NationStates Jolt Archive

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/1020/1020_01.asp
(please oh please I hope this link works. If it doesn't, go to http://www.chick.com/catalog/tractlist.asp -> new

What I learnt from this tract is that:
-Muslims order kidnappers to steal children, but the author seems to have forgotten that by the end of the comic.
-Throw a bible in a living room, or even mention it, and all domestic violence ends.
-God is like a passive Superman.

Why did this remind me of Ned Flanders praying to God to save his Todd? It was in that Simpsons episode where Ned wants to baptise Maggie, if I remember correctly.

The only thing you have to learn from this thread is that Jack Chick is a loony.

Then again, we all have our loonies, don't we?

There is no cause so right and good that one cannot find a fool following it.

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/1020/1020_01.asp
(please oh please I hope this link works. If it doesn't, go to http://www.chick.com/catalog/tractlist.asp -> new

What I learnt from this tract is that:
-Muslims order kidnappers to steal children, but the author seems to have forgotten that by the end of the comic.
-Throw a bible in a living room, or even mention it, and all domestic violence ends.
-God is like a passive Superman.

Why did this remind me of Ned Flanders praying to God to save his Todd? It was in that Simpsons episode where Ned wants to baptise Maggie, if I remember correctly.


Haha! It's great. Especially that stupid girl... what, she needs to ask Jesus what to do when kiddnapped?! Holy cow! What do you think you should do, idiot?! yell!

That is in poor taste for anybody who has been the unfortunate victim of kidnapping.

If people would just give their kids guns and teach them to shoot strangers on sight that sort of thing would never happen.

Ah, good to know that the Jack Chicks of the world are still out there for the rest of us to have a laugh.

Have you read the "gay agenda" one? The gay men all have cute little demons on their shoulders! =)

Any of you guys ever seen the Space Moose paradoy?

What I learnt from this tract is that:
-Muslims order kidnappers to steal children, but the author seems to have forgotten that by the end of the comic.
-Throw a bible in a living room, or even mention it, and all domestic violence ends.


Which tract did you read? this one never mentions muslims and doesnt have even one image of a bible.

If people would just give their kids guns and teach them to shoot strangers on sight that sort of thing would never happen.
how very true.

Oh my god! Look at the Rabbi Waxman one! The jewish people are such rasist carticures!

Which tract did you read? this one never mentions muslims and doesnt have even one image of a bible.

Did you miss the part where they make it clear that all the kidnapped kids are being sent to Saudi Arabia?

Ah, good to know that the Jack Chicks of the world are still out there for the rest of us to have a laugh.

Have you read the "gay agenda" one? The gay men all have cute little demons on their shoulders! =)

Didn't the guy change the Lot story in that one? I thought that Lot was sent to Sodom and Gomorrah to persuade them to change their ways, but he ran away and got eaten by a whale. In the comic strip he says that God wanted to destroy Sodom and Gomorrah, but Lot lived there so he had to evacuate him first.

Did you miss the part where they make it clear that all the kidnapped kids are being sent to Saudi Arabia?

There was no part that said all kidnapped kids are being sent to Saudi Arabia. In this story, there was a child abduction ring that was being run from Saudi Arabia. That doesnt mean that every kidnapped child is sent to Saudi Arabia, as you so ridiculously imply. It also does not have anything to do with religion or being muslim. I think what they wanted to show was that this was an international child kidnapping ring. Why did they choose Saudi Arabia? I dont know for sure. They couldve picked just about any country, they just chose Saudi Arabia.

Didn't the guy change the Lot story in that one? I thought that Lot was sent to Sodom and Gomorrah to persuade them to change their ways, but he ran away and got eaten by a whale. In the comic strip he says that God wanted to destroy Sodom and Gomorrah, but Lot lived there so he had to evacuate him first.

Not at all. Lot did live there. You are confusing him with Jonah who was sent to warn Nineveh but didnt want to so he tried to run away from God and couldnt. They are two entirely different stories with entirely different endings. Nineveh actually repents and God spares them.

Which tract did you read? this one never mentions muslims and doesnt have even one image of a bible.
The chick tract clearly stated that little girls were being kidnapped at the command of Saudi royalty.

You people are arguing over what lies bad propaganda did or did not mentio, you know.

There was no part that said all kidnapped kids are being sent to Saudi Arabia. In this story, there was a child abduction ring that was being run from Saudi Arabia. That doesnt mean that every kidnapped child is sent to Saudi Arabia, as you so ridiculously imply. It also does not have anything to do with religion or being muslim. I think what they wanted to show was that this was an international child kidnapping ring. Why did they choose Saudi Arabia? I dont know for sure. They couldve picked just about any country, they just chose Saudi Arabia.
Chick hates Muslims. It's implied that Muslims are doing the deed.



I thought the bastard would be dead by now, but noooo. He has to make more tracts.

I love the bit with the domestic disturbance scene:
"Well I don't see God in this house..."
"We replaced him with our television set"
One can just picture the scene -
"Hey honey! look at today's paper: We can get ourselves a new television if we trade in our old God!"

Great policework, too. Don't arrest anyone. Just tell them God loves them and let them go.

I see the artist has really let Mel's 'Passion of the Christ' get to him, with the crucifixation pic.

The chick tract clearly stated that little girls were being kidnapped at the command of Saudi royalty.

No, it stated they were being kidnapped and sent to Saudi Arabia. Your own bias inserted the Saudi royalty part. You must be dumb to the fact that Saudi Arabia is a rich nation where you are much more likely to see people driving Hummers than Hondas. The story does not mention the muslim religion, or royalty at all, your own biases have inserted that into the story.

The Why did they choose Saudi Arabia? I dont know for sure. They couldve picked just about any country, they just chose Saudi Arabia.
If you believe that they just 'accidently' chose Saudi Arabia, you are very naiive.

I see the artist has really let Mel's 'Passion of the Christ' get to him, with the crucifixation pic.
Nah. He's been doing "Jesus in a Blender" drawings for years. And Mel is an evil devil worshipper, according to Chick.

No, it stated they were being kidnapped and sent to Saudi Arabia. Your own bias inserted the Saudi royalty part. You must be dumb to the fact that Saudi Arabia is a rich nation where you are much more likely to see people driving Hummers than Hondas. The story does not mention the muslim religion, or royalty at all, your own biases have inserted that into the story.
Chick fucking hates Muslims. It's pretty damn deliberate.

Anyone read 'The Accident'?
Doesn't really make much sense at all. Love how nothing is mentioned about the fact the rug is made from the fur of White tigers. Apparently that's ok. Staining it is the bad thing.

Chick fucking hates Muslims. It's pretty damn deliberate.

The problem is that you have to assume its deliberate because the tract says nothing. So, it was your own assumptions that linked it to muslims, not the tract. If the tract had mentioned muslims anywhere, there would be a real link, but it doesnt, it just menions a country.

Nah. He's been doing "Jesus in a Blender" drawings for years. And Mel is an evil devil worshipper, according to Chick.

Yup. Us Catholics are actually the whore of babylon, according to Chick. And the Pope, the 84 year old man who can barely talk, is the antichcrist! He plans to take over the world and have himself worshipped! OH NOES!

Seriously, Chick gives us Christians a bad name. I have never met a Catholic or Protestant who likes him. And he really needs to read the bible. If he read it he'd see "Judge lest ye not be judged."

Chick fucking hates Muslims. It's pretty damn deliberate.
Yep, just read 'Allah had no son' for further confirmation of that.
http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0042/0042_01.asp

Yup. Us Catholics are actually the whore of babylon, according to Chick. And the Pope, the 84 year old man who can barely talk, is the antichcrist! He plans to take over the world and have himself worshipped! OH NOES!

Seriously, Chick gives us Christians a bad name. I have never met a Catholic or Protestant who likes him. And he really needs to read the bible. If he read it he'd see "Judge lest ye not be judged."
Read last rites:
http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0082/0082_01.asp
A good Roman Catholic who has always helped others dies and Jesus condemns him to Hell because he's a Catholic. What a wonderful, caring God chick has!

This guy who writes this is seriously fucked up and hates everyone in the World.

Seriously, Chick gives us Christians a bad name. I have never met a Catholic or Protestant who likes him. And he really needs to read the bible. If he read it he'd see "Judge lest ye not be judged."

I dont like the tracts and I have to wonder who, if anyone, is buying them. Ive never met a person who thinks like those tracts do, and Ive come into contact with many many christians through my involvement in ministry. Actually, now that I think about it, I can remember one group Ive come into contact with that thinks like that. It was a group calling its self the Anabaptists, and I encountered them not in a ministry fair or convention or any sort of christian gathering, actually I encountered them while shopping at a gun show. They had their own table with fliers about the end of the world and how we need to stock up on water, canned goods, firearms, etc. Weird stuff.

Somewhere, someplace, fifty thousand Muslims are celebrating Jack Chicks- the man who gave them assurance that their god was the right one.

The problem is that you have to assume its deliberate because the tract says nothing. So, it was your own assumptions that linked it to muslims, not the tract. If the tract had mentioned muslims anywhere, there would be a real link, but it doesnt, it just menions a country.

