NationStates Jolt Archive

Why is it that so many people are wanting to rush right into a serious relationship?

Maybe it's just the perspective of someone who is in (maybe... due to fights and the like, I'm not sure what's going on anymore) a year and a half long relationship that turned serious about a year ago, but I know that if this ends, I'm probably not going to be having a serious relationship for some time. I'll date and go out and have fun... the firsts in a relationship can be great, I think, the first touch, kiss et c. I find it more exciting to move along slowly than just hop right on in, savouring the young relationship.

So, single people out there, don't go off rushing into serious relationships, just take your time, date lots of people and get to know them... if you just hop on board with the first person you meet, then you'll never know if that's who you would really want to be with or if there's someone who is better suited to you.

Just relax, it will happen when it happens. If you force things, then they just fuck up in the end.

Do you know what the most basic human instinct is? it is to pass on ones genetic information. Now days, a serious relationship is seen as socially and morally right in order to do this, therefore we adhere to the pressures of society and our own genes! That is my answer

hmmmm..... i just wish a few of my friends agreed with that theory instead of permanantly telling me to get into a serious relationship! whatever happend to just having fun!??

Do you know what the most basic human instinct is? it is to pass on ones genetic information. Now days, a serious relationship is seen as socially and morally right in order to do this, therefore we adhere to the pressures of society and our own genes! That is my answer
Well, the threads I'm referrign to were made by a 15 and 19 year old...

You don't need to be passing on your genes then. You need to be exploring.

Well, the threads I'm referrign to were made by a 15 and 19 year old...

You don't need to be passing on your genes then. You need to be exploring.

I am a 16 year old guy. I don;t want a serious relationship, but you asked for a reason, and I gave you one

Originally posted by Dakini
Well, the threads I'm referrign to were made by a 15 and 19 year old...

You don't need to be passing on your genes then. You need to be exploring.

Honestly, I think it's a lack of a paternal rolemodel.

I think it may be the desire to grow up.

What do grown ups do? They get married and have kids for one thing... for another they get jobs and the like...

Perhaps my theory goes to shit with the job stuff, I don't know too many kids who want to start their careers at 15.

Perhaps my theory goes to shit with the job stuff, I don't know too many kids who want to start their careers at 15.

Heh, I still don't know what I want to do for a job, I'm 20.

I look forward to a serious relationship.. Maybe it's because i'm very very traditional. But heck, most asians are more traditional (Hence the notion that you should get an Asian wife because their more faithful). And I'm in Malaysia. :D

But it's still generalisation to some extent. It's just that we're being brought up from a traditional background. Most that do eventually go overseas soon get corrup...(cough) influenced I mean. :D And have other open idea's about what a relationship should be like.

But to most, I usually tell them (and myself) to go out date, have fun, your young etc etc. And get the experience about different people's characteristics and personality, so that when you do have a serious relationship, you'll have it with someone you can truly love and stay together.

Heh, I still don't know what I want to do for a job, I'm 20.
Yeah, I'm 21 and still have no clue.

I'm going to career planning group sessions next week and the week after though, so I should have some idea soon enough.

Why is it that so many people are wanting to rush right into a serious relationship?


I've always taken it as a danger signal if the woman wants to rush right into (a) sleeping with me, and/or (b) being in a serious relationship.

It makes me want to run away.

I think it may be the desire to grow up.
I totally agree with you on that idea although not on the job part! For some people thought i think that getting into a serious relationship is a way of finding affection that they don't get from their parents and in the case of one of my friends a way of getting attention from the members of our friendship group :(

The reason is that many young people are (from every generation) emotionally immature. They have not developed a strong enough image of 'self' so they look outside themselves to prop it up. Some look to drugs or gangs, but many look to a romantic interest. That is why they fall so hard when they are dumped - they have a near dependence on the other person. Resulting an a quick turn-around to a new partner. Better to be with someone they don't like than to be alone (with someone they don't like).

I suspect also that with modern divorce rates being so high many look for a romantic relationship to replace a deficient one with a missing parent not to mention the remaining parent who may be disengaged or overwhelmed.

Because I've been single for seven months and I'm sick of it?

The reason is that many young people are (from every generation) emotionally immature. They have not developed a strong enough image of 'self' so they look outside themselves to prop it up. Some look to drugs or gangs, but many look to a romantic interest. That is why they fall so hard when they are dumped - they have a near dependence on the other person. Resulting an a quick turn-around to a new partner. Better to be with someone they don't like than to be alone (with someone they don't like).

I suspect also that with modern divorce rates being so high many look for a romantic relationship to replace a deficient one with a missing parent not to mention the remaining parent who may be disengaged or overwhelmed.

My problem isnt (lord knows) low self image.

Rather, I am a hopeless romantic who falls hard and fast.

The reason is that many young people are (from every generation) emotionally immature. They have not developed a strong enough image of 'self' so they look outside themselves to prop it up. Some look to drugs or gangs, but many look to a romantic interest. That is why they fall so hard when they are dumped - they have a near dependence on the other person. Resulting an a quick turn-around to a new partner. Better to be with someone they don't like than to be alone (with someone they don't like).

I suspect also that with modern divorce rates being so high many look for a romantic relationship to replace a deficient one with a missing parent not to mention the remaining parent who may be disengaged or overwhelmed.

Don't be so certain. I don't have a low self image or experimented with drugs or been involved in gangs. I hate the stereotype that teenagers are immature punks.

You do have a good theory on divorse rates though. It is hard not having a father around very often.

As for relationships. I have yet to find a person I'd want to date, but I'm hoping that it will be positive.

One more thing...Is it wierd that I'm not looking for a relationship that is sexual? That I'm just looking for a person whom I can enjoy being with? If it turns sexual, so be it, but I would not look for a partner that is only interested in sex.