NationStates Jolt Archive


Top ten worst uses for superglue:

Lunatic Goofballs
29-06-2005, 22:51
Denture gel.
Furniture Polish
hemorrhoid cream
eye drops
vaginal itch treatment
patching holes in boats.
hair gel
personal sexual lubricant
hand cream
Entertaining bored goofballs. :)
Gambloshia
29-06-2005, 22:54
Personal sexual lubricant, wow. Wouldn't that hurt?
Jibea
29-06-2005, 22:55
How about used in place of bandages, or hair gel?
Lunatic Goofballs
29-06-2005, 22:56
Personal sexual lubricant, wow. Wouldn't that hurt?

Have you ever seen 'American Pie 2'? :D
Pantera
29-06-2005, 22:57
Denture gel.
Furniture Polish
hemorrhoid cream
eye drops
vaginal itch treatment
patching holes in boats.
hair gel
personal sexual lubricant
hand cream
Entertaining bored goofballs. :)

There was a story around my town for a long time. Urban legend I'm sure, but still funny. This lady finds out her husband has been getting drunk and sleeping around. Well, one night he comes home drunk, passes out, and she gets the super glue. Stretching it out, she THOROUGHLY glues the head of his penis into his bellybutton. She then gathers her shit and gets out of town.

And he wakes up with morning wood pulling at his bellybutton. :)
[NS]Ihatevacations
29-06-2005, 22:57
Cat litter
Lunatic Goofballs
29-06-2005, 22:58
There was a story around my town for a long time. Urban legend I'm sure, but still funny. This lady finds out her husband has been getting drunk and sleeping around. Well, one night he comes home drunk, passes out, and she gets the super glue. Stretching it out, she THOROUGHLY glues the head of his penis into his bellybutton. She then gathers her shit and gets out of town.

And he wakes up with morning wood pulling at his bellybutton. :)

YAY! :D
Hyridian
29-06-2005, 22:58
Personal sexual lubricant, wow. Wouldn't that hurt?

watching american pie recently?

EDIT:

dangit! he beat me to it!! lol
Carnivorous Lickers
29-06-2005, 22:59
It would be bad to apply it to a toilet seat in a public bathroom.
Gambloshia
29-06-2005, 23:00
Have you ever seen 'American Pie 2'? :D

I've seen 'American Pie' and 'American Wedding,' but not 'Amercian Pie 2.'
Hyridian
29-06-2005, 23:02
It would be bad to apply it to a toilet seat in a public bathroom.

ow..that suck
Zincite
29-06-2005, 23:04
Hmm. I haven't watched #2, but I thought the, well, apple pie was very funny in #1.
Lunatic Goofballs
29-06-2005, 23:04
I've seen 'American Pie' and 'American Wedding,' but not 'Amercian Pie 2.'

There's a scene where he mistakes a tube of superglue for a tube of lubricant. Everything is nice and slippery for about ten seconds. Then...well... things begin to stick together. :p
Gambloshia
29-06-2005, 23:05
There's a scene where he mistakes a tube of superglue for a tube of lubricant. Everything is nice and slippery for about ten seconds. Then...well... things begin to stick together. :p

:p
Sarkasis
29-06-2005, 23:07
There was this story of a kid who had a pet tarantula (a big scary spider). One day, he fumbles he drops it on the floor, and the poor spider's back is cracked open. With an inspiration, the kid glues the spider's back with superglue.

Guess what, the spider survived!!!!

Wow.

Medical use of superglue.

PS: I once repared a chipped plate... just to have it glued to the table.
JuNii
29-06-2005, 23:09
There was a story around my town for a long time. Urban legend I'm sure, but still funny. This lady finds out her husband has been getting drunk and sleeping around. Well, one night he comes home drunk, passes out, and she gets the super glue. Stretching it out, she THOROUGHLY glues the head of his penis into his bellybutton. She then gathers her shit and gets out of town.

And he wakes up with morning wood pulling at his bellybutton. :)
there's a similar story where a man comes home and finds his wife in bed with her lover, so at gunpoint, he superglues her hand to his Penis.
Gambloshia
29-06-2005, 23:11
there's a similar story where a man comes home and finds his wife in bed with her lover, so at gunpoint, he superglues her hand to his Penis.