Read other tracts by him. He portrays all muslims as hateful suicide bombers.

Read last rites:
http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0082/0082_01.asp
A good Roman Catholic who has always helped others dies and Jesus condemns him to Hell because he's a Catholic. What a wonderful, caring God chick has!

This guy who writes this is seriously fucked up and hates everyone in the World.

What a sick man chick is. I'd like to show him the bible passage where Jesus tells peter that he is the rock he will build his church off of. Peter was the first Bishop of Rome(pope). His successors(popes) are continuing the church Christ founded. So Chick is actually condemning members of Christs church.

This bit's good.
Little boy to girl:
"We all go to Heaven, right?"
"No Timmy, most people will end up in Hell"

What a fantastic line!

From Apes, Lies and Ms Hen
http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/1051/1051_01.asp
Apparently God made Dinosuars and Man on the same day 6000 years ago. Says so in the Bible evidently.

Great final line, too:
"if YOU believe in Evolution instead of Jesus, you'll end up in Hell."

I wonder what's the point of having the tick box below the cartoon that says 'Do you accept Jesus Christ as your own personal saviour' Yes/No?
I mean is he really interested in those of us that don't? I suppose he'll send hundreds of offensive and bloody cartoons about burning in Hell if you tick 'No'.
You know, I'm tempted.

Who is Chick to decide who goes to hell and who doesn't? I leave that to Jesus, not some messaih wannabe named Jack Chick.

Read other tracts by him. He portrays all muslims as hateful suicide bombers.

I am aware of that. However, that isnt THIS tract. My point was to bring to light the fact that peoples bias is coloring their perception of what this tract actually says. We have a bunch of people claiming that this tract said something against muslims (it didnt), and even one person who understood the tract to be saying something about the Saudi royal family! (never mentioned anywhere in the tract).

Peoples bias? ahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

Seriously, if you want to call anyone biased call Jack Chick biased.

Peoples bias? ahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

Seriously, if you want to call anyone biased call Jack Chick biased.


bias is a preconcieved notion that affects your perception of reality. It is peoples preconceived notions about Jack Chick's own biases that affected their perception of the tract in order to make them see things that the tract did not say. Yes, Jack Chick is biased. But by definition so is everyone who saw a non-existant attack on muslims in that tract.

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/1020/1020_01.asp
(please oh please I hope this link works. If it doesn't, go to http://www.chick.com/catalog/tractlist.asp -> new

What I learnt from this tract is that:
-Muslims order kidnappers to steal children, but the author seems to have forgotten that by the end of the comic.
-Throw a bible in a living room, or even mention it, and all domestic violence ends.
-God is like a passive Superman.

Why did this remind me of Ned Flanders praying to God to save his Todd? It was in that Simpsons episode where Ned wants to baptise Maggie, if I remember correctly.

And, of course, that only non-christians engage in domestic violence - and christians never do.

:(

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/1020/1020_01.asp
(please oh please I hope this link works. If it doesn't, go to http://www.chick.com/catalog/tractlist.asp -> new

What I learnt from this tract is that:
-Muslims order kidnappers to steal children, but the author seems to have forgotten that by the end of the comic.
-Throw a bible in a living room, or even mention it, and all domestic violence ends.
-God is like a passive Superman.

Why did this remind me of Ned Flanders praying to God to save his Todd? It was in that Simpsons episode where Ned wants to baptise Maggie, if I remember correctly.
"Flanders to God, Flanders to God, Get off your cloud and save my Todd!"



lol "we replaced him with our televeision set"

Wow. That was deep. I think I'm going to stay atheist forever now.

His "comics" or whatever make no sense. It jumps from one scene to another without a logical connection.

This is a even more retarded line:

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/5010/5010_01.asp


A bully says to a kid, "Hey Tommy, you look different."

Tommy: I know. I have a powerful friend who is going to protect me.

Bully: Really?... can we be friends?


:headbang:

What a sick man chick is. I'd like to show him the bible passage where Jesus tells peter that he is the rock he will build his church off of. Peter was the first Bishop of Rome(pope). His successors(popes) are continuing the church Christ founded. So Chick is actually condemning members of Christs church.
In one cartoon he says that Jesus calls the Roman Catholic church the 'Great Whore' and 'Mother of Abominations'. How He knew about RC centuries before it existed is anybody's guess. Incidently, that's not the sort of language I would readily think of the son of God using. Bit shocking really.
I'm of the impression that Chick is a bit schizophrenic. Apparently because the letters IHS are communion wafers, he somehow links the Roman Catholic traditions to the Eqyptian worship of their gods Isis, Horus and Seb, because they also used the letters I, H and S for above-mentioned gods. Another new fact for me - Eqyptians used the alphabet, not hieroglyphics. Also the Babylonian god Baal is thrown in for good measure to really condemn the RC church. Not quite sure how but it's in there.

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0054/0054_01.asp
^Concentration camps were run by the Jesuits, and Hitler was a faithful Roman Catholic just following the Council of Trent.

That seems a bit farfetched, even for Chick.

In one cartoon he says that Jesus calls the Roman Catholic church the 'Great Whore' and 'Mother of Abominations'. How He knew about RC centuries before it existed is anybody's guess. Incidently, that's not the sort of language I would readily think of the son of God using. Bit shocking really.
I'm of the impression that Chick is a bit schizophrenic. Apparently because the letters IHS are communion wafers, he somehow links the Roman Catholic traditions to the Eqyptian worship of their gods Isis, Horus and Seb, because they also used the letters I, H and S for above-mentioned gods. Another new fact for me - Eqyptians used the alphabet, not hieroglyphics. Also the Babylonian god Baal is thrown in for good measure to really condemn the RC church. Not quite sure how but it's in there.


LOL. That was a good one about the alphabet and the egyptians. Another funny thing is that Chick apparently hasn't read his bible lately because it says the antichrist will be a man. Chick calls the pope the antichrist. The papacy is an office, so if he wanted to do that he'd have to say all the popes were antichrists. Like Pope Clemet VI because............."HE SHELTERED JEWS TO SAVE THEM FROM BEING BURNED!" He then says Catholics ran the concentration camps. Little bit of a contradiction eh? And if he wants to call the pope the antichrist he is calling St. Peter the antichrist as well, you know Peter, Jesus's head disiple. I don't think our lord Jesus likes that very much.

No, it stated they were being kidnapped and sent to Saudi Arabia. Your own bias inserted the Saudi royalty part. You must be dumb to the fact that Saudi Arabia is a rich nation where you are much more likely to see people driving Hummers than Hondas. The story does not mention the muslim religion, or royalty at all, your own biases have inserted that into the story.
My bad, I misread the word kind as king.

"Flanders to God, Flanders to God, Get off your cloud and save my Todd!"




That was the quote I was looking for.

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0055/0055_01.asp

He described Lucy as a 3ft tall chimpanzee. This guy knows absolutely nothing and is trying to preach about fake facts.

His entire chart on human evolution is made up facts.

This bit's good.
Little boy to girl:
"We all go to Heaven, right?"
"No Timmy, most people will end up in Hell"

What a fantastic line!

From Apes, Lies and Ms Hen
http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/1051/1051_01.asp
Apparently God made Dinosuars and Man on the same day 6000 years ago. Says so in the Bible evidently.

Great final line, too:
"if YOU believe in Evolution instead of Jesus, you'll end up in Hell."

I wonder what's the point of having the tick box below the cartoon that says 'Do you accept Jesus Christ as your own personal saviour' Yes/No?
I mean is he really interested in those of us that don't? I suppose he'll send hundreds of offensive and bloody cartoons about burning in Hell if you tick 'No'.
You know, I'm tempted.


Jack Chick is just scaring people away from Christ with comics like this. Christ wants people to enter heaven. Thats why he died for us. Not so Chick can scare people by saying everyone goes to hell. I just want people to know that Chick does not represent Christianity, just like Osama does not represent Islam. I actually have friends who think Chick works for the devil. I wonder what he'd say to that. My friend was reading a chick tract and he said he felt a horrible evil presence come over him. I don't think he works for the devil, I just think he is an embarassment to our Lord.

Oh, and I found one more of Chick's contradictions. He says he is against church unity because it is really a conspiracy to get everyone united under the pope. But Christ prayed for all the churches to be united as one in the Bible! Way to go Chick.

[url]-Throw a bible in a living room, or even mention it, and all domestic violence ends.
Yep, because women are to submit to their husbands in everything.

That is priceless!
http://www.chick.com/tractimages9587/1020/1020_19.gif
http://www.chick.com/tractimages9587/1020/1020_21.gif

1) Notice that the little girl looks like Little Orphan Annie?
2) Chick tracts are as much fun as the ones you get in Times Square that swear that UPC symbols are the mark of the devil, and that we will all be marked by....

