NationStates Jolt Archive

Mine would have to be a sentence that revolves around the word "crackwhore".

I quite like the term asshat myself... although any sentence that successfully juxtaposes two insulting terms in a surreal way works for me...

Woo... little word heavy there... heh

Asshat and Dickwipe are good enough for me.

any profanity that can be fitted into the sentence as many times as possible. Fuck is always a good one: Fuck the fucking fuckwit

Something i dont use much but nevertheless like best of all is "bastard of shit" which I have heard said by middle easterners.

Complex: An insult that is both witty, and proves that they are an idiot at the same time. (If I wanted the opinion of a *blank* on *blank*, I'd travel to *blank*)

Simple: Any sentence where you can perfectly time and emphasize "bitch". (Semper Fi, bitch...)

Fjorking Hilarious: When a person manages to string out a sentence comprised entirely of obsenity.

http://www.pangloss.com/seidel/Shaker/
Now there are some high-quality insults!
For example:
"[Thou] shall stand in fire up to the navel and in ice up to th'heart, and there th'offending part burns and the deceiving part freezes."
"Thou vain whoreson joithead!"
"Thou yeasty tickle-brained malcontent!"
"So, so, thou common dog, didst thou disgorge thy glutton bosom."
"A weasel hath not such a deal of spleen as you are toss'd with."

"Conservative".

Simple: Any sentence where you can perfectly time and emphasize "bitch". (Semper Fi, bitch...)

I'm rick james bitch! :p Bitch is a good one.

*Sigh* If (he/she/you) only had a brain...

you slimy little communist shit twinkle toed cocksucker!

thats gotta be my favorite

you slimy little communist shit twinkle toed cocksucker!

thats gotta be my favorite


yes~!

I like taffer, from Thief. But then I'm just a hopeless thief fan.

I like a random insulting word combined with one that isn't insulting...
Shit-toaster.
Sod-bus.
Twat-magnet.

They're funny.

Even Jesus hates your guts! :D

yes~!
I love that movie. I have seen it everyear just about since I was 6

http://www.pangloss.com/seidel/Shaker/
Now there are some high-quality insults!
For example:
"[Thou] shall stand in fire up to the navel and in ice up to th'heart, and there th'offending part burns and the deceiving part freezes."
"Thou vain whoreson joithead!"
"Thou yeasty tickle-brained malcontent!"
"So, so, thou common dog, didst thou disgorge thy glutton bosom."
"A weasel hath not such a deal of spleen as you are toss'd with."

Hot damn! I love Shakespearean insults!

(sigh) They don't make them like they used to do they?

"Fucktard" used to be a favorite, but now it's really just whatever manages to play off of the current moment. But yeah, bitch is almost always funny, too.

'fuck you, you fucking fuck' works for me

Any insults with the words pussy, damn, or fuck are good insults.

ex. "Go fuck your damn pussy!" is a good insult to tell a gay.

I once got called a "Nazi anarchist punk".
I was rather amused at that one...

"fuckwit"

"Deuchemuffin or any other word that has "Deuche" as a prefix.

Any insults with the words pussy, damn, or fuck are good insults.

ex. "Go fuck your damn pussy!" is a good insult to tell a gay.

As "a gay", I can tell you that that is not a good insult. Gay people have very high standards when it comes to verbal jousting, and that just doesn't even blip on the radar.

The word... contarted.

My current favourite is from the otherwise lacklustre Blade 3: "Cock-juggling thunder-****".

My current favourite is from the otherwise lacklustre Blade 3: "Cock-juggling thunder-****".


That one almost attempts to make sense!

Spaztard is a favorite of mine, but if I want to confuse them, I use the NS based fluffle-slut. :fluffle: :D

I bet if you called somebody a fluffle-slut, they'd be very confused.

I like this:
"Shut up, asswipe"

They really do. It works especially well after a long exchange of short insults:

Them: Idiot!
Me: Moron!
Them: Bitch!
Me: Whore!
Them: ****!
Me: Fluffle-slut!
Them: :confused:
Me: :D *skips off*

They really do. It works especially well after a long exchange of short insults:

Them: Idiot!
Me: Moron!
Them: Bitch!
Me: Whore!
Them: ****!
Me: Fluffle-slut!
Them: :confused:
Me: :D *skips off*


I'll have to try that.

How about this?

"Arrrrr, I am an asspirate"

How about this?

"Arrrrr, I am an asspirate"


I think that would probably gross a few people out...

My personal favorite has to be:

"Something that enver ceases to amaze me is that out of a hundred million sperm cells, you're the one that made it."

And if I'm feeling particularly vitriolic, I can always add "bitch" to the end. Bitch is a good, all-terrain insult.

How about this?

"Arrrrr, I am an asspirate"
"Asspirate" makes me think "gay rapist", for some reason.

"Asspirate" makes me think "gay rapist", for some reason.

Probably the association with plundering booty.

Probably the association with plundering booty.


DUDE! NO!

In my mind, this isn't even a nasty insult but I find when I direct it to men - they pitch big ol' hissyfits - "You big sissy." Or even if I call them - "sissy boy," they get PO'd. :rolleyes:

DUDE! NO!
This is quite possibly one of my favorite responses to elicit. :D

In my mind, this isn't even a nasty insult but I find when I direct it to men - they pitch big ol' hissyfits - "You big sissy." Or even if I call them - "sissy boy," they get PO'd. :rolleyes:


Hah, I called this one kid in Kindergarten a sissy, and he ran after me on the playground. He was a bit bigger than me, but he didn't have as much stamina. We ran so long that he got tired, and by the time he stopped to catch his breath, we had to go back to class.

