NationStates Jolt Archive

It's been suggested, it's been tossed around as an idea--now here it is. I am officially forming the Official Church of Jesussaves, a place dedicated to the worship of our favorite little troll. Now don't get me wrong, I recognize this is going to be a big task. We'll need ministers, parishoners, a collection of his wise words, and of course a half dozen small animals for regular sacrifices...but I think we can do this.

I actually regularly do a search on his posts just to see whats new. This guy is great.

The first commandment shall be "evidence and reason shall be shunned - only believe the unsupportable".

Ya know, the last thread (which I posted in before) like this, got the lock

hmmm, didn't realize there was a lock before...heh heh, not meant to disrespect him any--i find him hilarious...don't know what i'd do without him around to read.

I surmise this thread will be short-lived, but I am a big fan of Jesussaves.

i wonder if we'd have more success if one of us started their own church? what are they locking for?

i wonder if we'd have more success if one of us started their own church? what are they locking for?

The last one was locked pending moderation review. Possible flamebait.

Ya know, the last thread (which I posted in before) like this, got the lock
Mine too.:(

2) Thou shalt blame the Muslims and homosexuals for all of societies ills, they are stinky in mine sight.

Thou shalt live and let live on a free internet.

Thou shalt believe that God actually cares what you think...

Thou shalt spell "parrot" correctly.

Thou shalt not encourage "athiests" to have gay sex with satanists.

Thou shalt believe that God actually cares what you think...
Scratch that, "Thou shalt believe that thou art God, supreme"

Thou shalt not encourage "athiests" to have gay sex with satanists.

Dammit, I'm out.

I think we should put he and VoteEarly in a ring and let them slug it out. With a parrot.

Perhaps Commando2 could be the ref?

How about the 'Lets start a thread on NationStates and pillory an easy target hahaha roflcakes' school? That would attract lots of signatories for sure.

To be fair, we should probably throw in some trolls from the other end of the spectrum as well.

I think we should put he and VoteEarly in a ring and let them slug it out. With a parrot.
Done (http://www.googlefight.com/index.php?lang=en_GB&word1=Jesussaves&word2=Vote+Early)

No, here.

parrot! (http://www.googlefight.com/index.php?lang=en_GB&word1=Jesussaves+with+a+parrot&word2=Vote+Early+with+a+parrot)

Perhaps Commando2 could be the ref?

Perhaps, Skapedroe?
Yay! (http://www.googlefight.com/index.php?lang=en_GB&word1=Skapedroe&word2=Jesussaves)

No, here.

parrot! (http://www.googlefight.com/index.php?lang=en_GB&word1=Jesussaves+with+a+parrot&word2=Vote+Early+with+a+parrot)
:D Great!

From the other end maybe we could have Dark Imperial Rome. I think he could take them both.

Here's the "logo" for the new Church:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v713/Swimmi/Jesussaves.jpg

Credit for original photograph to
http://crittarka.deviantart.com/

Done (http://www.googlefight.com/index.php?lang=en_GB&word1=Jesussaves&word2=Vote+Early)
Wrong. VoteEarly is one word.

Here, done! (http://www.googlefight.com/index.php?lang=en_GB&word1=Jesussaves&word2=VoteEarly)

Here's the "logo" for the new Church:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v713/Swimmi/Jesussaves.jpg

Credit for original photograph to
http://crittarka.deviantart.com/

That is quite possibly the most disturbing thing I've ever seen.

Wrong. VoteEarly is one word.

Here, done! (http://www.googlefight.com/index.php?lang=en_GB&word1=Jesussaves&word2=VoteEarly)

This changes the results some.

parrot reloaded! (http://www.googlefight.com/index.php?lang=en_GB&word1=Jesussaves+with+a+parrot&word2=VoteEarly+with+a+parrot)

This changes the results some.

parrot reloaded! (http://www.googlefight.com/index.php?lang=en_GB&word1=Jesussaves+with+a+parrot&word2=VoteEarly+with+a+parrot)
Not half as much as this (http://www.googlefight.com/index.php?lang=en_GB&word1=Parrot&word2=Jesussaves+and+VoteEarly)

That is quite possibly the most disturbing thing I've ever seen.
Well, this is The Official Church of Jesussaves we're talking about here.

my favourite quote being a catholic

"Catholics are pagans who worship Mary as a goddess and pray to saints and to a pope who they think is god. I cant send you to hell. Your blasfemy is going to do that. "

notice the BLASPHEMOUS spelling, I'm not usually a grammer nazi but u know this time it feels good

Thou shalt cast Darwin, Harry Potter, Thomas the Tank Engine, anything by Dr. Zeus and other blasphemous works into a fire where the pure sin shall burn them into nothing.

