NationStates Jolt Archive


My problem with the 'great flood'

BLARGistania
02-01-2005, 20:45
Okay, God looks at the world, decides its crap, decides to destroy it. Makes it rain, giant flood engulfs the world.

But what about all the fish? There has to be a lot of evil fish swimming around.

And the ducks? Can you imagine an evil duck? Quack Quack, I am evil. I mean they just swam around.

If the flood destryoed everything evil, what happened to all the evil fish and sea mammels and ducks and geese and so on?
Superpower07
02-01-2005, 20:47
-snip-
I'm agnostic so I don't know if it really happened or not, but (just to play the devil's advocate) the sea's temperature could have been thrown out of balance, and animals can only live in an ocean that's so cold or warm.
Our Earth
02-01-2005, 20:49
You can't have evil fish in that system of dogma, so the only important thing is that you kill all the humans, which a flood would accomplish.
BLARGistania
02-01-2005, 20:51
You can't have evil fish in that system of dogma, so the only important thing is that you kill all the humans, which a flood would accomplish.
Why can't you have evil fish? or evil ducks? You know, just like in Hitchcock's The Birds but its Ducks.
Superpower07
02-01-2005, 20:52
You can't have evil fish in that system of dogma
Even though it's not evil, what about the Jesus fish? ' <>< ' :D
Tactical Grace
02-01-2005, 20:53
Good and Evil are human qualities, only humans can possess them. Animals can be neither good nor evil, they were placed upon the Earth for us to exploit. So goes the Christian explanation.

Personally, I do not believe in good and evil, nor do I believe in deeper meaning of any sort behind events. The universe is profoundly indifferent to our existence.
BLARGistania
02-01-2005, 20:55
well, why can't animals be good and evil.

Evil giraffe - " I have eaten all the leaves off this tree. when the other animals wake up, there will be no leaves left on the tree. And some animals may die."

I mean seriously, evil animals. It could happen.
Leppi
02-01-2005, 22:29
Dont forget about the dolphins and whales since:

Intellegince = sin

they are the third evilest thing alive.
Lunatic Goofballs
02-01-2005, 22:43
Animals are never evil.

Except cats. Cats are evil. But that's it. No other animals are evil.
HC Eredivisie
02-01-2005, 22:43
Animals are never evil.

Except cats. Cats are evil. But that's it. No other animals are evil.
pigeons!
Soviet Narco State
02-01-2005, 22:45
Animals are never evil.

Except cats. Cats are evil. But that's it. No other animals are evil.

Uh you forgot the most evil animal of all! The snake! I assume all the ducks died when they didn't have any land to sleep on and drowned when they got tired. All the fish died after the flood when the waters receded and they were left high and dry. See God killed all the evil animals.
Texan Hotrodders
02-01-2005, 22:47
Okay, God looks at the world, decides its crap, decides to destroy it. Makes it rain, giant flood engulfs the world.

But what about all the fish? There has to be a lot of evil fish swimming around.

And the ducks? Can you imagine an evil duck? Quack Quack, I am evil. I mean they just swam around.

If the flood destryoed everything evil, what happened to all the evil fish and sea mammels and ducks and geese and so on?

The Bible tells a story about God mass-murdering 99% of the human population at the time, and you are worried about the damn fish?
Lunatic Goofballs
02-01-2005, 22:48
pigeons!

Pigeons aren't evil. They're New Yorkers. No matter where in the world you are, if you see a pigeon, it's a New Yorker. New York pigeons are twice as bad.
JuNii
02-01-2005, 22:48
well, why can't animals be good and evil.

Evil giraffe - " I have eaten all the leaves off this tree. when the other animals wake up, there will be no leaves left on the tree. And some animals may die."

I mean seriously, evil animals. It could happen.Man ate from the tree of Knowledge and gained the Knowledge of Good and Evil. Thus only Man can be Good or Evil.
HC Eredivisie
02-01-2005, 22:50
Pigeons aren't evil. They're New Yorkers. No matter where in the world you are, if you see a pigeon, it's a New Yorker. New York pigeons are twice as bad.
here we have dutch pigeons, LAZY, fat, dutch pigeons, they shit on everything and are too lazy to move, i doubt they even know how to fly. we must kill them!
Kwangistar
02-01-2005, 22:55
All the evil fish couldn't handle the decreased levels of salt content that followed from that much rain.
Marabal
02-01-2005, 23:19
BLARGistania....I scheduled you an appontiment with a therapist. He wants to see you, he found the duck part quite interesting.

By the way, instead of the title My problem with the great flood, it should be "My mental problem" :D
Zeppistan
02-01-2005, 23:43
It wasn't God that caused the flood. IT was actually Noah's son who was being potty trained and stuffed a whole roll of toilet paper down the loo and left the water running.

Noah just thought up the God bit afterwards as an excuse in case anyone asked.....
Naturality
03-01-2005, 03:23
The Bible tells a story about God mass-murdering 99% of the human population at the time, and you are worried about the damn fish?