Revenge is a bitch, isn't it?
JuNii
29-06-2005, 23:15
guess the movie that spawned this quote
"In one hand, the bullets to the gun. In the other hand, Superglue... A thousand and one uses... now a thousand and two." Pushes badguy out into the cop filled driveway.
Potaria
29-06-2005, 23:18
Eyedrops.

*shudder*
Gambloshia
29-06-2005, 23:19
Eyedrops.

*shudder*


But then you have a good excuse for an eyepatch. :D

EDIT: Sometimes Deadly!
Liverbreath
29-06-2005, 23:21
How about used in place of bandages, or hair gel?

Actually superglue is used as a bandage. Especially usefully in combat surgery and battlefield wounds.
Drunk commies deleted
29-06-2005, 23:22
There was this story of a kid who had a pet tarantula (a big scary spider). One day, he fumbles he drops it on the floor, and the poor spider's back is cracked open. With an inspiration, the kid glues the spider's back with superglue.

Guess what, the spider survived!!!!

Wow.

Medical use of superglue.

PS: I once repared a chipped plate... just to have it glued to the table.
It's actually used medically as an alternative for stiches when the wound isn't too deep. There's a medical brand, not the Krazy glue you find in the local store, but it's still cyanoacrylate based glue.
The Noble Men
29-06-2005, 23:23
I don't think it's viable to apply superglue to your hands prior to working in the morgue...
Lunatic Goofballs
29-06-2005, 23:23
Liverbreath']Actually superglue is used as a bandage. Especially usefully in combat surgery and battlefield wounds.

Yes. I keep a tube in my first aid kit.
Wild Orchid
29-06-2005, 23:27
Not to be used as lipgloss....unless you're particularly "stuck" on a guy!
:D
Liverbreath
29-06-2005, 23:27
Revenge is a bitch, isn't it?

Not really, superglue is not the ultimate glue most think it is. It is a very unique substance for inducing panic, but even in the most sensitive area the cure for it is water. If you get you mouth, eyelid whatever stuck. Soak it in water and it will let go in 20 min or so.
Drunk commies deleted
29-06-2005, 23:28
Liverbreath']Not really, superglue is not the ultimate glue most think it is. It is a very unique substance for inducing panic, but even in the most sensitive area the cure for it is water. If you get you mouth, eyelid whatever stuck. Soak it in water and it will let go in 20 min or so.
Acetone dissolves it off faster. I didn't know water worked on it.
The Noble Men
29-06-2005, 23:28
Liverbreath']Not really, superglue is not the ultimate glue most think it is. It is a very unique substance for inducing panic, but even in the most sensitive area the cure for it is water. If you get you mouth, eyelid whatever stuck. Soak it in water and it will let go in 20 min or so.

Then what is?

Eproxy Resin?

I'm thinking new hair gel formula here, people...
Blitzerlnd
29-06-2005, 23:29
Icning on a cake...XD
Liverbreath
29-06-2005, 23:29
Then what is?

Eproxy Resin?

I'm thinking new hair gel formula here, people...

hahah yer evil
Liverbreath
29-06-2005, 23:31
Acetone dissolves it off faster. I didn't know water worked on it.

yes it does, but it isnt very compatable with things like eyeballs.
Drunk commies deleted
29-06-2005, 23:31
Then what is?

Eproxy Resin?

I'm thinking new hair gel formula here, people...
cyanoacrylate
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cyanoacrylate
The Noble Men
29-06-2005, 23:31
Liverbreath']hahah yer evil

Maybe so, but MY hairgel has a 100% chance of holding forever.
Cape Porpoise4
29-06-2005, 23:34
Acetone dissolves it off faster. I didn't know water worked on it.

