NationStates Jolt Archive

What to do you guys think of same-gender education? Personally, having attended all-boy schools all my life, I can say there are definite pros and cons. My grades, for one, have been benefitted. I manage to get A's and B+'s in most of my classes, and I got in the 1300's on my SATs (The old one, not the new one!). I feel more comfortable presenting essays from the heart in English class because no one can accuse me of being "girly" (because all the other guys have to write them to). But the major con is this: I have no interaction with girls whatsoever, and it really sux. I feel like I'm not going to be prepared for the "real world" next year when I hit college (NYU to be exact) next year. I'm gonna be too shy to talk to girls and what not, so I would say that single-gender students are behind co-ed students when it comes to social development. Any feedback?

What to do you guys think of same-gender education? Personally, having attended all-boy schools all my life, I can say there are definite pros and cons. My grades, for one, have been benefitted. I manage to get A's and B+'s in most of my classes, and I got in the 1300's on my SATs (The old one, not the new one!). I feel more comfortable presenting essays from the heart in English class because no one can accuse me of being "girly" (because all the other guys have to write them to). But the major con is this: I have no interaction with girls whatsoever, and it really sux. I feel like I'm not going to be prepared for the "real world" next year when I hit college (NYU to be exact) next year. I'm gonna be too shy to talk to girls and what not, so I would say that single-gender students are behind co-ed students when it comes to social development. Any feedback?
You call those pros?

There are only cons

I'd love to go to al all-boy school. But I'm gay, so that might skew my opinion somewhat.

I got A's and B's in all my classes and have always been in "co-ed" classes. Blaming bad grades on co-ed classrooms is asinine at best

I'm gonna be too shy to talk to girls and what not, so I would say that single-gender students are behind co-ed students when it comes to social development. Any feedback?
i went to an all guys school and i get on with girls just fine, i had a pretty normal social life outside of school where i had a mixed social group

What to do you guys think of same-gender education? Personally, having attended all-boy schools all my life, I can say there are definite pros and cons. My grades, for one, have been benefitted. I manage to get A's and B+'s in most of my classes, and I got in the 1300's on my SATs (The old one, not the new one!). I feel more comfortable presenting essays from the heart in English class because no one can accuse me of being "girly" (because all the other guys have to write them to). But the major con is this: I have no interaction with girls whatsoever, and it really sux. I feel like I'm not going to be prepared for the "real world" next year when I hit college (NYU to be exact) next year. I'm gonna be too shy to talk to girls and what not, so I would say that single-gender students are behind co-ed students when it comes to social development. Any feedback?
Don’t know mixed opinion … though I never had issues with school because of girls

Meaning I can see how it would help some concentrate … but I was enough of a geek that there really would have been no added benefit to being in a uni-sex school. I personally enjoyed interacting with females a lot during that time even if it did not distract me.

Anyways at least it is not as bad as home schooling (some of the brightest kids but some of the most socially backwards people sometimes)

From what I remember of research been done into this area, is that generally (note generally) boys do better in co-ed education and girls do better in single-sex ed.
The reason why is that as girls tend to mature faster, boys have more chance to develop their social skills which helps their learning. Girls on the other hand are generally overwhelmed by the presence of the boys and tend to be ignored (or at least not as focussed on by the teachers as the boys are). Boys tend to be more vocal and physical and so dominate classrooms more than girls.

Girls definitely form stronger friendships in sss (single sexed schools), and it will get average kids good grades but you get two stereotypes:
Everyone's a lesbian.
Everyone's desperate.
The first is definitely not true...the second...closer.
All I know is that I've been in sss since I was 2 and a half and I was fine. But without a group of close female friends I'm definitely lonelier...and with very little chance of meeting a guy.
Oh yea...and I'm shy. But I think that's just me, because I can pull out the 'I can socialise with adults' costume which was part of the act the school taught us...and a lot of my friends are definitely not shy.

I think same-gender schools just reinforce gender stereotypes rather than freeing us from them. The reality is that you have to learn how to co-exist with other genders, and that includes coming to terms with your own gendered identity.

