NationStates Jolt Archive


Should I move out?

Rasselas
27-04-2005, 19:58
Right... at the moment, I'm in my first year of uni. I live at home, and it takes me about 45mins-1 hour to get to uni each day. Next year I'm thinking of moving into a house with 2 friends, which is only a 15min walk away from uni. I'm in two minds about whether to do it or not - if I move, not only is it closer, but I get freedom (sick to death of living at home).... but it'll cost a fair bit of money (for me anyway, I don't have much cash), and it's in Salford, which isn't the nicest area....

What do you think I should do? Pros and cons of moving out? Help me! My best mate (whos one of the ones I'm moving in with) is in the same situation and we're both being really indecisive.
Syniks
27-04-2005, 20:03
Right... at the moment, I'm in my first year of uni. I live at home, and it takes me about 45mins-1 hour to get to uni each day. Next year I'm thinking of moving into a house with 2 friends, which is only a 15min walk away from uni. I'm in two minds about whether to do it or not - if I move, not only is it closer, but I get freedom (sick to death of living at home).... but it'll cost a fair bit of money (for me anyway, I don't have much cash), and it's in Salford, which isn't the nicest area....

What do you think I should do? Pros and cons of moving out? Help me! My best mate (whos one of the ones I'm moving in with) is in the same situation and we're both being really indecisive.

Well, if you lived in the US, and all the other situations applied, I'd say...Yes, and buy a good handgun for defense whilst in that "not nicest area". But since self defense/physical resistance to violence is largely forbidden/looked down upon in good 'ol Manchester UK, I'd say suck it up and study on the bus/tube... unless you can get away with carrying a cricket bat...
Magnus Maha
27-04-2005, 20:08
two words blow gun....hehe
Sarzonia
27-04-2005, 20:08
You have to think about the reasons you want to move out. Yes, you'd get more independence not having to be under your parents' thumbs, but you'd also have to deal with more responsibility. Namely, you'd have to pay for utilities like electricity, water (perhaps) and heat; you'd be responsible for the phone bill, groceries, maintenance and upkeep of a house, etc. All of those are over and above anything you'd pay in rent.

Secondly, you have to be very careful about who you're moving in with. If you're a night owl/partier type and they're studious or they have to go to work early, there is enormous potential for conflict. If you're a neat freak and your potential roomies are messy, that's going to be another source of conflict. Finally, you also have to decide what to do about food: Do you share food and expenses or is it every man for himself?

Also, I would strongly advise you NOT to move into a flat with your friends. I've seen and heard of too many cases where people go from being best friends to being mortal enemies after living together. I know from experience that can happen.
Whispering Legs
27-04-2005, 20:12
Move out. It's going to happen eventually anyway. It's good training for real life (when you're still in uni).

Besides, you like the aroma of stale pizza, vomit, spilled beer, half eaten dishes of take out curry that are at least a week old, three weeks of laundry from five guys, and the smell of your own feet which haven't bathed in three days because you're too busy humping your girlfriend's best friend between bouts of studying.
Botswombata
27-04-2005, 20:14
Make sure your roommates are the reliable sort & make sure your are the reliable sort as well if you move out. If any of you can't pay it will create strain on your living arangements. Your parents will forgive you for not being reliable. You can wreck friendships over not being able to afdford things. If you move out be sure your ready for it.
Rasselas
27-04-2005, 20:16
You have to think about the reasons you want to move out. Yes, you'd get more independence not having to be under your parents' thumbs, but you'd also have to deal with more responsibility. Namely, you'd have to pay for utilities like electricity, water (perhaps) and heat; you'd be responsible for the phone bill, groceries, maintenance and upkeep of a house, etc. All of those are over and above anything you'd pay in rent.


Waters included, all other bills work out relatively cheap each week. Plus rent is only £36 per week, which is the best I've found (and the house was NICE too which was shocking at that price)


Secondly, you have to be very careful about who you're moving in with. If you're a night owl/partier type and they're studious or they have to go to work early, there is enormous potential for conflict. If you're a neat freak and your potential roomies are messy, that's going to be another source of conflict. Finally, you also have to decide what to do about food: Do you share food and expenses or is it every man for himself?


One of them is on my course and so does the same hours as me. The other is doing a dance course and does similar hours. And we're all the night owl types, so thats not really a problem. We've already discussed tidiness issues and concluded that we're all relatively neat. Food...that's something yet to be discussed.


Also, I would strongly advise you NOT to move into a flat with your friends. I've seen and heard of too many cases where people go from being best friends to being mortal enemies after living together. I know from experience that can happen.

