NationStates Jolt Archive

Every year more than 2500 left handed people are killed from using right handed products.


Post your own funny or made up or useless etc "facts"

75% of all statistics are made up on the spot.

75% of all statistics are made up on the spot.97% of all people know that

97% of all people know that

50% of people dispute that statistic when I cite it.

100% of this topic is idiotic.

*flees*

One funny fact that used to annoy the hell out of me was when you see some mother berating her kid for pulling funny faces by saying "if the wind changes your face will stay like that!"
Wonder if they would say the same thing to stroke victims?

100% of this topic is idiotic.

*flees*
Don't upset me. I'm running out of places to hide the bodies :D

It is illegal to walk on the right hand side of a footpath where I live.

Don't upset me. I'm running out of places to hide the bodies :D
careful- remember what happened to my bodyhiding thread;)

Eskimos use refrigators to stop food from freezing.

Queensland is a state in Australia, look at the top right of the country. We are responsible for Fourex (XXXX), the great barrier reef (or irresponsible), Premier Peter Beattie (Yay!) and Sir Joe. These are true facts that I learnt in HS, but may not be correct anymore.

In Queensland cattle and sheep have right of way on roads (the law isn't changed because then farmers would have to fence their livestock).

In Queensland it is illegal to go outside after dark wearing slippers while either waering a mask/balaclava or while holding a wrench/crowbar/other tool (this is a relic of settlement days, it was intent to break and enter, after all you wouldn't sneak into someone's house wearing your noisey workboots).

In Queensland it is to be illegal to walk down the Queen Street mall with less than $2 on your person (if you were not there to buy things, it was assumed you were there to steal).

It was also illegal to legally make enough money to live on (the assumption being that if you could not make enough money to live on legaly you would make money illegally).

guys thing about......ex....every..........69.......sexonds sorry i forget sorry minds somewhere else

It was also illegal to legally make enough money to live on (the assumption being that if you could not make enough money to live on legaly you would make money illegally).

http://www.click-smilies.de/sammlung0304/sprachlos/speechless-smiley-022.gif

5/4 of the population have trouble with fractions.

Also, in Fairbanks, AK, my hometown, it is illegal to have a moose on the sidewalk.

5/4 of the population have trouble with fractions.

Also, in Fairbanks, AK, my hometown, it is illegal to have a moose on the sidewalk.


too bad for my friend david i guess he couldn't go out with his g/f in fairbanks (we called her a moose)

too bad for my friend david i guess he couldn't go out with his g/f in fairbanks (we called her a moose)
Thats harsh :p

Queensland is a state in Australia, look at the top right of the country. We are responsible for Fourex (XXXX), the great barrier reef (or irresponsible), Premier Peter Beattie (Yay!) and Sir Joe. These are true facts that I learnt in HS, but may not be correct anymore.

In Queensland cattle and sheep have right of way on roads (the law isn't changed because then farmers would have to fence their livestock).

In Queensland it is illegal to go outside after dark wearing slippers while either waering a mask/balaclava or while holding a wrench/crowbar/other tool (this is a relic of settlement days, it was intent to break and enter, after all you wouldn't sneak into someone's house wearing your noisey workboots).

In Queensland it is to be illegal to walk down the Queen Street mall with less than $2 on your person (if you were not there to buy things, it was assumed you were there to steal).

It was also illegal to legally make enough money to live on (the assumption being that if you could not make enough money to live on legaly you would make money illegally).

The A.C.T. - Australian Capitol Territory - is a territory in Australia, look at the middle right of the country. We are responsible for holding parliment, the ANU (rated 16th uni in the world recently I think), Prime Minister Gough Whitlam - well, he was from NSW, but he went to my school. (Yay!) and yet another Labor seat. These are true facts that I learnt in HS, but may not be correct anymore. (Depite the fact that I'm still there.)

In the ACT, pushbikes have right of way on roads (the law was recently changed along with pretty green lanes for these 'rare creatures' - I quote the ad)

In the ACT, it is impossable to own land, therefore the government can push you off if they find oil or gold deposits. The leasehold is valid for 99 years, after which the property is no longer yours.

