NationStates Jolt Archive

FSMism. (http://www.venganza.org/)

Have you been touched by His noodly appendage?

Of course, it really is all just satyre in response to teaching creationism in science classes (you'll catch the joke pretty damned quickly), but regardless, it is still quite a tasty theory.

I am a member of the congregation of the First United Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. RAmen. :p

Don't read that while drinking soda... ouch..

LOL :D

FSMism. (http://www.venganza.org/)

Have you been touched by His noodly appendage?

Of course, it really is all just satyre in response to teaching creationism in science classes (you'll catch the joke pretty damned quickly), but regardless, it is still quite a tasty theory.

I am a member of the congregation of the First United Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. RAmen. :p
is he order us visit italy once a year and eat spaghetti?

WHY YOU SHOULD CONVERT TO FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTERISM:
Flimsy moral standards.
Every friday is a relgious holiday. If your work/school objects to that, demand your religious beliefs are respected and threaten to call the ACLU.
Our heaven is WAY better. We've got a Stripper Factory AND a Beer Volcano.

:eek: :eek: :eek:

I'm in! :D

I'm a believer :D

I am more touched by his/her noodly appendage than thou!

I have to say, I was reading to hate it because I'm so much better than everybody else, but that's a great graph.

is he order us visit italy once a year and eat spaghetti?

Heretic. Spaghetti is taboo on the holy pilgrimage. One must eat lasagne.

Heretic. Spaghetti is taboo on the holy pilgrimage. One must eat lasagne.

Nahuh! It's meatballs you're supposed to eat. Big, succulent, balls of meat!

:eek: :eek: :eek:

I'm in! :D

I'm with you there! :p

Nahuh! It's meatballs you're supposed to eat. Big, succulent, balls of meat!
Stop playing with them!

I already have a god, Pi the Great.

Blasphemers! Pi the Great was slain in the Trials of Boiling Water by the transubstantiation of coffee into blood in the Holy Coffee Mug of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, to which masses converted to The Ways of Spaghetti!

Let us bow our heads in prayer. RAmen.

:p

I found this a few days ago. It's a brilliant piece of satire.

I shudder to think what FSM does with his noodly appendage in the presence of schoolgirls.

I shudder to think what FSM does with his noodly appendage in the presence of schoolgirls.

His/her noodly appendage appeases both sexes! For such is his/her glory.

I shudder to think what FSM does with his noodly appendage in the presence of schoolgirls.


That's *noodly*, not tentacally, Mr. Anime fan. :p

Blasphemers! Pi the Great was slain in the Trials of Boiling Water by the transubstantiation of coffee into blood in the Holy Coffee Mug of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, to which masses converted to The Ways of Spaghetti!

Let us bow our heads in prayer. RAmen.

:p
That is so fucking wrong to do to a person with liquid in his mouth. :D

*points to his sig*
*dons his pirate suit and prepares to pray*

I've had the beautiful painting (http://www.venganza.org/touched.htm) of our beloved FSM set as my desktop background for some time now. I also live near enough to the Kansas border that, if worst comes to worst, I will wander around outside public schools in Elizabethan-era attire with a cardboard parrot stuck to my shoulder shouting about noodly appendages to anyone who'll listen. Well...I might, anyway. :D

I wonder....is maddox a Pastafarian?

ah, I know of this Spaghetti God, but you should worship His wife, the Cherry Queen.

I swear to God that I put that I was official Bishop of the NS Dioscese of the First United Church of the FSM in my sig like a week or so ago. (At least before someone started a thread on him. I swear! Really!)

And in that official capacity...
*dons Pirate regalia*
I hereby offer the blessings of the Flying Spaghetti Monster to all. May you all be touched by his noodly appendage.

Let us bow our heads and contemplate his noodles.

http://logo.cafepress.com/4/3285719.741454.jpg

I believe that the truth is finally known to humanity, and urge all true Children of the FSM to join the militant extremist branch of the FSM religion, The True and Living Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, and our high prophet, Al Dente (a.ka. The Tooth, The Slightly Hard Prophet, Stiffy, and Overlord of the Undercooked).

Together, we will drown the unbelieving in the thick, meaty, red sauce of their own infidel blood.

Possibly with mushrooms.

I swear to God that I put that I was official Bishop of the NS Dioscese of the First United Church of the FSM in my sig like a week or so ago. (At least before someone started a thread on him. I swear! Really!)

I saw it. :) And Cafetopia's was pre-thread too, IIRC.

And in that official capacity...
*dons Pirate regalia*
I hereby offer the blessings of the Flying Spaghetti Monster to all. May you all be touched by his noodly appendage.

Let us bow our heads and contemplate his noodles.

http://logo.cafepress.com/4/3285719.741454.jpg


:::bows head:::

RAmen.

Bishop, if I might ask: If we are promised a beer volcano in heaven, why does the Holy Coffee Mug of the Flying Spaghetti Monster turn perfectly good beer into chianti, even if it is nice and full-bodied? Shouldn't it instantly transubstantiate chianti into a nice beer?
Sincerly, a humble parishoner

I saw it. :) And Cafetopia's was pre-thread too, IIRC.

I figured the position was vacant, so why not? After all we are all his creatures, even NSers.


:::bows head:::

RAmen.

Bishop, if I might ask: If we are promised a beer volcano in heaven, why does the Holy Coffee Mug of the Flying Spaghetti Monster turn perfectly good beer into chianti, even if it is nice and full-bodied? Shouldn't it instantly transubstantiate chianti into a nice beer?
Sincerly, a humble parishoner

It is simple. The Flying Spaghetti Monster is expressing his displeasure at the state of affairs in the world. In response to the drop in Pirates, the Flying Spaghetti Monster has decided that any glorious beer that touches HIS Holy Coffee Mug shall be turned into chianti. It is his hope that we shall all see the signs and correct the error of our ways. Global warming is another sign. As was the election and re-election of George Bush. HE is angry, and we would do well to heed the warnings he has provided, lest we forsake the beer volcano and stripper factory.

It is simple. The Flying Spaghetti Monster is expressing his displeasure at the state of affairs in the world. In response to the drop in Pirates, the Flying Spaghetti Monster has decided that any glorious beer that touches HIS Holy Coffee Mug shall be turned into chianti. It is his hope that we shall all see the signs and correct the error of our ways. Global warming is another sign. As was the election and re-election of George Bush. HE is angry, and we would do well to heed the warnings he has provided, lest we forsake the beer volcano and stripper factory.
Exactly. Also, the Earth must always be much worse than heaven, or heaven won't seem so great, and people will not see the point of getting there.