NationStates Jolt Archive


America Closes Shop

24oz
23-08-2005, 01:37
WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR ANY U.S.
PRESIDENT, DEMOCRAT OR REPUBLICAN, GIVE THE FOLLOWING SPEECH?

My Fellow Americans:
As you all know, the defeat of Iraq regime has been completed. Since congress does not want to spend any more money on this war, our mission in Iraq is complete. This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all American forces from Iraq. This action will be complete within 30 days. It is now time to begin the reckoning. Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the names of countries which have stood by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is short. The United Kingdom, Spain, Bulgaria, Australia and Poland are some of the countries listed there. The other list contains everyone not on the first list. Most of the world's nations are on that list. My press secretary will be distributing copies of both lists later this evening. Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid to those nations on List 2 ceases immediately and indefinitely. The money saved during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the Iraqi war. The American people are no longer going to pour money into third world Hell-holes and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption. Need help with a famine? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France. In the future, together with Congress, I will work to redirect this money toward solving the vexing social problems we still have at home. On that note, a word to terrorist organizations. Screw with us and we will hunt you down and eliminate you and all your friends from the face of the earth.Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try France or maybe China. To Israel and the Palestinian Authority. Yo, boys. Work out a peace deal now. Just note that Camp David is closed. Maybe all of you can go to Russia for negotiations. They have some great palaces there - big tables, too. I am ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with France, Germany and Russia. Thanks for all your help, comrades. We are retiring from NATO as well. Bon chance, mes amis.I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many UN diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid parking tickets to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and crushed. I don't care about whatever treaty pertains to this. You creeps have tens of thousands of unpaid tickets. Pay those tickets tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes, Beamers, and limos be turned over to some of the finest chop shops in the world. I love New York. A special note to our neighbors. Canada is on List 2. Since we are likely to be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might want to try not pissing us off for a change. Mexico is also on List 2. President Fox and his entire corrupt government really need an attitudeadjustment. I will have a couple extra tank and infantry divisions sitting around. Guess where I am going to put 'em? Yep, border security. So start doing something with your oil. Oh, by the way, the United States is abrogating the NAFTA treaty - starting now. We are tired of the one-way highway. It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens. Some will accuse us of isolationism. I answer them by saying, "darn tootin". Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life around the world has only earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet. It is time to eliminate hunger in America. It is time to eliminate homelessness in America. It is time to eliminate World Cup Soccer from America. To the nations on List 1, a final thought. Thanks, guys. We owe you and we won't forget.To the nations on List 2, a final thought. Drop dead.

God bless America. Thank you and good night.

If you can read this, thank a teacher. If you are reading it in
English, thank a soldier.
CSW
23-08-2005, 01:38
You do that.
Danmarc
23-08-2005, 01:45
Great post. I full-heartedly agree with you. I think we could build our own "Israel=style" 40 ft high wall to keep out immigrants, and call it an "infrastructure movement" for the next 20 years or so, isolationist policies didn't work so poorly, I think the world would shiver to find out we began using them again. Great job... This one just made my day!!!
Aldranin
23-08-2005, 01:46
Need help with a famine? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France.

Amen.
The Lone Alliance
23-08-2005, 01:48
I have a better one.

MY FELLOW AMERICANS

Today We have decided that our current state of Government is no longer working, therefore we will have to draft some reforms starting very soon. As part of these reforms all oversea actions are to cease until this is settled.

(Someone finish it for me.)
CSW
23-08-2005, 01:49
Great post. I full-heartedly agree with you. I think we could build our own "Israel=style" 40 ft high wall to keep out immigrants, and call it an "infrastructure movement" for the next 20 years or so, isolationist policies didn't work so poorly, I think the world would shiver to find out we began using them again. Great job... This one just made my day!!!
I assume that's sarcasm or you have no idea how badly our last little jaunt with isolationism went...
Mind Sickness
23-08-2005, 01:49
Wanna go one step better than isolationism? Encase the entire U.S.A. in a giant, impenitrable, titanium dome. No more U.S. for the rest of the world, and no more rest of the world for the U.S.

