NationStates Jolt Archive

Okay, all you nice guys out there being good and respectful towards women, and yet getting the raw end of the deal, the short end of the stick, you can all take solace in one thing, one day your going to be the guy that the girl finally settles down with and marries.

At least after she's had sex with everyone else.

Hurrah! STDs!

At least after she's had sex with everyone else.


yeah, I'm waiting for that to happen for a couple of girls, but 'everyone else' seems to be multiplying ... probably because of all the sex :D

Okay, all you nice guys out there being good and respectful towards women, and yet getting the raw end of the deal, the short end of the stick, you can all take solace in one thing, one day your going to be the guy that the girl finally settles down with and marries.

At least after she's had sex with everyone else.

Unless you give up on the "nice guy" thing first. Or unless you're me, in which case women physically can't find you attractive.

Okay, all you nice guys out there being good and respectful towards women, and yet getting the raw end of the deal, the short end of the stick, you can all take solace in one thing, one day your going to be the guy that the girl finally settles down with and marries.

At least after she's had sex with everyone else.
no assholes get married too, they just have affairs with nice guys wives on the side.

"There are, it has been said, two types of people in the world. There are those who, when presented with a glass that is exactly half full, say: this glass is half full. And then there are those who say: this glass is half empty. The world belongs, however, to those who can look at the glass and say: What's up with this glass? Excuse me? Excuse me? This is my glass? I don't think so. My glass was full! And it was a bigger glass! And at the other end of the bar the world is full of the other type of person, who has a broken glass, or a glass that has been carefully knocked over (usually by one of the people calling for a larger glass), or who had no glass at all, because they were at the back of the crowd and had failed to catch the barman's eye."

--Terry Pratchett, The Truth

Hey, women think I'm nice, women think I'm rich, and women think I'm at least decently attractive, and women think I dress well. Know why I don't have a girlfriend?

Because women think I'm gay.

That's the biggest downside to being "the nice guy".

Unless you give up on the "nice guy" thing first. Or unless you're me, in which case women physically can't find you attractive.
why not you really monsterous or just down of yourself. women (and men) can sense weakness and fear and it can become a self fufilling prophesy.

Hey, women think I'm nice, women think I'm rich, and women think I'm at least decently attractive, and women think I dress well. Know why I don't have a girlfriend?

Because women think I'm gay.

That's the biggest downside to being "the nice guy".
you just need to find the ones who want to turn you straight with their extremely skillful femenine wiles and let them think its slowly working. also if you want to dump them you have the perfect excuse all set up.

why not you really monsterous or just down of yourself. women (and men) can sense weakness and fear and it can become a self fufilling prophesy.

Both. And you're most probably right, unfortunately the only thing that'll get that opinion changed is for me to find a girlfriend, which would require more confidence. What can be done? And don't tell me to just "get over it" or anything similar, if it was that easy I wouldn't be saying this.

you just need to find the ones who want to turn you straight with their extremely skillful femenine wiles and let them think its slowly working. also if you want to dump them you have the perfect excuse all set up.
I've found some. They're just all ugly or stupid.

And they call me a perfectionist...

What was that website I saw a while back relating to this? Ahh, yes. I remember now, it was this one (http://www.heartless-bitches.com/). I would probably fit into the "nice guys" category you self-martyrising wussies call yourselves. However, I also recognise that if you want something in this world, you've got to fecking take it, or someone else will. If there's a girl I want to go out with, I either impress her and ask her out, or I don't actually want to, or, more likely, I don't deserve to. I find myself in that dilemma right now in my cowardice for asking a girl out. However, if I can't even get the guts to ask her, then I don't deserve even a chance. Same thing goes for people who just assume they should be attractive. So you're a "nice guy". So what? It's not the girls who are doing anything wrong--that'd be you.

I think that all nice guys should go and read that Terry Pratchett quote several times.

If there's a girl I want to go out with, I either impress her and ask her out, or I don't actually want to, or, more likely, I don't deserve to. I find myself in that dilemma right now in my cowardice for asking a girl out. However, if I can't even get the guts to ask her, then I don't deserve even a chance.

I've tried that too. It failed. Repeatedly.

Both. And you're most probably right, unfortunately the only thing that'll get that opinion changed is for me to find a girlfriend, which would require more confidence. What can be done? And don't tell me to just "get over it" or anything similar, if it was that easy I wouldn't be saying this.
you need to cultivate a devil may care attitude, an "i may be an ugly brute but what's it to you" sneer. you can't make youreself seem beatiful, but you can make yourself seem strong and self confident. it won't get women failing at your feet, but if you don't seem so needy it scares them away, i bet you'll find a few that are interested.

"Are you fed up with your Male friends who are looking to date a woman with the appearance of a supermodel, and yet they continually whine about how "women don't like nice guys - they only want good-looking assholes"???"

Yes. Yes I am. Thanks for that link Gnostikos.

EDIT: This link might serve a better purpose though http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/niceguys/ng.shtml

See that guys? If you label yourself a 'Nice Guy', girls will run screaming because you are actually, in fact, a self-absorbed prat.

Enjoy.

I've found some. They're just all ugly or stupid.

And they call me a perfectionist...
that perfectionism thing doesn't necessarily lower your gaydar profile. how about fag hags some of them are kinda cute if you don't mind goths with issues.

I like nice guys, i always have. If a guy treats me like crap, he's gone. My number one criteria when looking for a guy to date is that he's kind. Often the guys i like are ones who seem, on the surface, to be bad guys, either because they have tattoos, or ride motorcyles, or simply because their opinions and ideals deviate from the norm. If people looked past the surface though, looked past the stereotypes, they would see they are actually sweet.

I'm a nice guy and I got the girl :D

you need to cultivate a devil may care attitude, an "i may be an ugly brute but what's it to you" sneer. you can't make youreself seem beatiful, but you can make yourself seem strong and self confident. it won't get women failing at your feet, but if you don't seem so needy it scares them away, i bet you'll find a few that are interested.

Like I said, if it was that easy, I'd have done it by now.

*Throws down headphones and slams desk in annoyance at self*

I like nice guys, i always have. If a guy treats me like crap, he's gone. My number one criteria when looking for a guy to date is that he's kind. Often the guys i like are ones who seem, on the surface, to be bad guys, either because they have tattoos, or ride motorcyles, or simply because their opinions and ideals deviate from the norm. If people looked past the surface though, looked past the stereotypes, they would see they are actually sweet.
that's why nice guys need to cultivate a bit of a bad boy exterior. if you seem to ernest and puppy dog eager it puts alot of woman off. if you are a nice guy, keep yourself true on the inside, but a bit of bluff and bluster on the outside probably won't hurt. also a bit of ink can help, it can turn a nerd into an intellectual rebel in just a few hour of pain and a few hundred bucks. just pick your ink well, some trendy flash or kanji will just make you look like a frat boy poser.

you need to cultivate a devil may care attitude, an "i may be an ugly brute but what's it to you" sneer. you can't make youreself seem beatiful, but you can make yourself seem strong and self confident. it won't get women failing at your feet, but if you don't seem so needy it scares them away, i bet you'll find a few that are interested.
Or perhaps he could just become desirable? It's not cultivating a certain attitude, it's fully expressing oneself.

I like nice guys, i always have. If a guy treats me like crap, he's gone. My number one criteria when looking for a guy to date is that he's kind. Often the guys i like are ones who seem, on the surface, to be bad guys, either because they have tattoos, or ride motorcyles, or simply because their opinions and ideals deviate from the norm. If people looked past the surface though, looked past the stereotypes, they would see they are actually sweet.
Yes, but, you see those aren't "nice guys". Those are kind guys. Nice guys never have tattoos or ride motorcycles or anything like that. The coolest guy I know is like that, with a mohawk and all, though many in the more socially reticent groups don't realise just how interesting those people can be. Nice guys are just egocentric and arrogant.

Like I said, if it was that easy, I'd have done it by now.

*Throws down headphones and slams desk in annoyance at self*
that's it, cultivate that angry rebel montif, you're a mean ugly SOB, but you have a heart of gold under that dangerous exterior.

that's it, cultivate that angry rebel montif, you're a mean ugly SOB, but you have a heart of gold under that dangerous exterior.

lol
If there is any woman who'd find that attractive, I don't want to meet her. Unless she's hot. And easy.

"Are you fed up with your Male friends who are looking to date a woman with the appearance of a supermodel, and yet they continually whine about how "women don't like nice guys - they only want good-looking assholes"???"

Yes. Yes I am. Thanks for that link Gnostikos.

EDIT: This link might serve a better purpose though http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/niceguys/ng.shtml

See that guys? If you label yourself a 'Nice Guy', girls will run screaming because you are actually, in fact, a self-absorbed prat.

Enjoy.

As I understand it, the thing to do is be a giant ass. Seems to work wonders for me.

