NationStates Jolt Archive


Appropriate Age of Consent (With Poll)

Bolol
06-04-2005, 23:42
(Yeah, I f***ed up the last one, so here we are again.)

Aye, another thread about sex! But, this could be important. I'd like to know what you guys think the appropriate age of consent should be.

If your choice falls under >16 or <21, please specify and explain. And please for the love of God, keep it civil. No calling anyone "pervert" for thinking a 14 year old can have sex, or a "deprived individual" for thinking 25 is only appropriate. Just...post your opinions.

Thanks much!

-Bolol Survey Team
Drunk commies reborn
06-04-2005, 23:43
17
Celtlund
06-04-2005, 23:45
Does this have anything to do with the Michael Jackson trial? :D
Passive Cookies
06-04-2005, 23:46
Children have the physical capability of having sex at peuberty... average age being 12 or 13, however a child may not be psychologically ready for such a thing until some years after. Although everybody's different, I would say 16 is old enough to know what you want sexually.
Bolol
06-04-2005, 23:47
Does this have anything to do with the Michael Jackson trial? :D

No...
The Return of DO
06-04-2005, 23:49
I lost my V-plates when I was 16 to someone I didn't care about. In some ways I regret it, but it was nice to have it over with someone I didn't care about and then to actually enjoy the experience with someone I did the 2nd time around. However, I do think that 16 is too young to have a child. So, how you solve that problem I don't know.
Kusarii
06-04-2005, 23:50
I say 16 is an appropriate age, that's what it is in the UK and i think it's spot on.

Any younger and I don't beleive people can be mature enough. Additionally, I would say is that this appears to be the age when most people begin to seriously think about sex. Any older and you're just turning curious kids into criminals.
Jibea
06-04-2005, 23:52
As long as you're married and they know what the hell is going on.
Sighard
06-04-2005, 23:54
Id go with 17. nething under that i think is wrong idk why it just seems that people under the age of 17 dont take it seriously enough or just do it for pleasure which i think is wrong unless you are with the right person uk? 17 is also senior year in high school or is right around the corner so ya.
The Return of DO
06-04-2005, 23:57
Did that post make sense?
Potaria
06-04-2005, 23:59
Children have the physical capability of having sex at peuberty... average age being 12 or 13, however a child may not be psychologically ready for such a thing until some years after. Although everybody's different, I would say 16 is old enough to know what you want sexually.

*agrees*

Exactly. And look, 18 is overdoing it...
Sdaeriji
06-04-2005, 23:59
Did that post make sense?

Perfect sense. It's exactly how I feel. I lost my virginity at 14, and while I regret it, I'm glad I lost it so I didn't have to deal with my "first time" any of the subsequent times. The nervousness keeps you from really enjoying it.
Bodhis
07-04-2005, 00:00
I'd say 18 just to be on the safe side. Sure, some people at 16 are more than mature to make choices about sex, but there are others at 16 that are not. On this issue, I will go with the safe choice because it is such a serious thing.
Vegas-Rex
07-04-2005, 00:01
As long as you're married and they know what the hell is going on.

So would that include under 14? Because such people do marry in some countries.

Me, I put 18, just because that's what it is here, as so long as it's somewhere between 15 and 20 I don't really care. The reality of age-of consent law is that it is mostly used to add extra charges onto other crimes. It only really gets prosecuted on its own when parents object.
BrokenWings
07-04-2005, 00:01
I think 16 is appropriate. I know by the time I was 16 I knew what I wanted sexually - and was mature enough to deal with everything it entails.
Bodhis
07-04-2005, 00:04
One more thing, a couple people said they were glad they lost it early to get over all the nervousness..... Do you think if you and your partner were educated from the beginning, you wouldn't have had those feelings? I lost mine at 18 and honestly I wasn't even ready then. Why? Because I wasn't properly educated and the person just wasn't the right person. I think it all comes down to education and finding the right person you're most comfortable with. If you can't talk about it with your partner and if you don't know what the heck is going on, then you probably shouldn't be doing it.

Again, this ties in with why I said 18. At 18, you can talk to your doctor/gyno about these things without any fear of it getting back to your parents. You can go off to college without the tumb of your parent over you and the pressure of your immature classmates.
Random Kingdom
07-04-2005, 00:05
<16, to be specific, no limit. If there's anything I hate in life, it's age restrictions for anything. AGE DOES NOT DETERMINE SKILL, or fertility or size of rod etc.
The Return of DO
07-04-2005, 00:05
One more thing, a couple people said they were glad they lost it early to get over all the nervousness..... Do you think if you and your partner were educated from the beginning, you wouldn't have had those feelings? I lost mine at 18 and honestly I wasn't even ready then. Why? Because I wasn't properly educated and the person just wasn't the right person. I think it all comes down to education and finding the right person you're most comfortable with. If you can't talk about it with your partner and if you don't know what the heck is going on, then you probably shouldn't be doing it.

Again, this ties in with why I said 18. At 18, you can talk to your doctor/gyno about these things without any fear of it getting back to your parents. You can go off to college without the tumb of your parent over you and the pressure of your immature classmates.

Firsty, the guy was 23 so yes, he was educated. Secondly, the first time a girl has sex is different from the first time a guy has sex. It actually hurts us. I could give you more details but I don't want to be gross.
Itake
07-04-2005, 00:06
18. Thats when you are considered an Adult (at least here in Sweden).

Age of Consent law would only be used for trials and such though, in general two people that both agree should be able to have sex whenever they want.
Sdaeriji
07-04-2005, 00:07
One more thing, a couple people said they were glad they lost it early to get over all the nervousness..... Do you think if you and your partner were educated from the beginning, you wouldn't have had those feelings? I lost mine at 18 and honestly I wasn't even ready then. Why? Because I wasn't properly educated and the person just wasn't the right person. I think it all comes down to education and finding the right person you're most comfortable with. If you can't talk about it with your partner and if you don't know what the heck is going on, then you probably shouldn't be doing it.

