NationStates Jolt Archive

1. %90 of the population is aged 18-25, the rest is either 5-10, or 80-300
2. If you go outside in a short skirt, you will be viciously raped by alien tentacle-monsters and/or daemons.
3. Japanese mythology does not translate into animation well
4. People in Japan carry little paper cutouts in their pockets in order to display emotions
5. Massive bloodloss will not affect you in any way, shape, or form
6. Everybody speaks Japanese/English, everywhere.
7. It is a simple matter to behead/delimb/slice through a person with a sword, halberd, or laser rifle of doom
8. A 3in waist is healthy
9. You do not need special equipment to move around with a G-cup
10. Giant robots are energy effecient, and wont be used for any purpose other than killing people.
11. If they are used for some purpose they will go insane and start killing people.
12. You dont have to relode your gun unless you want to.
13. Guys can wear form-fitting suits as well, but only if its in order to better pilot a giant robot.

Add your own :P

14. Things bulge before they explode
15. Things don't always explode right away
16. The more central a mecha is to the story the larger explosion it makes
17. A mecha exploding in a brilliant nuclear-like flash does not mean it was completely destroyed or that it's pilot died.
18. Arms grow back.

19. People squint when thinking

20) Any size of inanimate object can be pulled out of thin air.
21) Cities destroyed in big battles are usually able to come back completely almost overnight
22) swords can deflect EVERYTHING
23) half naked woman cause massive nose bleeds

23. You don't have to use gell to get your hair to come out a highly implausible angles.

25. Schoolgirls and tentacles go together like peanut butter and jelly.

26) All Teenage Japanese girls have big breasts

27) There is magic in sex

28) Vampires drain sexual energy

29. Tentacles are a Japanese girls best friend.
30. When in a physical fight, you must incessantly groan and make weird faces for 95% of it.
31. Green and Blue are natural hair colours.

28. Women have to be
(a) good-looking
(b) young, sometimes really young
(c) have no wrinkles or skin blemishes
(d) talk lots
(e) wear short, transparent or tight skirts,
(f) are completely subordinate or rebellious
(g) get chased by complete losers.

32) Japan sucks
33) Sequential numbering is impossible when spread out amongst multiple posters on a thread.

Lol!!!

34) the more important a female character is (or whatever character with boobs), the bigger her breasts
35) science = magic, literally

34) all theme songs are made on one keyboards

everyone makes the \/ Symbol with their fingers when they are pleased..

35: Pathetic sad men tend to score when there is magic afoot.

37) Women moan, men grunt

(#whatever) Falling over in the middle of a sentence, and instantly regaining your footing, is common.

Big eyes, little mouth

no one really has a nose

Big eyes, little mouth

Unless they're giving a blow job.

-Wearing cursed clothing like knickers is an invitation to be raped

all main characters are dead eyes, unless they are bad guys which in case they can never hit the good guy or never fatally, where as good guys are always dead eyes even if they are blind or close to it

(whatever number we're on): The Tokyo Tower is NEVER a good place to be
(next): Every species in the universe has an identifiable, human-like penis(or peni), and uses it(them) readily... usually on underage high schoolers.
(next): Gay sex is not only ok, but a great way to sell more copies of an anime/manga... as long as one of the guys may as well be a woman without breasts
(lastly).... CAT GIRLS RULE!

-That demons only seek the appetites of the flesh.

No one EVER thinks something is out of the ordinary. If they do, they'll accept it in moments

-You can store little monsters in balls

-That it is possible to find the ultimate bra

-that there is even magic in card games.

1099234) If you have a strong will, you can still stand up and kill the enemy even if you have a giant whole right through your chest.

1099235) People can change size and become cute and small when needed.

1099236) Men don't have nipples. Only women.

1099237) Skinny tall runts have innumerable strength

1099238) Carrying swords bigger than themselves is a norm.

1099239) Japanese guy's Penises are boxey.

