NationStates Jolt Archive

I was talking with some friends about this and was wondering what others thought. If a girl is 16, how old does the guy have to be before it becomes "creepy"?

A good friend of mine (21) is dating a 40 year old guy. Seems very strange to me. Just think about their future: when she's 50 he's 70! Makes me sad, in a way.
With 16, though I'd say he shouldn't be over 20...or not a lot at least.

I'd say no more than 3 or 4 years older if the girls only 16....

However, the acceptable difference increases as the girl gets older, I think.

Yay, another Mancunian. :D

Welcome Rasselas.

Yay, another Mancunian. :D

Welcome Rasselas.
Yay! :fluffle:

What are you doing in liverpool?!:P

Yay! :fluffle:

What are you doing in liverpool?!:P
I'm lost.

Really though. A degree in History and Politics

:fluffle:

it does depend on the maturity of the people involved but in general a 16 year old shouldnt date anyone out of highschool. the expectations of a true adult include things that a 16 year old cant usually handle. not to mention that the younger one is too easy to manipulate into doing things s/he normally wouldnt.

isn't the rule half the guys age + 7 = acceptable girls age? so the guy shouldn't be much older than 18

Speaking as a 34 year old I don't think I could bring myself to date anyone uder 18 anyway, so the expectation for anyone under 18 to want to date someone my age isn't really there. Having said that, when I was 18 I dated a 24 year old which some of my friends thought was great and others thought was just weird. But then my uncle is 57 and his (relatively) new wife is 36. No one seems to bat an eyelid because they're over the "reasonable" age. Naturally it'd be viewed a lot differently if they were 20 years younger.

At the end of the day, what two consenting adults do is their business.

At the end of the day, what two consenting adults do is their business.
Unless it's gay homo sex!

Well a friend of mine (16) is dating a 24 year old guy...

Normally I might find that a bit creepy, but knowing her... I would say it's probably alright.

It's mostly a case-by-case thing, it depends almost entirely on the people involved.

How about if the girl is 17?

Well a friend of mine (16) is dating a 24 year old guy...

Normally I might find that a bit creepy, but knowing her... I would say it's probably alright.

It's mostly a case-by-case thing, it depends almost entirely on the people involved.
if it were my daughter, id be trying to get the guy tossed into jail

I'd say no more than 3 or 4 years older if the girls only 16....

However, the acceptable difference increases as the girl gets older, I think.

I would have a flying FIT if one of my grandaughters dated anyone more than about a year or two older than them when they're less than 21 years old themselves. I agree with you, however, that when a woman is over 21, the number of years difference can increase.

I can't complain about "dirty old men" though, since when I was 53, I dated a woman 23. Heh! As it turns out, that usually isn't a very good idea. There's just too much of an experience and interest gap to bridge for any long term relationship to be workable, IMHO.

I'd say no more than 3 or 4 years older if the girls only 16....

However, the acceptable difference increases as the girl gets older, I think.
I agree with this guy. Although I think a 16 year old oughta steer clear of a twenty year old.

I always quite like the half age + seven thing.

I don't think age really matters much in the grand scheme of things. Provided 16 is the age of legal consent, I figure she can bloody well do what she wants.

I always quite like the half age + seven thing.

So a 16 year old should only date 15 year olds? :D

16/2+7 = 15

I always quite like the half age + seven thing.

How does that work? Half the older person's age, plus seven years, with the total being the age difference? Hmm. That would mean that at 61, the youngest woman I could date would be 37/38? Not bad, but what if the older person were 21? That would mean he/she could date girls 17/18? Hmm. Probably not too bad, actually.

However, this fails to take in the maturity factor. I've met 23-30 year-olds who had more maturity than 40-45 year-olds. It's a conundrum. :eek:

So long as its outside of the bounds of statutory rape its ok. If its statutory rape there are a few complications, and I would definitely not apporve, but how my friends ruin their lives is only my business in the way that it entertains me.

