NationStates Jolt Archive

Hear ye hear ye, one and all! Now, you may think that this is just some sort of prank or whatnot, but I assure you it is not. Here is the truth, plain and simple: I am better than all of you. What's that you say? I am nothing but a lying communist freak? Ah, but that is where you are wrong. I am the best living human on Earth.

Why is that you say? Well, I have come up with a list for this very purpose:

List of reasons why The Lightning Star is the best
1. Because his name ownz
2. Because his REAL name ownz.
3. Because he's related to Jan III Sobieski, the savior of Western Civilization(Mr. Sobieski's mother has the same last-name. And Danilowicz isn't a common Polish name.)
4. Because he has an IQ of like... big number!
5. Because he says so.
6. Because he's been to more countries in the last 13 years than most of you have ever gone in your lives.
7. Because he is immensly popular.
8. Because he has conquered the world in Rise of Nations. 26 times.
9. Because he knows good music.
10. Because he speaks 2 languages (three if you count leet speak)
11. Because he has read The Lord of the Rings series, The Silmarillion, The Book of Unfinished Tales, the Book of Lost Tales I, the Book of Lost Tales II, every book in the Ender's Game and Ender's Shadow series, all but 3 books in the Redwall series, and alot of other book for people more than 2x his age.
12. Because he has a larger vocabulary than 70% of the people on these forums.
13. Because he can tell you the name of prominent Panamanian Politicians.
14. Because he can speak Panamanian Slang.
15. Because he's a rich, imperialistic gringo.
16. Because he plays Final Fantasy XI: Online and he ownz.
17. Because he can name every country in the world, and at least 90% of the worlds capitals.
18. Because when he grows up he's gonna be an ambassador and then a senator and then President of the United States.
19. Because when he's president he'll finally finish what Ethan Allen couldn't : Conquer Canada.
20. Because he likes pie.
21. Because he's better than Colodia.
22. He isn't named after a sucky day of the week.
23. He's very modest.
24. He is very charismatic.
25. He is a good politician.
26. He can whip a simple group of people into a frenzy with his voice and his vocabulary.
...

And the list goes on and on.

List of reasons why you should get over it:
1. It will make youe life easier to get used to.
2. It will make sure that when he becomes Empero--President of the United State's he will make your life a world of pain.
3. Because if you don't he shall smite you when he takes over heaven.
4. Because if you don't he'll bomb your house with Napalm when he becomes President of the United States.
5. Because the pie tells you so.

You know who I'm better than? Colodia.

Damn commies, spreadin' their lies again. Go back to England!

You know who I'm better than? Colodia.

So am I.

You know who I'm better than? Colodia.

Who isn't?

Damn commies, spreadin' their lies again. Go back to England!

As stated before, I am not communist, I am not lying, and I'm not English (Irish, but not English).

Now go back to your Canadian Steak House!

Who isn't?

Colodia.

I'm suppose to believe you're better than me because you say so?

lol.

I don't think so.

:p

As stated before, I am not communist, I am not lying, and I'm not English (Irish, but not English).

Now go back to your Canadian Steak House!

Listen pinko, I'm not going to read your red propaganda to learn about your silly, non-capitalist life story.

And you're just jealous of our steak! I bet they only feed you wheat on your commune.

I'm suppose to believe you're better than me because you say so?

lol.

I don't think so.

:p

Oh ho ho!

What's this? A person named after the second suckiest day of the week things that they are better than me?

*scoffs*

Listen pinko, I'm not going to read your red propaganda to learn about your silly, non-capitalist life story.

And you're just jealous of our steak! I bet they only feed you wheat on your commune.

Ok, you canuck freako, I tire of this. I send you an angry Irishman to eat your arm's.

Oh, and I'm not from Ireland. I'm just part Irish.

But movies don't start until I arrive, and start when I arrive and I always get a good seat no matter what the movie or the showing.

And weather almost always performs to my advantage. Even so much so that when I travel the weather where I go is just like the weather from where I've been until I've adjusted.

Certainly this puts me on par, since the whim and the whimsy of the world works for my benifit?

Ha! I'm the best! The voices told me so. . .

