NationStates Jolt Archive

Hi, I have noticed a lot of threads about girl problems and well.. I am a girl. I am also a good listener so if you have a problem you would like to discuss, I am listening. Maybe I could help you out?

LoL .. i thought i might have gotten a bit more of a response but oh well :P Hmm if you don't wanna discuss your issues in the lurve department well then how about we talk about anything? well this thread was an experiment sorta but ... im thinking.. hm did the fact that i said i was a girl have anything to do with it?

I don't really think there are that many people who would like to go on an internet forum and ask strangers about their love life. The few who would, have already started their own threads so you shall have to hunt them down yourself.

do you think this is sincere?
I dont think i can really juggle a relationship now(with everything else),
but I really like you and find you attractive(obviously) but i dont think its
fair to you if all we are is friends with priveledges and I didnt discuss any of
this with you first. Long story short I feel like I've been in the wrong
here for not saying that point blank
if you need more info just ask

So how do u feel about this person? more info plz..

OH u r telling some1??

I'm only stuck with the whole "what kinda topic to use to strike up a conversation" part. I like good first-impressions.

I am very sorry love victims.. I have to go but post your problems if you want and i will respond next time i come on.. Happy posting..

I am very sorry love victims.. I have to go but post your problems if you want and i will respond next time i come on.. Happy posting..
so much drama and bumps leading up to this moment? I like that.

I would suggest asking questions.. ones that wont end with yes or no.. also avoid personal questions like... religion and politics if you are not ready to here different veiws.. um make sure you listen more rather than talk a lot..

Hmm i still have like 15mins online so is there anything else you would like to talk about?

She is very busy and sort of has problems with some of her family. I mean she's a Junior and is taking classes at a local college, When I see her she seems to want the relationship more than I do, but only when we are alone, so I think it might also be a bit more that we sort have the same best friend. Anyway she rides horses, as well as having AP classes. I will admit that she isn't terribly good looking, but I want her more for her personality than her looks.

lol, gIRL pROBLEMS!

Hmm i still have like 15mins online so is there anything else you would like to talk about?
Relax. This is a forum, not IRC. ;) Instant communication is not expected, so it's generally understood that you might not respond to a post right away.

...and contrary to some beliefs, we are not evil, corrupt Mods who shoot down perfectly legitimate threads that have been up longer than 15 minutes. :p

--The Jovial States of Cogitation
"Laugh about it for a moment."
NationStates Self-Proclaimed Court Jester

Relax. This is a forum, not IRC. ;) Instant communication is not expected, so it's generally understood that you might not respond to a post right away.

...and contrary to some beliefs, we are not evil, corrupt Mods who shoot down perfectly legitimate threads that have been up longer than 15 minutes. :p

--The Jovial States of Cogitation
"Laugh about it for a moment."
NationStates Self-Proclaimed Court Jester

Whoa.
I can't believe I didn't know you were a mod.
And it even says under your name!
Huh.

I'm a journalist for a youth activism magazine, and when I went to interview the guys from Sudan, I was so entranced by the youngest one, Robert Nataba with his wise eyes and broken heart and beautiful smile and I had to be careful not to look at him to much because, I kept reminding myself, I was here as a journalist.
But wow was he profound and so incredibly sweet and shy and smart and just amazing.
And he called me today! He called me and just chatted for a few minutes and asked how my christmas was and what I was up to and said in his broken english, "maybe you need to interview me again. or maybe sometime I have questions for you, so we should see each other" and I could hear him smiling on the other side of the phone when I said that was a good idea and I can't beleive I'm typing all this but he's just so...wow. I'd been thinking about him all the time since I spent only two hours with him, and he called!

But he's nineteen, four years older than me. When I said I was a freshman in highschool he laughed and said, "call me when you graduate", and he's so clearly wondering what to do in a foreign country, and he's worried about being considerate because I'm young, and I'm wondering what you guys think about the age difference in this case.

She is very busy and sort of has problems with some of her family. I mean she's a Junior and is taking classes at a local college, When I see her she seems to want the relationship more than I do, but only when we are alone, so I think it might also be a bit more that we sort have the same best friend. Anyway she rides horses, as well as having AP classes. I will admit that she isn't terribly good looking, but I want her more for her personality than her looks.