It's a win for everyone!
Aldranin
23-08-2005, 01:49
I have a better one.

MY FELLOW AMERICANS

Today We have decided that our current state of Government is no longer working, therefore we will have to draft some reforms starting very soon. As part of these reforms all oversea actions are to cease until this is settled.

(Someone finish it for me.)

You have ADD, don't you?
CthulhuFhtagn
23-08-2005, 01:51
Wouldn't it be nice if the writers of these goddamn spam e-mails all died in horrific, excruciatingly painful ways?
Stinky Head Cheese
23-08-2005, 01:52
WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR ANY U.S.
PRESIDENT, DEMOCRAT OR REPUBLICAN, GIVE THE FOLLOWING SPEECH?

My Fellow Americans:
As you all know, the defeat of Iraq regime has been completed. Since congress does not want to spend any more money on this war, our mission in Iraq is complete. This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all American forces from Iraq. This action will be complete within 30 days. It is now time to begin the reckoning. Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the names of countries which have stood by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is short. The United Kingdom, Spain, Bulgaria, Australia and Poland are some of the countries listed there. The other list contains everyone not on the first list. Most of the world's nations are on that list. My press secretary will be distributing copies of both lists later this evening. Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid to those nations on List 2 ceases immediately and indefinitely. The money saved during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the Iraqi war...<snip>That sounds fantastic.
Gourdland
23-08-2005, 01:53
I assume that's sarcasm or you have no idea how badly our last little jaunt with isolationism went...
No, when we were isolationist was the beginning of WWI. If we had stayed isolated, we would have avoided losing American lives in some European war. My ancestors didn't fight for America in the Revolutionary war so they could send their sons off to save Pierre and Gertrude in some war we shouldn't have even been in.
Aldranin
23-08-2005, 01:54
Wouldn't it be nice if the writers of these goddamn spam e-mails all died in horrific, excruciatingly painful ways?

This is spam? Pfft, better still: this is an email? Wouldn't it be nice if the writers of stupid sentences all died in horrific, excruciatingly painful ways?
Luporum
23-08-2005, 01:54
Wanna go one step better than isolationism? Encase the entire U.S.A. in a giant, impenitrable, titanium dome. No more U.S. for the rest of the world, and no more rest of the world for the U.S.

It's a win for everyone!

I wouldn't mind that, although I do want to visit Japan before they start building.
CthulhuFhtagn
23-08-2005, 01:55
This is spam? Pfft, better still: this is an email? Wouldn't it be nice if the writers of stupid sentences all died in horrific, excruciatingly painful ways?
It's a spam e-mail that the poster decided to post on the board. It's pretty damn obvious.
Aldranin
23-08-2005, 01:56
I assume that's sarcasm or you have no idea how badly our last little jaunt with isolationism went...

This isn't exactly whole-hearted isolationism, it's isolationism combined with ass-kickery with regard to any and all direct threats.
Aldranin
23-08-2005, 01:57
It's a spam e-mail that the poster decided to post on the board. It's pretty damn obvious.

Oh, I see. Good save. ;)
Call to power
23-08-2005, 01:58
I agree isolationism does work screw the orphans!
Penacostia
23-08-2005, 02:00
NATO and the UN is the only thing keeping America safe. We couldn't defend ourselves from a real threat.
The South Islands
23-08-2005, 02:01
NATO and the UN is the only thing keeping America safe. We couldn't defend ourselves from a real threat.

Such as...?
Aldranin
23-08-2005, 02:02
NATO and the UN is the only thing keeping America safe. We couldn't defend ourselves from a real threat.

ROFLMFAO! Oh, man, phew, that was a good one. Sheesh, I just about vomited Pepsi everywhere. Shit. I'll be laughing about that one for weeks. Thanks for making my day.
Aldranin
23-08-2005, 02:03
Such as...?

An alien invasion, duh.
Svetlanabad
23-08-2005, 02:03
While some of these ideas are nice, this is not possible. In fact, in a few months, I'm leaving the US permanantly to live in an isolated part of West Bengal. I like the people, and I need the peace and quiet. I may even travel to Tibet or North India to meet His Holiness, who lives in exile, thanks to the Chinese.