Rofl.
-----------------
Animals aren't naturally evil, but some people are.
The flood's purpose was to do a clean sweep of people. That's why there was 2 of the unclean and 7 of the clean (land mammals) taken aboard the Ark to replenish the earth afterwards.
Zeppistan
03-01-2005, 03:41
And the ducks? Can you imagine an evil duck? Quack Quack, I am evil. I mean they just swam around.


http://www.captainquack.com/images/products/25_large.jpg

They're out there.... threatening bath times all over the world.
BLARGistania
03-01-2005, 04:11
http://www.captainquack.com/images/products/25_large.jpg

They're out there.... threatening bath times all over the world.
yes, those rubber ducks are secretly taking over the world.
Vegas-Rex
03-01-2005, 04:21
Dont forget about the dolphins and whales since:

Intellegince = sin

they are the third evilest thing alive.
Second, after mice (read hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy)
Unaha-Closp
03-01-2005, 04:27
Lifted from a slightly odd site http://www.truechristian.com/kidznoah.html :

God said 2 of each of the animal species in the world got to go on the ark!! Now since there has only been about 50,000,000,000 animal species that have existed, that means Noah gathered 100,000,000,000 animals onto his ark!

Genesis 6
15 And this is the fashion which thou shalt make it of: The length of the ark shall be three hundred cubits, the breadth of it fifty cubits, and the height of it thirty cubits.

Back then, people used a measurement called cubits! In America, a cubit is 1.5 feet! That means that Noah's Ark was 450 feet long, 75 feet wide, and 45 feet tall! Noah's ark was also only 3 stories tall, tall like a building!!!

Genesis 6
16 A window shalt thou make to the ark, and in a cubit shalt thou finish it above; and the door of the ark shalt thou set in the side thereof; with lower, second, and third stories shalt thou make it.

Wow!! Isn't that the coolest! Noah's ark had about 101,205 square feet, or about 988,094 animals per square foot! WOW! Isn't God just amazing how He works! God and Noah both planned well and survived the 40 day and 40 night trek as the world flooded, and the 6 month period after the water receded after the 40 days and 40 nights.
Soviet Narco State
03-01-2005, 04:49
What I always wondered was this. Many animals are purely carniverous, they only eat meat, like most lizards, snakes, birds of prey etc. Does that mean he brought a few hundred extra rats and mice to feed his komodo dragons with? Also what about all the plants, they must have died too. Did he have a second ark for all the trees and shrubs? Something about this story doesnt add up.
Dahyj
03-01-2005, 04:50
Man ate from the tree of Knowledge and gained the Knowledge of Good and Evil. Thus only Man can be Good or Evil.
Are you honestly saying that with all the animals there, if they have no "intelligence" as was stated earlier, that they didn't eat the fruit? No worms on the tree of knowledge?
Dahyj
03-01-2005, 04:51
All the evil fish couldn't handle the decreased levels of salt content that followed from that much rain.
Well what about fresh water fish?
Dahyj
03-01-2005, 04:58
Lifted from a slightly odd site http://www.truechristian.com/kidznoah.html :

Thank you, this has made me a happy man ^_^
Gnostikos
03-01-2005, 05:28
God said 2 of each of the animal species in the world got to go on the ark!! Now since there has only been about 50,000,000,000 animal species that have existed, that means Noah gathered 100,000,000,000 animals onto his ark!
Not all animals reproduce sexually, especially if you put parthenogenesis in, so I don't know why Noah would've needed two amoebae or two aphides, and we do not know how many species animals there are currently. It is theorised that we only know half of the number of insects in the world. And they compose 70% or so of all known animals, if I recall correctly.
Mentholyptus
03-01-2005, 05:35
Dont forget about the dolphins and whales since:

Intellegince = sin

they are the third evilest thing alive.
No, they're the second. First are the white mice. Third are people.
BLARGistania
03-01-2005, 06:46
hey mentho.

and a big w00t for DA
Kroisistan
03-01-2005, 07:04
Okay, God looks at the world, decides its crap, decides to destroy it. Makes it rain, giant flood engulfs the world.

But what about all the fish? There has to be a lot of evil fish swimming around.

And the ducks? Can you imagine an evil duck? Quack Quack, I am evil. I mean they just swam around.

If the flood destryoed everything evil, what happened to all the evil fish and sea mammels and ducks and geese and so on?

I don't know, but I'll bet the flood actually occured. There are flood myths cultures across the world (http://www.talkorigins.org/faqs/flood-myths.html#Maung), and giving the diversity of cultures, I don't see how a flood could be a motif unless it was an actual event. If your a Jung-ist you might say it's part of our collective unconscious. I personally believe it occured, and these myths are mankinds memories of the incident.