Then again, two-gender education ALSO reinfoces gender stereotypes to a much stronger extent, and never provides you with the 'breathing' room that single-gender education might.

Some days I think I might want my girls to go to a single-gender school, and other times I'm dead set against it. I guess I don't know enough about the research to really back it or oppose it.

View points from others who've experienced it, or both systems?

I'd say put them in co-ed for their early years then single for the rest.
Don't whatever you do put them in what was once an all boys, now co-ed.
Get private if you can...or even better grammar.

Nice to see that I've stimulated some healthy debate. I'm not exactly sure how I would perform at a co-ed school, but the consensus of my peers tells me that they would not do better at a co-ed because they seem to be too hormonal. Once again, my only fear is that I'm gonna have to cope with anxiety next year at a co-ed college. My relationship with my mother isn't gonna suffice for that.

In highschool I got nearly straight A's and I went to a normal highschool...

I wouldn't have enjoyed a same sex school at all. Many other girls (especially in highschool) are bitches. In uni, they seem to be nicer. Maybe everyone's bonding under the common pressure of excessive work in my program though. Plus there are fewer girls in my classes to start with.

hmmmm. i was in mixed gender school until third grade, when i got kicked out for beating the living shit out of a kid that called me a horrible name. i went to all girls school until sixth grade. i learned more i think. but then, agian, i was pretty quiet, and liked school. i was back in a magnet school inthe seventh grade, with both girls and boys. while far more interesting, it was harder to concentrate.

i think sss would be good through maybe sixth grade, and then when you have aquired excellent study habits ,and are self motivated, then go to a regular school.

Hmmmm....you'd think you'd want to separate them around junior high, when their hormones take over and the brains shut off:) So I'd say, keep them together for elementary, then shuttle them off after that?

Hmmmm....you'd think you'd want to separate them around junior high, when their hormones take over and the brains shut off:) So I'd say, keep them together for elementary, then shuttle them off after that?
But where is the social benefit for having them in coed education for just the first part of their schooling
Why not have them be same sex the whole time then?

I mean at that young age girls are just “yucky” boys sort of thing … they really don’t achieve any social benefit out of dealing with them at that young of age … the real benefit comes later on … having to deal with people even when you are attracted to them… that’s the hard part to learn. (not to mention the social divergence males and females go through in puberty)

I think single-gender schools offer some of the finest academic programs available (I go to Fordham Prep in Bronx, NY, one of the toughest schools in NY to get into), but I think they should offer more co-ed interaction. Maybe more organized events. Our dances are so lame!

I think single-gender schools offer some of the finest academic programs available (I go to Fordham Prep in Bronx, NY, one of the toughest schools in NY to get into), but I think they should offer more co-ed interaction. Maybe more organized events. Our dances are so lame!
But is the benefit because it is single sex or is the benefit because it is a good school?

Sorry to repost so quickly, but I forgot to ask: Do you guys think that someone like me would be able to successfully assimilate into a co-ed atmosphere after nearly ten years of deprivation of the opposite gender?

Upward Thrust, its alittle of both. You need to be pretty smart to get into my school, but also willing to put up with the "no-girl" policy.

I went to a SSS in grades 9-12. It was supposed to be a more relaxed atmosphere because you didn't have to worry about how you looked or pressure to impress guys. I dunno. Most of the girls I went to school with were rich and I was definitely not. So, in my opinion, the girls tried harder to one-up each other in dress in whatnot.

I did have the advantage of forming some close friendships, which I might not have if we were busy paying attention to boys, and while my grades were mediocre, that was my fault, since I suffered from undignosed depression during that time and just didn't care.

The worry about being able to interact with the opposite sex is a real one, though. We did have dances with some of the boy's schools, so there were chances to mingle and there were classes where the boys came to our school (foreign languages and home ec), but when I got to college I felt like a fish out of water.

The first day we were there, my roommate tackled a guy in the hallway and they started going out. Sounds dumb, but she was so used to being around guys, she just joined in the fun when an impromptu football game started in the hall. I was extremely shy and spent most of my first month sitting alone in my room pretending to study.