...Often the guys i like are ones who seem, on the surface, to be bad guys, either because they have tattoos, or ride motorcyles, or simply because their opinions and ideals deviate from the norm. If people looked past the surface though, looked past the stereotypes, they would see they are actually sweet.
Thats what I say...girls If you want to look past the surface...you gotta undress me :fluffle:

that's why nice guys need to cultivate a bit of a bad boy exterior. if you seem to ernest and puppy dog eager it puts alot of woman off. if you are a nice guy, keep yourself true on the inside, but a bit of bluff and bluster on the outside probably won't hurt. also a bit of ink can help, it can turn a nerd into an intellectual rebel in just a few hour of pain and a few hundred bucks. just pick your ink well, some trendy flash or kanji will just make you look like a frat boy poser.

O.O

"Bad boy exterior"? Spending HUNDREDS OF DOLLARS on changing your outward appearance to attract girls? 'Intellectual rebel'?

Fuck no. This advice makes my frontal lobes hurt.

Ravenclaw, if you consider taking this advice, keep in mind it will attract shallow girls who you know wouldn't like you otherwise (you'd be admitting it by changing your looks to attract them). If you want a girl who'll like you for what you *seem* rather than who you *are*... Well, my advice would be to get yourself a blow-up doll. That's less lame by several degrees.

I too have noticed the girls who date psychopathic creeps, well here's what psychopathic creeps have that you don't, an appearance of confidence.
it's simple baboon politics, alpha males act confident, do a good threat display and they run the troop and get to have sex with all the girl baboons. sit and watch some monkeys at the zoo or some chimps or baboons or gorillas, you'll see!
just act like a confident monkey until you get the chick, then you can go ahead and be nice later.
some stupid girls like bad boys and angst too. as a female I dont' get it, because it is STUPID, who needs all that?!!!
Just act that way around the girl of your dreams, if she seems a little stupid.

Alpha! Alpha! Alpha!

we rule :D

I too have noticed the girls who date psychopathic creeps, well here's what psychopathic creeps have that you don't, an appearance of confidence.
it's simple baboon politics, alpha males act confident, do a good threat display and they run the troop and get to have sex with all the girl baboons. sit and watch some monkeys at the zoo or some chimps or baboons or gorillas, you'll see!
just act like a confident monkey until you get the chick, then you can go ahead and be nice later.
some stupid girls like bad boys and angst too. as a female I dont' get it, because it is STUPID, who needs all that?!!!
Just act that way around the girl of your dreams, if she seems a little stupid.

As I've probably said a thousand times before on threads like this, if you act like women should be attracted to you, then they will be attracted to you.

Hmm http://www.somethingpositive.net/sp02142004.shtml (and the following strips) should be considered. Face it, they might seem like a creep, but you don't actually know what goes on in private. Most women are not morons, and they date who they want to (unless we're talking high school here, but you shouldn't really expect to get lots of women in high school). Yeah, some boyfriends are creeps, but some might act like it and be ok. I know a lot of nice guys in relationships, I know a lot of beautiful girls in good relationships. Unfortunately, right now I'm not in a relationship, but I'm willing to admit that there is a fair amount of fault on my part. I really need to make more of an effort on my appearance and work up being more confident (as well as trying to avoid uncannily having crushes on girls who are already in relatonships).

Honestly, you don't have to pretend your someone you are not, but you do need to make more of an effort about how you look, and you do need to show a bit more confidence.

But why are you taking advice from me? I've only been in one relationship. If you're truly a nice guy, I'm sure you'll find someone eventually.

O.O

"Bad boy exterior"? Spending HUNDREDS OF DOLLARS on changing your outward appearance to attract girls? 'Intellectual rebel'?

Fuck no. This advice makes my frontal lobes hurt.

Ravenclaw, if you consider taking this advice, keep in mind it will attract shallow girls who you know wouldn't like you otherwise (you'd be admitting it by changing your looks to attract them). If you want a girl who'll like you for what you *seem* rather than who you *are*... Well, my advice would be to get yourself a blow-up doll. That's less lame by several degrees.

bah, what more important than attracting a mate, if you aren't willing to spend a couple hundred bucks then you are hardly putting forth the required effort.

its not just the exterior though, you're right. its a matter of reinventing yourself as someone you like and others will to. if your not happy with who you are now, make yourself into someone you can be happy with. reinventing yourself as a bit of a bad boy is actually a fairly easy transformation, everyone has that side to themselves its just a matter of letting go of some of your inhibitions.

sure you may be a bit of a poser at first as you are attempting the change but you can grow into your new persona. we all wear masks in this world, its a matter of picking one you enjoy wearing, and others respond to in the manner you wish them to.

that's it, cultivate that angry rebel montif, you're a mean ugly SOB, but you have a heart of gold under that dangerous exterior.

Ludite Commies switches to cammera #2922 and sees Ravenclaws silently crying on his keyboard. Lets not jump to conclusions here Nationalist Valhalla. :)

Okay, all you nice guys out there being good and respectful towards women, and yet getting the raw end of the deal, the short end of the stick, you can all take solace in one thing, one day your going to be the guy that the girl finally settles down with and marries.

At least after she's had sex with everyone else.


Well some insurance. I guess, sleeping with other women until I settle down will have to do.

I too have noticed the girls who date psychopathic creeps, well here's what psychopathic creeps have that you don't, an appearance of confidence.
it's simple baboon politics, alpha males act confident, do a good threat display and they run the troop and get to have sex with all the girl baboons. sit and watch some monkeys at the zoo or some chimps or baboons or gorillas, you'll see!
just act like a confident monkey until you get the chick, then you can go ahead and be nice later.
some stupid girls like bad boys and angst too. as a female I dont' get it, because it is STUPID, who needs all that?!!!
Just act that way around the girl of your dreams, if she seems a little stupid.

Nope. I've heard this ALL the time. 'Act like an alpha male'. The trouble here is that we're NOT monkeys or gorillas or wolves. We're big lovable men, full of egocentrism, hope, love, pride, enigmas, anger, sadness, and faith. You have to rise above this lowest common denominator madness you see around you.

You see, women want men with skills: nunchuck skills, bowhunting skills, computer hacking skills. Anything else these people try to tell you leaves no hope alive for the future of the human race.

Keep hope alive.

you shouldn't really expect to get lots of girls in high school.High school and College years are awesome :fluffle: :fluffle: :fluffle: so many girls and Beer...beer and Girls...Girls all over the place...mari, rave and more Girls...Spring Brake...MardiGrass...Girls...Girls..beer

Okay, all you nice guys out there being good and respectful towards women, and yet getting the raw end of the deal, the short end of the stick, you can all take solace in one thing, one day your going to be the guy that the girl finally settles down with and marries.

At least after she's had sex with everyone else.

I'm not a nice guy anymore, but if I were, the prospect of marriage would not console. I mean come on - marriage. It's like a lottery, except instead of money, it's a lifetime of misery and regret. And that's if you WIN.

O.O

"Bad boy exterior"? Spending HUNDREDS OF DOLLARS on changing your outward appearance to attract girls? 'Intellectual rebel'?

Fuck no. This advice makes my frontal lobes hurt.

Ravenclaw, if you consider taking this advice, keep in mind it will attract shallow girls who you know wouldn't like you otherwise (you'd be admitting it by changing your looks to attract them). If you want a girl who'll like you for what you *seem* rather than who you *are*... Well, my advice would be to get yourself a blow-up doll. That's less lame by several degrees.


While I admire your principles, let's be real, girls change stuff to atract and keep guys interested. it's a pain, but it's done, so turnabout is not wrong or imoral, and anyway if it's the hot looking beautiful girls you want, you're being shallow too. I can't stand guys lying about that stuff, the truth is no guy is going to date a girl who is fat and ugly if he has any choice and guess what, he shouldn't! Just from an evolutionary standard that's dumb. You want a healthy girl who will have healthy children. You don't want to spend your young life with someone ugly. I'm not ashamed to admit that is something I would not do either. It can go too far, but it's unrealistic to think physical appearance is unimportant. When you go out for a job interview you odn't change your looks to get the job? You never looked at 'Dress for Success' by that wanker John Molloy? c'mon give me a break!
Someone who is ugly and who smells bad might not be healthy and someone who lets themself look ugly and smell bad, is either depressed or not all that bright. Depression can be inherited. Bright happy people tend to raise bright happy kids. Of course all the girls I know are sternly TOLD how stupid their 'bad boy' fetish is. I make fun of those girls. I know the value of a guy who is nice. But I'm also over 50 and seen what a problem 'bad boys' are for marraige.

Just from an evolutionary standard that's dumb. You want a healthy girl who will have healthy children.
Not to mention that youth and what is typically considered beautiful are also sign of fertility in women. Or, at least, that's how the evolutioanry humans mind percieves it.

