NationStates Jolt Archive

G.w Bush
Pillsbery Dough boy
Bannana phone

"Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring, Bannana Phone!"

None can defeat the Bannana phone!

pfffffffft Bush Could!

He doesnt know how to use the phone... so for some reason even though the phone itself has nothing to do with the song, Bush would ignore it, then he would eat the phone thinking it was a banana, then he would shove the Pillsbury doughboy in the oven turn himn into a pretzel, choke and die.

Then No-One Wins!

Cept for bush... probably doctors would be on the scene and revive him.


So.... Yay Bush!

No contest! Who can possibly resist warm cinnamon rolls dripping with rich gooey icing?

That sounds like something out of a Pr0n Movie! :D

"Oh Yeah! Put your rich gooey icing all over my warm cinnamon rolls!"

"Yeah! Yeah! C'mon! Pop that Tart!"


:D :fluffle: :D

Doughboy4tehwin!!!


no contest whatsoever. banana phone needs a user and nothing in the choices said there would be someone there to tell GWB what to do; so there is no way either of them could stand up to the sweet, home-baked wrath of the merciless doughboy.. hehehe.

as much as i would love to show entertaining pictures of doughboy in action... aside from the fact i might be warned by the mods... i'm also at college at the moment. :P

pfffffffft Bush Could!

He doesnt know how to use the phone... so for some reason even though the phone itself has nothing to do with the song, Bush would ignore it, then he would eat the phone thinking it was a banana, then he would shove the Pillsbury doughboy in the oven turn himn into a pretzel, choke and die.

Then No-One Wins!

Cept for bush... probably doctors would be on the scene and revive him.


So.... Yay Bush!

but it turns out one of the doctors is an assasinn and then...

pfffffffft Bush Could!

He doesnt know how to use the phone... so for some reason even though the phone itself has nothing to do with the song, Bush would ignore it, then he would eat the phone thinking it was a banana, then he would shove the Pillsbury doughboy in the oven turn himn into a pretzel, choke and die.

Then No-One Wins!

Cept for bush... probably doctors would be on the scene and revive him.


So.... Yay Bush!
But what it he chokes on the Pillsbury doughboy before he even sees the banana phone? then it wins you see it doesn't have to do anything!

Ah yes but you see, Bush would be talking... no no... doing a speech! And there'd be so much lies and broken grammar, that the banana phone would break because of the stupidity!

But the doughboy doesnt speak english... he's a french nazi if you remember. That's why bush would eat him.... burn him the ovens where he burnt the jewish doughboys. :(

Here's how it would play out.

One day, a suicide bomber would crash his car into the white house. The police would find a cinnamon roll in the passenger seat, and would begin investigating pillsbury. The dough boy would completely refuse, and would go into hiding, and becomes enraged at the idea of the government infringing on him...even though the police just wanted help with their investigation. He becomes an extremist, and prompts all bread products to rise up against America and Christianity. As a result, nutritionists find many carb-related health problems. All bread products die as they are consumed to inflict damage on Americans, but not before shouting "praises due to raisin!"

It isn't long before the U.S. declares war on pillsbury and begins mobilizing troops. During which, the banana phone begins taunting the U.S. and laughing at all the "infidels" who get fat from the carbs. Bush begins to wonder if the banana phone has anything to do with this, but lets it wait until the bread is gone. The rest of the U.N. denounces pillsbury, but mentions they cannot get around to helping out at this time. America goes in alone.

After months of war, the pillsbury dough boy commits suicide in a cave, blaming the war on the Jews, and saying his acts will gaurantee him 77 young, underage muffins in the afterlife. With this done, Bush goes to investigating banana phone, but is met with the same hostility. Canadian rich kids decide the carbs were a just act against evil America, and publicly sympathize with banana phone while renouncing Bush. Fed up with the run-around from banana phone, Bush decides to act, against wishes from the U.N. to keep sending inspectors. Even UN ethics council leader Adolf swargeston, ruler of some african country freshly back from a bloody genocide wishes against it, and Michael Moore makes a movie telling about how Bush really planned the suicide bombing and tried to blame the carb-related terrorism on bread. The movie becomes a huge hit in France.

It isn't long before the land of banana phone is overtaken by rebels, and eventually the leader, head banana phone, is caught hiding in a hole when Carrot Top dials down the middle and calls him. No evidence is found to suggest banana phone was connected to the dough boy, but we will never know if this is because there really was no involvement, or whether the time given by the U.N. to send "inspectors" there gave the government time to hide everything. Feeling Justified, the U.N. goes back to sitting around, and France declares itself "the sole voice of reason in these troubling times."

LOL

Great Story! :D

Dang banana conspiratists...