NationStates Jolt Archive

Because too much of it leaves it bruised and sore


OUCHHHHHHHH

One shall not have lust outside of marriage.

There's no such thing as too much masturbation! :p

There's no such thing as too much masturbation! :p
Maybe just not for girls :p

Well, maybe if guys were more pleasing. :rolleyes:

Well, maybe if guys were more pleasing. :rolleyes:
:eek: What more can we do?

Turn gay, maybe?

Turn gay, maybe?
How does that help women? :confused:

Well, maybe if guys were more pleasing. :rolleyes:

Some of us are. :p

Some of us are. :p
Know anyone? :p

Because too much of it leaves it bruised and sore


OUCHHHHHHHH
I have a feeling there is a back story to this.

Not that I want to know it..

Because too much of it leaves it bruised and sore



Dude ... you're not supposed to *punch* it!

I wouldn't be able to tell you. Every guy's skills differs from the next.

Know anyone? :p

One or two. ;)

i've said it before and i'll say it again: never masturbate when listening to the thrash-metal band Slayer. it leaves friction burns :eek:

i've said it before and i'll say it again: never masturbate when listening to the thrash-metal band Slayer. it leaves friction burns :eek:

Lotion, people ... LOTION!

All I have to say to the men on this thread who want an answer from me is, there's more than one person involved. Remember that. ;)

All I have to say to the men on this thread who want an answer from me is, there's more than one person involved. Remember that. ;)

In masturbation? I usually fly solo.

That would be the whole point me thinks

Dude ... you're not supposed to *punch* it!

Brings a new meaning to beating the bishop.

i've said it before and i'll say it again: never masturbate when listening to the thrash-metal band Slayer. it leaves friction burns :eek:
jacking off to Slayer?
Wow. That is eeevil.
About the only thing you could do that is more evil is be aroused by Cannibal Corpse.
:D

No in sex. :rolleyes:

No in sex. :rolleyes:

Well the thread's about masturbation ... you confused me.

As for in sex ... duh. Any man who doesn't realize that is either retarded or under 30.

Well, that doesn't help me any. 30 year-olds are a little too old for me.

Well the thread's about masturbation ... you confused me.

As for in sex ... duh. Any man who doesn't realize that is either retarded or under 30.
Bad experiences? ;) :p

Bad experiences? ;) :p

You have no idea .... :eek:

LP was the one who mentioned that masturbation is only preferable to woman. I explained why.

jacking off to Slayer?
Wow. That is eeevil.
About the only thing you could do that is more evil is be aroused by Cannibal Corpse.
:D
oooh don't get me started on Cannibal Corpse :p

Well, that doesn't help me any. 30 year-olds are a little too old for me.
Personally, when I have sex, it's going to be all about pleasing the other person as I don't see any point to using someone else to masterbate with, and I'm 22...

Wow, that defines tmi. :D

Originally posted by Omnibenevolent Discord
Personally, when I have sex, it's going to be all about pleasing the other person as I don't see any point to using someone else to masterbate with, and I'm 22...

I would like to think so, too...

I'll have to think about LP's question and get back to him on that. For now I'm tired and going back to bed.

Personally, when I have sex, it's going to be all about pleasing the other person as I don't see any point to using someone else to masterbate with, and I'm 22...
I guess im just selfish :D
j/k

I'll have to think about LP's question and get back to him on that. For now I'm tired and going back to bed.
:D Sweet "dreams" ;) :fluffle:

i've said it before and i'll say it again: never masturbate when listening to the thrash-metal band Slayer. it leaves friction burns :eek:

And any guys beating off to "Killing Fields" by mentioned thrash-metal band shouldn't complain to me about lost potency, sudden shrinking, blackening, asphyxiation or genitalia falling off.

Is this the true confessions thread? :eek:

Is this the true confessions thread? :eek:

I think i will file this in a file marked "TMI" (too much info)

"Every sperm is sacred, Every sperm is great. If a sperm is wasted, God gets quite irate."



I'm surprised I'm the first to bring that up.

Why Christians say Masturbation is wrong?

Uh.. because it feels too good?

"Figured out why christians say masturbation is wrong"
They do??? :eek:

Catholics do, as well as several other sects.

Masturbation is nessesary in both sexes to relieve sexual tension. Trust me it helps.

Anyway, if you didn't, you'd have wet dreams... ewww.

Masturbation is nessesary in both sexes to relieve sexual tension. Trust me it helps.

Anyway, if you didn't, you'd have wet dreams... ewww.
Nothing beats a sticky bed in the morning

Nothing beats a sticky bed in the morning
MMM... creamy... Hey it looks tasty!

*Lick*

I think i'm gonna hurl...

Catholics do, as well as several other sects.
Ah Ha! That explains their opposition to oral sex! :eek:

MMM... creamy... Hey it looks tasty!

*Lick*

That whipped cream has gone bad

Masturbation is nessesary in both sexes to relieve sexual tension. Trust me it helps.

Anyway, if you didn't, you'd have wet dreams... ewww.
I'm glad I'm a girl! :D

I'm glad I'm a girl! :D

Meh. You bleed for 5 days every month... :D

Masturbation is nessesary in both sexes to relieve sexual tension. Trust me it helps.
I call BS

Meh. You bleed for 5 days every month... :DPoint taken. :p

I masturbate with sandpaper. I win.

Point taken. :p

Yup. We both leak fluids. In young years it's blood or sperm, as you get older it's urine... you can't win.

I masturbate with sandpaper. I win.
60 grit or 2200 grit?

I masturbate with sandpaper. I win.
A masochist, I see.

I've heard of people masturbating with cheese graters. Once you can do that, you win.
:p

A masochist, I see.

I've heard of people masturbating with cheese graters. Once you can do that, you win.
:p
I dont think anybody wins in that situation. Cept maybe the cheese grater.

I masturbate with sandpaper. I win.


hmm sounds exciting!!


yay!


love,
Tess

I could use a lube like vaseline or something, but it's such a pain in the butt to clean up afterwards, speaking of pain in the butt, the man's g-spot is so hard to find.

I would prefer to have a chick to it for me, but I find chicks my age have no idea how to masturbate a guy, it's like they are trying to start a lawn mower or something. Come on now, I'm 19 and I know to masturbate a chick, the chicks should know how to masturbate me.

Christians don't say masturbation is wrong, just lust. So you can jerk it while thinking about rainbows or algebra or Margaret Thatcher and it's okay...


Right? :confused:

Christians don't say masturbation is wrong, just lust. So you can jerk it while thinking about rainbows or algebra or Margaret Thatcher and it's okay...


Right? :confused:
actually according to christian doctrine masturbation is a worse sin than having sex with a prostitute.

Under URC 'doctrine' (insofar as we have any, I love my church) we can maturbate as much as we like as long as we aren't lustful about it. Of course if you have a teady bf/gf or are married then anything with them is OK (although I think sodomy i still off limits, not that it appeals to me anyway).

According to a couple of girls they do actually have wet dreams.

actually according to christian doctrine masturbation is a worse sin than having sex with a prostitute.

Actually, according to the Christian Scriptures, masturbation isn't worth mentioning. The Bible is entirely silent on the issue. So we're left to guess.

My advice? Guys, just make sure you take your time with it. Don't rush for the payoff. Otherwise you train yourself to be way faster than the women need. Train yourself to go as long as you can --- over an hour is a good goal.

Because too much of it leaves it bruised and sore


OUCHHHHHHHH
The term 'beating off' isn't meant to be literal!!! I suggest you try other methods! :eek: