NationStates Jolt Archive

My fellow Americans we are in a time of fear and uncertainty, and somehow things got a whole lot worse. This is one of the most serious problems we face today. I gotta tell you, in the beggining I thought, no big deal, but the issue needs to be adressed now before it is too late.

We have to, as a nation stop saying the word "Cookie."

No Im not joking this sickens me. I cant stand any longer people saying "Good job, would you like a cookie?" Look if you want to say cookie, say something like, "I was eating this great cookie the other day." I can not tolerate any longer, people saying such things as *Hands cookie* or "If you get it right, you get a cookie." But worst of all I hate this saying "Do whaddya want? A cookie?" We must stop this sarcasm and abuse of the cookie. I dont care what you do, but talking like this reminds me of my sixth grade cousin and her stupid friends. Talking about cookies. Its pathetic. So stop this now. I feel like Im back in Jr. High.

Awww have a cookie!

I vote brownies, because then you can get the special ones, which could be worth more. ;)

Let's replace it with "the cheesecake of your choice". (BTW, I've never said "cookie"!) :D

I vote brownies, because then you can get the special ones, which could be worth more. ;)

Yaman gotta love the special brownies. Sends me into a purple haze.

Yaman gotta love the special brownies. Sends me into a purple haze.

You think there should be a thread to vote on this stuff? First, we gotta get more suggestions.

What about "biscuit" or "cracker"?

You know, I have many people owing me cookies from over the years, yet not one has given me the chocolatey, gooey yumminess. They should stop being so deceitful!

The solution is simple. Just link the cookies to 9/11 and start a war. Nobody wants a burnt cookie.

My vote goes to prostitute.

"If you guess it right, you get the prostitute of your choice."

*hands her a prostitute*

Whaddya want? A protitute?

My fellow Americans we are in a time of fear and uncertainty, and somehow things got a whole lot worse. This is one of the most serious problems we face today. I gotta tell you, in the beggining I thought, no big deal, but the issue needs to be adressed now before it is too late.

We have to, as a nation stop saying the word "Cookie."

No Im not joking this sickens me. I cant stand any longer people saying "Good job, would you like a cookie?" Look if you want to say cookie, say something like, "I was eating this great cookie the other day." I can not tolerate any longer, people saying such things as *Hands cookie* or "If you get it right, you get a cookie." But worst of all I hate this saying "Do whaddya want? A cookie?" We must stop this sarcasm and abuse of the cookie. I dont care what you do, but talking like this reminds me of my sixth grade cousin and her stupid friends. Talking about cookies. Its pathetic. So stop this now. I feel like Im back in Jr. High.have a... bagel? scone? Cracker?

My vote goes to prostitute.

"If you guess it right, you get the prostitute of your choice."

*hands her a prostitute*

Whaddya want? A protitute?
Ok this is one idea I can get into...

behind...

under...

support... yeah... I can Support this Idea.

I say, whaddya want? A freakin medal? Cookies are so lame...and cannot be worn around the neck to flaunt your greatness.

Medals it is.

Cookies will last forever, for they now have a stranglehold on the sarcasm and eyes rolling market. Watch out, or Cookiesoft will serve you a cease and desist followed by a lawsuit for defaming their cookieness =p

You know, I have many people owing me cookies from over the years, yet not one has given me the chocolatey, gooey yumminess.
Some black guy dressed in a school girl's uniform offered me "chocolately, gooey yumminess" last time I was taking a night time walk. I agreed, thinking that perhaps he was part of some alternate girl scouts group. 5 minutes later we were standing behind some buildings and then I discovered that the two of us had very different definitions of the word "yumminess."

I don't go on night time walks anymore.

Cookies will last forever, for they now have a stranglehold on the sarcasm and eyes rolling market. Watch out, or Cookiesoft will serve you a cease and desist followed by a lawsuit for defaming their cookieness =p

Lol...

omg

I just got an email from LadyofNight Entertainment. They wanna pay me for advertising, and are offering me protection from Cookiesoft.

They're gonna send me free samples, and I'll be the PR executive.

Awesome.

I'm eating chocolate chip with peanut butter. Mmmmm....

*gives everyone Oatmeal Raisin cookies*

*Stands up and begins walking around boardroom*

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you...