It is too old when the guy is 10 years old.... I mean the girl is too old.... :fluffle: :headbang: :mp5: :D

So a 16 year old should only date 15 year olds? :D

16/2+7 = 15

For the sake of being consistant I will say yes. But hey, I didn't have a girlfriend when I was 16 So I'm bitter. However see below

How does that work? Half the older person's age, plus seven years, with the total being the age difference? Hmm. That would mean that at 61, the youngest woman I could date would be 37/38? Not bad, but what if the older person were 21? That would mean he/she could date girls 17/18? Hmm. Probably not too bad, actually.

However, this fails to take in the maturity factor. I've met 23-30 year-olds who had more maturity than 40-45 year-olds. It's a conundrum.

Well it is more of a guideline for young adults/old adolescents rather then a rule for everyone.

it does depend on the maturity of the people involved but in general a 16 year old shouldnt date anyone out of highschool. the expectations of a true adult include things that a 16 year old cant usually handle. not to mention that the younger one is too easy to manipulate into doing things s/he normally wouldnt.

I couldnt have said it better myself.

I was talking with some friends about this and was wondering what others thought. If a girl is 16, how old does the guy have to be before it becomes "creepy"?

I'm 16 and the guy I'm like, head over heals for is 35.

OH but he's so hot.

I'm 16 and the guy I'm like, head over heals for is 35.

OH but he's so hot.
:headbang:
you have my age all wrong:D (okay so she doesn't like me, big deal)
:headbang:

I'm 16 and the guy I'm like, head over heals for is 35.

OH but he's so hot.

No no no ... I'm only 32.

I don't think age really matters much in the grand scheme of things. Provided 16 is the age of legal consent, I figure she can bloody well do what she wants.


i think it works something like this: 16-18, consent only for ppl who are 4 years or less older than you. over 18, whatever.
the legal thing i mean.
i think an 18 year old w/ a 38 year old would be weird.

It is too old when the guy is 10 years old.... I mean the girl is too old....
On a more serious note, what if the guy is 15 and the girl is 17? Is that considered too young by the girl?

I'd say no more than 3 or 4 years older if the girls only 16....

However, the acceptable difference increases as the girl gets older, I think.

Very True, No disagreements here! :gundge:

Multiply younger age by 1.12. Thats your answer. 16 max = 18, 13 = 14. I agree.

Well it is more of a guideline for young adults/old adolescents rather then a rule for everyone.

LOL! Now you're equivocating! Don't like the idea of my dating anyone younger than 50? :headbang:

I think people who date much younger people do so because they are immature or looking for control of the relationship. When a twenty-five year old dates a sixteen year old there is too much difference in control. When a sixty year old dates a forty year old, it's not really an issue. While there are some exceptions, this tends to be the way it works.

LOL! Now you're equivocating! Don't like the idea of my dating anyone younger than 50? :headbang:
Ha ha ha.

No I'm not. Could be the time and my lack of sleep [1am GMT + around 8 hours slepp over the course of the weekend] giving that impression though. You can go out with anyone above the legal age (although anything below 20 would be odd, but I have seen odder relationships)

Ha ha ha.

No I'm not. Could be the time and my lack of sleep [1am GMT + around 8 hours slepp over the course of the weekend] giving that impression though. You can go out with anyone above the legal age (although anything below 20 would be odd, but I have seen odder relationships)

Heh! Well, I already raised five children. I have no desire to raise another! :D

Heh! Well, I already raised five children. I have no desire to raise another! :D
Ahh, we're not that bad really.

I think people who date much younger people do so because they are immature or looking for control of the relationship. When a twenty-five year old dates a sixteen year old there is too much difference in control. When a sixty year old dates a forty year old, it's not really an issue. While there are some exceptions, this tends to be the way it works.

I really have no problems dating a woman older than 50, if she's taken good care of herself. The problem from my personal perspective is that I have done a pretty good job of taking care of myself and I'm honestly not attracted to anyone, of whatever age, who hasn't. There are a few unattached older women who have taken good care of themselves, but they're few and far between. :(

I was talking with some friends about this and was wondering what others thought. If a girl is 16, how old does the guy have to be before it becomes "creepy"?

Over 18, if the guy is out of her peer group he is a creep, and i would advise the young lady to keep well away from people like and stick to her own age group until she is old enough to make adult decisions. She is stilla child after all

Ahh, we're not that bad really.

