NationStates Jolt Archive

You know you're a right winger when...


1. You still seem to think there's a link between Al Quaida and Iraq.


2. You're pro-life, except in the case of capital punishment of course.


3. You hate art, music, or anything "hippy" unless it can be bought and sold as a commodity.


4. You'd rather have your tax dollars go towards blowing people up, rather than helping the less fortunate in your own community. (Single moms can go to hell)


5. When people try to discuss the current administration with you, your face becomes red, you raise your voice and use the words: "Pinko!" and "Communist!" repeatedly.


6. You think Ann Coulter is a somewhat conservative, gutsy lady and an intelligent individual.


7. You think gay people are evil. (possibly sent by the devil)


8. You're still not clear about what exactly was wrong with condemning people who can't afford healthcare.


9. Your parents paid for you to go to an expensive private college and five years later you're still an asshole.


10. You don't like the sight of two guys holding hands. That REALLY gets you going.

(I'm sorry I couldnt resist)
EDIT: Just so we're clear, these are not meant to be factual, this is simply a list of stupid generalizations mocking the thread "You know you're liberal if..."

11. You score on a one-timer from the center.

Meh, seen it all before.

Meh, seen it all before.

Multiple times. :(

Just another side to the story... In response to the "you know you're a liberal if.." thread.

Come on, man. Is that the best you've got? :D

If you can say 'mean' things and no one bats an eye lid in surprise.

If you enjoying eating babies with a side of bacon, while dumping nuclear waste in your back yard, and torturing innocent people at the same time. :rolleyes:

Just another side to the story... In response to the "you know you're a liberal if.." thread.

There's already one for conservatives. Why start another?

Multiple times. :(

*waits for us to be called Neo-conservative reactionary christian gun-nuts for not laughing at a thread poking fun at right-wingers*

*waits for us to be called Neo-conservative reactionary christian gun-nuts for not laughing at a thread poking fun at right-wingers*
You neo-conservative reactionary Christian gun nuts.

Feel better?

*waits for us to be called Neo-conservative reactionary christian gun-nuts for not laughing at a thread poking fun at right-wingers*
If you would like your pompous conservative ego to be stroked, don't look at me for it. I'm not one of those "crazy" liberals that likes to rant about such things.

You neo-conservative reactionary Christian gun nuts.

Feel better?

In a sexual sort of way.

If you would like your pompous conservative ego to be stroked, don't look at me for it. I'm not one of those "crazy" liberals that likes to rant about such things.

I'm not sure if this is sarcasm or if you're serious, so I'll just reply by abruptly ending my po

In a sexual sort of way.


Ooh, a sexy right-winger :fluffle:

If you would like your pompous conservative ego to be stroked, don't look at me for it. I'm not one of those "crazy" liberals that likes to rant about such things.

You apparently missed the fact that NG is a Libertarian and my politics are best described as unusual.

yep that describes me, i'm a right wing guy :)

here is to the democrats: :sniper:
you know when your a democrat when..

You're against capital punsihment but insist on abortion on demand.

Gay rights parades showing bestiality is covered under free speech, yet the ten commandments in court or a manger scene in a church frontyard aren't accpetable.

Your childs' 4th grade teacher isn't qualified to teach reading, but is qualified to teach sex ed.

You know your a Democrat when you no longer have a sense of humor.

You know your a democrat when your on the side of the criminal and not the victim.

you know your a democrat when you are more than willing to take a mans hard earned money and give to people who don't want to work.

You apparently missed the fact that NG is a Libertarian and my politics are best described as unusual.
To be fair, he (quite literally) asked for it. I'm relatively new I was unaware of his politics in other threads.

yep that describes me, i'm a right wing guy :)

here is to the democrats: :sniper:
you know when your a democrat when..

You know that there is a thread for this....

Gay rights parades showing bestiality is covered under free speech, yet the ten commandments in court or a manger scene in a church frontyard aren't accpetable.

Your comparing apples and carrots

yep that describes me, i'm a right wing guy :)

here is to the democrats: :sniper:
you know when your a democrat when..

You're against capital punsihment but insist on abortion on demand.

Yep, haven't quite seen an argument that shows why these two are contradictory.

