NationStates Jolt Archive

I'm sorry to bug you all with this, and a future apology for any rascist terminology - although I myself am 1/4 Jew - perhaps you could cut me some slack...but I'm very frustrated at this moment.

My dad has been wanting to get rid of the child support because there's only three months to go and he says that the four hundred dollars are cutting into his 6,000 or so dollar monthly paycheck. He further said, "why does your mom need the money, she almost makes as much as I!" (note: he makes 70,000..she makes around 45,000..yea bullshit, I know)...well they went to court today and the tables turn and now my mom has to pay back the four hundred bucks of last month's child support, and pay three hundred dollars a month until June 9th 2005.... yea well I called him up and I said,"Um dad, I thought you said she didn't need the money because she made almost as much as you do... shut up, let me talk...yea well now you get three hundred bucks... yea dad, I ain't Jewish, I consider myself Catholic as you well know, in fact I'm chaning my name as you know to my mother's last name, Catalan..but the main fact is that I want you to know that you're a jackass, and hypocrit...and moreover, you underscore the world 'Jew'....bye dad..oh yea, tomorrow I'm going with my mom, and friday I'm not appearing at home..you can stick the three bucks up your ass."


Well, I thought this would let some steam loose..it really hasn't...I don't expect anybody to sympathize..but yea...thank you all for reading/listening.

I'm sorry to bug you all with this, and a future apology for any rascist terminology - although I myself am 1/4 Jew - perhaps you could cut me some slack...but I'm very frustrated at this moment.

My dad has been wanting to get rid of the child support because there's only three months to go and he says that the four hundred dollars are cutting into his 6,000 or so dollar monthly paycheck. He further said, "why does your mom need the money, she almost makes as much as I!" (note: he makes 70,000..she makes around 45,000..yea bullshit, I know)...well they went to court today and the tables turn and now my mom has to pay back the four hundred bucks of last month's child support, and pay three hundred dollars a month until June 9th 2005.... yea well I called him up and I said,"Um dad, I thought you said she didn't need the money because she made almost as much as you do... shut up, let me talk...yea well now you get three hundred bucks... yea dad, I ain't Jewish, I consider myself Catholic as you well know, in fact I'm chaning my name as you know to my mother's last name, Catalan..but the main fact is that I want you to know that you're a jackass, and hypocrit...and moreover, you underscore the world 'Jew'....bye dad..oh yea, tomorrow I'm going with my mom, and friday I'm not appearing at home..you can stick the three bucks up your ass."


Well, I thought this would let some steam loose..it really hasn't...I don't expect anybody to sympathize..but yea...thank you all for reading/listening.

You were right. I'd do the same thing.

Thanks - I know he's most likely extremely angered at me..but really, I can care less right now... he's being a jackass.

My question is, what state/country are you from? Paying only $400 out of a $6000 paycheck is pretty low actually. It's an automatic 25% where I'm from, plus 5% for every additional child. He was getting off easy, and with only three months to go, he sure sounds like a real jackass.

Sounds to me like there's alot of missing information. Why would a judge order your mother to refund child support?

Possibly the father was able to prove that he over paid, or that due to perhaps a year end bonus the mother went over a certain dollar amount. There are several possibilities.

Macabees - I'm sorry to hear that your father is being such a miserly jerk.

Sounds to me like there's alot of missing information. Why would a judge order your mother to refund child support?

Of what I understand is that my dad told the judge that I was with him for most of the week, which is fairly untrue, since I spend three days a week with my mom, technically four, although I love to see my cousins so I go over to their houses on Friday, although that's for about three to four hours on Friday.... it also turns out that the judge was horrible and that the judge was also Jewish, so possibly sympathy between two Jews (no offense intended...just saying that since both are Jewish there's obviously a 'brotherhood'..even though the judge was a female..hehe grrr... a brother-sister hood).

My question is, what state/country are you from? Paying only $400 out of a $6000 paycheck is pretty low actually. It's an automatic 25% where I'm from, plus 5% for every additional child. He was getting off easy, and with only three months to go, he sure sounds like a real jackass.

