NationStates Jolt Archive

Well where else did devil worship that directly opposes christianity come from?

*pushes away the rabid christians and satanists* It was supposed to be a joke! And not a very good one at that as I read through it again... c.c

You know what I haven't had in a while?

Big League Chew.

The Bible doesn't *cause* Satanism, homosexuals, Jews, and Democrats do.

The Bible doesn't *cause* Satanism, homosexuals, Jews, and Democrats do.
And Harry Potter. Can't forget Harry Potter.

And Harry Potter. Can't forget Harry Potter.
Dammit, I knew I forgot something. Satan must be attempting to corrupt me as we speak!

A what what what? Big League Chew?

I believe there had been some very prominent Christian homosexuals, Democrats and Jews. Like the Archbishop of Canterbury, no wait he's just not anti-gay... oh and John Kerry, wasn't he and a Catholic, and... uh... a Christian Jew... uh, gimme a sec, I'll comeup with something... *stratches head*

You know what I haven't had in a while?

Big League Chew.

ROTFLMAO!!!! :D

thats Peter from Family guy who said that if you didn't know

Well where else did devil worship that directly opposes christianity come from?

*pushes away the rabid christians and satanists* It was supposed to be a joke! And not a very good one at that as I read through it again... c.c
Your joke was terrible.

You know what I haven't had in a while?

Big League Chew.

LOL

Haven't thought of Big League Chew in 10 years, at least.

This thread is the proof that the Bible causes bad jokes. :p

A Christian Jew, lets see, i'm sure there at least one, a story book was writen on him, what was it called, the Bible?. He walked around in a Dress and long hair, he wore sandles and told storys that didn't realy aswere the question.

I think his name was Santa
:confused:

This thread is the proof that the Bible causes bad jokes. :p
I'll have to disagree with you there, it's just that the above one wasn't one of the good ones. Hell, Monty Python and the Holy Grail is a testament to just how much humour you can squeeze out of the bible. I'm just sorry I had to inflict that joke on you all, but I was bored.

You know what I haven't had in a while?

Big League Chew.
Man that stuff is awesome. Why don't they make all gum like that so YOU choose how much you want, not some corporate bigwig who says "here is how much gum you should have in your mouth at once?" :D

Messianic Jews, folks. About as close to Christian Jews or Jewish Christians as you can get. :)

The Bible doesn't *cause* Satanism, homosexuals, Jews, and Democrats do.


WTF? you are an ignorant bigot!

The Bible doesn't *cause* Satanism, homosexuals, Jews, and Democrats do.

WTF? you are an ignorant bigot!

Correct me if I'm wrong, Arammanar, but I beleive that was sarcasm SummerTyme.

(I'm as lefty as they get, and even I saw the sarcasm there. quite funny Arammanar, btw)

Well where else did devil worship that directly opposes christianity come from?

*pushes away the rabid christians and satanists* It was supposed to be a joke! And not a very good one at that as I read through it again... c.c

You fool! Satanism has been around since the Seventh Century! And Christianity only been around since the Fourteenth Century. Also Satan wasn't known as a "evil" or "Bad guy" at all until Christianity began.

"The wholeheartedly accept the Christian evaluation of the word Satan at face value, and ignore the fact that the term became synonymous with evil simply because it was (A) of Hebrew origin, and anything Jewish was of the Devil, and (B) because it meant adversary or opposite."

"With all the debate over the origin of the word witch, and the clear origins of the word Satan one would think that logic would rule, and Satan would be accepted as a more sensibly explained label. Even if one recognizes the character inversion employed in changing Dionysus also known as Pan (the good guy) into Satan (the bad guy), why reject an old friend just because he bears a new name and unjustified stigma?"
"Book of The Rites of Lucifer" 4:8-9 Passage from the "Satanic Bible".

Good thing there's a Satanic Priest here to explain the truth about Satanism! Otherwise people would only know the Christians made up bullsh*t about Satanism.

Posted by Satanic Priest, Lord Medivh

You fool! Satanism has been around since the Seventh Century! And Christianity only been around since the Fourteenth Century. Also Satan wasn't known as a "evil" or "Bad guy" at all until Christianity began.

"The wholeheartedly accept the Christian evaluation of the word Satan at face value, and ignore the fact that the term became synonymous with evil simply because it was (A) of Hebrew origin, and anything Jewish was of the Devil, and (B) because it meant adversary or opposite."

