NationStates Jolt Archive

http://db.gamefaqs.com/console/psx/file/resident_evil_plot.txt

A damn funny read, full of wit and wisedom about a popular survival horror game series. Written by Thomas Wilde and President Evil.

Be sure to read the Random Musings and Say What?! sections.

Here's a few extracts:

1) "Nemesis was actually:
2a. Wesker. The radiation from the nuke turned him human again.
(This, and the other radiation-based theories, all stem
back from before Outbreak when we thought the missile at
the end of RE3 was a nuke.)
2b. The original Wesker. The one in CV was a clone (with/without
"Hunter genes," depending on who's talking).
2c. Jill's anonymous "boyfriend," mentioned in RE2.
2d. Ada. She survived the end of RE2 by using the G-Virus, and
then turned right around and became Nemesis. (...so the
G-Virus lets you travel back in time? William Birkin was
a friggin' *genius*!)
2e. Rebecca.
2f. The (previously) unidentified guy in the STARS group photo.
2g. Regina. No, I don't know why he'd be Regina, particularly
since if Regina even *exists* in the RE universe, she'd
be eleven.
2h. Hey, Billy Coen could've been Nemesis! (HATING YOU SO MUCH)
2i. Hey, D.I.J. could be Nemesis, who was turned into a mouse
by the nuke's radiation! (...am I the only one who didn't
learn about radiation from Silver Age Marvel comics?)
2j. American "prop comic" Carrot Top, in his video game debut.
2k. He was sculpted out of delicious tapioca pudding, and
left in the microwave too long.
2l. No one actually *made* him. They found him clogging up
the floor drain in the Dead Factory.
2m. Nemesis is 1952 Democratic presidential candidate Adlai
Stevenson. "STAAARRRSSSS" is really code for "Eisenhower
beat me, so I will extract revenge on you, Jill!
Rrraaarrggghhh!" (I always thought Adlai looked a little
shifty.)"

2) "Wesker survived RE because there is more than one Wesker. There
is actually a *series* of Weskers, created by forces unknown, which
are sent out to perform various tasks. These Weskers are:
1a. ...clones.
1b. ...robots.
1c. ...robot clones.
1d. ...robot killer death clones. Yeah, bitch.
1e. ...Rebecca. Yes, that's right, *all* of them are *Rebecca*.
She's *very clever*.
1f. ...Nemesis. Turnabout is fair play.
1g. ...created by Dr. Mephisto for his own evil purposes. Some
of them have as many as *five* asses! Quake in terror,
mortals! The five-assed Wesker thirsts for your blood!"

3) "(According, that is, to "anonymous
sources" inside the development staff. Why is it that everyone
and their mom, EXCEPT ME, has "anonymous sources" inside Capcom?)"

4) "Brad was an Umbrella spy before his death. (And not a very good
one, either.)"

Be sure to post your feelings and favourite quotes from it.

BUMP!

And here's some more:

"Peter and Greg developed Daylight on their own. Greg was working for Umbrella at the time, but the difficulty of Daylight's manufacture and Greg's obvious anti-Umbrella slant in "Decisions, Decisions" would infer
that he never bothered telling Umbrella about it. In point
of fact, he clearly saw it as a tool to use against them.
(Dept. of Blatant Irony: it's instead used to destroy
Greg's masterpiece. Insert Nelson laugh here.)

"Since Peter's found dead on a desk and he never reanimates,
that would point the finger at Greg. (I wish Greg had
a suitably villainous last name.)"

"Q. Who was Luis Sera?

A. He claims to have been a cop. Later, he confesses
while dying that he was one of Saddler's biologists,
which doesn't preclude his being a former cop (especially
in the world of RE, where everyone has six careers before
they hit 21)."

"Q. Who's D.I.J.?

A. A mouse. Specifically, he's the mouse that runs under
the closing blast shutter when Alfred traps Claire in the
military training facility. He shows up again in Antarctica,
when Claire lets him out of the locker in Alfred's office.
Reportedly, if you stay alert, you can see him again and
again throughout Claire's game on Rockfort, especially if
you use a GameShark to get the sniper rifle on Disc One.