Aww. I know that. That's not what I meant. It's the experience factor, as far as I'm concerned. I meant nothing derogatory. :(

There's a general rule as far as dating ages go... u get the older persons age... half it, and add 7...

So for a 20 year old, the youngest they can dat is 17...
30 yr old.... 22...
100yr old.... 57... etc.

just a basic rule which i think works.

Aww. I know that. That's not what I meant. It's the experience factor, as far as I'm concerned. I meant nothing derogatory. :(
Well 20 is hardly a child. I just dream of a simpler time before essays when all I had to do was play with lego.

:headbang:
you have my age all wrong:D (okay so she doesn't like me, big deal)
:headbang:

aw, i like you. :fluffle:

Unless it's gay homo sex!
alright alright ill say it...stut the fuck up dumb ass ...thank you...

alright alright ill say it...stut the fuck up dumb ass ...thank you...
Clicky! (http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=sarcasm)

Well 20 is hardly a child. I just dream of a simpler time before essays when all I had to do was play with lego.

LOL! Well I'm afraid I can't help you with that. Heh!

I use to daydream about being younger too, but then I realized what an absolute trip it is being my age. I get to do and say pretty much what I want to, since few in their right minds will ( or even CAN ) dispute my right to do so. I have a vast store of experience and training upon which to draw, and I can still run and work out to keep myself in shape. And soon I'll be making enough money to go where and when I want to, with few or no debts. Kewl, eh? :D

What if the guy is 26 and the girl is 16/17, but the girl is extremely hot?

LOL! Well I'm afraid I can't help you with that. Heh!

I use to daydream about being younger too, but then I realized what an absolute trip it is being my age. I get to do and say pretty much what I want to, since few in their right minds will ( or even CAN ) dispute my right to do so. I have a vast store of experience and training upon which to draw, and I can still run and work out to keep myself in shape. And soon I'll be making enough money to go where and when I want to, with few or no debts. Kewl, eh? :D

We really need a jealous smiley :)

What if the guy is 26 and the girl is 16/17, but the girl is extremely hot?
then you meet him at the door with a shotgun

We really need a jealous smiley :)

LOL! Nahh! Not in my case. No need to be jealous of me, my friend. I spend entirely too much time alone and for the next four months or so, I'll still be "robbing Peter to pay Paul." Just a matter of timing. My home will be paid off this year and my net disposable income will go up by about $2,000/month, but until then things are still going to pretty much suck. Still looking toward the future at my age is a plus though, yes? :D

then you meet him at the door with a shotgun

LOL! Probably! My two sons have already set a few guys straight about my two grandaughters. :D

I have a friend who's 22, she's dating a guy who's 31, and I think its kind of shady.. She's always been the dependent type, not too many close friends, and she's finishing school still. He's got a nice house in a nearby rural area, a good job, and no social life to speak of (except her now, I suppose). She spends all her time with him and leaves her other friends behind. He's grown up. His "parties" are at his friend's mother's house. She's 22 and still has alot of growing up to do, alot to learn, and I feel like she's giving up her youth. Obviously its not my business to say anything about it, but does anyone agree/disagree with me? Just curious on reactions..

Clicky! (http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=sarcasm)
Well done, sir! :fluffle:

This is a hard question... I'd say it certainly requires maturity on the part of both people.

I was talking with some friends about this and was wondering what others thought. If a girl is 16, how old does the guy have to be before it becomes "creepy"?
Most areas have a Staturtory Rape Law that ranges from 14-16. Usually the minimum age still has a max age limit. IE Florida a 15 year old can have consentual sex with up to a 24 year old. British Columbia a 14 year old can CS with a 30 year old. Most of North America is somewhere in between.

Personally it is more of a curve 14 upto 2 years, 16 upto 3 years, 20+ upto 5 years. It really does vary based on mental maturity as judged by others in the know not the individual. I have know several "mature" teens, particulairly girls, who personally thought they were old enough and mature enough but were some of the most unpreparred and immature. If you want to know personally check with some adults who know you and your intended victim, err friend. Find someone not immediately related to either of you or who would automaticly say yeah go ahead. Though I suspect that you are the guy and the very fact you are asking tells me you are too old.

