NationStates Jolt Archive

That's it. No rules, no time limits. Six deities, prophets, erm... paths, go in, only one comes out.

Krishna...

S/he is used to rumbles....

Krishna. He slew demons like there was no tomorrow.

none of the above?

Krishna...

S/he is used to rumbles....

Experience counts. Krishna (unless Shiva showed up)

In a free for all who would win?

Well if all are free then all win ;-)

Yeah. Krishna. I also reckon Moses would be handy in a fight. 40 years in a desert, that's hardcore.

Yeah. Krishna. I also reckon Moses would be handy in a fight. 40 years in a desert, that's hardcore.

LOLOL!!!!!

none of the above?
You mean they all defeat each other and there's no winner?

Jesus unleashes a massive bucket of water->wine and gets everyone drunk, except muhammed, who does't drink. At which point Jesus whips out some Kung-Fu and puts Muhammed on ice.

NONE! None of em represent my religion... so none! Set would win....

none of the above?
i agree.you want toughness, look at those norse gods.

Jesus is the only real God. The others are demons trying to trick you.

Jesus is the only real God. The others are demons trying to trick you.
Nobody asked who's a real God or not. The question is who would win in a fight.

i agree.you want toughness, look at those norse gods.
They're not in this fight. They will have their own. Who do you think would win in this fight?

i agree.you want toughness, look at those norse gods.
Ooh!
YES!!!

i agree.you want toughness, look at those norse gods.

Norse Gods aren't all that. They're just Greco-Roman gods on steroids. I say it's cheating.

GAH! I'm tired of christians (mainly) saying that all other religions are wrong... We Pagans (the majority) don't go around criticizing other unless they do to us.... than we have a right to...

Shub Niggurath, the goat with a thousand young. Which one of them's gonna stand up to an army of angry tentacled monsters?

Shub Niggurath, the goat with a thousand young. Which one of them's gonna stand up to an army of angry tentacled monsters?
Ooh, the Elder Gods are always a good choice...

None for there would be no fight.

They'd all probably sit and have a good cuppajoe and wonder why all us silly humans cant figure it out something so simple....

The Toa wouldn't win, but it wouldn't lose either, it would master all by non-fighting, you see the truth.

Shub Niggurath, the goat with a thousand young. Which one of them's gonna stand up to an army of angry tentacled monsters?

Moses would. He'd fight for 40 years if nessecary, that's stamina. He's my new role model. I wanna be just like him and.......walk around a desert for 40 years. Damn. Someone give me a new prophet/deity to be my role model. One who had an easy life.

Jesus is the only real God. The others are demons trying to trick you.

Maybe this Jesus character is a demon as well!

Maybe this Jesus character is a demon as well!

Nah. Jesus was a carpenter Says so in that book. The one with the stories and depressing lack of pictures.

Ok, the Norse gods are in the "What team will win?" thread. And if there's a mod around here that can take a look at my note in that thread, I'd appreciate it.

I wanna see set and lugh fight.... i wonder who'd win?!?!?!?

Buddha would win. But not the whiny little skinny one, or the girlish indian one, the big fat happy chinese one. He looks like he could kick anyone's ass.

I wanna see set and lugh fight.... i wonder who'd win?!?!?!?

Set would.

I have no idea who either of them are. I'm a mainstream religonerer (Not a real word.).

Nah. Jesus was a carpenter Says so in that book. The one with the stories and depressing lack of pictures.

You mean the big book of morals? The one of completely false stories? The one which was written in for centuries by kings, noble men, etc.? The one which the romans used as a way to try and control the masses? When they had them destroy many of our Temples, Librarys, Etc.?

Buddha would win. But not the whiny little skinny one, or the girlish indian one, the big fat happy chinese one. He looks like he could kick anyone's ass.

Buddha (Hard 'D' version) wouldn't win anything. However Buddha (Soft 'D' one) is all kinds of ass kickery.

Taoism doesn't really have a main god

Buddha would win. But not the whiny little skinny one, or the girlish indian one, the big fat happy chinese one. He looks like he could kick anyone's ass.
Didn't Chinese Buddhists come up with Kung Fu? That's certainly a point in your favor, but Shub Niggurath would still kick his ass, and eat him for good measure.