*looks up at Jennifer Government logo*

RUN!!!!!

hahaha... yes. in this comic religion really does encourage people to uhm...think for themselves...
"ok, lord" ... 'whatever you say, lord' 'sure thing, lord'... :D

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0082/0082_01.asp

What...is...chick...smoking. I just read his last rites comic and it portrayed Catholicism in such a false way that I wanted to personally e-mail chick. As a Catholic and a Christian who tries to go to mass once a week I found so many flaws with this comic it is not funny. Here goes-

- When John (the catholic who dies) gets last rites, the priest giving it says "I have forgiven all of his sins." A priest would never say that! The whole point of the sacraments is that GOD works through the priest. The priest is just his tool. The priest does not actually do it! It is not the priest who forgives sins, but God. And it even has the last rites ritual in the bible, see book of James!

- This same priest says "All his life John faithfully served holy mother church." Another line a priest would never say! He might say he served God, but he would never say "he served holy mother church."

- In the comic later on, John says he performed good works. God tells him good works don't matter. Apparently the book of James disagrees with Chick once again.

- John says he confessed his sins to a priest, and God becomes angry and says no man can forgive sins. Jesus gave his disicples the power to forgive sins. Chick screwed up again.

- Here is the worst part. Chick promotes himself in this comic. God tells John that "his faithfull servant" chick warned him but he did not listen. So now John goes to hell.

- At the end this priest appears once again and tells the mass that John will go to heaven for "serving the one true church." THE PRIEST WOULD NOT SAY THAT EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He would say for serving God.

Seriously, Chick has probably never been to a Catholic mass how would he know what goes on?

If people would just give their kids guns and teach them to shoot strangers on sight that sort of thing would never happen.

Haha! That would be so much fun!

"Hey! I had never seen that guy in the corner!" "Shoot him, Jimmy, shoot him!"

"This is not the regular school bus driver!" Bang!

"Kids, I want to introduce you to a new student..." Bang!

What...is...chick...smoking.
'Shrooms.

I thought so...

Nah. He's been doing "Jesus in a Blender" drawings for years. And Mel is an evil devil worshipper, according to Chick.
So Jesus is a frog....that could make for a great parody..

1) Notice that the little girl looks like Little Orphan Annie?
2) Chick tracts are as much fun as the ones you get in Times Square that swear that UPC symbols are the mark of the devil, and that we will all be marked by....

*looks up at Jennifer Government logo*

RUN!!!!!

That was in a Korn video...Freak on a Leash, I think.

That is priceless!
http://www.chick.com/tractimages9587/1020/1020_19.gif
http://www.chick.com/tractimages9587/1020/1020_21.gif
I wish God would tell me to do things at such opportune times...
:p

What makes Chick so sure he's right anyway?

What makes Chick so sure he's right anyway?
Isn't it obvious?
He *has* to be right since he mentions God and Jesus so often!
Or at least that seems to be his reasoning...
:p

Well according to his reasoning then us Catholics are right too. We mention them a lot. Oh wait, we're wrong though because Chick said so!

the most truly pricless line yet "*See Dr. Kent Hovind's Creation Seminar videos"

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0045/0045_01.asp

No problem, Master, time is running out for Ashley. She has taken over 60 trips on LSD - mixed with speed!

Her brain and arteries are starting to gel; she's already having flashbacks. It shouldn't be too much longer!

What the hell? Brain and arteries gelling? Now that is a wondeful example of fear-mongering...

Well according to his reasoning then us Catholics are right too. We mention them a lot. Oh wait, we're wrong though because Chick said so!
You're getting it now!
:D

I LOVE THEM!!!

No seriously, these are comedy GOLD, its such an excellent mix of general ignorance of other religions and science in general with a feverish conviction and poor logic. With an ample sprinkling of poor art and dialogue.

And i can now inform the world that Buddhists actually worship Buddha as God and think that the more good deeds they do the more browny pionts they store up for the next. I had previously thought this was a complete fallacy but after reading this wonderful comic my ideas of Buddhism have been turned on their head, and gay people, their ARE out to kill us all after all, how can i have not seen this before.

LMAO

tv is the tool of the devil to deliver bewitched and i dream of jeannie to the unsuspecting millions so they will be come witches!

I LOVE THEM!!!

No seriously, these are comedy GOLD, its such an excellent mix of general ignorance of other religions and science in general with a feverish conviction and poor logic. With an ample sprinkling of poor art and dialogue.

And i can now inform the world that Buddhists actually worship Buddha as God and think that the more good deeds they do the more browny pionts they store up for the next. I had previously thought this was a complete fallacy but after reading this wonderful comic my ideas of Buddhism have been turned on their head, and gay people, their ARE out to kill us all after all, how can i have not seen this before.
Oh yeah, we want to murder you for some oddly unexplained reason. And take over your cities. And evil Satanic stuff like that.

Oh yeah, there's the whole thing with the demons on the shoulder in that one comic strip... That too. You just can't see them.

Some of these strips bring an interesting new meaning to deus ex machina.

Which one has the demon on the sholder ive imssed it, thats one i must see.

But for now excuse me ive got to go give blood before i die of AIDs.

LMAO

tv is the tool of the devil to deliver bewitched and i dream of jeannie to the unsuspecting millions so they will be come witches!
And obviously it's a really bad thing too! Witches worship Satan, they just won't tell anybody until they're brainwashed and conditioned! And they murder people and ritually abuse them in ceremonies too!

Wow! I've used more exclamation poits in this one paragraph than I have in the rest of my life! But it makes it much more believable!

Doesn't it?
:D

Sorry, I find this too funny for words, despite the serious conatations of the mans work....

I don't really find it funny. I actually find it sad. I agree with him on a few (only a few) things. For instance we both oppose abortion, we both oppose gay marraige (although I thought the demon thing was stupid), and we both think Christ is the savior. Thats about it. I don't agree with him saying all muslims are evil, I don't agree that budhists are evil, I certainly don't agree Roman Catholics are evil, I don't agree Jehova's Witnesses are evil, I don't agree tv is evil, ect.

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0058/0058_01.asp


Kids love Halloween because it's both fun and scary.
"Twick or tweet!"
But they have no idea what's behind this celebration.

To Satanists and witches, Halloween is no joke.
It's their most solemn ceremony of the year.

As we get closer to the Second Coming of Jesus...
Satanism will increase.
So will human sacrifice!

Halloween started in the British Isles with the Druids.
Those guys were really spooky.

October 31st was a night of terror called "Samhain." That night...
"No! Help me!"
the Druids went house to house, taking victims for human sacrifice.

In exchange for the victim, they left a Jack-O-Lantern...
which was supposed to protect the home from death demons that night.

Satan loves Halloween because it glamorizes the powers of darkness, drawing little kids into his camp.
[picture of child with stick drawing an inverted pentacle, an inverted cross, and the words "Satan Lives."]
And it's paying off! Witchcraft is exploding among teens today.


(err, did I transcribe that anywhere near right? I did it by memory.)

That is incorrect on so many levels...
:(
Why, why do we have so many people wishing to shove beliefs down other's throats at the expense of rational reasoning?

Sorry, I find this too funny for words, despite the serious conatations of the mans work....
Serious?
I sincerely hope nobody takes him fully seriously...
That would be rather a disaster even for most Christians, I would think. This guy is rather a looney...

LOL isnt it wonderful to hear completely untrue things said by people who think theyre right.

Woh, why is that druid carrying an ankh, did kemet travel to the UK whilst i wasnt looking ?

rofl, "camp basil bub"

no one will expect anything there...

im sorry, most of these are just sad but the halloween one is laugh out loud funny.
"oh sata nwe sacrifice this cat to you-" BAM a guy in black with what looks like a wooden pirate sword wearing a giant pumpkin on his head bursts in

LMFAO

Halloween has become so secularized it isn't a threat anymore. I personally think kids shouldn't dress up as devils and witches and murderers, but I could care less if a little pirate shows up at my door asking for candy. I'm not going to be an ass like Chick and stuff a tract in their bag. Halloween in America isn't harming anyone.

HahahHAHhaHA!!! Religious fanatics are SO funny :D scary in a way though :( .

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0046/0046_01.asp
Oh, bloody Hell. All we need is another person condemning role-playing games as Satanic tools...


THE INTENSE OCCULT TRAINING THROUGH D&D PREPARED DEBBIE TO ACCEPT THE INVITATION FROM A WITCHS' COVEN.
"I've brought Elfstar to be a priestess and a witch."
"Welcome, Elfstar. You're now a priestess of the craft, and of the Temple of Diana."

That fast? Damn, that was a short initiation...


"No, Marcie! You didn't have to do that!"

It's my fault Black Leaf died. I can't face life alone!
Marcie

A kid that unstable probably shouldn't be playing a game like that...
Maybe checkers would be a better choice for her.


http://www.chick.com/articles/dnd.asp

Oh, seriously. Grow up, Chick.'

Nobody seems to have yet realized that you *don't* carry out occult rituals! It's a game!

HahahHAHhaHA!!! Religious fanatics are SO funny :D scary in a way though :( .
It's deeply scary. They're wrecking everything not only for people that don't happen to follow their religion, but for people that do as well. Usually the only people that get much out of it are themselves. Religion is a good thing, but it's not meant to be used against others in that way.