You see, women want men with skills <snip>
Keep hope alive.

good movie, good quote.
Napoleon Dynomite- now there's a nice guy with awesome hair to boot, and he even gets the girl.
"I caught you a delicious bass"

Ocean, :fluffle:

Nope. I've heard this ALL the time. 'Act like an alpha male'. The trouble here is that we're NOT monkeys or gorillas or wolves. We're big lovable men, full of egocentrism, hope, love, pride, enigmas, anger, sadness, and faith. You have to rise above this lowest common denominator madness you see around you.

You see, women want men with skills: nunchuck skills, bowhunting skills, computer hacking skills. Anything else these people try to tell you leaves no hope alive for the future of the human race.

Keep hope alive.

Just go up to us and talk then. And not about a subject that will drive us away ;)
I can shoot perfectly well myself...ignoring the fact I signed a GNAS form saying I wouldn't intentionally kill bird or beast by an arrow....and my computer hacking...well it's not exactly my aim but if I wanted to I know who could teach me. Modern woman no longer needs a hunter, but it's still nice to have the protective bit...confidence helps. I'm rabbitting...I think I need to go have my shower :(

Ludite Commies switches to cammera #2922 and sees Ravenclaws silently crying on his keyboard. Lets not jump to conclusions here Nationalist Valhalla. :)
oh go monkeywrench some textile mills why don't ya.

Just go up to us and talk then. And not about a subject that will drive us away ;)
Well, it's your loss if you're not into entomology...

good movie, good quote.
Napoleon Dynomite- now there's a nice guy with awesome hair to boot, and he even gets the girl.
"I caught you a delicious bass"

Ocean, :fluffle:
but he did have that angry edge, "Whatever I feel like I wanna do, gosh!"

That movie is a bit strange. I enjoyed it much more AFTER watching it, just recalling its zaininess and hilarity, than WHILE watching it....it was rather dull at the time.

That movie is a bit strange. I enjoyed it much more AFTER watching it, just recalling its zaininess and hilarity, than WHILE watching it....it was rather dull at the time.
Hmm, it had an odd effect on me.
While watching it, I felt that it was lame. But at the same time, I felt that that lameness made it good. It was odd.

That movie is a bit strange. I enjoyed it much more AFTER watching it, just recalling its zaininess and hilarity, than WHILE watching it....it was rather dull at the time.
it was a bit flat and slow in places, but the characters were so oddly charming its flaws were easy to forgive.

it was a bit flat and slow in places, but the characters were so oddly charming its flaws were easy to forgive.

The scene with Napoleon walking/strutting down the street in his suit is too good to put into words. And he's an amazing dancer.

Note to nice guys: if a guy can dance, he instantly becomes about three times as good-looking. So sign up for those swing dancing lessons, trust me, fun is had by all.

The scene with Napoleon walking/strutting down the street in his suit is too good to put into words. And he's an amazing dancer.

Note to nice guys: if a guy can dance, he instantly becomes about three times as good-looking. So sign up for those swing dancing lessons, trust me, fun is had by all.

Heh. Dancing. Whatever you say, Romeo.

Heh. Dancing. Whatever you say, Romeo.
last time I checked I would be more easily compared to juliet...I think that last post would definately lack credibility if I wasn't a girl, which thankfully, I am. So give me a bit more credit Shaed ;)

last time I checked I would be more easily compared to juliet...I think that last post would definately lack credibility if I wasn't a girl, which thankfully, I am. So give me a bit more credit Shaed ;)

Heh. You get a cookie for shaming me to only a minor degree :p

But nonetheless... dancing still sucks ^.^

good movie, good quote.
Napoleon Dynomite- now there's a nice guy with awesome hair to boot, and he even gets the girl.
"I caught you a delicious bass"

Ocean, :fluffle:Good movie indeed...

Heh. You get a cookie for shaming me to only a minor degree :p

But nonetheless... dancing still sucks ^.^

Dancing is awesome. Especially on the corpses of your fallen foes.

Dancing is awesome. Especially on the corpses of your fallen foes.
oh sure it sounds like fun, but they tend to be all lumpy and slippery or sticky and its very easy to slip and sprain an ankle or wrench a knee.

Good movie indeed...

hey Kreitzmoorland,
Wazup Bro'

http://templeotrunks.com/humor/cartoons/wazup1.gif
Things are good, ocean. Oh, the nostalgia of old beer commercials. Labat Blue and Molson (or should i say coors now?) used to have the best ones though. canadian beer = good ads

that's why nice guys need to cultivate a bit of a bad boy exterior. if you seem to ernest and puppy dog eager it puts alot of woman off. if you are a nice guy, keep yourself true on the inside, but a bit of bluff and bluster on the outside probably won't hurt. also a bit of ink can help, it can turn a nerd into an intellectual rebel in just a few hour of pain and a few hundred bucks. just pick your ink well, some trendy flash or kanji will just make you look like a frat boy poser.

good good good advice.
just say no kanjis. and barbwire around the biceps.

hey Kreitzmoorland,
did you get my Valentines Card? :cool:

Things are good, ocean. Oh, the nostalgia of old beer commercials. Labat Blue and Molson (or should i say coors now?) used to have the best ones though. canadian beer = good adslife is like a beer comercial...sometimes as good as a Canadian beer :fluffle:

hey Kreitzmoorland,
did you get my Valentines Card? :cool:

Ack!! no, but I'm utterly technologically inept, so if you tell me how, I'll attempt to find it.

Ack!! no, but I'm utterly technologically inept, so if you tell me how, I'll attempt to find it.
hmmm... here it is ....

http://www.christmas-treasures.com/OldWorldChristmas/Catalog/GlassOrnaments/Images/30017.jpg

Be mine Kreitzmoorland !

-snip-

At least after she's had sex with everyone else.
think of the bright side. when you are married to her, and she says "no honey, not tonight, i have a headache....."
you can reply" oh really? and did you have a headache when you screwed any of the 54 guys you have been with????????????huh??????"
then you have one up on her.

-snip-

At least after she's had sex with everyone else.
think of the bright side. when you are married to her, and she says "no honey, not tonight, i have a headache....."
you can reply" oh really? and did you have a headache when you screwed any of the 54 guys you have been with????????????huh??????"
then you have one up on her.

hmmm... here it is for all to see

http://www.christmas-treasures.com/OldWorldChristmas/Catalog/GlassOrnaments/Images/30017.jpg

Dear Lord! That just shocked me to smithereens. I can only deal with tackiness in small, measured, doses. that was beyond wrong

EDIT: Ocean, you better change your tack, or I will remain unnatainable. :)

...that was beyond wrong.Yeah it was beyond 56k modems too *evil laugh* :cool:

you do realize that any type of number-letter combinations that pretain to computers are completely meaningless to me, so i missed the modem referance.

I dont come here to Debate...I come here to engage conversation with females, get them on a private room...and Cyber all the way to heaven...then start again and again...

Change their mind?...

yes I get them to change their mind...From No...to maybe...from maybe to "hmmmmokay".....from there to "encore...encore"...

does it work? yes all the time.

AAANNNDDD ocean's not-so-secret-agenda is revealed

you do realize that any type of number-letter combinations that pretain to computers are completely meaningless to me, so i missed the modem referance.
thats allrite as long as you know all the good Beers... :D

http://www.f1cartvideos.com/f1girl157.jpg

thats allrite as long as you know all the good Beers... :D



sorry to dissapoint...just the ads. I'm really astonishingly innocent.

sorry to dissapoint...just the ads. I'm really astonishingly innocent.thats allrite, I like innocent girls. :cool:
*evil laugh again*

thats allrite, I like innocent girls. :cool:
all the innocent ones are secretly 300 pound 48 year old transvestites with s&m spanking dungeons dug out of the crawl space under their trailers...

present company excluded of course.

cheers! I'm off now, I have to be up early tomorrow. later nice-alpha-male

cheers! I'm off now, I have to be up early tomorrow. later nice-alpha-male
bye...dont forget to e-mail

*kisses her goodBye*

You see, women want men with skills: nunchuck skills, bowhunting skills, computer hacking skills. Anything else these people try to tell you leaves no hope alive for the future of the human race.

Keep hope alive.

Any dating advice that doesn't come from Napoleon Dynamite?

It's always seemed to me that if you really want to find out what kind of guy a girl likes, listen to what kind of guy she complains about. Sure you hear girls saying things like "my boyfriend likes that stupid _____" or "he tells the stupidest jokes about _____" Listen to the top 10 complaints list and act just like the guy they sound like they hate and they'll be falling all over you. They'll be angry at you a lot, but they'll follow you anywhere.