Hmmm....yeah I can see where you're coming from. We might end up wanting each other dead.

Although I'd rather live with friends than complete strangers. Especially in Salford. All sorts of dodgy people about.
Pterodonia
27-04-2005, 20:25
I didn't vote because I didn't feel I had enough information. I guess it really depends on how well you get along with your family. When you say that you're "sick to death" of living at home - what does that mean, exactly? I'd say that if you are capable of getting along with your parents and siblings, you might want to try to stick it out until you're through school. This may be your last chance to really spend much time with them, and you might find that you really miss that closeness later on. Also, you might want to consider that when friends move in together - well, you've heard it said that familiarity breeds contempt? Sometimes it's best not to strain your friendships in that way. Also, you might find that you're not getting much studying done, which is what you're supposed to be concentrating on at this point in your life. Just some points to consider, for what it's worth.

On the other hand, if your parents are as impossible to get along with as my mother was, I would say "quit screwing around here and pack your bags ASAP!" But then, my mother had practically driven me to suicide when I was 18 years old - that's a whole 'nother story that I don't really want to get into here.
ProMonkians
27-04-2005, 20:32
Go for it, even if it turns out crap you'll still learn from it,
The Tribes Of Longton
27-04-2005, 20:46
Dude, do you go to Salford?

Oh, and move out definitely. I live an hour from Manchester Uni, but I'm going to move out.
Rasselas
27-04-2005, 20:48
Dude, do you go to Salford?

Oh, and move out definitely. I live an hour from Manchester Uni, but I'm going to move out.
Yeah I go to Salford

And I'm not a dude :p
The Tribes Of Longton
27-04-2005, 20:52
Yeah I go to Salford

And I'm not a dude :p
Doesn't matter. I call everyone dude. Like a politically correct surfer :)

And I still say 'Fitter Happier' isn't a good song :p
Rasselas
27-04-2005, 20:54
And I still say 'Fitter Happier' isn't a good song :p
Nooooooooooo!! :(
Sumamba Buwhan
27-04-2005, 20:55
everyone is saying "move out" but I say "dont move"

not to be different but because you said that money is tight. Stay home - save all the money you possibly can and enjoy the great things about living at home.

I don't knwo what yoru home life is like but I imagine some of these pro's to staying home are present. I'm sure I am missing good stuff.


free access to washer and dryer
free food
money saving goodness
you dont have to clean the house
free electricity
free water
free gas
free Heating and A/C
did I mention that you could save money?


I know there are cons and the drive sucks but trust me, it's worth putting up with parents and stuff if it gives you a chance to save money.
Bobobobonia
27-04-2005, 21:08
Definitely move out. Living with your friends versus your parents is no contest. Even if you're skint most of the time, it's worth it just to be able to enjoy your life more. Just remember to go out in Manchester and not waste your life away at the Pav every night!
Sith Dark Lords
27-04-2005, 21:09
Move out. I moved out when I was 18 and it's the best decision I've ever made.

It's right up there with important decisions in my life...like wearing boxers to work.
Whispering Legs
27-04-2005, 21:11
Move out. I moved out when I was 18 and it's the best decision I've ever made.

It's right up there with important decisions in my life...like wearing boxers to work.

Or enlisting in the infantry...
Sith Dark Lords
27-04-2005, 21:12
Or enlisting in the infantry...

That's scary. How did you know I was in the infantry?

or DID you know? :suspiciousciaoperativesamfischerlook:
Philionius Monk
27-04-2005, 21:13
As much as I enjoy living near my university, if my school was only one hour away, I would be still living at home.

The money you save could mean that you do not have to work while you take classes.
Whispering Legs
27-04-2005, 21:14
That's scary. How did you know I was in the infantry?

or DID you know? :suspiciousciaoperativesamfischerlook:
I didn't know. But I was a graduate of the Georgia School for Wayward Boys, Summer 1987.
Rasselas
27-04-2005, 21:17
Definitely move out. Living with your friends versus your parents is no contest. Even if you're skint most of the time, it's worth it just to be able to enjoy your life more. Just remember to go out in Manchester and not waste your life away at the Pav every night!

Haha, I haven't even been to the pav ONCE yet :cool: I'm more of a jilly's rockworld kid....

One of the worries that I do have is that if I move out I'll do next to no work.
Sith Dark Lords
27-04-2005, 21:18
I didn't know. But I was a graduate of the Georgia School for Wayward Boys, Summer 1987.

Is that how you got your whispering legs, from all the morning runs?

