NationStates Jolt Archive

Firearm? Polearm? Sword? Chainsaw? Flamethrower?

Yes, you know that if you had the chance to "kill" some undead creatures, you would, even if you have misgivings about sending the living to their Valhalla.

So, what weapon would you pick for the undead apocalypse?

A ruger mini 14, a couple of 9mm. pistols, and a nice hatchet with a fairly long handle. Light enough to be used one handed, long enough to chop through a skull while staying out of the zombie's reach.

M1A2 Abrams Tank, with NBC filters, and lot's of Ammo!

Beyond that, a Belgian p90 SMG wouldn't hurt to have either.

Lawnmower.

A sword (and the ability to use it in an efficient, yet aesthetically stunning way!)

A polearm and a falchion as backup. Because i will never run out of ammo.

Lawnmower.

A big Peter plow (one of those truck snow blowers) that blows the chunks back into a wood chipper mounted on the back of the truck and exhausts the pulp out the back.

I will select the nail embedded Bat of Righteousness with guided crotch-seeking technology.

Guns run out of ammo too much.

A lightsabre! That way you can cleave and cleave and they'd never get near.

No.... for a zombie apocalypse... a shotgun with a lot of ammo. I'd probably not survive for long given the clip capacity, but it'd be more entertaining. Plus there wouldn't be much of my brain left, so little chance of me coming back. But then, would I not want to come back, necessarily?

I'll have to think on that. *thinks on fleshy revenge*

No.... for a zombie apocalypse... a shotgun with a lot of ammo. I'd probably not survive for long given the clip capacity, but it'd be more entertaining. Plus there wouldn't be much of my brain left, so little chance of me coming back. But then, would I not want to come back, necessarily?

Why not use a fully auto one with a standard box clip? or if its movie/whatever weapon you want time :D use a fully automatic belt-fed double barralled shotgun....mmmmmmmmm zombie destruction of the messy kind

*wanders off to watch Shaun of the Dead* :D

Half Life's crow bar.

I'm thinking I'll just hop in my tank, and drive into the hills, occassionally stopping to fill up the tank with diesel every so often. I'd also clean out the Kwik-e-Marts of foodstuff, so as to facilitate my survival!

Half Life's crow bar.


See, that's got style, but it really isn't all that handy in a fight. Even those bloody headcrabs take more than one hit to kill. Maybe a polearm with the crowbar glued onto the end or something. That might work.

So, what weapon would you pick for the undead apocalypse?
a badass sword :)
a LOTR replica one :headbang:

I've already told people - come the undead apocalypse, cut off your hand, attach a chainsaw to the bloody stump, and carry a sawn-off with a bandolier of shotgun shells and a bandolier of shotgun-loading grenade rounds. I'd like to see the slow-shuffling masses that can deal with me!


Well, that or a cricket bat and an M16/M203 combo.

A leafblower

A leafblower
Sod that, go for the atomic toaster :p

A horde of my own zombies, of course.

Any snipe rifle with an inbuilt scope and silencer - I do not mind at all. Just as long as I can weld on a grenade launcher underneath, and have a decent stock of grenades and WP and caesium-tipped rounds. Long range explodey. :D
Oh... and my horde of vampiric progeny.

"You will all go directly to your respective valhallas...
Go directly, do not pass go, do not collect $200."

an M14 rifle, a FiveSeven and a M79 blooper-gun.

swords! Gladiator style ;)

A polearm and a falchion as backup. Because i will never run out of ammo.
Yeah just strength.
Go the Mace

Edit
No No NO
Automatic Crossbow with Explosive Bolts/rounds

Hmm. A biohazard suit and lots of concentrated sulfuric acid.

Samurai sword

a bigass sledgehammer.

according to a dream a freind of mine had, i would fight the undead with twin pistols.

my mother in law (if i had one)

Rep's sword of DEAT would be nice

Guns run out of ammo too much.

A lightsabre! That way you can cleave and cleave and they'd never get near.

No.... for a zombie apocalypse... a shotgun with a lot of ammo. I'd probably not survive for long given the clip capacity, but it'd be more entertaining. Plus there wouldn't be much of my brain left, so little chance of me coming back. But then, would I not want to come back, necessarily?

I'll have to think on that. *thinks on fleshy revenge*
*entering geek mode* actually lightsabers run uta batteries when used on matter :P

anything I can get my hands on :sniper: :mp5: :gundge: :headbang:

all i need is my trusty HL2 crow bar and pump-action :D
ohohoh one more thing as "backup" i would take a "daishi" is any of you knows what im talking about :D

I choose the Deadly Titanium Spork! Once I kill the undead, I can eat their brains...

You mean it isn't? Then what the hell have I been blowtorching?

You mean it isn't? Then what the hell have I been blowtorching?

People from Birmingham. Don't worry. No-one can tell the difference.

Heh i'm suprised no one brought up the gravity gun from half-life 2. Just need to mod it so it can pick up and launch cars. (goes off to make a gravity gun out of 2 cans and a roll of ducktape)

bah i only didnt mention the grav gun cuz even tho its really cool noting can beat teh cr0w8@r of d00m :p *swings crow bar in pattern of hl*

I would hit the zombies with Luxembourg. I figure it is small enough to be wielded in one hand while the other hand would be be holding a 12 gauge shotgun welded on to a pitchfork which would serve as a bayonet.

Mag-Lite flashlight and a Vomit Stick.


*see Keruvalia for details

It would have to be a steel spiked cowbell attached to a weathered but still very useable bull rope for excellent swinging malee action when outnumbered. With this weapon I would get to use amazingly corny one liners, like "You needed more cowbell", "Saved by the Bell", or "Gotta keep their heads ringin' ", after I dispatched hordes of undead. The apocalypse could not get any better!

- A .40 caliber handgun with hollowpoints and a silencer. Because shit happens when zombies hear gunshots.

- A flamethrower for when there's no way around the zombies. Because zombies either fear fire or go right into it.

Lawnmower with shoulder strap.

