NationStates Jolt Archive


Ninjas Vs. Pirates!

Neo-Tommunism
19-12-2004, 20:07
This has been the greatest debate of the universe for all eternity. Who is better? Is it the stealthy Ninja, or the drunken pirate? You decide!
Kisarazu
19-12-2004, 20:09
how about a drunken ninja?
Neo-Tommunism
19-12-2004, 20:10
My vote goes towards the pirate. Overall, they live a better life, always drinking, living by their own rules, and plundering, lots of plundering. A ninja couldn't match a pirates drunken swashbuckling, and the pirate may decide to just shoot the ninja. Either way, in the end, pirates end up with the most booty.
Backwatertin
19-12-2004, 20:11
My vote goes towards the pirate. Overall, they live a better life, always drinking, living by their own rules, and plundering, lots of plundering. A ninja couldn't match a pirates drunken swashbuckling, and the pirate may decide to just shoot the ninja. Either way, in the end, pirates end up with the most booty.

yeah their MOMMAS booty
Gurguvungunit
19-12-2004, 20:11
Howzabout drunken pirattical Ninjas?
General Mike
19-12-2004, 20:11
how about a drunken ninja?Or a stealth pirate?
Backwatertin
19-12-2004, 20:12
how about a drunken ninja?

you are my hero...
Neo-Tommunism
19-12-2004, 20:13
Or a stealth pirate?

Pirates can't be stealthy. They have parrots that squak, and they smell like booze.
Armed Bookworms
19-12-2004, 20:16
My vote goes towards the pirate. Overall, they live a better life, always drinking, living by their own rules, and plundering, lots of plundering. A ninja couldn't match a pirates drunken swashbuckling, and the pirate may decide to just shoot the ninja. Either way, in the end, pirates end up with the most booty.
The pirate would have to see the ninja first.
Neo-Tommunism
19-12-2004, 20:21
The pirate would have to see the ninja first.

Sure, the ninja might take out a few pirates, but they are plentiful, and would soon notice the ninja. Then it would be a quick cannon to the face.
Pennterra
19-12-2004, 20:24
Pirates have guns, ships, and rum. Therefore, they win.

Ninjas have cool swords, though.
Kisarazu
19-12-2004, 20:26
you are my hero...
join the cult my friend...join the cult. :D
Armed Bookworms
19-12-2004, 20:28
Pirates have guns, ships, and rum. Therefore, they win.

Ninjas have cool swords, though.
Do not forget ninjitsu.
Pennterra
19-12-2004, 20:34
Do not forget ninjitsu.

Ninjitsu? HAH! Drunken brawl > Ninjitsu.

Heck, if the pirate's good enough, he may be able to convert the ninja. You can never have too many ninjas, you know.
Liebermonk
19-12-2004, 20:34
Yes, but Ninjas can be lit on fire, wrapped in bacon, and speed through a Hospital zone...
Chicken pi
19-12-2004, 20:34
Pirates get to keelhaul people, but Ninjas get swords, nunchuks, throwing stars, etc...

Hmmmm.
Da Bling
19-12-2004, 20:47
ninjas would woop pirates asses bad :mp5:
Neo-Tommunism
19-12-2004, 20:52
ninjas would woop pirates asses bad :mp5:

Ninjas don't get assault rifles, my friend. A ninja could cut a pirate's hand off, and the pirate would just slap a hook in the stub and keep on slashing. They are hardcore. You don't ever see a ninja with a hook.
Criminalia
19-12-2004, 20:52
Pirates get to keelhaul people, but Ninjas get swords, nunchuks, throwing stars, etc...

Hmmmm.


Who says pirates can't have swords? Cutlasses, rapiers, yarr!!

Anyway, there are pros and cons to both ninjas and pirates.

Pirate pros: Booze, live-by-own-rules, travel the world, plunder, pillage and get laid and basically murder anyone that pisses you off while you're on your 9th beer. And the whole swashbuckling thing is badass, too.

Ninja pros: Stealth, code of conduct, poison usage and totally awesome assassin training from Mars. And a repetoire of weapons and ninja suit +3.

Pirate cons: Squawking parrots that aren't quite potty-trained, not very admirable bathing habits, vermin encrusted, hunted by the various naveys. And there's that whole mutiny thing, and when you're out at sea for months without a wench, things can get pretty lonely. Soon you'll start giving odd looks to the cabin boy. Or worse, the cap'n will give odd looks to YOU. That is, if you're a staunch heterosexual. Plus the whole venereal disease thing.

Ninja cons: Basically worthless on the whole heirarchy, if you're stuck you're basically screwed. There's also that code of conduct: if you dishonor yourself badly enough, you've gotta eviscerate yourself. Which, from what I've heard, really, really hurts and isn't very nice for your parents to find when you don't come down when its dinner time. Besides, also from what I've heard, depending on the ninja group, there's codes of chastity, too.