Again, this ties in with why I said 18. At 18, you can talk to your doctor/gyno about these things without any fear of it getting back to your parents. You can go off to college without the tumb of your parent over you and the pressure of your immature classmates.

No, I don't think so. There's a big difference between reading about it and actually doing it. I don't think it would have mattered how much I knew about sex before my first time, I still would have been nervous.
Bolol
07-04-2005, 00:07
18. Thats when you are considered an Adult (at least here in Sweden).

Age of Consent law would only be used for trials and such though, in general two people that both agree should be able to have sex whenever they want.

Isn't that seft defeating though?
Sarzonia
07-04-2005, 00:09
Since I didn't see a poll option that referred to any kind of qualifiers or provisos, I answered 18 as what I think the age of consent should be. However, my qualifier is that whatever a given society deems as the age of legal adulthood should be the age of consent, whether it's 16 or 21 or whatever else that age could be.

The problem I see is with setting an arbitrary standard and expecting all people to conform to that standard. For every 15 year old who may have the maturity to make a decision about having sex, there is doubtless a 25 year old who is not mature enough, and doing everything on a case-by-case basis would be too prohibitive a task.

However, I think the age of consent should be consistent regardless of sexual orientation. It shouldn't be 16 for opposite-sex couples and 18 for same-sex couples or anything else of the sort. If it's 18 for one set of couples or one gender, it should be 18 for the other.
Dogburg
07-04-2005, 00:13
It's my personal belief that when you're capable of siring children yourself, you're an adult. Nevertheless, there is a lot of controversy about this sort of thing, and some people mature more quickly than others, so what do a few extra years matter to be on the safe side.

Thus, 16 is appropriate as any. However, I really think it's necessary to have just a single age of consent, after which you become an adult. If you're old enough to screw, you're also old enough to go where you want, drive, drink, and smoke what you want, and all the other things associated with adulthood.

Here in the UK, whilst the sexual and marital age of consent is 16, as is the age at which tobacco consumption is permitted, the age at which one can drink alcohol, drive a car and have jurisdiction over one's freedom of movement is 18. This is stupid. I figure that the law should have a clear definition of "minor" and "adult", and that those who are considered adult by law should be granted the rights of an adult.

A single age of consent for all adult activity is a much better alternative to a foggy quagmire of age restriction and legal uncertainty.
Bodhis
07-04-2005, 00:18
Firsty, the guy was 23 so yes, he was educated. Secondly, the first time a girl has sex is different from the first time a guy has sex. It actually hurts us. I could give you more details but I don't want to be gross.

Sometimes guys aren't educated (no matter what their age) about the female side of things and you have to clue them in. ;)

I am a female, so trust me, I know the difference. I know what happens and I know how bad it hurts. I also know that sometimes it takes a few times before it actually feels good for a female.

I guess my point more was that you could be with someone you care about, have sex a few times, and then begin to enjoy it with that person. Why would you have to just pick a person and "get it over with" when this is an option?
Passive Cookies
07-04-2005, 00:23
It's my personal belief that when you're capable of siring children yourself, you're an adult. Nevertheless, there is a lot of controversy about this sort of thing, and some people mature more quickly than others, so what do a few extra years matter to be on the safe side.

Thus, 16 is appropriate as any. However, I really think it's necessary to have just a single age of consent, after which you become an adult. If you're old enough to screw, you're also old enough to go where you want, drive, drink, and smoke what you want, and all the other things associated with adulthood.

Here in the UK, whilst the sexual and marital age of consent is 16, as is the age at which tobacco consumption is permitted, the age at which one can drink alcohol, drive a car and have jurisdiction over one's freedom of movement is 18. This is stupid. I figure that the law should have a clear definition of "minor" and "adult", and that those who are considered adult by law should be granted the rights of an adult.

A single age of consent for all adult activity is a much better alternative to a foggy quagmire of age restriction and legal uncertainty.

I disagree somewhat... I believe that becoming an adult is a working progress, not something that happens all of a sudden on your 16th birthday. As you grow up, you become able to incur more and more responsibility. Having everything become available at one particular age is just asking for mishaps. If you gradually let kids learn the ropes, they'll be far better off for it, hence different sex/driving/drinking ages.
Italian Korea
07-04-2005, 00:32
16 sounds good enough. I have to wonder if that would tie in a whole bunch of statuatory rape charges too, though. don't think anything before 16 is really ready, though 15 is kinda getting there.

here in the US, driving age is 16 (in most places), all other adult functions are at 18, with the exception of drinking at 21. just in case you Europeans wanna know.
OceanDrive
07-04-2005, 00:42
No calling anyone "pervert" for thinking a 14 year old can have sex, or a "deprived individual" for thinking 25 is only appropriate.I hereby declare that all who voted 18> are perverts..and all who voted <18 are sexually deprived...

and if you voted 18 you are both :D
OceanDrive
07-04-2005, 00:44
18. Thats when you are considered an Adult (at least here in Sweden).