I have a friend who's 22, she's dating a guy who's 31, and I think its kind of shady.. She's always been the dependent type, not too many close friends, and she's finishing school still. He's got a nice house in a nearby rural area, a good job, and no social life to speak of (except her now, I suppose). She spends all her time with him and leaves her other friends behind. He's grown up. His "parties" are at his friend's mother's house. She's 22 and still has alot of growing up to do, alot to learn, and I feel like she's giving up her youth. Obviously its not my business to say anything about it, but does anyone agree/disagree with me? Just curious on reactions..

Sounds fine to me with the information given.

Most areas have a Staturtory Rape Law that ranges from 14-16. Usually the minimum age still has a max age limit. IE Florida a 15 year old can have consentual sex with up to a 24 year old. British Columbia a 14 year old can CS with a 30 year old. Most of North America is somewhere in between.

Personally it is more of a curve 14 upto 2 years, 16 upto 3 years, 20+ upto 5 years. It really does vary based on mental maturity as judged by others in the know not the individual. I have know several "mature" teens, particulairly girls, who personally thought they were old enough and mature enough but were some of the most unpreparred and immature. If you want to know personally check with some adults who know you and your intended victim, err friend. Find someone not immediately related to either of you or who would automaticly say yeah go ahead. Though I suspect that you are the guy and the very fact you are asking tells me you are too old.

No its not me. A girl I work with is 17 and she gets many 26+ year old guys (a couple 40+ :eek: ) hitting on her and I was wondering if others thought it was weird. I thought it was, but there are so many that hit on her, I thought it maybe was just me. I'm 21 by the way.

With a girl that young, 16, I don't like them dateing anyone older than a year or two. Actually I don't really like young people dateing at all, because they should be concentrating on their education. Still it is case by case. My daughter met the man she's married to now when she was 16 and he was 25. Well I did get to know him a bit, he's a very good young man. When they told me the age difference I did not break them up, but I told them, 'I don't want any hanky panky to happen until she's at least 18 or out of High School' He said 'Yes Mom!' And indeed nothing happened. They got married about three months after she graduated and they are doing fine, so it all depends. In general a guy that old is not thinking marriage and family when he's seeing a 16 year old, in general it is likely to expose the girl to risks, like being taken to drinking establishments etc. But like I said, it depends.

No its not me. A girl I work with is 17 and she gets many 26+ year old guys (a couple 40+ :eek: ) hitting on her and I was wondering if others thought it was weird. I thought it was, but there are so many that hit on her, I thought it maybe was just me. I'm 21 by the way.

That's just too, too young for her to know her own mind, in most cases. She must be a knockout to get that much attention from older guys. Someone needs to warn her how to fend off the advances. :headbang:

With a girl that young, 16, I don't like them dateing anyone older than a year or two. Actually I don't really like young people dateing at all, because they should be concentrating on their education. Still it is case by case. My daughter met the man she's married to now when she was 16 and he was 25. Well I did get to know him a bit, he's a very good young man. When they told me the age difference I did not break them up, but I told them, 'I don't want any hanky panky to happen until she's at least 18 or out of High School' He said 'Yes Mom!' And indeed nothing happened. They got married about three months after she graduated and they are doing fine, so it all depends. In general a guy that old is not thinking marriage and family when he's seeing a 16 year old, in general it is likely to expose the girl to risks, like being taken to drinking establishments etc. But like I said, it depends.

The fact that he listened to you speaks volumes about his maturity.

If he is over 18, I'd think that was creepy. However, as a rule of thumb, I think it gets a little awkward when a person dates another person old enough to be his/her parent. Of course, the older one is, the less of a problem it is, unless you are Anna Nicole Smith.

That's just too, too young for her to know her own mind, in most cases. She must be a knockout to get that much attention from older guys. Someone needs to warn her how to fend off the advances. :headbang:

Oh yeah, she definitely is. If I was 2-3 years younger, I woulda hit that a while ago. I'll just have to wait another year ;)

She does fend them off though.

isn't the rule half the guys age + 7 = acceptable girls age? so the guy shouldn't be much older than 18
thats true

At the end of the day, what two consenting adults do is their business.
Unless it's gay homo sex!
As opposed to straight homo sex? 'tard.