-You can inplant a human soul in a robot.

-Floating islands exist

-Sex never gets you pregnant in japan

-It's totally normal for a giant penis to pop out of the ground

Women get embarrased, but men never care

Women get embarrased, but men never care

-Unless they are the hero, in which they use their magic blade to cleave their enemies head off in anger.

LOL x3

All the bad guys have sex slaves, even the female bad guys. But the slaves are always women, never men

All the bad guys have sex slaves, even the female bad guys. But the slaves are always women, never men

All evil men are hideously ugly or deformed, and have mustaches.

All evil women are just as beautiful as the good guys.

people can fly

shoot energy beams out of the palms of their hands

have yellow skin

have crazy, spiked hair

everyone carrys a pistol

everyone is fascinated with teenage-girls' panties

everyone is fascinated with teenage-girls' panties

Thats true in real-life japan. You know they have used underwear dispensers over there?!?

-Godzilla will destroy us all! RAAAARRR! (I know it's not anime but he deserved an honerable mention-one of the best things out of Japan!)

Every woman is bisexual

Every woman is bisexual

But of course.

-Twins feel each others pleasure

But of course.

-Twins feel each others pleasure
twins often feel eachother

twins often feel eachother

LOL Thats true as well!

-Twins often share men

It's no inhibition at all that your sexpartner is a parent/child

-Incest is perfectly normal

- Life is a comedy of errors and misunderstandings.
- Improbable absurd coincidences will happen whenever needed and sometimes when not.
- All females are beautiful, and about half of them aren't human.
- Evolutionary parallelism will happen in different worlds, universes and planets, meaning few differences in people and animals from Earth to those from other, far-away places.
- Even utterly depressive and destroyed lives have really fun moments, unlike though it may be.
- Species of a being has nothing to do with their thought-process.
- Gloating is a villain's way to say "I'll end up infuriating you more, which will cause you to react and result in my demise, and I don't seem to be aware of this fact.".
- Anyone beyond 70 years of age knows EVERYTHING.
- Old men are still very sexually active - or they act it.
- Women are NEVER useless. They are either smart, strong, gentle or lucky. All are beautiful.
- Men, on the other hand, can and will prove to be useless or mistaken in the worst moment.
- There's always at least ONE person that's aware of everything.

-at least 1 in 10 people can transform into something else whether it is an adult or younger version of t hemselves or a more powerful version or even a monster, sometimes more than that many

-whenever aroused, embarrased, etc the upper parts of the cheek turn bright res

-women are completely helpless, unless you make them mad, then they can literally knock you to the moon

-old people are always the best martial artists, extra uberness points if they walk with a limp and a cane

"Nature" is magical and trumps all technology. (See any Miyazaki film.)


Thats true in real-life japan. You know they have used underwear dispensers over there?!?

At least they used to. I can say I've outlasted the rise and fall of the kogyaru panchi vending machines. o.O

-Godzilla will destroy us all! RAAAARRR! (I know it's not anime but he deserved an honerable mention-one of the best things out of Japan!)

Or at least he'll destroy whichever building is trendy. (I honesty do wish he'd com along and destroy the monsterous eyesore that is Kyoto station. The architect deserves the WWII POW treatment! :eek: )

Anyone travelling at a speed much faster than walking space when not in a vehicle will instantly have a tunnel of light and coulor apear around them

Drops of sweat are white and opaque when on Japanese skin

Giant hammers can pop out of nowhere when a girl is mad.

All evil women have penises, or can conjure one up.

The loner always has super psychic powers.

Japan is run by satanists and FF ripoffs.

Apparently Earth doesn't notice when

a) aliens attack
b) mutants attack
c) A country goes insane.

If the main hero has a girlfriend, or a best friend, they are gonna get raped. Male or not.... Oo

The Laws of Anime
Version 6.0

Originally compiled and edited by Darrin Bright and Ryan Shellito

Read about the history of the Laws of Anime.