The ACT is the only place in Australia where it is legal to own cannabis, two plants per person, and what you do with it in your home is up to you. However, it is illegal to purchase the plant anywhere. It is also the only place in Australia, I believe, where one can legally purchase 'X' rated videos or walk into a brothel.

Finally, in civic, the centre of the city, the local drug dealer use to sit on a bench right outside the police dept. Untill they moved the police dept. across the square, at which point he moved to an appropriate bench outside the new police dept.

Ahhh... The ACT.

Ahhh... The ACT.
the porn and drug capital of Australia, oh and also some politics

the porn and drug capital of Australia, oh and also some politics

Oh Yeah! I can only assume they relaxed the laws so the politicians could get high before sitting and hire a prostitute afterwards. Heck, after watching the House of Reps. (we have the upper and lower houses on cable) I can't imagine they'd act any more diligently in that mosh pit they call parliment
*as the 'honerable' sir whosyfart yells out yet another obscene comment from the peanut gallery* - I'M NOT KIDDING. And I'd certainly need to be relieved of any 'pressure' afterwards.

What I love are those statistics that try to give you reletive size or scope so you can understand stuff better, but they really just make things more confusing. Like,

The Grand Canyon is 44,000 cubic meters in volume. That would take over 2.1 million jellybeans to fill up.

If you took the length you walk in your lifetime, you walk to the moon and back 2.1 times.

A human head of hair, with the hair placed end to end would circle the equator 6 times.

etc.

A Marin County newspaper once listed the movie The Wizard of Oz with the following description:

"Transported to a surreal landscape, a young girl kills the first woman she meets and then teams up with three complete strangers to kill again."

bananas

banana trees are actually herbs, or your american " 'erbs"
banana trees can walk up to 40 cm in thier entire lifetime
bananas will be exitinct in 10 years if nothing is done
bananas can only be germinated and stuff, by animals and humans, as they have no way to do so.
bananas are qutie nice, sometimes
bananas are not good to eat before an exceedingly hard workout on your stomach, mixed with lucozade causes disgusting yet hilarious results

damn, my ancestors really messed up australia. damn us colonisers :headbang:

bananas


bananas are not good to eat before an exceedingly hard workout on your stomach, mixed with lucozade causes disgusting yet hilarious results
thanks for the warning, i was going to do that next weekend

damn, my ancestors really messed up australia. damn us colonisers :headbang:

I'm not sure it was their fault. It was the generation currently in power. Also, another fun fact about the ACT: We have red turning arrows at traffic lights. No Joke, really. It doesn't matter if no one is comming the other way, no turning right (we drive on the left so this is across the opposing lane) untill the little green arrow lights up.
Oh, yet another: In the ACT, at fifteen-and-nine-months you can get a lerner's permit. However, you are not alowed to touch a petrol pump untill sixteen. At seventeen I can get my provisional license. But, if I drive over the boader to NSW (the ACT is one small city plus a bit totally landlocked by NSW) at night, I immidiately break the law because 'P' platers can't drive at night there.

I'm not sure it was their fault. It was the generation currently in power. Also, another fun fact about the ACT: We have red turning arrows at traffic lights. No Joke, really. It doesn't matter if no one is comming the other way, no turning right (we drive on the left so this is across the opposing lane) untill the little green arrow lights up.
Oh, yet another: In the ACT, at fifteen-and-nine-months you can get a lerner's permit. However, you are not alowed to touch a petrol pump untill sixteen. At seventeen I can get my provisional license. But, if I drive over the boader to NSW (the ACT is one small city plus a bit totally landlocked by NSW) at night, I immidiately break the law because 'P' platers can't drive at night there.

Did that curfuw law pass did it?

Did that curfuw law pass did it?

Actually, I'm not sure it has yet, but it wouldn't surprise me.

Here's one - Did you know: Australia is the smallest continent and the largest island in the world.

Actually, I'm not sure it has yet, but it wouldn't surprise me.

Here's one - Did you know: Australia is the smallest continent and the largest island in the world.
That isn't quite true...