You never hear complaints like "my boyfriend is a broke loser" or "my boyfriend is so quiet." Why don't you hear those complaints? Because she won't go out with him.

all the innocent ones are secretly 300 pound 48 year old transvestites with s&m spanking dungeons dug out of the crawl space under their trailers...

like he says...

name?
Austin Danger Powers...danger's my middle name..
What I mean is that I will take my chances...sure I will get screwed sometimes...
but if you dont play, you cant win.

don't get mushy on me now. Goodnight ocean :)

don't get mushy on me now. Goodnight ocean :)
goodnite.
*kisses her some more*

Hmm http://www.somethingpositive.net/sp02142004.shtml (and the following strips) should be considered. Face it, they might seem like a creep, but you don't actually know what goes on in private. Most women are not morons, and they date who they want to (unless we're talking high school here, but you shouldn't really expect to get lots of women in high school). Yeah, some boyfriends are creeps, but some might act like it and be ok. I know a lot of nice guys in relationships, I know a lot of beautiful girls in good relationships. Unfortunately, right now I'm not in a relationship, but I'm willing to admit that there is a fair amount of fault on my part. I really need to make more of an effort on my appearance and work up being more confident (as well as trying to avoid uncannily having crushes on girls who are already in relatonships).

Honestly, you don't have to pretend your someone you are not, but you do need to make more of an effort about how you look, and you do need to show a bit more confidence.

But why are you taking advice from me? I've only been in one relationship. If you're truly a nice guy, I'm sure you'll find someone eventually.


Know what? That being attracted to t he already attached thing is stupid. I know of a guy I kind of liked, nice guy many ways so far as I could see, but he only liked women who were spoken for. He wound up breaking up someone else's marriage. No kids involved, thank God, but he got her pregnant while she was still married to the other guy! eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek! I don't think that's too cool. I'm not saying you'd go to that extreme.
Probably for you, it's that you really are scared to face an unattached girl.

.. when you are married to her, and she says "no honey, not tonight, i have a headache.....".
Is that a mith..or married women actually say that??? :confused:

A girl told me once...that its absolute bullshit!!

Nope. I've heard this ALL the time. 'Act like an alpha male'. The trouble here is that we're NOT monkeys or gorillas or wolves. We're big lovable men, full of egocentrism, hope, love, pride, enigmas, anger, sadness, and faith. You have to rise above this lowest common denominator madness you see around you.

You see, women want men with skills: nunchuck skills, bowhunting skills, computer hacking skills. Anything else these people try to tell you leaves no hope alive for the future of the human race.

Keep hope alive.
Gosh! Freaking idiots.

think of the bright side. when you are married to her, and she says "no honey, not tonight, i have a headache....."
you can reply" oh really? and did you have a headache when you screwed any of the 54 guys you have been with????????????huh??????"
then you have one up on her.
Because that's such a good position to be in.

Because that's such a good position to be in.
55th :(

55th :(
I pictured that situation in my head, and then the response that my girlfriend from high school would give to it. She would tear a strip a mile wide off the asshole's back. Funny as hell.

I pictured that situation in my head, and then the response that my girlfriend from high school would give to it. She would tear a strip a mile wide off the asshole's back. Funny as hell.
so there is no chance in hell you would marry her...?

The stereotypical nice guy is also boring as hell.

I learned, oddly enough, through RP, that people want to be around interesting people.

Relationships are as much entertainment as anything else.

Of course, the gals might just like that I have naturally sharp canine teeth and a habit of using them. Eh.

Of course, the gals might just like that I have naturally sharp canine teeth and a habit of using them. Eh.
teeth can be a valuable tool...if used properly...

Okay, all you nice guys out there being good and respectful towards women, and yet getting the raw end of the deal, the short end of the stick, you can all take solace in one thing, one day your going to be the guy that the girl finally settles down with and marries.

At least after she's had sex with everyone else.
I don't wanna get a girl who's already had sex! :(

I don't wanna get a girl who's already had sex! :(its a Geography thing...In some countries you can get a Virgin Wife...In others you almost never do.

its a Geography thing...In some countries you can get a Virgin Wife...In others you almost never do.
Ooh! Know which countries?

*Prepares to go out and buy a plane ticket*

I don't wanna get a girl who's already had sex! :(

Aww, there goes any chance I had.
:(

Ooh! Know which countries?

*Prepares to go out and buy a plane ticket*hmm I rather not say, some gals could be offended and I cant blame them....besides I only know for a few countries.

But if you know anyone who travels a lot...he can tell you.

*wonders how to change subject* :D

Okay, all you nice guys out there being good and respectful towards women, and yet getting the raw end of the deal, the short end of the stick, you can all take solace in one thing, one day your going to be the guy that the girl finally settles down with and marries.

At least after she's had sex with everyone else.
Ha HA!

Well you know what they say Nice Guys finish last........
and their women thank them for it. Ha HA

Hi their everyone im a mildly decent looking chap
See
http://upl.silentwhisper.net/uplfol.../Harlesburg.JPG

Ha HA!

Well you know what they say Nice Guys finish last........
and their women thank them for it. Ha HA

Hi their everyone im a mildly decent looking chap
See
http://upl.silentwhisper.net/uplfol.../Harlesburg.JPG

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The requested mildly/decent/looking/chap.JPG was not found on this server.

Apache/1.3.33 Server at upl.silentwhisper.net Port 80

BTW no way in hell im looking for a chap... :D

Ha HA!

Well you know what they say Nice Guys finish last........
and their women thank them for it. Ha HA

Hi their everyone im a mildly decent looking chap
See
http://upl.silentwhisper.net/uplfol.../Harlesburg.JPG
the link's not working :(

so there is no chance in hell you would marry her...?
Who, my high school gf or the hypothetical woman? I probably won't marry my ex gf, simply because we would probably kill each other within the first 5 years. That and I have no clue where she is. As for the hypothetical woman, I seriously doubt it. Especially since I'm not so keen on the whole marriage bit anyway which is possibly influenced by the fact that my parents have been together for 20 years and they never got married. Although I suppose they are married by common law by now.

I don't wanna get a girl who's already had sex! :(
Id say you better hurry up the way the worlds going theyll all be 12 or something
Shudders

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The requested mildly/decent/looking/chap.JPG was not found on this server.

Apache/1.3.33 Server at upl.silentwhisper.net Port 80

BTW no way in hell im looking for a chap... :D
Ok Arrgh Jordaxania you useless Welshman bloody go back to the bog!
Jordaxania- :mp5:

Id say you better hurry up the way the worlds going theyll all be 12 or something
Shudders
Then I'd better find myself a girl who's that age then. :p

http://upl.silentwhisper.net/uplfolders/upload5/Harlesburg.JPG

Petrhaps it will work?

http://upl.silentwhisper.net/uplfolders/upload5/Harlesburg.JPG

Petrhaps it will work?
Yes it works. Posting that will DEFINITELY scare the babes away :(

Some would/most would argue its a damn site better than the real me :p

Some would/most would argue its a damn site better than the real me :p
That, also, scares the babes away. :(

Okay, all you nice guys out there being good and respectful towards women, and yet getting the raw end of the deal, the short end of the stick, you can all take solace in one thing, one day your going to be the guy that the girl finally settles down with and marries.

At least after she's had sex with everyone else.
i was feeling better about myself until that last sentence hit me :(

why is it that chicks dig assholes?

(oh man that sounds gross... :p )

F*ck em all, I say, in every sense of the word.

Ye gods, if women want the arseholes let 'em have them! Blood tells, and sooner or later the you'll all be good looking, horribly aggressive and brain dead slaves to all the smart, nice people who maybe don't cultivate that 'bad boy/girl' exterior and instead get on with the whole evolution thing. Ya know, the thing that makes us more than animals?

Anyway. It ain't the whole 'why won't they date me' phenomena that really pisses me off. If you don't want to screw me, fine, whatever. I like girls who are my friends rather more than those who've tried to use me in the past. But why the hell do they freakin' persist in telling me, and those like me, all about their boyfriends and what screw ups they are? I mean, what do you want us to say - 'yes he's a dickhead, dump him?' We know that ain't gonna happen cos your tiny feminine brain is under the control of his sex pheromones. For heavens sake, instead of trying to turn a sexy bad guy nice, why not find a not-half-bad nice guy and make him sexy? I guarantee far better returns. Changing someones appearance and behaviour is a much easier task than trying to get some well built, thuggish gorilla 'who is so nice really' (bollocks :headbang: ) and turning him into someone that regards you as other than a humping toy. And instead of trying to turn nice guys bad by shaming them or making them feel inadequate, you could actually be nice about it. Who the hell knows, it might just work! :eek:

And for the record, those 'Heartless Bitches' are the greatest anti-female equality propagandists I have ever seen. I don't know whether to laugh or cry, cos they're doing far better than me any day.

AAANNNDDD ocean's not-so-secret-agenda is revealedhay chihuahua!!!...I feel naked

Okay, all you nice guys out there being good and respectful towards women, and yet getting the raw end of the deal, the short end of the stick, you can all take solace in one thing, one day your going to be the guy that the girl finally settles down with and marries.