1.

Law of Metaphysical Irregularity

The normal laws of physics do not apply.

2.

Law of Differentiated Gravitation

Whenever someone or something jumps, is thrown, or otherwise is rendered airborn, gravity is reduced by a factor of 4.

3.

Law of Sonic Amplification, First Law of Anime Acoustics

In space, loud sounds, like explosions, are even louder because there is no air to get in the way.

4.

Law of Constant Thrust, First Law of Anime Motion

In space, constant thrust equals constant velocity.

5.

Law of Mechanical Mobility, Second Law of Anime Motion

The larger a mechanical device is, the faster it moves. Armored Mecha are the fastest objects known to human science.

6.

Law of Temporal Variability

Time is not a constant. Time stops for the hero whenever he does something 'cool' or 'impressive'. Time slows down when friends and lovers are being killed and speeds up whenever there is a fight.

7.

First Law of Temporal Mortality

'Good Guys' and 'Bad Guys' both die in one of two ways. Either so quick they don't even see it coming, OR it's a long drawn out affair where the character gains much insight to the workings of society, human existence or why the toast always lands butter side down.

8.

Second Law of Temporal Mortality

It takes some time for bad guys to die... regardless of physical damage. Even when the 'Bad Guys' are killed so quickly they didn't even see it coming, it takes them a while to realize they are dead. This is attributed to the belief that being evil damages the Reality Lobe of the brain.

9.

Law of Dramatic Emphasis

Scenes involving extreme amounts of action are depicted with either still-frames or black screens with a slash of bright color (usually red or white).

10.

Law of Dramatic Multiplicity

Scenes that only happen once, for instance, a 'Good Guy' kicks the 'Bad Guy' in the face, are seen at least 3 times from 3 different angles.

11.

Law of Inherent Combustability

Everything explodes. Everything.
*

First Corollary - Anything that explodes bulges first.
*

Second Corollary - Large cities are the most explosive substances known to human science. Tokyo in particular seems to be the most unstable of these cities, sometimes referred to as "The Matchstick City".

12.

Law of Phlogistatic Emission

Nearly all things emit light from fatal wounds.

13.

Law of Energetic Emission

There is alway an energy build up (commonly referred to as an energy 'bulge') before Mecha or space craft weapons fire. Because of the explosive qualities of weapons, it is believed that this is related to the Law of Inherent Combustability.

14.

Law of Inverse Lethal Magnitude

The destructive potential of a weapon is inversly proportional to its size.
*

First Corollary - Small and cute will always overcome big and ugly. Also know as the A-Ko phenomenon.

15.

Law of Inexhaustability

No one *EVER* runs out of ammunition. That is of course unless they are cornered, out-numbered, out-classed, and unconscious.

16.

Law of Inverse Accuracy

The accuracy of a 'Good Guy' when operating any form of fire-arm increases as the difficulty of the shot increases. The accuracy of the 'Bad Guys' when operating fire-arms decreases when the difficulty of the shot decreases. (Also known as the Stormtrooper Effect)

Example: A 'Good Guy' in a drunken stupor being held upside down from a moving vehicle will always hit, and several battalions of 'Bad Guys' firing on a 'Good Guy' standing alone in the middle of an open field will always miss.
*

First Corollary - The more 'Bad Guys' there are, the less likely they will hit anyone or do any real damage.
*

Second Corollary - Whenever a 'Good Guy' is faced with insurmountable odds, the 'Bad Guys' line up in neat rows, allowing the hero to take them all out with a single burst of automatic fire and then escape.
*

Third Corollary - Whenever a 'Good Guy' is actually hit by enemy fire, it is in a designated 'Good Guy Area', usually a flesh wound in the shoulder or arm, which restricts the 'Good Guy' from doing anything more strenuous than driving, firing weaponry, using melee weapons, operating heavy machinery, or doing complex martial arts maneuvres.

17.