He is not, repeat *not*, the Ashford family's butler. We don't
know what happened to Scott Harman (although the smart money
says that he was one of the zombies wearing suits marked with
the Ashford family crest), but he wasn't in the cargo plane
when Claire fought the Tyrant.

Q. How the hell can a mouse keep a diary?

A. He's a very smart mouse.

Q. Weren't those two mice different colors? How could it be
the same mouse?

A. He's a *very* smart mouse."

"Q. If the T-Virus was accidentally spilled at the island
prison, why wasn't Claire infected?

A. Once again, we will temporarily ignore the T-Virus's sense
of humor and focus on the facts. Looking at Rockfort, the only
people who get infected are the prisoners, Alfred's servants,
and a couple of unlucky members of Wesker's strike team. Claire,
Steve, Rodrigo, Alfred, Wesker, Chris, that guy in the clean
suit who gets killed by the Bandersnatch, and at least three
cargo planes filled with survivors all manage to get off Rockfort
without becoming zombies. We're left to conclude that the T-Virus
was being lazy that day, it was a weak batch, or it didn't have
enough time to work on everyone. (It's notable that CV's virus
has the least time of any of them to go into effect, barring
perhaps that in the first scenario of Outbreak.) Further, the
protagonists of RE games have traditionally enjoyed a near-complete
immunity to the T-Virus, barring circumstance."

"Q. What's the difference between CV and CVX?

A. Oh, a few things.

-- the Easy and Very Easy difficulty settings from the Japanese
release have been put back in, because little things like not
having arms shouldn't keep you from enjoying Code Veronica. (It
really is the easiest of the REs, you know, even on Normal.)
-- Steve has a new haircut. Now, instead of looking like Leonardo
DiCaprio, he looks like Leonardo DiCaprio without access to
hair care products.
-- a new cutscene featuring Wesker and Claire, triggered when
Claire returns to the mansion with the Piano Roll.
-- a couple of lines of dialogue have been changed.
-- the ending's about three times as long, as detailed above.
-- in CVX, Wesker gets a hit in on Alexia. In CV, Alexia slaps him
around like a handball.
-- everyone gets different character portraits in their inventory
screens. (Steve is such a goober.)
-- really fake-looking fire has been Photoshopped over Wesker's
Battle Game victory screen."

More to come!

Here's some more:

"A few die-hard RE fans, though, had come to the conclusion that
Nemesis must've been Wesker, since every other major RE character
except Rebecca was accounted for, and the idea of Becky "Useless"
Chambers being turned into a killer bioweapon was (and is) just
silly. These people could usually back the theory up pretty well.
Wesker's return in Code Veronica kinda screwed them. Now, they
have to explain how Wesker could've (deep breath now) survived
RE, gotten cloned (optional, dependent upon theorist), become
Super Wesker, gotten turned into Nemesis, survived being shot
to "death" at the clock tower, taken a long nap in a gasoline
fire, mutated into Tentacle Nemesis, gotten his head burned
off his body, survived being thrown into the Dead Factory's
waste dump, mutated into Kinda-Looks-Like-William-Birkin Nemesis,
gotten beat up by Jill again, gotten blasted twice by Paracelsus's
Sword, gotten to a minimum safe distance from Raccoon City in
less than five minutes despite being dead, gotten turned back
into Wesker, quit his job at Umbrella, joined up with whatever
organization he's working for in CV, invaded Rockfort Island,
ran away before Alexia turned him into Aztec barbecue, swiped
Steve's body, beaten the pudding out of Chris, fled the Ashfords'
Antarctic base via a convenient submarine, and still managed
to find the time to get that *great* haircut. The answer is,
of course, that Wesker couldn't and that he wasn't Nemesis,
but some people just refuse to give up on something once they've
spent that much time on it. Not even Wesker's Report is stopping
some of these dedicated conspiracists. Hell, after writing this,
*I* want him to be Nemesis."

"As a side note, there are five dead Umbrella agents in the
sewer, even though there are only four of them in Annette's
FMV. It's possible that Hunk survived Birkin's rampage by
being conveniently absent ("Hey, guys, I brought the
sandwiches--OH MY GOD!"), and something else decked him
before Leon and Claire's arrival."

