NationStates Jolt Archive

What ould you sooner use to repeatedly bludgeon someone to death with?

Steel bar?

Baseball Bat?

Would you sooner use to repeatedly bludgeon someone to death with?

Steel bar?

Baseball Bat?

How about a steel baseball bat?

Crowbar. Nice and heavy, for extra Skullkrak(TM) power.

I simply like the grip of a baseball bat and the balanced swing.

A claw hammer.

Baseball bat. Nicely weighted.

What ould you sooner use to repeatedly bludgeon someone to death with?

Steel bar?

Baseball Bat?


Personally, I would choose a moonbat. More entertainment value. Death by mindless babble.

WTF is a moonbat?

I've got a pine bough for killing goats that has never failed me, but since baseball bats are also made of pine, and my killing stick is about the same length (a bit longer), I'd say the bat more closely matches my taste. Definitely the bat.

Man, am I the first one to bring this up? Absolutely not the baseball bat. I've seen men break a baseball bat, but they can only bend steel, never break it. And bent steel hurts just as much as straight steel. Besides, the blood stains wood easier than it does steel (esp. STAINLESS steel), so absolutno steel object. Although, true, a at would be lighter and it is weighted to get the maximum swinging force. However, on a related note, steel bar always beats metal bat. The steel baseball bat was the best idea yet.

Definitely a baseball bat. The *thok* of wood is so much more satisfying than the *ping* of metal.

Man, am I the first one to bring this up? Absolutely not the baseball bat. I've seen men break a baseball bat, but they can only bend steel, never break it. And bent steel hurts just as much as straight steel. Besides, the blood stains wood easier than it does steel (esp. STAINLESS steel), so absolutno steel object. Although, true, a at would be lighter and it is weighted to get the maximum swinging force. However, on a related note, steel bar always beats metal bat. The steel baseball bat was the best idea yet.

That's why you don't make contact with the weak part of the bat, the seal on most bats. It's still more comfortable and efficient swinging than a steel bar, depending on what kind of bar, of course.

I picked the bat as I sleep next to one (just in case), but if I had to kill someone, it would be a quick slice with my Katana.

I picked the bat as I sleep next to one (just in case), but if I had to kill someone, it would be a quick slice with my Katana.

Is it a...steel katana perhaps? LoL j/k Yeah, my katana and wakisazi are just show blades left over from karate school, so it would be a bludgeoning with a steel bar of sorts. However, my weapon of choice, my (stainless steel?) throwing knives, would definitely do the trick and for all intensive purposes are more versatile than bats, due to range. UNless you're a hardass and you can throw a bat. That's just batass.

Is it a...steel katana perhaps? LoL j/k Yeah, my katana and wakisazi are just show blades left over from karate school, so it would be a bludgeoning with a steel bar of sorts. However, my weapon of choice, my (stainless steel?) throwing knives, would definitely do the trick and for all intensive purposes are more versatile than bats, due to range. UNless you're a hardass and you can throw a bat. That's just batass.

Well if it is steel, then it sure ain't stainless, as there's this odd red stain at the top that just wont come off...

Well if it is steel, then it sure ain't stainless, as there's this odd red stain at the top that just wont come off...

Yeah, I know. I mean, they only buy the "ketchup stain on the pinstripe suit" so many times....

Yeah, I know. I mean, they only buy the "ketchup stain on the pinstripe suit" so many times....

LOL! :D

A cricket bat! A steel bar would jar your hands/arms too much.

A cricket bat! A steel bar would jar your hands/arms too much.

How do you know that?...You used one before, huh?.....lol but I don't agree, although being American I have no clue how a cricket bat handles, or what it weighs, etc., I've only seen it on tv. I just think that a steel bar would bash too hard to jar my arm. Like, crush whatever resistance the skull/bone put up. It would only jar/shock if hit against other metal. And then again, I spent my last two summers hammering away, etc. for a living. So I dunno. Rebar is some heavy, deadly shiite.

Yeah I was about to suggest Rebar, maybe with a comfort grip or at least some tape on one end. A heavy axe handle might work ok as well.

Yeah I was about to suggest Rebar, maybe with a comfort grip or at least some tape on one end. A heavy axe handle might work ok as well.

Speaking of axes...
"Let's say you have an ax. The kind that you could use, in a pinch, to hack a man's head off. And let's say that very situation comes up and for some very solid reasons you behead a man. On the follow-through, though, the handle of the ax snaps in half in a spray of splinters. So the next day you take it to the ax store down the block and get a new handle, fabricating a story for the guy behind the counter and explaining away the reddish dark stains as barbeque sauce.

Now, that next spring you find in your garage a creature that looks like a cross-bred badger and anaconda. A badgerconda. And so you grab your trusty ax and chop off one of the beast's heads, but in the process the blade of the ax strikes the concrete floor and shatters.

This means another trip to McMillan & Sons Ax Mart. As soon as you get home with your newly-headed ax, though, you meet the reanimated body of the guy you beheaded last year. He's also got a new head attached and it's wearing that unique expression of "you're the man who killed me last Spring" resentment that one so rarely encounters in everyday life.

You brandish your ax. He takes a long look at the weapon with his squishy, rotting eyes and in a gargly voice he screams, "that's the same ax that slayed me!"

Is he right?"

That reminds me of some passage in a book that went something like "Was George Washington's axe still the same when it was on its fourth handle and its third head?".

It's an interesting question but a bit off topic.