Lol I found another Chick contradiction. He attacks muslims in the Islam section for destroying middle ages Christian churches and killing priests.
(Remember in the Middle Ages all of Europe was Catholic)

Then in the Catholicism section he says Catholics are not and never where Christian. So where the churches the Muslims destroyed Christian or not?

Hmmmmmmmmmmm. You can't say both Chick.

No you cannot attack Chicks logic for he is God... i'm off to start a cult that worships is golden figure, its what he'd want.

From now on i wish to be refered to as AkhunChick high preist of the true God.

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0273/0273_01.asp
Another homosexual-demonizing one... Ho-hum.


"12% of the little boys and girls growing up are going to be lesbians and homosexuals...
...and they are not going to be called faggots, dykes, queers, and sissies.
WE ARE GOING TO SAVE OUR CHIDLREN."

What in the nine Hells?
12%- Wrong.
Not going to be called names they don't like- Well, that's one of your exalted Christian values, Chick. Why don't you uphold them?


"If reasearch money for AIDS is not coming in at a certin level by a certain date, all gay males need to give blood.
Whatever is required to get national attention is valid. If that includes blood terrorism, so be it."
"Man, they're threatening to infect our national blood supply... with AIDS!
That's cold-blooded MURDER!"

1) No threat of this sort has ever been made by any reputable group in my knowledge.
2) What, so we're the only ones with AIDS? Go get yourself checked, Chick... Straights get it too. We're no more at risk than you are.
3) We have the national attention, whether or not we want it or you want us to.

No you cannot attack Chicks logic for he is God... i'm off to start a cult that worships is golden figure, its what he'd want.

From now on i wish to be refered to as AkhunChick high preist of the true God.
Oh, mighty AkhunChick, forgive me of my sins against the great god Chick!
Oh wait...
Naah, i'm already in TWitches' cult. We get free pie.

Woh, why is that druid carrying an ankh, did kemet travel to the UK whilst i wasnt looking ?
Yeah.
Just hopped on a plane and flew right up for an overnight.
:p

Oh, mighty AkhunChick, forgive me of my sins against the great god Chick!
Oh wait...
Naah, i'm already in TWitches' cult. We get free pie.

You will not be forgiven your sins, your disbelief made baby jesus cry, that makes you a pedophile, which means your going to extra hell.

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0046/0046_01.asp
Oh, bloody Hell. All we need is another person condemning role-playing games as Satanic tools...


That fast? Damn, that was a short initiation...


A kid that unstable probably shouldn't be playing a game like that...
Maybe checkers would be a better choice for her.


http://www.chick.com/articles/dnd.asp

Oh, seriously. Grow up, Chick.'

Nobody seems to have yet realized that you *don't* carry out occult rituals! It's a game!


The best part about that one, is that it promotes book-burning.

Now, THAT is class.

1) No threat of this sort has ever been made by any reputable group in my knowledge.
2) What, so we're the only ones with AIDS? Go get yourself checked, Chick... Straights get it too. We're no more at risk than you are.
3) We have the national attention, whether or not we want it or you want us to.


Don't you know that Osama bin Laden is actually a semi-jewish homosexual D&D obsessed kidnapper-priest, and all gey men are his minions of doom?

And obviously straight people would only get AIDS if they were deliberately infected by the evil poof liberation front (almost certainly all CATHOLICS!). No straight man could recieve any form of sexual disease through irresponsible sexual morals, as long as they BELIVE IN THE BABY JESUS.

Chick's amazing. I'm still not completely sure if he's serious.

Did anyone see the Anit-Abortion one? The Who Murdered Clarece comic?

The Supreme Court Justice was sent to Hell cause he allowed Abortion.

Abortion Doctors go to hell cause God doesn't believe in America's laws.

Quote, "Germany is rebuked for its past, but look at its new holocaust."

This guy is funny.

The best part about that one, is that it promotes book-burning.

Now, THAT is class.
Book-burning- The Wave of the Future!

Just look at Fahrenheit 451...

Has anyone ever seen a real person with a sign saying 'celebrate sodomy'?

And I love the idea that gay-pride rallies are an incitement to hatred against Christ, and the automatic reaction in a crisis is to start preaching.

And the guy from the village people is in there! Possibly as the very image of Satan himself, for his foul slur in "WMCA" by suggesting homosexuals are welcome there like REAL PEOPLE. And of course the implication in the parabel of Sodom that all gay men also automatically indulge in child abuse when they can't find a rape victim.

Did anyone see the Anit-Abortion one? The Who Murdered Clarece comic?

The Supreme Court Justice was sent to Hell cause he allowed Abortion.

Abortion Doctors go to hell cause God doesn't believe in America's laws.

Quote, "Germany is rebuked for its past, but look at its new holocaust."

This guy is funny.


I actually agree with him here.

Don't worry, for you can tell if someone is gay as he has a largish demon crawling all over him.

This is the word of Chick

Don't worry, for you can tell if someone is gay as he has a largish demon crawling all over him.

This is the word of Chick
Yeah, the damn thing keeps obstructing my movement...
It's pretty heavy too.
Such is the price you pay...

I wonder what Chick has to say about the Catholic church performing exorcisms? If we are run by the devil then why do we denounce him in mass and drive him and his demons away from innocents during exorcisms?

I wonder what Chick has to say about the Catholic church performing exorcisms? If we are run by the devil then why do we denounce him in mass and drive him and his demons away from innocents during exorcisms?

A such tragic delusion, you think you are exosising demons but in fact only Chick can do that, your prayers do nothing.

This is the word of Chick

Jesus loves Homosexuals, and he want's to set them free....

By restricting their rights, sending them to Hell and forcing them to lead desperately unhappy double-lives pretending to be straight.

Man, gotta love that Jesus. What a card.

Jesus loves Homosexuals, and he want's to set them free....

By restricting their rights, sending them to Hell and forcing them to lead desperately unhappy double-lives pretending to be straight.

Man, gotta love that Jesus. What a card.

As far as I can see, if you really do buy into Chick's view of the world, EVERYONE (even his christians) lives a desperately unhappy double-life - pretending to be something.

Looks to me like Chick is the founder of a Church of Misery.

As far as I can see, if you really do buy into Chick's view of the world, EVERYONE (even his christians) lives a desperately unhappy double-life - pretending to be something.

Looks to me like Chick is the founder of a Church of Misery.

! Chick talks only of freedom and happiness. Those unhappy people that live double lives and what not are clearly sinners and therefore do not deserve happiness.

This is the word of Chick

why is it that the more that I read Jack Chick, the more I think he has Jesus confused with Joseph Stalin.

! Chick talks only of freedom and happiness. Those unhappy people that live double lives and what not are clearly sinners and therefore do not deserve happiness.

This is the word of Chick


Especially that evil arch-sinner, Steve Jackson. He though he merely created role-playing games and a variety of diverting but amusing comedy card games, but no! He's actually the master of a free-masonic cult of dark witches. Luckily, his lies have been exposed by the Great Chick.

why is it that the more that I read Jack Chick, the more I think he has Jesus confused with Joseph Stalin.

The Great Chick Confuses Nothing

This is the word of Chick

That may be because the God he worships is one that's half based on the bible and half based on "How to cause people annoyance with your intolerant preaching in 12 easy steps"

Those were not the words of Chick

Especially that evil arch-sinner, Steve Jackson. He though he merely created role-playing games and a variety of diverting but amusing comedy card games, but no! He's actually the master of a free-masonic cult of dark witches. Luckily, his lies have been exposed by the Great Chick.

Now you're getting it, welcome to the church of Chick, all you have to do now is take these concerns to your local MP and lobby until he has Steve Jackson sentenced to death and RP games and the like banned from your state/county.

This is the word of Chick

Whats more worrying is that people DO do this, lobbying your local MP on matters of religion is a selfish thing to do (in most circumstances, IE forcing homosexuality not to be mentioned in schools)

Those were not the words of Chick

The Great Chick Confuses Nothing

This is the word of Chick

That may be because the God he worships is one that's half based on the bible and half based on "How to cause people annoyance with your intolerant preaching in 12 easy steps"

Those were not the words of Chick


Damned Chickist Missionaries. I reckon you've misinterpreted the words of Chick. It's time for a schism, so that I can denounce you as being a devil-worshiping sodomite and kill hundreds of your kind without feeling the slightest remorse.

Damned Chickist Missionaries. I reckon you've misinterpreted the words of Chick. It's time for a schism, so that I can denounce you as being a devil-worshiping sodomite and kill hundreds of your kind without feeling the slightest remorse.

What! Thats our job... i hereby denounce you for your un-Chickly thoughts.

This is the word of Chick

One question is, who has bought his tracts and quite seriously what does he expect to achieve by writing them?

Those were not the words of Chick

Believe in Jesus through fundamental Christianity and you'll pass high school. Sweet bearded Allah, these guys piss me off.

One question is, who has bought his tracts and quite seriously what does he expect to achieve by writing them?

Those were not the words of Chick
I once thought of buying some to laugh at.
Then I remembered something.
'I'm not going to give my fucking money to this freak!"
So I just laugh at them over the internet.

What! Thats our job... i hereby denounce you for your un-Chickly thoughts.

This is the word of Chick

One question is, who has bought his tracts and quite seriously what does he expect to achieve by writing them?