Age of Consent law would only be used for trials and such though, in general two people that both agree should be able to have sex whenever they want.
exactamente.
OceanDrive
07-04-2005, 00:45
here in the US, driving age is 16 (in most places), all other adult functions are at 18, with the exception of drinking at 21. just in case you Europeans wanna know.just in case you Europeans wanna know...this guy does not have a clue. :D
Italian Korea
07-04-2005, 00:49
hey.... that's mean!
Ghorunda
07-04-2005, 00:50
Well I'm abstaining from the vote, but FYI here in South Carolina it is the only state where Age of Consent is specified in the state constitution. It lists it as 14, although legislative action makes it 16. But that amendment has yet to be put into the state constitution as far as I know.
OceanDrive
07-04-2005, 00:54
hey.... that's mean!I cant help it...Its like the "Revenge of the Sith".
Afghregastan
07-04-2005, 00:55
I put 14 for several reasons.
One, I was fourteen when I first trying to get sex.
Two, I was fifteen when I actually started getting sex.
Three, my gf was 14 at the time.
Four, we used birth control, never had a broken condom and f@%$ed like wild jackrabbits.
Five, this was the case with many people I knew.
OceanDrive
07-04-2005, 01:01
I'm in Canada, and that's the Federal Law here, so that's what I'm used to.what if you where from Iraq?
...would you go jackrabbits with the same 14 years old GF...or would you get an older one?
Italian Korea
07-04-2005, 01:09
So legal at 14 in canada? wow, that would make me legal.

It seems that the law may by itself make people ready. Self-fulfilling prophecy type of deal.
Afghregastan
07-04-2005, 01:14
what if you where from Iraq?
...would you go jackrabbits with the same 14 years old GF...or would you get an older one?

AHEM!!

Nice how you ignored all my other points!!!

AT THAT TIME my gf and I thought the age of consent was SIXTEEN!!
We both thought we were breaking the law. And then went at it like crazed weasels.
LazyHippies
07-04-2005, 01:17
12
Doom777
07-04-2005, 01:21
18, must be married, and must be heterosexual.
Pharoah Kiefer Meister
07-04-2005, 01:34
I said, 17, Basically because by that age most kids are having sex anyway. Personally I think that sex education is very lacking, because people are offended by the mere mention of sex. I feel that sex education should straight forward and succinct to those being educated. There should be people brought in who explain what the consequences and benefits of having sex are, with examples. Nothing obscene, but factual and truthful information and dialogue. I think the incidents of STD's and early pregnancies would possibly go down if kids were fully informed about sex.

Prior to the age of 15 though under the right circumstances sex with a minor is and should always be against the law. I voice this on another thread and won't go into it here.
Bolol
07-04-2005, 01:38
I said, 17, Basically because by that age most kids are having sex anyway. Personally I think that sex education is very lacking, because people are offended by the mere mention of sex. I feel that sex education should straight forward and succinct to those being educated. There should be people brought in who explain what the consequences and benefits of having sex are, with examples. Nothing obscene, but factual and truthful information and dialogue. I think the incidents of STD's and early pregnancies would possibly go down if kids were fully informed about sex.

Prior to the age of 15 though under the right circumstances sex with a minor is and should always be against the law. I voice this on another thread and won't go into it here.

Perhaps if we expand on sex-ed we may be able to reduce the age of consent in some places, teens being better informed now. Unfortunately I don't see that happening for a while.
Afghregastan
07-04-2005, 01:40
18, must be married, and must be heterosexual.

But could they still @ssfvck?
Santa Barbara
07-04-2005, 01:43
I think 17 is OK, and anyone who has sex before then should just be shot. (Aside from abuse victims.)

Solves most of my issues with this nicely.
Fass
07-04-2005, 01:43
18. Thats when you are considered an Adult (at least here in Sweden).

The Age of Consent here, though, is 15.

A nice age for it, I think.
Fass
07-04-2005, 01:44
18, must be married, and must be heterosexual.

Go back to Afghanistan.
Mentholyptus
07-04-2005, 01:53
I'd say 16. Past that, kids are going to have sex regardless of the law, so it doesn't make sense to ruin their lives with sex crime charges. Before 16, people start running the risk of serious psychological problems. Not saying that's everyone (and doubtless there are some who aren't mature enough for sex at 21), but 16 seems like the age to use as a general rule.
Afghregastan
07-04-2005, 01:54
Go back to Afghanistan.

I don't want him!!
The Sea of Dirac
07-04-2005, 01:58
Where do you get off telling someone else what they can and can't do? When someone starts seeking sex, then they are old enough to have it.
The alternate is to sterilize everyone, and only unsterilize them when they prove they can take a *parenting exam*.
Any law against raping a minor can be done just as well with assault, psychological abuse, physical abuse, harassment, etc.
Doom777
07-04-2005, 02:09
Go back to Afghanistan.
Go back to san francisco.
Doom777
07-04-2005, 02:09
But could they still @ssfvck?
I don't know. Probably not, but I am not sure.
Afghregastan
07-04-2005, 02:14
Where do you get off telling someone else what they can and can't do? When someone starts seeking sex, then they are old enough to have it.
The alternate is to sterilize everyone, and only unsterilize them when they prove they can take a *parenting exam*.
Any law against raping a minor can be done just as well with assault, psychological abuse, physical abuse, harassment, etc.

You have a point. However, children can be easily led by people with greater experience or authority. There has to be a cut off point where coercion is assumed. The responsibility of the state should be to give children full education about reproduction, birth control and STD prevention BEFORE purberty.
CSW
07-04-2005, 02:22
Go back to san francisco.
Go read your bible mate, being online is against your religion.
Gataway_Driver
07-04-2005, 02:23
correct me if i'm wrong but age of concent in holland is 14 and don't they have the lowest teenage pregnancy rate in europe(EU)?
Afghregastan
07-04-2005, 02:24
I don't know. Probably not, but I am not sure.

Oh, come on. You seem to know when people can screw and who they should screw. How come you don't have an opinion of how they can screw. Are you for or against anal sex?
Gataway_Driver
07-04-2005, 02:28
Oh, come on. You seem to know when people can screw and who they should screw. How come you don't have an opinion of how they can screw. Are you for or against anal sex?

depends if its "gay" or not. :rolleyes:
The Sea of Dirac
07-04-2005, 02:29
There has to be a cut off point where coercion is assumed.