I'm going to be nice and sensible and pick a trusty semi-automatic rifle. On a stick. With chainsaws and spiky bits. With an attached flamethrower. And a grenade launcher. And an attack dog launcher. And a ray-gun. And also pepper spray. And a sword on the other end. With wings.
Fear me, zombies, for I am more unfeasable than you!

:mp5:

What if the zombies caught on fire then grabbed you?


I'll take a suit of power armor and the super sledge from Fallout 2.

I wouldn't take any weapons.
Just some extremley tough armor that the zombies can't get through.
Then I can just pick up zombie limbs and use them as weapons. :)


Meh. If that doesn't work, I'll take a mini-gun with lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of ammo.
A single mini-gun can destroy an entire suburb of 40,000 people in one night.
Let's see how undead freaks mess with the modern age! ;)

What if the zombies caught on fire then grabbed you?


I'll take a suit of power armor and the super sledge from Fallout 2.
Beyond that, what happens if the zombies are like the ones in Return to Castle Wolfenstein, and when they catch on fire they spew fire right back!

Seriously guys, my atomic toaster with homing baguettes would whoop the ass off of all your weapons. Especially with pumpernickle mortars to go with the baguettes

double shotgun, loads of ammo.

Sounds actually like fun. When's the apocalypse again?

double shotgun, loads of ammo.

Sounds actually like fun. When's the apocalypse again?
My house, a week on thursday. Oh, BTW, it's BYO hammer and nails - for when we have to nail up the windows against the zombie horde I've been cultivating in my underground laboratory.

So, there are no necrophiliacs on this forum who would use their own member as a weapon?

No "giving head to the dead"?

A box of vinyl records like in Shaun of the Dead.

:thumbup:

Seriously guys, my atomic toaster with homing baguettes would whoop the ass off of all your weapons. Especially with pumpernickle mortars to go with the baguettes

Until you realize that bakeries have fallen into shambles in the zombie epidemic.

Here, on another forum, are pics of the zombie crushing vehicles I'd like to have:

http://www.plowsite.com/showthread.php?p=201098#post201098

Nothing gruesome in the pics...

A Typhoon-class SSBN with full armament!

Or maybe a Minigun and a HEV suit :mp5:

A pool cue.

all right, all y'all need to read the Zombie Survival Guide, by Max Barry. If you had, you would know all about zombie avoidance, and extermination, skill and supplies. Myself, I would use a m-14 sopmod, a .22 rimfire pistol, or small crossbow, katana, and maybe have a machete lying around, just in case. BUt zombie hunting is no game, people, you need to be organized andserious, no tto mention stealthy, to stay alive. doubly so to make a dent in the horsdes of undead.

Yep. That book is good. Although Max Barry is the author of Jennifer Government and the evil overlord of Nationstates. Max Brooks is the guy who wrote the Zombie Survival Guide.

On the other hand, just give me the US nuke launch codes :D

No weapon, I would cower in fear of the on coming masses.

Axe...I am old school

Melee: Lightsabre.
Ranged: Mauser Karabiner 98k.

Strap a couple of Nuclear Warheads to my forehead, I would smack the f*ckers into Oblivion :headbang:

1 Hand+Half Sword.
1 Bowie knife, 18".
1 Survival knife, 6".
1 Pistol crossbow, with homemade explosive tipped darts.

Thats the stuff in my bedroom that hasn't been reserved by my mates - someone else bagsied my katana and cavalry saber. However, I called dibbs the minute we crack the police armory and get our hands on breaching shotguns. Solid slugs are gonna make a mess of zombie skull and probably remove limbs as well! Our objective is to try and create Zug Zug the Pet Torso.

1 Hand+Half Sword.
1 Bowie knife, 18".
1 Survival knife, 6".
1 Pistol crossbow, with homemade explosive tipped darts.

Thats the stuff in my bedroom that hasn't been reserved by my mates - someone else bagsied my katana and cavalry saber. However, I called dibbs the minute we crack the police armory and get our hands on breaching shotguns. Solid slugs are gonna make a mess of zombie skull and probably remove limbs as well! Our objective is to try and create Zug Zug the Pet Torso.
What the hell are knives going to do against a zombie?

a gundam
or A.G.W.S.
or gear
or mech
or any other kind of giant robot i really dont care which

a four foot titaniam Crowbar

Crow bar

My mighty fork o' justice +3.

A cd player and the newest J-Lo single

A cd player and the newest J-Lo single
You're only supposed to kill the bloody zombies :p

maybe they'll think twice before trying the same shit again :)

chain-sledge

Just imagine a huge chainsaw but instead of saw-teeth it has sledge hammer heads.

hmm, a stack of throwing knives with a portable bombard-mortar and my bow. sounds good too me, just need to remember not to forget the ammo

I would definately have to go with a shotgun/katana combo. Blast walls of zombies down and then slice up those remaining.

i've always dreamt as a child that I would have to save the world from zombies using an automatic shotgun. :D

I would definately have to go with a shotgun/katana combo. Blast walls of zombies down and then slice up those remaining.

i've always dreamt as a child that I would have to save the world from zombies using an automatic shotgun. :D
USAS-12 on zombie hordes, with an arsenal just within reach.

*shudders in delight*

Heinleinian Power Armor w/ additional flame-throwers :D

Come on people, you're not thinking Undead Apocalypse!

Personally, I'll take the Super Soaker squirt gun filled with holy water. Either that or a hot air balloon (zombies can't fly, can they?) and a Barrett m82a1 .50 cal.

Come on people, you're not thinking Undead Apocalypse!

Personally, I'll take the Super Soaker squirt gun filled with holy water. Either that or a hot air balloon (zombies can't fly, can they?) and a Barrett m82a1 .50 cal.
You are forgetting the paramount law a zombie holocaust - anything that can go wrong will go wrong. A bird would fly into your balloon and pop it with mysterious ease, or zombie birds would peck your face off, or something

This: http://www.valiantco.com/philippines/Kampilan.JPG

This: http://www.valiantco.com/philippines/Kampilan.JPG
That's a nice one. Do you own it or is it just a picture from the net? Are you a Kali guy?

