NationStates Jolt Archive

As we all know, almost half of all marriages end in divorce. While most people see this as a problem about people not working towards a marriage or treating it like it is a sacred thing which should never be broken, I see the problem in a different light.
There are too many people marrying people they can't live with. We need to find some way to educate people as to what makes a long lasting marriage, and what to look for in a spouse as opposed to a lover. Marriage needs to be more carefully considered, and not such a spur-of-the-moment thing.

As we all know, almost half of all marriages end in divorce. While most people see this as a problem about people not working towards a marriage or treating it like it is a sacred thing which should never be broken, I see the problem in a different light.
There are too many people marrying people they can't live with. We need to find some way to educate people as to what makes a long lasting marriage, and what to look for in a spouse as opposed to a lover. Marriage needs to be more carefully considered, and not such a spur-of-the-moment thing.
*Giggles* You sweetie pie!

Curious: do you think gay marriage would lower the divorce rate?

*Giggles* You sweetie pie!

Curious: do you think gay marriage would lower the divorce rate?

probably not, considering one of the first lesbian to be married in Mass. has gotten a divorce only a few month after marriage.

As we all know, almost half of all marriages end in divorce.


Given that China has about one fifth the world population and a divorce rate of roughly one in five marriages I somehow doubt your figures.

Given that China has about one fifth the world population and a divorce rate of roughly one in five marriages I somehow doubt your figures.

I think he or she ment in America.

I think he or she ment in America.

Possibly, but for all we know they might have been refering to the divorce rate on the Pitcairn Islands or in Leichtenstein.

There was an article in the newspaper today about how hard it is for Chinese couples to get divorces, with the legal obstacles (their employer has to approve), and the social stigma.

Here we go:

China Divorce Rate Rises (http://www.casperstartribune.net/articles/2005/03/14/news/world/05dceb845b821f8487256fc3005fc186.txt)

first off, yes I did mean American divorce rates. Pardon my forgetting for the moment that I'm adressing a world community.
And since I stated in another thread that to provide numbers without a source (http://www.divorcereform.org/rates.html) is paramount to lying, it would be hypocritical of me not to include one.

As we all know, almost half of all marriages end in divorce. While most people see this as a problem about people not working towards a marriage or treating it like it is a sacred thing which should never be broken, I see the problem in a different light.
There are too many people marrying people they can't live with. We need to find some way to educate people as to what makes a long lasting marriage, and what to look for in a spouse as opposed to a lover. Marriage needs to be more carefully considered, and not such a spur-of-the-moment thing.


I agree with everything you said, Cyrian.

I have been married for mucho, mucho years, and my husband and I took our time before taking the plunge. We got to know each other - slowly - then married. I knew it was right and he knew it was right and it has worked. In my area, it is almost as if he and I are a rare breed - we're still married - and divorce is all around us - friends and family.

As we all know, almost half of all marriages end in divorce. While most people see this as a problem about people not working towards a marriage or treating it like it is a sacred thing which should never be broken, I see the problem in a different light.
There are too many people marrying people they can't live with. We need to find some way to educate people as to what makes a long lasting marriage, and what to look for in a spouse as opposed to a lover. Marriage needs to be more carefully considered, and not such a spur-of-the-moment thing.

Mandatory pre-marital counseling?

This is going to sound like a silly question, but I think it is a fundamental one on the question of marriage:

What is it?

This is going to sound like a silly question, but I think it is a fundamental one on the question of marriage:

What is it?

A human social construct involving a pair of humans in a long-term legally or religiously codified pseudosexual relationship.

Mandatory pre-marital counseling?
If we could figure out some way in which counselling worked almost all the time, and we can trust counsellors. Or maybe something like requiring a couple to live together for a few months before getting married. Actually, both of these would be a grand imposition on our civil liberties, so I wouldn't support them, but I'm just throwing ideas out.

Curious: do you think gay marriage would lower the divorce rate?
I think the divorce rate is a number, so it doesn't really matter. I support fully a gay person's right to marry, but I would guess from the numbers i've seen that the gay divorce rate is significantly lower.

A human social construct involving a pair of humans in a long-term legally or religiously codified pseudosexual relationship.

Well that sucked the fun out of it! :(

It is a sad trend. I think people need to just slow down before doing anything life-altering (like getting married or -dare I say- getting divorsed.

I know I don't plan to rush into any sort of relationship. I think that will be the best in the end. You date, you try to meet many different people. Once you've found the right person...I think you'll know it.

But maybe I'm just being a naive youngster...(sigh)

And I know how rough it is to grow up in a single parent home as a result of divorse. It's not the finances that are the problem in my case, but it's the fact that I have no real male role model in my life. And my dad's a great guy, I really wish I saw him more often.

Not that my mom hasn't done a DAMN GOOD job at raising me and my brothers! I couldn't have more respect for that woman! I think I may be proof that you CAN grow up "normally" in a single parent environment.

I'll follow my tactics for relationships, and hopefully as I get older, I can be a good husband...and if I ever decide to have kids, a good father.

Mandatory pre-marital counseling?
The word "mandatory" sets off all kinds of warning bells to me.

Not the government's business to regulate, plain and simple.

possibly make divorces a bit harder and more complicated to come into action



The more complicated it is, more people will think twice before getting one.

Curious: do you think gay marriage would lower the divorce rate?
not initially, since tons of gay people would be so excited at the new opportunity that they would rush to marry even if their relationships wasn't quite ready. they also would probably want to take the plunge quick, because they would be thinking, "this could be taken away at any minute, so if i ever want the chance to marry i should do it NOW."

but after that first rush that would include a lot of impulse-weddings, i think the divorce rates among gay couples would settle down.

As we all know, almost half of all marriages end in divorce. While most people see this as a problem about people not working towards a marriage or treating it like it is a sacred thing which should never be broken, I see the problem in a different light.
There are too many people marrying people they can't live with. We need to find some way to educate people as to what makes a long lasting marriage, and what to look for in a spouse as opposed to a lover. Marriage needs to be more carefully considered, and not such a spur-of-the-moment thing.
i don't think there is any way to force people to make better choices. it's more about a need for societal change than anything else, in my opinion; people are still pressured to marry, and pressured to marry relatively early in life, and pressured even more to have children (in wedlock), and these pressures drive many people to marry when they don't really want to. far too many people fall in love with the IDEA of being married, rather than with their own marriage, and that's another major problem.