"As I've said before, coincidences are not useful. Tyrants are
kind of rare under the best of circumstances (unless one happens
to be on Sheena Island, in which case one can find the damn
things in vending machines), so this rogue Tyrant in Birkin's
lab would seem to be our escapee. (Some people object to this
and point to the storage containers on the eighth floor of the
sewage treatment facility, but that tank used to hold one of
the cockroaches.) In that case, this Tyrant's been dead for
two months. Case closed.

The biggest problem with this is that if it's true, and it
looks as though it might be, we're also expected to assume that
William Birkin's the worst housekeeper in explored space. The
Tyrant in his lab escaped in late July. While he's done some
minor cleanup by the time the Outbreak crew drops by, the place
is still trashed. Maybe Birkin just put a new, really big door
on the room--sort of the mad-scientist equivalent of kicking
dirty socks under the bed--and called it a day, I don't know,
but it's still a flaw in the plan."

"Q. Why does it take three shots from Barry's Magnum to kill the
first zombie?

A. Sunspot activity, poor aim, underpacked bullets, a bulletproof
*super* zombie, the planetary alignment at the time, low blood
sugar, psychological trauma, the capricious whims of a mischievous
God, and/or because it's "Barry-style." Pick your favorite!"

I think this thread is starting to die.

This is one of the reasons I find the GameFAQs community to be so annoying.

This is one of the reasons I find the GameFAQs community to be so annoying.

But wait! You haven't heard my FAVE bit:

"Q. How did [character] in [game] get from [place] to [place]?
There's no way for him to leave/get there! How did [character]
in [game] survive in [dangerous area] with only a [weak weapon]?

A. Well, Timmy, it's time for us to have a little talk.

You see, in the fun-packed thrill ride that *is* Resident
Evil, there are two kinds of people. We control one kind
of person over the course of a game, such as Jill, Chris,
Claire, or Leon. They are bound, largely, by human limits.
If they get hurt badly enough, they die; if they encounter
a locked door, they'll need to find a way to open it; if
they go up against a Tyrant with a 9mm handgun, they are
screwed beyond the telling of it. Aside from a few obvious
differences, such as Jill's ability to catch an anti-tank
rocket to the face without disfigurement, Claire's black
belt in Gun-Kata, how Chris can take a good four shots
to the face from Wesker and yet still retain enough basic
motor skills to fly an airplane, their strange reluctance
to so much as *try* for the #$%&ing headshot and their
tendency to declare a door permanently closed and thus
unimportant if there's a rock on the floor in front of
it, they are much like you or I.

Then... then, Timmy, there are the *other* people.

These are the NPCs. The NPCs are a strange and wondrous
lot, possessed of powers beyond mortal ken. These are your
"helpers," and note the sarcastic quotes; these are the
other, uninfected humans who assist and/or hinder you over
the course of the game. I speak of Sherry, Ada, Carlos,
Rebecca (the REv.2 version), Nicholai, Steve, Wesker, Barry,
Annette, Alfred, and the rest of their fell breed.

(It should be noted for the sake of accuracy that NPC
powers are not unique to the Resident Evil series.
They are, in fact, possessed by all NPCs in virtually
any story-driven game on the planet. As of this writing,
Mayu Amakura is their undisputed queen.)

An NPC can move around behind the scenes of reality, to
reach inaccessible areas or sweep ghostlike through roomsful
of bloodthirsty Hunters. Unless they briefly *lose* these
mighty powers--they pass into the realm of being controlled
by the player--an NPC can do whatever the hell he or she
wants, even if that means already being in a room that
took you an hour to open, surviving the kind of punishment
that would kill your character twice, leaving an area without
using the only exit, or getting through a difficult part of
the game without a scratch while armed with an empty pistol
and a cocktail straw. Their powers are mighty.

Whenever an NPC does something that simply does not make
any sense, these powers are to blame. How did Enrico get
from Birkin's lab to the Spencer mansion without using
the training facility elevator? His NPC powers. How did
Ada escape from the treatment facility? Her NPC powers.
How did Carlos get back into the chapel from the courtyard?
NPC powers. How come Steve can fire the Lugers that fast
in the Disc One Bandersnatch-killing cutscene, but his
rate of fire slows down considerably in the Battle Game?
The loss of his NPC powers. It all makes sense."