Law of Transient Romantic Unreliability

Minmei is a bimbo.

18.

Law of Hemoglobin Capacity

The human body contains over 12 gallons of blood, sometimes more, under high pressure.

19.

Law of Demonic Consistency

Demons and other supernatural creatures have at least three eyes, loads of fangs, tend to be yellow-green or brown (but black is not unknown), and can only be hurt by bladed weapons.

20.

Law of Militaristic Unreliability

Huge galaxy-wide armadas, entire armies, and large war-machines full of cruel, heartless, bloodthirsty warriors can be stopped and defeated with a single insignificant example of a caring/loving emotion or a song.

21.

Law of Tactical Unreliability

Tactical geniuses aren't....

22.

Law of Inconsequential Undetectability

People never notice the little things... Like missing body parts, or wounds the size of Seattle.

23.

Law of Juvenile Intellectuality

Children are smarter than adults. And almost always twice as annoying.

24.

Law of Americanthropomorphism

Americans in Anime appear in one of two roles, either as a really nasty skinny 'Bad Guy' or a big stupid 'Good Guy'.
*

First Corollary - The only people who are more stupid than the big dumb Americans are the American translators. (Sometimes referred to as the Green Line Effect.)
*

Second Corollary - The only people who are more stupid than the American translators are the American editors and censors.

25.

Law of Mandibular Proportionality

(from A. Hicks)

The size of a person's mouth is directly proportional to the volume at which they are speaking or eating.

26.

Law of Feline Mutation

(from A. Hicks)

Any half-cat/half-human mutation will invariably:
1. be female,
2. will possess ears and sometimes a tail as a genetic mutation,
3. and wear as little clothing as possible, if any.

27.

Law of Conservation of Firepower

(from U. Williams)

Any powerful weapon capable of destroying/defeating an opponent in a single shot will invariably be reserved and used only as a last resort.

28.

Law of Technological User-Benevolence

(from U. Williams)

The formal training required to operate a spaceship or mecha is inversely proportional to its complexity.

29.

Law of Melee Luminescence

(from U. Williams)

Any being displaying extremely high levels of martial arts prowess and/or violent emotions emits light in the form of a glowing aura. This aura is usually blue for 'good guys' and red for 'bad guys'. This is attributed to Good being higher in the electromagnetic spectrum than Evil.

30.

Law of Non-anthropomorphic Antagonism

(from U. Williams)

All ugly, non-humanoid alien races are hostile, and usually hell-bent on destroying humanity for some obscure reason.

31.

Law of Follicular Chroma Variability

(from Spellweaver)

Any color in the visible spectrum is considered a natural hair color. This color can change without warning or explanation.

32.

Law of Follicular Permanence

Hair in anime is pretty much indestructable, and can resist any amount of meteorological conditions, energy emissions, physical abuse, or explosive effects and still look perfect. The only way to hurt someone's hair is the same way you deal with demons... with bladed weapons!

33.

Law of Topological Aerodynamics, First Law of Anime Aero-Dynamics

*ANY* shape, no matter how convoluted or odd-looking, is automatically aerodynamic.

34.

Law of Probable Attire

Clothing in anime follows certain predictable guidelines.

Female characters wear as little clothing as possible, regardless of whether it is socially or meteorologically appropriate. Any female with an excessive amount of clothing will invariably have her clothes ripped to shreds or torn off somehow. If there is no opportunity to tear off the afore-mentioned female's clothes, then she will inexplicably take a shower for no apparent reason (also known as the Gratuitous Shower Scene).

Whenever there is a headwind, a Male characters will invariably wear a long cloak which doesn't hamper movement and billows out dramatically behind him.
*

First Corollary (Cryo-Adaptability) - All anime characters are resistant to extremely cold temperatures, and do not need to wear heavy or warm clothing in snow.
*

Second Corollary (Indecent Invulnerability) - Bikinis render the wearer invulnerable to any form of damage.

35.