She seems very close to you and I think that you should definetly be there to support her with her family. It would be ackward for your best friend too.. how does he/she feel about the situation? It sounds like you would rather be friends.. tell me this.. do you want to have a relationship with her because you are generally attracted to her personality or because she would like one?

LoL .. i thought i might have gotten a bit more of a response but oh well :P Hmm if you don't wanna discuss your issues in the lurve department well then how about we talk about anything? well this thread was an experiment sorta but ... im thinking.. hm did the fact that i said i was a girl have anything to do with it?

the hell is lurve.
sound like a pirate
are you too in pirate love?

the hell is lurve.
sound like a pirate
are you too in pirate love?

Roffle Mao says "THIS POST IS SILLY!"
:p

EDIT:
Can I be a pirate?
Please?

I'm a journalist for a youth activism magazine, and when I went to interview the guys from Sudan, I was so entranced by the youngest one, Robert Nataba with his wise eyes and broken heart and beautiful smile and I had to be careful not to look at him to much because, I kept reminding myself, I was here as a journalist.
But wow was he profound and so incredibly sweet and shy and smart and just amazing.
And he called me today! He called me and just chatted for a few minutes and asked how my christmas was and what I was up to and said in his broken english, "maybe you need to interview me again. or maybe sometime I have questions for you, so we should see each other" and I could hear him smiling on the other side of the phone when I said that was a good idea and I can't beleive I'm typing all this but he's just so...wow. I'd been thinking about him all the time since I spent only two hours with him, and he called!

But he's nineteen, four years older than me. When I said I was a freshman in highschool he laughed and said, "call me when you graduate", and he's so clearly wondering what to do in a foreign country, and he's worried about being considerate because I'm young, and I'm wondering what you guys think about the age difference in this case.

Well I think that age does not really matter and you should see him because he sounds sweet. The only thing is that if you care about what people around you will think. I don't think that there is anything wrong with seeing him because well he sounds sweet and you seem to connect nicely. My friend is really serious about older guys and she would tell you to carry a breath spray.. maybe you have to be careful?

the hell is lurve.
sound like a pirate
are you too in pirate love?

Just giving spice to what was a dead beat forum :p

She seems very close to you and I think that you should definetly be there to support her with her family. It would be ackward for your best friend too.. how does he/she feel about the situation? It sounds like you would rather be friends.. tell me this.. do you want to have a relationship with her because you are generally attracted to her personality or because she would like one?
When I first met her I never would have said I would go out with, but over time I came to like her for her personality, I mean enough to make it something more than just a friendship.

When I first met her I never would have said I would go out with, but over time I came to like her for her personality, I mean enough to make it something more than just a friendship.

It is so nice to hear that coming from a guy. So is the fact that she has a lot of things going on in her life stopping you from becoming serious with her? Well I think that you should become more than friends because u care for her and well she cares for you. Maybe she needs someone to support her with her family life and studies. I think you should start something :fluffle:

It is so nice to hear that coming from a guy. So is the fact that she has a lot of things going on in her life stopping you from becoming serious with her? Well I think that you should become more than friends because u care for her and well she cares for you. Maybe she needs someone to support her with her family life and studies. I think you should start something :fluffle:
We've done that :fluffle:, but yeah........

You sound kind of young, are you qualified to dispense advice? Although this guy (http://forums2.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=386400) didn't ask for advice, let's see what you're made of. Give some advice to this poor soul and we'll judge your competency.

You sound kind of young, are you qualified to dispense advice? Although this guy (http://forums2.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=386400) didn't ask for advice, let's see what you're made of. Give some advice to this poor soul and we'll judge your competency.

Lol well i didnt mean to give advice.. im just giving a view.. well i said at the begining that im a listener so i mainly want to listen. If you find anything i am saying offensive or immature plz let me know or tell me to stop talking.. I can only listen and tell you my opinion.

i'll read what he wrote .. hold on..