It's the largest island (I think, not sure about Antarctica), but Australia isn't the continent. I thought it was called Oceania or Australasia these days. If this is the case, Australia can't be the smallest continent because it is only one country and you aren't including all of the polynesian islands, etc. Or New Zealand

That isn't quite true...

It's the largest island (I think, not sure about Antarctica), but Australia isn't the continent. I thought it was called Oceania or Australasia these days. If this is the case, Australia can't be the smallest continent because it is only one country and you aren't including all of the polynesian islands, etc. Or New Zealand

Australasia is the region (Oceania sometimes includes Australasia and the terms are sometimes used interchangeably) Australia is a continent. The rest are seperate islands. They may be on the same continental shelf, but then, so is North America on the same shelf as South America.

Australasia is the region (Oceania sometimes includes Australasia and the terms are sometimes used interchangeably) Australia is a continent. The rest are seperate islands. They may be on the same continental shelf, but then, so is North America on the same shelf as South America.
They have to be part of a continent, and it isn't Asia.

The Grand Canyon is 44,000 cubic meters in volume. That would take over 2.1 million jellybeans to fill up.


Eh? If we take the cubic root, it gives 35 m. That is, the Canyon should have the same volume as a cube of 35 x 35 x 35 m. How can it be so small?

Eh? If we take the cubic root, it gives 35 m. That is, the Canyon should have the same volume as a cube of 35 x 35 x 35 m. How can it be so small?
I'm pretty sure you are right, hold on...

yup, it's 40bn cubic metres. That's about 35000^3 m

in a Texas bar, you arent allowed to drink more than 3 pints when sitting down - you have to stand before you drink the fourth.

in Idaho, you are not allowed to keep ice cream in your pockets. :D

In Taiwan, chewing gum is illegal.

In England, every guy over the ageof 14 must practice crossbow for 5 hrs a week, in presence of a preist. (of course this law isnt enforced anymore, its just never been repelled)

Isn't there one in one of the Mid-West States that says you can't own China Replica's of people or animals?

In Baltimore City - you may not curse within the city limits

In New York - Women may go topless in public, providing it is not for business purposes. BUT It is illegal for a woman to be on the street wearing "body hugging clothing."

In Alaska - It's legal to shoot bears, but illegal to wake one up with the expressed purpose of taking a picture

Where I live, If you find a stray animal and show it to a shop owner, he has to pay you 10-25 cents.

Also, It's illegal to drive stright into your driveway. You have to back into it. But this isn't enforced.

Every year more than 2500 left handed people are killed from using right handed products.


Post your own funny or made up or useless etc "facts"

So true. I'd still have my arms if John Deere made a left handed combine. But alas that is water under the dam.

I'm pretty sure you are right, hold on...

yup, it's 40bn cubic metres. That's about 35000^3 m
Which implies some 2.5 x 10^16 jelly beans would be required to fill it. (Depending on brand, of course.)

...

In England, every guy over the ageof 14 must practice crossbow for 5 hrs a week, in presence of a preist. (of course this law isnt enforced anymore, its just never been repelled)
Since when did honest Englishmen use crossbows? I think you may be confusing such nasty foreign contraptions with the honest longbow. (Not to mention falling for an old chestnut, of course.)

Oh, and Seals only sleep a minute and a half at a time.

That isn't quite true...

It's the largest island (I think, not sure about Antarctica), but Australia isn't the continent. I thought it was called Oceania or Australasia these days. If this is the case, Australia can't be the smallest continent because it is only one country and you aren't including all of the polynesian islands, etc. Or New Zealand
Australia is a continent.
While on about continnents, here's a pointless fact - all continents begin and end with the same letter. (EuropE, AfricA, AmericA, AsiA, AustraliA, AntarticA)

Often people complain about the US educational system by quoting the statistic that 60% of Americans can't find Europe on the map. So what. We never get credit for the 75% who can.

I'm pretty sure you are right, hold on...

yup, it's 40bn cubic metres. That's about 35000^3 m

Well, at least we now know that if we build a screen across the grand canyon out of jellybeans, one bean thick, we would need 2.1 million.

In Ohio...