Law of Musical Omnipotence

Any character capable of musical talent (singing, playing an instrument, etc.) is automatically capable of doing much more "simple" things like piloting mecha, fighting crime, stopping an intergalactic war, and so on... especially if they have never attempted these things before.

36.

Law of Quitupular Aggultination

(from Daniel Mikula)

Also called "The Five-man Rule," when "Good Guys" group together, it tends to be in groups of five. There are five basic positions, which are:

1. The Hero/Leader
2. His girlfriend
3. His Best Friend/Rival
4. A Hulking Brute
5. A Dwarf/Kid

Between these basic positions are distributed several attributes, which include:

1. Extreme Coolness
2. Amazing intelligence
3. Incredible Irritation


37.

Law of Extradimensional Capacitance

(from Jason Bustard)

All anime females have an extradimensional storage space of variable volume somewhere on their person from which they can instantly retrieve any object at a moment's notice.
*

First Corollary (The Hammer Rule) - The most common item stored is a heavy mallet, which can be used with unerring accuracy on any male who deserves it. Other common items include costumes/uniforms, power suits/armor, and large bazookas.

38.

Law of Hydrostatic Emission

Eyes tend to be rather large in Anime. This is because they contain several gallons of water, which may be instantaneously released at high pressure through large tear ducts. The actual volume of water contained in the eyes is unknown, as there is no evidence to suggest that these reservoirs are actually capable of running out. The reason water tends to collect in the eyes is because Anime characters only have one large sweat gland, which is located at the back of the head. When extremely stressed, embarrassed, or worried, this sweat gland exudes a single but very large drop of sebaceous fluid.

39.

Law of Inverse Attraction

Success at finding suitable mates is inversely proportionate to how desperately you want to be successful. The more you want, the less you get.
*

First Corollary Unfortunately, this law seems to apply to Otaku in the real world...

40.

Law of Nasal Sanguination

(from Ryan Pritchard and Jason Aylen)

When sexually aroused, males in Anime don't get erections, they get nosebleeds. No one's sure why this is, though... the current theory suggests that larger eyes means smaller sinuses and thinner sinus tissue (see Law #38 above). Females don't get nosebleeds, but invariably get one heck of a blush along the cheeks and across the nose, suggesting a lot of bloodflow to that region.

41.

Law of Xylolaceration

(from Lyndon Harris)

Wooden or bamboo swords are just as sharp as metal swords, if not sharper.

42.

Law of Juvenile Omnipotence

(from Erin Alia)

Always send a boy to do a man's job. He'll get it done in half the time and twice the angst.

43.

Law of Quadrotriscadecophobia

There is no Law #43.

44.

Law of Nominative Clamovocation

(from Luiko-Ysabeth and Adrian Hsiah)

The likelihood of success and damage done by a martial arts attack is directly proportional to the volume at which the full name of the attack is announced.

45.

Law of Uninteruptable Metamorphosis

(from R. A. Hubby)

Regardless of how long or involved the transformation sequence or how many times they've seen it before, any 'Bad Guys' witnessing a mecha/hero/heroine transforming are too stunned to do anything to interrupt it.

46.

Law of Flimsy Incognition

(from Conrad Knauer)

Simply changing into a costume or wearing a teensy mask can make you utterly unrecognizable to even your closest friends and relatives.

Link: http://www.abcb.com/laws/

actually, if you have ever watched big o the law of extradimensial capaciwahetever applies to any centered character (any one the show is NOT about directly): the butler pulls the biggest gun you have ever seen out of bloody nowhere


-the size of a gun is inversely proportional its difficulty to use.

-all people are inherently good, bad, or cowards

-at least one former rival or bad guy will switch to your side and help you with whatever

-all animate robots (ie not piloted) have human companions, unless they are bad guys.

Bookworms, that is frikkin' awesome.

