Beware!
The Underground City
23-01-2005, 22:34
If you don't believe that the whole world is a giant moose, you will go to a realm of torment after you die!!
I have no evidence, but if I am right, the unbelievers will get eternal torment!
Don't be eternally tormented, convert to moosism today!
Eutrusca
23-01-2005, 22:39
If you don't believe that the whole world is a giant moose, you will go to a realm of torment after you die!!
I have no evidence, but if I am right, the unbelievers will get eternal torment!
Don't be eternally tormented, convert to moosism today!
OMG! :eek:
I believe! I believe!
Um ... just what are the tenets of this particular "religion" anyway?
The Underground City
23-01-2005, 22:48
OMG! :eek:
I believe! I believe!
Um ... just what are the tenets of this particular "religion" anyway?
Well, you have to believe that the earth is ruled by a being which is infinitely superior to humans in terms of power and knowledge, but at the same time very irrational and petty. However, if you break his laws and he gets angry at you, which he will demonstrate by continuing to show no signs of existence, it will be your own fault, and you will deserve torment.
Also, it is immoral and a crime against nature to pick your nose in public, or go out wearing scruffy clothes. These get you eternal torment.
Santa Barbara
23-01-2005, 22:50
If you don't believe that the whole world is a giant moose, you will go to a realm of torment after you die!!
I have no evidence, but if I am right, the unbelievers will get eternal torment!
Don't be eternally tormented, convert to moosism today!
Oh yeah, prove the giant moose exists!
The Underground City
23-01-2005, 22:53
Oh yeah, prove the giant moose exists!
Well a popular ancient book made of lots of other books that has been edited hundreds of times and translated from various original languages, made a reference to it!!
OMG! :eek:
I believe! I believe!
Um ... just what are the tenets of this particular "religion" anyway?
Worship the Horn????
The Underground City
23-01-2005, 23:08
All you sinners need to start worshipping, or you'll get eternal torment!!1
Conceptualists
23-01-2005, 23:15
All you sinners need to start worshipping, or you'll get eternal torment!!1
What is the nature of this torment exactly?
The Underground City
23-01-2005, 23:18
What is the nature of this torment exactly?
There will be fire! and other things distorted from vague references in wacked-out ancient myths!
Conceptualists
23-01-2005, 23:22
There will be fire! and other things distorted from vague references in wacked-out ancient myths!
I think I will stick with the Chocalate Blamange
(he sends unbelievers to be sodomised by pixies and elves. In acid)
Alinania
23-01-2005, 23:27
I just converted to wiccan chocolatism very recently, and I think it would make my Chocolate God very angry if I were to leave Him now. Besides, this way I get to eat all the chocolate I want...what does the moose give you besides eternal torment?
Conceptualists
23-01-2005, 23:30
I just converted to wiccan chocolatism very recently, and I think it would make my Chocolate God very angry if I were to leave Him now. Besides, this way I get to eat all the chocolate I want...what does the moose give you besides eternal torment?
Chocolate Moose?
The Underground City
23-01-2005, 23:30
I just converted to wiccan chocolatism very recently, and I think it would make my Chocolate God very angry if I were to leave Him now. Besides, this way I get to eat all the chocolate I want...what does the moose give you besides eternal torment?
Ah, well if you're good then you get to spend eternity in an afterlife, free from all the things you didnt like in life, including all the sinners.
Alinania
23-01-2005, 23:32
Ah, well if you're good then you get to spend eternity in an afterlife, free from all the things you didnt like in life, including all the sinners.
But there's no chocolate, right?
...I think I prefer to stick with my sweet Wiccan Chocolate God for as long as I'm alive and when I grow old and lose all my teeth I'll convert to your Moosism so as to enjoy a wonderful afterlife. :p
The Underground City
23-01-2005, 23:46
But there's no chocolate, right?
...I think I prefer to stick with my sweet Wiccan Chocolate God for as long as I'm alive and when I grow old and lose all my teeth I'll convert to your Moosism so as to enjoy a wonderful afterlife. :p
Eternal life with the supreme being is worth a lack of chocolate!11
Alinania
23-01-2005, 23:55
Eternal life with the supreme being is worth a lack of chocolate!11
:eek: it is not!!
Dontgonearthere
24-01-2005, 00:01
The Star Goat could own your moose.
After all, its a sort of C'thulu in goat-form.
Bitchkitten
24-01-2005, 00:40
Well, you have to believe that the earth is ruled by a being which is infinitely superior to humans in terms of power and knowledge, but at the same time very irrational and petty. However, if you break his laws and he gets angry at you, which he will demonstrate by continuing to show no signs of existence, it will be your own fault, and you will deserve torment.
Also, it is immoral and a crime against nature to pick your nose in public, or go out wearing scruffy clothes. These get you eternal torment.
OMM (Oh My Moose) Eternal torment for me! You'll have to make up your own mind which mortal sin I have committed.