Yep, and he refuses to admit it...which makes him even more of a jerk.

Ah yes, I live in San Diego, California.

He sounds like a jerk, and I don't blame you for speaking you mind, but why is all this Jew rhetoric nessesary? What does that have to do with anything?

I'm sorry to bug you all with this, and a future apology for any rascist terminology - although I myself am 1/4 Jew - perhaps you could cut me some slack...but I'm very frustrated at this moment.

Well, I thought this would let some steam loose..it really hasn't...I don't expect anybody to sympathize..but yea...thank you all for reading/listening.
I realize you weren't looking for advice, but ....

My mother left my father and me right after I was born. Dad was fond of saying that "she had a baby and left." My father's parents raised me until I was 12, at which time dad remarried. He tended to favor my step-brother, perhaps because ( as my step-brother told me ) everytime he saw me, he saw my mother, who I resemble, and he and I had lots of problems. Dad died in Beaumont, Texas while I was working in Utica, New York.

I never got to say goodbye or tell him that I loved him and was sorry for all the things I said that must have hurt him deeply.

Do not completely sever ties with your father. He may have had his reasons for doing what he did, or he may simply be a dick right now. But either way, the man is still your father and if you don't at least make the effort to keep in touch and give him the chance to make amends, you will regret it to your dying day.

Just some unsolicited advice from an old man who has a few regrets.

I'm sorry to bug you all with this, and a future apology for any rascist terminology - although I myself am 1/4 Jew - perhaps you could cut me some slack...but I'm very frustrated at this moment.

My dad has been wanting to get rid of the child support because there's only three months to go and he says that the four hundred dollars are cutting into his 6,000 or so dollar monthly paycheck. He further said, "why does your mom need the money, she almost makes as much as I!" (note: he makes 70,000..she makes around 45,000..yea bullshit, I know)...well they went to court today and the tables turn and now my mom has to pay back the four hundred bucks of last month's child support, and pay three hundred dollars a month until June 9th 2005.... yea well I called him up and I said,"Um dad, I thought you said she didn't need the money because she made almost as much as you do... shut up, let me talk...yea well now you get three hundred bucks... yea dad, I ain't Jewish, I consider myself Catholic as you well know, in fact I'm chaning my name as you know to my mother's last name, Catalan..but the main fact is that I want you to know that you're a jackass, and hypocrit...and moreover, you underscore the world 'Jew'....bye dad..oh yea, tomorrow I'm going with my mom, and friday I'm not appearing at home..you can stick the three bucks up your ass."


Well, I thought this would let some steam loose..it really hasn't...I don't expect anybody to sympathize..but yea...thank you all for reading/listening.
your situation and your dad's actions suck, but your response is cool :cool: :D

Of what I understand is that my dad told the judge that I was with him for most of the week, which is fairly untrue, since I spend three days a week with my mom, technically four, although I love to see my cousins so I go over to their houses on Friday, although that's for about three to four hours on Friday.... it also turns out that the judge was horrible and that the judge was also Jewish, so possibly sympathy between two Jews (no offense intended...just saying that since both are Jewish there's obviously a 'brotherhood'..even though the judge was a female..hehe grrr... a brother-sister hood).

Sounds to me like you split time between your Mother and your Father fairly evenly, so why is it you think he should pay support?

My Brother was given custody of his Son and split it with his ex-wife and neither of them paid any support. Why would you expect your Father to pay your Mother if this was the case?

Regards,
Gaar

I realize you weren't looking for advice, but ....

My mother left my father and me right after I was born. Dad was fond of saying that "she had a baby and left." My father's parents raised me until I was 12, at which time dad remarried. He tended to favor my step-brother, perhaps because ( as my step-brother told me ) everytime he saw me, he saw my mother, who I resemble, and he and I had lots of problems. Dad died in Beaumont, Texas while I was working in Utica, New York.

I never got to say goodbye or tell him that I loved him and was sorry for all the things I said that must have hurt him deeply.

Do not completely sever ties with your father. He may have had his reasons for doing what he did, or he may simply be a dick right now. But either way, the man is still your father and if you don't at least make the effort to keep in touch and give him the chance to make amends, you will regret it to your dying day.