Why am I leaving?

People like you, the supremacist Americans whom I am surrounded by in Dallas (believe it or not, most people in the D/FW area don't live on a ranch, we don't have many horses in these parts, and in some of my advanced classes at out local college, white people are outnumbered 5 to 1, not by Hispanics, but by Indians i.e. people from India, not Native Americans).

Thanks for reminding my why moving to a third-world country is my best choice.
Imitora
23-08-2005, 02:04
Pay those tickets tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes, Beamers, and limos be turned over to some of the finest chop shops in the world.

Its not Beamer, its Bimmer.
Zatarack
23-08-2005, 02:05
I assume that's sarcasm or you have no idea how badly our last little jaunt with isolationism went...


What do you mean isolationism?
24oz
23-08-2005, 02:06
Its not Beamer, its Bimmer.

Thanks
Symlux
23-08-2005, 02:07
It's a spam e-mail that the poster decided to post on the board. It's pretty damn obvious.
What is pritty damn obvious is that you can't tell the difference between an origanal thought and Spam. He did not ask you to foward this message to a number of people nor did he ask for any information, the two things that make spam spam. Now go bash your head in the corner and destroy what little braincells you have left. I am tired of morons like you dumbing up the forums
Luporum
23-08-2005, 02:10
While some of these ideas are nice, this is not possible. In fact, in a few months, I'm leaving the US permanantly to live in an isolated part of West Bengal. I like the people, and I need the peace and quiet. I may even travel to Tibet or North India to meet His Holiness, who lives in exile, thanks to the Chinese.

Why am I leaving?

People like you, the supremacist Americans whom I am surrounded by in Dallas (believe it or not, most people in the D/FW area don't live on a ranch, we don't have many horses in these parts, and in some of my advanced classes at out local college, white people are outnumbered 5 to 1, not by Hispanics, but by Indians i.e. people from India, not Native Americans).

Thanks for reminding my why moving to a third-world country is my best choice.

It's unfortunate that you live Texas. Things are much different in the North-East. You have to remember that Americans are very different depending on where in the country they live.
The Black Forrest
23-08-2005, 02:10
What is pritty damn obvious is that you can't tell the difference between an origanal thought and Spam. He did not ask you to foward this message to a number of people nor did he ask for any information, the two things that make spam spam. Now go bash your head in the corner and destroy what little braincells you have left. I am tired of morons like you dumbing up the forums

Actually it's "dumbing down"
The South Islands
23-08-2005, 02:10
What is pritty damn obvious is that you can't tell the difference between an origanal thought and Spam. He did not ask you to foward this message to a number of people nor did he ask for any information, the two things that make spam spam. Now go bash your head in the corner and destroy what little braincells you have left. I am tired of morons like you dumbing up the forums


Don't mind him, He's American...
Cassiopia Persephone
23-08-2005, 02:10
that has got to be the biggest load of fascist anarcho-capitalist bullshit i've ever read.
BackwoodsSquatches
23-08-2005, 02:11
While some of these ideas are nice, this is not possible. In fact, in a few months, I'm leaving the US permanantly to live in an isolated part of West Bengal. I like the people, and I need the peace and quiet. I may even travel to Tibet or North India to meet His Holiness, who lives in exile, thanks to the Chinese.

Why am I leaving?

People like you, the supremacist Americans whom I am surrounded by in Dallas (believe it or not, most people in the D/FW area don't live on a ranch, we don't have many horses in these parts, and in some of my advanced classes at out local college, white people are outnumbered 5 to 1, not by Hispanics, but by Indians i.e. people from India, not Native Americans).

Thanks for reminding my why moving to a third-world country is my best choice.

Thats nice.

Say hello to our old friends Malaria, starvation, Smallpox, Cholera, and Poverty while your there would you?