*Lights dim and a TV turns on, and an image fades in*

THE SCONE!

*A scone rotates on the screen*

It's tasty! It goes good with tea! It's like a muffin but BETTER!

http://www.classicpreserves.co.uk/mediac/400_0/media/bite~scone.JPG
It also goes good with clotted cream and jam!

*gives everyone Oatmeal Raisin cookies*

*Munch*

EDIT: 500 posts! Deadly!

All you cookie-eaters are pawns of Cookiesoft, and must be exterminated before you contaminate the world.

*attempts genocide of the pawns, but trips on a rock*

DAMMIT!!!

*gives everyone Oatmeal Raisin cookies*
Yay! My favorite kind! *Munches cookies.*

Um... anyways... teh c00ki3s will NEVER DIE! :p

*Help Barlibgil up while breathing heavily*

Together, we can destroy the cookie menace and rule the galaxy as aquintances.

*Help Barlibgil up while breathing heavily*

Together, we can destroy the cookie menace and rule the galaxy as aquintances.

Ok, I'll go along with that.

So, what do you think for prisoners?

Death by milk vat or death by burning(in an oven)

*While Barlibgil and Buechoria talk, a giant oatmeal cookie(courtesy of Joseph Seal) falls on them and squishes them flat.*

Heheheheheheheheh... TEH COOKIES WILL CONQUER TEH WORLD!!! *Runs off giggling like a nutcase.*

aww, poor baby! have a double chocolate chunk cake, thats way better than cookie!

*While Barlibgil and Buechoria talk, a giant oatmeal cookie(courtesy of Joseph Seal) falls on them and squishes them flat.*

Heheheheheheheheh... TEH COOKIES WILL CONQUER TEH WORLD!!! *Runs off giggling like a nutcase.*

*A LadyofNight Entertainment shield materializes at the last second preventing their supposed "squishing"*

I told you they'd protect me from Cookiesoft's cowardly tactics.

*A LadyofNight Entertainment shield materializes at the last second preventing their supposed "squishing"*

I told you they'd protect me from Cookiesoft's cowardly tactics.
*Secret trapdoor under Barlibgil and Buechoria opens up, sending them falling into a pool of sharks. Cookie-eating sharks*

*Stands up and begins walking around boardroom*

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you...

*Lights dim and a TV turns on, and an image fades in*

THE SCONE!

*A scone rotates on the screen*

It's tasty! It goes good with tea! It's like a muffin but BETTER!

http://www.classicpreserves.co.uk/mediac/400_0/media/bite~scone.JPG
It also goes good with clotted cream and jam!
You sick bastard. NOTHING is better than a muffin!

Do you mock the muffin man?
The muffin man, the muffin man.
Oh do you mock the muffin man?
Whos with your mom...right...now...

*Secret trapdoor under Barlibgil and Buechoria opens up, sending them falling into a pool of sharks. Cookie-eating sharks*

*They levitate out of the pit, he grits his teeth*

Stop..doing..that *laser shoots Joseph Seal*

(lol Colodia, lol)

*Stands up and begins walking around boardroom*

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you...

*Lights dim and a TV turns on, and an image fades in*

THE SCONE!

*A scone rotates on the screen*

It's tasty! It goes good with tea! It's like a muffin but BETTER!

http://www.classicpreserves.co.uk/mediac/400_0/media/bite~scone.JPG
It also goes good with clotted cream and jam!

Too late. Cookiesoft has just bought out Scones inc. All your scones are belong to us.

Legal action is also being considered against the LNE group for engaging in illegal economic sabotage of their operations.

*They levitate out of the pit, he grits his teeth*

Stop..doing..that *laser shoots Joseph Seal*

(lol Colodia, lol)
*Uses Matrix style dodge*

Nevar! *Unleashes an army of cookies and runs away*

Too late. Cookiesoft has just bought out Scones inc. All your scones are belong to us.

Legal action is also being considered against the LNE group for engaging in illegal economic sabotage of their operations.

LNE has called in a government raid on Cookiesoft. All it's executives have been arrested. Cookie Monster ratted on you guys.