If I had to do it all over again, I would still have chosen the SSS for high school, but I would have taken the time to join a club or two, or gotten involved in student government. Once I did that (second semester), I got used to interacting with guys in a setting that was relaxed but not reliant on the bar scene, and I did much better. Still didn't date much, but I made some male friends, and eventually, one of them introduced me to someone I dated.

Anyway, that's my experience...

Sorry to repost so quickly, but I forgot to ask: Do you guys think that someone like me would be able to successfully assimilate into a co-ed atmosphere after nearly ten years of deprivation of the opposite gender?
Yes but from what I see not as well nor as easily (and you are saying you did better because were same sex?)

My private school was co-ed, but I have a friend that goes to an all girls High School. She loves it there, but I think the really good part about her school is that there is an All Boys High School that often does things with them (i.e. dances, some trips and outings, etc).

Sorry to repost so quickly, but I forgot to ask: Do you guys think that someone like me would be able to successfully assimilate into a co-ed atmosphere after nearly ten years of deprivation of the opposite gender?
i "assimilated" within about 2 seconds of starting uni

I went to a SSS in grades 9-12. It was supposed to be a more relaxed atmosphere because you didn't have to worry about how you looked or pressure to impress guys. I dunno. Most of the girls I went to school with were rich and I was definitely not. So, in my opinion, the girls tried harder to one-up each other in dress in whatnot.
Apparantly guys try to do the same thing but with behaviour. They'll go further to impress other guys with displays of masculinity than they will to impress girls.

Sorry to repost so quickly, but I forgot to ask: Do you guys think that someone like me would be able to successfully assimilate into a co-ed atmosphere after nearly ten years of deprivation of the opposite gender?

I think so. I go to an all girls school and I don't think I'm really going to have any trouble going back to co-ed at the end of the year. I had pretty much no contact with boys that weren't family for five years. But when I got a job there were obviously guys working there and I got along with them just as easily as the female staff. It was quite easy.

But that could have been down to me being mainly friends with boys when I first started school right up until I went into sss.

Apparantly guys try to do the same thing but with behaviour. They'll go further to impress other guys with displays of masculinity than they will to impress girls.
yup. there have been a number of studies which showed that the vast majority of male posturing is not targetted toward attracting females, but rather is designed to impress or intimidate other males. indeed, many common male posturing displays are known to make women LESS attracted to the given male, so it turns out that guys are turning off women in favor of impressing other guys.

But where is the social benefit for having them in coed education for just the first part of their schooling
Why not have them be same sex the whole time then?

I mean at that young age girls are just “yucky” boys sort of thing … they really don’t achieve any social benefit out of dealing with them at that young of age … the real benefit comes later on … having to deal with people even when you are attracted to them… that’s the hard part to learn. (not to mention the social divergence males and females go through in puberty)
I dunno. I don't really suppor the idea enough to argue for it.

I'd love to go to al all-boy school. But I'm gay, so that might skew my opinion somewhat.
I do, its not as good as you'd think.

I've been in mixed gender education all my life, and sure I've spent lessons just staring at girls' bodies, but I still performing at an excellent standard, plus I've had a lot of experience with the opposite sex. I don't think that people coming from sss have any problem interacting with people from the other sex, but i dont think that mixed gender education means a lower standard of education, nor does single sex schooling mean that the students are any less distracted about looks or reputation, I know a lot of girls who dress up to compete with their m8s more then to impress lads, and loads of lads who spend as much time trying impressing guys as they do flirting with girls. I can't actually see an argument for sss, I'm not trying to bait n e 1, but can any1 who has experience in both types of education explain to me the advantage?

In my personal experience I can't imagine going to school with all girls. I think that'd suck. Alot.

For most of my highschool career most of my friends were guys, for the simple reason that teenage girls are psycho. I wasn't the type of girl who was concerned with gossip hairstyles or dieting, I was the girl that played street hockey and nintendo.

I think I would have been very alone in highschool if there were no guys around.