This: http://www.valiantco.com/philippines/Kampilan.JPG

*drools*

ohohoh one more thing as "backup" i would take a "daishi" is any of you knows what im talking about :D
One of the shorter katanas I assume, given that a daito is the longest one I know of.

A horde of Scrotum-Seeking Weasels, of course. From the Ann Coulter Finishing School For Refined Scrotum-Seeking Weasels.

http://www.mnh.si.edu/exhibits/mammals/Weasel.gif

A Pistol, Pistol Ammo, Survival Knife, Mixed Herb and an Old Key.

Ol' Skool.

:p

Eh? None of you you primitive screwheads mentioned the almighty twelve gauge double-barreled Remington "boomstick"!*

(Shop Smart. Shop S-mart.)
(BTW, make note: I'm all out of gum!)

(*Yeah lots of shotguns, but nio "boomstick"!)

Typical weapons generally don't work very well against zombies...and the whole blessing the weapons with holy water crap doesn't work very well at all unless you're an EXTREMELY devout Catholic (<--- is not), and the undead you're facing a) was a Catholic, and b) believed/s in that crap. So I'd have to say go with a flame thrower...or maybe a shatterable vial of some liquid that bursts into flames upon contact with oxygen.

A rider lawnmower with the safety front thingy removed. Varooooooom!

Eh? None of you you primitive screwheads mentioned the almighty twelve gauge double-barreled Remington "boomstick"!*

(Shop Smart. Shop S-mart.)
(BTW, make note: I'm all out of gum!)

(*Yeah lots of shotguns, but nio "boomstick"!)
*applauds*
I second that.

A battleship. Zombies can't swim, right?

Firearm? Polearm? Sword? Chainsaw? Flamethrower?

Yes, you know that if you had the chance to "kill" some undead creatures, you would, even if you have misgivings about sending the living to their Valhalla.

So, what weapon would you pick for the undead apocalypse?

Judging from RPG's maces are best, but in Quake rocket launchers were the thing to use. Of course if anything at all is allowed, I pick magical powers.

Of course if anything at all is allowed, I pick magical powers.
Hee. Pyrokinetics would be rather nice...
When you can immolate a zombie through willpower alone at long range, I duobt you'd have to worry much aboi=ut them...

UNless you were sleeping.

shotgun

Assuming thast these are zombies that need the brain destroyed?
Probably a pool cue or a long stick. Why?
Cause I ain't gonna be able to kill them with a melee weapon. I just have no training, with either melee weapons or firearms, I'd be screwed. I'd just knock 'em til I get to a safe spot. Also assuming these are the five year Max Brooks zombies, I'd probably then try to get a a good couple of rocks tied to a rope, and a roof.
Simple.

Mecha Jesus.

I'm something of a Star Wars nerd so I'd have to choose a lightsaber. But without that I'd pick a sword.

Yep. That book is good. Although Max Barry is the author of Jennifer Government and the evil overlord of Nationstates. Max Brooks is the guy who wrote the Zombie Survival Guide.
yeah
i didn't ahve the book on hand. for a while, until i found my copy, i was really hoping that the two were one and the same

What is so bad about being undead? Being Undead has many benefits that you may not be aware of.


Undeath unites people better than any political system ever could
Being Undead means not having to worry the necessities of life like clean air and water
Undead people, if their consciousness remains, have the benefit of sharing their wisdom with future generations
Undead people, once their stomachs rot away, don't have to worry about buying food.
The Undead can be of great value in a post-apocalyptic wasteland taking tasks that are unfit for living mortals.


The Undead Rock! Sign up at your local Undead Recruitment Station today!

See, that's got style, but it really isn't all that handy in a fight. Even those bloody headcrabs take more than one hit to kill. Maybe a polearm with the crowbar glued onto the end or something. That might work.

The upgraded gravity gun (Haven't checked, sorry if this has already been posted). Endless fun.

Bow and arrow, one of those house sized trucks used to haul rock in open pit mining, a mini-gun and a light saber. :-D\

edit: and a RPG launcher with endless ammo!! :)

feminine charm

a scalpel
and then a blender.

yeah, all y'al REALLY need to read the zombie survival guide. I can't stress enough that a shotgun is not the best weapon. It's only good up close. Think abou that. How close do you really want to be to a zombie? I mean, stench of rotting flesh and guttural moaning aside, they want to feast on your meat. Get a semi-auto rifle, preferably a carbine. Mini-14 is a good choice. And as satisfying as it might be to put a sombie in a blender, it would be terribly dificult, and lest ye forget, they feel no pain. only headshots will kill them.

I'd rather just go ahead and use nuclear weapons. :D (really, I would! They're dead anyway, why not just vaporize them? :D )

What is so bad about being undead? Being Undead has many benefits that you may not be aware of.


Undeath unites people better than any political system ever could
Being Undead means not having to worry the necessities of life like clean air and water
Undead people, if their consciousness remains, have the benefit of sharing their wisdom with future generations
Undead people, once their stomachs rot away, don't have to worry about buying food.
The Undead can be of great value in a post-apocalyptic wasteland taking tasks that are unfit for living mortals.


The Undead Rock! Sign up at your local Undead Recruitment Station today!

The trick I would imagine is in getting bitten by a zombie but not eaten by one. You would just want the zombie to take a little nibble so you could become a fully intact undead killing machine. You wouldn't want a whole horde of hungry zombies to feast on you and chewing off all your limbs or you would just end up a squirmy undead torso which wouldn't be any fun at all...

beans of doom, then fart'em all to hell

All you people suggesting fire have it all wrong. You see, zombies do not die instantly in fire. As they feel no pain, they may continue moving for several minutes or even several hours until they have fully burned away.

What is worse, a zombie hoard coming towards you, or a flaming zombie hoard coming towards you?