You're too late, LNE merged with Scone Inc right before your attempted buy-out. We are now, LadyofSconeNight Inc. Entertainment.

*lasers devaste cookie army, prostitutes "subdue" the rest*

LNE has called in a government raid on Cookiesoft. All it's executives have been arrested. Cookie Monster ratted on you guys.

You're too late, LNE merged with Scone Inc right before your attempted buy-out. We are now, LadyofSconeNight Inc. Entertainment.

*lasers devaste cookie army, prostitutes "subdue" the rest*

Hahaha, the only corporation raided was a dummy. Government agents are embarrassed everywhere and the Cookie Monster now works as a doorstop. Cookiesoft is now buying out LSNE. They have 54% of the total share value now, making them the controlling force of LSNE.

And lasers are useless against their reflective cream filling. Cookies have no urges either so your prostitutes are worthless against them.

Hahaha, the only corporation raided was a dummy. Government agents are embarrassed everywhere and the Cookie Monster now works as a doorstop. Cookiesoft is now buying out LSNE. They have 54% of the total share value now, making them the controlling force of LSNE.

And lasers are useless against their reflective cream filling. Cookies have no urges either so your prostitutes are worthless against them.

The Government busts CS for insider trading. top CEOs are being placed under house arrests(visits to and from Martha are allowed).

As a result, CS assets are frozen. No buy-out.

Anti-cookie sympathizers shoot CS employees, those shareholder's holdings revert back to control by the company CEO. CS no longer has controlling shares.

(who said anything about "satisfying" the cookies; these prostitutes are hungry. lasers are quickly replaced with milk bullets)

The Government busts CS for insider trading. top CEOs are being placed under house arrests(visits to and from Martha are allowed).

As a result, CS assets are frozen. No buy-out.

Anti-cookie sympathizers shoot CS employees, those shareholder's holdings revert back to control by the company CEO. CS no longer has controlling shares.

(who said anything about "satisfying" the cookies; these prostitutes are hungry. lasers are quickly replaced with milk bullets)

Political lobbying and careful use of party donations results in a government reversal on the decision to place CS CEOs under arrest and awards the company billions in damages.

Anti-cookie sympathizers have been placed under arrests and investigations reveal links to sponsored economic terrorism by LSNE corporation. The company takes a public relations nightmare class hit. Shores bottom out and the company sues for bankruptcy. Bid denied by banks and CS co buys out LSNE in all its entirety.

The prostitutes, now unemployed, quickly find work under CS auspices who keep an eye on them to prevent sabotage.

Local diary farms are in uproar over the reappropriation and loss of their products. They begin picketing LSNE anti-cookie defences which are promptly dismantled by their parent company, Cookiesoft.

The solution is simple. Just link the cookies to 9/11 and start a war. Nobody wants a burnt cookie.

Thats a waste. If you give cookies to all the terrorists then we will have world peace. Its a fact known too little that Kaiser Wilhelm and Hitler only wanted cookies but Britain and France wouldnt share.

Let's replace it with "the cheesecake of your choice". (BTW, I've never said "cookie"!) :D

Excellent idea! Would you like a cheese cake of your choice? ;) :D

(Please read title of reply :D)

Oh boy, what's going on? First of all the worst thing that has happened in the last couple of weeks is that the cookie-monster is forced to eat veggies. Bad!!!
He's a monster, he needs cookies!

Why do you object people handing our free cookies (if only verbally)? Did someone catch you with your hand in the cookie jar or which instance has brought this to your extreme attention?

Anyway, I will continue to hand out cookies to those who want one (*does so*) and trying to ban that surely does not earn you any brownie points!

Okay, enough of this - and don't be mad at me for posting this, I might be inclined to console you with, uhm, well, you know, those little round, baked treats :p

*Takes some scones out of the oven and pours some tea*

Would anyone care for some?

biscuit, galette, crumpet, cracker, whippet, tea bun, chewie, ladie's finger.....

I vote brownies, because then you can get the special ones, which could be worth more. ;)
and a lot more fun!

cookie is a forum staple for me. i don't use it in ordinary speech, but online i use the cookie thing a lot... i mean just look at my Location :D

By the way, you can never defeat:

http://img155.imageshack.us/img155/4128/sconesinc0fo.png