Jeez....why dont they write anymore I wonder?
CSW
23-08-2005, 02:12
No, when we were isolationist was the beginning of WWI. If we had stayed isolated, we would have avoided losing American lives in some European war. My ancestors didn't fight for America in the Revolutionary war so they could send their sons off to save Pierre and Gertrude in some war we shouldn't have even been in.
So you advocate allowing genocide to happen? Funny, don't see many people taking that stance.
The Green Plague
23-08-2005, 02:12
While some of these ideas are nice, this is not possible. In fact, in a few months, I'm leaving the US permanantly to live in an isolated part of West Bengal. I like the people, and I need the peace and quiet. I may even travel to Tibet or North India to meet His Holiness, who lives in exile, thanks to the Chinese.

Why am I leaving?

People like you, the supremacist Americans whom I am surrounded by in Dallas (believe it or not, most people in the D/FW area don't live on a ranch, we don't have many horses in these parts, and in some of my advanced classes at out local college, white people are outnumbered 5 to 1, not by Hispanics, but by Indians i.e. people from India, not Native Americans).

Thanks for reminding my why moving to a third-world country is my best choice.


Don't let the door hit you on the way out.... I can imagine this is not going to be a big loss for society...
Imitora
23-08-2005, 02:13
Thats nice.

Say hello to our old friends Malaria, starvation, Smallpox, Cholera, and Poverty while your there would you?

Jeez....why dont they write anymore I wonder?

Move to India, and get every disease that has ever killed anyone!
BackwoodsSquatches
23-08-2005, 02:14
Move to India, and get every disease that has ever killed anyone!


and cobras!

Whoohoo!
The South Islands
23-08-2005, 02:15
I sense this thread will go on for 20 pages...


ommmmmmmmmm
Santa Barbara
23-08-2005, 02:15
If you can read this, thank a teacher. If you are reading it in
English, thank a soldier.

Oh right, because without "soldiers" no one would know English. Talk about hypernationalist propaganda.
CSW
23-08-2005, 02:16
Move to India, and get every disease that has ever killed anyone!
That's wonderfully stereotypical of you.
The Black Forrest
23-08-2005, 02:17
and cobras!

Whoohoo!

And self-immulation. :eek:
24oz
23-08-2005, 02:18
So you advocate allowing genocide to happen? Funny, don't see many people taking that stance.

Couldn’t you say that is another good reason for going into Iraq?
CSW
23-08-2005, 02:19
Couldn’t you say that is another good reason for going into Iraq?
Stopped being genocide a few miles back. In fact, I believe we started the genocide back in '91. That said, my opinions on the Iraq war are something you have no idea of knowing.
The Black Forrest
23-08-2005, 02:19
Couldn’t you say that is another good reason for going into Iraq?

Don't remember that being the reason. Something about nukes wasn't it......
Call to power
23-08-2005, 02:19
Oh right, because without "soldiers" no one would know English. Talk about hypernationalist propaganda.

if it wasn't for soldiers you would be speaking Russian!
CthulhuFhtagn
23-08-2005, 02:20
What is pritty damn obvious is that you can't tell the difference between an origanal thought and Spam. He did not ask you to foward this message to a number of people nor did he ask for any information, the two things that make spam spam. Now go bash your head in the corner and destroy what little braincells you have left. I am tired of morons like you dumbing up the forums
You know, if his attempt at a flame wasn't so pathetic, I might consider reporting it. Consider yourself lucky.
Pschycotic Pschycos
23-08-2005, 02:20
NATO and the UN is the only thing keeping America safe. We couldn't defend ourselves from a real threat.

I think you've got that backwards.



Honestly, if I turned on the TV and saw that, my entire paycheck would go straight to the government. I've been waiting to hear that for years. Screw the rest of the world, they can go...the point is, our lives have gone to shit. Just put Canada on List 1, I've got some friends up there, plus, they did support us, a little, they don't have a lot.
Nadkor
23-08-2005, 02:23
if it wasn't for soldiers you would be speaking Russian!
Specifically non-Russian soldiers, I presume?
24oz
23-08-2005, 02:26
Don't remember that being the reason. Something about nukes wasn't it......

You are right, nukes was the reason the American people said yes. We were lied to. But now that we are there, can we take the bullets and the bombs and the death back? Better find a good reason all these people have died. I don't think a lie is going to cut it.