It is illegal to mistreat anything of great importance.

It is illegal to fish for whales on Sunday.

Women are prohibited from wearing patent leather shoes in public.

It is illegal to get a fish drunk

Well, at least we now know that if we build a screen across the grand canyon out of jellybeans, one bean thick, we would need 2.1 million.
I still can't get the numbers to add up. Is the screen laid across the top of the grand canyon or across the width of it? What is the orientation of the beans with respect to the screen?

If you get on a Sydney ferry with an infectious disease, you can get fined. Ditto if you take someone's seat without permission or forget to flush the toilet.

Eskimos use refrigators to stop food from freezing.


Lol

oh yeah? well, like 90,000,000,000,000 people die every second from reading stuid posts like this one in just the seven major US cities alone

there is an outdated law in Las Angeles that says tieing alligators to light posts is illegal

Every year more than 2500 left handed people are killed from using right handed products.


98% of them deserved it. (the nerve of them)

Broccoli has twice as much Vitamin C as an orange.

Broccoli has twice as much Vitamin C as an orange.
Which in turn have 87% more Vitamin C than the letter C.

Church Announcements

These announcements actually appeared in a church bulletin or were announced verbally in a church service:

Miss Bertha Belch, a missionary from Africa will be speaking tonight at Calvary Memorial Church in Racine. Come tonight and hear Bertha Belch all the way from Africa.

Our youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8PM in the recreation hall. Come out and watch us kill Christ the King.

Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Don't forget your husbands.

The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict.

The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water"; the sermon tonight: "Searching for Jesus."

Barbara remains in the hospital and needs blood donors for more transfusions. She is also having trouble sleeping and requests tapes of Pastor Jack's sermons.

Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community.

Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say "hell" to someone who doesn't care much about you.

Don't let worry kill you off -- let the Church help.

A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.

At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice.

The senior choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir.

Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other item to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

Potluck Supper Sunday at 5PM -- prayer and medication to follow.

The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.

Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B.S. is done.

Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7PM. Please use the back door.

The eighth graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the Church basement Friday at 7PM. The Congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.

Weight Watchers will meet at 7PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.

The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge -- Now Up Yours."

Our next song is "Angels We Have Heard Get High."

Announcement in the church bulletin for National Prayer and Fasting conference: "The cost for attending the Fasting and Prayer Conference includes meals."
(http://mistupid.com/people/page037.htm)

<snip>

Oh. My. Gourd. That is the most freakin' hilarious thing I have read in a looong time.

Four thirds of people don't know their fractions.

Useless fact... The actual name for random, useless, etc.. information is menutia (sp?)

Four thirds of people don't know their fractions.

Useless fact... The actual name for random, useless, etc.. information is menutia (sp?)

What is this '(sp?)' that you talk of?

What is this '(sp?)' that you talk of?
It means he/she/it is not sure if the preceding word is correctly spelled.

I now have less hair than before I started talking with Armandian Cheese in that other thread over there.

It is legal is the US to eat Kiwi (The bird, not the fruit) but is illegal in New Zealand.

It is legal is the US to eat Kiwi (The bird, not the fruit) but is illegal in New Zealand.

That's probably for the same reason that it's illegal to eat the bald eagle in the US but not in New Zealand.

That's probably for the same reason that it's illegal to eat the bald eagle in the US but not in New Zealand.

SO all we would have to do is find a place where humans aren't indigenous...*rubs chin thoughtfully*

That's probably for the same reason that it's illegal to eat the bald eagle in the US but not in New Zealand.

Sounds reasonable to me. Although, we in Australia eat kangaroo all the time. Mmmm... Kangaroo.

I tried it once, I didn't like it much.

The A.C.T. - Australian Capitol Territory - is a territory in Australia, look at the middle right of the country. We are responsible for holding parliment, the ANU (rated 16th uni in the world recently I think), Prime Minister Gough Whitlam - well, he was from NSW, but he went to my school. (Yay!) and yet another Labor seat. These are true facts that I learnt in HS, but may not be correct anymore. (Depite the fact that I'm still there.)