But movies don't start until I arrive, and start when I arrive and I always get a good seat no matter what the movie or the showing.

And weather almost always performs to my advantage. Even so much so that when I travel the weather where I go is just like the weather from where I've been until I've adjusted.

Certainly this puts me on par, since the whim and the whimsy of the world works for my benifit?

Ah, Tuche. But...

My voice can whip the average, unmotivated Joe into a frenzy. I can harness the power of the Human Spirit to overcome seemingly impossible odds. In less than 2 minutes, a can change the sway of an election with a single speech.

This puts me ahead, seeing how the Human Spirit seems to back me no matter what.

My gun says im better than you. Now im not much of a fighting man but hes been drinking all day and he has a wee bit of a temper.

I am a rock. . .

Ah, Tuche. But...

My voice can whip the average, unmotivated Joe into a frenzy. I can harness the power of the Human Spirit to overcome seemingly impossible odds. In less than 2 minutes, a can change the sway of an election with a single speech.

This puts me ahead, seeing how the Human Spirit seems to back me no matter what.
But-
I can lead people down illogical and illconcieved paths, even if I've done it to them before. People who otherwise are rational and reliable people will follow me no matter how stupid or ill planned my idea is. And inspire followings in people I've only met tangetially.

And cats, who are notoriously standoffish and self absorbed, love me.

But-
I can lead people down illogical and illconcieved paths, even if I've done it to them before. People who otherwise are rational and reliable people will follow me no matter how stupid or ill planned my idea is. And inspire followings in people I've only met tangetially.

And cats, who are notoriously standoffish and self absorbed, love me.

Hmmm...

HOWEVER- I can pit 60 Carthaginian Infantry agains 2300 British Warbands in Rome: Total War. And Win.. I can also create the perfect city in Sim City 4, as well as storm a nazi fortress singlehandedly in Medal of Honor: Allied Assault: Breakthrough.

But-
I can lead people down illogical and illconcieved paths, even if I've done it to them before. People who otherwise are rational and reliable people will follow me no matter how stupid or ill planned my idea is. And inspire followings in people I've only met tangetially.

And cats, who are notoriously standoffish and self absorbed, love me.

. . . coughs up a hair ball.

What's this? A person named after the second suckiest day of the week things that they are better than me?

A person named after the hardest day in her week as a journalist rushing to deadline. At least my name accomplishes something.

. . . coughs up a hair ball.

... And the award for the most mentally messed up person goes too...

Annotationia!

... And the award for the most mentally messed up person goes too...

Annotationia!

Aw Shucks! Thank you. . . You shouldn't have!
:gundge:

A person named after the hardest day in her week as a journalist rushing to deadline. At least my name accomplishes something.

Think about this. The Sun is a star. Without the Sun, life on Earth would cease to exist. Why? Because without the Sun there is no light. No light, no plants. No plants, no oxygen. No Oxygen, no ozone. No ozone, no water. No water, no life. Will life go on without Tuesday? Yes.

Also, Lightning is a HUGE jolt of power. If you are hit by lightning, more likely than not you will fry. Will you fry if you are at the height of your work-week? Not unless you have a medical disorder or you commit suicide or someone kills you. Which isn't very often.

Now think of this: I have combined Pure power with the giver of life to us all, and thus have come up with the perfect name for my powerful nation.

[Quote removed by Cogitation.]

Wow, such charisma! Bravo, bravo!

I bow before your might intelect and power with words!

Hmmm...

HOWEVER- I can pit 60 Carthaginian Infantry agains 2300 British Warbands in Rome: Total War. And Win.. I can also create the perfect city in Sim City 4, as well as storm a nazi fortress singlehandedly in Medal of Honor: Allied Assault: Breakthrough.
Interesting....

I have defended whoeverthehellitwas I was supposed to be defending in Aero Fighters 2 with Steve and the Ninja and have seen the homerotic ending (I'm not kidding. It's worth the quarter drain to see it, you have to go through twice, but oh man) and have won the Anglo-American Cup in GT1 with the Aston Martin (I assure you that's a feat). I can play Ms. Pac Man with zenlike intensity. My Grand Theft Auto riots have been described as the 'Stuff of Legend.'