Just some unsolicited advice from an old man who has a few regrets.

Well, you deserve more sympathy than I do, and I offer you this, and I acknowledge that you are correct. I plan to move to Spain this summer with my mother, but I'm sure that I will keep up normal relations with my father, through e-mail and through visits.

Thank you very much for your words.

Sounds to me like you split time between your Mother and your Father fairly evenly, so why is it you think he should pay support?

My Brother was given custody of his Son and split it with his ex-wife and neither of them payed any support. Why would you expect your Father to pay your Mother if this was the case?

Regards,
Gaar


I don't expect him to pay support to my mother. I have full confidence that my mother can support herself and myself. What I do care about is that he claims that my mom doesn't need the money, and then he turns around and asks for three hundred bucks and get's them....that's hypocrisy..and that's using me, who he told me that my actions of going with him to my cousin's house on Fridays, had nothing to do with child support...he lied to me because he told the judge that I'm with him fully on Fridays.

What you say is correct, however, and that's what I stressed to my mom. In truth, neither of them seem very cooperative. But I consider what my dad did as not an act of a gentleman.

He sounds like a jerk, and I don't blame you for speaking you mind, but why is all this Jew rhetoric nessesary? What does that have to do with anything?

Meh, you're right..but he's Jewish..and I just blurted it out.

I don't expect him to pay support to my mother. I have full confidence that my mother can support herself and myself. What I do care about is that he claims that my mom doesn't need the money, and then he turns around and asks for three hundred bucks and get's them....that's hypocrisy..and that's using me, who he told me that my actions of going with him to my cousin's house on Fridays, had nothing to do with child support...he lied to me because he told the judge that I'm with him fully on Fridays.

What you say is correct, however, and that's what I stressed to my mom. In truth, neither of them seem very cooperative. But I consider what my dad did as not an act of a gentleman.

If you are going to live exclusively with your Mother, I would say he should pay support. You are half his responsibility, until you reach adulthood, after all.

Perhaps the money he is receiving is a "pay back" for what he paid while the custody was split. All I know is, unless you are aware of the full circumstances behind any decision, I wouldn't pass judgement on either of them.

I too was a child that grew up in a split Home. It took me many years after I became an adult to find out that the many things I had been told about my Father had "another side" to them. I can now look back and see how each of them (my Parents) had their own self-interest in what was happening and neither was to "blame" for it.

But I am a lucky one...

I get to spend quite a bit of time with my Father now, he is having some Major problems with his Heart and I try to see him several times a week, as well as on the weekends, to make up for "lost" time.

Spending the day Fishing with your Father can truly be a very fulfilling day, and you would be surprised at the things they can continue to teach you, as well as the things you may be able to teach them...

All it takes is an open mind and an open Heart.

Regards,
Gaar

I'm sorry to bug you all with this...
No need to apologize at all.

My dad has been wanting to get rid of the child support because there's only three months to go and he says that the four hundred dollars are cutting into his 6,000 or so dollar monthly paycheck. He further said, "why does your mom need the money, she almost makes as much as I!" (note: he makes 70,000..she makes around 45,000..yea bullshit, I know)...well they went to court today and the tables turn and now my mom has to pay back the four hundred bucks of last month's child support, and pay three hundred dollars a month until June 9th 2005.... yea well I called him up and I said,"Um dad, I thought you said she didn't need the money because she made almost as much as you do... shut up, let me talk...yea well now you get three hundred bucks... yea dad, I ain't Jewish, I consider myself Catholic as you well know, in fact I'm chaning my name as you know to my mother's last name, Catalan..but the main fact is that I want you to know that you're a jackass, and hypocrit...and moreover, you underscore the world 'Jew'....bye dad..oh yea, tomorrow I'm going with my mom, and friday I'm not appearing at home..you can stick the three bucks up your ass."


Well, I thought this would let some steam loose..it really hasn't...I don't expect anybody to sympathize..but yea...thank you all for reading/listening.
I'm really sorry that this is all happening to you. I've never gone through anything like that...but I am going through something with my dad. Just so happens I started a thread on it here as well. We need to talk more...