Why must people like you go and slander the name of the good Lord? I mean, are you actually going to worship in this so-called Church of yours? Think of what God will say when you stand before him in Heaven! To think that such ignorance and blashpemy exists in our modern society!

It's been suggested, it's been tossed around as an idea--now here it is. I am officially forming the Official Church of Jesussaves, a place dedicated to the worship of our favorite little troll. Now don't get me wrong, I recognize this is going to be a big task. We'll need ministers, parishoners, a collection of his wise words, and of course a half dozen small animals for regular sacrifices...but I think we can do this.

I actually regularly do a search on his posts just to see whats new. This guy is great.

Does Jesusaves allow Preach craft? If not than you don't need ministers because they sell they craft for money.

What is a Parishoner?

Thou shalt believe the onion articles as true stories

Ah, my young church grows. :)

Thou shall be with sin and still be allowed to cast the first stone when people do something that I (Jesussave) believes is slightly risque

all hail jesussaves!!
(starts bowing up and down) we're not worthy, we're not worthy :cool:

Heres some classics:

God has blessed America but America hs turned it's back on God. Its no wonder tha He let us get atacked on 911. Notice that the terrorists hit new yourk, and washington. New york is home to many gays abortionists feminists pagans and people who make fun of Jesus. Washington is home to the courts that make laws to take Jesus out of schools and let women kill their babies. God was angry and lifted his veil of protection. Pray that we find our way back to him and he restores it.

I can't undrstand why people hate the America. We do so much good for the owrld. We stopped hitler we stopped communism, we spread democrasy and freedom. We have the freeest and strongest country in the world and we use it to help people. Plus we are a christian nation and we spread the word of the lord. Why do you hate us?

Gay marriage should be banned. It says in the Bible that a man who lays with anothe man should be put to death. Insted librals want to let them get married. Letting gays get married is against gods law and violates freedom of religion. Gays are an abomination and god made Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve.

Blair said iran and siria have been sending terrorists into iraqu and that they are sponsers of terrorsim. This is more proof that moslems just want to spread their hate.

Jesus loves you. It's a fact. He dyed for you. Ask him to come in to your life and he will set you free.

Thou shall spell 'Syria' as Siria' and 'democracy' as 'democrasy'

Thou shall worship the English 'President' known as Blair. The Queen and the title of Prime Minister have never existed.

Jesus loves you. It's a fact. He dyed for you.
:lol:

Legendary.

The "he dyed for you" quote and all the responses to it, are actually what first made me follow his writings. I must say, you've touched something close to my heart. And nice job compiling the first few passages of our holy book!

Repent and turn away from this false idol, children. He will only lead you down the false path.

Turn to the almighty Maxbarry, the Creator of Our World! For you shall be blessed and have the Protection of the Mods upon thee! Praise Max!

This parrot you speak of...
It must be that parrot from Monty Python. He's pining for the fjords!

I think the dead parrot would win though. :p

This is the Third Commandment that God gave Moses ... Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain: for the Lord will not hold him guiltless that taketh his name in vain.

Jesus reconciles people with God. He gave his life as a sacrifice to God for the sins of humanity.

As for a person using the log-on name of Jesussaves, I hope the intentions of that writer are good, and I pray that he does not distort the words of Jesus Christ.

Being critical of people who have faith seems a bit silly. It only proves one part of what Jesus said about being a Christian: That others will ridicule Christians. Being a person who attackes Christians also shows a lack of compassion for people who express beliefs different than yours.

In any event, I recommend against mocking Christians or members of any other religion. This form of "humor" is not becoming. It is not funny. It shows no creativity. It just shows that you have a mean-spirited heart.

Long after the 10 Commandments, Jesus reminded people of some other laws. Love God with all of your mind, body, strength and spirit. Love your neighbor as you love yourself. In fact, even love your "enemies."

To be fair, we should probably throw in some trolls from the other end of the spectrum as well.

I'll gladly take the role of the Satan troll!

(Evil Satanic laugh: Mahahahahaha.)

Posted by the Satanic Priest, Lord Medivh

This is the Third Commandment that God gave Moses ... Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain: for the Lord will not hold him guiltless that taketh his name in vain.

Jesus reconciles people with God. He gave his life as a sacrifice to God for the sins of humanity.

As for a person using the log-on name of Jesussaves, I hope the intentions of that writer are good, and I pray that he does not distort the words of Jesus Christ.