No idea what wayward boys school is
Syniks
27-04-2005, 21:23
I didn't know. But I was a graduate of the Georgia School for Wayward Boys, Summer 1987.
Feh. I graduated from the Ft.Sill(y) School of Red Leg Friendly Fire Victims in 1986 - after graduating from Mare Island Squid School in 1985 - so I got you beat from 2 sides.

But I must now modify my previous post...

Rasselas, if you move out, take up field hockey and never put down the stick. (though there are a couple of good "flare pens" (signaling devices) available from boating shops that have enough poop to suffice to create a flaming chest-wound if necessary).
Squirrel Nuts
27-04-2005, 21:28
well i'm in pretty much the same situation right now only i've decided what i'm doin. if you can handle working while going to school and can afford everything i say go for it. you might have conflicts with roommates but most of the time it'll work out alright.
Wolfrest
27-04-2005, 21:30
Right... at the moment, I'm in my first year of uni. I live at home, and it takes me about 45mins-1 hour to get to uni each day. Next year I'm thinking of moving into a house with 2 friends, which is only a 15min walk away from uni. I'm in two minds about whether to do it or not - if I move, not only is it closer, but I get freedom (sick to death of living at home).... but it'll cost a fair bit of money (for me anyway, I don't have much cash), and it's in Salford, which isn't the nicest area....

What do you think I should do? Pros and cons of moving out? Help me! My best mate (whos one of the ones I'm moving in with) is in the same situation and we're both being really indecisive.

Its not like your moving in with strangers plus its a closer walk to whatever a Uni is. You can take a Karate class or something like that if you feel threatened about the area of town.

Oh, you mean University. Now I got cha :D
San haiti
27-04-2005, 21:31
Move out. Without a doubt. One of the most valuable things you get from university (debatably even more valuable than the knowledge from your degree) is the experiences of living with friends, fending for yourself and everything that goes with it. You've already missed one year, move out already!
Eternal Green Rain
27-04-2005, 21:56
Move out.
Go home once a week to get a good meal and get mummy to do your washing.
And cadge some cash.
If you hate it you can go home.
Pure Metal
27-04-2005, 21:58
Right... at the moment, I'm in my first year of uni. I live at home, and it takes me about 45mins-1 hour to get to uni each day. Next year I'm thinking of moving into a house with 2 friends, which is only a 15min walk away from uni. I'm in two minds about whether to do it or not - if I move, not only is it closer, but I get freedom (sick to death of living at home).... but it'll cost a fair bit of money (for me anyway, I don't have much cash), and it's in Salford, which isn't the nicest area....

What do you think I should do? Pros and cons of moving out? Help me! My best mate (whos one of the ones I'm moving in with) is in the same situation and we're both being really indecisive.
i say move out. the financial cost is a pain, but the freedom is just excellent and worth it (especially if you don't like living with your parents)

that said, after 2 years of uni i'm probably gonna be moving back in with my parents for a while :( :(
Pterodonia
28-04-2005, 14:03
Move out.
Go home once a week to get a good meal and get mummy to do your washing.
And cadge some cash.
If you hate it you can go home.

Are there actually any mothers out there these days who do that for their grown children? Amazing!!!

Back when I was a kid living at home, my sisters and I were responsible not only for doing our own laundry, but our parents' too. We also had to have the whole house clean by the time my mother got home from work, or face a beating that sometimes left marks - if she happened to be in a really foul mood that day. And I had to cook dinner for the family from the time I was 16 until I left home. And I would no more have asked my parents for money than I would have asked them for the deed to their home. You seriously must be joking!!!!
Ashmoria
28-04-2005, 18:51
the only reason not to move out is money. having a huge debt to pay off once you are out and employed sucks way more than putting up with mommy and daddy.

if it can be done without a huge burden of debt afterwards, do it. if it means years of loan payments, stay home.
Alien Born
28-04-2005, 19:59
The way university is set up in the UK, it is as much about establishing independance as it is about formal education. There are people, in an around London mostly, who stay at home while they study, but to do so is to miss out on some of the important lessons and experiences that uni has to offer.

Salford is not that expensive, and learning to handle a houshold budget whilst still being able to run for cover is good. Learning self discipline with regard to work demands is also better done at uni than in your first job on your career ladder.

Moving in with friends does depend a lot on the people. How will they react to boyfriends? What happens if one wants to quit the arrangement and go back home? etc.

In general I would say move out. You will not be too far from parents and the benefits in life experience severely outweigh the washing machine and the savings that can be made by living with parents.

Time to take control of your own life.