDs were to be free only in case of rape, the statistics for rape are likely to go up, as people would start claiming that they were raped in order to get medical assistance. :rolleyes:
sorry misread the statement. Oh there are free clinics so there are free treatments of stds. It does help. they dont ask questions the doctors are more concerned with stopping the spread of the clap , etc.

I myself think that sex education in Germany maybe is a little too liberal, as it is always like: Use condoms and everything is alright. I myself would add:constancy isn't bad, either. Abstinence might be the safest choice, but in my opinion isn't worth it. (Like not driving with your car or taking part in traffic at all would eliminate the risk of dying in a car accident.)

Well having sex just to have sex isnt really a good idea either. Virginity is a once in a lifetime thing so I would think lose it carefully. Sleeping around casually to me cheapens the experience and makes it less enjoyable.

And you would make someone having sex with your daughter pay for that he does act according to your beliefs?

If she is under age your damn right!!
I am responsible for my daughter until she turns 18. Once she does it is her decision and I hope she has learned enough to make the right one.

If she is under age your damn right!!
I am responsible for my daughter until she turns 18. Once she does it is her decision and I hope she has learned enough to make the right one.What about your sons?

Im not a typical jackass male. The same goes for my son. He shouldnt be out sleeping around either. If he does, and I pray he knows better, he best be ready to take the responsability that comes with it. I cant stand to see young boys get a girl pregnant and then leave them. That shows a total lack of respect and a real cowered.

If she is under age your damn right!!
I am responsible for my daughter until she turns 18.

1st Before you posted something about not yet married
If a boy puts his hands on my daughter before he is married to her he WILL answer to ME!!
Ok, isn't "make him pay" here, but nevertheless sounds quite aggressive, and that just because he does not share your beliefs (I assume he does not exploit your daughter).

2nd But this does not make sleeping with your daughter a morally/legally wrong (I dunno whether it is illegal in your state) act.
Either making him pay would be illegal or vigilante justice (if he himself is 18, if he is not: wouldn't he and your daughter be equally responible?).

1st Before you posted something about not yet married

Ok, isn't "make him pay" here, but nevertheless sounds quite aggressive, and that just because he does not share your beliefs (I assume he does not exploit your daughter).

2nd But this does not make sleeping with your daughter a morally/legally wrong (I dunno whether it is illegal in your state) act.
Either making him pay would be illegal or vigilante justice (if he himself is 18, if he is not: wouldn't he and your daughter be equally responible?).

Okay a lot of the men in this country tend to be overly protective of their daughters and they start puffing out their chests and get aggressive towards the prospective dates of their daughters. This is daddy's little girl and anyone who hurts her will then be hurt themselves. Some of it is male posturing...like hey get off of my turf. You see it in the animal kingdom when another male rooster gets near the hen house ..stuff like that.

Well having sex just to have sex isnt really a good idea either. Virginity is a once in a lifetime thing so I would think lose it carefully. Sleeping around casually to me cheapens the experience and makes it less enjoyable.

The first time you drive is a once in a life time thing. Does driving back and forth from work and school every day cheapen the experience?

You're just spouting off religious dogma here. Lose it carefully? Sure...I wouldn't want to be raped...but other than wearing protection, what sort of care do you suggest I take? If you want to have sex, and then you go out and have sex, i'd have more respect for you than if you wanted sex but didn't do it for some stupid reason your priest told you. Why not get what you want? Why not follow through on your wishes?

Also, I love how you just spit out the two extremes in your post. You go from virginity to "sleeping around casually." What about the highschoolers who only have sex with their boyfriend/girlfriend? What about the adults who feel a strong physical and/or emotional connection with each other and fuck the second time they meet? Who are you to judge them? Who are you to say one encounter is more special than another.

Not that I go for sluts, but I like a girl who knows what she wants and knows how to give me what I want far more than a first or second timer who just lays there and waits for the "cuddle" period afterwards. Sex isn't what the guy wants and what the girl has to put up with. It should be damn good for both partners.

I myself think that sex education in Germany maybe is a little too liberal, as it is always like: Use condoms and everything is alright. I myself would add:constancy isn't bad, either. Abstinence might be the safest choice, but in my opinion isn't worth it. (Like not driving with your car or taking part in traffic at all would eliminate the risk of dying in a car accident.)

Yes and no. It's a very typically German approach to things, if I remember correctly. You get to hear about the technical bits in biology class, which is were the "Wear a condom"-bit comes in, followed by the reasons why you should do that. And you get to hear about the relationship/emotional/psychological parts in ethics, religious education and psychology.
I would have considered it crassly out of place if my biology teacher had told me it's better to stay with one partner or to wait till marriage. It would have been out of context somehow.

Yesterday I watched The OC (more precisely: O.C., California as it is called in Germany) and one thing really made me laugh: The parents of one of the main characters (Seth Cohen) where not ok with his sleeping at his girlfriends home, though he seems to be something like 18/19.
Moreover I remember I zapped to The OC when there was something about the first sex and Seth Cohen didnt know anything about foreplay.
Is it really like that in America?
That would perfectly fit the stereotype we (Germans) have of uptight Americans.

I wouldn't say that this is what it's like in all America. But it is, for some reason, how Americans accept themselves as being portrayed to the world audience.

We are not nearly as laid back in our sexual mores as Europeans, but then this is a plus and a minus. It would be great if we could openly discuss sex and the nature of it with our kids and this would probably prevent a lot of teen pregnancies.

However, if we were more like Europeans, our divorce rate would go on the rise as it is in Europe. Also, if we were like Sweden, I'd have to see naked old people all the time and that is just no good. ;)

I like it. Only good soap ever. Somehow always in a good mood after watchng it.
The thought of taking a soap as a serious potrayal of...anything, frightens and worries me.

Well having sex just to have sex isnt really a good idea either. Virginity is a once in a lifetime thing so I would think lose it carefully. Sleeping around casually to me cheapens the experience and makes it less enjoyable.
Why is premarital sex always equated with sleeping around? I had sex before marriage (and a good thing too, as 30 a way to old to lose your virginity) with a relatively small number of partners. I was definitely not sleeping around. Even some classmates of mine who were sexually active from an early age onwards, were so mostly in stable relationships. And the one exception, my best friend, is now also happily married with two kids.

And about that losing the virginity thing:
From experience I would compare it to scuba diving. The first time was absolutely fabulous, a never to be repeated experience. BUT: you go on diving and it gets better and better, you gain convidence, can concentrate more on your surroundings as you're less proccupied with yourself ...
It will never be the same as the first time, but that's no reason to have that first dive rather late in life :)

However, if we were more like Europeans, our divorce rate would go on the rise as it is in Europe. Also, if we were like Sweden, I'd have to see naked old people all the time and that is just no good. ;)
But hasn't the Us a much higher divorce rate than most of Europe?
According to this statistic it has: Top 10 divorce rates worldwide (http://www.aneki.com/divorce.html)