The only thing you need to do is destroy the brain. Shotguns are good for close range work, however the ammo is bulky. The best firearms for zombie work are carbines, pistol caliber rifles traditionally, but more recently, shortened versions of full sized rifles. The M1 carbine is a nice, mid-ranged, simple weapon with plentful, easy to carry ammo. Any of the variety of M4 would work nicely, as would the Ruger Mini-14. You don't need a .50 caliber and go around blwoing up zombie heads. Avoid full auto weapons as well aimed single-shots will be many times more effective than rock n' roll. Remember: only the brain must be destroyed. Severing limbs just makes a less effective zombie, but a deadly one nonetheless.

Any weapon you choose should be suppressed, or you should have a quiet option, such as a small hand crossbow. Noise attracts more zombies! You don't want to finish putting down a ghoul just to turn around and have to put down 15 more!

Common sense is the key to surviving the undead apocalypse.

Any weapon you choose should be suppressed, or you should have a quiet option, such as a small hand crossbow. Noise attracts more zombies! You don't want to finish putting down a ghoul just to around and have to put down 15 more!
:eek:
I can't believe I forgot that!

*mutters about her copy of The Zombie Survival Guide getting stolen*

All you people suggesting fire have it all wrong. You see, zombies do not die instantly in fire. As they feel no pain, they may continue moving for several minutes or even several hours until they have fully burned away.

What is worse, a zombie hoard coming towards you, or a flaming zombie hoard coming towards you?

The only thing you need to do is destroy the brain. Shotguns are good for close range work, however the ammo is bulky. The best firearms for zombie work are carbines, pistol caliber rifles traditionally, but more recently, shortened versions of full sized rifles. The M1 carbine is a nice, mid-ranged, simple weapon with plentful, easy to carry ammo. Any of the variety of M4 would work nicely, as would the Ruger Mini-14. You don't need a .50 caliber and go around blwoing up zombie heads. Avoid full auto weapons as well aimed single-shots will be many times more effective than rock n' roll. Remember: only the brain must be destroyed. Severing limbs just makes a less effective zombie, but a deadly one nonetheless.

Any weapon you choose should be suppressed, or you should have a quiet option, such as a small hand crossbow. Noise attracts more zombies! You don't want to finish putting down a ghoul just to around and have to put down 15 more!

Common sense is the key to surviving the undead apocalypse.
So nukes wouldn't work?

So nukes wouldn't work?
Well, I would bet nuking a zombie would destroy the brain, so yes they would work.

Well, I would bet nuking a zombie would destroy the brain, so yes they would work.
Great!

What about radiation, what affect would the radiation have on them?

Nukes would only be necessary in a Class 4 infestation, where the actual survival of the human race was in question. Even then, it would leave the planet inhabitable, thus not really improving the situation. A nuke in a class 3 infestation, i.e. city-scale would not gaurantee the destruction of every zombie, and as they are immune to radiation, could cause a widespread Radioactive Zombie infestation, which is a whole new can of worms. A containment plan, combined with coordinated clean/sweep teams is the best way to wipe out infestations.

Great!

What about radiation, what affect would the radiation have on them?
I doubt it would do a whole lot, really. Then again, I'm not sure.

Perhaps someone knows more?

EDIT:
I was a bit late on the posting, as Karma already explained about it all.

Read my last post.

Nukes would only be necessary in a Class 4 infestation, where the actual survival of the human race was in question. Even then, it would leave the planet inhabitable, thus not really improving the situation. A nuke in a class 3 infestation, i.e. city-scale would not gaurantee the destruction of every zombie, and as they are immune to radiation, could cause a widespread Radioactive Zombie infestation, which is a whole new can of worms. A containment plan, combined with coordinated clean/sweep teams is the best way to wipe out infestations.
What's the highest "class" of infestation?

And the planet would be UN-inhabitable.

Read my last post.
I clicked reply before yours was there, and didn't see it.
Oops.

And the planet would be UN-inhabitable.
That's not fair, there are a lot of countries not in the UN!

Class 4 is the highest, and yes, you are correct, un-inhabitable. Damn 1am and brain full of astrodynamics.

A class-4 infestation threatens the very survival of the human race, planetwide..

That's not fair, there are a lot of countries not in the UN!
oops. I meant to say "uninhabitable", or "lifeless".

M240G, and as much 7.62x51mm as I can carry in a backpack.

Nukes would only be necessary in a Class 4 infestation, where the actual survival of the human race was in question. Even then, it would leave the planet inhabitable, thus not really improving the situation. A nuke in a class 3 infestation, i.e. city-scale would not gaurantee the destruction of every zombie, and as they are immune to radiation, could cause a widespread Radioactive Zombie infestation, which is a whole new can of worms. A containment plan, combined with coordinated clean/sweep teams is the best way to wipe out infestations.
I don't see how things could ever get to that point. I figure as long as a few soldiers could survive long enough to get in their tanks, they could wipe out any zombie horde. I mean seriously how is a zombie going to stop a tank? Chew through the armor?

A redneck lynch mob stopped the zombie invasion in Night of the L.D. so I think a zombie attack would be about as dangerous as a gopher hunt as long as you had enough ammo, and could run faster than a decaying old worm eaten grandma.

Karma knows too much about zombies...
I wonder...

:eek:

THE NS MODSQUAD ARE MEMBERS OF THE LIVING DEAD!!!
I knew it all along!!

Is it tricky to type with decaying hands?

Tanks run out of ammo and fuel. People eventually run out of supplies as the interstate and international transport system breaks down. Think about it. How many products are made within walking or driving distance of your home? Do you know how to make clean drinking water when the power goes out and generators run out of fuel? With the undead, you are fighting a battle of time. They have plenty of it, you don't.

And no, the new MS Ergonomic Keyboard for the Life-Challenged keeps me in tip-top typing shape.

And no, the new MS Ergonomic Keyboard for the Life-Challenged keeps me in tip-top typing shape.
So Microsoft's in on it too.
I was wondering, some of their employees shamble a bit and have odd stares...
:D

While I agree that the high powered rifle is probably your best bet in the long run, I'd still prefer to have a good old shotgun handy...