Pirates outweigh ninjas by both aspects. They get better benefits, but they also get worse drawbacks.

So the only answer is, of course, the Drunken Master.
Kisarazu
19-12-2004, 21:00
and you know who would kill all pirates and ninjas in 1 punch??.......


























http://www.aimchange.com/upload/store/Bruce%20Lee.gif
BRUCE LEE!
Chicken pi
19-12-2004, 21:02
Who says pirates can't have swords? Cutlasses, rapiers, yarr!!



Cutlasses? Rapiers? You call them swords?!? Pah, ninja swords rock.
Ravea
19-12-2004, 21:06
Ninja-Pirate. 'Tis the only answer.

I REGRET NOTHING! YARRRRG!
Texan Hotrodders
19-12-2004, 21:06
Ninjas don't get assault rifles, my friend. A ninja could cut a pirate's hand off, and the pirate would just slap a hook in the stub and keep on slashing. They are hardcore. You don't ever see a ninja with a hook.

That's because ninjas are generally good enough that they don't get their hands cut off.
Criminalia
19-12-2004, 21:07
Cutlasses? Rapiers? You call them swords?!? Pah, ninja swords rock.


Yes, I call them swords! Just because one thing's better doesn't mean the less-than-greater thing isn't what it is. I have plenty of blades of my own, up to and including:

1 hand-and-a-half sword
1 katar
1 wakizashi
2 scimitar (no Drizzt references please)
1 cutlass
1 longsword
9 bokken (wooden katana)
1 shinai (bamboo practice sword)
1 rapier
1 dagger
4 knives

Katana are the epitome of swordforging skill, yes. But that doesn't mean the others don't qualify as swords.

Swords have three purposes. They are purely offensive weapons.
Purpose #1: Kill.
Purpose #2: Maim.
Purpose #3: Hurt very badly.

Some may say, 'No! Swords can be defensive weapons!' Yes, but still, their core purpose lies in offense. You can parry and you can block. But you do so enough to be able to kill, maim, or very badly hurt your opponent. The core of it is to kill/maim/hurt. Hence, offensive. Bwahahahaha!
Ravea
19-12-2004, 21:09
Hmm....How good are you with a rapier? 'Tis my weapon of choice.
Chicken pi
19-12-2004, 21:11
Yes, I call them swords! Just because one thing's better doesn't mean the less-than-greater thing isn't what it is.


No worries, I was just being a silly billy.


Anyway, back to business. Who would win in a fight between a bear and a shark?
Tanara
19-12-2004, 21:11
Well the Japans had pirates, they were called wako, if I recall correctly...and they had ninja...

both rock ( and both ..well have their bad points as has been pointed out ) but hey, put them together-

ninja pirates

and that says it all
Ravea
19-12-2004, 21:12
Well the Japans had pirates, they were called wako, if I recall correctly...and they had ninja...

both rock ( and both ..well have their bad points as has been pointed out ) but hey, put them together-

ninja pirates

and that says it all

Beat ya to it, bud.
Criminalia
19-12-2004, 21:18
Well the Japans had pirates, they were called wako, if I recall correctly...and they had ninja...

both rock ( and both ..well have their bad points as has been pointed out ) but hey, put them together-

ninja pirates

and that says it all


Drunken master! Drunken master! Its the epitome! Waaaarrghh!


And a shark or a bear, Chicken (pot) pi? Well, that's a very good question. Let me put on my patented Stupometron (tm) helmet!
*clank*
Prepare to activate!
*push....CRRKKAAZZZSAAAPPP!!!*
"Well, the answer's simple, really," says C's player, head smoking.
"The answer is..."
The content of the remains of C's statement cannot be printed here, due to international copywright laws or some giant jellyfish suddenly devouring him in his chair. Or something like that. No answer for you!
Red East
19-12-2004, 21:22
Ninjas totally rock, they even have their own metal genre:

www.ninjamagic.tk (No its not me on guitar...)

and

http://members.lycos.co.uk/shadowwarriors666/

, so

HAHAHA!
Criminalia
19-12-2004, 21:24
Ninjas totally rock, they even have their own metal genre:

www.ninjamagic.tk (No its not me on guitar...)

and

http://members.lycos.co.uk/shadowwarriors666/

, so

HAHAHA!