Being critical of people who have faith seems a bit silly. It only proves one part of what Jesus said about being a Christian: That others will ridicule Christians. Being a person who attackes Christians also shows a lack of compassion for people who express beliefs different than yours.

In any event, I recommend against mocking Christians or members of any other religion. This form of "humor" is not becoming. It is not funny. It shows no creativity. It just shows that you have a mean-spirited heart.

Long after the 10 Commandments, Jesus reminded people of some other laws. Love God with all of your mind, body, strength and spirit. Love your neighbor as you love yourself. In fact, even love your "enemies."

Odd that, I thought God was supposed to be vengeful to his enemies and cast all sinners into the fiery pit for all eternity.

It seems religious people can pick and choose when they want God to be a) kind or b ) nasty.

question for NS General Christians:

doesn't it bother you when somebody makes an internet handle like "Jesussaves"? i mean, the Savior is pretty much the cornerstone of your entire belief system, and here you have some random kid using the Savior as a forum login...doesn't that sort of cheapen it?

Odd that, I thought God was supposed to be vengeful to his enemies and cast all sinners into the fiery pit for all eternity.

It seems religious people can pick and choose when they want God to be a) kind or b ) nasty.

religeons like that,choose the bits you like, ignore the rest

question for NS General Christians:

doesn't it bother you when somebody makes an internet handle like "Jesussaves"? i mean, the Savior is pretty much the cornerstone of your entire belief system, and here you have some random kid using the Savior as a forum login...doesn't that sort of cheapen it?

if i were a christian i guess it would piss me off. same as any religeons messiah

It seems religious people can pick and choose when they want God to be a) kind or b ) nasty.
that's how religion is for most believers; they already have a moral code, a strong set of values, and a perspective on the universe, they just decide that (for whatever reason) they need to convince themselves that they are RIGHT and that an all-powerful being agrees with them. they pick whichever God and whichever pieces of a given religion they feel match up with the beliefs they already have. they don't have the strength of character to live by their values unless they can make up a really big bully who will beat up anybody who has different values.

Let me be a priest in the Church of Jesussaves please, I need the tax break!!
I have tried to start a religion on several occasions....
It doesnt work out unless you have some nice rituals, usually involving sex, drugs, booze or animals.(or all of the above!)

So why doesn't someone make up some rituals for us to follow?!

if i were a christian i guess it would piss me off. same as any religeons messiah
i honestly just feel it is really disrespectful to use a name like that. even though i feel the same way about Jesus as i do about Santa, i respect that many people have strong feelings about Jesus and i try not to be unnecessarily insulting. i know that if i believed strongly in Jesus i would be bothered by "Jesussaves" as a 'net handle, but i haven't yet seen any actual Christians complaining. don't know if that's because they don't care, or because they are too polite to want to bring it up.

all hail jesussaves!!
(starts bowing up and down) we're not worthy, we're not worthy :cool:
http://67.18.37.14/108/141/emo/worship.gif http://67.18.37.14/108/141/emo/worship.gif http://67.18.37.14/108/141/emo/worship.gif

The question bugs me - is Jesussaves real?

It's as niggling as the whole area 51 thing.

Seriously, how does someone like that crawl onto the web? I'm all for faith, but ignorant faith is no faith at all.

Let me be a priest in the Church of Jesussaves please, I need the tax break!!
Three words:
Universal Life Church (http://www.ulc.org/).

I think you can get a tax break off that, or at least you used to be able to.

Being critical of people who have faith seems a bit silly. It only proves one part of what Jesus said about being a Christian: That others will ridicule Christians. Being a person who attackes Christians also shows a lack of compassion for people who express beliefs different than yours.
I agree that being critical of those who have faith just for having faith is silly. However, I think that much of the flak that Christians get is the perception that they have no compassion or tolerance for those different from them.

The question bugs me - is Jesussaves real?

It's as niggling as the whole area 51 thing.

Seriously, how does someone like that crawl onto the web? I'm all for faith, but ignorant faith is no faith at all.
If not, do you think maybe he's a regular playing a little trick?
If so, I'm curious as to who it might be.

Wow, this thread has escaped theLock! Will the M0ds leave it open?

question for NS General Christians:

doesn't it bother you when somebody makes an internet handle like "Jesussaves"? i mean, the Savior is pretty much the cornerstone of your entire belief system, and here you have some random kid using the Savior as a forum login...doesn't that sort of cheapen it?

As a Christian it's pretty safe to say that it doesn't cheapen Jesus. For me, that would take a lot more than an ignorant, intolerant kid who can't spell Muslim and Syria, but it does cheapen the kid. I don't know if he reasonably expects me to take him seriously with a login like that one, but I know that I the moment I see it I feel free to ignore whatever comes out of his mouth.

