NationStates Jolt Archive

In the beginning he [Max Barry] created n00bs and RPers. He created the mods and the animals [Sephiroth :p ].

[You continue]

Then came the trolls. Who sometimes get cast into the deat/banned hell.

He made the Americans and anti-Americans, and each faction vied for His favor with human sacrifice.

And the flamers of hell were unleashed upon the world. Such grammar as "I Pwn0r7 you" became common language and the mods themselves cowered in fear.

then come the devil and created the bugs and the stupid threads.

Then cam the flamers, their great leaping flames burning down fresh threads with hatred.

Then he created the hijackers. Who diabolicly take over threads and turn the original topic into something completly different.

Max Barry looked upon His creation, The NS World, and saw that there was widespread sodomy.

But lo, as all seemed terrible he sent his favoured son to the forums. Myrth was his name, and he cast out the sinners into hell [general!]

Max Barry looked upon His creation, The NS World, and saw that there was widespread sodomy.

And skeletor.

http://www.he-man.org/news_images/lithos/litho_skeletor.jpg

Max Barry looked upon His creation, The NS World, and saw that there was widespread sodomy.


And skeletor.

http://www.he-man.org/news_images/lithos/litho_skeletor.jpg
And he was pleased. For this could increase his booksale.

And the Lord Max Barry said unto himself, "let there be lag!", and it was so, such that every evening, Greenwich Biblical Time, the world slowed.

Then came the great and holy thread crash, caused by the evil server gremlins, servents of Myrth...

And He [Max] said, thou shalt call me the Game Organizational Director... and he made and empowered many moderators... and it was good... AS they did war with the flammers, and the spammers, and the n00bs, and the multiers, and the griefers, and all sorts of the evil ones of this world.... casting them to the lowest of low hells of deletions and bans... And many a thread was closed, and many a post deleted by the Game Organizational Director's Moderation Angels...

and then came the spammers, who unleashed ghastly hordes of smiles :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) upon the unsuspecting forums inhabitants. even more horrible was the display of obscene images which caused a cloud of DEAT to pass over the spammers

But those cast into damnation were not broken. By using their diabolical powers they created new accounts for them and switchet IP adresses. So to return and haunt those that crushed them.

And the Twisted emoticon came, wreaked its havoc as the servant of the n00b, and died a quick death with the parting of the servers.

And the [Max] said; The evil ones hath clogged my forums, and wrecked havoc amongst my customers. And then the [Max] saith, let there be a time, two times, and time and a half, when the forums shall be no more... But at the ends of time, it shall be born anew, where lag knoweth not... And it was so.... for the days and times, the members did become agitated as their world vanished before their eyes... Some fled to the realm of IRC for safety and support... others bid their own times amongst the darkness of the regional forums....... And when time was up... the forums were back.... and lag was known not. The members did rejoice, and feasted upon the n00bs, and the griefers, and the flammers, and the breakfast cereals.....

And thus, the demon of Double Posts was cast into the forgotten realm, not to resurface until the prophesised modpocalypse.

And in the future, nations will forsake [Max]. The anti-Max will rise and claim to be prophet for all nations in place of [Max]. His words will deceive and built an alliance of such unholy proportions that spammers, griefers, trolls and n00b will follow to confront [Max] and Mods.

The nations of NS, II and General will rise in the name of [Max] to fight a war where the angels of deat will blow the trumpets of Jolt. Three times will they blow the Trumpets of Jolt and anti-Max will be consumed by mire and deatstone. Into the bowels of hell, will the anti-Max sink and as well as the ones who were deceived.

The time of the anti-Max is not now, but fall not for false cults of NS for they will corrupt the essence of NS!

And then came the Great Jolt, and all of the forums were transformed, and thus the evil server gremlins were banished forever.

But sadly still, the evil demons [n00bs] remain. Intent to destroy all our great leader [Max] has created. May they be cast way by the wrath of the MODs

But then, lo it came! The mods smote the unbelievers and all was fine. Then Sephiroth and Hataria, wrought havoc throughout the lands....

And he smore then....

...til innocent purveyors of coffee & secondhand books were persecuted & fled the land...