In the ACT, pushbikes have right of way on roads (the law was recently changed along with pretty green lanes for these 'rare creatures' - I quote the ad)

In the ACT, it is impossable to own land, therefore the government can push you off if they find oil or gold deposits. The leasehold is valid for 99 years, after which the property is no longer yours.

The ACT is the only place in Australia where it is legal to own cannabis, two plants per person, and what you do with it in your home is up to you. However, it is illegal to purchase the plant anywhere. It is also the only place in Australia, I believe, where one can legally purchase 'X' rated videos or walk into a brothel.

Finally, in civic, the centre of the city, the local drug dealer use to sit on a bench right outside the police dept. Untill they moved the police dept. across the square, at which point he moved to an appropriate bench outside the new police dept.

Ahhh... The ACT.
Sounds like a hell hole for right wingers like me. Although I doubt it is illegal to purchase X-Rated video in Australia, if you're over 18. Don't y'all have freedom of speech clauses and such?

It means he/she/it is not sure if the preceding word is correctly spelled.

Ahhh. Thankyou. You learn something new every day.

It is also the only place in Australia, I believe, where one can legally purchase 'X' rated videos or walk into a brothel.

In Queensland brothels are also legal.

Humming birds do not sleep, they hibernate each night. If you picked one up while it was hibernating it couldn't summon the energy to fly away for a minute or two. Paraphrased from David Attenborough's "Life of Birds."

Flamingos get their pink collour from the crustations they eat. (As above)

60% of the chemical reactions that go on in you also happen in a banana and our DNA is less complex than most grasses. Paraphrased from Bill Bryson's "A Short History of Nearly Everything."

If you drew a map of the solar system to scale with the sun represented by the period (full stop) at the end of this sentence Pluto would be the size of an electron and would be 30Km (18Miles approximatly I guess) away. As above.

David Attenborough's brother is the bearded scientist in "Jurassic Park."

Sounds like a hell hole for right wingers like me. Although I doubt it is illegal to purchase X-Rated video in Australia, if you're over 18. Don't y'all have freedom of speech clauses and such?

Sounds like Cincinnatti. :p

Sounds like a hell hole for right wingers like me. Although I doubt it is illegal to purchase X-Rated video in Australia, if you're over 18. Don't y'all have freedom of speech clauses and such?

No, that would require a bill of rights I guess. It IS illegal to SELL X-Rated media in Queensland, but it is not illegal to purchase or to own.

Sounds like a hell hole for right wingers like me. Although I doubt it is illegal to purchase X-Rated video in Australia, if you're over 18. Don't y'all have freedom of speech clauses and such?

Actually, I'm pretty sure it's illegal everywhere else. Perhaps someone can enlighten us. Unless I'm mistaken, everything I said was true. Police also pull people over to test them for alcohol etc. on monday mornings. In fact, they don't want to catch anyone - too much paperwork. :D

Ahhh. Thankyou. You learn something new every day.

However if you wanted to be formal you would use (sic), which was latin for something that I don't remember.

Example: "I have poor speeling (sic)."

No, that would require a bill of rights I guess. It IS illegal to SELL X-Rated media in Queensland, but it is not illegal to purchase or to own.

See! See! I told you!
Much like the predicament with the cannabis in the ACT. Still, I suppose the needy could visit the ACT and stock up then. :D (Not that I'm an advocate of porn in any way shape or form - truly I don't look at porn).

However if you wanted to be formal you would use (sic), which was latin for something that I don't remember.

Example: "I have poor speeling (sic)."

Really, I thought it meant 'as written' for mispelt quotes. E.g: "No coment (sic)" To show that it's not your mistake, your just copying the quote correctly.

See! See! I told you!
Much like the predicament with the cannabis in the ACT. Still, I suppose the needy could visit the ACT and stock up then. :D (Not that I'm an advocate of porn in any way shape or form - truly I don't look at porn).

You can legally order porn from the ACt via mail order.

As for cannabis, I thought South Australia was de-criminalised, and legalised only for medical reasons...

Really, I thought it meant 'as written' for mispelt quotes. E.g: "No coment (sic)" To show that it's not your mistake, your just copying the quote correctly.