They also have their own fast food conglomerate: Ninja Burger!

http://www.ninjaburger.com
Grave_n_idle
19-12-2004, 21:25
Long has this argument continued....

http://www.little-gamers.com/index.php?strip_id=990
Ydirland
19-12-2004, 21:31
Where is the demon ghost pirate option?
Karas
19-12-2004, 21:31
Ninjas and Pirates must not fight. They must team-up, otherwise the mockingbird wins.

http://www.stanford.edu/~scodary/tkam.htm
Phil IV
19-12-2004, 21:36
yarr! pirates have all the best tunes! yarr!

no, wait, thats the Devil, oops...
Slacker Clowns
19-12-2004, 21:40
Pirates are kewler than ninjas because,

1. Lego pirates were cooler-looking than Lego ninjas.

2. Ninjas aren't allowed to grow stubble and act rude.

3. There is no such thing as "Talk like a Ninja Day" while there is a "Talk like a Pirate Day":

Talk Like a Pirate Day (http://talklikeapirate.com)

4. Ninjas do not shout "Avast!"

5. Ninjas don't drink grog.

6. Ninja sounds like "ninny."

Pirates win hands down.
Ernst_Rohm
19-12-2004, 21:49
sometimes pirates and ninjas can work together as in the famous "how to kill a mockingbird"


http://www.stanford.edu/~scodary/tkam.htm
Zarbia
19-12-2004, 21:51
Pirates are way cooler than ninjas.
Ravea
19-12-2004, 21:55
Pirates are kewler than ninjas because,

1. Lego pirates were cooler-looking than Lego ninjas.

2. Ninjas aren't allowed to grow stubble and act rude.

3. There is no such thing as "Talk like a Ninja Day" while there is a "Talk like a Pirate Day":

Talk Like a Pirate Day (http://talklikeapirate.com)

4. Ninjas do not shout "Avast!"

5. Ninjas don't drink grog.

6. Ninja sounds like "ninny."

Pirates win hands down.

Pirates can also say, "Booty!"
Ernst_Rohm
19-12-2004, 21:59
Pirates are kewler than ninjas because,

1. Lego pirates were cooler-looking than Lego ninjas.

2. Ninjas aren't allowed to grow stubble and act rude.

3. There is no such thing as "Talk like a Ninja Day" while there is a "Talk like a Pirate Day":

Talk Like a Pirate Day (http://talklikeapirate.com)

4. Ninjas do not shout "Avast!"

5. Ninjas don't drink grog.

6. Ninja sounds like "ninny."

Pirates win hands down.


and pirates are often associated with rough gay sex and that's also super cool. where as ninja are only obscurely related to gay sex through the works of mishima(which i don't believe ever actually mention ninjas per se but do have a rightwing backwards looking japanese ultranationalist groove ).
L-rouge
19-12-2004, 22:01
Pi-rats win everytime, me hearties, yarrr!

Ninja's, they be good for nothin' sneaks, Narr!
Rusbekizstan
19-12-2004, 22:03
Neither...SAMURAI
Red East
19-12-2004, 22:04
Stop bashing ninjas! Or else I´ll tell me mum! *cries*
Basuria
19-12-2004, 22:05
http://www.jinx.com/scripts/details.asp?affid=-1&productID=357
Ernst_Rohm
19-12-2004, 22:06
Stop bashing ninjas! Or else I´ll tell me mum! *cries*
ninja look just like iraqi insurgents except the don't usually have rpg launchers slung over their shoulders... i generally think the rpgs actually add to the cool factor a bit.
Dwiggles
19-12-2004, 22:13
http://albinoblacksheep.com/flash/plaid.php

...Tiny plaid ninjas? Har har har.

Not very cool that they ripped off a great line from Monty Python for the title.
Sileetris
19-12-2004, 22:32
Its all a matter of numbers.

Pirates function well in mobs, raiding towns, etc. Wheras ninjas in large numbers are easily killed(known as mook syndrome).

Ninjas function best as single units, sneaking into castles and killing people, etc. Whereas pirates alone are easily caught by the city guard.

1 ninja vs. mob of pirates.......equal match

mob of ninjas vs. mob of pirates......pirate victory

1 ninja vs. 1 pirate......ninja victory

The deciding factor, that gives ninjas the overall advantage, is the stealthy entrance. If a ninja can sneak into a pirate camp, the ninja will probably win. If pirates were to surround the ninja's cave hideout, the ninja would lose, but its harder to sneak around with a mob of pirates. Overall, ninjas get a slight advantage.
Chicken pi
19-12-2004, 22:40
ninja look just like iraqi insurgents except the don't usually have rpg launchers slung over their shoulders... i generally think the rpgs actually add to the cool factor a bit.

Depends on whether or not it's a robot ninja.
Petsburg
19-12-2004, 22:41
I be a pirate, and Ye be false to compare there 'ere ninja to us manly pirates!
Spielman
19-12-2004, 22:41
Of course pirates are better, Who whould you rather party with a pirate or a ninja?
Ninjadom Revival
19-12-2004, 22:54
Ninjas always win.
:mp5:
Chicken pi
19-12-2004, 23:08
Ninjas always win.
:mp5:

Not if they're fighting a pirate king.
Nupax
19-12-2004, 23:55
Flipping Out versus Drunken Swashbuckling?

