NationStates Jolt Archive

For a seemingly random and bizarre poll matchup lets have it out...


In either personal conflict or a war between dominions of more or less equal levels of strength and technology...who would emerge victorious?

Joseph Stalin (as Soviet propaganda portrayed him)

or

Emperor Palpatine

Even going with the comic book version of Stalin :) Palpatine has UNLIMITED POWER!!!! :D

And a Lightsaber > Man of Steel

Palpatine has Stalin on the floor begging for mercy.

However Stalin may be able to counteract the lightsaber with the sickle & hammer...and the power of Lenin on his side...

Palpatine invades European Russia, taking Moscow, Stalin retreats to Siberia, where his natural "Russian-ness" makes him invulnerable to the cold, where he stacks wood for peasants so they can stay warm, whilst Palpatine gets frostbite on his fingers, so they duke it out with Snowtroopers and Soviet Conscripts until I come along and call it utterly retarded and take a nap.

I would argue for Palpatine either way. Force-lightning is an effective weapon, while Stalin (even with a gun) couldn't get at him. And why? In the movies, even Vader and such could parry blaster shots. A dark-side-master-badass such as Palpatine could likely do the same.

And in a battle of dominions: I would argue for Palpatine again. Stalin just doesn't have the experience in multi-planet conflicts.

Man, we are geeks, aren't we?

Roughly equal strength and technology. Meaning Stalin doesn't get a gun while Palpatine gets force lightning and lightsabers.

I'm not much of an expert: by "gun" I more or less mean "ranged weapon." Make it blaster, phazer, howitzer, or whatever you choose. The principle is the same, as far as I can tell.

Besides, there's nothing technological about it: the Force is not technology, it's inherent to their own awesomeness. (Although the concept of Stalin the Sith is intriguing...)

In fact, I'll revise my opinion: Stalin and Palpatine shouldn't have fought: Stalin will become Darth Stalin, his apprentice.

Palpatine was a powerful Sith, but if we're talking about Stalin as portrayed by his propaganda, then that would mean he is an all-seeing, all-knowing god.


I am reserving judgement for the time being, but I thought I should point that out to you.

Roughly equal strength and technology. Meaning Stalin doesn't get a gun while Palpatine gets force lightning and lightsabers.
Ironic, that the Jedi and Sith have this technology during a time, "A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away", isn't it?

Joe Stalin had chunks of Sith tougher than Palpatine in his colon.

Stalin is Shit!
Nazi Propoganda says so!

I'll vote Stalin. He destroyed tge Evil Ice in Weebl & Bob's history of the World.

Both would be too evenly matched. Stalin the Ideal is pretty much the Dark Lord in all respects. They would kill millions/billions/trillions/ect. until one (or both) of their States either collapsed from exaustion or one (or both) died.

Pity the planet/galaxy/universe in the meantime...

I'd go for Stalin because his ideal is better then the reality (we are after all talking more about the fictional all-knowing, wise, caring leader and not the pockmorked, ideolgue, incompotent, sceaming tyrant!)

stalin vs. the emperor............ i dont no they are both pretty kick ass.....
stalin has.....well.....stuff.... and the emperor has sith powers... BUT stalin did command one of the greatest powers the world has ever known.... while emperor is fictional........ so all stalin has to do is kill george lucas.....and destroy all the starwars movies and BAM!... the emperor dies....... the END... p.s. STALIN ROCKS...... I LOVE HIM....... hes all like :sniper: and the emperor is all like :fluffle:

You all seem to be forgetting something. Joe Stalin is, in reality, SUPER MARIO! All he would have to do is jump on Palpatine's head, and that would be it. Victory for Stalin!

Would even Palpatine dare go up against a moustache like that? :D

P.S. I think in one of the cash-in star wars books it revealed that Palpatine had hundreds of clones ready to take over when he died.

You all seem to be forgetting something. Joe Stalin is, in reality, SUPER MARIO! All he would have to do is jump on Palpatine's head, and that would be it. Victory for Stalin!

In Soviet Russia, Palpatine's head jump you!

(As an aside, I'd love to see Super Mario!Stalin flick fireballs from his nose. That'd be so rad...)

Stalin WOULD possess the good socialist Super Mario hammer and sickle...

Stalin WOULD possess the good socialist Super Mario hammer and sickle...
Which of course makes him invulnerable to fire

The poll is nearly even at this point, earlier it was a very large Palpatine majority...

Stalin. Simply because every Star Wars movie after "The Empire Strikes Back" was utter shite.

*ducks the flames from the Star Wars nerds who inhabit every inch of civilization*

In Soviet Russia, Palpatine's head jump you!

(As an aside, I'd love to see Super Mario!Stalin flick fireballs from his nose. That'd be so rad...)

whats the russian comics name? yakov shermnov?...... or something like that