You want me to give advice on what he said? His essay was beautifully written and I seriously do not have any "advice" because i don't think it is necessary. I personally think that this woman might have been very close to him in a previous birth and their two souls must have had a great spiritual connection but that is all I have to say.

I guess if he can find this woman he should definitely contact her and talk to her. Tell her what an influence their dream has made on his life. maybe it made an influence on her life too. I think that he will feel complete if he talks to her. This forum was meant to be really light hearted so if you dont like what i say .. plz dont take me too seriously

I didn't mean to imply that I found anything wrong with your previous words of encouragement to others. But I don't know if I agree with your assesment of the link I posted. It seemed rather tragic to me. I guess I just really don't like unhappy endings.

It is so nice to hear that coming from a guy. So is the fact that she has a lot of things going on in her life stopping you from becoming serious with her? Well I think that you should become more than friends because u care for her and well she cares for you. Maybe she needs someone to support her with her family life and studies. I think you should start something :fluffle:

Don't listen to her!!! You will never be satisfied with the relationship if you are not physically attracted to the girl. The last time I checked platonic friendships between two people of the opposite sex are still allowed, and there doesn't seem to be the physical going.

But he's nineteen, four years older than me. When I said I was a freshman in highschool he laughed and said, "call me when you graduate", and he's so clearly wondering what to do in a foreign country, and he's worried about being considerate because I'm young, and I'm wondering what you guys think about the age difference in this case.

Well, age gaps usually do not make that much difference to mature relationships. However, you are way too young to be seeing someone whose had already started college. The maturity is not so much it, as the experiences you both have had, and he has had many more than you.

I know from my own life, the decisions I made at 15 and 16 were not that good, and had a tremendous on my life. Sometimes it is the simple ones that can have long lasting affects.

Just think hard about where you are both going and if your paths cross or run parallel.

It was sad but he is only experiencing what he was meant to in this birth.. well thats what i believe .. sorry if i am about to cause religious arguments..

back to love.. got a problem you would like to discuss anyone?

Don't listen to her!!! You will never be satisfied with the relationship if you are not physically attracted to the girl. The last time I checked platonic friendships between two people of the opposite sex are still allowed, and there doesn't seem to be the physical going.
There is, but I'm just saying that she isn't the best looking in most peoples eye's

Don't listen to her!!! You will never be satisfied with the relationship if you are not physically attracted to the girl. The last time I checked platonic friendships between two people of the opposite sex are still allowed, and there doesn't seem to be the physical going.

Sometimes when someones personality is so good they become physically attractive.. If you wanna start a relationship.. go 4 it..

Don't listen to her!!! You will never be satisfied with the relationship if you are not physically attracted to the girl. The last time I checked platonic friendships between two people of the opposite sex are still allowed, and there doesn't seem to be the physical going.

Physically attracted is not the same as good looking.

Duh!!!!

I know a lot of people that are good looking, but I do not find myself attracted to them sexually.

Physically attracted is not the same as good looking.

Duh!!!!

I know a lot of people that are good looking, but I do not find myself attracted to them sexually.

So true

He said he wanted a relationship with her so why not? looks aren't everything and she was attractive enough to fluffle with her..

There is, but I'm just saying that she isn't the best looking in most peoples eye's

Is the physical aspect there because you actually enjoy it, or because you don't want to disappoint her? Be honest.

And also the person that we both happen to be best friends with is a female, so that would be a platonic relationship, would it not. And not to mention I also have other platonic friends

Physically attracted is not the same as good looking.

Duh!!!!

I know a lot of people that are good looking, but I do not find myself attracted to them sexually.

It doesn't seem that he is too sold on either of the aspects.

Is it there because you actually enjoy it, or because you don't want to disappoint her? Be honest.
I enjoy being with her. So I choose the 1st option

does the bestfriend know of your love affair?

It doesn't seem that he is too sold on either of the aspects.
thats probably because I know that most people would think she's ugly with her light blue eye's and the mole on the side of her head

I enjoy being with her. So I choose the 1st option

You are avoiding the question, I think.