Or I would, if it wasn't so fun to laugh at.

In any event, I recommend against mocking Christians or members of any other religion. This form of "humor" is not becoming. It is not funny. It shows no creativity. It just shows that you have a mean-spirited heart.


As I said before, I have no intent of mocking him or christians. I don't think I've mentioned christians in the whole thread. Mocking has such a negative connotation. Jesussaves is cool. The kid really amuses me, as I used to be kinda like that. Yes, believe it or not, a fundementalist became a pagan. Go figure. Heh heh. But yes, yes I have a mean-spirited heart in general.

I suppose another part of my interest is in whether or not he's real. Every now and then my belief in him being real is kicked one way or the other. But that's the real fun of it!

Being critical of people who have faith seems a bit silly. It only proves one part of what Jesus said about being a Christian: That others will ridicule Christians.

okay, let me get this straight: somebody writes a story about a guy who walks on water, does magic tricks, and rises from the dead, but then puts in the caveat that other people probably will be critical of the story...so we all shouldn't be critical of the story because we might prove the author right?

sorry, not buying that one.

Being a person who attackes Christians also shows a lack of compassion for people who express beliefs different than yours.

i don't attack CHRISTIANS, i attack CHRISTIANITY. like how i don't attack racists, i attack racism. they are free to express beliefs different from mine, but i will endulge in my freedom to express my opinion about those beliefs. i will especially express my criticisms of their beliefs if i feel they have serious flaws in their logic (or an utter lack thereof), and even more especially if they use their possibly-flawed beliefs as a foundation for attempting legal action or social change.


In any event, I recommend against mocking Christians or members of any other religion. This form of "humor" is not becoming. It is not funny. It shows no creativity. It just shows that you have a mean-spirited heart.

you may not find it funny, but i think it can be hillarious. jokes about religion aren't automatically funny, because it's possible to make a crappy joke on virtually any subject, but they aren't automatically non-funny either. indeed, there is a great deal of quality humor that ridicules belief systems like religions, political parties, cultural excentricities, and any number of similar "in-group" modes.

you may not find something funny, but it's pointless of you to try to assert that something "isn't funny" in general; it's funny if even one person finds it so, because it's funny to that person, and i can promise you that there are PLENTY of people who find religious jokes very very funny. you can try to insult them all and call them mean-spirited if you want, but somehow i doubt they will care...i sure don't :).

You a Pagan? You ever been to the summer solistice in Avebury, England? I recommend that, even though I'm not a Pagan. It was good fun. I don't recommend the winter solistice there. Too cold by half.

As I said before, I have no intent of mocking him or christians. I don't think I've mentioned christians in the whole thread. Mocking has such a negative connotation. Jesussaves is cool. The kid really amuses me, as I used to be kinda like that. Yes, believe it or not, a fundementalist became a pagan. Go figure. Heh heh. But yes, yes I have a mean-spirited heart in general.

I suppose another part of my interest is in whether or not he's real. Every now and then my belief in him being real is kicked one way or the other. But that's the real fun of it!
You're a pagan? As in the outlaw biker gang?

You a Pagan? You ever been to the summer solistice in Avebury, England? I recommend that, even though I'm not a Pagan. It was good fun. I don't recommend the winter solistice there. Too cold by half.

Heh heh, I live in the states, but I plan on doing a lot of traveling in the next few years. I'll definitly have to check it out! Thanks!!

You're a pagan? As in the outlaw biker gang?

Heh heh, nope, the "country-dweller" kind. ;)

Great idea, Jesussaves is hilarious :P

More wisdom from the mighty leader:

America is in a crisis today. Children are being raised by sexy tv programms and godless secular humanist schoolls. We are seeing kids become pregnanat become killers and become drug adicts. Where are theyr mothers? I'll tell you where at work. Women at work are trying to prove that they are just like men. They are trying to buy the next suv or desiner dress. In the olden days women took care of children. Taut them wright from wrong. Read to them from the bible. Now kids are on there own. Some lezbians even want to raise kids. What will they teach them the diffrence between dildos and vibrators?


Thou shalt act as if this is 13th Century A.D

Ok, I'm a Christian and I'm complaining. Jesussaves is giving the rest of us a bad name by being so ridiculously intolernant to the point of hilarity. I wish he would either A) Knock it the f-ck off or B) Consider mediating his opinions so the don't seem so rude and intolerant. I have to agree, he is funny though, but he's obviously completely missed the point of religion as do so many others.