I don't know if you have ever worked with acetone, but that does some nasty things to your skin if you get it on you because it sucks all the moisture out of your skin. I got polyester resin all over my hands when I was fiberglassing something and in my own brilliance, poured some acetone on my hands to get it off because acetone is the solvent for polyester resin, bad idea. My skin, which was already dried out, peeled off that night and still hasn't really healed, and that was a week ago. Not to mention that it is immediately absorbed into your liver, which is not a good thing.
Drunk commies deleted
29-06-2005, 23:36
I don't know if you have ever worked with acetone, but that does some nasty things to your skin if you get it on you because it sucks all the moisture out of your skin. I got polyester resin all over my hands when I was fiberglassing something and in my own brilliance, poured some acetone on my hands to get it off because acetone is the solvent for polyester resin, bad idea. My skin, which was already dried out, peeled off that night and still hasn't really healed, and that was a week ago. Not to mention that it is immediately absorbed into your liver, which is not a good thing.
I've never washed my hands in it, but I've used it. I have used methyl ethyl ketone to wash PVC glue off of my hands. That dries them out, but hasn't caused any injury so far.
Amerty
29-06-2005, 23:36
It would be bad to apply it to a toilet seat in a public bathroom.

Eh, that wouldn't be so bad. It would be bad ever to use a public toilet seat without making an effort to clean or cover it, and even if you didn't the longer you sit there the sweatier your ass is going to get. Adhesive isn't anywhere near as effective when you're sweating.
Drunk commies deleted
29-06-2005, 23:38
Eh, that wouldn't be so bad. It would be bad ever to use a public toilet seat without making an effort to clean or cover it, and even if you didn't the longer you sit there the sweatier your ass is going to get. Adhesive isn't anywhere near as effective when you're sweating.
Cyanoacrylate glues, like super glue, actually rely on water to set. A little sweat will actually help it bond faster.
Lunatic Goofballs
29-06-2005, 23:39
Cyanoacrylate glues, like super glue, actually rely on water to set. A little sweat will actually help it bond faster.
That's why it bonds to skin so quickly. *nod*
The Noble Men
29-06-2005, 23:44
That's why it bonds to skin so quickly. *nod*

Hence Jim from American Pie 2.
Keruvalia
29-06-2005, 23:55
Ah ... good ol' superglue ... a prankster's best friend.
Lunatic Goofballs
29-06-2005, 23:56
Ah ... good ol' superglue ... a prankster's best friend.

'Best friend' is a bit strong. But it's definitely in the Hall of Fame. *nod*
Amerty
29-06-2005, 23:59
Cyanoacrylate glues, like super glue, actually rely on water to set. A little sweat will actually help it bond faster.

While it may help it set, do they really stand up to being drenched after setting? And does the salt content not do anything? I've not taken any chemistry just yet.
Keruvalia
30-06-2005, 00:02
'Best friend' is a bit strong. But it's definitely in the Hall of Fame. *nod*

Well it is the most affordable adhesive available with any prank value. Even something as simple as supergluing a quarter in front of the toilet provides hours of hilarity.

However, if you want to have real fun, get some of that wonderful 3M Scotch-Weld and bond your neighbour's tires to their driveway. Hilarious!
The Noble Men
30-06-2005, 00:02
'Best friend' is a bit strong. But it's definitely in the Hall of Fame. *nod*

Then what is?

I nominate eggs.
The Noble Men
30-06-2005, 00:02
'Best friend' is a bit strong. But it's definitely in the Hall of Fame. *nod*

Then what is?

I nominate eggs.
Lunatic Goofballs
30-06-2005, 00:05
Then what is?

I nominate eggs.

Hmm... that's definitely worthy of it's own thread. But off the top of my head, I'd probably say duct tape.
Jordaxia
30-06-2005, 00:06
Hmm... that's definitely worthy of it's own thread. But off the top of my head, I'd probably say duct tape.

Does mud rank anywhere? perhaps not as a means to a prank, but as a messy end?
Lunatic Goofballs
30-06-2005, 00:11
Does mud rank anywhere? perhaps not as a means to a prank, but as a messy end?