Sorry, this quote is from page one and not that relevent to whatever people are currently talking about, but it was in my inbox as a reply I had. I found it most amusing that someone thinks straight relationships are "no one's business" but a gay relationship is "everyone's business". I guess Gnostikos just watches way too much porno.

As opposed to straight homo sex? 'tard.
I think the opposite is angry homo sex

Age has zero to do with it. It's all got to do with mental maturity which people don't have until they are 30 hence I propose raising the age of consent to 31.

Age has zero to do with it. It's all got to do with mental maturity which people don't have until they are 30 hence I propose raising the age of consent to 31.
I object.

I object.
Objection ignored. People under 30 are incapable of thinking for themselves. They are very easily taken advantage of. By raising the AOC to 30, we will be protecting them from people who wish to take advantage of them, and we will be correcting for all the hypocrisy in all the state AOC laws. The federal AOC should be 30 and should overrule whatever the states have.

Objection ignored. People under 30 are incapable of thinking for themselves. They are very easily taken advantage of. By raising the AOC to 30, we will be protecting them from people who wish to take advantage of them, and we will be correcting for all the hypocrisy in all the state AOC laws. The federal AOC should be 30 and should overrule whatever the states have.
Then I object again. A little louder this time.

Then I object again. A little louder this time.
What the heck are you objecting to? This is for your own protection.

The idea is make the federal AOC 30 and to make it retroactive all the way back to 1900. That way everyone except me, end up owing jail time for being pedophiles.

What the heck are you objecting to? This is for your own protection.
No, it's not. By raising the AOC to the age of 30 you're not changing anything. If you don't allow people to make mistakes and to learn from their mistakes, then there will still be people who, at the age of 30, are not capable of taking the 'right' decisions. We are not perfect, but we can learn. What you suggest would not make any difference at all, except for the few people who are perfectly capable of taking their own decisions at an earlier age.
Therefore I object to all that you've said. :)

The idea is make the federal AOC 30 and to make it retroactive all the way back to 1900. That way everyone except me, end up owing jail time for being pedophiles.
And that is your view of a more perfect world?

And that is your view of a more perfect world?
No, its about revenge. And it would take all the criminals off the street.

No, its about revenge.
What has the whole world done to you that you need revenge? Is
that (http://www.ebaumsworld.com/moresexthanme.html) it? :p

No, its about revenge. And it would take all the criminals off the street.
There would be no one left on the street!

What has the whole world done to you that you need revenge? Is
that (http://www.ebaumsworld.com/moresexthanme.html) it? :p
No. Cause everyone is my enemy and is conspiring against me.

As opposed to straight homo sex? 'tard.

Sorry, this quote is from page one and not that relevent to whatever people are currently talking about, but it was in my inbox as a reply I had. I found it most amusing that someone thinks straight relationships are "no one's business" but a gay relationship is "everyone's business". I guess Gnostikos just watches way too much porno.
Clicky! (http://forums2.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=8017661&postcount=42)

There would be no one left on the street!
No one except for me. And anyone else who happens to be a virgin too.

No. Cause everyone is my enemy and is conspiring against me.
Oh. Right. And I'm in on that, I almost forgot.
Sorry I have to leave you here, I'm off to conspire some more.
Here, have a :fluffle: , I think you really need it.

Well i'm a 16 year old girl and i think that the acceptable maximum age would be 20. Realistically, after that you are too different and want to do different things, it wouldn't work in the end!!

See, that is why I have to record all of my conversations with people. Cause they are all my enemies. Like that one girl that tried to poison me by slipping something in my drink and then my food a couple of weeks back. She tried to kill me, that makes her my enemy.

Well i'm a 16 year old girl and i think that the acceptable maximum age would be 20. Realistically, after that you are too different and want to do different things, it wouldn't work in the end!!
based on what? stereotypes? see the real problem is that 16 year old girls only think bout sex. They don't think of anything else. Relationships aren't supposed to be about sex. That why you will have many relationships but no marriage lasting more than 2 months.

