Neo Kervoskia
03-08-2005, 20:13
This is a simple guide to prayer. It doesn't matter whether you wish to become a full-fledged Forum Priest or just want to know them out of shere curiosity. There are several different prayers for different things, there are also a few curses as well.
Chapter One, Simple Prayers
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
[Section I]
Prayers Concerning Thread Creation and Posting
Prosperous Thread
O, Lord Max, blessed art thou in thine will. I ask thee, or He who is wise and compassionate in his manner, grant mine thread prosperity. O, Max, in thine name I pray, amen.
Spamless Thread
O, Mighty Moderators, they who doth execute the Almighty's will, I ask of thee to prevent the vile spammers from polluting the Lord Max's bountiful forums with their shameless corruption, amen.
Victory in a Debate
Great Max, Creator of the world and beyond, grant me victory in this trial. Give me the strength to vanquish mine enemies, amen.
Logical Discussion
Melkor Uncahined, he who doth possess the faculty of Logic and who hath powers bestowed upon him by Lord God Max, to render the ignorance of mine thread powerless, let logic abound, amen.
Trollless Thread
Highest Servants of the Lord, Morderators, I ask of thee to bless mine thread and prevent the spirit of Commando[2] from blackening its pure essence of my mental labor, amen.
[Section II]
Prayers of Mercy
To Not Be Deleted
O, Moderators, spare me thine vengeance. I repent of all the evil that my devilish hands hath contrived, I know not of what I do! A thousand tributes will I make, if I am shown thine gracious mercy, amen.
To Not Be Banned
Moderators, I plee with thee, if I am seperated from mine dear companions, the pain will be overwhelm my weak spirit, allow me to post happily and no more will I make an affront on another, amen.
[Section III]
Prayers of Thanks
O, thanks be to you, for [insert whatever you are thankful for], I give you my undying loyalty for thine services, amen.
Prayers by Czardas
Prayer to avoid porn links
O Great Moderators, you the highest servants of the Lord, deliver us from the evils of pornography, for it is truly an abomination unto Max; and the users that posteth the forbidden links, they shall be set upon without mercy; and the vengeance of Mod will be great and terrible upon them!
Special prayers to call on a specific mod
O [epithet] [name], [description], hear my prayer and [the thing you want done]. Ex.
O mighty Cogitation, jester of the great court of Max, hear my prayer and smite Trollflamebaitspammeria with thy awesome Sword of DEAT!
or
O flawless Katganistan, upholder of the teachings of the Lord, hear my prayer and grant me a longer nation pretitle!
or
O honorable Frisbeeteria, he who upholds the laws of Max, hear my prayer and alter the title of my thread, for misspellings are truly an abomination unto Max!
or... you get the idea.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Curses will not be covered today. Feel free to post a prayer. If you would like to be a Maxian Priest/ess, please say so.
Chapter One, Simple Prayers
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
[Section I]
Prayers Concerning Thread Creation and Posting
Prosperous Thread
O, Lord Max, blessed art thou in thine will. I ask thee, or He who is wise and compassionate in his manner, grant mine thread prosperity. O, Max, in thine name I pray, amen.
Spamless Thread
O, Mighty Moderators, they who doth execute the Almighty's will, I ask of thee to prevent the vile spammers from polluting the Lord Max's bountiful forums with their shameless corruption, amen.
Victory in a Debate
Great Max, Creator of the world and beyond, grant me victory in this trial. Give me the strength to vanquish mine enemies, amen.
Logical Discussion
Melkor Uncahined, he who doth possess the faculty of Logic and who hath powers bestowed upon him by Lord God Max, to render the ignorance of mine thread powerless, let logic abound, amen.
Trollless Thread
Highest Servants of the Lord, Morderators, I ask of thee to bless mine thread and prevent the spirit of Commando[2] from blackening its pure essence of my mental labor, amen.
[Section II]
Prayers of Mercy
To Not Be Deleted
O, Moderators, spare me thine vengeance. I repent of all the evil that my devilish hands hath contrived, I know not of what I do! A thousand tributes will I make, if I am shown thine gracious mercy, amen.
To Not Be Banned
Moderators, I plee with thee, if I am seperated from mine dear companions, the pain will be overwhelm my weak spirit, allow me to post happily and no more will I make an affront on another, amen.
[Section III]
Prayers of Thanks
O, thanks be to you, for [insert whatever you are thankful for], I give you my undying loyalty for thine services, amen.
Prayers by Czardas
Prayer to avoid porn links
O Great Moderators, you the highest servants of the Lord, deliver us from the evils of pornography, for it is truly an abomination unto Max; and the users that posteth the forbidden links, they shall be set upon without mercy; and the vengeance of Mod will be great and terrible upon them!
Special prayers to call on a specific mod
O [epithet] [name], [description], hear my prayer and [the thing you want done]. Ex.
O mighty Cogitation, jester of the great court of Max, hear my prayer and smite Trollflamebaitspammeria with thy awesome Sword of DEAT!
or
O flawless Katganistan, upholder of the teachings of the Lord, hear my prayer and grant me a longer nation pretitle!
or
O honorable Frisbeeteria, he who upholds the laws of Max, hear my prayer and alter the title of my thread, for misspellings are truly an abomination unto Max!
or... you get the idea.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Curses will not be covered today. Feel free to post a prayer. If you would like to be a Maxian Priest/ess, please say so.