At least after she's had sex with everyone else.

If you're holding out for a ho', then you're not a "nice guy", you're just stupid.

But why the hell do they freakin' persist in telling me, and those like me, all about their boyfriends and what screw ups they are? I mean, what do you want us to say - 'yes he's a dickhead, dump him?'

For heavens sake, instead of trying to turn a sexy bad guy nice, why not find a not-half-bad nice guy and make him sexy? I guarantee far better returns.
lmao! too true! and can i be the first to volunteer for the "nice guy made sexy" program? :p

Or perhaps he could just become desirable? It's not cultivating a certain attitude, it's fully expressing oneself.


Yes, but, you see those aren't "nice guys". Those are kind guys. Nice guys never have tattoos or ride motorcycles or anything like that. The coolest guy I know is like that, with a mohawk and all, though many in the more socially reticent groups don't realise just how interesting those people can be. Nice guys are just egocentric and arrogant.
And just how does that fit in with any rational interpretation of the word "nice", pray tell?

Know what? That being attracted to t he already attached thing is stupid. I know of a guy I kind of liked, nice guy many ways so far as I could see, but he only liked women who were spoken for. He wound up breaking up someone else's marriage. No kids involved, thank God, but he got her pregnant while she was still married to the other guy! eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek! I don't think that's too cool. I'm not saying you'd go to that extreme.
Probably for you, it's that you really are scared to face an unattached girl.

No it was honestly just fluke. The handful of girls I have met and got along with and was about to ask out had guys already. Curse their black hearts. I have no interest in breaking a relationship, and quickly move on.

What was that website I saw a while back relating to this? Ahh, yes. I remember now, it was this one (http://www.heartless-bitches.com/). I would probably fit into the "nice guys" category you self-martyrising wussies call yourselves. However, I also recognise that if you want something in this world, you've got to fecking take it, or someone else will. If there's a girl I want to go out with, I either impress her and ask her out, or I don't actually want to, or, more likely, I don't deserve to. I find myself in that dilemma right now in my cowardice for asking a girl out. However, if I can't even get the guts to ask her, then I don't deserve even a chance. Same thing goes for people who just assume they should be attractive. So you're a "nice guy". So what? It's not the girls who are doing anything wrong--that'd be you.

I think that all nice guys should go and read that Terry Pratchett quote several times.
Although it agrees with you insofar as "if you want something, you've got to take it", the whole point of this quote is that that attitude is unpleasant, and that it is sad that the world works like that - unlike you, he is not endorsing it!

On a somewhat unrelated note, I seem to have an anti-gaydar. I was going to ask this one girl to a movie when her girlfriend comes up and kisses her. Yeah, that one left me feeling like an idiot. Then when I asked another girl out her friends burst out laughing because she was a lesbian as well. I seem to have really bad luck with this shit.

Id say you better hurry up the way the worlds going theyll all be 12 or something
Shudders
...don't be mean, there's still some of us out here who aren't 12 and not had sex.

Don't blame us if the only ones who ask us out are the sketchy ones. What happens if you ask out a girl who's single, not gay, etc etc, cos that seems to be what happens every time.
It doesn't help when they tell us we should stop waiting for Mr.Right rather than Mr.Right-now.
I guess I'm bucking the trend and waiting.

Is that a mith..or married women actually say that??? :confused:

A girl told me once...that its absolute bullshit!! well, most of the married guys and gals i know have a longer list of excuses that she can use, but that not only seems to be the most common, it also is the "blanket statement" used when others are talking about the subject.

Any dating advice that doesn't come from Napoleon Dynamite?

It's always seemed to me that if you really want to find out what kind of guy a girl likes, listen to what kind of guy she complains about. Sure you hear girls saying things like "my boyfriend likes that stupid _____" or "he tells the stupidest jokes about _____" Listen to the top 10 complaints list and act just like the guy they sound like they hate and they'll be falling all over you. They'll be angry at you a lot, but they'll follow you anywhere.

You never hear complaints like "my boyfriend is a broke loser" or "my boyfriend is so quiet." Why don't you hear those complaints? Because she won't go out with him.

I do have advice, really. You've made this same argument again with the whole alpha-male thing. I don't know why this is hard to understand: women want men who treat them well. They want funny, smart, handsome, friendly men. Also, men typically want to be smart, funny, handsome, and friendly themselves.

See how nice this works out in my scenerio? No one has to lie, no one has to put on a false front, gals get their nice guys, nice guys get their gals and we all go home.

I do have advice, really. You've made this same argument again with the whole alpha-male thing. I don't know why this is hard to understand: women want men who treat them well. They want funny, smart, handsome, friendly men. Also, men typically want to be smart, funny, handsome, and friendly themselves.

See how nice this works out in my scenerio? No one has to lie, no one has to put on a false front, gals get their nice guys, nice guys get their gals and we all go home.
and that leaves all the asshole-types who currently get the girls to beat the shit out of each other in the car park, afterwards

and that leaves all the asshole-types who currently get the girls to beat the shit out of each other in the car park, afterwardsLike I said, it works out great for everyone!

Well I always let myself down with women, I got the looks and the charm but I lack the ability to not say something in a sentence they will find obnoxious or nasty.

Ahhh, its all good. Luckily there are women out there who are shallow enough to go on looks, trust me, I've met them. :D

"There are, it has been said, two types of people in the world. There are those who, when presented with a glass that is exactly half full, say: this glass is half full. And then there are those who say: this glass is half empty. The world belongs, however, to those who can look at the glass and say: What's up with this glass? Excuse me? Excuse me? This is my glass? I don't think so. My glass was full! And it was a bigger glass! And at the other end of the bar the world is full of the other type of person, who has a broken glass, or a glass that has been carefully knocked over (usually by one of the people calling for a larger glass), or who had no glass at all, because they were at the back of the crowd and had failed to catch the barman's eye."

--Terry Pratchett, The Truth

Talk about over-extending a metaphor beyond its capabilities! Sheesh! :eek:

I like nice guys, I just don't like wimps. They're not synonymous. I want an equal. Someone who respects me and demands I respect him. I've had relationships where I was totally dominant, and while it was nice for a while, I lost respect in the end. I've never been out with a guy who could dominate me, and if he tries, I'm gone.

Alright girls. How about this?

If someone treats you with respect, but isn't completely subserviant to you. Takes time out to be with you when you are down, takes you shopping when you want, buys you flowers, drives you where-ever you want to go, but still has time for his mates. He sits by your bedside for a week in hospital after you've been in a serious car crash, and makes sure you're ok because he is genuinely worried about you. Is he a "nice guy", who should be dumped because he's insecure, or is he someone who cares about you?

I'm still convinced that I'm dying alone.

I do have advice, really. You've made this same argument again with the whole alpha-male thing. I don't know why this is hard to understand: women want men who treat them well. They want funny, smart, handsome, friendly men. Also, men typically want to be smart, funny, handsome, and friendly themselves.

See how nice this works out in my scenerio? No one has to lie, no one has to put on a false front, gals get their nice guys, nice guys get their gals and we all go home.

Well, I only made an argument once, but that won't work. Women don't want the kind of guy they say they want. It's something weird with pretty much every mammal on the face of the Earth. Females object to the only kind of male that they'll mate with.

In the animal kingdom this works out fine. Females end up forcing males to breed for persistence, strength, stamina or whatever that particular species needs.

Listen to how people always talk about the psychology of romance in terms of metaphors and intangibles. "you can't help the way you feel about someone," "there just wasn't that spark" or "there was such chemistry between them."

Women are choosey, but they have no real idea what ideal they are appealing to to make their choices.

Men aren't choosey unless they think they are in a position where they think that they can get one girl or the other but not both, and then the choice usually comes down to which is easier to get.

You may think I'm over generalizing but these experiments have been done. Researchers have sent both men and women, who surveys said were attractive, and both were sent into singles locations and said something along the lines of "I'd like to buy you a drink, chat for a bit, then take you home and have sex with you." Virtually 100% of the men said yes and the women said no.

Which is not to say that women won't go home with a guy they just met. Plenty of them will, but they'll insist on pretending that sex isn't why, hence the old trope of "come up to see my etchings." Just like lions insist on a male that can fight for a long time, or gazelles insist on a male that can run for a long time, human females select for a sort of emotional persistence. The ability to be unfazed by appearant rejection. They'll say that men who don't measure up in this capacity are too insecure ("I told him I didn't want to go out with him and he stopped asking, what a wimp!") or some other such thing. This seems to be especially true in America where persistence is considered to be the single biggest determinate of any sort of success, more than any sort of talent or intelligence.