I went to school in a mixed sex state school, and got very good results. At the end of the day school is what you personally make of it. I am now at the sixth form of the school I attended and still achieving well, as are most of my peers.
As I said school is what you make of it, if you work hard, the presence of the opposite sex with have no effect, and has little effect on most people, from my experience.

You're right, the school enviornment is what you make of it. I haven't been around girls much, but I think I should be fine. Sure I'll be in puberty till I'm 22, but thats a choice I've made. Its kinda sad that at 18 I'll be learning what you guys learned at around 13 though.

You're right, the school enviornment is what you make of it. I haven't been around girls much, but I think I should be fine. Sure I'll be in puberty till I'm 22, but thats a choice I've made. Its kinda sad that at 18 I'll be learning what you guys learned at around 13 though.
do you not have any girlfriends? any friends that are girls full stop?

When I started the topic, I stated that I attend an all-boy school and that I don't know any girls. My friends are the same way, they don't know any either. We live in the suburbs in Westchester, NY, U.S. and girls are very hard to find. I probably won't meet any until college.

When I started the topic, I stated that I attend an all-boy school and that I don't know any girls. My friends are the same way, they don't know any either. We live in the suburbs in Westchester, NY, U.S. and girls are very hard to find. I probably won't meet any until college.
thats nothing to do with going to an all boy school...

i did, in fact my whole school did, and 99% of them had a "normal" level of interaction with girls outside school

seems your problem is a lack of effort...

Look, mate, girls are a different game on this side of the Atlantic. I don't know how Irish girls respond to random approaches, but here in America, or at least New York, you can't just walk up to any girl you want. There are cliques and social classes to be taken into account, plus ethnicites. Besides, I've seen some of my friends try oly to watch them get shot down miserably.

Personally, the more I think about it, the less I seem to care. I really can't relate to girls anyway. I'm majoring in Business and Sports Management. What girl would ever take those classes. Lastly, not to sound sexist or anything, but is the opposite gender neccessary for personal survival? No.

Look, mate, girls are a different game on this side of the Atlantic. I don't know how Irish girls respond to random approaches, but here in America, or at least New York, you can't just walk up to any girl you want. There are cliques and social classes to be taken into account, plus ethnicites. Besides, I've seen some of my friends try oly to watch them get shot down miserably.
thats shit

say im 15. i would go into to town with my group of mates, male and female, and we would meet some other kids about our age - male and female, and then we would all go hang out or skate about or something. you would just talk to someone, sure there were cliques or groups, but you would just talk to them...or youd be sitting on a bench talking to someone and someone else would sit down beside you and you would end up talking to them as well

then i would go back to school with a few of the guys from that group of friends, and the same thing would happen the next saturday

although, it might be a reflection of the fact that Northern Irish society in general is very friendly, people have a tendency to talk to each other and get on

Personally, the more I think about it, the less I seem to care. I really can't relate to girls anyway. I'm majoring in Business and Sports Management. What girl would ever take those classes. Lastly, not to sound sexist or anything, but is the opposite gender neccessary for personal survival? No.
Yes, what girl could possibly have an interest in sport, or want to seek a future occupation in business. That is just nonsense. [/sarcasm]

You live in your world, I live in mine. People try to act so tough and violent here, its not even funny. You look at the wrong person and you could end up getting stabbed. How are Irish women, hot?

Yes, what girl could possibly have an interest in sport, or want to seek a future occupation in business. That is just nonsense. [/sarcasm]
Sadly a lot of girls don’t think they can do a lot of things

The last 3 years in my networking major/post grad classes …. Not 1 single girl (there are 4 in the whole major … I just have not had the pleasure of being in a class with them)

Its sad … I miss conversing with females about class *tear

Cookies, relax, I was ranting (not to be taken seriously)

You live in your world, I live in mine. People try to act so tough and violent here, its not even funny. You look at the wrong person and you could end up getting stabbed.
that makes me very glad to live where i live

How are Irish women, hot?
for the most part

I went to co-ed public schools, so I'm no expert, but it's my understanding that there's a lot of buggery at all-male institutions. I mean, why else do the Brits call the underclassmen "fags"? And what exactly do the duties of the "head boy" include?