Bookworms, that is frikkin' awesome.
however, like most of his stuff he took it from somewhere else isntead of making it up himself

I know. He credits the authors at the top and posts the link at the bottom. It doesn't make it any less awesome.

What, should I have said "nice find" or "thanks for drawing my attention to this awesome site" instead?

Whenever fighting with katanas, bad guys will nager good guys, causing them to growl louder and louder until they lunge in a devestating attack, jumping 20ft in the air with strobing colours in jagged formations behind them.

Women can hide theings in their vaginas, including snakes (Ninja Scroll)

Up until the 1700s, Giant Pig gods lived in the forests of Japan alongside giant wolf gods and a little girl called Princess Monononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononoke

People can have anything as a random body part, including

-metal/organic arm (Tetsuo)
-A drill penis (Dead Leaves)
-A gun for an arm (lots of things)
-half metal interiors, including optic camo (Ghost in the Shell)
-Sword arms (Dead Leaves, again)

If you eat wou eat either a very tiny amount a girl made for you, or you eat a HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGE meal in 5 seconds

When engaged in a fight, both fighters must stand still and growl/grunt under their breath for 10 minutes, before fighting for a minute, and then repeating the process.

When talking, the Japanese confuse their foes by moving their mouths out of sync with their voices and producing subtitles that are different from the words they spoke. This is particularly effective against foreigners, who are yet to master this difficult art.

- When the planet is threatened with total destruction, go turn a WW2 wreck into a space cruiser and crew it with rookies.

- When coming in, play chicken with the ship heading out. You'll only lose 2 coats of paint.

- Never make a deal with the aliens.

- There is a limitless supply of fighters/mecha/tanks for you to pilot.

- If you warp to Pluto because you folded in the atmosphere, turn the aircraft carriers into arms and make the alien spaceship you hardly begin to understand into a giant mech.

- THE MISS MACROSS PAGENT WAS FIXED!!

In pornographic anime, Sailor moon appears rather too often for a kids show :eek:

-zombies, ghosts, and demons all exist

-taking pictures of ghosts hurts them, *cough cough fatal frame cough*

-peoples heads get bigger than their bodies when embarrassed

-anyone can pilot an advanced futuristic mech machine, even if they are ten

EVERYONE has a sidekick

oh yeah and a few more things...

-people can get robot-bodies and be part machine

-absolutely everyone knows some form of martial arts

-you can tell someone is drunk when their eyes get all swirly

-when people are mad they have a vein pop out on their forehead

-when people are injured they get a body-cast, no matter how bad the injury

-when people are sick, they turn green

Girls always respond passionately to sex, even if it's rape.

-

- THE MISS MACROSS PAGENT WAS FIXED!!
:D

Unless your a bad guy (or a midget), your hair can be used as a measure of how strong you are.

*tag*

If your hair covers half of your face, you will have the Ultimate Cool Factor.

All combining robots join in the multiple of 5

Dairugger 15 (Voltoms in the US) can coordinate the forming of the giant robot with 15 vehcles and not have a single crash.

Bad guys always wait til the robot/powerful weapon is fully formed.

All God-Robot weapons are voice activated.

Grown ups must go through years of training to pilot a mecha that a kid can do with the manual on his lap.

the enemy ships and all support ships will explode when sneezed at... the main flagships will withstand a supernova with only their paint burned off.

Death is not a certanty.

Beware of the quiet ones... they will be the ones to kick your ass.

The corrupt government can kill all your friends, alienate you from the public yet not take back the secret thing you stole/got from them.

The longer the name of the attack, the more damage it will do.

The less ladies wear, the better armored they are.

The foul-mouthed, tough-as-nail woman is really a softy at heart.

The smaller the eyes, the more evil you are.

Cops, even when they have a gun in their hands, won't shoot unless they are going to die.

Office Ladies who are constantly late, are never fired.

Girls... never call your fathers 'Papa' in public.

Guys... Never have any lady call you 'Papa' in public.