"With all the debate over the origin of the word witch, and the clear origins of the word Satan one would think that logic would rule, and Satan would be accepted as a more sensibly explained label. Even if one recognizes the character inversion employed in changing Dionysus also known as Pan (the good guy) into Satan (the bad guy), why reject an old friend just because he bears a new name and unjustified stigma?"
"Book of The Rites of Lucifer" 4:8-9 Passage from the "Satanic Bible".

Good thing there's a Satanic Priest here to explain the truth about Satanism! Otherwise people would only know the Christians made up bullsh*t about Satanism.

Posted by Satanic Priest, Lord Medivh
What's your impression of the "Harry Potter books cause Satanism" thread. Please don't comment on the title alone. Skim through the thread a bit, if you don't mind.

You fool! Satanism has been around since the Seventh Century! And Christianity only been around since the Fourteenth Century. Also Satan wasn't known as a "evil" or "Bad guy" at all until Christianity began.

"The wholeheartedly accept the Christian evaluation of the word Satan at face value, and ignore the fact that the term became synonymous with evil simply because it was (A) of Hebrew origin, and anything Jewish was of the Devil, and (B) because it meant adversary or opposite."

"With all the debate over the origin of the word witch, and the clear origins of the word Satan one would think that logic would rule, and Satan would be accepted as a more sensibly explained label. Even if one recognizes the character inversion employed in changing Dionysus also known as Pan (the good guy) into Satan (the bad guy), why reject an old friend just because he bears a new name and unjustified stigma?"
"Book of The Rites of Lucifer" 4:8-9 Passage from the "Satanic Bible".

Good thing there's a Satanic Priest here to explain the truth about Satanism! Otherwise people would only know the Christians made up bullsh*t about Satanism.

Posted by Satanic Priest, Lord MedivhOh be quiet. I know perfectly well that the (current) devil is an amalgamation of numerous pagan gods, formulated for the specific purpose of converting pagans to christianity.

... wait... Christianity has only been around since the 14th century?... an estimate using the year system based on the birth of Jesus of Nazareth - the Messiah of Christianity.

Oh be quiet. I know perfectly well that the (current) devil is an amalgamation of numerous pagan gods, formulated for the specific purpose of converting pagans to christianity.

... wait... Christianity has only been around since the 14th century?... an estimate using the year system based on the birth of Jesus of Nazareth - the Messiah of Christianity.

I meant that Satan wasn't evil until Christianity and Satanism has been around much longer then Christianity. And don't forget, that Christianity started after his birth, not at his birth, and besides Jesus was just another idoit claiming to be "God" or "Son of God".

Man creates his own gods in his own image.

Posted by the Satanic Priest, Lord Medivh

So Lord Medivh, if you create your god in your own image.....Satan is like you. SAVE ME!!!!!!!!!!! BAPTIZE ME!!!!!!!!!!!

As absurd as that whole Harry Potter causes Satanism thread. If only there was a minimum dumbass level for NS.

Christianity only existed from the 14th century onwards?

What were all those whacky Crusaders doing from 1095 - 1291? And what exactly was that nutty Constantine I doing back around 300AD if Christianity didn't exist?

Perhaps you mean "Christianity as we currently know it"? Even then, it doesn't really sound terribly plausible.

As absurd as that whole Harry Potter causes Satanism thread. If only there was a minimum dumbass level for NS.
it was meant to be absurd. I take great relish in taking other peoples writings and just changing the keys words to create a parody. It means less typing. :D

I meant that Satan wasn't evil until Christianity and Satanism has been around much longer then Christianity. And don't forget, that Christianity started after his birth, not at his birth, and besides Jesus was just another idoit claiming to be "God" or "Son of God".

Man creates his own gods in his own image.

Posted by the Satanic Priest, Lord MedivhSatan wasn't evil for a couple of centuries after Christianity started.

Satanism hasn't been around longer than Christianity, it's not even a uniform religion in the slightest. So stop trying to act like the purveyor of all knowledge satanist. Satanism is either a response to the rigid conformity of the christian church or the revival of an ancient religion and has no right to be renamed satanism.

So Christianity started 25 years or so after his birth once the day had gathered a few disciples. And I don't believe Jesus ever claimed to be God or the son of, rather his disciples did that for him after his death.

And Harry Potter. Can't forget Harry Potter.

PROOF THAT HARRY POTTER IS DEVIL'S WRITING!
Change every word Wand to Wang. And see what you get. JK Rowling is a VERY VERY VERY DIRTY LITTLE WOMEN.