I have used mud in many pranks. When I was young, I learned how to dig and cover pits by a friend who was a natural at it. Mud makes an excellent creamy filling. :) But for sheer versatility and construction of elaborate jury rigging of spontaneous pranks, I have to give it to duct tape. *nod*

I think saran wrap comes in a close second.
Celestial Paranoia
30-06-2005, 00:13
A friend of mine thought that super glue would really save the button on her pants. She ended up sans button and her finger glued to her jeans.
Poliwanacraca
30-06-2005, 00:15
personal sexual lubricant


This reminds me of a lovely piece of poetry...

"A young couple named William and Nelly
Spent their honeymoon belly to belly
Because, in their haste,
They'd used library paste
Instead of petroleum jelly."

:p
Perkeleenmaa
30-06-2005, 00:36
While it may help it set, do they really stand up to being drenched after setting? And does the salt content not do anything? I've not taken any chemistry just yet.
Liquid cyanoacrylate polymerizes on contact with anything that contains hydroxide ions. Almost all surfaces are coated by hydroxide ions, due to atmospheric moisture. After it is set, it is simply cyanoacrylate plastic, the same kind some dental prostheses are made of.

Plastics are almost everything-proof, but the problem with them is that they crack when they're worn. That's why durable cups, glasses and tableware are not made of plastic. Plastics also retain some water.
Sarkasis
30-06-2005, 00:52
Top ten worst uses for superglue:
10) As a more tasteful replacement for Egg Beater
9) Cure for baldness
8) Tires with more grip
7) Solution to Michael Jackson's nose problem
6) Solution to Michael Jackson's sexual problems
5) To keep Quebec from seceding from Canada
4) SuperGlue to star in a movie with CatGlue and BatGlue
3) Testing T-fal pans
2) Sticking Washington's obelisk to the Statue of Liberty's pelvis, as a prank
1) Trying to fix punctured glue stick
Dragons Bay
30-06-2005, 02:24
A little bit off topic, but:

Do you always get annoyed when you use superglue and your fingers stick together? It can be dangerous because you may end up in the hospital...for something as small as fingers stuck together by superglue.

One way to avoid this is to first apply skin lotion to your hands and fingers before using the superglue. This method is guaranteed to protect your fingers from being stuck together by superglue :D
JuNii
30-06-2005, 02:47
Don't know why this popped in my head....

fill an empty egg shell with superglue and let it harden.
Israelities et Buddist
30-06-2005, 03:05
10) As a more tasteful replacement for Egg Beater
9) Cure for baldness
8) Tires with more grip
7) Solution to Michael Jackson's nose problem
6) Solution to Michael Jackson's sexual problems
5) To keep Quebec from seceding from Canada
4) SuperGlue to star in a movie with CatGlue and BatGlue
3) Testing T-fal pans
2) Sticking Washington's obelisk to the Statue of Liberty's pelvis, as a prank
1) Trying to fix punctured glue stick
My My someone was on the bored side of the road today. Although I have to admit 2 made me laugh, the mental image was hysterical. I want to know how superglue will help Canada's issues. When I was kids a bunch of us snuk into school and used epoxy to glue all the teachers rolling chairs to the floor and wall. It was hilarous when they tried to move it, one even had to go to the hospital.
Gratze
30-06-2005, 03:11
I like the toilet seat idea, but there needs to be some clarification...instead of coating the seat with glue, put little spots on the seat..5 or 6, that way the person may not notice. Less conspicuous that way. And while I'm on the topic of toilet pranks, why not try putting Saran wrap all across the top underneath the actual seat. That would be some funny shit. haha get it? I had a boss one time that liked to tell stories, and he worked for GM as a trainer way back in the day. He liked to tell the story of his first day on the job. You know those communal hand washer sinks? The circular ones that you step on a little pedal to make the water come out? Well he thought it was a urinal...and somebody came into the bathroom...

Sorry I got off topic...whatever
San Texario
30-06-2005, 03:20
I'll have to agree with LG on duct tape. With the right brand, you can do a lot with duct tape. It is extremely effective when used in large amounts wrapped around something or along those lines. However, if one has the money, Gaffer's tape works even better, cause it is a lot stronger. But, cheap gaff tape can go for 15 bucks a roll. Duct tape varies in quality on the brand, I.E. 3M scotch is usually pretty bad, but I find that after using it a bit and then leaving it around, it seems to improve with age.