Aiming takes time... Time you might not have in every situation... Not to mention that aiming takes skill, which very few people (myself included) have...lol

I mean, say you hear a noise to your left, and you spin just in time to see a zombie or two hurtling at you from the top of that overturned, burned-out van? Do you think in the limited time you've got to react that you could get your rifle up, get them in your sights, and pick them off with a perfectly-aimed headshot?

Nope, not a chance... You're going to need the ability to simply raise the gun, point it in their general direction, and lay out a spray of lead that will cover for your hasty "aim"...

Speed will be key in many, many instances... You're not going to have the luxury of picking out a nice, secure camping spot to snipe from, and taking them out from afar... You're eventually going to wind up surrounded, or ambushed, and you'll need a gun that can handle that...

Yes, avoiding close range combat is very much preferable, but it is a near impossiblity...

I live not too far away from a oil refinery, far but not too far. I'm thinking flaming oil moat. And we can keep whatever vehicles we scavenge running on the fuel in the refinery, eventually replacing the fuel with tires and living underground becuase we hadn't thought the whole 'living next to a oil/tire fire' thing all the way through....

People from Birmingham. Don't worry. No-one can tell the difference.

Bloody brummies! Wondered why they were only biting me in the ass!

Ruger 10/22, Rossi .38spl, a crowbar, and a backpack filled with the necessities(as described by Max Brooks).

Depends what kind of undead. In some instances a fire hase a really good rate of kill but with the more bone composed variedty you cant beat blunt trauma. however some kind of blessed weapon could be very useful (the ole holy water loaded super soaker comes to mind.) so the weapon is definately gunna be based on the type of undead. Of course I suppose high explosives are Kinda the catch all weapon of choice.

Nukes would only be necessary in a Class 4 infestation, where the actual survival of the human race was in question. Even then, it would leave the planet inhabitable, thus not really improving the situation. A nuke in a class 3 infestation, i.e. city-scale would not gaurantee the destruction of every zombie, and as they are immune to radiation, could cause a widespread Radioactive Zombie infestation, which is a whole new can of worms. A containment plan, combined with coordinated clean/sweep teams is the best way to wipe out infestations.

What about neutron bombs... HIGH TISSUE DAMAGE, LITTLE STRUCTUARAL DAMAGE, NO AFTER EFFECTS (nukes without the hangover) And you would have to nuke the crap out of everywhere to render an uninhabitable world so actualy i would thin that nukes are ideal for smaller outbreaks city sized and such. Lingering radiation is wasted bomb material modern weapons are far more effeicient so this would be far less than back in the hiroshima days.

+5 holy towel of undead smiting doom

Towels are the most usefull object in the universe :D

A combine harvester strapped to a school bus with a cowcatcher on the front. I'll call it the Dead Kibbler.

Lets be realistic here... The following are all made up of items I have access to in my own home.

Medium-range combat
Top if the range cricket bat. May seem a little 'Shaun of the dead', but I have reasons.
for medium-range combat a cricket bat with a 7 inch nail hammered firmly in the lower end for maximum neural-tissue damage.

Close-range?
Meat cleaver. kept sharp it cuts through bone and will oblitorate any grey-matter it comes into contact with.

Long-range...
an incendry device. As I have possibly the worst bow-skill in britain then it would have to be a form of Molatov.

A lightsaber (well an undead apoclypse is unrealistic enough, so I think I'm allowed a Science fiction weapon)

A lightsaber (well an undead apoclypse is unrealistic enough, so I think I'm allowed a Science fiction weapon)
A heck of a lot more effective than some stupid baseball bat or meat cleaver!

You people really have to learn some basic chemistry.

Caesium-tipped bullets are the ammo of choice. Caesium explodes on contact with water - which means the instant you hit a zombie with one, they leave a massive crater. I would suggest using a silenced weapon, but if you really have to use a standard gun, you've got a small advantage, because you'll confuse them. They'll hear a distant bang, followed by a very close bang - they won't know what to go after.

You people really have to learn some basic chemistry.

Caesium-tipped bullets are the ammo of choice. Caesium explodes on contact with water - which means the instant you hit a zombie with one, they leave a massive crater. I would suggest using a silenced weapon, but if you really have to use a standard gun, you've got a small advantage, because you'll confuse them. They'll hear a distant bang, followed by a very close bang - they won't know what to go after.

In theory it's a good idea, but caesium tipped bullets aren't exactly in abundant supply.


I would rather use everday items, myself. "Hey, zombie!" *WHAM* "try eating people with a TV stuck over your head."

A grand piano

A level 26 cleric who can "turn undead"

and some duct tape

I would use the "Titanic" soundtrack. That is a sure fire way to stop any creature (living, dead, or undead) in its tracks.

I would use the "Titanic" soundtrack. That is a sure fire way to stop any creature (living, dead, or undead) in its tracks.
:eek: thats just evil mate.

gravity gun :sniper:

I would use the "Titanic" soundtrack. That is a sure fire way to stop any creature (living, dead, or undead) in its tracks.

I think the whole soundtrack is a little inhumane, even for the non human. Can't you just use "My Heart will go on". An attack of the whole soundtrack is bound to cause way to much collatoral damage

I'll call up my friend Goku from Dragon Ball Z.
He's got a bit energy to throw around.

I would ride into battle on my Sky Whale and carry a giant muffin as a weapon.

Hmm....
Main Firearm: 8 guage shotgun (only ever saw one) with a modified 15 round box magazine.

Sidearm: Desert Eagle .50 cal. pistol with a 14 round clip.

Ironwood 5ft staff.

Bastard Sword

2 molecularly sharpened combat knives. (possible, but 1 slice and they need to be prefessionally resharpened, but it can cut things on a molecular (but not splitting atoms) level)

WP grenades, HE greneades, assorted demo charges.

Need to add sodium tipped bullets, same effect as cesium, without the unsightly radiation.

