NationStates Jolt Archive

I just had a great discussion with a coworker about the monthly ups and downs many women go through. We were discussing the unkind thoughts about our spouses that infect our brain at this time, and the fact that even though we KNOW we are feeling unreasonable, we can't seem to help it. Then we discussed the fact that menopause (hopefully far in the future) will probably be worse.

My mom has a theory though, that men ALSO go through hormonal cycles. She swears she can predict when my dad is going to be particularly owly (grumpy) each month, and it's like clockwork.

It seems that we humans are slaves to our hormones. We can refrain from acting under their influence, but I for one can't help THINKING under their influence, and let me tell you, I think about leaving my husband over the littlest things when this time of the month comes around. How about the rest of you men and women? Do you have unreasonable times that you KNOW are unreasonable? How do you cope? Especially in terms of your spouse or partner?

Grit my teeth. Awareness helps.

Grit my teeth. Awareness helps.
Yes it does. I used to think that I was totally wacko and purposely thought these hateful things in order to sabotage my relationships and give myself an excuse to get out of them. I figured I was addicted to drama. Well, since the thoughts never seem to go away, no matter the relationship, and since they are completely irrational, and I don't INTEND to think them, I suspect that I'm just being influenced by my hormones. Knowing that makes it easier to tell myself to shut the hell up when I start talking shit about abandoning my husband and children and running off to Spain.

Yes it does. I used to think that I was totally wacko and purposely thought these hateful things in order to sabotage my relationships and give myself an excuse to get out of them. I figured I was addicted to drama. Well, since the thoughts never seem to go away, no matter the relationship, and since they are completely irrational, and I don't INTEND to think them, I suspect that I'm just being influenced by my hormones. Knowing that makes it easier to tell myself to shut the hell up when I start talking shit about abandoning my husband and children and running off to Spain.
Why Spain?

I start talking shit about abandoning my husband and children and running off to Spain.

Frankly though, that is an excellent plan. If I had a spouse and kids, I would probably think about that every day.

Why Spain?
Why NOT Spain? If you can't tell, I have a thing for Latinos and Spanish men...which would be even more irrational since I would be leaving one to seek out another.

Frankly though, that is an excellent plan. If I had a spouse and kids, I would probably think about that every day.
It's just sad that we tend to recall negative things so much more quickly than the positive things.

It's just sad that we tend to recall negative things so much more quickly than the positive things.
Yeah, taking the good stuff for granted.

It's just sad that we tend to recall negative things so much more quickly than the positive things.

I wouldn't know, I am not a woman.

Don't get me started on hormones :D

But to answer the question, I may have certain times where I am more likely to be in a bad mood, but I have never recognised them, as far more predominantly I am in neither a good or a bad mood. I think stress is the kicker for me. I'm far more likely to explode in someones face if I'm feeling stressed, which may or may not be assisted due to hormones.

I wouldn't know, I am not a woman.
I'm making a sweeping generalisation that includes all genders. I am stating that I believe we all do this. That negative events have a more lasting impact on our memory than the positive ones. It's my opinion, but I'm not limiting it to women.

Don't get me started on hormones :D


I've offered before...if someone would just invent the process, I'd siphon off my excess hormones and give them to you!

I'm making a sweeping generalisation that includes all genders. I am stating that I believe we all do this. That negative events have a more lasting impact on our memory than the positive ones. It's my opinion, but I'm not limiting it to women.


Nah, that's just *some* people. I can't bear grudges for example, even when I want to. I just always end up forgiving people. I don't know why, it's the way I am I suppose.

Saying that, when you piss me off, I don't bottle it up. I let it all right out at that point. I never sit on my anger, so maybe the secret is not to try and be a matyr.

I've offered before...if someone would just invent the process, I'd siphon off my excess hormones and give them to you!

I'm sure it'd be all too easy. Is there any way I can answer this without it being horribly spammy? No. No there isn't. But it seems like a win/win situation all round. You have mood control, I have what I want. That's it, I'm calling Bruce Wayne.

Nah, that's just *some* people. I can't bear grudges for example, even when I want to. I just always end up forgiving people. I don't know why, it's the way I am I suppose.

Saying that, when you piss me off, I don't bottle it up. I let it all right out at that point. I never sit on my anger, so maybe the secret is not to try and be a matyr.
BUT...if you are pissed off by something that normally wouldn't bother you, should you go and blow up right then? That's the problem...when I'm all wacky hormonally, I don't necessarily recognise it until after I get back to normal. If I went and exploded every time I got insanely angry about something, I'd be out a spouse. If I give myself time to cool off, and think about it and I'm STILL mad, I'll bring it up...if I start thinking, "what the hell...??" then it probably wasn't a rational issue in the first place and thank goodness I kept my mouth shut!

I'm just glad to know I'm not the only person with evil thoughts in their mind that seem to have little basis in anything their spouse or partner has actually done.

BUT...if you are pissed off by something that normally wouldn't bother you, should you go and blow up right then? That's the problem...when I'm all wacky hormonally, I don't necessarily recognise it until after I get back to normal. If I went and exploded every time I got insanely angry about something, I'd be out a spouse. If I give myself time to cool off, and think about it and I'm STILL mad, I'll bring it up...if I start thinking, "what the hell...??" then it probably wasn't a rational issue in the first place and thank goodness I kept my mouth shut!

Well that's a different issue to negative events having a more lasting impact. I was just saying that, in my case, they don't. (I am sure that some other people are that way too).

As to what actually pisses me off, it depends from day to day. (Except for parking/speeding tickets - those are a constant bane upon my life). But in retrospect, with very few exceptions, I can't really think of a time when being angry was actually worth it over whatever it was I was angry about in the first place.