It's not Illegal if Pubic Hair is missing.

The worse curse to give a guy is to have him living with 3 or more girls who like him.

... moreso if the girls are willing to 'share'

Beware the Hyperdimensional Hammer.

All of the crazed scientists will have a robot in their secret lab.

All good robots strive to be human.

If it's unusal, cute and furry, take good care of it... for it will be a loyal friend that can and will save your life.

Blondes are scary...

LOL x3

LOL x300 yen! :D

Father-son relationships are at best combative (eg Ranma) and at worst Exploitative (eg Evangelion).

The older you become, the less you resemble a human and the closer you get to being a small pillow with a face.

Only the hero is allowed to date an elf chick.

Before you attack someone, you have to loudly declare what the attack is.

Optimus Prime is awesome.

There are Ninjas following you.

Everywhere.

At every minute.

There are Ninjas following you.

Everywhere.

At every minute.
and they know animejitsua

and they know animejitsua

Oh no! It's a Doppleganger!

*Chucks thousands of Kunai and Shuriken and Girant Swords and Small Children at everyone*

*turns into a panda*
http://www.ranma-otaku.com/gal/art/offi/genma/panda.gif
...
...
...
*holds up a sign*
GRRRR!!
PANDAS CANT TYPE!

The government is actively involved in research into mecha-based weapons
-Said mecha will always tried to be stolen by an enemy force
-The prototype mecha (henceforth refered to as "Gundam) always end up in the hands of a teenage boy
-"Good" and "evil" simply don't describe the motives of you or your enemy
-Mid mecha combat, you and your opponent will pause to exchange philosophical dialogue

-No mech in an anime will be all ranged type weapons and must always have a melee weapon despite the old saying, bring a knife to a gun fight

-all high school students must wear uniform,no exceptions (I watch a documentry and saw a few high schools that are uniform free)

-Japan, has, is and always will be, the most powerful nation on earth.

Ninjas bury log dummies deep inside their... um.. pockets.. so you they can drop them in the middle of combat.

Every nation puts "Neo" at the front of its name. And America is populated by stupid, arrogant, yet kindly at heart, cowboys. With blue hair. And Europe doesn't exist.

Any girl who is sweet and innocent and pure acts as if they don't even know about the birds and the bees, and any such girl will never have sex.

Any girl who is a total hardass will eventually soften her heart for one of the main characters, but usually not the hero, as he get's the agony of being paired up with the psuedo-child innocent girl.

Upon a females arrival to Japan, she is immediatly given giant breasts that're bigger than her own chest, which have also been immediatly expanded to 5 times their normal size.

Saying, whispering or yelling "It's a Gundam!" will cause you to explode, along with whatever it is you are currently in [building, robot, car, tank, bath tub, etc.].

fantastic thread.....

easily one of the best ever!

All Japanese males style their hair with a weed-wacker and superglue.

- The odds of romantic and sexual attraction between a couple is magnified exponentially if one half of a pair is a blonde caucasian and the other half is Japanese. Gender is merely a secondary consideration in this matter.

- Black men in Anime have lips that make Angelina Jolie seethe in envy. On the other hand most black men in Anime are granted automatic coverage by the Keith David Clause; i.e. at the very least they will not be the first one to die, and in fact may make it all the way to the end of the film/series.

http://www.abcb.com/laws/

Anything with a religious reference in the name will be at least a half-order of magnitude more effective than a comparable item without. This becomes a full order of magnitude if the reference does not make sense.

First Corollary: Most people with an interest in anime wonder why not everything has a random religious reference tacked onto its name.

Second Corollary: If anything has had a random religious reference tacked onto its name, even money says that so has just about everything else.

It doesn't matter how much the government might want to train people, the best robot pilots are always teenaged boys.

If there's a sport there's a martial arts form for it.

It is considered polite in Japan to tell people exactly how you're going to attack them before actually attacking them.