This is only true while minors assume that an adult has authority over them. If children weren't brought up to be lambs, they wouldn't be lead to the slaughter. Unfortunately, I don't see a good way to let children be that independent. Still, I'm an idealist, so I'm for getting rid of a lot of legal limits.
Fass
07-04-2005, 02:32
Go back to san francisco.


I'd love to. San Francisco rocks, and the scene there is great.
Doom777
07-04-2005, 02:36
Go read your bible mate, being online is against your religion.
I'm Jewish. Go ahead, find any mention of the Internet in the Torah.
Doom777
07-04-2005, 02:37
Oh, come on. You seem to know when people can screw and who they should screw. How come you don't have an opinion of how they can screw. Are you for or against anal sex?
Personally, against. I wouldn't want to get my penis all dirty with shit. However overall, I am not sure.
Afghregastan
07-04-2005, 02:39
This is only true while minors assume that an adult has authority over them. If children weren't brought up to be lambs, they wouldn't be lead to the slaughter. Unfortunately, I don't see a good way to let children be that independent. Still, I'm an idealist, so I'm for getting rid of a lot of legal limits.

Incidentally, I agree with you about children being too respectful of authority. We wouldn't have half the problems with child molestation if children were appropriately contemptuous of authority. Adult: "If you tell your parents, they won't love you anymore." Child: "F%$K YOU!! I'm going straight to them!!"
Gataway_Driver
07-04-2005, 02:40
Personally, against. I wouldn't want to get my penis all dirty with shit. However overall, I am not sure.

ignorance truely isn't bliss
Bolol
07-04-2005, 02:42
Go back to Afghanistan.

Doom777, I resent you for setting off Fass. Now we'll never here the end of it...
Doom777
07-04-2005, 02:44
Doom777, I resent you for setting off Fass. Now we'll never here the end of it...
Well I resent Fass for being homosexual.
Doom777
07-04-2005, 02:44
ignorance truely isn't bliss
well, i may be pretty ignorant about it. Being only 16, and not married, I obviously never tried any kinds of sex. Including anal.
CSW
07-04-2005, 02:45
I'm Jewish. Go ahead, find any mention of the Internet in the Torah.
Torah then. If people like you ruled the world, we wouldn't have any of this fancy stuff, we'd still be living in caves being scared of our own shadows.
Fass
07-04-2005, 02:45
Well I resent Fass for being homosexual.

Your loss, jealous boy.
Doom777
07-04-2005, 02:46
Torah then. If people like you ruled the world, we wouldn't have any of this fancy stuff, we'd still be living in caves being scared of our own shadows.
No, we would be living in houses, with farms, cities, and some technology. Scared only of G-d.
Doom777
07-04-2005, 02:46
Your loss, jealous boy.
I truely hope that doesn't mean what I think it means.
Fass
07-04-2005, 02:47
Doom777, I resent you for setting off Fass. Now we'll never here the end of it...

Hear, my dear, hear.
CSW
07-04-2005, 02:47
No, we would be living in houses, with farms, cities, and some technology. Scared only of G-d.
Some technology. No internet, no computers, no medicine.

Live like that some time.


God :)
Bolol
07-04-2005, 02:47
Well I resent Fass for being homosexual.

Oh geez...What destruction have I wrought?

This thread wasn't even ABOUT homosexuality! But you two shmucks had to come in here and have a little conflict about it!

Shoo! Get out of my thread!
Doom777
07-04-2005, 02:49
Some technology. No internet, no computers, no medicine.

Live like that some time.


God :)
You don't need technology to be happy.
Fass
07-04-2005, 02:50
I truely hope that doesn't mean what I think it means.

I doubt you do.
Gataway_Driver
07-04-2005, 02:51
well, i may be pretty ignorant about it. Being only 16, and not married, I obviously never tried any kinds of sex. Including anal.
I was refering to your lack of tolerance. Live and let live people
Bolol
07-04-2005, 02:51
Hear, my dear, hear.

Ah, shaddap!
CSW
07-04-2005, 02:52
You don't need technology to be happy.
Says the boy living in an airconditioned house (climate controled at least), on the internet, with a safe food and water supply, cars, bikes, trucks, a much longer life expentancy, and the ability to not have to work extremely hard every hour of your life.
Gataway_Driver
07-04-2005, 02:52
Oh geez...What destruction have I wrought?

This thread wasn't even ABOUT homosexuality! But you two shmucks had to come in here and have a little conflict about it!

Shoo! Get out of my thread!
you got a real cat-fight on your thread now
Doom777
07-04-2005, 02:53
I was refering to your lack of tolerance. Live and let live people
As Bolol said: wrong thread, wrong time.
Doom777
07-04-2005, 02:54
Says the boy living in an airconditioned house (climate controled at least), on the internet, with a safe food and water supply, cars, bikes, trucks, a much longer life expentancy, and the ability to not have to work extremely hard every hour of your life.
Sure it's NICE to live with high level technology, but I can assure you that the Jews 2-3 thousands years ago were just as happy as an average person today.
CSW
07-04-2005, 02:54
Sure it's NICE to live with high level technology, but I can assure you that the Jews 2-3 thousands years ago were just as happy as an average person today.
You do it. Get back to me in 50 years, if you aren't dead (most likely). I'll keep the technology. Have fun.
Doom777
07-04-2005, 02:57
You do it. Get back to me in 50 years, if you aren't dead (most likely). I'll keep the technology. Have fun.
You don't understand. Living with the knowledge that you CAN have the ease of technology, is not the same as living without even knowing of air conditioners, etc. Hell, in 100 years people will have a lot more technology than today. Does that mean that noone today is happy, or that in 100 years, people will be happier?
Gataway_Driver
07-04-2005, 02:58
Emotionally i don't think the average 15 knows / understands the concept of what sexual intercourse may have on their lives ans i think lots of 16 year olds are not either but there has to be a cut off and i'd go with 16
CSW
07-04-2005, 02:59
You don't understand. Living with the knowledge that you CAN have the ease of technology, is not the same as living without even knowing of air conditioners, etc. Hell, in 100 years people will have a lot more technology than today. Does that mean that noone today is happy, or that in 100 years, people will be happier?
It means in 100 years, people will be happier. If we followed what you did, we'd be living shorter lives and working hard our entire lives. You support that ideal, put your money where your mouth is and do the rest of us a favor. Go live in a cave and see how fun it is.
Bolol
07-04-2005, 03:01
Emotionally i don't think the average 15 knows / understands the concept of what sexual intercourse may have on their lives ans i think lots of 16 year olds are not either but there has to be a cut off and i'd go with 16