Gay rights parades showing bestiality is covered under free speech, yet the ten commandments in court or a manger scene in a church frontyard aren't accpetable.

Beastiality? Do people really fuck animals in the parades, I have never seen one, but I can hardly believe this.

Nativity scenes are perfectly acceptable on church property, putting the ten commandments in the courthouse is a violation of my religious rights.

Your childs' 4th grade teacher isn't qualified to teach reading, but is qualified to teach sex ed.

First off, why are they not qualified to teach reading, and what schools teach sex ed in 4th grade. If you want to talk about Junior High, I would say that the reading skills should already be there and sex is very new to the kids, so I would say that Sex Ed. would be more important.

You know your a Democrat when you no longer have a sense of humor.

I have a pretty decent sense of humor, this just isn't funny.

You know your a democrat when your on the side of the criminal and not the victim.

Now you are just using empty rhetoric.

you know your a democrat when you are more than willing to take a mans hard earned money and give to people who don't want to work.

The people who actually do work hard for their money are the people who I want to help. The people who you want to help are those who no longer have to work hard. If the CEO has to lose 5% of his salary so that the factory workers make 15% more, I say so be it.

Meh. I'm bored.

1. Yes, I think that there is a link between Iraq and "Al Quaida". Present tense. Not past tense.

2. I am pro-life. I am anti-abortion, anti-euthenasia and anti-capital punishment.

3. I happen to like art and music, and I deny that it has to be "hippy" to qualify. I also fail to see why art loses its artsiness if it is bought and sold.

4. I prefer the cause of improving the lives of the poor and neglected to the cause of war. However, it's been my experience that private organizations do a better job in helping people than the government.

5. I generally try to avoid talking about the current American administration IRL. Too many people get red faced.

6. I think Ann Coulter is a gutsy and intelligent woman. I don't, however, believe she is a nice lady.

7. I think that all people are evil, regardless of sexual orientation.

8. I don't like the current state of health care in the United States. However, I don't think that yet another large government program will magically solve the problem. I do think we need some European-style tort law before we can try European-style health insurance.

9. My parents, the federal government, a few private organizations and I paid for six years of private college. And I grew into a very wonderful person, thank you.

10. I like the sight of two men holding hands. Or two women. Or a man and a woman. Or a bunch of them in a circle. Heads bowed. Eyes closed. Any time two or three are gathered in his name.

Meh. I'm bored.

Cheers to boredom. I'm glad you don't fit into the typical "right-wing" stereotype. This thread was only mocking the ridiculous generalizations made in another thread, I don't actually hate all those with conservative views.

"You know you're a right winger when... "

You have the stars and stripes tattoed on your ass.

You have a gun rack in your pickup filled with a variety of guns.

Your name is "Billy Bob," "Joe Bob," "Bubba," or some variant of these.

You think that the Constitution was handed down from God at the same time he presented Moses with the ten commandments.

You think Israel is the home of God's chosen people.

You attend church everytime the doors open.

You define "liberal" as anyone who disagrees with your postion on anything.

Your favorite hobbies are tractor pulls, NASCAR, beer, the NFL, the ACC, "running the coon dogs," and "plinking" with your semi-automatic assault rifle.

Meh. I'm still bored.

--I'm against capital punishment and abortion on demand.

--While I'm generally for free speech, the public display of acts of beastiality should run afoul of decency laws. Please note that I said public, i.e. for all to see, hard to avoid. The Ten Commandments in a government courtroom sends a bad message, and it's a not a good battle for Christians to get into. Nativity scenes on church property, or any private property, should be Constitutionally protected.

--If your child's teacher is more qualified for, or cares more about, teaching sex ed than teaching reading, then that is a problem no matter what politics you are.

--So two guys walk into a bar. The next guy ducked. ;)

--I am on the side of justice. Crimes should be punished because we need to promote a civil and just society, not so a victim can extract a pound of flesh.

--I am always most in favor of teaching people to work and to give them the skills to find work on their own. The ultimate goal of any effort to help the poor should be to help them become not poor. Punishing them for being poor, in my experience, is counter-productive.