But if i had to fend off a zombe infestation with my own houshold items. hmmm...

Blunt foce trauma, one fo two things, billy club, or the poker for the fireplace.

Slashing, combat knives in the case on top of my dresser.

Assorted aerosol cans and lighters.

i DO have that .50 cal pistol, so that wouldn;t be a problem.

I DO have a good bit of explosive material so that isn;t a problem, i can make some napalm cluster bombs in a pinch. Just some styrofoam, gasoline, 2 m80s and tennis balls...

The rail gun that Arnold uses in Terminator II and Jesse Ventura had in Predator. Obviously with a shit load of ammo. Cut them into mince. Won't be attacking me after a blast from that.
Actually, the weapons that Predator has would probably be better. But not as bloody, which is a minus. Maybe a couple of Alien creatures would be good.
Also a suit of Armour would be ideal in case any do get past the bullets. One wired up to shoot several hundred thousand volts into anyone or anything touching it (from outside of course).

my monkey army, equipped with the patented ACME Undead Powder, like ant powder but bigger pellets. me sitting pretty in my ivory tower watching the ensuing chaos.

Muhahahha

a jackhammer

In theory it's a good idea, but caesium tipped bullets aren't exactly in abundant supply.
Maybe not where you are... :D
Would you like some? My undead-apocalypse-vampire-progeny are always willing to go where I send them.

You people really have to learn some basic chemistry.

Caesium-tipped bullets are the ammo of choice. Caesium explodes on contact with water - which means the instant you hit a zombie with one, they leave a massive crater. I would suggest using a silenced weapon, but if you really have to use a standard gun, you've got a small advantage, because you'll confuse them. They'll hear a distant bang, followed by a very close bang - they won't know what to go after.

I reckon the Caesium would ignite as the the bullet went through the air; either from friction or with the water droplets in the air. And as Caesium (like all alkali metals) is stored in oil, which evaporates, it makes storage a bummer. You might find that the Caesium tipped bullets in your magazine have just ignited...

As for the suggestion of the Neutron bomb, does that not simply work as radiation does? Which, we have decided, would have no effect on zombies?

Just a thought...

Sorry, I should have explained them better.

A "caesium-tipped" bullet is actually a hollow bullet, with a vacuum-sealed front chamber, and a caesium-filled back chamber. On impact, the divide breaks, sucking the caesium forward, and out the front of the bullet - through the target.

Makes a nice big explosion through their chest.

If you want real fun, you could try francium, but you've got 22 minutes before half your francium's gone.... damn radioactive elements.

Maybe not where you are... :D
Would you like some? My undead-apocalypse-vampire-progeny are always willing to go where I send them.

Nah, I've got a cool bokken on my mantelpiece which I would probably use. It would probably be ineffective, but it sure would be fun to whack zombies around the head with it before being mobbed by hordes of them.

Sorry, I should have explained them better.

A "caesium-tipped" bullet is actually a hollow bullet, with a vacuum-sealed front chamber, and a caesium-filled back chamber. On impact, the divide breaks, sucking the caesium forward, through the target.

Oooh. Interesting. Assumes that the zombies haven't dried out yet... :-)

What do you do if the Caesium splits up too much? Then you'll simply have a small fire, which isn't very useful.

Nah, I've got a cool bokken on my mantelpiece which I would probably use. It would probably be ineffective, but it sure would be fun to whack zombies around the head with it before being mobbed by hordes of them.
I know exactly what you mean - I've got one at the end of my bed.
Might not be a katana, but their skulls will still shatter under one. :D

Oooh. Interesting. Assumes that the zombies haven't dried out yet... :-)

What do you do if the Caesium splits up too much? Then you'll simply have a small fire, which isn't very useful.
A dry zombie's like chapped lips - they start to crack and break apart with movement.

The caesium shouldn't break up too much - it's all focused through the head of the bullet, meaning it'll leave a great big hole in your target's torso, and possibly doing damage to the zombie behind... and the one behind that. :D

Half Life's crow bar.


XM-8 all teh way baby!

feminine charm

a scalpel
and then a blender.



The only thing you need to do is destroy the brain. . Remember: only the brain must be destroyed. Severing limbs just makes a less effective zombie, but a deadly one nonetheless.

.
ha. then i got it dead on. no zombie can resist the offer of a good female something or other.nevermind the power of an offered backrub for those grave-sore muscles. i get them close, i slice open the skull from the back, toss the brain in the blender, and i have triumphed. who knew the over coming of the zombie war could be won with bordello tactics. plus, i already have plenty of zombie friends- i embalmed thousands of them before their death :D

A dry zombie's like chapped lips - they start to crack and break apart with movement.

The caesium shouldn't break up too much - it's all focused through the head of the bullet, meaning it'll leave a great big hole in your target's torso, and possibly doing damage to the zombie behind... and the one behind that. :D

I want me some of them!

But I've decided that an equivalent Sodium bullet would be useless, as (from what I know) Sodium merely goes on fire on contact with water. Thus, it's an elaborate flame-thrower type thing. Which we don't want.

But Caesium...

Sodium's for automatic weapons, caesium's for sniping, francium's for sniping from the other side of the city. ;)

Well, when there's an undead apocalypse, since I'll be the vampire lord of canberra, I'll send you some of my spawn with a crate of them.

I'd just use my phosphorous grenades. Doesn't everybody have a set by law? :D

Sodium's for automatic weapons, caesium's for sniping, francium's for sniping from the other side of the city. ;)

Well, when there's an undead apocalypse, since I'll be the vampire lord of canberra, I'll send you some of my spawn with a crate of them.
francium hasn't been isolated above the tens of atoms. Fairly useless bullets.

francium hasn't been isolated above the tens of atoms. Fairly useless bullets.

Yeah, it would just break down into other metals (assuming you managed to get enough of it from the start. It's half-life is miniscule, I believe). Leaving you with a nice, radioactive gun. And radioactive bullets, of course, but they're not going to do much to a zombie.