I went to co-ed public schools, so I'm no expert, but it's my understanding that there's a lot of buggery at all-male institutions. I mean, why else do the Brits call the underclassmen "fags"? And what exactly do the duties of the "head boy" include?
thats only in the posh schools

we had a head boy...he didnt actually do anything, it just looked good on his CV

Sadly a lot of girls don’t think they can do a lot of things

The last 3 years in my networking major/post grad classes …. Not 1 single girl (there are 4 in the whole major … I just have not had the pleasure of being in a class with them)

Its sad … I miss conversing with females about class *tear
:(:(:( poor girls boxed into their gender roles.

I went to co-ed public schools, so I'm no expert, but it's my understanding that there's a lot of buggery at all-male institutions. I mean, why else do the Brits call the underclassmen "fags"? And what exactly do the duties of the "head boy" include?
No no no, there are no gay people in all boys... well very few. Guys hate faggots fool.

My school's disciplinary code is very strict. You so much as threaten some1, you're out. But then again, if you're gonna act like an a-hole, people are just gonna marginalize you anyway. Thats at any school.

Cookies, relax, I was ranting (not to be taken seriously)
If you'll do me the pleasure of re-reading my post you might notice it wasn't to be taken so seriously either.

Most single-gender schools try to get their students to operate outside gender sterotypes. At my school, boys are encouraged to be more emotional, particpate in the arts, and perform community service. I dunno what co-ed schools do, I've never been to one.

Personally, the more I think about it, the less I seem to care. I really can't relate to girls anyway. I'm majoring in Business and Sports Management. What girl would ever take those classes. Lastly, not to sound sexist or anything, but is the opposite gender neccessary for personal survival? No.

To avoid sarcasm (which is my strong suit), I will share some of my college experience with you. I worked in an office on-campus and we had people with all different majors. I think there were just as many girls in the school of business as there were guys. As for sports management, you are going to end up taking some of the same classes as people who are into sports therapy and other majors, so you better get used to the idea of coed classes (unless you attend an all male college).

Here's my advice to you: Don't worry about meeting girls for the purpose of dating. Treat all your classmates with respect and you will find that you will have things in common with both men and women. Once you find that common ground, I think you will find you will have friends and acquaintances that are both male and female. And if that common ground and friendship leads to romance, that's an added bonus.

I think perhaps some of the reasons your friends are striking out is that they are pursuing girls for the sole purpose of finding a girlfriend. Let's face it, we all want love and companionship, but you gotta walk before you run. Work on getting to know the women you will have classes with and let things go from there.

Thanks for the advice. Yeah, I'm going to NYU, so I know that theres gonna be girls there. But not just any girls, though, the prissy New Yorker ones that wear all Gucci and only got in because of their parents' salaries, not their SAT scores.

Do I regret not having had my first kiss yet or being able to go to the prom, but I think have alittle more positivity to help me in the future. None of my other friends are going either though, so its all good. It just suck that my high school experience had to be like this. Unless I get a damn good career becuase of all this "preparatory" schooling, I can say that single gender schooling is a waste.

Do I regret not having had my first kiss yet or being able to go to the prom, but I think have alittle more positivity to help me in the future. None of my other friends are going either though, so its all good. It just suck that my high school experience had to be like this. Unless I get a damn good career becuase of all this "preparatory" schooling, I can say that single gender schooling is a waste.
I had my first kiss in "high school" with a fellow student...

Just wanted to rub it in :D

Sorry.

Do I regret not having had my first kiss yet or being able to go to the prom,
you didnt have a formal?

we had one...you just invited a female friend of your choice

youre school really must have sucked

you didnt have a formal?

we had one...you just invited a female friend of your choice

youre school really must have sucked

Whether they had one or not is irrelevant, since he didn't know any girls to ask...

Whether they had one or not is irrelevant, since he didn't know any girls to ask...
fair point