See, that is why I have to record all of my conversations with people. Cause they are all my enemies. Like that one girl that tried to poison me by slipping something in my drink and then my food a couple of weeks back. She tried to kill me, that makes her my enemy.
Aww, now, don't be so pessimistic, the glass is half full, remember?

based on what? stereotypes? see the real problem is that 16 year old girls only think bout sex. They don't think of anything else. Relationships aren't supposed to be about sex. That why you will have many relationships but no marriage lasting more than 2 months.
how would you know? where are you from, anyways?

First sentence:
based on what? stereotypes?The next sentence:see the real problem is that 16 year old girls only think bout sex. They don't think of anything else.

Mmmmm, Irony.

Aww, now, don't be so pessimistic, the glass is half full, remember?
put it in a glass half the size and then its full

isn't the rule half the guys age + 7 = acceptable girls age? so the guy shouldn't be much older than 18

The half age plus seven rule was/is a muslim rule for the acceptable age of marriage.

put it in a glass half the size and then its full
yay for that. I didn't think there were any optimists left ;)

yay for that. I didn't think there were any optimists left ;)
oh im not an optimist as much as I try to be, im just an Engineer :)

oh im not an optimist as much as I try to be, im just an Engineer :)
That'll work. :)

isn't the rule half the guys age + 7 = acceptable girls age? so the guy shouldn't be much older than 18

so can the girl be older than the guy?

so can the girl be older than the guy?
ever heard of 'the graduate' :D

The half age plus seven rule was/is a muslim rule for the acceptable age of marriage.
My friend Lamin's father is 65 and his new wife is about 30. Certainly not over 30. Although I have noticed African Muslims seem to prioritize the survival of the family unit above such petty things as age... for some reason.

Maybe there's a lesson there?

I was talking with some friends about this and was wondering what others thought. If a girl is 16, how old does the guy have to be before it becomes "creepy"?
16-year old chicks are the hottest! :eek:

I would say everything above 17 would be creepy.
Stay away from them, they are my categorie! :mad:

I agree with this guy.

Girl ;)


My best mate (Shes 18) doesnt date guys under 28, and hasnt done since she was about 15 or 16 (her last boyfriend was 30something). I'm used to her doing it, so I don't find it particularly creepy..although when I read that...:s Maybe she's discovered something about older men that I havent learnt yet....haha

Branin: I agree with this guy.
Rasselas: Girl


I see this a lot lately, apparently there are more and more girls on this forum.

Branin: I agree with this guy.
Rasselas: Girl


I see this a lot lately, apparently there are more and more girls on this forum.

Aren't you glad about the ratio?

Branin: I agree with this guy.
Rasselas: Girl


I see this a lot lately, apparently there are more and more girls on this forum.

I've been here since Feb 03, I just dont post with my old nation (Cornflake Gremlins)

When I was 17 I dated a 37 year old. I've dated a lot of older men, I dunno why, heh.

I agree though that it depends on the maturity level of the persons involved.

Aren't you glad about the ratio?
Not the current one (guys: 75%, non-guys: 25%)
But I'm liking the evolution. :)

@Rasselas: Now you made me hungry. :p

I was talking with some friends about this and was wondering what others thought. If a girl is 16, how old does the guy have to be before it becomes "creepy"?


I don't see a problem with, say, a 16 year old girl and a guy who is 30. I just don't see the issue, if they love each other, there's no problem with it. Besides, older men have no financial resources to help raise a family, support the woman, and are more emotionally mature to be there for her in an emotional role.

I think anything younger than 16 though, it's sick. 16 probably ought to be the marriage age (With parental consent) in the USA.

If I had a 16 year old daughter and an upper class White Heterosexual Christian, pro-western civilization, male, who happened to be say 30-35 wanted to marry her, as long as she wanted to marry him, and I thought he was a good guy, I'd give my approval.

so can the girl be older than the guy?


Sure, why not?


Personally, as long as the woman is still biologically capable of easily having at least 3-6 kids, she's still young enough and age shouldn't matter to much.

Not the current one (guys: 75%, non-guys: 25%)
But I'm liking the evolution. :)

Is that really how it is? : O I had no idea... I want some!