I once defended the honor of old school arcade etiquette by wiping five dollars in quarters from a kid on Samurai Showdown.

Like a living dowsers wand, I can discover the location of a burrito bar with pinpoint accuracy.

People I have never met remember me.

Wow, such charisma! Bravo, bravo!

I bow before your might intelect and power with words!
Yes, i is good at words!

Of course, all was said in jest.
I have to respect anyone who says "whatnot". I love the word.
And most people who brag about superior vocabularies often do. I'm not sure why that is...

Oh, fuckfacery is quite a rampant mental condition in todays society.
It is especially prevelant in those in political positions, and people who have an internet connection.

Interesting....

I have defended whoeverthehellitwas I was supposed to be defending in Aero Fighters 2 with Steve and the Ninja and have seen the homerotic ending (I'm not kidding. It's worth the quarter drain to see it, you have to go through twice, but oh man) and have won the Anglo-American Cup in GT1 with the Aston Martin (I assure you that's a feat). I can play Ms. Pac Man with zenlike intensity. My Grand Theft Auto riots have been described as the 'Stuff of Legend.'

I once defended the honor of old school arcade etiquette by wiping five dollars in quarters from a kid on Samurai Showdown.

Like a living dowsers wand, I can discover the location of a burrito bar with pinpoint accuracy.

People I have never met remember me.

Hmmmm....

I have enslaved other gods with my great people in Black & White. I have beaten Sonic Adventure DX and Sonic Adventure 2: Battle. I have beaten Paper Mario, Final Fantasy VII, VIII, and IX. If you look up my real name on google. You will find at least 6 matches. To my father.

But movies don't start until I arrive, and start when I arrive and I always get a good seat no matter what the movie or the showing.


So work in a cinema?

Hmmmm....

I have enslaved other gods with my great people in Black & White. I have beaten Sonic Adventure DX and Sonic Adventure 2: Battle. I have beaten Paper Mario, Final Fantasy VII, VIII, and IX. If you look up my real name on google. You will find at least 6 matches. To my father.
AHA! But if you look up my name in google you will get three matches, two will actually be me and the third a horseshoe champion in Kansas, whom I have not met.

Hmmmm....

I have enslaved other gods with my great people in Black & White. I have beaten Sonic Adventure DX and Sonic Adventure 2: Battle. I have beaten Paper Mario, Final Fantasy VII, VIII, and IX. If you look up my real name on google. You will find at least 6 matches. To my father.
I play a mean game of pen-clicking!
Beat THAT!

AHA! But if you look up my name in google you will get three matches, two will actually be me and the third a horseshoe champion in Kansas, whom I have not met.

AHA! But if you look up my name all of the searches will come from the United States Department of State.. That's right, I'm in a government Family. So I have the power to call the FBI on you.

Not to mention, I have until January 17th off. That's right, I get to do WHATEVER I want within reason until Jan 17th.

I play a mean game of pen-clicking!
Beat THAT!

I am the king at twiddling my thumbs.

I am the king at twiddling my thumbs.
SO YOU STOLE MY CROWN!

I am. . . I am. . . I am. . . Shit! I forget. . . Luke! I am your father?

I am awesome, to prove so, see this awesome telegram I recently recieved:

prostrip
Received: 2 days ago hey, murderation. How are you? Take a look at the watch I bought for someone:
www.iwalton.com
What do you think?

I THINK THEY'RE GREAT!

I should be King Of Everything.
As a matter of fact, I should be crowned King Of Everything right now.
But the fact is that it isn’t so.
Many of you will be asking “Why?”
Because the world is stupid, wont let me be a King Of Everything, something to do with democracy…
Oh, why should I be King Of Everything?
Why didn’t you just say that?!?

Well, here’s why.
And yes, I do realise almost everything I write is a list… shut up.

