NationStates Jolt Archive

I've had a recent revelation which I can no longer ignore. I first became aware of it when I was 9 maybe 10 years old. At first I told no one keeping it a secret, but it became much more evident in my teens. It attracted unwanted attention though you could say boys will be boys and I brought it on myself.

It turns out this difference is proven to show a pattern of heriditability. It is hypothesized to be genetic however also influenced by environmental factors. I certainly didn't choose it. I assumed it to be normal then convinced it wasn't and conformity became my prison.

I am a methane producer! I belong to the 1/3 of the population who expel methane gas when passing our flammable wind which when lit produces a distinct blue flame.

I no longer feel alone, scared and ashamed. I know there are many more like me who risk exploding during intestinal surgery if cauterization is used and whose flatulence contribute to global warming. I can ignite my wind and take pride with the total absence of the yellow flame of conformity!

All hail the Royal Order of the Blue Flame!

*pride flag to follow*

:D

:D Congradulations!

Confusion say: :Man who sleep in strawberry patch, wake up with ass in jam."

Congratualtions. How is your family taking it??? Your probably not alone. I know some bovines who have the same problem :D

Methane? Pitiful. I can produce phosphorus, sulfur, oxygen, helium, hydrogen, and mercury vapor, at will. I love being Ruler of the Multiverse. :D

Don't smoke or they'll be another case of spontaneous combustion in the news :p

Impressive.

I once pooped a perfect cube. But never in competition. *nod* :)

You've set your farts on fire? Have you not seen South Park them movie?

Have the car engine converted, and when you need to go somewhere just use a pipe to attach it to your ass. :D

http://home.satx.rr.com/maylay/fart.jpg
get some practice and you might be able to beat me one day.

let the contest begin! *parp*

Finally! A solution to the world energy crisis. Or better, oxidise it with water and make methnol, so you get hammered when you have a fart :D

Hahahaha. *gives thread seal of approval*

I've had a recent revelation which I can no longer ignore. I first became aware of it when I was 9 maybe 10 years old. At first I told no one keeping it a secret, but it became much more evident in my teens. It attracted unwanted attention though you could say boys will be boys and I brought it on myself.

It turns out this difference is proven to show a pattern of heriditability. It is hypothesized to be genetic however also influenced by environmental factors. I certainly didn't choose it. I assumed it to be normal then convinced it wasn't and conformity became my prison.

I am a methane producer! I belong to the 1/3 of the population who expel methane gas when passing our flammable wind which when lit produces a distinct blue flame.

I no longer feel alone, scared and ashamed. I know there are many more like me who risk exploding during intestinal surgery if cauterization is used and whose flatulence contribute to global warming. I can ignite my wind and take pride with the total absence of the yellow flame of conformity!

All hail the Royal Order of the Blue Flame!

*pride flag to follow*

:DDamit.. now they're going to hunt the rest of us out... can you imagine the EPA getting on our asses about 'emmissions' and lowering pollution...

thanks a lot. :mad: ;)