"possessed of powers beyond mortal ken"

So, these NPC's have powers beyond that of Ken from Steet Fighter II?

Immortal Ken would be a whole other ballgame, I'm sure...

"possessed of powers beyond mortal ken"

So, these NPC's have powers beyond that of Ken from Steet Fighter II?

Immortal Ken would be a whole other ballgame, I'm sure...

I think he meant to type "possessed of powers beyond mortal kin" ,so disregard. ;)

I think he meant to type "possessed of powers beyond mortal kin" ,so disregard. ;)

...Which is why I decided to post something so sarcastic.

...Which is why I decided to post something so sarcastic.

Hahahahaha :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

And heeeeeeeeeere's some more quotes:

"Marcus's assassination is carried out by a couple of gas-masked
goons with submachineguns. This means that Umbrella's black-ops
troops are now two for two on indirectly making their targets into
virus-fueled killing machines."

"The final battle against the queen leech is like a demented
beerslam of all the final encounters in every RE game to date,
plus the movie. The fight takes place with a five-minute timer,
on a helipad, against a giant slithery "queen" that attacks with
gouts of disgusting fluid, and the main character must stay alive
until he's provided with the weapon he needs to win. The final
blow's dealt by someone's carelessly discarded revolver,
accompanied by a cheesy one-liner and gratuitous bullet time."

LOL :D

I think he meant to type "possessed of powers beyond mortal kin" ,so disregard. ;)

...Which is why I decided to post something so sarcastic.


Or maybe not:

Clicky: Definition, "Ken." (http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=ken)

EDIT: btw, the link doesn't work for me.

I get this page:

http://www.gamefaqs.com/nolink.html

Or maybe not:

Clicky: Definition, "Ken." (http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=ken)

EDIT: btw, the link doesn't work for me.

I get this page:

http://www.gamefaqs.com/nolink.html

Please explain... :confused:

EDIT: btw, the link doesn't work for me.

I get this page:

http://www.gamefaqs.com/nolink.html

Ditto.

(And for the OP: this thread isn't spam because....?)

(And for the OP: this thread isn't spam because....?)

1) I'm not being paid.
2) Neither of the authors of the plot guide asked to do this.
3) Er...Your Mother's spam because....because...uh..CAUSE SHE HAD SEX WITH ME!! YEAH! YOU LIKE IT! YOU LIKE IT!

1) I'm not being paid.
2) Neither of the authors of the plot guide asked to do this.

So what? That doesn't magically make it not spam.

3) Er...Your Mother's spam because....because...uh..CAUSE SHE HAD SEX WITH ME!! YEAH! YOU LIKE IT! YOU LIKE IT!

Flaming is usually a poor choice of response.

So what? That doesn't magically make it not spam.



Flaming is usually a poor choice of response.

Spam is advertisement sent over the internet on forums and e-mails.

I am not advertising this plot guide, just pointing out my opinion of it.

Spam is advertisement sent over the internet on forums and e-mails.

I am not advertising this plot guide, just pointing out my opinion of it.

Nope. Spam is defined in the posted rules (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=416023) as:
Spam/SPAM: Off-topic, irrelevant and multi-posts that clog the server. This includes posting lots of smilies which is known as Smilie Spam. Also akin to spamming is Post-whoring which is when a player posts anything just to increase the postcount. Spamming to the point where you get deleted is known as Klamathing. Spamming in the forums should be reported through the Moderation forum, and In-game, through the Getting Help Page.


You've posted several large chunks of text from a review. This is generally known as cut-and-paste spam, and it's frowned upon.
You continued to do so even after you yourself noted (end of post #3) that there didn't seem to be any significant interest in the topic, making it even spamier.

I think the authors or several of them, never thought it thoroughly when they made it.

THey just do it as they go along throughout the series.

But I kinda like the movies. People say RE2 sucked, but heck, at least it's fun. Wish there was more skin though.

Whats more to like? It's like have all the points to be every guys movie. Guns, Girls and Gore!