You know you're a conservative when you can believe that the nation should be ruled according to the Bible but conveniently forget the part about wealth being the most certain path AWAY from any Christian ideal of heaven.

You know you're a conservative when you demand that a collection of cells in a woman's womb constitutes life and then, eighteen or nineteen years later, you send that same collection of cells off to kill and die for puerile and insane political or economic reasons.

You know you're a conservative when you want to ban any form of sex education in schools but then refuse to offer care, through welfare or food stamps, for the children conceived by uneducated kids .

You know you're a conservative when you see no irony in demanding that other nations rise to an arbitrary level of human rights while America has the highest per capita prison population on Earth, more than Iran or Russia or China or any other country we are so quick to criticize.

:p

You know you're a right-winger when.. bah, what the hell... *Calls in a bunch of gun weilding, stereotypical, southern, right-wing hicks drunk on capital punishment, war and alcohol who constantly quote bible verses while unloading into the room*

You know you're a right-winger when.. bah, what the hell... *Calls in a bunch of gun weilding, stereotypical, southern, right-wing hicks drunk on capital punishment, war and alcohol who constantly quote bible verses while unloading into the room*

I didn't know that those people could read. How could they quote bible verses if they're illiterate? Unless they just make them up like I do.

Ooh, a sexy right-winger :fluffle:

Hmm. Fluffling with another dude? Seems kinda gay. Meh. :fluffle:

You know you're a right winger when...


1. You still seem to think there's a link between Al Quaida and Iraq.


2. You're pro-life, except in the case of capital punishment of course.


3. You hate art, music, or anything "hippy" unless it can be bought and sold as a commodity.


4. You'd rather have your tax dollars go towards blowing people up, rather than helping the less fortunate in your own community. (Single moms can go to hell)


5. When people try to discuss the current administration with you, your face becomes red, you raise your voice and use the words: "Pinko!" and "Communist!" repeatedly.


6. You think Ann Coulter is a somewhat conservative, gutsy lady and an intelligent individual.


7. You think gay people are evil. (possibly sent by the devil)


8. You're still not clear about what exactly was wrong with condemning people who can't afford healthcare.


9. Your parents paid for you to go to an expensive private college and five years later you're still an asshole.


10. You don't like the sight of two guys holding hands. That REALLY gets you going.

(I'm sorry I couldnt resist)

1.Wrong

2.True, in my case

3.Wrong

4.I'd rather have no tax at all

5.Yes, but only if they're defending, rather than attacking, the administration ;)

6.I think she's an evil bitch!

7.Gays are no better and no worse than straight people; who they love is their own business

8.?

9.(shrugs)

10.Don't really care

Perhaps a better title would be, "You know you're a neoconservative Republicrud when..."

6. I spent a lot of time looking at her book, Slander.

I can't find anything inaccurate in it.

You know you're a right-winger when

you can laugh at the hacks that post "you know you're..." stuff because you _know_ you're right.

you can remember why the _Federalist Papers_ are important.

you celebrate the last payment on the NRA Easy-Pay life membership.

you realize the cost of college has nothing to do with how big an asshole you are.

you hate the idea that you are forced to pay for art, music, and anything _hippy_ just because some left-wing boob in the city council thinks the town square needs a statute.

you realize that the easiest way to point out a government building when giving directions is to refer to that _hideous statue_ out in front.

you realize that people should be responsible for themselves and that keeping them happy, healthy, and employed is not a government job.

you don't mind being called conservative, right-wing, or neo-con because names don't hurt.

That's enough for now.

Ooh, a sexy right-winger :fluffle:
Ann Coulter. BIG jk. :D

You know you're a conservative when you can believe that the nation should be ruled according to the Bible but conveniently forget the part about wealth being the most certain path AWAY from any Christian ideal of heaven.

You know you're a conservative when you demand that a collection of cells in a woman's womb constitutes life and then, eighteen or nineteen years later, you send that same collection of cells off to kill and die for puerile and insane political or economic reasons.

You know you're a conservative when you want to ban any form of sex education in schools but then refuse to offer care, through welfare or food stamps, for the children conceived by uneducated kids .