1. I am me.
2. I’m great.
3. I know everything. If I’m wrong about something, chances are that the thing is wrong in its place in the universe. Scum of a thing.
4. I have direction. I have purpose. I wont let little things like “human rights” or “human lives” or “the Geneva Convention” stand in my way of getting this world right.
5. I am the only person who really appreciates the idea of such power.
6. I’m great.
7. I know what is best for the world. Sure, some children might die or go blind or be maimed in the construction of my temp… er opulently appointed pala… er house and parliament thingy, but who cares? Damn kids, it’ll be good for them to learn the true meaning of hard work. And it would help toward the whole over population thing…

Need I say more?
Of course, yes, it’s never enough for you bastards, is it?
In being King Of Everything, I don’t mean anything in a sacrilegious way. God is the last person I want to write my name on his enemy list…. Who wants to mess with omnipotence? An idiot, that’s who.
Moving along, I would just want to be a King Of Everything in the regard of this puny little planet and its inhabitants. Ruling the world in a fair, humane and democratic order would be good… but it wouldn’t last forever, because undoubtedly some people would view my views as biased toward something or other somehow.
How to avoid this: become supreme ruler of the Earth, and despise and crush everyone under my might equally.
Christians: Have a church. Just don’t sing crummy old songs near my house. Oh, and I will tax an oppress you.
Muslims: Have a whatever you have thingy. Just don’t blow me up. I will tax an oppress you.
Jews: Have your Synagogue. Just don’t use Yiddish around me. It’s creepy, and I’ll know you’re mocking me. I will tax an oppress you.
Atheists: Have whatever. Your AA meetings for all I care, just don’t give me that high and mighty skeptic thing, because I am better than you, and it is irritating. I will tax an oppress you.
Agnostics: Be confused. Just shut the hell up. I will tax an oppress you.
Whatever else: Do stuff. Don’t do things that annoy me. I will tax an oppress you.

See? I am impartial in my oppression and unfair taking.
So, cast your votes, tell me you think I should be King Of Everything. And if you do something for me, or you can provide service, or you amuse me, just maybe I will favour you…
Just kidding, I will tax and oppress you.

. . . oops! That's not me. . .

I am a rock

Snip.

lol. I've been here longer than you, therefore, I win this TLS v. TH battle. ;)

Lightning Star, aren't you from Central Massachusetts? I think that gives you like a billion cool points or something.

Lightning Star, aren't you from Central Massachusetts? I think that gives you like a billion cool points or something.

Or not.

I should be King Of Everything.
As a matter of fact, I should be crowned King Of Everything right now.
But the fact is that it isn’t so.
Many of you will be asking “Why?”
Because the world is stupid, wont let me be a King Of Everything, something to do with democracy…
Oh, why should I be King Of Everything?
Why didn’t you just say that?!?

Well, here’s why.
And yes, I do realise almost everything I write is a list… shut up.

1. I am me.
2. I’m great.
3. I know everything. If I’m wrong about something, chances are that the thing is wrong in its place in the universe. Scum of a thing.
4. I have direction. I have purpose. I wont let little things like “human rights” or “human lives” or “the Geneva Convention” stand in my way of getting this world right.
5. I am the only person who really appreciates the idea of such power.
6. I’m great.
7. I know what is best for the world. Sure, some children might die or go blind or be maimed in the construction of my temp… er opulently appointed pala… er house and parliament thingy, but who cares? Damn kids, it’ll be good for them to learn the true meaning of hard work. And it would help toward the whole over population thing…

Need I say more?
Of course, yes, it’s never enough for you bastards, is it?
In being King Of Everything, I don’t mean anything in a sacrilegious way. God is the last person I want to write my name on his enemy list…. Who wants to mess with omnipotence? An idiot, that’s who.
Moving along, I would just want to be a King Of Everything in the regard of this puny little planet and its inhabitants. Ruling the world in a fair, humane and democratic order would be good… but it wouldn’t last forever, because undoubtedly some people would view my views as biased toward something or other somehow.
How to avoid this: become supreme ruler of the Earth, and despise and crush everyone under my might equally.
Christians: Have a church. Just don’t sing crummy old songs near my house. Oh, and I will tax an oppress you.
Muslims: Have a whatever you have thingy. Just don’t blow me up. I will tax an oppress you.
Jews: Have your Synagogue. Just don’t use Yiddish around me. It’s creepy, and I’ll know you’re mocking me. I will tax an oppress you.
Atheists: Have whatever. Your AA meetings for all I care, just don’t give me that high and mighty skeptic thing, because I am better than you, and it is irritating. I will tax an oppress you.
Agnostics: Be confused. Just shut the hell up. I will tax an oppress you.
Whatever else: Do stuff. Don’t do things that annoy me. I will tax an oppress you.