Yeah, that's the most pure use.

You can legally order porn from the ACt via mail order.

As for cannabis, I thought South Australia was de-criminalised, and legalised only for medical reasons...

Really, how did you find that out, I wonder. :p

It's good to see, SA has been making some good advances. (Then, it was settled by free settlers as opposed to convicts. :D )

That blonde joke about fish not being able to drown.. lies!!!

U can drown a fish by pulling it backwards
its gills fill up with water

True Facts (tm) from Japan:
Japan had no laws against child pornography and had no legal age of sexual consent until the mid-90's.
Japan has one of the largest militaries in Asia, despite the provisions under the constitution that outlaw haveing a military.
Japan executes prisoners by hanging. Prisoners not informed of the execution date. And their families are not informed until after the fact.
Most Japanese MDs keep their medical records in German.


"True" Facts (tm) from Japan (all ridiculous things that I have been told):
Sleeping with an air conditioner on can cause diarrhea.
Sleeping with an air conditioner on can cause fatal illnesses.
Japanese snow is wetter than snow in other countries.
Japanese people cannot eat red meat.



SO all we would have to do is find a place where humans aren't indigenous...*rubs chin thoughtfully*

:::moves away from LG on the "group W" bench:::

Really, I thought it meant 'as written' for mispelt quotes. E.g: "No coment (sic)" To show that it's not your mistake, your just copying the quote correctly.

Yes, that is correct.

http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=sic
sic1 adv.
Thus; so. Used to indicate that a quoted passage, especially one containing an error or unconventional spelling, has been retained in its original form or written intentionally.

"Sp?" is a common proofreading mark used to indicate misspellings.
http://webster.commnet.edu/writing/symbols.htm

True Facts (tm) from Japan:
Japan had no laws against child pornography and had no legal age of sexual consent until the mid-90's.
Japan has one of the largest militaries in Asia, despite the provisions under the constitution that outlaw haveing a military.
Japan executes prisoners by hanging. Prisoners not informed of the execution date. And their families are not informed until after the fact.
Most Japanese MDs keep their medical records in German.


"True" Facts (tm) from Japan (all ridiculous things that I have been told):
Sleeping with an air conditioner on can cause diarrhea.
Sleeping with an air conditioner on can cause fatal illnesses.
Japanese snow is wetter than snow in other countries.
Japanese people cannot eat red meat.





:::moves away from LG on the "group W" bench:::



Yes, that is correct.

http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=sic


"Sp?" is a common proofreading mark used to indicate misspellings.
http://webster.commnet.edu/writing/symbols.htm

Lol Arlow Guthry (sp?) "You can get anything you want at Alices restaurant, do, do, do..." :D

Lol Arlow Guthry (sp?) "You can get anything you want at Alices restaurant, do, do, do..." :D

That's the one. (Spelled Arlo Guthrie, BTW). It's a true story, if you didn't know: http://www.fortunecity.com/tinpan/parton/2/alice.html

"But that's not what I'm here to tell you about.
I'm here to talk about the draft."

:p

That's the one. (Spelled Arlo Guthrie, BTW). It's a true story, if you didn't know: http://www.fortunecity.com/tinpan/parton/2/alice.html

"But that's not what I'm here to tell you about.
I'm here to talk about the draft."

:p

I suspected as much. Very funny. I take it the one about the pickle isn't. :D

I suspected as much. Very funny. I take it the one about the pickle isn't. :D

Not as far as I know. :)

"And it was at that very moment, as the pickle was being jammed down my *** that I came to the realization that... I... I didn't want a pickle." :D

"And it was at that very moment, as the pickle was being jammed down my *** that I came to the realization that... I... I didn't want a pickle." :D
Did you know that 96.452% of all threads on any forum go from serious debate to rambling anarchy and disgustingness in an average of 6 pages. :D

Did you know that 96.452% of all threads on any forum go from serious debate to rambling anarchy and disgustingness in an average of 6 pages. :D

I guess this one is of the 3.558% that dont. :D

"luckily, I didn't run into the mountain... I drove of the cliff."