Buddha would win. But not the whiny little skinny one, or the girlish indian one, the big fat happy chinese one. He looks like he could kick anyone's ass.
Ooh!
He might make a good sumo wrestler.

Taoism doesn't really have a main god

Sure it does. It just doesn't focus on it.

Look at it this way. Christ saw a whole bunch of people getting all bogged down in the minutea of how to worship the big daddy in the sky that they were forgetting all about how to live. Priests were worried more about temple taxes than loving the creator and no one was trying to help keep society from falling apart.

So he took a good hard look at it and said "this whole kosher business and divinly inspired hairstyles is a load of shit. If you want to get this whole "goodness" thing down just try to look out for each other and don't go thinking that some people are more important than others. If you're getting mad at peole, you've probably got it wrong. Except if those people are bankers or hypocritical amoral preachers, even I can't keep from getting mad at them."

Lao Tzu did pretty much the same thing with chinese folk religions. He pointed out to people that instead of just making sacrifices to keep the river dragon from flooding or drying up, maybe it's more important to worry about how you'll deal with it if the river does flood or dry up.

It doesn't go into much detail about those Gods because china had so many of those that there wasn't much point in providing a laundry list of rituals to worship each of them. Christ didn't have to worry about accounting for other gods because he was mostly talking to Jews about universal morality in terms of the God that only they worshipped.

Besides, your parents will teach you those and they're all pretty much along the lines of "hi god's name here I'm gonna get your attention with some sort of banging noise (bells, drums, or fireworks) and then burn or break something that I think you'd like so that you can keep its spirit self. Would you mind doing me a favor?"

All that it would take for taoism to be exactly like Christianity would be for a small village somewhere to decide that their local pond spirit of water and mercy is the best and that any who don't elevate him above all others, including the emperor, aught to be killed in some grisly and painful fashion so that all may learn the beauty of his gentle watery mercy.

Didn't Chinese Buddhists come up with Kung Fu? That's certainly a point in your favor, but Shub Niggurath would still kick his ass, and eat him for good measure.

I don't know, there is a chinese restaurant I go to with his statue outside. He looks like he could be pretty hard. It's a good job he's so happy.

Moses would. He'd fight for 40 years if nessecary, that's stamina. He's my new role model. I wanna be just like him and.......walk around a desert for 40 years. Damn. Someone give me a new prophet/deity to be my role model. One who had an easy life.

Moses was a pretty hardcore religious figure, but if you want a real old testament juggernaut, check out Joshua. While Moses pretty much invented the whole "Curse of Destruction to the entire middle east" idea, Joshua finished off what Moses started.

Sure, Moses has the respective butcheries of the Aradites, Amorites, Midianites, Bashanites and so on under his belt, I'm pretty sure Joshua's kill count was far more impressive. He put the curse of destruction on the various peoples of Hazor, Makkedah, Hebron, Libnah, Jericho, Lachish, Eglon, the list is endless. For those unversed in Bible slaughter, the COD(Curse of Destruction) involves putting to death every man, woman, child and animal in the designated area, and then pillaging it.

Joshua could kick Jesus's ass any day. I mean come on, how many kingdoms did Jesus destroy and loot?

Jesus

He'd take a rock-hard loaf of bread, turn that one loaf into a thousand loaves, and pelt the rest of them with the loaves.

I don't know, there is a chinese restaurant I go to with his statue outside. He looks like he could be pretty hard. It's a good job he's so happy.
He'd be up against an immense creature composed of tentacles, eyes and devouring mouths with an army of it's young to back it up. Sorry, even Buddah with Kung Fu grip wouldn't stand a chance against that.

These guys are no matches for Khorne, the Blood God.

Blood for the Blood God, skulls for his throne!

You mean the big book of morals? The one of completely false stories? The one which was written in for centuries by kings, noble men, etc.? The one which the romans used as a way to try and control the masses? When they had them destroy many of our Temples, Librarys, Etc.?

Yeah. Might be it. Is it long?. With no pictures?.

Moses was a pretty hardcore religious figure, but if you want a real old testament juggernaut, check out Joshua. While Moses pretty much invented the whole "Curse of Destruction to the entire middle east" idea, Joshua finished off what Moses started.