Forget about weapons and vehicles that you'd have to steal. I'd think something more feasible like an elephant with armor made from random household objects (e.g. toaster, lampshades, couch). Forget about zombies climbing up when it has aluminum siding!

The only downside would be having to avoid pet-stores and the occasional stop at the super markets. Other than that, an elephant is a zombie and automobile stomping machine, courtesy of mother nature...or your local zoo.

A grand piano

A level 26 cleric who can "turn undead"

and some duct tape
Unstoppable.

Forget about weapons and vehicles that you'd have to steal. I'd think something more feasible like an elephant with armor made from random household objects (e.g. toaster, lampshades, couch). Forget about zombies climbing up when it has aluminum siding!

The only downside would be having to avoid pet-stores and the occasional stop at the super markets. Other than that, an elephant is a zombie and automobile stomping machine, courtesy of mother nature...or your local zoo.
Also, after you have saved the world from zombie apocalypse, the animal rights activists would beat you to death with placards. Personally, I'm gonna use this here fuel-air bomb (http://armor.kiev.ua/army/hist/obomvzryv-1.jpg), the most powerful non-nuclear/biological weapon. Bitchin.

Also, after you have saved the world from zombie apocalypse, the animal rights activists would beat you to death with placards. Personally, I'm gonna use this here fuel-air bomb (http://armor.kiev.ua/army/hist/obomvzryv-1.jpg), the most powerful non-nuclear/biological weapon. Bitchin.
Once again, this is only a viable option in a class four. And even then, you will need allies. WHo knows if that fomr sillouetted in that window is just another of the legions of the undead, or if he is a potential member of your zombie hunting squad. Collateral damage is ALWAYS an issue.

francium hasn't been isolated above the tens of atoms. Fairly useless bullets.
Have you seen that level of purified francium in action? Still insane.

Yeah, it would just break down into other metals (assuming you managed to get enough of it from the start. It's half-life is miniscule, I believe). Leaving you with a nice, radioactive gun. And radioactive bullets, of course, but they're not going to do much to a zombie.
As I said before, you have 22 minutes before half of it's gone. You just make certain you use that time well - it'll still do a hell of a lot more than even caesium.

Once again, this is only a viable option in a class four. And even then, you will need allies. WHo knows if that fomr sillouetted in that window is just another of the legions of the undead, or if he is a potential member of your zombie hunting squad. Collateral damage is ALWAYS an issue.

So I guess that rules out Francium, by the sound of it...

So I guess that rules out Francium, by the sound of it...
Nah, the fact that it's virtually theoretical rules it's use out. I'd like to see this reaction that Insequa tells us of. As far as I can tell, it's only ever been found in a) the aftermath of nuclear explosions as trace atoms and b) in fast breeder reactors.

the only way to ensure one's survival, IMO, is to find a barrel of acid and make yourself an acid moat, the ones that do make it across intact will be readilly swiped down by your katana or 'sploded by your firearms.

So I guess that rules out Francium, by the sound of it...
Well, you don't want to rely on a meterial that is not easily accessible anyway. Any rifle that fires the common .556 round will be a good choice. You also don't want to rely on your scrounging abilities, so stockpiling supplies is very neccessary. Hence, any substance with a low half-life will be far from preffered.

Nah, the fact that it's virtually theoretical rules it's use out. I'd like to see this reaction that Insequa tells us of. As far as I can tell, it's only ever been found in a) the aftermath of nuclear explosions as trace atoms and b) in fast breeder reactors.
Which is why you keep a breeder reactor in your anti-zombie fortress. Apart from the fact that it makes for a good powersource, and you can actually experiment to see if radiation does affect zombies of course.

mmm... zombie cancer.

Which is why you keep a breeder reactor in your anti-zombie fortress.
They don't produce very much of it in the fast breeder reactors either. Trace atoms.

Yeah, you'd be waiting a while...

Yeah, you'd be waiting a while...
Personally, I'd make some Hydrofluoric acid (I think that's the name). It can burn flesh and bone in under a minute, if highly concentrated.

Yes, hydroflouric is fun... leaches into your bones doesn't it? Makes it a b**** to get out.

Yes, hydroflouric is fun... leaches into your bones doesn't it? Makes it a b**** to get out.
I would say something violent, but 'Bedshaped' just came on my player. It is impossible to be pissed during the first bi....oh, wait, the anger bit just kicked in..

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRARARRARAARRARRARAHGAGHGAHGAHGH!!!! WGGWHH!"!YY&&& *headbutts wall* SZMDHHWHW!!QOOO!

Personally, I'd make some Hydrofluoric acid (I think that's the name). It can burn flesh and bone in under a minute, if highly concentrated.
you should see what a mess it makes on the carpet! :D

I would say something violent, but 'Bedshaped' just came on my player. It is impossible to be pissed during the first bi....oh, wait, the anger bit just kicked in..

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRARARRARAARRARRARAHGAGHGAHGAHGH!!!! WGGWHH!"!YY&&& *headbutts wall* SZMDHHWHW!!QOOO!
What is this "Bedshaped" of which you speak?

.308 bolt-action rifle for long-range shots

Sawed-off 12-guage shotgun, Colt Python .357 Mag and a .45 ACP for close-quarter fighting

and a flamethrower

you should see what a mess it makes on the carpet! :D
not to mention what it does to cats. I miss bob. :(

What is this "Bedshaped" of which you speak?
It's Keane. that was part of a joke. One of my mates suggested that this trio of singer, drummer and pianist could get really angry at times. The lyrcs do - they don't (singer has kinda soft boys choir approach)

not to mention what it does to cats. I miss bob. :(
He tasted nice. If that's, you know, any help.

He tasted nice. If that's, you know, any help.
First of all, Bob was a girl. Secondly, i know how she tasted, i cooked her. :mad:

Balefire ^_^

:mp5: A set of necromancer bells, the zombies would be under my control and id have my own lil army. Other than that, gandalfs staff coz its cool and would fetch lots on ebay once i kill all zombies. Realistically, a cloning vat with Mr. T's DNA? still not realistic enough? Deathstar? DARN, ok ok, a blow up buffy doll *drools* and a mounted machine gun with the 5 guys all around me watching my back with flame throwers and another 2 guys making sure my guns ammo is healthy. Now look what youve done! Youve made me have cool ideas that wont go away! :sniper:

Souless, you don't happen to be any relation to the Abhorsen do you?