"They set great store by keeness. If only because actual merit was so rare."
Terry Pratchett -- The Truth

This also means that trying to find out whether or not a woman is interested in you already is usually a waste of time. They won't let you know, and nature didn't design you to be choosey anyway. I once had a stalker who was a girl that I had a crush on and who, I thought, wouldn't give me the time of day. You just have to put yourself out there and learn the art of the snappy comeback just in case you're shot down. People can be just as impressed by resiliance in the face of failure as they can by success and getting shot down gracefully by one might earn you a chance with another.

Like I said, it works out great for everyone!
yaaaaay! :)

think of the bright side. when you are married to her, and she says "no honey, not tonight, i have a headache....."
you can reply" oh really? and did you have a headache when you screwed any of the 54 guys you have been with????????????huh??????"
then you have one up on her.


And you expect that to get her to fuck you? Ahh, young one you have much to learn. Just say "ok, do you want a tylenol?" this will score brownie points so the next time you want to do anything, out of the ordinary, just remind her and she'll feel obliged. It's worked wonders.

Bad asses have lots of sex. Nice Guys have the best sex.

Bad asses have lots of sex. Nice Guys have the best sex.
naw nice guys just have low expectations and boring fetishes so they think they're having the best sex, rutting away like little vanilla robots in the drone birth factory.

And you expect that to get her to fuck you? Ahh, young one you have much to learn. Just say "ok, do you want a tylenol?" this will score brownie points so the next time you want to do anything, out of the ordinary, just remind her and she'll feel obliged. It's worked wonders.

Bad asses have lots of sex. Nice Guys have the best sex.
thats great. i am a female. and i aint young, kiddo.

That, also, scares the babes away.
Not if they take pity on me. :p
Serriously dont take their advice it will corupt you. BOO

F*ck em all, I say, in every sense of the word.

Ye gods, if women want the arseholes let 'em have them! Blood tells, and sooner or later the you'll all be good looking, horribly aggressive and brain dead slaves to all the smart, nice people who maybe don't cultivate that 'bad boy/girl' exterior and instead get on with the whole evolution thing. Ya know, the thing that makes us more than animals?

Anyway. It ain't the whole 'why won't they date me' phenomena that really pisses me off. If you don't want to screw me, fine, whatever. I like girls who are my friends rather more than those who've tried to use me in the past. But why the hell do they freakin' persist in telling me, and those like me, all about their boyfriends and what screw ups they are? I mean, what do you want us to say - 'yes he's a dickhead, dump him?' We know that ain't gonna happen cos your tiny feminine brain is under the control of his sex pheromones. For heavens sake, instead of trying to turn a sexy bad guy nice, why not find a not-half-bad nice guy and make him sexy? I guarantee far better returns. Changing someones appearance and behaviour is a much easier task than trying to get some well built, thuggish gorilla 'who is so nice really' (bollocks :headbang: ) and turning him into someone that regards you as other than a humping toy. And instead of trying to turn nice guys bad by shaming them or making them feel inadequate, you could actually be nice about it. Who the hell knows, it might just work! :eek:

And for the record, those 'Heartless Bitches' are the greatest anti-female equality propagandists I have ever seen. I don't know whether to laugh or cry, cos they're doing far better than me any day.
Personification of Excellence

Not if they take pity on me. :p
Serriously dont take their advice it will corupt you. BOO
Pah! :p

*Takes their advice*

...don't be mean, there's still some of us out here who aren't 12 and not had sex.

Don't blame us if the only ones who ask us out are the sketchy ones. What happens if you ask out a girl who's single, not gay, etc etc, cos that seems to be what happens every time.
It doesn't help when they tell us we should stop waiting for Mr.Right rather than Mr.Right-now.
I guess I'm bucking the trend and waiting.
Beep beep beep beep
*NewsFlash*

Im in the same boat.
One of the funniest things ive ever heard was when i told a girl i was a virgin she said "i wish i was still a virgin"(She lost it in the back seat of a car)-Somehow i think its different for guys but eh i know nothing.

I'm still convinced that I'm dying alone.
Id die alone with you but it would ruin your plan

If there's a girl I want to go out with, I either impress her and ask her out, or I don't actually want to, or, more likely, I don't deserve to.
THAT'S the problem! You're trying to impress her, which is a sign of insecurity. Girls are repelled by insecurity. Therefore, trying to impress girls repells them.

Try this; relax and be yourself. Act the way around her the way you would around any of your buddies. Stop being insecure around her and she will like you.

Bad asses have lots of sex. Nice Guys have the best sex.
I like the Tylenol idea, but this last statement is just dead wrong. It is a view of how the world should be rather then how it is. One of the reasons girls like jerks is because the sex is mindblowingly good. Add that to a lack of insecurity, and you've got instand "panties down" action.

F*ck em all, I say, in every sense of the word.

Ye gods, if women want the arseholes let 'em have them! Blood tells, and sooner or later the you'll all be good looking, horribly aggressive and brain dead slaves to all the smart, nice people who maybe don't cultivate that 'bad boy/girl' exterior and instead get on with the whole evolution thing. Ya know, the thing that makes us more than animals?

Anyway. It ain't the whole 'why won't they date me' phenomena that really pisses me off. If you don't want to screw me, fine, whatever. I like girls who are my friends rather more than those who've tried to use me in the past. But why the hell do they freakin' persist in telling me, and those like me, all about their boyfriends and what screw ups they are? I mean, what do you want us to say - 'yes he's a dickhead, dump him?' We know that ain't gonna happen cos your tiny feminine brain is under the control of his sex pheromones. For heavens sake, instead of trying to turn a sexy bad guy nice, why not find a not-half-bad nice guy and make him sexy? I guarantee far better returns. Changing someones appearance and behaviour is a much easier task than trying to get some well built, thuggish gorilla 'who is so nice really' (bollocks :headbang: ) and turning him into someone that regards you as other than a humping toy. And instead of trying to turn nice guys bad by shaming them or making them feel inadequate, you could actually be nice about it. Who the hell knows, it might just work! :eek:

And for the record, those 'Heartless Bitches' are the greatest anti-female equality propagandists I have ever seen. I don't know whether to laugh or cry, cos they're doing far better than me any day.
No offense, but you have thorougly proven that you know squat about squat when it comes to sexual attraction and social dynamics. Enjoy your lonely, sexless life.

Don't blame us if the only ones who ask us out are the sketchy ones. What happens if you ask out a girl who's single, not gay, etc etc, cos that seems to be what happens every time.
It doesn't help when they tell us we should stop waiting for Mr.Right rather than Mr.Right-now.
I guess I'm bucking the trend and waiting.
By lowering your standards and just taking whatever comes along, you are in a mentality of scarcity. Guess what, there are literally BILLIONS of men and women out there. If you talk to enough of them, you WILL find one that fits your wants exactly. By settling, you're dooming yourself to an unfullfilling relationship and quite possibly a miserable life.

well, most of the married guys and gals i know have a longer list of excuses that she can use, but that not only seems to be the most common, it also is the "blanket statement" used when others are talking about the subject.
what Id like to know...is wheter Married Women use that a lot...if married women lose interest in sex?....if they are less horny than single ones?... :confused:

should not be an age thing...because ive meet girl of all ages...and I think some of them were married...but they seemed pretty healthy.

dp

After reading this thread I have a question for girls here and guys if they want.

I have been courting this girl for a good time now and we are good friends and all that but I REALLY like her, like most girls she goes for those "bad guys" or rather guys that have one thing on their mind, you know.
I guess I am one of those "good guys", respect women and all that.
I can't count the times I have had to listen to the life storys of my friends and see them cry etc. and thees are "bad guys" and they tell me stuff you would not belive because they trust me and they know they can.
So I am allways the trusted friend.
I cant dance and that has hurt me often when with a girl at a bar or something like that and I am not a big joker or fighter so my question is what the hell do guys like me have to do to get the girl they like?

... get her to fuck you?
...
just remind her and she'll feel obliged...I have trouble with the word obliged...
It sound like she really doesnt want to...and she is psicologically forced to

love is a beatifull thing...there is millions of healthy men and women who wants some...

you just need to say the ritgh things at the rigth time...just like in any other sport... Practice makes you better...
<<Just do it -Nike-

I've dated nice guys before, but I've never dated the "over confident asshole" type.
One of the qualities I definately look for in guys is a sense of humor, because if he can't make me laugh, or laugh when I'm being dumb, then it's not a very good match. *shrugs*

I've dated nice guys before, but I've never dated the "over confident asshole" type. That cause all the Confident types are taken...
:D

That cause all the Confident types are taken...
:D

Haha sure that's it :p

Really, they just piss me off.

After reading this thread I have a question for girls here and guys if they want.