Is genocide not a good reason?
BackwoodsSquatches
23-08-2005, 02:29
You are right, nukes was the reason the American people said yes. We were lied to. But now that we are there, can we take the bullets and the bombs and the death back? Better find a good reason all these people have died. I don't think a lie is going to cut it.

Is genocide not a good reason?


No..

If it were, we would have gone to Rwanada.
TearTheSkyOut
23-08-2005, 02:32
Wanna go one step better than isolationism? Encase the entire U.S.A. in a giant, impenitrable, titanium dome. No more U.S. for the rest of the world, and no more rest of the world for the U.S.

It's a win for everyone!
Great idea! stop the war and save up all the money to start this project... immediatly!

But I want out first... >.>
24oz
23-08-2005, 02:33
No..

If it were, we would have gone to Rwanada.

I feel we (the world) should be doing something there. Why does the UN not have all the worlds troops their right now?
Luporum
23-08-2005, 02:39
I feel we (the world) should be doing something there. Why does the UN not have all the worlds troops their right now.

That's a good question and I'll give you the simple answer: They have no spine to stand up for someone other than themselves.

I would have MUCH rather seen our troops deployed into Rwanda to control that situation, but right now we can't.

Also didn't France pretty much occupy that area and then just abandon it once the civil war broke out?
The Black Forrest
23-08-2005, 02:39
You are right, nukes was the reason the American people said yes. We were lied to. But now that we are there, can we take the bullets and the bombs and the death back? Better find a good reason all these people have died. I don't think a lie is going to cut it.

Is genocide not a good reason?

But was it genocide or a brutal crushing of a revolt which by the way we encouraged. Rwanda was the planned whole sale slaughter of a people and any supporters.
The Black Forrest
23-08-2005, 02:42
I feel we (the world) should be doing something there. Why does the UN not have all the worlds troops their right now?

Now it's just general fighting. The genocide stuff is over.

The western powers especially the US aren't too interested since it is one of the poorest nations on the planet.
Orangians
23-08-2005, 02:43
that has got to be the biggest load of fascist anarcho-capitalist bullshit i've ever read.

I'm going to assume you're not joking. Do you know what fascism is? Do you know what capitalism is? Do you know what anarchy is? Do you know what anarcho-capitalism is? For god's sakes, I'm tired of people who label everything they oppose "fascist." It's especially intellectually dishonest when coupled with "anarcho-capitalist," which, when you think about it, is almost the complete philosophical opposite of fascism.

And if I read some justification that starts with "fascism is right-wing and capitalism is right-wing, so therefore they're the same," I am going to kill myself.
The Black Forrest
23-08-2005, 02:44
That's a good question and I'll give you the simple answer: They have no spine to stand up for someone other than themselves.

I would have MUCH rather seen our troops deployed into Rwanda to control that situation, but right now we can't.

Also didn't France pretty much occupy that area and then just abandon it once the civil war broke out?

Rwanda? The French didn't control that area. Candians and Belgiums under the UN were there.

Oh and BTW. We are part of the UN as well. On the Security council no less so when you say no spine, you are also labeling us......
24oz
23-08-2005, 02:44
Now it's just general fighting. The genocide stuff is over.

The western powers especially the US aren't too interested since it is one of the poorest nations on the planet.

A brutally true statement!
Luporum
23-08-2005, 02:49
Rwanda? The French didn't control that area. Candians and Belgiums under the UN were there.

Oh and BTW. We are part of the UN as well. On the Security council no less so when you say no spine, you are also labeling us......

We have our hands tied at the moment, so why isn't any other nation stepping in?
The Black Forrest
23-08-2005, 02:52
We have our hands tied at the moment, so why isn't any other nation stepping in?

Even if they weren't, you wouldn't see anything but a token gesture.

Nothing to exploit to pay for our "efforts"

The commanding general at the time said he only needed an extra 5000 well trained and well equiped soldiers and this thing would have been avoided.
Orangians
23-08-2005, 02:53
You are right, nukes was the reason the American people said yes. We were lied to. But now that we are there, can we take the bullets and the bombs and the death back? Better find a good reason all these people have died. I don't think a lie is going to cut it.

