Afghregastan
24-03-2005, 00:01
...are trapped on a desert island, and down to their last food source, a can of baked beans. Lacking a can-openner a debate arises on how to best open the can without wasting the contents and insuring an equitable distribution of the beans. After some time, they agree to go off on their own for three hours and come back with possible solutions to present which would then be decided by a majority vote after the presentations.
The first one to present is the engineer, he proudly roles out a contraption made up of relatively straight sticks, vines and a hand sharpened tortoise shell that acts like a circular saw. The physicist and economist smirk.
"We provide power to the system by pulling on the vines which will mechanically couple the input power to the rotating tortoise shell, which by my calculations will saw cleanly through the top of the can with an optimal amount of spillage. We can then divide up the beans evenly from there."
The physicist is the first to speak: "While displaying a remarkable amount of resourcefulness to assemble you contraption, your initial design theory lacks mathematical rigour and elegance, which is why your spillage factor, while appearing optimal is still unnacceptable. Here is my solution."
The physicist produces a large, circular flat stone with a tiny imperfection located near the center, and a complicated diagram written on the back of a napkin he found washed up on the beach.
The engineer loses his happy grin while the economist continues to smirk.
Physicist: "Now, by my calculations if we drop the can from 10m in the air in such a way that it lands precisely on the imperfection it will not only split open but the energy induced by the fall will be disipated by distributing the beans in equal proportions around the circumference of the disc."
The engineer rolls his eyes while the economist cackles madly.
Engineer: "You're kidding right? Your calculations assume an exact measure of the elevation of the can of beans, an exact trajectory for the can and completely neglects the viscosity of the tomato sauce and pork inside the can. While it looks good on paper, it's impossible to realise in practice. In the abscense of any solution from our economist friend here, I propose that we go with my (already patented) solution."
The physicist looks crestfallen and is about to agree, when the economist manages to recover from his gales of laughter.
"Wait! I do have a solution."
Engineer, nonplused: "I don't see anything."
Economist, still laughing: "Well that's because I haven't explained it to you yet, really, you physical scientists make everything too complicated, the answer is blazingly obvious when you see it."
Physicist, curious:"Well, tell us then."
Economist, triumphant: "It's very straightforward, first assume a can-openner"
The first one to present is the engineer, he proudly roles out a contraption made up of relatively straight sticks, vines and a hand sharpened tortoise shell that acts like a circular saw. The physicist and economist smirk.
"We provide power to the system by pulling on the vines which will mechanically couple the input power to the rotating tortoise shell, which by my calculations will saw cleanly through the top of the can with an optimal amount of spillage. We can then divide up the beans evenly from there."
The physicist is the first to speak: "While displaying a remarkable amount of resourcefulness to assemble you contraption, your initial design theory lacks mathematical rigour and elegance, which is why your spillage factor, while appearing optimal is still unnacceptable. Here is my solution."
The physicist produces a large, circular flat stone with a tiny imperfection located near the center, and a complicated diagram written on the back of a napkin he found washed up on the beach.
The engineer loses his happy grin while the economist continues to smirk.
Physicist: "Now, by my calculations if we drop the can from 10m in the air in such a way that it lands precisely on the imperfection it will not only split open but the energy induced by the fall will be disipated by distributing the beans in equal proportions around the circumference of the disc."
The engineer rolls his eyes while the economist cackles madly.
Engineer: "You're kidding right? Your calculations assume an exact measure of the elevation of the can of beans, an exact trajectory for the can and completely neglects the viscosity of the tomato sauce and pork inside the can. While it looks good on paper, it's impossible to realise in practice. In the abscense of any solution from our economist friend here, I propose that we go with my (already patented) solution."
The physicist looks crestfallen and is about to agree, when the economist manages to recover from his gales of laughter.
"Wait! I do have a solution."
Engineer, nonplused: "I don't see anything."
Economist, still laughing: "Well that's because I haven't explained it to you yet, really, you physical scientists make everything too complicated, the answer is blazingly obvious when you see it."
Physicist, curious:"Well, tell us then."
Economist, triumphant: "It's very straightforward, first assume a can-openner"