Those were not the words of Chick


I'm going to buy them. I think that he's utterly hillarious.

And all to true. I played D&D once, but I realised the madness had to stop when all the other players killed themselves and I started living in a vast tower of skulls, using foul genetic experiments to try and breed the ultimate Orc so I could conquer Middle Earth and annihilate all others. Lord of the Rings was a documentary, didn't you know? It was originally going to be called "When D&D players Attack!"

What! Thats our job... i hereby denounce you for your un-Chickly thoughts.

This is the word of Chick

One question is, who has bought his tracts and quite seriously what does he expect to achieve by writing them?

Those were not the words of Chick

I really don't know what he is trying to achieve. When I talk about my faith to people and when I have tried to get someone to convert I speak of how much Jesus loves them. I don't threaten them with fire and brimstone and sulfer and say you are going to hell if you don't listen to me. "Judge lest ye not be judged." Chick, whether he claims it or not, does not decide who goes to heaven and who goes to hell. Only God does, and last time I checked, he never endorsed Jack Chick.

I really don't know what he is trying to achieve. When I talk about my faith to people and when I have tried to get someone to convert I speak of how much Jesus loves them. I don't threaten them with fire and brimstone and sulfer and say you are going to hell if you don't listen to me. "Judge lest ye not be judged." Chick, whether he claims it or not, does not decide who goes to heaven and who goes to hell. Only God does, and last time I checked, he never endorsed Jack Chick.


It must be said, Fire and Brimstone have always been the more effective way in the past. The best way was, of course, always "Believe in my God or I'll kill you", but "Believe in my God or HE'LL kill you" is pretty good too.

Fire and brimstone does not work. I know because I am guilty of it in the past. Believe me, all it does is get people mad at you. You have to show people God loves them and cares about them.

Fire and brimstone does not work. I know because I am guilty of it in the past. Believe me, all it does is get people mad at you. You have to show people God loves them and cares about them.


Fire and Brimstone worked for the church for 1500 years, mate. It doesn't now because people look at science and suchlike, and they also turn around and say things like "How the bloody hell do YOU know?" When you say that they'll go to hell when they die.

What you should really do is let people make up their own damned minds and leave them alone until they have. Stop spreading the good word, because you've no evidence to back up that it's the right word.

Ugh, that "Last Rites" comic is going to bother me for weeks. Not because I believe it, but because it is so bigoted its not funny. I'd really like to talk to this Chick. Does anyone have his e-mail address?

I am the Pope of Chickism!(i r o n y)
Let me lead you to slaughter those unChickly ones who misinterpret the word of Chick!They must be purged!their demons must be....Poked!

What you should really do is let people make up their own damned minds and leave them alone until they have. Stop spreading the good word, because you've no evidence to back up that it's the right word.
So by your logic, you should stop telling him what to think, and let him. make up his own damn mind. It works both ways, if you don't like christians sharing their ideas and beliefs, then you have an obligation to never share yours.

Oh heck. Just read the anti-evolutionry one. It says you should disbelieve what teachers tell you unless it fits in with the bible.

RABBIT'S DON'T CHEW THE CUD. Teacher's are right about that one, and the Bible is WRONG. Man and Dinosaurs did NOT coexist. Dinosaurs aren't even damned well mentioned directly in the bible, which leads me to suspect the people writing it had never seen them (I'd bloody well mention a 7 meter tall death-lizard at every opportunity if I'd seen one). Hence, they weren't created in the 7 days, so they either pre-date God (impossible), or the bible is NOT completely true.

So by your logic, you should stop telling him what to think, and let him. make up his own damn mind. It works both ways, if you don't like christians sharing their ideas and beliefs, then you have an obligation to never share yours.


If Christians did stop spreading the Good Word, I've have no reason to tell them to stop it, would I?

And I'm not going to tell him what to think. I'm just telling him to stop telling EVERYONE ELSE what to think.

Oh heck. Just read the anti-evolutionry one. It says you should disbelieve what teachers tell you unless it fits in with the bible.

RABBIT'S DON'T CHEW THE CUD. Teacher's are right about that one, and the Bible is WRONG. Man and Dinosaurs did NOT coexist. Dinosaurs aren't even damned well mentioned directly in the bible, which leads me to suspect the people writing it had never seen them (I'd bloody well mention a 7 meter tall death-lizard at every opportunity if I'd seen one). Hence, they weren't created in the 7 days, so they either pre-date God (impossible), or the bible is NOT completely true.
Well, cats aren't mentioned in the Bible.

Maybe Dinosaurs didn't live in the Middle East :p

Ah I see, so when everyone obeys your rules you'll stop advocating them? How kind of you. You don't even realising your doing the same goddamn thing.

Maybe Dinosaurs didn't live in the Middle East :p
"When did ignorance become a point of view"--Dilbert

Well, cats aren't mentioned in the Bible.

Maybe Dinosaurs didn't live in the Middle East :p
Yeah and maybe insects evolved two extra legs since their mention in the bible as four legged creatures. Whoops that would prove evolution correct. The bible is just fucked now.

"When did ignorance become a point of view"--Dilbert
Dunno when?

Yeah and maybe insects evolved two extra legs since their mention in the bible as four legged creatures. Whoops that would prove evolution correct. The bible is just fucked now.
btw.

Did you take me seriously?

Dunno when?
Apparently when you tried voicing your veiws on Paleontology.

Apparently when you tried voicing your veiws on Paleontology.
You took me seriously?

Wow.

Ah I see, so when everyone obeys your rules you'll stop advocating them? How kind of you. You don't even realising your doing the same goddamn thing.

Don't talk utter bullshit. I've not run around telling you what to think, I'm not telling him what to think about the nature of God, and I'm not telling anyone else what to think.

I'm saying that you should let people make up their own minds, rather than trying to convert them. What exactly is wrong with that?

lets link more comics and make fun of them

is it just me or do the crusaders look like they are vice from the 70s or something

lets link more comics and make fun of them
Shameless Plug (http://forums2.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=387874)

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/1020/1020_01.asp
(please oh please I hope this link works. If it doesn't, go to http://www.chick.com/catalog/tractlist.asp -> new

What I learnt from this tract is that:
-Muslims order kidnappers to steal children, but the author seems to have forgotten that by the end of the comic.
-Throw a bible in a living room, or even mention it, and all domestic violence ends.
-God is like a passive Superman.

Why did this remind me of Ned Flanders praying to God to save his Todd? It was in that Simpsons episode where Ned wants to baptise Maggie, if I remember correctly.


God, that was lame.

Don't talk utter bullshit. I've not run around telling you what to think, I'm not telling him what to think about the nature of God, and I'm not telling anyone else what to think.
You just did.

I'm saying that you should let people make up their own minds, rather than trying to convert them. What exactly is wrong with that?
That your ironicly pestering people trying to convert them to your point of veiw. I'll be nice and let you be the first to follow your own advice of stop trying to get people to see it your way by not talking.

Yes, we do have an awesome God.

I was just chatting with him a few days ago and really got the impression that THIS was the kind of deity it'd be cool to worship. Zeus chimed in, but he seemed a bit flaky to me, and then I found out he really couldn't throw thunderbolts like he claimed to be able to do. And Thor just carries a big hammer around all the time.

I was a little torn between Ra and God, but so few people worship Ra these days and I didn't want to be a loner. Plus those Anubites with human bodies and dog heads were a bit spooky.

Yeah, God rocks! Can I get a whoop whoop! Can I get a G--O--D! Hellz yeah, that's what I'm talkin about!!! ;)

Yep, just read 'Allah had no son' for further confirmation of that.
http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0042/0042_01.asp

ROFLMAO! I dare Chick to try that in a mosque. Or near a mosque.

That your ironicly pestering people trying to convert them to your point of veiw. I'll be nice and let you be the first to follow your own advice of stop trying to get people to see it your way by not talking.


There's a tremendous amount of difference between a reactionary statement to those who would pressurise you into believing something, and the initial pressurisation. Comparing the two is like comparing La Resistance in France to the SS because they both had guns.

ROFLMAO! I dare Chick to try that in a mosque. Or near a mosque.

I get the feeling Chick only goes near Mosques with lighters and 50 gallons of petroleum.

There's a tremendous amount of difference between a reactionary statement to those who would pressurise you into believing something, and the initial pressurisation. Comparing the two is like comparing La Resistance in France to the SS because they both had guns.
No its like comparing The SS to the Chechnya.
Him: I don't want to hear non-christian opinions
You: I don't want to hear christian opinions
If you such an Allodoxaphobe, start with your own.

I get the feeling Chick only goes near Mosques with lighters and 50 gallons of petroleum.

Chick travel to mosques merely to try and inform the poor suffering muslims who must be saved from their delusions.

This is the word of Chick

Why can evangelists not understand they convert no-one. Oh and by the way, has anyone every seen a Buddhist preaching like an evangelic chistian or someone like that? I'm interested to know.

Those were not the words of Chick

Why can evangelists not understand they convert no-one. Oh and by the way, has anyone every seen a Buddhist preaching like an evangelic chistian or someone like that? I'm interested to know.