Is genocide not a good reason?

Not just nukes. We thought Saddam Hussein was trying to acquire nuclear capabilities, but we know he had WMDs. We know he had WMDs because he used them on his own people. We don't know what happened to them between the time he used WMDs and the time we invaded, but there was never any dispute that he was a murderous and oppressive dictator who slaughtered innocent Iraqis.

Moving on - we screwed up in Rwanda. I hope you recognize, however, that it's never too late to do the right thing. Since that's the case, genocide is justification to invade a country, if you ask me. And it doesn't matter how long ago it was, does it? Did Saddam Hussein become this great classically liberal democrat between his slaughter of the Kurds and when we invaded? Just because the US and the world aren't always consistent in their policies doesn't mean genocide or a brutal dictator isn't a sufficient reason to overthrow a ruler. Anyway, I've gone a bit off topic, but there we are.
Luporum
23-08-2005, 02:54
Even if they weren't, you wouldn't see anything but a token gesture.

Nothing to exploit to pay for our "efforts"

The commanding general at the time said he only needed an extra 5000 well trained and well equiped soldiers and this thing would have been avoided.

That is unfortunately true...
Relative Power
23-08-2005, 02:55
We have our hands tied at the moment, so why isn't any other nation stepping in?


step in to what?

June 22, 1994 With still no sign of U.N. deployment, the Security Council authorizes the deployment of French forces in south-west Rwanda--"Operation Turquoise." They create a "safe area" in territory controlled by the government. However, killings of Tutsis continue in the safe area.


Mid-July 1994 The Tutsi RPF forces capture Kigali. The Hutu government flees to Zaire, followed by a tide of refugees. The French end their mission and are replaced by Ethiopian U.N. troops. The RPF sets up an interim government of national unity in Kigali.
Although disease and more killings claim additional lives in the refugee camps, the genocide is over. An estimated 800,000 Rwandans have been killed in 100 days.



Or do you now have time travel capabilities?
Relative Power
23-08-2005, 03:08
Not just nukes. We thought Saddam Hussein was trying to acquire nuclear capabilities, but we know he had WMDs. We know he had WMDs because he used them on his own people. We don't know what happened to them between the time he used WMDs and the time we invaded, but there was never any dispute that he was a murderous and oppressive dictator who slaughtered innocent Iraqis.

Moving on - we screwed up in Rwanda. I hope you recognize, however, that it's never too late to do the right thing. Since that's the case, genocide is justification to invade a country, if you ask me. And it doesn't matter how long ago it was, does it? Did Saddam Hussein become this great classically liberal democrat between his slaughter of the Kurds and when we invaded? Just because the US and the world aren't always consistent in their policies doesn't mean genocide or a brutal dictator isn't a sufficient reason to overthrow a ruler. Anyway, I've gone a bit off topic, but there we are.


Saddam Hussein was a nasty cruel dictator
which was okay while he was pals with the US
once the US decided to not be pals with him they then
realised he had been a very bad man and lots and lots of Iraqis
would have to die so they could arrest him and ensure
that he never faces trial for international war crimes that the US was complicit in.

We do know what happened to the WMD's between the time he used them
in the 80's and the time you invaded in 2003
they were disposed of and the methods of production destroyed
by or under the supervision of UN weapons inspectors between
1992 and 1998 when they were withdrawn.

A small amount of chemicals were not accounted for and it was
never expected that they could or would be.
Many of the UN weapons inspectors were under the impression
that WMD had been dealt with satisfactorily by the time they were withdrawn.

There is no international law that allows any country to go into another
to change the government of that country.
What international law there was the US chose to tear up rather
than to build up into something that could allow leaders of countries
responsible for atrocities within their own country to be dealt with
in any legal manner.
Mind Sickness
23-08-2005, 03:22
Am I the only one who still thinks the war in Iraq could have been avoided, and Saddam still toppled? The answer would have been simple:

:sniper:

But what about his body doubles? Easy:

:sniper: :sniper: :sniper:

...and his subourdinates? You got it:

:sniper: :sniper: :sniper: ...

