NationStates Jolt Archive

Some people are understandably nervous the first time they go to a gymnasium as they don't know the rules and are scared of asking the man with the sticky-out viens for help. Therefore I have compiled this list of rules to help elievate any uneccesary aprihension.

1. The Bruce Willis look-a-like MUST be either beaten, or equalled in any activity he does, failure to do so would only iflate his ego.

2. The same goes for people wearing 'United States Marine Corps.' t-shirts, but only if it is obvious that they have never been in either the United States, or the Marine Corps.

3. You must not under any circumstances allow yourself to be distracted by the rude women on the MTV channel. Failure to complie with this may result in accidents.

4. Avoid the old man with the sweat band - he is covered in carcenogenic talc which will cause you breathing problems.

Hope this helps, if anyone else has any more rules that I have missed then feel free to contribute.

Thanks, it all helps.
have no intention of joining a gym though.

..and avoid the overweight woman, thats struggling to breathe, she'll probably collapse on you, then sue you for it.

really i just felt sorry for your lack of replies,
hope you appreciate my sympathy

Some people are understandably nervous the first time they go to a gymnasium as they don't know the rules and are scared of asking the man with the sticky-out viens for help. Therefore I have compiled this list of rules to help elievate any uneccesary aprihension.

1. The Bruce Willis look-a-like MUST be either beaten, or equalled in any activity he does, failure to do so would only iflate his ego.

2. The same goes for people wearing 'United States Marine Corps.' t-shirts, but only if it is obvious that they have never been in either the United States, or the Marine Corps.

3. You must not under any circumstances allow yourself to be distracted by the rude women on the MTV channel. Failure to complie with this may result in accidents.

4. Avoid the old man with the sweat band - he is covered in carcenogenic talc which will cause you breathing problems.

Hope this helps, if anyone else has any more rules that I have missed then feel free to contribute.

Knowing some of my friends in the military... the dude wearing any military t-shirt must be beaten... especially if you're in another branch of the military.

If your headband is too tight, then take it off and put it on your arm... where it's suppose to go.

1. The Bruce Willis look-a-like MUST be either beaten, or equalled in any activity he does, failure to do so would only iflate his ego.

Unless he is either 'unbreakable', or a therapist for death-sighted children, in which case you should pin him under a big barbell until he promises you royalties.

Stretch before you begin