You know you're a conservative when you see no irony in demanding that other nations rise to an arbitrary level of human rights while America has the highest per capita prison population on Earth, more than Iran or Russia or China or any other country we are so quick to criticize.

:p

Um ... the term for purposes of this thread was "right-winger." The terms are not synonymous. :P :P

Okay, replace the word conservative with right-winger, and it's still kinda teh funny.

You're against capital punsihment but insist on abortion on demand.
There's a difference between Pro-Abortion and Pro-Choice
Gay rights parades showing bestiality is covered under free speech, yet the ten commandments in court or a manger scene in a church frontyard aren't accpetable.When was the last time you saw bestiality at a gay rights parade? Ten commandments in court violates a little thing called "separation of church and state". Churches are fine.

Your childs' 4th grade teacher isn't qualified to teach reading, but is qualified to teach sex ed.That's so stupid, I'm not even going to respond.

You know your a Democrat when you no longer have a sense of humor.You know you're a Republican when you say BS like the above. Jon Stewart doesn't have a sense of humor?

You know your a democrat when your on the side of the criminal and not the victim.You know you're a Republican when you think the Bill of Rights should be repealed.

you know your a democrat when you are more than willing to take a mans hard earned money and give to people who don't want to work.
You know you're a Republican when you believe that people without rich parents deserve to starve and die.

7. I think that all people are evil, regardless of sexual orientation.


If all people were evil there would be no such word as good. I think you mean all people are capable of evil.

You know you're a left-winger when you spend most of your time insulting right-wingers.

You know you're a right-winger when you spend most of your time insulting left-wingers.

Really, are they all that different?

Oh yes, and a little post script:

You know you don't care when you begin contemplating suicide as a better choice than putting up with people any longer.

Oh yeah, I forgot this one.

You know you are a right-winger when you understand that more government intervention won't solve the problem that a little government "help" has made worse.

Ten commandments in court violates a little thing called "separation of church and state". Churches are fine.

Nowhere in the constitution does it say "separation of church and state." It says "Congress shall make no law respecting the establishment of a national religion, nor prohibit the free exercise thereof." Showing the Ten Commandments in a court is not establishing a national religion.

You know you're a Republican when you believe that people without rich parents deserve to starve and die.

Show me the part of the constitution that gives the government the power to provide for its citizens.

you realize that people should be responsible for themselves and that keeping them happy, healthy, and employed is not a government job.

Agreed one hundred percent, but if we the people wish for the government to do that, then we must. There's nothing wrong with the government helping out.

By the way, nice sig.

You know you're a republican when your candidate has just won the election.

"You know you're a right winger when... "

You have the stars and stripes tattoed on your ass.

You have a gun rack in your pickup filled with a variety of guns.

Your name is "Billy Bob," "Joe Bob," "Bubba," or some variant of these.

You think that the Constitution was handed down from God at the same time he presented Moses with the ten commandments.

You think Israel is the home of God's chosen people.

You attend church everytime the doors open.

You define "liberal" as anyone who disagrees with your postion on anything.

Your favorite hobbies are tractor pulls, NASCAR, beer, the NFL, the ACC, "running the coon dogs," and "plinking" with your semi-automatic assault rifle.
That's the best list we've had so far, but I don't think it describes "right-winger" so much as just plain ol' redneck.

here is to the democrats: :snip:

This is just bad. I suggest you see the "you know you're a liberal when..." threead for something that is at least marginally better.
6. I spent a lot of time looking at her book, Slander.

I can't find anything inaccurate in it.
I think your fingers accidentally hit the "i" and "n" keys right before you wrote "accurate".

Agreed one hundred percent, but if we the people wish for the government to do that, then we must. There's nothing wrong with the government helping out.

By the way, nice sig.

Thanks. Now if I can only stand my ground when the revenooers come for them.

No. We're bound to live by the Constitution. It says that everyone will have equal opportunity for life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness, not a right to them. If one wants perpertual government handouts, he should find a different country.

Hmm. Fluffling with another dude? Seems kinda gay. Meh. :fluffle:
Well you know that oold navy motto?...

Nowhere in the constitution does it say "separation of church and state." It says "Congress shall make no law respecting the establishment of a national religion, nor prohibit the free exercise thereof." Showing the Ten Commandments in a court is not establishing a national religion.

