NationStates Jolt Archive

Basically I am wondering if you are disconnected like my family or not. I don't know if this is mostly an American problem or not, but in my family and many others around me are not such great caregivers of the elderly in our family.

It seems that most couldn't care less that our grandmothers and grandfathers are barely surviving and we don't offer them any of our help or support or we send them off to crappy rest homes to die alone in usually less than sanitary conditions.

It seems to me that people are generally more family-oriented in other countries. I know that many in the US as very family oriented too but a great many aren't. I suppose that my family being poor on the whole has something to do with that as well.

Family is still sort of an important thing in Chinese culture...sort of...because now the Communist Party reigns all...

The only grandparent I have left is my grandmother. From what I've heard all four grandparents were treated very nicely. I have a happy family! :D

My only remaining grandmother is in a retirement home, although it's a few minutes drive away so we are always visiting, taking her for outings and doing her washing and things.

With respect. And care. :)

The circumstances of a nuclear family does not allow us to take care of our oldies traditionally, but we do send money back home annually.

If my maternal grandfather is still alive, I would treat him with unparallel respect. He was a WWII veteran and killed Japs. Ya hear me? He killed Japs!

Pity he died when I was 6. If he's still alive, his war stories would have kept me entertained for hours. I personally want to know what it feels like to kill a goddamn Jap!

The circumstances of a nuclear family does not allow us to take care of our oldies traditionally, but we do send money back home annually.

If my maternal grandfather is still alive, I would treat him with unparallel respect. He was a WWII veteran and killed Japs. Ya hear me? He killed Japs!

Pity he died when I was 6. If he's still alive, his war stories would have kept me entertained for hours. I personally want to know what it feels like to kill a goddamn Jap!

Don't be a twatty racist, please. And what's different between a nuclear family and any other family?

My grandparents, great-grandparents, great aunts and uncles, etc are all very well cared for in my family. I think I'm absolutely lucky to have great grandparents alive while I'm in college, so I spend as much time with them as I can. On my father's side, which is of considerable size, we have a veritable governing system; there is a board that makes most of the major family decisions (with myself representing my generation :D ), but everything is run by my great uncle Charlie before sent out in newsletter format. He's 95 or so and the oldest family member, so of course we all realize how blessed we are to have him around.....

And of course NONE of our older members are disgraced with nursing homes unless they wish to be put in one, which, to my knowledge, has only happened once......when I was very small.

They're all dead (we saw to that years ago).

And what's different between a nuclear family and any other family?

Nuclear family is mom and dad and the kids, the kids grow up and move out and have nuclear families of their own, and mom and dad get old together until usually one of them drops off and then the other remaining one gets shunted off into an old-folks home.

With as much respect and care as possible.

My grandmother (born in France, but Canadian) goes to France twice a year to stay with her 90 year old mother. Sounds nice, right? Only problem, she acts like a martyr for doing it, and doesn't help Meme all that much, and is trying to put my great grandmother in a home. She treats her with respect, but doesn't respect this incredibly strong woman who has been a widow since 29, and raised five kids of her own during WWII, then took in foster children and ran a general store to make ends meet after.
Many of my French relatives live within walking distance of my Meme but see her only once or twice a week. There are days when she sees no one. I travelled across the ocean to see her, and two of her children cannot find the time to drive for a few hours to see her. Her only living son has not visited in years.
Life was harder than it is in years gone by, in the Western world, at least. People who made it are to be respected. I, if not all the members of my family, respect the old folks.

Don't be a twatty racist, please. And what's different between a nuclear family and any other family?

I'm not being a twatty racist! My grandfather fought Jappers and I have a right to use that term.

Anyway, there are two types of families: nuclear and extended. Nuclear families (common in modern day developed, usually urban or suburban areas) are just the parents and children, with occassionally one grandparent. Extended families however, include not only the parents and kids, but also aunts, uncles, cousins and grandparents living under the same roof, it is still common in the Third World.

I'm not being a twatty racist! My grandfather fought Jappers and I have a right to use that term.

Anyway, there are two types of families: nuclear and extended. Nuclear families (common in modern day developed, usually urban or suburban areas) are just the parents and children, with occassionally one grandparent. Extended families however, include not only the parents and kids, but also aunts, uncles, cousins and grandparents living under the same roof, it is still common in the Third World.

I'm refering to the bit about "I personally want to know what it feels like to kill a goddamn Jap!" That kind of thing offends me. I can fully respect your right to use the term Jap, but the way you used it was just a bit insulting. Excuse me for the twatty comment, it was just an emotional response. Also, thank you for explaining what a nuclear family was.

You kiddin' me? The elderly are everything in my family. I was raised by my grandmother. My children get their wisdom from their grandparents while the parents are merely providers and caregivers.

We treat our elders with utmost respect.

I have a great-uncle in a nursing home - which he chose - and not three days go by that I don't sign him out and take him to lunch and twice a month I take him to the movies.

Elders are everything. Period.

I'm refering to the bit about "I personally want to know what it feels like to kill a goddamn Jap!" That kind of thing offends me. I can fully respect your right to use the term Jap, but the way you used it was just a bit insulting. Excuse me for the twatty comment, it was just an emotional response. Also, thank you for explaining what a nuclear family was.

Sorry, I got carried away because it was around July 7th- 68th Anniversary of the Japanese invasion of China. Dates like that drive me all Hitler Youth.