NationStates Jolt Archive


Bite Me 7-11

Jaythewise
30-03-2005, 00:16
This is a funny story, could have ended up being very shitty though..

YEARS ago, about 6 to be exact I was out drinking. Me and some friends went across the street to a 7-11 from the club we are at to get smokes (i dont) and some munchies.

Basically, i am a little drunk but still very coherant and lucid. Had about 6 beer, so nothing major. When I get a little drunk I tend to become stupid.

Basically, I had gone up to the register to purchase a drink and in my hand I had a pack of gum. Stupid me I forgot to pay for the gum. I walk out with the "stolen" gum and my purchased drink.

A minute later some knucklehead with a texmex cowboy getup (even had spurs on :rolleyes: :rolleyes: seriously! he did!!) runs after me and my friends yelling at me " YOU ARE UNDER ARREST"

I yell back " are you stupid, for what?"

Texmex responds " YOU STOLE THAT GUM!!!"

Me "ummm ok sorry i will go pay for it now!"

Texmex " NO your under arrest, your coming with me NOW!!!"

Then the guy grabs my arm and pulls out some hangcuffs. iIbreak out of his grasp and cock my fist.

My friends start yelling out " kick his FUCKIN ASS JAY!!! AHAHAHAHAH"

Texmex responds by saying I will hunt you down if you try and get away!! in a low serious voice. TO which some of my friends find very very funny and one of my HUGE friends (who is insanly drunk and stoned) whips out his DICK and starts waving it around yelling " arrest me sheriff!!!"

Of course one of my friends laughs so hard he pees his pants and texmex looks lke he is going to snap.


Since I am not so drunk I decide fuck it and go in with the guy. I give texmex a fake name and sit in to wait. After waiting for a hour the cops come, i give the cops my real name to which texmex gets mad and grabs me.
" i put up with all that BS and you give me a fake name " he yells at me, to which i respond
" I dont give shit what some dork security guard asks of me fucknuts"
The cops then have to pull the guy off me.


Then they arrest the security guard and give me a weird citation for petty theft. ( I had to pay $20 to a judge later and say i was sorry and all charges were droped)

Texmex was fired by 7-11 and got probabation for attacking me infront of two cops. ( i did have to go to court which sucked )

So after this happened I wrote a long letter to 7-11. I sent it about 50 times. Finally they wrote back with a apology and a gift certificate for $500. I just got this letter now, six years later.

Image what would have happened if I would have punched out texmex? I would have a criminal record and my life would have been much MUCH more shitty, all over some gum....

Now I may sue 7-11. Hope that entertained all peops at work, who are bored ;)
Holy Sheep
30-03-2005, 00:19
You made $480 from stealing GUM!!! You own.
31
30-03-2005, 00:20
A cowboy uniform? That is mucho bizarro.
Potaria
30-03-2005, 00:20
See why I hate Texas dorks? I'm not saying Texans in general, I'm saying the ones who are like that.

And your huge friend whipping "it" out... That was fucking gold, man!
Jamil
30-03-2005, 00:20
This is a funny story, could have ended up being very shitty though..

YEARS ago, about 6 to be exact I was out drinking. Me and some friends went across the street to a 7-11 from the club we are at to get smokes (i dont) and some munchies.

Basically, i am a little drunk but still very coherant and lucid. Had about 6 beer, so nothing major. When I get a little drunk I tend to become stupid.

Basically, I had gone up to the register to purchase a drink and in my hand I had a pack of gum. Stupid me I forgot to pay for the gum. I walk out with the "stolen" gum and my purchased drink.

A minute later some knucklehead with a texmex cowboy getup (even had spurs on :rolleyes: :rolleyes: seriously! he did!!) runs after me and my friends yelling at me " YOU ARE UNDER ARREST"

I yell back " are you stupid, for what?"

Texmex responds " YOU STOLE THAT GUM!!!"

Me "ummm ok sorry i will go pay for it now!"

Texmex " NO your under arrest, your coming with me NOW!!!"

Then the guy grabs my arm and pulls out some hangcuffs. iIbreak out of his grasp and cock my fist.

My friends start yelling out " kick his FUCKIN ASS JAY!!! AHAHAHAHAH"

Texmex responds by saying I will hunt you down if you try and get away!! in a low serious voice. TO which some of my friends find very very funny and one of my HUGE friends (who is insanly drunk and stoned) whips out his DICK and starts waving it around yelling " arrest me sheriff!!!"