Yeah, a lot of guys don't like being called "sissies".

I'm partial to "Yo Mama" Jokes.

I'm partial to "Yo Mama" Jokes.
Like "napolean Dynamite"?

Like "napolean Dynamite"?

Your mom goes to college!

P.U.B. -Pretentious Ugly Bint
C.O.W. - Cantankerous Old Windbag

How is your wife and my kids? ;)

Does it still burn when you pee? :headbang:

Like "napolean Dynamite"?


I havent seen it yet :)

I'm old school Yo mama.....

"Yo mama's so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes"

Idol of idiot-worshippers!

I'm partial to "Yo Mama" Jokes.
*Agrees* Those are fun, not my fave, tho.

I'm not even sure what my fave is. Anything that takes what somebody just said and throws it back in their face is a fave. :D

I prefer the word 'liberal', I noticed it pisses lefties off, they prefer to be called 'progressive' these days. Even though leftism does not equal progressivism.

If thou dost marry, I'll give thee this plague for thy dowry.

I love this counter:

Mr. A: "Your mom was great last night, and she did it for free too."
Mr. B: "Yeah? Well the joke's on you: I have two dads."

random declaration, not so much an insult but.........

I am Rick James Bitch

Poopy face.

Poopy face.
All together now: awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!

Seriously, that's one of the cu-utest insults on the face of the planet.

I love this counter:

Mr. A: "Your mom was great last night, and she did it for free too."
Mr. B: "Yeah? Well the joke's on you: I have two dads."
or I prefer this one.

Mr. B: "Yeah? Well the jokes on you: my moms dead."

I would post more but I'd then become a homophobic racist misygonist poopy face from Nine o'clock when the dudes fuck up on their homework even though they were watching "Reefer Madness" during the part when Jesus was like "Shit nigga, better recognize" and they was all like "STFU fag you aren't my Messiah." Then Jesus hit them with a bamboo cane and told them to LMFAO.

At the moment, "You're the worst dissapointment since the crucifixion!"

Thou roguish fat-kidneyed scut!

Thou roguish fat-kidneyed scut!


...Okay.

"Shut your festering gob, you tit! Your type really makes me puke, you vacuous, toffee-nosed, MALODOROUS PERVERT!!!"

Go, prick thy face, and over-red thy fear, thou lily-liver'd boy.

Go, prick thy face, and over-red thy fear, thou lily-liver'd boy.


That just doesn't have the impact of the Monty Python's "abuse".

My fave's got to be:

"I don't give two fucking shits, you fucktart bastage!"

Probably one of the most random insults of mine, but it still works :D

"Shut Your Fucking Face, Uncle Fucker!"

That's a classic.

Silly

A face only your mother could love, and from what I've heard she does regularly.

A face only your mother could love, and from what I've heard she does regularly.


Hmm...

Crackerjack.

You smell of cabbage and your mother's a hamster.

People know to be offended, but what are they offended at?

"You don't frighten me, pig-dog! Go and boil your bottom, son of a silly person. I blow my nose at you so cold! I don't wanna talk to you no more, you empty-headed animal food trough wiper! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelt of Elderberries! Now, go away or I shall taunt you a second time!

"You don't frighten me, pig-dog! Go and boil your bottom, son of a silly person. I blow my nose at you so cold! I don't wanna talk to you no more, you empty-headed animal food trough wiper! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelt of Elderberries! Now, go away or I shall taunt you a second time!

Hehe, ahh the Pythons, such silly, silly humour.
Anyway, I've always found that calling someone a "Donkey Faced Cavernous Asscrack" is good, or, failing that, simply "Mocassin."

Why not "Shit-faced, candy-assed, carniverous asscrack"?

Needle-dick, the bug-fuckers a good one.

I prefer to insult someone, by calling them an idiot in such a way, that any response from them proves it.

I prefer to insult someone, by calling them an idiot in such a way, that any response from them proves it.


That usually works.

dickmuffin :D

shitehawk. not exactly sure what it means but it is fantastic.

arse. you arse. that's lovely too.

twat. you little twat.

those are the favourites right now.

i have always been keen on fuckwit as an insult
along with asscream and chav

Mine would be a toss up between "Mammal" and "Human".

Fucko
Moron
Stinkpig

Here is a resource:

George Carlin once came up with the 'Seven Words You Can't Say on Television'. In another performance, he expanded them. Well, he never stopped. He collects dirty words. Here is the page with his current collection of 2,443 dirty words. Broken down into categories for ease of browsing. :D

http://www.georgecarlin.com/home/home.html

Edit: Oops. His site is a funky one. Click on the 'Documents' header then on the 2,442 dirty words listing on the left hand side.

Tit-rash.

Just so random.

Once I was teasing this guy from peurto rico who bareley knew any english, hew finally blew his lid and screamed "Go sit in your hellchair!!!!!". I cracked up so much and he was even more frustrated.

Ass lamprey
fuckfaced fucker
fucktarded

Fucktard

and

Your dad must have been so damn ugly and your mom..well DAMN.