- The Japanese have been bending the laws of physics for their own personal amusement since the dawn of civilization, without the need to be plugged into a giant supercomputer.

2/3 of Japanese people have pale skin, round eyes, and blonde or blue hair.

Honestly, the first time I saw anime, I was like "where are all the Japanese?"

- A bunch of shuriken in properly trained hands will have a rate of fire comparable to a minigun and will also punch through a lot of things like depleted uranium.

- That's not your life flashing before your eyes; that's some guy's sword cutting you into neat sections that will spray into a blood fountain before falling off like the deli special.

- Even dumbfire missiles seem to possess a modicum of tracking technology or at the very least the person firing them knows how to make them barrel roll around numerous obstacles.

you dont actually need to have pockets to pull something out of your pocket

if a person moves very very fast all you see is 5 or 6 black lines appear and then dissapear

if 2 people want to kill each other on a street late at night with no one around,they will either think to themselves for 3 minutes each about what the person did or what they said to make them want to kil that person or they will talk to each other about the same thing.

~the larger a melee weapon is, the easier it is to weild effectivly.
~all swimwear is water-activated.
~the more outragous your wardrobe, the better you are at fighting.

If you are a shy, naive and otherwise inexperienced guy prone to blushing - chances are you will inevitably end up seeing the entire female cast naked in the hot springs.

If you wear a short skirt, your chances of it flying up and flashing your panties increase exponentially when around the school pervert.

Blue hair never ever needs re-dying.

It is very possible to exhale mushrooms.

It's all fun and games until a rampaging robot destroys half your city.

Don't dub with your mouth full....

During particularly emotional scenes - your hair will always blow in the wind. Even if you are indoors..

Despite the fact that the enemy is running at you armed with automatic weapons - you will always have time to strike a cool pose before diving for cover.

It is also possible to perform difficult stunts and martial arts while wearing a ludicrously skimpy PVC outfit.

- The rule of Invulnerable Nudity is present. the less you wear the more protected you are.

- It's trouble when one man is living in a building full of Georgous Single women. (Love Hina, Ah! My Goddess, VanDredd)

- Old people know Stuff.

- Always watch out for the Quite ones.

- Never call anyone [Especially your father] 'PAPA'

- Don't need masks to hide your Identity... no one will notice. (Catseye, Lupin III)

- Katsumi Tendo is THE most Powerful Fighter in the Ranma 1/2 world.

- Magic and Technology will work side by side (Dragon Half, Silent Mobius)

- the Main character's ship will take multiple hits before smoking... the enemies ships will blow up if a crew member trips and slams into the deck. (Yamato, Legend of the Galactic Heroes, Captain Taylor)

- beware of the Cute and Fuzzy creatures, they will kick your @$$. (Tenchi Muyo, Rayearth, Card Captor Sakura)

- Delivering TOFU will help you become a World class race car driver. (Initial D)

- Its easy to pilot mecha... all you need is the owner's manual on your lap at the time (Gundam)

- All evil men have squity or Narrow eyes.

- When a lone gust of wind blows by... someone close to you has died.

- When you see someone and they are looking at you and suddenly you are surrounded by a field of Roses/flowers/flower petals and it is NOT Sakura Season... RUN! if they are the same sex as you... RUN FASTER!

- the most popular type of Anime favored by people in Nationstates is Hentai (Adult)

(A B.A.D clause. B.A.D = Bad American Dubbing)
All space pirates, and Cool Cowboy types have to have a John Wayne type voice.

All Scientists have to have German Accents... especially when they are Evil Mad Scientists.

If a man sees a young women naked or partialy dressed, she will become extremely violent/angry and attack him...

The man will ether meekly take the violence or run-away...

Often this hints at both having real fealings for the other or potential for some sort of relationship, espicialy if it occurs when they both meet...

Relationships are courtships of misunderstanding and awkard moments tempered by feelings of love(true in the real world)...

If Europe exists in some form, they will eat Japanese food.