PROOF THAT HARRY POTTER IS DEVIL'S WRITING!
Change every word Wand to Wang. And see what you get. JK Rowling is a VERY VERY VERY DIRTY LITTLE WOMEN.


Who's dirty, the one who writes the novel or the one who inserts naughty words into it?

Thou art witches, every one! Burn, burn, for thou art with Satan! I say Goody Layertb with the Devil!

A Christian Jew, lets see, i'm sure there at least one, a story book was writen on him, what was it called, the Bible?. He walked around in a Dress and long hair, he wore sandles and told storys that didn't realy aswere the question.

I think his name was Santa
:confused:

Or maybe John Kerry during his protesting days? :rolleyes:

Satan wasn't evil for a couple of centuries after Christianity started.

Job 1:6
"One day the angels came to present themselves before God, and Satan the accuser came with them..."

The book Job predates the advent of modern Christianity by 12 centuries. The context of the writing clearly suggests that Satan is opposed to God, i.e. he is evil.


Satanism hasn't been around longer than Christianity, it's not even a uniform religion in the slightest. So stop trying to act like the purveyor of all knowledge satanist. Satanism is either a response to the rigid conformity of the christian church or the revival of an ancient religion and has no right to be renamed satanism.

So Christianity started 25 years or so after his birth once the day had gathered a few disciples. And I don't believe Jesus ever claimed to be God or the son of, rather his disciples did that for him after his death.

John 10:30
(Jesus speaking) "The Father and I are ONE." {emphasis added.}

Job 1:6


John 10:30
(Jesus speaking) "The Father and I are ONE." {emphasis added.}

And some would argue that those aren't actually the words Jesus spoke, that they were attributed to him some time after his crucifiction.

You could also argue that he was speaking figuratively rather than literally.

What's your impression of the "Harry Potter books cause Satanism" thread. Please don't comment on the title alone. Skim through the thread a bit, if you don't mind.

I just got done reading that thread and it was one the most...... Stupid and most funny thread I have ever read! Everyone that posted in that thread is a freaking moron or they were just joking around.

Here are my points of view from that thread...

First of all...

1.The "Harry Potter" books says nothing about Satanism and nothing in the Harry Potter books are done in Satanism!!!

2.Everybody should be able to read any book they want.

3.Magic doesn't work.

4.Even if she could summon the 3 headed dog of Hell, I highly doubt he would appear in the mortal world for a 9 year old girl. (If he is real.)

5.The 9 year old should not be stoped from reading "forbidden" books, unless the parent or legal guardian does not want their kids reading "forbidden" books. Until the child is the age of 18. But even if the parents are againist letting their kids read "forbidden" books, they should have done a better job of keeping "bad" books out of her reach.

6.That 9 year old girl shouldn't be saying that "the Bible is nothing but lies" unless she has read the whole Bible, and I doubt a 9 year old has read and understand the Bible completely. Because that's the same as someone saying "The Satanic (or Holy) Bible is full of lies" but they know nothing about what they are talking about because they haven't read it or they see a cover of a book then they say they hate the book just from it's cover. And when someone does that it will only make them appear as the idoits they are.

7.The author of the "Harry Potter" books knows nothing about Satanism. I bet a million dollars that the author doesn't know anything about it and I bet she hasn't even read the Satanic Bible, Necronomicon, or any other black magic books.

8.The book "Necronomicon" has nothing to do with Satanism. The "Necronomicon" is only about casting magic, and the history of the book of the dead. (If you believe that crap.)

9.The "Necronomicon" is a real book, I have the paperback version. Hahaha. Even though I don't believe in the book, it's a fun read. Nothing harmful in the book.

10.Jesussaves says that dinosaurs are from the bones of the Devil, and says that "even though scientists say dinosaurs are animals, they are not."

Is he joking? Or is he really that dumb?

Hopefully this clears up the bullsh*t about Harry Pothead and Satanism.

Posted by the Satanic Priest, Lord Medivh

10.Jesussaves says that dinosaurs are from the bones of the Devil, and says that "even though scientists say dinosaurs are animals, they are not."

Is he joking? Or is he really that dumb?
Jesussaves is what he is. You just have to laugh and take him for face value.

Satan wasn't evil for a couple of centuries after Christianity started.