(speaking of which, I live around the corner from Garth Nix's parents)

Well, I'm off for my tea now.

*staggers off*

Braaaaiiiiiins (http://kevan.org/brain.cgi?TToL)

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I tricked you all! For I am teh uber-zombie!

First of all, Bob was a girl. Secondly, i know how she tasted, i cooked her. :mad:
hey fellow cannibal. come over and .................................






CLEAN MY CARPET! :D

Well, I'm off for my tea now.

*staggers off*

Braaaaiiiiiins (http://kevan.org/brain.cgi?TToL)

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I tricked you all! For I am teh uber-zombie!
and i did your makeup for your funeral. you looked quite nice.

hey fellow cannibal. come over and .................................






CLEAN MY CARPET! :D
I can't come over. If that hting over that way<<<< is to be believed, you live in Cali. That's far. Plus, i don't want to clean your carpet. OH, and in case it was unclear, Bob was a cat. She did not, actually get acid poured on her though. I do not have ready access to acid.No, Bob liked to curl up inside my dad's bed's boxspring. Woe was Bob, however, when the matteress people came with his new bed, removing the old. For those of you who don't know, old mattresses get shredded. Poor, Poor Bob. :(

Garth Nix is an amazing writer. I am a necromancer, more powerful than Edge or that someone of the mask, omg i forgot her name...! By the way, lets not go off topic lol, that applies to the rest of yaz aswell! :sniper:

I can't come over. If that hting over that way<<<< is to be believed, you live in Cali. That's far. Plus, i don't want to clean your carpet. OH, and in case it was unclear, Bob was a cat. She did not, actually get acid poured on her though. I do not have ready access to acid.No, Bob liked to curl up inside my dad's bed's boxspring. Woe was Bob, however, when the matteress people came with his new bed, removing the old. For those of you who don't know, old mattresses get shredded. Poor, Poor Bob. :(
LAST TIME I HIJACK THE THREAD- sancro- you idiot. you did not get the double entendre. :eek:

LAST TIME I HIJACK THE THREAD- sancro- you idiot. you did not get the double entendre. :eek:
actually, i did. You were speaking, i believe, of you pubic hair. I chose to ignore it. :D

edit: and i don't believe for a moment that that's gonna be the last time you hijack a thread. :D :D

actually, i did. You were speaking, i believe, of you pubic hair. I chose to ignore it. :D

edit: and i don't believe for a moment that that's gonna be the last time you hijack a thread. :D :Dwhat kind of animal do you think i am??? i dont have ANY! there is fire tattooed down there, smarty.

what kind of animal do you think i am??? i dont have ANY! there is fire tattooed down there, smarty.
really? that's a damn good idea for a tattoo. maybe i should get racing stripes on my...ehem. :D

Garth Nix is an amazing writer. I am a necromancer, more powerful than Edge or that someone of the mask, omg i forgot her name...! By the way, lets not go off topic lol, that applies to the rest of yaz aswell! :sniper:

*falls over dead* last dying words, uttered from a sensuous mouth, dripping with blood* " Souless, i am sorry. Garth nix is one of the best. Lirael was a most enjoyable read"

and i did your makeup for your funeral. you looked quite nice.
Yeah, ta for that. Sorry I bit your hand.

Yeah, ta for that. Sorry I bit your hand.
its okay. i like the naughty stuff. i hope you enjoyed everything else i did to you. ;)

its okay. i like the naughty stuff. i hope you enjoyed everything else i did to you. ;)
Why did you have to wait 'til I was dead?

Why did you have to wait 'til I was dead?
its not my fault you wouldnt talk to me in the bar.

One of the robot lions from Voltron.

its not my fault you wouldnt talk to me in the bar.
Actually, extensive research shows that zombies have no sexual wants or desires. Their only real urge, in fact, is to feed. ANyway, i't probably best she waited till you were dead, Longton, I doubt you would have survived the experience. Occidio seems like she'd combine pretty much any fetish (especially the more fringe and violent ones) into one ball of bloody, screaming fleshy sex. :D

One of the robot lions from Voltron.
Oh snap. Bitch ass zombies would be screwed.

Oh snap. Bitch ass zombies would be screwed.

Form Blazing Sword! Voltron like a muthafucka!

Form Blazing Sword! Voltron like a muthafucka!
wait, you got all five now? Ohhhhhh shit! some zombiesgon' piss themeselves, if they could.

I choose a Type 42 Destroyer. Imagine what a mess the phalanx would make of zombies, let alone the 4.5" gun.

That's a nice one. Do you own it or is it just a picture from the net? Are you a Kali guy?
Right now it's just a picture on the net. Hopefully at some time in the future I will own it if I ever manage to overcome my perpetually broke state.

The trick I would imagine is in getting bitten by a zombie but not eaten by one. You would just want the zombie to take a little nibble so you could become a fully intact undead killing machine. You wouldn't want a whole horde of hungry zombies to feast on you and chewing off all your limbs or you would just end up a squirmy undead torso which wouldn't be any fun at all...

Well then you just kill the zombie, eat a small chunk of the remains and commit suicide. Simple.

first of all my trusty sword, then my bokken. Then some pistols. and ammo. and HAND GRENADES! HELL YES!

Assult rifle with mass reactive rounds *bang...wizzz...splat...BOOOM!* , hev suit ( with jump addon, and helmit)
OR
Wings and Force sword.


ORRRRR

A space station.....
with 500 n2 mines and troops and atmospheric planes



OR
an eva with s2 engine

:headbang: :sniper:

P228 Firearm, XM117 M4A1 Carbine Rifle, and a back pack stock full of ammo and supplies. Bitch!