Too close too call...
Zion-Y
20-12-2004, 01:16
If we're debating overall coolness here, I'd have to say pirates, just because they're really really drunk. And have ships. Ninjas don't have ships.

However, if you're asking who'd win in a fight, then I'd definately go with the ninja. I mean, some pirates are pretty good with swords, but how good can you BE with a sword when you're drunk? I mean, eventually you're probably going to fall off of something, or stab yourself, or trip. Ninjas, however, have all KINDS of cool weapons, amazing agility and speed, and all kinds of mad skillz a pirate couldn't even dream of. The ninja would definately kick that pirate's ass before he knew what was going on. Actually...forget the first thing I said, ninjas are cooler.

I ran into a debate awhile ago about wether a samurai or a ninja would win in a fight. I said a ninja, but it's a tough question. Any thoughts?
Coastal Pirates
20-12-2004, 01:21
Pirates of course! Sheesh. Whach'ya think we celebrate al the time for?! It's cause we got booty, and them black shirts got none!
Ravea
20-12-2004, 01:26
I ran into a debate awhile ago about wether a samurai or a ninja would win in a fight. I said a ninja, but it's a tough question. Any thoughts?

Depends. In terms of head-to-head battle, I would probably say Samurai. After all, they are armored and are as good with a sword as ninjas. However, if the Ninja had the chance to strike first, then he would win. It even comes down to the skill of the Ninja and Samurai. Let's say Kakashi (From Naruto) faced Tom Cruise as he was in The Last Samurai in a fair, head to head battle. Now, as skilled as our man Tom is, Kakashi would undoubtedly kick his sorry armored ass with Ninjitsu and cool weapons. So, I wouild say it's a toss-up between Samurai and Ninja.
Zion-Y
20-12-2004, 01:38
Depends. In terms of head-to-head battle, I would probably say Samurai. After all, they are armored and are as good with a sword as ninjas. However, if the Ninja had the chance to strike first, then he would win. It even comes down to the skill of the Ninja and Samurai. Let's say Kakashi (From Naruto) faced Tom Cruise as he was in The Last Samurai in a fair, head to head battle. Now, as skilled as our man Tom is, Kakashi would undoubtedly kick his sorry armored ass with Ninjitsu and cool weapons. So, I wouild say it's a toss-up between Samurai and Ninja.

yeah, I guess it does depend. It's a tricky question...we spent all of Alegbra debating it and still couldn't agree on anything.
Red East
20-12-2004, 21:16
And lo! As expected, the Mighty Flaming Ginger Ninjas of Glorious Doom are killing Pirates in their thousands (well, according to the poll results anyways..).

So all you "would-be" Pirates come forth and I, the Ginger Ninja of Cheezyness will teach you some manners!

Yarr!

(Didn´t mean to revive the thread but just couldn´t help but notice that the Ninjas are indeed winning ;) )
You Forgot Poland
20-12-2004, 21:20
OMG! Ninjas. Forget all this "depends on how many pirates and who gets the element of surprise." Even if it was one ninja and like a million pirates, still the ninja, all the way. Just because that's how totally frikkin awesome one ninja is.
Legless Pirates
20-12-2004, 21:24
Ninja's....




oh no pirates
Red East
20-12-2004, 21:27
Ninja's....




oh no pirates


Hey, you´re legless, you aren´t allowed to post!


"HIIII-YAAA! Heh, the tourists love that..."
Legless Pirates
20-12-2004, 21:28
Hey, you´re legless, you aren´t allowed to post!


"HIIII-YAAA! Heh, the tourists love that..."
Pirates don't care about what they are "allowed" to do. I'll do whatever I like and piss on you while I'm at it. So there :p
Red East
20-12-2004, 21:32
Pirates don't care about what they are "allowed" to do. I'll do whatever I like and piss on you while I'm at it. So there :p


Aww! Sooo forgot about that! *Hides in a dark corner*
Legless Pirates
20-12-2004, 21:34
Aww! Sooo forgot about that! *Hides in a dark corner*
*pisses in a dark corner*
Red East
20-12-2004, 21:36
*pisses in a dark corner*

Haha! That is where you think I am, but where you think I am I am not! So there!

Muahahhaha! *Echo of an evil laughter*

Bah, f*ck this, I´m to play a tune...
Lascivious Maximus
20-12-2004, 22:00
*gets up out of dark corner...*

shit! :mad:

and I voted for pirates, consider my vote repealed and placed on ninjas.