What about the stories of Noah's ark on Mt. Ararat in Turkey? Anyone heard about that? Supposedly it might be up there.
Smeagol-Gollum
03-01-2005, 07:37
One word : Kangaroos.
That's right I am Australian.
If a "great Flood" covered the whole earth, how did a pair of kangaroos manage to travel to the Ark, and then all the way back to Australia, where they managed to revive tha native population. Or koalas, or platypuses (platypi?).
Feel free to insert your own favourite "found nowhere else" native animal.
Doesn't make sense.
Lunatic Goofballs
03-01-2005, 07:45
One word : Kangaroos.
That's right I am Australian.
If a "great Flood" covered the whole earth, how did a pair of kangaroos manage to travel to the Ark, and then all the way back to Australia, where they managed to revive tha native population. Or koalas, or platypuses (platypi?).
Feel free to insert your own favourite "found nowhere else" native animal.
Doesn't make sense.

Koalas can teleport. I saw it in a cartoon as a child.

They just stay in Australia because they are addicted to eucalyptus leaves. The kangaroos hitched a ride with the koalas. *nod*
Lzrd
03-01-2005, 07:51
I don't know, but I'll bet the flood actually occured. There are flood myths cultures across the world (http://www.talkorigins.org/faqs/flood-myths.html#Maung), and giving the diversity of cultures, I don't see how a flood could be a motif unless it was an actual event. If your a Jung-ist you might say it's part of our collective unconscious. I personally believe it occured, and these myths are mankinds memories of the incident.

What about the stories of Noah's ark on Mt. Ararat in Turkey? Anyone heard about that? Supposedly it might be up there.
Welcome to Earth, where there's lots of water, and not all of it is in the oceans. Floods occur all over the world.
And that Ark thing was so silly it wasn't even funny. I think that was 2-5+ years ago. From a satellite picture showing a triangular shape. You'd think they'd have found out by now.

But the original post really made my morning. Official "Lolled out loud"-stamp!
Pussitania
03-01-2005, 08:45
well, why can't animals be good and evil.

Evil giraffe - " I have eaten all the leaves off this tree. when the other animals wake up, there will be no leaves left on the tree. And some animals may die."

*clap clap*

I love Eddie Izzard. (/James Mason-God voice)
Glinde Nessroe
03-01-2005, 08:47
Okay, God looks at the world, decides its crap, decides to destroy it. Makes it rain, giant flood engulfs the world.

But what about all the fish? There has to be a lot of evil fish swimming around.

And the ducks? Can you imagine an evil duck? Quack Quack, I am evil. I mean they just swam around.

If the flood destryoed everything evil, what happened to all the evil fish and sea mammels and ducks and geese and so on?

WHat did you expect from the bible...Truth? ha my ass.
Rogue Angelica
03-01-2005, 08:53
Well screw the animals, how the hell did WE get from there over to America or Australia? And if that were to happen, have only, what was it, 8 individuals left from a species, the odds that the species would recover are slim to none.
Lunatic Goofballs
03-01-2005, 08:56
Well screw the animals, how the hell did WE get from there over to America or Australia? And if that were to happen, have only, what was it, 8 individuals left from a species, the odds that the species would recover are slim to none.

Well, there was Noah, his wife. Their seven sons and their wives.

So, I'm thinking there was a lot of swinging going on afterward. *waggles eyebrows*
Rogue Angelica
03-01-2005, 09:00
still wouldn't matter. at the very least, those cheetahs must have taken out a couple of them when they were let off.
BLARGistania
04-01-2005, 00:48
oh yeah, LG, I found out you were my 14th cousin 8 times removed from my mother's side.

You can thank the third son of Noah for that one.
Gnostikos
04-01-2005, 01:40
platypuses (platypi?)
Platypuses is acceptable. If you want to use the foreign plural, it is platypodes.
Omnibenevolent Discord
04-01-2005, 02:07
Both the flood and ark motifs are extremely common the world over, only missing from Japanese and Egyptian cultures, and most of them come with descriptions of even worse disaters leading up to the flood, including fire rains, boiling rivers, earthquakes. One of the more interesting books I've read is The Atlantis Enigma which explains how a supernova fragment could've passed over the earth and would explain all of them, the flood being a result of the gravity of the fragment drawing the water towards the north pole, then breaking once it passed, tilting the earth's axis in the process and generally fucking up the planet and indeed the entire solar system.

But the one thing that never sat right with me about the Biblical flood myth was this: God is suppose to be all-knowing, infailable, and beyond the linear constraints of time, right? And yet, here he is, wiping out the entire human race because it was evil and corrupt, but saving Noah and his family to repopulate the earth, knowing full well that the new breed of humans were going to become just as evil and corrupt as the last, then deciding he made a mistake and vowed to never do that again. What I want to know is, why did he even bother to wipe out everyone in the first place? Doesn't it seem like a wasted effort and totally inexplicable coming from a being who is able to see every point in time at once and cannot make mistakes?

Adam and Eve never sat right with me either.. I mean, why was it so important to God that humans be kept in ignorance and why did they find being naked inheriently evil and thus shameful after eating the apple?

I tried reading the Bible, but I didn't even get through Genesis before it raised so many unanswerable questions that I didn't think it could be worth the effort...