That reminds me of some passage in a book that went something like "Was George Washington's axe still the same when it was on its fourth handle and its third head?".

It's an interesting question but a bit off topic.

Considering the topic in hand, maybe a bit of deviation is good.

I'd use a good old fashioned axe handle (http://www.hardwarestore.com/media/product/213892_front200.jpg). Affordable, good grip, excellent smacking power.

What ould you sooner use to repeatedly bludgeon someone to death with?

Steel bar?

Baseball Bat?

Tasteful. What's next? What would you use to force someone into submission while you rape them?

i'd say if you had the element of surprise why not use a sledgehammer? if they dont see you coming they'll be down for good with one swing. but if you had to actually attack someone i'd take the metal bar (preferably a jimmy-bar) any day.

Wood or aluminium?

I would say that the steel bar is more efficient, but the baseball bat sure as shit looks cooler to wield.

Wood or aluminium?

Don't know about anyone else, but I prefer wood. It makes a better sound and is doesn't feel as cold as aluminium. Good when you sleep with one by your bed.

Tasteful. What's next? What would you use to force someone into submission while you rape them?

Ooh! That's a good one! Nylon rope or traditional hemp? I'm a traditional kinda guy, myself. :p

Seriously though, there's nothing wrong with irreverent threads on occasion, yes?

Tasteful. What's next? What would you use to force someone into submission while you rape them?


That depends, did I hit them first with a bat, or steel bar?

I've been hit with a baseball bat and it didn't do much but make my scalp sore for the next couple of days. Steel does more damage.

Baseball bat. You tend to 'over swing' with a steel bar and thus lose accuracy.

A rusty old monkeywrench. It can take down anything.

I like the sound of the crack of a baseball bat against the skull, personally.

Assuming I can pick up and properly swing the steel bar that's what I chose.

For the rapin' I would use hemp rope. I'm all about hemp products.

The baseball bat as a much better balance for you to optimise the blow.

Baseball bat more crushing less splicing-I hope....

Assuming I can pick up and properly swing the steel bar that's what I chose.

For the rapin' I would use hemp rope. I'm all about hemp products.
I hope you meant wrap! :p
Why would you want to rape a dead body with rope? :eek:

Pfff, a nice, medium-length, medium-gauge PVC pipe would do best. Sure, it doesn't have true blunt power, but it would be so satisfying to beat the hell out of somebody with it. Lightning-fast strikes and very loud smacking sounds when you hit = severely bruised, reddened skin.

PVC Pipe, damnit!

Id like to use the blunt tool that is your intellect to bash someone to death.

Jokes
um bar definatly

Id like to use the blunt tool that is your intellect to bash someone to death.

Jokes
um bar definatly

You will use the PVC pipe...

*raises pipe above head*

I said you're gonna use that PVC pipe. You better... :D

Bat with 2 nails through it. 'Ol trusty.

a sledge hammer is really the way to go. Weighty, so its nice to swing (unlike steel) but also very sturdy and reliable (unlike wood)

Between those two, I would say a good ol' louisville slugger bat. The crack of wood against shattered skull (particularly the temples or nose) just can't be topped.

Pfff, a nice, medium-length, medium-gauge PVC pipe would do best. Sure, it doesn't have true blunt power, but it would be so satisfying to beat the hell out of somebody with it. Lightning-fast strikes and very loud smacking sounds when you hit = severely bruised, reddened skin.

PVC Pipe, damnit!

Well, now we're on the right track, but everyone's forgetting the Fish-slapping Dance - who the hell has never wanted to bludgeon someone sverely with a 3 foot Atlantic tuna. I also reference Beverly Hills Ninja, cause dual-wielding is the way 2 go!

While I prefer the bat for general purpose bludgeoning, this is bludgeoning to death, meaning that I'm going to have to get rid of the instrument afterwards for saftey reasons. Now a good bat is hard to replace, something I wouldn't want to do and buying a new one leaves a paper trail and takes a while to get the feel of, so I'd go with the steel bar (picked up at a construction site). But for simple feel and the joy of bludgeoning someone the bat is top notch and it better be a baseball bat for murder, the cricket bats are just too broad in striking surface, good for cracking ribs but not for staving in a skull.

I hope you meant wrap! :p
Why would you want to rape a dead body with rope? :eek:
Sorry to say but I did mean rape not wrap. I'm not talking about raping the person I hit with a steel bar but instead just some other unsuspecting victim.

What ould you sooner use to repeatedly bludgeon someone to death with?

Steel bar?

Baseball Bat?

None of the above because I would refrain from bludgeoning anybody, least of all to death. :mad:

BTW, how do you repeatedly bludgeon someone to death? If he's dead, you definitely cannot repeat it! :D

Baseball isn't too common here, so if I carried a baseball bat, everybody knew what I was up to. Steelbar is better because I can pretend it's a tool for working. (It actually can be.) And the steelbar I used was good for stabbing too,
not just swinging. Stabbing with a baseball bat is not quite the same.
I speak from personal experience, I used to work under rough conditions, where I had a steelbar at hand as a tool and abused it as a club or spear when necessary. The baseball bat I had in my car was not satisfactory.

Scenaris - official warning. Discussion of the means and ways of committing murder through blunt object trauma is Not A Good Idea - we don't want to see it, and we most certainly don't want anyone to do it.

That goes for those of you who were discussing rape, too.

~ Tsar the Mod.