I guess you get the picture...
Frostguarde
23-08-2005, 03:23
All of this nationalism is tearing the world apart. The politics, the greed, the hate... It does nothing. That is why you must all rally behind me in my bid for a unified Earth! As we speak, I amass a vast army that will "unify" the world and we shall form the first Global Empi... Republic. >_> Yes! My people, let us join in peace and leave behind the bloody past.

*cough*

On a serious note, America would shrivel up if it weren't part of the world. Any advances that happened in other nations would never make it here, so we would fall behind. And damn it, we may be a superpower, but what will we do with all of our power here? Invade Arizona and pretend it's Iraq? The world, not just America needs to band together and start doing things to honestly help people. Not for oil, or improved trade, but to help people. Of course pigs will start to fly before this happens. Mmm, greed.
Ekland
23-08-2005, 04:38
The world, not just America needs to band together and start doing things to honestly help people. Not for oil, or improved trade, but to help people. Of course pigs will start to fly before this happens. Mmm, greed.

Oh come off it! If you thought Iraq was bad you would shrivel up and start speaking in tongues once we or anyone else start to "help people."
AkhPhasa
23-08-2005, 04:54
Yawn.
Americai
23-08-2005, 06:17
Fixed

My Fellow Americans:
As you all know, the defeat of Iraq regime has been completed. Since congress does not want to spend any more money on this war, our entanglements in Iraq have ceased. This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all American forces from Iraq. This action will be complete within 30 days. It is now time to begin the reckoning. First of all any President that ignore's Congress' power to declare war and tries to avoid the War Powers Act will be impeached immediately in the future. No more war political hacks to deal with.

Also effective immediately, foreign aid shall ceases immediately for an indefinite amount of time. The money saved during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the Iraqi war. The American people are no longer going to pour money into third world hell-holes and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption. Need help with a famine? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France. In the future, together with Congress, I will work to redirect this money toward solving the vexing social problems we still have at home. Our own politicians will also now be under indefinite review by an independent organization named "Jedi Order" in tribute to Star Wars finally explaining what can happen to a Republic for regular folks to understand if a people are not careful.

On that note, a word to terrorist organizations. Screw with us and we will hunt you down and eliminate you and all your friends from the face of the earth. Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try France or maybe China. To Israel and the Palestinian Authority. Work out a peace deal now because we no longer care to be a part of your struggles and problems. Just note that Camp David is closed. Maybe all of you can go to Russia for negotiations. They have some great palaces there - big tables, too.

We are retiring from NATO as well. I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many UN diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid parking tickets to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and crushed. I don't care about whatever treaty pertains to this. You creeps have tens of thousands of unpaid tickets. Pay those tickets tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes, Beamers, and limos be turned over to some of the finest chop shops in the world. A special note to our neighbors. Mexico is also on the list. The entire corrupt government really needs to be destroyed and assimilated. But for the time being, I will have a couple extra tanks and infantry divisions sitting around keeping an eye on our boarders. So start doing something with your oil.

We are also abolishing the FDA, ATF, and FTC. We are going to review all members for criminal and unconstitutional behavior. If found guilty of corruption and abuses of their power, they will be shot on the spot. Lots of fun. In fact, we will show it on cable for entertainment.

Oh, by the way, the United States is abolishing the NAFTA treaty - starting now. We are tired of the one-way highway. It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens. Some will accuse us of partial-isolationism. I answer them by saying, "you all bitch no matter what we do anyway". Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life around the world has only earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet. It is time to eliminate World Cup Soccer from America. It is time to eliminate hunger, homelessness, poverty, obesity, and unhealthyness in America.

May the founders' wisdom guide America. Thank you and good night.
NERVUN
23-08-2005, 06:29
*Yawns* Been here and done that. This has been debated at least two times that I know of on the NS General Forum. Got anything else new?

BTW, if America adopted those notions, our economy would tank quickly. Our companies are no longer just invloved in American companies and many are owned over seas. Hell, our goverment's debt is owned by China...