Thank you for attempting to get back on track.

That seems like an interesting argument. But I gotta tell you I've seen some pretty mature 15 year olds.
Doom777
07-04-2005, 03:02
It means in 100 years, people will be happier. If we followed what you did, we'd be living shorter lives and working hard our entire lives. You support that ideal, put your money where your mouth is and do the rest of us a favor. Go live in a cave and see how fun it is.
So you think happiness resides in working less and living more?
Fass
07-04-2005, 03:03
Ah, shaddap!

"Shut up," my dear. :p
CSW
07-04-2005, 03:05
So you think happiness resides in working less and living more?
Most people would agree...

(Or rather, not being forced to work 15 hour days on the farm to survive)
Doom777
07-04-2005, 03:05
We could keep this argument up, but Bolol doesn't like us to, so I'm stopping. From now on: all arguments on this thread are age consent related.
Incenjucarania
07-04-2005, 03:08
It's a really messy situation. You almost should have to have a test for it.

I myself was easily smart enough to deal with sex when I was 16, but my emotional maturity was stunted a bit (late bloomer), to the point that until I was 18, and announced and admitted to myself that I did, in fact, like girls, my mother actually wished I was at least GAY or something so she'd know I wasn't unsexual abnormality (I still have no idea how to take that). When I hit twenty, a bit before turning twenty-one (Three months...), I finally lost my virginity, to someone who had lost it a year before, at age 17.

Now, at age 23 (since a month ago), there's a young woman in my life who has been angry at me since last November, because I won't have sex with her (She's had sex since her EARLY teens, some of which she's regretted, and has had sex since we broke up). While she's fairly mature in a very chaotic manner (She's been a college student since she was 16). She's still 17.

So, figure this out. She's had gads more sex than I have. So, realistically, she's more sexually mature than I am. My sexual experience was a week, with maybe four actual events, not all of which even worked properly (90% of it was, well, she was WAY too damned tight...).

However, the local law is that I'm too old to do anything with her until she turns 18 in October, because of the concept that I'll be taking advantage of her youth.

...And this is why I'm a very cranky, cold-hearted, irritable person...

Mental Age vs. Physical Age + Local Law= Thank goodness for my supreme self-control + Why the bloody hell can't I seem to run in to any slightly OLDER women...
Doom777
07-04-2005, 03:11
It's a really messy situation. You almost should have to have a test for it.

I myself was easily smart enough to deal with sex when I was 16, but my emotional maturity was stunted a bit (late bloomer), to the point that until I was 18, and announced and admitted to myself that I did, in fact, like girls, my mother actually wished I was at least GAY or something so she'd know I wasn't unsexual abnormality (I still have no idea how to take that). When I hit twenty, a bit before turning twenty-one (Three months...), I finally lost my virginity, to someone who had lost it a year before, at age 17.

Now, at age 23 (since a month ago), there's a young woman in my life who has been angry at me since last November, because I won't have sex with her (She's had sex since her EARLY teens, some of which she's regretted, and has had sex since we broke up). While she's fairly mature in a very chaotic manner (She's been a college student since she was 16). She's still 17.

So, figure this out. She's had gads more sex than I have. So, realistically, she's more sexually mature than I am. My sexual experience was a week, with maybe four actual events, not all of which even worked properly (90% of it was, well, she was WAY too damned tight...).

However, the local law is that I'm too old to do anything with her until she turns 18 in October, because of the concept that I'll be taking advantage of her youth.

...And this is why I'm a very cranky, cold-hearted, irritable person...

Mental Age vs. Physical Age + Local Law= Thank goodness for my supreme self-control + Why the bloody hell can't I seem to run in to any slightly OLDER women...
It is natural for men to seek slightly younger female partners.
Draconic Order
07-04-2005, 03:12
people were only getting married and having sex in the 14-15s way back in the middle ages and before because of the short lifespans and that it was accepted then... today its like 18+ because of religion, adults thinking that children are children until 18+ and should be protected or something, and the fact that we have much longer life spans... plus the basic education goes to about 18+ and we want you to finish that before having kids (simpler time really long ago).
The Lynx Alliance
07-04-2005, 03:18
i think that the law here states that you have to be 16 for concent to sex with someone more that 2 years older than you, and i agree with that. i have no problem with 13 - 15.9999 year olds, or at least those that are kind of mature in that area, having sex, but at least with the way that law is set up, if you are 13, it would be with a 15 year old, instead of say a 22 year old
Gataway_Driver
07-04-2005, 03:22
Thank you for attempting to get back on track.

That seems like an interesting argument. But I gotta tell you I've seen some pretty mature 15 year olds.
but there's the other end of the spectrum, to me they are still kids and some of them will have definite attributes of children. Anyway the mature side will do it anyway while the less mature side will play games , win/win except if the sexual partner is 16+. Whats the crime?
Blackpebble
07-04-2005, 03:25
Thank you for attempting to get back on track.

