NationStates Jolt Archive


relationship issues and life in general.

New Sancrosanctia
17-08-2005, 04:29
so i've completely fallen for my ex-girlfriend's former best friend. she's had a thing for me for quite some time as well. the problem has nothing to do with sharon, the insane ex, so much as reina, the object of my immense affection, living many hundreds of miles away. she lives in michiagan, and, this year, will be schooling in germany. i already know how much long distance relationships suck. of course, she'll be back eventually, and might even start going to school in chicago, but still. it's just frustrating because every time i talk to her, which is rather a lot, it just drives home the fact that rei is EVERYTHING i look for in a woman. i dunno what i expect any of you to do about this, but i haven't seen a relationship issue thread here in a bit, so i thought i mix things up. it's on my mind because i get to see her on friday. anyway. what's going on in your lives? aside from falling into a political debate or cybersex, there is no possible way of getting off-topic in this thread.
Lord-General Drache
17-08-2005, 07:44
I say go for it. I've had two long distance relationships so far. One lasted for about a year (a respectable length considering my age at the time), and the current one at 3 years. If you have the patience, and communication ability (That will be the biggest thing to keeping it going), then you're probably fine.
SimNewtonia
17-08-2005, 08:21
I say go for it. I've had two long distance relationships so far. One lasted for about a year (a respectable length considering my age at the time), and the current one at 3 years. If you have the patience, and communication ability (That will be the biggest thing to keeping it going), then you're probably fine.

I haven't been in any sort of relationship yet, but Drache is right - communication is key. It's key in any relationship, of course (wonder why so many relationships fail? Wonder no more!), but it's even moreso in a long distance one.

You're right, we haven't had one of these threads in a while.
[NS]Simonist
17-08-2005, 08:37
If you really think she's worth it, give it a try. However, do be prepared for a possibility that she'll turn you down, especially if she's leaving the country -- this may have nothing to do with whether or not she likes you, more just that some people won't want to try to commit to something like that when they won't even be on the same continent....
Laerod
17-08-2005, 08:42
so i've completely fallen for my ex-girlfriend's former best friend. she's had a thing for me for quite some time as well. the problem has nothing to do with sharon, the insane ex, so much as reina, the object of my immense affection, living many hundreds of miles away. she lives in michiagan, and, this year, will be schooling in germany. i already know how much long distance relationships suck. of course, she'll be back eventually, and might even start going to school in chicago, but still. it's just frustrating because every time i talk to her, which is rather a lot, it just drives home the fact that rei is EVERYTHING i look for in a woman. i dunno what i expect any of you to do about this, but i haven't seen a relationship issue thread here in a bit, so i thought i mix things up. it's on my mind because i get to see her on friday. anyway. what's going on in your lives? aside from falling into a political debate or cybersex, there is no possible way of getting off-topic in this thread.Where exactly?
Anyway, my current ex relationship consists of me no longer taking therapy or medication over it as of last Wednesday. I still have no clue whether I'm feeling better because I haven't seen my ex (well, communicated would be better) for a long time or because I'm really over her.
Liberutopia
17-08-2005, 08:52
You'll be sorry if you don't try... other than your dignity, freedom and various internal organs, what, at this stage, do you have to lose?
Kreitzmoorland
17-08-2005, 09:07
what's going on in your lives?Well, since I'm in a rather angsty mood, I'll reply to your question, something I'm sure no one (not least, me) really wants, but hey, everyone gets to tell a sob story once in a while, right?

Here's the deal. My boyfriend is leaving in a week and half for a year of grad school on the other side of the country. We understood from the begining that we would stop when he left, because it would be unfair to both of us to stay in a commitment for so long when we only met recently (about 3.5 months ago), have been together for only two, and have our own lives, that are leading seperate ways. Add to that a ten year age gap, and it seems impractical.

Of course, I did not anticipate feeling the way I do about him. Basically, I do not want to say goodbye, but I have to. At least I don't regret a second of it....but...what now?
Compulsive Depression
17-08-2005, 09:18
To the OP:
Go for it :)
The worst's not as bad as you think, and neither's the best ;)
Of course, make sure you research telephone tariffs; calls can get expensive.

Of course, I did not anticipate feeling the way I do about him. Basically, I do not want to say goodbye, but I have to. At least I don't regret a second of it....but...what now?

Talk to him... He might feel the same way. Of course, he might not, so don't rely on it. And be gentle...
Mekonia
17-08-2005, 11:28
so i've completely fallen for my ex-girlfriend's former best friend. she's had a thing for me for quite some time as well. the problem has nothing to do with sharon, the insane ex, so much as reina, the object of my immense affection, living many hundreds of miles away. she lives in michiagan, and, this year, will be schooling in germany. i already know how much long distance relationships suck. of course, she'll be back eventually, and might even start going to school in chicago, but still. it's just frustrating because every time i talk to her, which is rather a lot, it just drives home the fact that rei is EVERYTHING i look for in a woman. i dunno what i expect any of you to do about this, but i haven't seen a relationship issue thread here in a bit, so i thought i mix things up. it's on my mind because i get to see her on friday. anyway. what's going on in your lives? aside from falling into a political debate or cybersex, there is no possible way of getting off-topic in this thread.


She's your ex's former best friend...unless she did something scabby which resulted in her title as former best friend..go for it..it'll piss your ex off too! Tho I'm sure your far too mature to do that ;)
Abok
17-08-2005, 11:47
What am I doing?
typing this post of course...duh
SimNewtonia
17-08-2005, 12:59
Well, my life's a lot of tedium atm. Am catching up with a female friend that I get along well with sometime in the next couple of weeks, which is good.
New Sancrosanctia
17-08-2005, 16:09
Well, since I'm in a rather angsty mood, I'll reply to your question, something I'm sure no one (not least, me) really wants, but hey, everyone gets to tell a sob story once in a while, right?

Here's the deal. My boyfriend is leaving in a week and half for a year of grad school on the other side of the country. We understood from the begining that we would stop when he left, because it would be unfair to both of us to stay in a commitment for so long when we only met recently (about 3.5 months ago), have been together for only two, and have our own lives, that are leading seperate ways. Add to that a ten year age gap, and it seems impractical.

Of course, I did not anticipate feeling the way I do about him. Basically, I do not want to say goodbye, but I have to. At least I don't regret a second of it....but...what now?
i think you'll feel miserable about it for a lot longer if you don't tell him how you feel. not to sound like a sap, but honesty is the best policy, at least 90 percent of the time. go for it. regardless of how it goes, at least you'l have leveled with him.
Eastern Coast America
17-08-2005, 16:14
Go after her.
New Sancrosanctia
17-08-2005, 16:21
Go after her.
yeah, alright.