See? I am impartial in my oppression and unfair taking.
So, cast your votes, tell me you think I should be King Of Everything. And if you do something for me, or you can provide service, or you amuse me, just maybe I will favour you…
Just kidding, I will tax and oppress you.



This seems somehow familiar....

AHA! But if you look up my name all of the searches will come from the United States Department of State.. That's right, I'm in a government Family. So I have the power to call the FBI on you.

Not to mention, I have until January 17th off. That's right, I get to do WHATEVER I want within reason until Jan 17th.
You'll excuse me as I had to move to my 'secure location' as I am most assuredly considered a potential threat by the FBI (or so I believe) which is why I 'have no name'...and certainly if I am a threat there is the potentiality of greaterness.

List of reasons why The Lightning Star is the best
23. He's very modest.
.
I am better, but I'm not going to say why ;)

Lightning Star, aren't you from Central Massachusetts? I think that gives you like a billion cool points or something.

Naaw, it's not a billion.

He gets a jillion cool points for it.
It says so in the Unwritten Code!

I am. . . I am. . . I am. . . Shit! I forget. . . Luke! I am your father?

My brain itches now.

This seems somehow familiar....


:D

My brain itches now.

It only hurts for a little while. . . You'll get used to it.

Annotationia, who are you and why are you reading my crappy website??

Annotationia, who are you and why are you reading my crappy website??

I am who I am. . . and because it is there.

crappy maybe, but interesting to see the meanderings of a mind none the less.

Only a fool sees himself as better than others. We are all equal.

I happen to be more equal.

I happen to be more equal.

I am unequal, therefore I am better.

I am unequal, therefore I am better.
I am more equally unequal, increasing my equality to and unequal level and thus elevating me to a position of unequalled equalness.

I am unequal, therefore I am better.

We are all human, therefore we are all equal. No wealth or power can make you better than anyone else. You are still human.

Unless of course you put your brain in a robot, but lets not go into that...

We are all human, therefore we are all equal. No wealth or power can make you better than anyone else. You are still human.

Unless of course you put your brain in a robot, but lets not go into that...
I belong to my own species "homo davidus" (my name is david, explaining the davidus bit)!
SO I may rightfully claim that I am superior to humans! ie all of you!
As for the robot thing, the procedure is more complicated than you would think!

We are all human, therefore we are all equal. No wealth or power can make you better than anyone else. You are still human.

Unless of course you put your brain in a robot, but lets not go into that...

Psssssssssssst!. . . She thinks we are all human?

I belong to my own species "homo davidus" (my name is david, explaining the davidus bit)!
SO I may rightfully claim that I am superior to humans! ie all of you!
As for the robot thing, the procedure is more complicated than you would think!

Damn you! Now I have to update the census of animal species!

*Scribbles on paper*

Psssssssssssst!. . . She thinks we are all human?

She? I'm a HE!

"Uber Spamgirl"

She? I'm a HE!

of what species?

lol sorry 'bout that one

"Uber Spamgirl"

It aint my fault I have that title.

She? I'm a HE!

HA HA! :D

I'm still better than all of ye.

I am a nobody. Nobody is perfect. Therefore, I am perfect.

*yawns* Yet another member with megalomaniacal tendencies. So what else is new on this board?

- Asylum Nova

Murderation: I know this thred is a lark, but you might want to be a little more careful with your use of language. Not an official warning, just a suggestion.

Carry on.

--The Modified Democratic States of Cogitation
NationStates Game Moderator

Murderation: I know this thread is a lark, but you might want to be a little more careful with your use of language. Not an official warning, just a suggestion.

Carry on.

--The Modified Democratic States of Cogitation
NationStates Game Moderator

Um uh.... whatever you say boss!(even though this wasn't directed at me, It never hurts to be nice to a Mod. Because if you aren't, it DOES hurt.)