That seems like an interesting argument. But I gotta tell you I've seen some pretty mature 15 year olds.

While I agree that there are some very emotionally mature 15 year olds, I find the average populace to be emotionally unstable at this age, and I do believe that waiting until someone is 16, allows for a bit more development of self confidence which enables many to be able to turn around and tell everyone to ‘fuck off’ if they are not interested, and at the very least does not allow them to give into ‘peer pressure’ as much.

Also, most sexual education actually seems to sink into someone’s head at around this age, helping him or her to understand the consequences. Ultimately though, I think it depends upon the person and there life experiences, after all I have met immature 21 year olds and 16 year olds that could rival many of our so called mature ‘standards’ in my opinion at least!
Doom777
07-04-2005, 03:27
Well, I gotta say, if it wasn't for the religious angle, I would also say 15/16.
The Lynx Alliance
07-04-2005, 03:30
Well, I gotta say, if it wasn't for the religious angle, I would also say 15/16.
there was a religious angle in here? and i missed it? damn
Blackpebble
07-04-2005, 03:33
there was a religious angle in here? and i missed it? damn

I am afraid that I am not very well versed upon religion myself, having been an atheist all my life and therefore I avoid commenting on all such things, after all what right do I have to say ‘that’s wrong’ when I know nothing about it?

So therefore I stick to my own opinion about sex being okay at 16 years old, in accordance with my own life experiences.

Also a ‘religious angle’ can give us another view upon this issue, if it was explained further.
Amiera
07-04-2005, 03:48
i think with the way things are setup at the moment, people dont truly underdstand the reality of the decision they are making until they are around 18. yes i understand that some people are mature enough to make such decisions at a younger age, but some people dont understand the consequences until thy are in their 20s.
i would say that the age could be lowered if sex-ed were to become more indepth and over a longer period of time, because i personally went all through grade-school and high school with no sex-ed through the schools.
so my vote goes to at the youngest 18, at least until teenagers are thoroughly educated in such matters
OceanDrive
07-04-2005, 03:53
i think that the law here states that you have to be 16 for concent to sex with someone...what country/state is "here"?
OceanDrive
07-04-2005, 03:56
people were only getting married and having sex in the 14-15s way back in the middle ages and before because of the short lifespans and that it was accepted then... today its like 18+ because of religion, adults thinking that children are children until 18+

Interesante....until what age should you be considered "children" ???
Blackpebble
07-04-2005, 03:58
i think with the way things are setup at the moment, people dont truly underdstand the reality of the decision they are making until they are around 18. yes i understand that some people are mature enough to make such decisions at a younger age, but some people dont understand the consequences until thy are in their 20s.
i would say that the age could be lowered if sex-ed were to become more indepth and over a longer period of time, because i personally went all through grade-school and high school with no sex-ed through the schools.
so my vote goes to at the youngest 18, at least until teenagers are thoroughly educated in such matters

That’s a very interesting opinion, and in some aspects I agree, however I myself went through sex ed in school at a reasonably young age and was further lectured once I entered the upper years of my schooling , and found it to be most helpful, it gave me the run down on diseases, birth control etc.

I can understand waiting until you are 18 to have sex, however there are many that are mature enough to engage in this act before such an age. I believe 18 is to long to wait and causes people to make rash decisions when they reach the designated age. So I think that 16 is a good age, as you are finally starting to understand your independence. However again it comes down to life experiences. (In my opinion)
Manawskistan
07-04-2005, 05:11
18. A 16 year old 'in love' is not the same as an 18 year old. I know this from first hand experience. Quite a few people I have known thought getting married to the person that they dated for a year in highschool and that having their children would solve the problems in their own disjointed families.

Guess how well that flew?

Personally, I think the 'age of consent' should just be used as a defence mechanism of the government to keep predatory types away from the children. 16 year olds are going to hook up with 16 year olds and hump like rabbits, just like 16 year olds go out and get cigarettes or get beer.
Blackpebble
07-04-2005, 05:33
18. A 16 year old 'in love' is not the same as an 18 year old. I know this from first hand experience. Quite a few people I have known thought getting married to the person that they dated for a year in highschool and that having their children would solve the problems in their own disjointed families.

Guess how well that flew?

Personally, I think the 'age of consent' should just be used as a defence mechanism of the government to keep predatory types away from the children. 16 year olds are going to hook up with 16 year olds and hump like rabbits, just like 16 year olds go out and get cigarettes or get beer.

I have been dating my boyfriend since I was sixteen, and I know for a fact that having a child will not increase your chance of staying together, however this knowledge does not come with age, there are many people (of all ages) that have children in hope of keeping there partner ensnared into a relationship, as you probably know it doesn’t work.

Perhaps were viewing this the wrong way? After all I believe that a 30 year old should not be allowed to date a 16 year old. After all if it is ‘true love’ as so many claim then they will be willing to wait for the person to grow up.

So perhaps there should be another law, which says you can only have sex with people no more than five years older than you until you reach 18? But then again this still has many flaws, ah well its just another on of my weird opinions.
Rysonia
07-04-2005, 05:33
I said 17 as a general estimate of somewhere between 16-18. In other words I don't think younger then 16 (I am totally against that) but haven't really formed a complete opinion on the matter of 16-18 so hedged my bets.

And I think that a proviso of mentally capable should be included. You know if the person's mind is 13 then they are to young no matter how old they are physically. Which I do believe most conutries already have in affect.
Blackpebble
07-04-2005, 05:37
I said 17 as a general estimate of somewhere between 16-18. In other words I don't think younger then 16 (I am totally against that) but haven't really formed a complete opinion on the matter of 16-18 so hedged my bets.

And I think that a proviso of mentally capable should be included. You know if the person's mind is 13 then they are to young no matter how old they are physically. Which I do believe most conutries already have in affect.