Sure, Moses has the respective butcheries of the Aradites, Amorites, Midianites, Bashanites and so on under his belt, I'm pretty sure Joshua's kill count was far more impressive. He put the curse of destruction on the various peoples of Hazor, Makkedah, Hebron, Libnah, Jericho, Lachish, Eglon, the list is endless. For those unversed in Bible slaughter, the COD(Curse of Destruction) involves putting to death every man, woman, child and animal in the designated area, and then pillaging it.

Joshua could kick Jesus's ass any day. I mean come on, how many kingdoms did Jesus destroy and loot?


Most people in the old testament ruled. God was vengeful back then. It's why I like Jews. And Joshua sounds like he could kick ass. Still looking for someone who had it easy though.

He'd be up against an immense creature composed of tentacles, eyes and devouring mouths with an army of it's young to back it up. Sorry, even Buddah with Kung Fu grip wouldn't stand a chance against that.

Dude, he would so get pissed and belly slam anything out of his way, Then he would finish with a "big splash" on his now prostrate opponent, crushing it to death,

I'm telling you, don't mess with the "B" man.

Dude, he would so get pissed and belly slam anything out of his way, Then he would finish with a "big splash" on his now prostrate opponent, crushing it to death,

I'm telling you, don't mess with the "B" man.
No, I'm telling you. My imaginary friend can beat up your imaginary friend.

Is Jesus...

In a frigign' TANK?
He'd win in that case.

Jesus would win because he's the son of God.

Most people in the old testament ruled. God was vengeful back then. It's why I like Jews. And Joshua sounds like he could kick ass. Still looking for someone who had it easy though.

Well, the destruction of sodom and the death of his wife aside, Lot had a pretty easy life after that. He lived in the mountains and had sexual relations with both of his daughters.

this is a toughie considering most of the choices are passivists

Buddha would win because he is a pacifist and everyone else would kill each other while he just sat there eating noodles or something

well, since they all represent the different facets/ fragments/ factions of our human mind/ culture/ conditions, yet are all of one divine nature/ source, which the human mind is still grasping to comprehend... then, i would say as soon as the human species is united (through heart) and of one mind-set, working towards the greater good of the whole, then all of the deities above would win.

all buddah have to do is sit on everyone.

Jesus has the god head so... prolly has the edge daddy might rain down whoop ass soddem and gemora style. krishna is a god but beeing one of many dosent equal up to the God who only needs himself to run the universe.

well, since they all represent the different facets/ fragments/ factions of our human mind/ culture/ conditions, yet are all of one divine nature/ source, which the human mind is still grasping to comprehend... then, i would say as soon as the human species is united (through heart) and of one mind-set, working towards the greater good of the whole, then all of the deities above would win.

Not that deep a question. Calm the hell down.

Buddha would win because he is a pacifist and everyone else would kill each other while he just sat there eating noodles or something

Jesus is also a pacifist

Jesus would win because he's the son of God.
But Krishna is the incarnation of God!

None of the above, Fenrir would own everyone.

Jesus is also a pacifist
well Buddha would still win because he is fat and wouldn't share his noodles with jesus and then either Buddha farts and Jesus dies from that, or since Buddha wouldn't share his noodles Jesus would die of starvation after a while.

None of the above, Fenrir would own everyone.
Fenrir was too stupid to realize that the nordic gods cheated him.^^

well Buddha would still win because he is fat and wouldn't share his noodles with jesus and then either Buddha farts and Jesus dies from that, or since Buddha wouldn't share his noodles Jesus would die of starvation after a while.
true :D

But Krishna is the incarnation of God!
So is Buddha.

http://img235.exs.cx/img235/7200/rf1232in.jpg

Well, if we go by the "Black And White (A video game in which you control a god) Principle" the deity with more believers wins. Thus, Jesus prevails. And he turns them into bread. Nya.

Fenrir was too stupid to realize that the nordic gods cheated him.^^

At least he got a hand out of it.

Buddha/Krishna being incarnations of God are nothing to actually being God. Like Jesus.

And on another note, what exactly is the Cosmic Cow, seeing as it has 20% of the vote?