I read your thread but decided not to say much because right now I can't speak a lot for relations between father and son.

I'm of a mixed opinion on this one. While you have every right to be upset with your dad and to let him know, it bothers me when kids get caught in the middle of problems between estranged parents. Your relationship with your dad should be based on how he treats you, and not on how he treats your mom, but I guess, in his eagerness to save a few bucks, he appears to show how little he cares about you or your feelings.

OTOH, kids deserve to know the truth. It's too easy for one parent to say bad things about the other and cause the kids to think badly of the other parent. If you are nearing adulthood, you certainly can understand the details, but I would suggest making sure you have all the details before you blame one parent or another. You may be completely right that your dad is a jackass, but it might not hurt to listen to his side and maybe ask for proof, like cancelled checks, paystubs, etc. I'm just saying.

Unfortunately, fair isn't a term used in the legal system. Whomever has the better attorney, and usually, more money, has a distinct advantage. As for the judge being partial because of ethnicity or religion, I would tend to doubt that. I'm not saying it doesn't happen, but I would look for more feasible explanations first, rather than questioning the ethics of the judge.

Well, I mean, I've looked at paystubs, indeed I've been collecting my dad's credit card stubs as well as pay check stubs and I've done the same with my mother and my father makes just around 73,000 dollars a year, while my mother makes around 48,000. So, the grounds that my father must receive child support, when as others said, the time is split fifty-fifty (more or less) and my mother has an income which is almost half as much as his you wish to know what was going through the judge's head.

On the other hand, neither of my parents have had judges, and went to court representing themselves. I've had extensive talks with my father so far and the only arguments he's been able to conjur so far are,"I haven't taken anything from your mother. She owns me that money." He's also been able to repeat over and over again,"It's not my fault your mother punishes you for the judge's decision."

The latter is reference to the cancellations of plans to go to Spain frankly because my mother has to pay for a 700 dollar a month apartment in San Bernardino (California), as well as a new car, as well as a home, and payments for several abodes in Spain, and on top of that three hundred dollars a month, which although her paycheck does seem fit enough to pay for all that it's 48,000 dollars without taxcuts and spread over a twelve month period, meaning she makes just about 4,000 dollars a month...and for everything she pays she now saves around, maybe, two hundred dollars, of her paycheck, which are reserved for an emergency fund in case anything happens to her and I need to pay for a university/food/housing et cetera.

About the payment of my ticket to Spain it's been brought up before to my father who has showed not a hint of willingness to pay for some of it. In fact, any money I plan to use for my recreation there is to come out of my own pocket, which I feel fortunate enough to plan to have at least eight hundred dollars, which should be more than enough for a two month vacation, taking in mind that I'm probably going to work for my uncle in his vinyards for about five Euros an hour, which although it sounds like not much is actually a lot compared to what agricultural managers pay child labor/illegal labor, which rarely exceeds three Euros.

However, now this seems of little concern since I foresee moving to Spain indefinately just because I have a greater percentage of my family there and I, simply put, enjoy the ambience of Spain, including the night life and the work life, much more than I enjoy the monotonous and boring life of the San Diego.

Meh, you're right..but he's Jewish..and I just blurted it out.

Yeah, but, I mean, it is kind of weird that out of all the bullshit things your dad has done, you pick the fact that he's Jewish to insult him and others.

Yeah, but, I mean, it is kind of weird that out of all the bullshit things your dad has done, you pick the fact that he's Jewish to insult him and others.

In the type of community I live in, with the friends I have, it's common that the term 'Jew' is tossed around as an insult. I completely agree with the fact that using 'Jew' as an insult was completely unnecessary. However, in the rage I was in I was quick to blurt it out.

Accuse him of molesting you. That'll fix his wagon.

Then when he is homeless after losing his job and shit, you can find him and laugh at him.

Accuse him of molesting you. That'll fix his wagon.

Then when he is homeless after losing his job and shit, you can find him and laugh at him.

LOL, I would take it into consideration, but I wouldn't want to be moraless do I?