I agree, there should be a testing upon someone’s mental age, after all it has a large part to play in the whole what age are you ready to have sex? Thing, but on the same token having intercourse is also a learning experience that helps you to develop mentally.
Manawskistan
07-04-2005, 05:46
I have been dating my boyfriend since I was sixteen, and I know for a fact that having a child will not increase your chance of staying together, however this knowledge does not come with age, there are many people (of all ages) that have children in hope of keeping there partner ensnared into a relationship, as you probably know it doesn’t work.

Perhaps were viewing this the wrong way? After all I believe that a 30 year old should not be allowed to date a 16 year old. After all if it is ‘true love’ as so many claim then they will be willing to wait for the person to grow up.

So perhaps there should be another law, which says you can only have sex with people no more than five years older than you until you reach 18? But then again this still has many flaws, ah well its just another on of my weird opinions.

Right, if a person has the mental capacity to understand that you don't have to marry someone right away to love them, then more power to them. It's perfectly possible for someone to meet their one true love at 16 years old and go on and have a wonderful life. Lots of people don't, and statistically, that's what matters. Sixteen year olds who are mature enough to separate love from infatuation are indeed mature enough to realize that getting married before reaching legal adult status (Not in terms of sexual activity, but voting age, so on...) isn't going to make them love each other any more.

In fact, a particularly shrewd young couple would certainly not marry until they absolutely had to when the parents are no longer permitted to hold them under their financial umbrella. Getting married removes you from any and all dependencies and insurance policies in the States, which adds a financial hardship to all of the other problems teenage marriages and pregnancies already have. Teenagers aren't well known for being able to get jobs that offer full benefits for him/herself and a spouse. Those are usually reserved for those with 'experience.'

Alas, I digress. This isn't a thread about marriage, rather a thread about the carnal pleasures which are entitled to the parties therein ;) In a perfect God Fearing world (bahaha) nobody would get their freak on with another until they were married, had a home established, and were financially secure. If that's the way it actually worked, this would be a very boring planet. I'd change my name to Obadiah and start working on my neckbeard (only after marriage of course, having a beard before marriage is a sin, right Amish folk? Oh wait...) The universally accepted age of 'adulthood' in the USA is 18 years old. At this point you can go vote, separate from your parents dependency if you so desire, Buy your weapon :p , Serve in the military (enlistment only at this point, you've got to have a degree to be an officer), get drafted if you don't feel like joining up... I could go on for a page. It seems only right, proper, and bureaucratic enough to say that 18 is a good time for getting naked and commencing with the friction. Are there people who are 16 and can handle the responsibilities of sexual activity? Hell yes there are. There are probably some 12 year olds out there that can handle the responsibilities of sexual activity better than some college students. What government has to do is strike a balance. Everyone figures out at one point in time or another what sex is all about. It's up to the government to figure out statistically when it's safe to turn the population loose on each other and not fear the repercussions in the elections or in the welfare system (mostly by angred older parents and younger parents who can't take care of kids they weren't planning for). Again, 16 is a good number, but hell, why not buy some votes from the Religious Right and say 18? Of course, you must understand that the Religious Right thinks even 18 is poppycock because nobody should have sex before marriage (even though such a thing isn't exactly directly condemned in the Bible)

I think the current age of consent laws really really bone the fellows that are 16 or so and have a girlfriend that is... say... 15. One year's difference, but that's technically statutory rape even if she says yes. That's BS in my eyes. I like the idea of having there be some sort of math equation involved, but that may be a bit much for my countrymen to wrap their minds around at this point ;)
Incenjucarania
07-04-2005, 05:50
It is natural for men to seek slightly younger female partners.


Didn't seek her.

She sought me.

Fortunately or unfortunately, we're broken up now, so its moot, but at the time.. ach.
Blackpebble
07-04-2005, 05:54
Right, if a person has the mental capacity to understand that you don't have to marry someone right away to love them, then more power to them. It's perfectly possible for someone to meet their one true love at 16 years old and go on and have a wonderful life. Lots of people don't, and statistically, that's what matters. Sixteen year olds who are mature enough to separate love from infatuation are indeed mature enough to realize that getting married before reaching legal adult status (Not in terms of sexual activity, but voting age, so on...) isn't going to make them love each other any more.

In fact, a particularly shrewd young couple would certainly not marry until they absolutely had to when the parents are no longer permitted to hold them under their financial umbrella. Getting married removes you from any and all dependencies and insurance policies in the States, which adds a financial hardship to all of the other problems teenage marriages and pregnancies already have.

I think the current age of consent laws really really bone the fellows that are 16 or so and have a girlfriend that is... say... 15. One year's difference, but that's technically statutory rape even if she says yes. That's BS in my eyes. I like the idea of having there be some sort of math equation involved, but that may be a bit much for my countrymen to wrap their minds around at this point ;)

Actually, I have been living out of home for quite a while (with my BF lol) and it is a hardship, although I have no intentions of getting married, after all I don’t need a piece of paper to tell me whom I love. Also I don’t want the hassle of a wedding! :D

I agree, that is ridiculous, one years difference, should not be considered rape, (as long as the both persons consent). But it would be hard for such a new law to be enforced. Due to religious, political etc ideas and objections.
Dempublicents1
07-04-2005, 05:56
It is natural for men to seek slightly younger female partners.

To better control them?
Zach Landia
07-04-2005, 06:02
I believe that everyone is emotionaly ready at different times, but as far as the state is concerned, I think 18 is the right age. I'm 16, and I'm sure as hell not ready to have sex, but that's more of a religious thing. But I know people who shouldn't be having sex, who have had sex, and cried afterword. Then again, I know a guy who, when he was 14, did a 12 year old. Didn't seem to affect him much, but I do think that he is a little lacking in restraint when it comes to girls.
Manawskistan
07-04-2005, 06:04
To better control them?