Those were not the words of Chick


I've been stopped in the street by Buddists trying to convert me, actually. They're weird. They all seem to be off their tits on morphine, or something. If meditation is as good as they make it look, why don't we sell it in Harlem at 30 bucks a gram?

even seen the Krishna's? When did everyone become so weak willed that their afraid that their ability to form there own opinion could be overshadowed by someone giving you information.

I've been stopped in the street by Buddists trying to convert me, actually. They're weird. They all seem to be off their tits on morphine, or something. If meditation is as good as they make it look, why don't we sell it in Harlem at 30 bucks a gram?

O.O That's quite odd. Hare Krishnas i've seen, but Buddhists, well its a big world.

Those were not the words of Chick

O.O That's quite odd. Hare Krishnas i've seen, but Buddhists, well its a big world.

Those were not the words of Chick

It was only once, in Piccadilly Gardens in Manchester. They'd set up a new centre in the south of the city, and were raising some cash.

Hare Krishna's are all over the place, but they just want to sell you the book and let you do as you will with it.

I like Buddhists, they are right.

I mean, NO! Buddhists are all going to hell, because i say so, and so does Chick.

This is the word of Chick

No i love Buddhists really.

Those are not the words of Chick

You seem torn.

No its like comparing The SS to the Chechnya.
Him: I don't want to hear non-christian opinions
You: I don't want to hear christian opinions
If you such an Allodoxaphobe, start with your own.


No, what I was doing was not saying I don't want to hear Christian views. I don't want to hear Christian conversion speeches. There is a difference. I've no problem with a Christian saying 'Why not believe in God? It's pretty cool, and there's some fringe benefits (get into heaven, church functions, get-out-of-jail free card with the whole confession business)".

I DO have a problem when Christians start treating OTHER PEOPLE's opinions as deeply inferior to their own. I don't go around hunting down Christians and yelling "STOP BELIEVING IN GOD! YOU CAN'T JUSTIFY A SINGLE STATEMENT IN THE BIBLE, AND YOU HAVE NO PROOF A YOUR DIETY'S EXISTENCE!". I have never gone door to door doing so. As far as I'm aware, there are no Athiest groups that raise money to promote Atheism.

Don't go around telling people what to believe. Leave them to do it themselves.

Nasopotamia, are you over stressed? I never tried to convert anyone here. You are like a time bomb that just went off. I made a harmless post and you exploded. I said that when I talked to people about god I don't use fire and brimstone threats. How do you know I go up to random people and try to convert them? Has it ever occured to you that....*gasp*...these people were curious?

Nasopotamia, are you over stressed? I never tried to convert anyone here. You are like a time bomb that just went off. I made a harmless post and you exploded. I said that when I talked to people about god I don't use fire and brimstone threats. How do you know I go up to random people and try to convert them? Has it ever occured to you that....*gasp*...these people were curious?

I'm not talking about you in particular, Commando. Most of these posts use more extreme examples than yourself, and I have no problem with anyone who can respect other people's opinions on religious matters. I'm talking about people like our friend Mr Chick, who follows the fire and brimstone path. IJ disagrees with me saying people like Chick should shut up and stop trying to gain converts.

Oh sorry. I thought you were talking about me this whole time because I said when I talk to others about God I mentioned Jesus's kindness. Sorry about that. I agree with you about Chick, he needs to shut up.

Oh sorry. I thought you were talking about me this whole time because I said when I talk to others about God I mentioned Jesus's kindness. Sorry about that. I agree with you about Chick, he needs to shut up.

It's entirely about how people choose to do it. If I am talking with you about God and you happen to mention something about Jesus kindness, then I'd be a frothing maniac to have a go at you for that. If, on the other hand, you show up at my house uninvited at 10 am on a saturday morning and won't go away until I've not only listen to you go on and on about Jesus for over an hour, but also until I've agreed to sign up and follow your religion, then that pisses me off bigtime. And frankly, I don't give a damn what people believe as long as they'll let me believe what I want.

If, on the other hand, you show up at my house uninvited at 10 am on a saturday morning and won't go away until I've not only listen to you go on and on about Jesus for over an hour, but also until I've agreed to sign up and follow your religion, then that pisses me off bigtime.
If that ever happens to me, and they don't leave when I ask them to, I'm going to fecking call the police.

Did anyone find Chicks e-mail yet?

I dont reckon anything can be gained by emailing Chick himself (apart from eternal damnation)

I'd just like to debate a few things with him.

I'd just like to debate a few things with him.

wouldnt we all, but its a forgone conclusion that he wouldnt listen.

wouldnt we all, but its a forgone conclusion that he wouldnt listen.

Yeah.....

Me- Hello Mr. Chick I'd like to debate a-

Chick- Shut Up!!!!!!!!!! What are you doing here your poisoning the air in my presence!!!!!!

Me- Sorry chick but I accept Jesus as my savior too you kno-

Chick- But your a Catholic! EVIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me- Alright Chick I'll be leaving then.

Chick- GET OUT!!!!!!

*leaves*

I almost feel bad for Chick. He honestly is trying to do the right thing and thinks he is helping everyone but the way he does it makes everyone hate him. If he renounced some of his positions and spoke of Gods love rather than his wrath he could make some pretty nice comics...

If you wish to meet Chick you must talk to me first, I organize his meetings, put on his Anti-cath(TM) suit.I am the High priest of Chick!


*slobbers in a corner*

If you wish to meet Chick you must talk to me first, I organize his meetings, put on his Anti-cath(TM) suit.I am the High priest of Chick!


*slobbers in a corner*

Im sensing an impending religious war...

:D

Chick touched my forhead and anointed me with Anti-cath(TM) oil.Clearly I am his favourite and therefore High Priest and Pope of Irony.

Chick touched my forhead and anointed me with Anti-cath(TM) oil.Clearly I am his favourite and therefore High Priest and Pope of Irony.

!WHAT! I cannot believe your unholy lies... this means war, expect my ninja pirate butlers at your door shortly.

*puts up chair, buys popcorn and soda*

A civil war between chicks followers. This should be interesting.

Fool!I do not lie!Chick spake unto me in a dream:'Gather thy 70-foot robot gorrilas around thee, and promise unto them the gift of robot-monkey-babes galore, and they shall follow thy holy banner'
And I did, and now my army gather..Eth around me, and thy butlers shall be destroyed!Chick himself forsaw it!

*puts up chair, buys popcorn and soda*

A civil war between chicks followers. This should be interesting.

chicks followers? :confused:

Chick touched my forhead and anointed me with Anti-cath(TM) oil.Clearly I am his favourite and therefore High Priest and Pope of Irony.
Hee.
'Anti-cath' makes me think of methcathinone.
:p

Fool!I do not lie!Chick spake unto me in a dream:'Gather thy 70-foot robot gorrilas around thee, and promise unto them the gift of robot-monkey-babes galore, and they shall follow thy holy banner'
And I did, and now my army gather..Eth around me, and thy butlers shall be destroyed!Chick himself forsaw it!

The True Chick will smite ye when judgement day comes, for he sayeth unto his followers.

"I SHALL KILL YOU ALL O.o"

I'll referee this fight.

Chick high priest Ankhmet vs. Chick high priest Fenix

chicks followers? :confused:
Yeah, Chick is God, didn't you hear?
Ask Ankhmet and Fenix.

I think it mostly boils down to a fight between his robot monkeys and my ninja pirate butlers. What more could you ask for.

Mine hands of power shall not touch this heretic!Verily I draw the Anti-cath(TM) handgun of purity, and blow(eth) the false chick's followers to oblivion!or our Lord!

Chick hath gifted my monkeys with the power of hurling their poo!And ROBOT MONKEYS POO TITANIUM BOLTS!

Chick will support me, ill write a letter to him, and he will reply with the holy damnation, which i will then use against you. My plan is fool proof.

*goes off to find Chicks address*

I already told you, I read all of Chick's mail before he does to filter out the Catholic stuff, as I am his assistant and High Priest.And I told him you're a Catholic!

would you believe theres a club at my school called 'the campus crusade for christ' that hands out these little comics as though they hold any actual validity?

fucking rediculous.

Nice to see Chicks voice being heard.

PS. Thats quite depressing, just like the Nazis they "get 'em young"

would you believe theres a club at my school called 'the campus crusade for christ' that hands out these little comics as though they hold any actual validity?

fucking rediculous.
Yay!
Let's give them a standing ovation!
A guerilla standing ovation!
We'll sneak it up on them, then run away!

Blasphemy!Chick is not 'fucking rediculous'!CHICK WILL JUDGE THEE SINNER!

My robot monkeys are after you now.Be warned.

Oh yes sorry.

My ninja pirate butlers will be after you to, expect to be more dead, more damned to eternal suffering, and more politely killed than by this Anit-Chicks monkeys.

All you guys just need to keep in mind that Chick doesn't represent Christianity, just as Osama doesn't represent Islam. I have never met a fellow Christian who likes Jack Chick. We all just feel bad for him. He's like 80 years old and a WW2 veteran who accepted Christ as his savior. The thing that makes everyone dislike him is that the way he tries to get people to follow Christ is wrong and disgusting and embarrasing to our faith.

