NationStates Jolt Archive


Cartoon Network: A network of lies?

The Lightning Star
23-03-2005, 08:46
A few months ago, I was watching Cartoon Network(I usually only watch the Anime on late at night, but occasionally I just watch the normal programming) when I came upon a Johnny Bravo (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Johnny_Bravo) episode. "Ah well, there's nothing better on," I said to myself, so I watched. What happened was that Johnny got stranded on an Island full of beautiful women(presumably lesbians, but I'm not sure) where he is supposed to be sacrificed to a volcano to appease their god or whatnot. Right before he is thrown in, Johnny is told that the god demands the body of a virgin, or something like that. Upon hearing the word "virgin", Johnny looks aghast and he tries to tell the women something but it is too late, and he is thrown into the Volcano(of course, he somehow survives by being spit out by the volcano because he isn't a virgin. Of course, he lands on an Island of gay guys).

My question is, How in god's name is Johnny not a virgin!?!, and why weren't we told of this before! We went entire seasons thinking he was some guy who wanted a girlfriend but had never been laid in his life, but then all of a sudden, "Look, he isn't a virgin!". We could at least have a heads up!

Jeez, and I thought I could trust CN. I mean, they are the channel with Cowboy Bebop and Full Metal Alchemist! How could they lie to me?!?!?

*cries*

*eats a Twinkie*

*spits out Twinkie because he realizes he hates Twinkies*
Potaria
23-03-2005, 08:47
I saw that episode a long time ago... Way back in 1997, in fact.

I was wondering what the fuck was going on, too.
The Lightning Star
23-03-2005, 08:48
I saw that episode a long time ago... Way back in 1997, in fact.

I was wondering what the fuck was going on, too.

It doesn't matter when you see it.

It makes no sense.
Potaria
23-03-2005, 08:49
Yeah, I know. That's why I was wondering what the fuck was going on.
The Lightning Star
23-03-2005, 08:51
Yeah, I know. That's why I was wondering what the fuck was going on.

The question is, to whom did he loose his virginity?

*shudders*

I don't think I should focus too much on that..
Plutophobia
23-03-2005, 09:08
Yes, I've heard about this. Other sources have called this the "Bravogate Scandal."

This just goes to show you that Cartoon Network has a liberal bias. They have for years. Powerpuff Girls, for example: there's the feminist agenda for you. Dexter's Laboratory-THAT'S liberal academia, voicing its own distorted, anti-Christian, anti-creationist, anti-life opinion. Hi Hi PUFFY Amiyumi... They're a bunch of pagan, drug-addicted hippies. Obviously, "Puffy" is a reference to marijuana. And then there's Ed, Edd, and Eddy, their own program which exaggerates the poor living conditions and education of the lower class and minorities.

Absolutely ridiculous. They give "objective cartooning" a bad name.
Telariua
23-03-2005, 09:12
Yes, I've heard about this. Other sources have called this the "Bravogate Scandal."

This just goes to show you that Cartoon Network has a liberal bias. They have for years. Powerpuff Girls, for example: there's the feminist agenda for you. Dexter's Laboratory-THAT'S liberal academia, voicing its own distorted, anti-Christian, anti-creationist, anti-life opinion. Hi Hi PUFFY Amiyumi... They're a bunch of pagan, drug-addicted hippies. Obviously, "Puffy" is a reference to marijuana. And then there's Ed, Edd, and Eddy, their own program which exaggerates the poor living conditions and education of the lower class and minorities.

Absolutely ridiculous. They give "objective cartooning" a bad name.
holy crap! I thought I could make a conspiracy out of anything
Trammwerk
23-03-2005, 09:49
Maybe he is a virgin, but tried to tell the women he isn't so he wouldn't look like the loser that he is? A lot of guys do it in real life.
Wisjersey
23-03-2005, 09:56
Did any of you folks come up with the idea that Virgin may actually be Johnny Bravo's Zodiac Sign? I'd say that would explain it, wouldn't it? ;)

(Virgin = Virgo)
StuckInFrance
23-03-2005, 10:35
Don't kids watch that show? I wonder how many parents had a tough time trying to explain to their kids what a virgin is...
United East Asia
23-03-2005, 10:44
Absolutely ridiculous. They give "objective cartooning" a bad name.


Objective? *looks at old Bugs Bunny cartoons* yeah... right... rofl...
Kleptonis
23-03-2005, 12:34
Don't kids watch that show? I wonder how many parents had a tough time trying to explain to their kids what a virgin is...
Not really. With the amount of times they use the phrase "virgin sacrifice" in cartoons, most kids end up assuming that a virgin is a person to be sacrificed, or something like that.
Bolol
23-03-2005, 12:37
Hmm...No one's done the inevitable yet.

"Won't someone think of the children!?"

Um...no.
The Lightning Star
23-03-2005, 18:11
Hmm...No one's done the inevitable yet.

"Won't someone think of the children!?"

Um...no.

Exactly!
Kerlapa
23-03-2005, 18:26
its a cartoon, they arnt supposed to make sense. who cares!!!
DandylionEaters
23-03-2005, 18:44
Don't kids watch that show? I wonder how many parents had a tough time trying to explain to their kids what a virgin is...

Simple, "A Virgin is anyone who buys products at the Virgin megastore" :p
Zemcraft
23-03-2005, 18:48
And THOSE people deserve to be sacrificed. :p
Kappie
23-03-2005, 18:53
I do have a kid and you wouldn't believe the stuff I've had to explain because of cartoon network. Disney is worse though. All the biggest kid characters have iffy names : Buzz, Woody, Lucky. Talk about that in a restaurant. Never been so embarrassed.
Greedy Pig
23-03-2005, 18:57
My question is, How in god's name is Johnny not a virgin!?!,

His mother loves him very much.
Carbdown
23-03-2005, 19:03
Actually Johnny has in several episodes gotten girls to like him..

1: A talking elk. Ofcourse once he found out he was only being used to make her ex jealous he was even more wierded out then the fact that he was dating a talking elk..

2: A werewolf chick who on Fridays turned into a short annoying man named Melvin who collected stamps.

3: When he was the lesser of two evils against the guy who made school house rock rythems to "pretending" to be a sensitive guy. Proving though he's a male shovanistic pig, atleast he's honost about who and what he is. And girls DO prefer honosty over what they want to hear.

There's been other times to but I forget. I get called Johnny Bravo alot because I often give an eyebrow like that, scream like a little girl, my only friend IS an annoying little girl and complete dweeb, and mom is my idol/kicks my ass from time to time.

"That's another thing, you are like.. healthy and buff meanwhile everyone can beat the crap out of--"
"Shutup."
The Lightning Star
23-03-2005, 19:21
His mother loves him very much.



AHHHHHHHH!!!!!

SICKO!

*thinks of more pleasant things...*