I don't want an old woman being the mother of my children! I want her to be as young and vibrant as possible, that way I know I won't be getting Down's babies and the mother will be in good enough health to take care of them and not dying of old age at a really inopportune time.

Kind of Darwinistic, really.
Dempublicents1
07-04-2005, 06:08
I don't want an old woman being the mother of my children! I want her to be as young and vibrant as possible, that way I know I won't be getting Down's babies and the mother will be in good enough health to take care of them and not dying of old age at a really inopportune time.

While age may increase the chances of chromosomal defects, a 16 year old could possibly have them occur. This is especially true when you consider the fact that a great number of miscarriages are caused by various genetic defects (and people of all ages have them).
The Plutonian Empire
07-04-2005, 08:27
I"d reduce it to 13, because that is around the time that most, not all, but most, people attain the ability to reproduce.
The Lynx Alliance
07-04-2005, 08:53
what country/state is "here"?
new south wales, in australia, but i think it goes for most states here. some have it set as 17 (i think South Australia).
Kelleda
07-04-2005, 09:12
Hooray for arbitrary limitations! *hurk* *khaaaaan!*

However, in the interest of not wasting taxpayer money and time, some sort of arbitrary limit pretty much needs to be set.

Anyone under fifteen is pretty much guaranteed to not be able to actually contemplate the consequences of sexual intercourse in whatever form, and would have trouble going about it properly.

However, an age of consent over seventeen does little more than spur on the predation of the law upon people that don't necessarily deserve it by vengeful parents/guardians. (NOTE: This is not to say that parents should be deprived of all power, or even to be relieved of a moderate minority of power - but their share certainly should not be absolute, since the emotional links within the family, and the beliefs of the individual, can jam up the brainmeats during reason-driven thought.)

I suppose an individual between those ages could be given an opportunity to prove themselves knowledgeable in the eyes of the law, but I have no clue as to how.
The Lynx Alliance
07-04-2005, 09:40
Anyone under fifteen is pretty much guaranteed to not be able to actually contemplate the consequences of sexual intercourse in whatever form, and would have trouble going about it properly.
i know of people over this age, even goin into their late 20s that cant contemplate the consequences
Renshahi
07-04-2005, 09:51
With girls, I figure it should be what ever age her parents marry her off at. Guys,( not counting consorts or prostitutes), whe they are finacially stable on their own.
Nieder Ostland
07-04-2005, 10:01
Whenever someone is ready for it. Thou, I don't think boys and gals under 15 are ready (thou that is HIGHLY individual). But remember kids. Always use a condom! (unless you WANT to have kiddies of course! )

As for younger men, older women, that is actually, naturally the best way.
Coz men reach their sexual peak at around 22 - 27, and women have their sethxual peak at 30 - 35.
And, by sexual peak, i do not mean when they have most sex or anything, but rather when it's the best chance to get a baby.
The Return of DO
07-04-2005, 11:13
Sometimes guys aren't educated (no matter what their age) about the female side of things and you have to clue them in. ;)

I am a female, so trust me, I know the difference. I know what happens and I know how bad it hurts. I also know that sometimes it takes a few times before it actually feels good for a female.

I guess my point more was that you could be with someone you care about, have sex a few times, and then begin to enjoy it with that person. Why would you have to just pick a person and "get it over with" when this is an option?

I didn't exactly pick him. I was blind drunk, so you know, fun. However, the first time with my boyfriend who I care about very deeply was great, so it all worked out in the end.
Honey Badgers
07-04-2005, 11:59
16 is the age of consent where I live, and I think that's reasonable. In Denmark it's 14, and there has been a debate about lowering the age of consent here, too. I think 14 is too early, though, since it would probably increase the pressure on young girls from older guys, and that's bad enough already.
Findecano Calaelen
07-04-2005, 12:32
Well, I gotta say, if it wasn't for the religious angle, I would also say 15/16.
I would agree with that, except I dont give a rats about the religious angle.

I've met 15 year olds who have been mature enough and are sexually active others are not, im yet to meet a 14 year old who is but they are probably out there.
OceanDrive
08-04-2005, 03:12
i know of people over this age, even goin into their late 20s that cant contemplate the consequences
exactamente
OceanDrive
08-04-2005, 03:15
With girls, I figure it should be what ever age her parents marry her off at. Guys,( not counting consorts or prostitutes), when they are finacially stable on their own.
That makes sense.
Wong Cock
08-04-2005, 05:55
Why don't we lump age of consent, voting age, criminal responsibility age, drinking, smoking, shooting and driving age all together?
Doom777
08-04-2005, 06:02
Didn't seek her.

She sought me.

Fortunately or unfortunately, we're broken up now, so its moot, but at the time.. ach.
Well, young women also often seek older men. It isn't as strange for a 20 year old woman to hook up with a 30 year old guy, as it is for a 30 year old woman to hook up with a 20 year old guy.
Wong Cock
08-04-2005, 06:02
yes i understand that some people are mature enough to make such decisions at a younger age, but some people dont understand the consequences until thy are in their 20s.


Well, I don't think any US President understands the consequences of their Foreign Policy. If they would, we wouldn't have had 9/11 (during Bush's time in office).
Doom777
08-04-2005, 06:04
To better control them?
/me bangs on keyboard in frustration and despair

Stop looking for chauvinism in EVERY LITTLE THING! And keep these talks to women's movement threads, not Age of Consent threads.
Doom777
08-04-2005, 06:04
Well, I don't think any US President understands the consequences of their Foreign Policy. If they would, we wouldn't have had 9/11 (during Bush's time in office).
Well, I personally think that if your last name if George, and last name Bush, then the age of consent for you is 95.