Do you really enjoy the :fluffle: ? That's the real question. I enjoy being with my roommate, but that doesn't mean I want a relationship with him.

It sounds to me like you like this girl as a friend and are only persuing a physical relationship because she wants it, and you don't want to disappoint. If that is true, it will most likely turn bad for both of you.

thats probably because I know that most people would think she's ugly with her light blue eye's and the mole on the side of her head

Well i dont think you should really say anything based on what u think other pople will think.. what is important is what you think.. i mean you have to have some attraction towards her..

does the bestfriend know of your love affair?
well, she know's that I like Sarah, but she doesn't know that Sarah likes me, at least not that I know of. So I guess not.

Well i dont think you should really say anything based on what u think other pople will think.. what is important is what you think.. i mean you have to have some attraction towards her..
I do, It's just that #1 I am usually very apathetic, and #2 didn't know how else to get the point across.

I do, It's just that #1 I am usually very apathetic, and #2 didn't know how else to get the point across.

If you are going to be torn between what your friends think and this girl then you should keep it platonic as well.

I do, It's just that #1 I am usually very apathetic, and #2 didn't know how else to get the point across.

Remind me again about what the issue is..

If you are going to be torn between what your friends think and this girl then you should keep it platonic as well.

but he finds her attractive and she feels the same way if not more about him

but he finds her attractive and she feels the same way if not more about him

I personally question how much of a physical attraction he has for her, but even if he does find her attractive, having this much trouble reconciling his friends opinions foreshadows problems in the future.

If you are going to be torn between what your friends think and this girl then you should keep it platonic as well.
Okay, In the begining, I wanted nothing more than just a friendship. A couple months go by, I notice, that we've began flirting. Then we go do some field trip for a class, it was cold and early so we started cuddling, in a sense of the word, and thats when I realized I liked her. I was the one to initiate the cuddling. Later we start hanging out more and more we watch a movie. Others leave we :fluffle: couple days later we do practicly the same routine with the movie, which brings us up to the present and the issue at hand.

I personally question how much of a physical attraction he has for her, but even if he does find her attractive, having this much trouble reconciling his friends opinions foreshadows problems in the future.

She must be worth it though. Why should he waste a good reltionship because of what others will think... i think he should have a discussion with his bestfriend and lover mate and really communicate and talk.

With my relationships..the most important thing is honesty and communication...

She must be worth it though. Why should he waste a good reltionship because of what others will think... i think he should have a discussion with his bestfriend and lover mate and really communicate and talk.

With my relationships..the most important thing is honesty and communication...
Which is pretty much what I was planning on doing from the begining, I just didn't want your lovely thread to die an early death.

Which is pretty much what I was planning on doing from the begining, I just didn't want your lovely thread to die an early death.

Thank you for the thought.. My thread probably would have died and well thank you for keeping it alive.. This is the first thread i have started and it has been well interesting.. I hope that you got something out of it..

Anyone else have issues regarding love to discuss?

Well, age gaps usually do not make that much difference to mature relationships. However, you are way too young to be seeing someone whose had already started college. The maturity is not so much it, as the experiences you both have had, and he has had many more than you.

I know from my own life, the decisions I made at 15 and 16 were not that good, and had a tremendous on my life. Sometimes it is the simple ones that can have long lasting affects.

Just think hard about where you are both going and if your paths cross or run parallel.

I recognize this, and I would never normally date someone this much older than me. But i also feel like this a competely different situation. He hasn't been getting laid in the past few ears, he's been fleeing his country to avoid ethnic cleansing. And he's not some college perv preying on highschool girls. He's a foreigner who's looking for some companionship.

I recognize this, and I would never normally date someone this much older than me. But i also feel like this a competely different situation. He hasn't been getting laid in the past few ears, he's been fleeing his country to avoid ethnic cleansing. And he's not some college perv preying on highschool girls. He's a foreigner who's looking for some companionship.

Well i think you should go for it but you should be careful.. also.. maybe you would be better off as friends?

I think we'll start out that way, but there's just too much chemistry for us to stay just friends. So I need to either decide that he's too old for me, or allow myself to date him.