I have been courting this girl for a good time now and we are good friends and all that but I REALLY like her, like most girls she goes for those "bad guys" or rather guys that have one thing on their mind, you know.
I guess I am one of those "good guys", respect women and all that.
I can't count the times I have had to listen to the life storys of my friends and see them cry etc. and thees are "bad guys" and they tell me stuff you would not belive because they trust me and they know they can.
So I am allways the trusted friend.
I cant dance and that has hurt me often when with a girl at a bar or something like that and I am not a big joker or fighter so my question is what the hell do guys like me have to do to get the girl they like?
Um... learn how to dance?

J/k.

Seriously, have you ever thought that you're lusting after these girls the way they're lusting after the "bad boys"?

If there isn't a spark there on her end, it probably won't happen - or if it does, it certainly won't last. So honestly, what you need to do is stop wasting time with these girls who don't know how awesome you are and open yourself up for real opportunities!

naw nice guys just have low expectations and boring fetishes so they think they're having the best sex, rutting away like little vanilla robots in the drone birth factory.
kkrrhm I know I shouldn't say this but that is so true :D

think of the bright side. when you are married to her, and she says "no honey, not tonight, i have a headache....."
you can reply" oh really? and did you have a headache when you screwed any of the 54 guys you have been with????????????huh??????"
then you have one up on her.
"Yeah, every single time they started whining..."

If your (well not yours, OM) wife says "no honey, I have a headache" you should really start thinking why your wife doesn't want to have sex with you. She's obviously not very pleased with it. (of course there are moments when you just don't feel like it at all, but headache is rarely the reason. Sex is a good painkiller)

After reading this thread I have a question for girls here and guys if they want.
...
Does this girl really know you fancy her? Have you actually said it to her? Because in few months I have heard 3 different guys I've known for years telling me that they have fancied me (really don't know why all of them wanted to tell me now.) Everyone saying, you know how it is...blaablaablaa
NO I DON'T KNOW! I didn't have a slightest idea.

Does this girl really know you fancy her? Have you actually said it to her? Because in few months I have heard 3 different guys I've known for years telling me that they have fancied me (really don't know why all of them wanted to tell me now.) Everyone saying, you know how it is...blaablaablaa
NO I DON'T KNOW! I didn't have a slightest idea.
Hmm, that's a good point too.

And as much as we women like to call men "clueless," we're really no better (particularly when it comes to figuring out that someone we like, likes us!).

what Id like to know...is wheter Married Women use that a lot...if married women lose interest in sex?....if they are less horny than single ones?... :confused:

should not be an age thing...because ive meet girl of all ages...and I think some of them were married...but they seemed pretty healthy.
If your (or anyone else's) wife is less interested in sex after marriage, then one of two things happened.

1. You got played by someone who wanted something other then you.
2. You're not making things interesting, like they were when you were dating.

After reading this thread I have a question for girls here and guys if they want.

I have been courting this girl for a good time now and we are good friends and all that but I REALLY like her, like most girls she goes for those "bad guys" or rather guys that have one thing on their mind, you know.
I guess I am one of those "good guys", respect women and all that.
I can't count the times I have had to listen to the life storys of my friends and see them cry etc. and thees are "bad guys" and they tell me stuff you would not belive because they trust me and they know they can.
So I am allways the trusted friend.
I cant dance and that has hurt me often when with a girl at a bar or something like that and I am not a big joker or fighter so my question is what the hell do guys like me have to do to get the girl they like?
Don't try to impress her.
Don't ACT like anything that you aren't.
Don't make the entire focus her, that makes women uncomfortable.
Don't try to buy her affection.
Don't listen to her life story, that's a friend's job, not a lover's.
Finally, and most importantly, BE YOURSELF.

Does this girl really know you fancy her? Have you actually said it to her? Because in few months I have heard 3 different guys I've known for years telling me that they have fancied me (really don't know why all of them wanted to tell me now.) Everyone saying, you know how it is...blaablaablaa
NO I DON'T KNOW! I didn't have a slightest idea.
Any guy who becomes friends with a woman just to try to eventually sleep with her is simply using that as a form of manipulation. It's a really unsuccessful form of manipulation, but that's what it is. This is simply an extention of the nice guy syndrome. Guys who act "nice" in order to try to get to a girl. Acting by its very nature is putting up a front that is not representative what the person is truly like. That's called "deception". Deception is a form of manipulation. How many women are attracted to manipulation?

If your (or anyone else's) wife is less interested in sex after marriage, then one of two things happened.

1. You got played by someone who wanted something other then you.
2. You're not making things interesting, like they were when you were dating.
interesting...

just so i know what is your angle...are you a Wife or a husband...

are you telling me from first hand experience?

Any guy who becomes friends with a woman just to try to eventually sleep with her is simply using that as a form of manipulation. It's a really unsuccessful form of manipulation, but that's what it is. This is simply an extention of the nice guy syndrome. Guys who act "nice" in order to try to get to a girl. Acting by its very nature is putting up a front that is not representative what the person is truly like. That's called "deception". Deception is a form of manipulation. How many women are attracted to manipulation?

ok this is a question to all (women). my thinking (and that of a few of my friends... blokes btw) is that for a man to go up to a woman, in a bar, say, and chat her up simply (and openly) for the purpose of getting laid is surley insulting and derogatory to the woman? is this true? do women really prefer a stranger to meet them in the club, openly seduce and try and get laid (that night or, if not, soon), or would women prefer to grow a relationship out of friendship? does it change with the woman? myself and my friends think the latter - largely as the former is ultimatley shallow and, in a way, insulting to both the man and the woman.
i act "nice", but not just to get to a girl - i try to act 'nice' to everybody. if i like a girl, and would like our relationship to go further (as with one particularily lovely girl on my course...) i won't treat her with any less (or more) respect than i do everybody. i do try and not 'manipulate' things - or myself - by pretending to be something i'm not. don't get me wrong, im not gonna make no effort at all, but i would like her to like me for myself. is that a really really stupid stance to take?? :confused:

Wow, You're all still debating. A thread with this much posts usely end up being... "random".

somebody answer my question damnit... (http://forums2.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=8163523&postcount=150)

...do women really prefer a stranger to meet them in the club, openly seduce and try and get laid (that night or, if not, soon), or would women prefer to grow a relationship out of friendship? I dont know...Im not a gurl...

And if i was...I would want it all...a few Spicy good looking lovers...and plenty of nice helpfull Friends (Just friends,nothing else).

ok this is a question to all (women). my thinking (and that of a few of my friends... blokes btw) is that for a man to go up to a woman, in a bar, say, and chat her up simply (and openly) for the purpose of getting laid is surley insulting and derogatory to the woman? is this true? do women really prefer a stranger to meet them in the club, openly seduce and try and get laid (that night or, if not, soon), or would women prefer to grow a relationship out of friendship? does it change with the woman? myself and my friends think the latter - largely as the former is ultimatley shallow and, in a way, insulting to both the man and the woman.
i act "nice", but not just to get to a girl - i try to act 'nice' to everybody. if i like a girl, and would like our relationship to go further (as with one particularily lovely girl on my course...) i won't treat her with any less (or more) respect than i do everybody. i do try and not 'manipulate' things - or myself - by pretending to be something i'm not. don't get me wrong, im not gonna make no effort at all, but i would like her to like me for myself. is that a really really stupid stance to take?? :confused:
I don't think so.

I'd feel like crap if a guy just came up to me and made it obvious that he only wants to have sex with me. I mean, does he think I'm a hooker?!?

Besides, I find talking with a guy - with a little flirting here and there, as well as a whole bunch of interesting conversation - to be really sexy.

Foreplay isn't just something that happens once your clothes are off...

interesting...

just so i know what is your angle...are you a Wife or a husband...

are you telling me from first hand experience?
Yes.

If your (or anyone else's) wife is less interested in sex after marriage, then one of two things happened.

1. You got played by someone who wanted something other then you.

2. You're not making things interesting, like they were when you were dating.
and how did you deal with it?

ok this is a question to all (women). my thinking (and that of a few of my friends... blokes btw) is that for a man to go up to a woman, in a bar, say, and chat her up simply (and openly) for the purpose of getting laid is surley insulting and derogatory to the woman? is this true? do women really prefer a stranger to meet them in the club, openly seduce and try and get laid (that night or, if not, soon), or would women prefer to grow a relationship out of friendship? does it change with the woman? myself and my friends think the latter - largely as the former is ultimatley shallow and, in a way, insulting to both the man and the woman.
i act "nice", but not just to get to a girl - i try to act 'nice' to everybody. if i like a girl, and would like our relationship to go further (as with one particularily lovely girl on my course...) i won't treat her with any less (or more) respect than i do everybody. i do try and not 'manipulate' things - or myself - by pretending to be something i'm not. don't get me wrong, im not gonna make no effort at all, but i would like her to like me for myself. is that a really really stupid stance to take?? :confused:
If you're talking to a woman, as long as you are acting like yourself, you'll do find. If you are acting in a way that is not congruous to who you really are, it that comes off that you are not being truthful somehow. That you have a hidden agenda.