It promotes religion using both public funds and public lands, and therefore is a government endorsement of religion.

Kill all conservatives! Die bastards die! :gundge: :gundge:


Oh, wait. Doh! [smacks forehead]

:D

It promotes religion using both public funds and public lands, and therefore is a government endorsement of religion.

But if you want to get technical, its not a congressional endorsement. If your going to argue constitutionality on this one, you'll own yourself. I personally think the gov't should try to stay out of religion all together. And I'm a Christian too, imagine that. (paradox insues, the universe implodes) :D

When your smart
patriotic
and good lookin

Right-wing if...
You have a small shrine dedicated to Ronald Reagan in the middle of your lavishly-decorated living room.

You think that he government should stay the hell out of people's lives! (unless, of course, they're homosexual, non Christian, want an abortion, want to use recreational drugs...)

Left-wing
You have a picture of Ronald Reagan in the middle of your dartboard. (Note: does anyone know where I could get one of those? Please?)

Well you know that oold navy motto?...
What,, "Making Jam"?

What,, "Making Jam"?
Well, not what I was thinking about. But whatever floats your boat.

When your smart


Mmmm...irony...

First off, why are they not qualified to teach reading, and what schools teach sex ed in 4th grade.

Mind you, I live in Canada and it's much MUCH different here than it is in the You Ess Eh - but Sex Education WAS taught in my school in 4th grade. Probably still is. And I was in 4th grade nearly 20 years ago.

right-wing·er (rthndd)
adj.

1.
a) Using the right wing more skillfully or easily than the left.
B) Sports. Swinging from the right to the left: a right-winger batter.

2.
a) Done with the right wing.
b) Intended for wear on or use by the right wing: a right-winged pair of scissors.

You know you're a right winger when you have to dig the puck out of the corner and pass it to the center.

You know you're a right winger when you have to dig the puck out of the corner and pass it to the center.
How many of you are in withdrawal over hockey. How many have started watching college and minor league teams?

What??? Hockey players can go to college????

What??? Hockey players can go to college????
LOL. I did that. Turned out that I was really an engineer.

Your name is "Billy Bob," "Joe Bob," "Bubba," or some variant of these.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v508/Calmypal/mandate.jpg

LOL. I did that. Turned out that I was really an engineer.

Clarkson? RPI?

That's the best list we've had so far, but I don't think it describes "right-winger" so much as just plain ol' redneck.

Oh! They're not synonomous? :D

Sorry about that! ;)

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v508/Calmypal/mandate.jpg

Heh! I guess everything is relative, yes? :D

If you truly believe that Fox News is "Fair and Balanced"....

...You might be a Right-Winger.

If you truly believe that Fox News is "Fair and Balanced"....

...You might be a Right-Winger.

With all of the griping about Fox, it's easy to just ingore the problems with CNN-but it's worth noting that unlike Fox, CNN, the network Turner founded, has a record of collaboration with genocidal dictatorship. In April 2003, just after the liberation of Baghdad, CNN's Eason Jordan described the network's relationship with Saddam Hussein's regime:



I knew that CNN could not report that Saddam Hussein's eldest son, Uday, told me in 1995 that he intended to assassinate two of his brothers-in-law who had defected and also the man giving them asylum, King Hussein of Jordan. If we had gone with the story, I was sure he would have responded by killing the Iraqi translator who was the only other participant in the meeting. After all, secret police thugs brutalized even senior officials of the Information Ministry, just to keep them in line (one such official has long been missing all his fingernails).*.*.*.


I came to know several Iraqi officials well enough that they confided in me that Saddam Hussein was a maniac who had to be removed. One Foreign Ministry officer told me of a colleague who, finding out his brother had been executed by the regime, was forced, as a test of loyalty, to write a letter of congratulations on the act to Saddam Hussein. An aide to Uday once told me why he had no front teeth: henchmen had ripped them out with pliers and told him never to wear dentures, so he would always remember the price to be paid for upsetting his boss. Again, we could not broadcast anything these men said to us.



This really looks like bias in CNN by not reporting on substantial problems that they knew to exist in Iraq.