NationStates Jolt Archive

The other day, my friend whom I haven't had contact with for quite a while contacts me. He says he got into some trouble with drugs, and now owes some people quite a bit of money. He has no way to get this money, and says that if he doesn't have it by Friday, they'll kill him. He also says he's afraid they'll come after his family. He didn't ask me for the money, he only asked me to listen and not tell his friends.

So, being the trusting, concerned person I am, I send him the money via Western Union. I guess it wasn't too much, just $150, but that's all he said he needed. The only thing I asked in return was that he let me know when he picks it up.

It's been two days now, and I haven't heard a thing. I'm not sure whether I should be afraid for his life, or pissed off that he lied to me and ran with my money. Really, if he had asked me for the money for any reason, not just the one he gave me, I would have given it to him. He didn't have to lie, not that he knows that.

My question is...since I have no way to contact him, should I contact one of his friends just to ask about him, even though he asked me not to? Should I just let it go and let him contact me? I'm not quite sure in either direction. Maybe he just took the money, spent it on something stupid, and cut off all contact so he doesn't have to pay me back...?

Or he could have spent the money on drugs and be 'off chops' somewhere. If you have a mutual friend just call them out of the blue and have a long conversation with them. Ask them to fill you in on the news about everyone. Hopefully, this way you can find out what is going on, chat with an old friend, get news about everyone and not raise any suspicions.

The other day, my friend whom I haven't had contact with for quite a while contacts me. He says he got into some trouble with drugs, and now owes some people quite a bit of money. He has no way to get this money, and says that if he doesn't have it by Friday, they'll kill him. He also says he's afraid they'll come after his family. He didn't ask me for the money, he only asked me to listen and not tell his friends.

It's highly unlikely that they will kill him if he just owes them money. How will he pay it back? On the other hand, if he has ripped someone off -stolen their shit for example - then no amount of money will save him.

So, being the trusting, concerned person I am, I send him the money via Western Union. I guess it wasn't too much, just $150, but that's all he said he needed. The only thing I asked in return was that he let me know when he picks it up.

Can't western union tell you if it has been picked up?

It's been two days now, and I haven't heard a thing. I'm not sure whether I should be afraid for his life, or pissed off that he lied to me and ran with my money. Really, if he had asked me for the money for any reason, not just the one he gave me, I would have given it to him. He didn't have to lie, not that he knows that.

My question is...since I have no way to contact him, should I contact one of his friends just to ask about him, even though he asked me not to? Should I just let it go and let him contact me? I'm not quite sure in either direction.

If I were you I would stay out of it. It can lead to no good.

Maybe he just took the money, spent it on something stupid,

Drugs I would imagine.


and cut off all contact so he doesn't have to pay me back...?

Yes, that too.

If he really is a junkie, you aint seeing that money again. The story was probably just a bluff to get some dough so he could score.

If he really is a junkie, you aint seeing that money again. The story was probably just a bluff to get some dough so he could score.

I totally agree with this.

My cousin is a heroin addict and the lengths he'll go to for money are truly astounding. Most of the family don't have anymore contact with him because we got sick and tired of being lied to and stolen from. He's promised to give up drugs again and again, but has never really tried to do it. We still love him and try to keep an eye on what he's up to, but only one of his sisters still has close contact.

Do yourself a favor and wash your hands of the whole affair, and consider this a 150$ lesson in not feeding a junkies habit.

Well, I'd have to disagree. People are killed all the time because they owe drug money. We've had I think 2 deaths last here in Wisconsin (that were reported) because somebody owed somebody else for drugs.

Your friend is in luck thought because $150 for drugs really is quite a small amount, pending on the drug of course. Generally that's not much though.

I also would have to say that you shouldn't contact his friends. His friends (at least some of them) are involved in drugs as well. If you call them, they'll most likely refuse to be compliant or they may make you a priority since you know something. If you do not here from him and weeks or months go by and you're still worried, you might want to consider informing the law enforcement. If you do choose this as an option, you should probably give him only 3-4 weeks before calling. Otherwise you could become too involved in any investigation the police might have to do.

Don't expect to see your money either. If I were you, I wouldn't ask for it back. It's not worth your time.

Well, I'd have to disagree. People are killed all the time because they owe drug money. We've had I think 2 deaths last here in Wisconsin (that were reported) because somebody owed somebody else for drugs.

That is usually because they are in the supply chain themselves though, and take large amounts on "credit" to resell. Then they sell the stuff and blow the money. (Or just waste the drugs).

So it's not really because they owe a pusher some money, but more because they ripped someone off. Think about it, if pushers had to kill everyone who owed them a few hundred dollars, there would be a lot more deaths.

I just can't see anyone getting killed for $150.

Ok if your friend, needs money to pay guys for drugs who say they're going to kill him, then chances are he's a junky and no you won't see that money again. You'll just know next time not to do it again.

The other day, my friend whom I haven't had contact with for quite a while contacts me. He says he got into some trouble with drugs, and now owes some people quite a bit of money. He has no way to get this money, and says that if he doesn't have it by Friday, they'll kill him. He also says he's afraid they'll come after his family. He didn't ask me for the money, he only asked me to listen and not tell his friends.

So, being the trusting, concerned person I am, I send him the money via Western Union. I guess it wasn't too much, just $150, but that's all he said he needed. The only thing I asked in return was that he let me know when he picks it up.

It's been two days now, and I haven't heard a thing. I'm not sure whether I should be afraid for his life, or pissed off that he lied to me and ran with my money. Really, if he had asked me for the money for any reason, not just the one he gave me, I would have given it to him. He didn't have to lie, not that he knows that.

My question is...since I have no way to contact him, should I contact one of his friends just to ask about him, even though he asked me not to? Should I just let it go and let him contact me? I'm not quite sure in either direction. Maybe he just took the money, spent it on something stupid, and cut off all contact so he doesn't have to pay me back...?
If I remember correctly, Western Union can tell you whether the money was picked up or not. Either way, I wouldn't try to contact him or his other friends.

Any time I give someone money, I give it with the idea that it's a gift. I don't expect it back. If they want to give it back, that's fine, but I leave that up to them. Not only does this free both of you from fretting about money and who owes whom, it makes you think seriously about how much money you can reasonably give away ( as opposed to thinking about how much you can lend ), and it also tells you a great deal about your friends.