As far as "trying to get laid" goes. For men, sexual attraction is binary. You're either sexually attracted or not, there is almost no in between. It's either yes or no. For women, sexual attraction is more like a volume knob. You have to slowly turn that knob up until she feels that it's OK to have sex. It's fine if she knows your motives, but you have to walk with her through the whole process of turning that knob up. The way you turn that knob is to make her feel something, and keep your cool.

Women are emotional creatures. The worst feeling a woman can have for you is apathy. As long as you make her feel SOMETHING, you will stand out and she will pay attention to you.

To keep your cool, all you have to do is not act insecure. Women will test you to see if you really are cool, or if you're just faking it. If she says something like, "You're a jerk," she wants to see if you're going to appologize, flip out or give some sort of cool response. A cool response would be something like giving a half smile and saying something like, "Thanks for noticing."

If you're "acting" nice, and turning the conversation and all your focus directly on the woman, that's a sign of insecurity and neediness. You're not confident enough to just talk to her like she's one of your friends. It's also showing that you desperately want her attention and approval. If you need someone else's approval, what does that say about your self worth?

If you're talking to a woman, as long as you are acting like yourself, you'll do find. If you are acting in a way that is not congruous to who you really are, it that comes off that you are not being truthful somehow. That you have a hidden agenda.

I've tried that. When you're me, it fails abysmally

If you're "acting" nice, and turning the conversation and all your focus directly on the woman, that's a sign of insecurity and neediness. You're not confident enough to just talk to her like she's one of your friends. It's also showing that you desperately want her attention and approval. If you need someone else's approval, what does that say about your self worth?

Again, I've tried doing that, and it's failed totally.

Conclusion: I'll be voting for George W Bush before I find a girlfriend. Keep in mind that as an Australian, I can't vote for Bush.

I've tried that. When you're me, it fails abysmally



Again, I've tried doing that, and it's failed totally.

Conclusion: I'll be voting for George W Bush before I find a girlfriend. Keep in mind that as an Australian, I can't vote for Bush.
That's your problem, you don't sound like you have self worth. Try talking to a random woman just for the sake of having a fun conversation. Go into it thinking something like, "I don't want her number, I just want to have a couple of laughs." You can't fake it either. If you think that, but don't believe it, then you have an alterior motive. If she offers you her number, don't take it. Practice talking to a bunch of women. Eventually you'll become comfortable with the idea, and you'll be turning down the numbers you're offered.

thats great. i am a female. and i aint young, kiddo.

could you clarify if that is agreeing or disagreeing, because I am having trouble understandin if thats a compliment or insult.

ok this is a question to all (women). my thinking (and that of a few of my friends... blokes btw) is that for a man to go up to a woman, in a bar, say, and chat her up simply (and openly) for the purpose of getting laid is surley insulting and derogatory to the woman? is this true? do women really prefer a stranger to meet them in the club, openly seduce and try and get laid (that night or, if not, soon), or would women prefer to grow a relationship out of friendship? does it change with the woman? myself and my friends think the latter - largely as the former is ultimatley shallow and, in a way, insulting to both the man and the woman.
i act "nice", but not just to get to a girl - i try to act 'nice' to everybody. if i like a girl, and would like our relationship to go further (as with one particularily lovely girl on my course...) i won't treat her with any less (or more) respect than i do everybody. i do try and not 'manipulate' things - or myself - by pretending to be something i'm not. don't get me wrong, im not gonna make no effort at all, but i would like her to like me for myself. is that a really really stupid stance to take?? :confused:
That's how I had my 'bad experience' but no I wouldn't expect a bf from a club...unless we were both working there. I don't know if a pub is different...

That's how I had my 'bad experience' but no I wouldn't expect a bf from a club...unless we were both working there. I don't know if a pub is different...pub is like the club
....either for fun ... casual flirting... one niter-love etc...

'bad experience' ...how come?

That's your problem, you don't sound like you have self worth. Try talking to a random woman just for the sake of having a fun conversation. Go into it thinking something like, "I don't want her number, I just want to have a couple of laughs." You can't fake it either. If you think that, but don't believe it, then you have an alterior motive. If she offers you her number, don't take it. Practice talking to a bunch of women. Eventually you'll become comfortable with the idea, and you'll be turning down the numbers you're offered.

Can't. Have proven to be incapable of faking something like that.

ok this is a question to all (women). my thinking (and that of a few of my friends... blokes btw) is that for a man to go up to a woman, in a bar, say, and chat her up simply (and openly) for the purpose of getting laid is surley insulting and derogatory to the woman? is this true?
I wouldn't be insulted. This bloke would like to have sex with me, I think that's a compliment, not an insult. But of course I'd turn him down because I'm not interested of one night stands. At least he's honest and there are many girls who like to have sex with random partners.


do women really prefer a stranger to meet them in the club, openly seduce and try and get laid (that night or, if not, soon), or would women prefer to grow a relationship out of friendship? does it change with the woman? myself and my friends think the latter - largely as the former is ultimatley shallow and, in a way, insulting to both the man and the woman.

Getting laid and getting to know someone is two completely different things. You can't really compare those. People may want sex with stranges between relationships and when they are open about it (not trying to get someone fall in love with you) I think that's fine. Of course it's shallow but if both want it, so what.

i act "nice", but not just to get to a girl - i try to act 'nice' to everybody. if i like a girl, and would like our relationship to go further (as with one particularily lovely girl on my course...) i won't treat her with any less (or more) respect than i do everybody. i do try and not 'manipulate' things - or myself - by pretending to be something i'm not. don't get me wrong, im not gonna make no effort at all, but i would like her to like me for myself. is that a really really stupid stance to take?? :confused:
That's exactly what you should do. Two thumbs up! :)

edit: I just realised two of my ex-boyfriends were complete strangers who started to chat with me in a pub...The other relationship lasted 3 years the other one ended because I moved out of the country... So chatting with a stranger can end up in many ways. :)

To keep your cool, all you have to do is not act insecure. Women will test you to see if you really are cool, or if you're just faking it. If she says something like, "You're a jerk," she wants to see if you're going to appologize, flip out or give some sort of cool response. A cool response would be something like giving a half smile and saying something like, "Thanks for noticing."
<snip>
If you need someone else's approval, what does that say about your self worth?
surley acting "cool" is just as bad as 'acting nice' in the sense that you're faking it?
oh and, yeah, what self-worth?

edit:
That's exactly what you should do. Two thumbs up! :)

yay me :p

surley acting "cool" is just as bad as 'acting nice' in the sense that you're faking it?
oh and, yeah, what self-worth?
Acting cool is a way of acting normal around women. Men tend to act a certain way around their friends that they know well and get along with. Yet, men tend to act TOTALLY different around women. If you just cool out and act like you do around your friends, you'll be a much more enjoyable person for women to be around. Acting weird gives women the creeps, and it shows insecurity and neediness. Women HATE it when guys act needy. They get plenty of that and don't need yet another needy guy trying to hang around them.

Acting cool is a way of acting normal around women. Men tend to act a certain way around their friends that they know well and get along with. Yet, men tend to act TOTALLY different around women. If you just cool out and act like you do around your friends, you'll be a much more enjoyable person for women to be around. Acting weird gives women the creeps, and it shows insecurity and neediness. Women HATE it when guys act needy. They get plenty of that and don't need yet another needy guy trying to hang around them.
ok, acting cool = being normal.
i was taking 'acting cool' as actually trying to be cool - cool remarks or phrases or answers to questions, or whatever:

Women will test you to see if you really are cool, or if you're just faking it. If she says something like, "You're a jerk," she wants to see if you're going to appologize, flip out or give some sort of cool response. A cool response would be something like giving a half smile and saying something like, "Thanks for noticing."
see i don't do "cool responces" like that, and wouldn't start doing them to try to act cool. but i get the message: just be yourself (just so long as you're not insecure, or needy and are self-confident ;) )

ok, acting cool = being normal.
i was taking 'acting cool' as actually trying to be cool - cool remarks or phrases or answers to questions, or whatever:


see i don't do "cool responces" like that, and wouldn't start doing them to try to act cool. but i get the message: just be yourself (just so long as you're not insecure, or needy and are self-confident ;) )
Cool responses don't have to be witty, clever and unique, just relaxed. If you become emotional, then you've lost your cool and you just failed the test. What would you do if your little bratty sister called you a jerk? Most any response in that general frame of mind will garner a positive reaction.

What I hate is that men expect the opposite from girls. I act no differently around guys normally than I do around girls, especially online, and I end up as a 'sister' to them, someone they can confess to, ask about women in general so they know how to talk to their gfs etc.

About my 'bad experience' it wasn't so bad...but I don't particularaly like having stalkers personally.

I'm a noob when it comes to women, so despite any positives I have going for me I'm doomed to being single.

At least I like myself :) ::cries::