Excuse me, Mr. Hight Priest sir, I think that the Almighty Jack Chick would condemn your attack robot monkeys as instruments of mechanical origin and therefore blasphemous. Please don't hurt me.

arg its been a long time since i last saw chick shit. all the crap he says about the Catholic church... read that alberto comic :mp5: yes, we are teh whore of babylon and we have a black pope that is controlled by the jesuits and who is the real boss of the Catholics.

this stuff worries me, i first saw it on a christian forum. i certainly don't believe that God would send everyone but Christians to hell, then again, Chick said so.

and with the bible, you get publications like this when you take it word for word and dont understand what was meant to be written. it wasnt written in english to begin with anyway and *shock* the Catholic church was the one to put the bible together.

does that make the bible bad ?

Excuse me, Mr. Hight Priest sir, I think that the Almighty Jack Chick would condemn your attack robot monkeys as instruments of mechanical origin and therefore blasphemous. Please don't hurt me.

Ha, see, now that proves your ungodly. Chick is mine! :P

arg its been a long time since i last saw chick shit. all the crap he says about the Catholic church... read that alberto comic :mp5: yes, we are teh whore of babylon and we have a black pope that is controlled by the jesuits and who is the real boss of the Catholics.

this stuff worries me, i first saw it on a christian forum. i certainly don't believe that God would send everyone but Christians to hell, then again, Chick said so.

and with the bible, you get publications like this when you take it word for word and dont understand what was meant to be written. it wasnt written in english to begin with anyway and *shock* the Catholic church was the one to put the bible together.

does that make the bible bad ?


Lol I know. Like I said earlier I want to show Chick the passage where Christ makes Peter the first Pope. If Chick thinks the Pope is the anticchrist, he has to believe every Pope is the antichrist, as the papacy is an office. So Chick thinks St. Peter is the antihrist! I don't think our lord likes that very much.

Dont let a simple thing like logic get in the way of your faith in Chick. Logic is the tool of the devil.

D'oh! How could I forget?

the best, best one, mobile guillotine

Fools!The robot monkeys are in fact gorrilas in metal suits.Metal forged from the toenails of...Chick!They were summoned from Heaven by Chick and gifted to me.Say not that they are heresies, fool.I shall smite thee!CHICK IS MINE DAMNIT!

*sigh* I'm sure one of Chicks holy writings deals with this situation. And im equally sure it will prove me in the right :P. *gets studying Chicks tracts*

lmao, has anyone seen a crystal ball or ouija board or tarot cards in harry potter? what version was chick reading? the only crystal ball was the one the fraud was using anyway, wow this guys nuts its funny to laugh at him

trelawny isnt that much of a fraud... hehehe

*shock* a catholic that reads harry potter... im definately going to hell now

If that ever happens to me, and they don't leave when I ask them to, I'm going to fecking call the police.
Or you could just not let them leave.

There was no part that said all kidnapped kids are being sent to Saudi Arabia. In this story, there was a child abduction ring that was being run from Saudi Arabia. That doesnt mean that every kidnapped child is sent to Saudi Arabia, as you so ridiculously imply. It also does not have anything to do with religion or being muslim. I think what they wanted to show was that this was an international child kidnapping ring. Why did they choose Saudi Arabia? I dont know for sure. They couldve picked just about any country, they just chose Saudi Arabia.

Of course, if you actually read Jack Chick tracts, the intent behind the reference becomes exceedingly clear.

It gets even better - he has mpegs!
http://www.chick.com/catalog/videos/LOTW.asp#clips
Controversial - See why some churches are afraid to show this film!

"Even though Satan is a defeated foe, God has given him permission to rule over this World's system"
What a nice guy God is: "Sorry about defeating you. Here, you can rule the World through politics"
WTF.


Here's a good bit:
Know any unsaved people who watch TV?
"You can almost feel the crackling flames of hell as you watch!"
(Note to self: Must watch TV more during Winter more to save on heating bills)

Why can evangelists not understand they convert no-one. Oh and by the way, has anyone every seen a Buddhist preaching like an evangelic chistian or someone like that? I'm interested to know.

No, but one did ask me for some money for their temple once. Also all the Buddhists in my apartment building stink the place out every night with the incense they burn on the landings. But that's not really the same as "You're going to burn in HELL!!!"

No, but one did ask me for some money for their temple once. Also all the Buddhists in my apartment building stink the place out every night with the incense they burn on the landings. But that's not really the same as "You're going to burn in HELL!!!"

I like insence, but i suppose you could ask them to try and keep the smell down, as one of the pillars of buddhism requires you do no harm and that you have mindfulness for your actions concequences on others, they should do everything they can from then on to stop the incense smell getting too strong. That doesnt mean they will though, not all buddhist are as nice as they ought to be.

/bump. Hilarious!

I like insence, but i suppose you could ask them to try and keep the smell down, as one of the pillars of buddhism requires you do no harm and that you have mindfulness for your actions concequences on others, they should do everything they can from then on to stop the incense smell getting too strong. That doesnt mean they will though, not all buddhist are as nice as they ought to be.
Nah, I don't mind it so much. It's just that I live in an old 10 storey building where the stairwell(no lift) serves two buildings. So every landing there's two apartments (left and right). And my flat on the 7th floor is the only one without a wee shrine and insense holders and food offerings outside it.
Quite pleasant most of the time, but occasionally when everyone does it at the same time, it can get stinky and set my Asthma off. But it's still kinda cool in it's own way, but I'm still in the immigration phase where everything different is interesting.

Also, as no-one in the building speaks English, I don't know how I could get them to understand to tone their use of insense. Most likely they'd be a bit scared if I started gesticulating and pointing at their shrines. They're mostly elderly Chinese (surprise surprise) and I'm a lot bigger than them.

Halloween has become so secularized it isn't a threat anymore. I personally think kids shouldn't dress up as devils and witches and murderers, but I could care less if a little pirate shows up at my door asking for candy. I'm not going to be an ass like Chick and stuff a tract in their bag. Halloween in America isn't harming anyone.


Some idiot stuffed a tract in my bag one year...my dad tore it up and threw it in the guy's face, saying "it's not your night to preach, old man."

lmao, has anyone seen a crystal ball or ouija board or tarot cards in harry potter? what version was chick reading? the only crystal ball was the one the fraud was using anyway, wow this guys nuts its funny to laugh at him

There were crystal balls in the most recent movie, in divination class, I think. They tried to read tea leaves too.

Some idiot stuffed a tract in my bag one year...my dad tore it up and threw it in the guy's face, saying "it's not your night to preach, old man."
That is awesome.
Go AFS's dad! He deserves a cookie.

There were crystal balls in the most recent movie, in divination class, I think. They tried to read tea leaves too.
Well they do take the piss out of here for it. And it is only the ditzy who enjoy the class with the smartest hating it with a vengeance

That is awesome.
Go AFS's dad! He deserves a cookie.

lol it didn't help that my dad's kinda pagan as well ^_^

lol it didn't help that my dad's kinda pagan as well ^_^
I'd fucking bet it didn't!
:p

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0045/0045_01.asp


...the dead were judge out of those things which were written in the books according to their works.

Did anyone else, at the end of the Bewitched tract, notice this little gem? Doesn't this basically disprove fscking everything he said about Catholics going to hell???

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0045/0045_01.asp



Did anyone else, at the end of the Bewitched tract, notice this little gem? Doesn't this basically disprove fscking everything he said about Catholics going to hell???
Exactly.
But that won't stop the mighty Chick!

Exactly.
But that won't stop the mighty Chick!
Chick is above contradiction, I guess. When there's a discrepancy between what he says and the truth, it's always reality that's got it fucked up.

Nothing can stop Chick. Don't you realise why he so rarely gives interviews, and why no-one gets to take photographs of him? It's so they can sneakily replace him when they get rid of the old one! Jack Chick. Can't you see that it's an anagram of Big Brother? Open your eyes!

Chick is above contradiction, I guess. When there's a discrepancy between what he says and the truth, it's always reality that's got it fucked up.
That was in the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy!
+1 jillion coolness points!

A discrepancy is a glitch in the Matrix. It normally happen when they change something.

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...

We must all worship Chick with his outstanding christian morals! [/sarcasm]

Fenix is obviously the real priest and the giant wombats i converted shall join the righteous cause!

C'mon now.

Let's not talk about Christian Morals if we ourselves are so quick to condemn the man. I heard it said somewhere on this thread - judge not lest ye be judged.

Jesus said that whoever it was who desn't sin cast the first stone. I'll bloody want to see a sinless one around here :)

Instead of talking behind peoples backs, and if we really think that what he's doing is worthy of eternal hellfire, wouldn't the noble thing to do is to drop him a line. I mean, it's irrelevant whether he reads it or he changes or something. I just think that God would rather have the sinner saved than roasted.

Oh, and about that stuff about God sending to hell those who are even the teensiest bit erroneous about their creed... that IS somewhat accurate. God WILL do everything in his domain to rescue every man, woman and gay person on Earth although it should be remembered that God's domain doesn't include Free Will. In simpler terms, God doesn't send people to hell... people choose to go there for some reason.