Of course one of my friends laughs so hard he pees his pants and texmex looks lke he is going to snap.


Since I am not so drunk I decide fuck it and go in with the guy. I give texmex a fake name and sit in to wait. After waiting for a hour the cops come, i give the cops my real name to which texmex gets mad and grabs me.
" i put up with all that BS and you give me a fake name " he yells at me, to which i respond
" I dont give shit what some dork security guard asks of me fucknuts"
The cops then have to pull the guy off me.


Then they arrest the security guard and give me a weird citation for petty theft. ( I had to pay $20 to a judge later and say i was sorry and all charges were droped)

Texmex was fired by 7-11 and got probabation for attacking me infront of two cops. ( i did have to go to court which sucked )

So after this happened I wrote a long letter to 7-11. I sent it about 50 times. Finally they wrote back with a apology and a gift certificate for $500. I just got this letter now, six years later.

Image what would have happened if I would have punched out texmex? I would have a criminal record and my life would have been much MUCH more shitty, all over some gum....

Now I may sue 7-11. Hope that entertained all peops at work, who are bored ;)

Are you coming out of the closet? (the bolds)
Evil Arch Conservative
30-03-2005, 00:29
Oh man, the sights police must see in the course of their careers.

Enjoy your money! You earned it. Just curious, how much did the envelopes, paper, ink, and postage cost?
Jaythewise
30-03-2005, 00:37
Oh man, the sights police must see in the course of their careers.

Enjoy your money! You earned it. Just curious, how much did the envelopes, paper, ink, and postage cost?


ahh alot lol, it was more to piss off 7-11.

I live in alberta by the way and some morons from the little towns think they are cowboys...
Jaythewise
30-03-2005, 00:37
Are you coming out of the closet? (the bolds)

yes i am you caught me!
Peechland
30-03-2005, 00:53
LOL Jay! That is soooo "My Cousin Vinny-ish"
North Island
30-03-2005, 00:54
"Bite Me 7-11" Ye, bite him!
Jaythewise
30-03-2005, 00:56
LOL Jay! That is soooo "My Cousin Vinny-ish"

one of the weirdest nights of my life. Peops i dont know now me cause of this.
Evil Arch Conservative
30-03-2005, 00:57
ahh alot lol, it was more to piss off 7-11.

I live in alberta by the way and some morons from the little towns think they are cowboys...

This story just got 400% more funny.
Jamil
30-03-2005, 00:58
This story just got 400% more funny.
Damn Albertans are rich, green-eyed, pigs!
Lascivious Maximus
30-03-2005, 01:00
Damn Albertans are rich, green-eyed, pigs!
Whats wrong with green eyes?
Peechland
30-03-2005, 01:01
Whats wrong with green eyes?

not a darn thing sugar...


"7-11 sucks!"
German Nightmare
30-03-2005, 01:01
Ooh - this IS funny!
Jamil
30-03-2005, 01:05
Whats wrong with green eyes?
I have a picture of me with green eyes :D
Lascivious Maximus
30-03-2005, 01:10
I have a picture of me with green eyes :D
*gasp* You tease!!! You know they're my favourite... Thats not fair, you can't be a hot Canadian and have green eyes... it's like... you're... female kryptonite... I'm powerless now. Crap.
Jamil
30-03-2005, 01:10
*gasp* You tease!!! You know they're my favourite... Thats not fair, you can't be a hot Canadian and have green eyes... it's like... you're... female kryptonite... I'm powerless now. Crap.
Muahaha you suck. Sucker.
Lascivious Maximus
30-03-2005, 01:11
not a darn thing sugar...
Thank ya peechy! ;)
Potaria
30-03-2005, 01:11
You're in ALBERTA? You were jumped by a poser!!
Lascivious Maximus
30-03-2005, 01:12
Muahaha you suck. Sucker.
You're... evil.
Jamil
30-03-2005, 01:13
You're... evil.
So I've heard.
Jaythewise
30-03-2005, 01:43
You're in ALBERTA? You were jumped by a poser!!

No by texmex, you texmex ;)
Potaria
30-03-2005, 01:44
No by texmex, you texmex ;)

You wanker :D.