Satanism hasn't been around longer than Christianity, it's not even a uniform religion in the slightest. So stop trying to act like the purveyor of all knowledge satanist. Satanism is either a response to the rigid conformity of the christian church or the revival of an ancient religion and has no right to be renamed satanism.

So Christianity started 25 years or so after his birth once the day had gathered a few disciples. And I don't believe Jesus ever claimed to be God or the son of, rather his disciples did that for him after his death.

First, get your head out of the sand. Satanism is a real religion. So get used to it. I'm not trying to act like the "purveyor of all knowledge", but thank you for thinking of me as that. I have the same rights to believe in Satanism as you do in Christianity. Satanism did not start from Christianity. Satanism is againist not only Christianity, but all religions that punishes man of his natural instincts.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't Jesus nailed on the cross because he was claiming to be the "Messiah"? (That's what they said in a "Jesus" movie once awhile back I saw.)

Posted by the Satanic Priest, Lord Medivh

Posted by the Satanic Priest, Lord MedivhAre you a real Satanist then?

So Lord Medivh, if you create your god in your own image.....Satan is like you. SAVE ME!!!!!!!!!!! BAPTIZE ME!!!!!!!!!!!

In Satanism we believe man has created all gods in his image, but in Satanism we say to ourself, why not let that image be ourselfs. We are our own gods, and we are all equal. Even to Satan and Jesus. We all have power over the world around.

Also the Church of Satan does do Satanic Baptisms for childrens and adults.

So come on in and get baptized today in the name of Satan!

Posted by the Satanic Priest, Lord Medivh

Are you a real Satanist then?

Yes I am, I go to Black Mass every week and I carry the red Satanic card. I also have the laminated certificate for being a Satanic Priest.

I thank you for keeping your post friendly and not hateful. For I am tried of always having to defend my religion.

Posted by the Satanic Priest, Lord Medivh

Well where else did devil worship that directly opposes christianity come from?

*pushes away the rabid christians and satanists* It was supposed to be a joke! And not a very good one at that as I read through it again... c.c
actually i would argue satanists are christians. satan is a part of the christian religion, if you worship him you're just worshipping a different aspect of the christian faith. well more strictly speaking, satanists are christians if they worship satan and except the divinity of christ. if they only believe in yahweh and satan they are basically jews and i suppose if they worship satan but accept the divine inspiration of mohammed they're molsems. if you were a hindu and worshipped kali the dark earth mother, your still hindu. if you're a norse pagan but decide to pay homage to loki and the frost giants your still a norse pagan. .

Now this is amusing, watching a Satanist and a few would-be scholars making hilarious claims about Satan and Christianity. Makes me want to laugh and puke at the same time. :rolleyes:

actually i would argue satanists are christians. satan is a part of the christian religion, if you worship him you're just worshipping a different aspect of the christian faith. well more strictly speaking, satanists are christians if they worship satan and except the divinity of christ. if they only believe in yahweh and satan they are basically jews and i suppose if they worship satan but accept the divine inspiration of mohammed they're molsems. if you were a hindu and worshipped kali the dark earth mother, your still hindu. if you're a norse pagan but decide to pay homage to loki and the frost giants your still a norse pagan. .

I propose that could be part true, but I could say the same thing about christians. Also I could say that any religion group that has a Devil or Devils are Satanists.

Posted by Satanic Priest, Lord Medivh

Now this is amusing, watching a Satanist and a few would-be scholars making hilarious claims about Satan and Christianity. Makes me want to laugh and puke at the same time. :rolleyes:

Me too...

Posted by the Satanic Priest, Lord Medivh

The "Necronomicon" is a real book, I have the paperback version. Hahaha. Even though I don't believe in the book, it's a fun read. Nothing harmful in the book.

Posted by the Satanic Priest, Lord Medivh

Far as I'm aware, the Necronomicon is a fictional tome from the creative minds of H.P. Lovecraft, and those paperback prints are if anything cute props for the amusement of fans.

Far as I'm aware, the Necronomicon is a fictional tome from the creative minds of H.P. Lovecraft, and those paperback prints are if anything cute props for the amusement of fans.
i have a genuine cthulu tentacle clipping, they say if you submerge it in a vat of lukewarm salt water and pigs blood it'll grow into a little teeny elder god, but i haven't tried yet. an immortal; pet is quite a commitment, i'd have to find someone to will it too when i get old. plus i hear if you feed it too much it will grow rapidly to an unmanageble size, and my cats are all on the chubby side so...