The thing is, however, that man has no right to condemn.

Not Jack Chick.
Not Us.

Oh, and about that stuff about God sending to hell those who are even the teensiest bit erroneous about their creed... that IS somewhat accurate. God WILL do everything in his domain to rescue every man, woman and gay person on Earth although it should be remembered that God's domain doesn't include Free Will. In simpler terms, God doesn't send people to hell... people choose to go there for some reason.
What?
It sounds like you just said there's no free will, but people choose to go to hell?
Am I confused?

Hmmm? I'm pretty sure what it means is that Gods domain doesn't encompass free will. it's not something that he can influence. So if someone goes to hell, it isn't because he forced them to, it's because they exercised their will to do so.

It feels like a very very tenuous argument to me though.

Hmmm? I'm pretty sure what it means is that Gods domain doesn't encompass free will. it's not something that he can influence. So if someone goes to hell, it isn't because he forced them to, it's because they exercised their will to do so.

It feels like a very very tenuous argument to me though.
Ah, I guess it makes a bit more sense now...

Yeah. God doesn't mess with free will since it is through free will that allows us to enjoy his grace and blessings - that being the entire point of our existence.

Now suffering, on the other hand, is caused by either one's defiance of God's will or the defiance of one's environment of same (which is why bad things happen to good people). Deliverance (offered by Jesus) is the freedom to do God's will even if the whole world seems to do otherwise. Through faith in Jesus, as the Good Book is quick to point out, we are able to prosper and be happy even if Calligula is hankering to feed us to his starving lions.

However, Christians also make mistakes and it is most likely that bad things happen to good people because they do (i.e.: if you eat a beaker full of ebola, you will likely get sick). But that's no biggie. God's quite soft when it comes to a sincerely repentant heart.

Hell, for those of you who ask why such a loving God would make such a place, is the place where God's presence is totally absent. Since the soul is eternal, it has to go somewhere. Since, by choice, some people choose to distance themselves away to God, that is exactly what they get - an eternity of that. The reason why hell is so bad isn't because there are tormentors there or because fire and brimstone takes the place of coca cola there. It is because God isn't there. God loves everybody, yes he does. But he's not going to force anyone to get saved.

Though luck - God is also infinitely fair and, when it all boils down to boiling in brimstone, fair's fair.

It doesn't say clearly, however, what happens to people who never had a chance to meet Jesus or those people who were led away from the faith because his servants where more than a little "unaccomodating" but I bet God can work something out for them, loving father that he is.

There was no part that said all kidnapped kids are being sent to Saudi Arabia. In this story, there was a child abduction ring that was being run from Saudi Arabia. That doesnt mean that every kidnapped child is sent to Saudi Arabia, as you so ridiculously imply. It also does not have anything to do with religion or being muslim.

because saudia arabia is the famously liberal secular state?

its not a big leap to make and i'm fairly sure that was the intent of the author

I think when we get to the piont of free will and God im afraid you're all going to have to go away and read Perelandra (voyage to venus) by CS Lewis, this explains the whole situation quite well.

As for ASF's father... He is teh greatest !

And as for my official comment upon the situation thus far.

How dare you even speak Chicks great name, thats SO naughty im going to write it down right now...

This is the word of Chick (+1 piont if you spot the reference)

How can you claim high-prisethood of Chick?I GOT THERE FIRST!Yaaaargh!For chick!GO FORTH,ROBOT MONKEYS!

Blashpemy, this is some kind of Anti-Chick trick, i am the true original High Priest of Chick, and the true Church of Chick, henceforth to be known as,

The True Church of Chick.

"There is no way to heaven but through Chi--- no, there is no way to heaven."

Ye gods theres another splinter religion, curently i count TWO blasphemous regimes trying to worship Chick in their evil manner, who are obviously controlled by Satan in some way, or possibly Kali, i cannot tell.

The Emperor Fenix = The Akhun-Chick, High Priest of the True Church of Chick
Ankhmet = High Priest of the Church of Chick
Nasopotomia = Archbishop of the Church of Chick

Anyone else with some hidious schism of my great church speak now or forever hold you peace.

What i have understood from reading some of the posts on this forum is that a number of the writers believe in god and feel that he is just....now im not going to try and disuade your beliefs, but if we are going to accept that god, in some form or another, exists, which i'll do for the sake of argument, must you say he is fair?
firstly, hell and heaven are right here, right now. there is no castle in the sky that good, church-going people get to prance around in with wing, nor is there some sort of bad sci-fi fire pit. i mean can one truly beleive this? and then, isnt getting a little crowded...also i cant think that only people who have 'found jesus' get blessed. do you mean to say that, for example, buddist monks who never harm any other living creature and live in quiet peace, are doomed to the eternal stench of brimstone? thats rediculous.
now i dont have enough time to dismantle everything United Grandavia said, so ill just have a bit more about the bible, namely the old testament.
There is only one god right? then explain this to me: "I am a jealous God", thats one of the 10 comandments if there were really just one god, what would he be jealous of? is every other faith simply fake concoctions? speaking of, i would liek to point out that the bible was written at the hand of man, not some superhuman being, just men. men which altered historical facts and helped jump-start the masculine superiority. Mary Magdalene was not a prossie, she was from a wealthy family. there was never such thing as witches and an eye for an eye leaves the world blind
think about it

See, the CSI frenzy has reached even into the heart of Chick. And lo, it is awesome.

What i have understood from reading some of the posts on this forum is that a number of the writers believe in god and feel that he is just....now im not going to try and disuade your beliefs, but if we are going to accept that god, in some form or another, exists, which i'll do for the sake of argument, must you say he is fair?
firstly, hell and heaven are right here, right now. there is no castle in the sky that good, church-going people get to prance around in with wing, nor is there some sort of bad sci-fi fire pit. i mean can one truly beleive this? and then, isnt getting a little crowded...also i cant think that only people who have 'found jesus' get blessed. do you mean to say that, for example, buddist monks who never harm any other living creature and live in quiet peace, are doomed to the eternal stench of brimstone? thats rediculous.
now i dont have enough time to dismantle everything United Grandavia said, so ill just have a bit more about the bible, namely the old testament.
There is only one god right? then explain this to me: "I am a jealous God", thats one of the 10 comandments if there were really just one god, what would he be jealous of? is every other faith simply fake concoctions? speaking of, i would liek to point out that the bible was written at the hand of man, not some superhuman being, just men. men which altered historical facts and helped jump-start the masculine superiority. Mary Magdalene was not a prossie, she was from a wealthy family. there was never such thing as witches and an eye for an eye leaves the world blind
think about it

Let's just look at the eye for an eye quote for a moment. An eye for an eye was justice for the people in that time. Prior to Moses bring that law justice was revenge and revenge might mean killing the transgressor and his whole family for the slightest transgression.

I don't believe every religion is fake. I think theyall have comefrom God. Different names, different times, different places, different social laws, same spiritual truths renewed, same God. Budhha said he would return some day and He did.

Ye gods theres another splinter religion, curently i count TWO blasphemous regimes trying to worship Chick in their evil manner, who are obviously controlled by Satan in some way, or possibly Kali, i cannot tell.

The Emperor Fenix = The Akhun-Chick, High Priest of the True Church of Chick
Ankhmet = High Priest of the Church of Chick
Nasopotomia = Archbishop of the Church of Chick

Anyone else with some hidious schism of my great church speak now or forever hold you peace.


You dare to speak the name of Blessed Chick? Evil-doer! I've drawn some cartoons of you making up puppies to kidnap little girls!!

You dare to speak the name of Blessed Chick? Evil-doer! I've drawn some cartoons of you making up puppies to kidnap little girls!!

What came first the chick or the egg?

What came first the chick or the egg?

Know you not that the Egg is in fact a HOMOSEXUAL Egg, spreading it's lies and filth about Evolution, and your question implies that you have become tainted!!? BURN HIM!

Know you not that the Egg is in fact a HOMOSEXUAL Egg, spreading it's lies and filth about Evolution, and your question implies that you have become tainted!!? BURN HIM!

Let's not get too hasty here. My eggs are meant for omelletes and nothing else.

Let's not get too hasty here. My eggs are meant for omelletes and nothing else.

That's what they WANT you to think. Every egg you eat is tantmount to ABORTION, fiend!

I think when we get to the piont of free will and God im afraid you're all going to have to go away and read Perelandra (voyage to venus) by CS Lewis, this explains the whole situation quite well.

As for ASF's father... He is teh greatest !

And as for my official comment upon the situation thus far.

How dare you even speak Chicks great name, thats SO naughty im going to write it down right now...

This is the word of Chick (+1 piont if you spot the reference)

I'd like to think that you were also reciting doctrine of Arnold Judas Rimmer, there. :)

hey

i :sniper:

THIS IS A RAID!! NEO-CHICKISTS ATTACK!!!!

:sniper: :sniper: :mp5: :mp5: :mp5: :mp5: :mp5: :mp5: :mp5:


The threat of sectarian violence again plagues the Chickists. Sigh.